timestamps? i think yes. TIMESTAMPS ------------------------------------------------ 00:00 I Can't Handle Change - Roar 3:18 Happy Pills (Slowed, Red Light District cover) - Weathers 7:00 Alligator Skin Boots - McCafferty 9:24 Hadal Ahbek (Slowed + Reverb) - Issam Alnajjar 13:35 listen before i go (Slowed) - Billie Eilish 18:40 Just Take My Wallet - Jack Stauber('s Micropop) 19:58 Experience - Ludovico Einaudi 25:10 Kill Somebody - YUNGBLUD 28:16 Lights Are On - Tom Rosenthal ------------------------------------------------
My depression has been getting to me lately and so has my anxiety I'm crying in bed at 1 in the morning I enjoyed the playlist but when I "have to wake up" I'm going to be emotionless for like 3 hours heh- anyways loved it so so much
I hope you are feeling better and just know it will get better soon it takes time to heal. I know times are tough but you are strong.and whatever you do don't you ever try to end life
as someone who has issues with sh and self hate, this playlist hit very hard... it helped me to get tears out that I've been bottling up thank you for that thank you so much
I love crying. I have no idea why. I just love the feeling, and whenever I cry, I cry about e v e r y t h i n g. I cry for hours, and I end up crying so much that I physically can't cry any more, then I think, "I'm too tired to think about this anymore.." and I fall asleep hungry.
@@ultraviolence2642 same I love crying too, it makes me feel relieved and happy that I'm able to express myself by crying. It makes me so proud of myself?? I think:)
I’m listening to this playlist trying to convince myself to not pick up a knife and hurt myself…I have been “SH free” for 9 days but I’m still starving myself and I never go to sleep before 1:00am I have no energy.. to who ever is reading this, I know this isn’t any of your concern and your probably going through your own stuff but just writing this made me feel better…
Depression sucks but don’t hurt yourself, like the many people who say it because it’s true you will really regret it no matter what happens don’t do it it’s fine to stay up if you can’t fall asleep but just close your eyes and imagine what you want to imagine it could Be a world with fairy’s or something nobody’s judging you in that world count to 10 breath and remember why your still standing remember you’ll never find wonderland if your not willing to fall :) smile it’s actually proven when you smile you actually feel slightly happier, I personally don’t know what’s happened in your life but keep going please 😊😅
Hey dear, I'm a stranger but i hope you know that there are people out there who love and care for you, and hurting your sweet body like that wont do any good for yourself or others, I hope you get the help you really deserve
@@pal_mac_ thanks but I could never get help my mom has no money we are practically living off her boyfriend even if I asked her for therapy she probably wouldn’t and I’d be too scared
i keep thinking about all the shit ive done for people. snuck out to see them. invited them into my house even if my house was a mess bought them food gave them advice even when i suck at it listened to them remembered everything theyve told me or at least tried to made them laugh when i wasnt feeling it held my tongue because i knew it would hurt them took time out of my day to make time for them cooked them food defended them even if it hurt me shes saying im talking shit about her when it was months ago. i was a shitty person months ago, im so tired. ive done so much and its piling up again and again. i want to leave.
Oi, eu sei que você talvez não entenda oque eu estou escrevendo mas, é eu sei qual é a sensação de não se sentir o suficiente para as pessoas que você ama ou para seus amigos... É uma das piores coisas que eu já senti.. Espero que você se sinta melhor depois, que entenda que você é sim suficiente... Enfim, sinto muito se só acabei piorando tudo..
You should start loving yourself because you don't deserve anything bad only good things :) You should love yourself everyday step by step you can do it ! :)
You should keep being nice but don't pour all your energy onto people. Just try to make sure if people are taking advantage of you, if they are, leave them. Being kind to people usually does make you feel better! But don't just pour your heart and soul into it, maybe like a compliment or be that person who someone feels comfortable sharing their problems with, and ect! Try to take care of yourself before taking care of others, your happiness is more important than being there for someone who eventually leaves you or someone who forgets about you, and ect. I really hope you get the help you need; I have a discord if you need anyone to talk to! I hope you can start loving yourself, every little step matters!
HEY!!!! if you're listening to this playlist in the first place, you're probably in a really bad emotional state. if you wanna talk, yell, or just distract yourself, im here for ya. remember, youre loved so much and you deserve only good things. take care
It's currently 2:40 am, and I have a week and a half left of school. I have to finish an essay that was due last Thursday, then wake up tomorrow at 6:40. My room is a hecking mess, and I haven't eaten healthy since who knows when. BUT, I went skating with my friends in the warm spring sun today. I get to start the mountain bike season this upcoming Tuesday. I'm gonna restart this summer and do a complete clean out of my room, maybe paint a mural or two on the walls. I'll attempt reconstructing my broken sleep schedule, and maybe even start working. Too optimistic? Maybe... but it always helps. Thank you, sometimes it helps to rant into the void of the internet. Much love, and God protect everyone in this comment section.
Мне так херово, в начале июня я думала что закончила с sh.. Но не тут то было, я уже не режусь а кусаю ногти и губы итд. Мелкие штуки кароче, сейчас когда я это осознаю я рыдаю.. Мне страшно попросить родителей записать меня к психотерапевту. Мне стыдно что на меня будут тратить такие деньги, я понимаю что стыдиться нечего но я ничего не могу с этим пока что поделать. Думаю сказать отцу, он довольно понимающий. Спасибо что дали выговориться, мне стало легче.
Imposter syndrome really does just drain one. I constantly feel like I’m lying or cheating to everyone around me even though I’m not. I feel so fake but it’s never intentional. It’s weird, the thought that people genuinely care about me is such an alien concept like it just doesn’t make sense in my mind and no matter how many times I hear people tell me or I tell myself, it just doesn’t seem true. I’m an artist but I feel like I really don’t deserve the recognition I get. I’m always the one making the jokes and making people laugh in class or in my friend group but I feel like I’m lying to them by acting humorous and silly 24/7 when in fact it feels like my brain is killing itself. Just a dumb lil brain dump to get it off my chest I suppose. Hope everyone sees happier, warmer days soon
Yeah i fell exact this inside... i'm really the same as you! When people say that my drawings are good or even I am good for them, i tende to not think it is a real cumpliment that they are just going easy on me. Trying to make me feel better... my english sucks sorry!
omg i feel the same way. i thought i was the only one who felt that way and i was so confused to why i am feeling like that but i guess theres more people out there who feel the same :)
I used to always relate to these. I don't anymore. For anyone lying awake with whatever's on your mind, this is cliché, but it really does get better. I was close to s*icide at one point, and didn't think I was ever going to get better. But here I am today, still struggling from time to time, but *alive.* Your feelings are valid, and it's good to take time to feel them. Listen to this music, connect to others who are feeling bad if you want. But know that this is not going to last forever. Give yourself the chance to see things change.
I’m listening to this playlist trying to convince myself to not pick up a knife and hurt myself…I have been “SH free” for 9 days but I’m still starving myself and I never go to sleep before 1:00am I have no energy.. I know this isn’t any of your concern and your probably going through your own stuff but just writing this made me feel better…
@@pinkdevil5561 Hey, I'm glad writing it down made you feel better and I don't mind listening. 9 days without SH is a great accomplishment, and I hope you make that 10 days! Also, small steps are easier. Since you yourself wrote that you're starving yourself and probably should go to bed earlier, I'd suggest starting slowly with that. When you do things you thought you couldn't, like eating an energy bar or going to bed 00:30, that will gradually show your brain that it isn't impossible. Change is rarely something that comes without setbacks, so don't beat yourself up when you make mistakes. Try to be kind to yourself, it's all too easy to forget that. I believe in you, and I hope you have a good rest of your night ✨
@@AW-xc1xcI didn’t expect you to respond. I was just holding a knife and I stopped myself! I think I’ll be able to make it to 10 day’s and I’m honestly proud of myself even though my life is really hard right now I think I’m slowly coming back to reality. Thank you for responding so quickly and I hope you have a good night too :)
TW: SH This playlist hits home. I’ve starving myself then over indulging then throwing up and the cutting. It’s been a cycle like this since February. I’ve been struggling and recently my father noticed this(before you W dad- He isn’t. He basically ignores me for two weeks then ima sent off to my moms) He was my sh on my thighs I did 3 weeks ago and he questioned me, and told me what you’re therapist think? What your mom think? Stop it. When go home and change your pants so no one notices those. Come on let’s go home, and repeated it until I got to school. He got me self conscious to the point I ended up cutting even more but this time on my stomach. I’m 0 day from sh. I’m not gonna make it. I’m really not Edit: So. I was able to stop for less than a month but bows it’s 9;54pm on 5/26. I sh again. My dad is gonna kill me.
I understand, the worst part of SH is the guilt of relapsing. And also after your parents see your scars, they do nothing. I genuinely don't care about anything anymore, the only thing keeping me alive is god and praying :/
How are you now ? Please keep going 🤍 You are NOT alone and I feel you but I believe in you! You can overcome it try using rubber bands in the hands instead of cutting . Im here anytime for you so you can talk and say anything you want 🤍
@@Elsawidje.mark8 you can do it you can overcome it! You have to believe in you, I believe in you!🤍 For anything you want to talk vent here if you want
When I was listening to this I kept thinking about the friends I have I was there for them I helped them I fucking got into detention for 5 days after getting into a fight with the person who tried to hurt my friend But they never showed friendship to me I was dealing with a lot of suicidal thought, self harm, and I almost killed someone for them I even asked one of them if I was dead would you care She said “Good no one needs another psychopath here” That hit too hard
Damn... I won't say the same old bullsh*t like "I know what you feel" or anything else. I just want to say that I know what it's like to have fake friends. You're always there for them and they're... Always somewhere else when you need them... But when you tell them that, they just love to get upset and say bullshit like "of course we're friends !" And you're just like, "oh really ? Is that so b*tch ?! And where were you when I lost someone, when my grandma forgot about me and her husband got a gf ? Where were you when I was on that bridge and you didn't answer your God damn phone ?! A f*cking stranger helped me more than you !"... Sorry I got carried away, but anyway, I just hope it'll get better for you and that you'll find someone that will truly care for you like you'll care for them ! You're a good person, and I really hope it'll get better 'cause you deserve that ! Have the best day or night possible lovely human ❤️
@@pontevickyya9146 That's so sweet of you ! I have some issues with sleeping but I feel sleepy. I think it's thanks to you ! I wish you to have the best night ever 😁
Damn, I knoow what you're going through, and to be honest I almost killed my "friend" who said "Oh probably not, I mean, You're never going to do anything sppecial in life anyway."
Playlist like these are really helping me cope with all the bullshit going on in my life right now I’ve been clean for 4 days straight and haven’t starved myself in 2 so I’d just like to thank you for making this.
TW: vent I just want to feel like myself for once. I don't know who I am. My own name feels foreign. My reflection never shows me cause I don't know who I am. Every living moment is either pure ecstasy or absolute nothingness. I don't remember what being me feels like, or if I was ever myself. Nothing I try to help myself works cause I never have the motivation to see it through. I feel like I'm just a burden on my family. I don't have a job, I'm not in uni, I'm gonna be 20 in August and I have nothing to show for what my life has been. I don't have any academic achievements and I can't do anything exceptionally well to study it. And even if I did it doesn't matter cause I'll end up being miserable and alone with a dead end job cause I can't even make a single phone call or else I get panic attacks. Before and after. I just want living to be easier. I just want to know who I am. I just want to know what it feels like to be yourself. I don't pretend to be someone else, but I don't feel. Anything. Too much of the time. Almost all of the time.
Hey you! I know things might seem tough right now and yeah you're right! But I promise things will get better okay? You're important and unique and don't let anyone take you down! I'm sorry if you're stressed. I wish I could take it away from you because you deserve so much and don't need anything to drag you down! Don't let anyone push you down!! Don't listen to any of those negative words about you no matter what it is. Take care of yourself and try to seek help from others! I know it might be hard but it will help you. If you don't have anyone to talk to or vent to you can always talk to me! I'm Beautiful Repeat that I don't have to be perfect Repeat that I can be who I want to be Repeat that I'm important Repeat that I'm special Repeat that 100 reasons why you shouldn't commit suicide: 1. We would miss you. 2. It’s not worth the regret. Either by yourself, if you failed or just simply left scars or the regret everyone else feels by not doing enough to help you. 3. It does get better. Believe it or not, it will eventually get better. Sometimes you have to go through the storm to get to the rainbow. 4. There’s so much you would miss out on doing. 5. There is always a reason to live. It might not be clear right now, but it is always there. 6. So many people care, and it would hurt them if you hurt yourself. 7. You ARE worth it. Don’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you otherwise. 8. You are amazing. 9. A time will come, once you’ve battled the toughest times of your life and are at ease once again, where you will be so glad that you decided to keep on living. You will emerge stronger from this all, and won’t regret your choice to carry on with life. Because things always get better. 10. What about all the things you’ve always wanted to do? What about the things you’ve planned, but never got around to doing? You can’t do them when you’re dead. 11. I love you. Even if only one person loves you, that’s still a reason to stay alive. 12. You won’t be able to listen to music if you die. 13. Killing yourself is never worth it. You’ll hurt both yourself and all the people you care about. 14. There are so many people that would miss you, including me. 15. You’re preventing a future generation, YOUR KIDS, from even being born. 16. How do you think your family would feel? Would it improve their lives if you died? 17. You’re gorgeous, amazing, and to someone you are perfect. 18. Think about your favorite music artist, you’ll never hear their voice again… 19. You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day 20. Listening to incredibly loud music 21. Being alive is just really good. 22. Not being alive is really bad. 23. Finding your soulmate. 24. Red pandas 25. Going to diners at three in the morning. 26. Really soft pillows. 27. Eating pizza in New York City. 28. Proving people wrong with your success. 29. Watching the jerks that doubted you fail at life. 30. Seeing someone trip over a garbage can. 31. Being able to help other people. 32. Bonfires. 33. Sitting on rooftops. 34. Seeing every single country in the world. 35. Going on road trips. 36. You might win the lottery someday. 37. Listening to music on a record player. 38. Going to the top of the Eiffel Tower. 39. Taking really cool pictures. 40. Literally meeting thousands of new people. 41. Hearing crazy stories. 42. Telling crazy stories. 43. Eating ice cream on a hot day. 44. More Harry Potter books could come out, you never know. 45. Traveling to another planet someday. 46. Having an underwater house. 47. Randomly running into your hero on the street. 48. Having your own room at a fancy hotel. 49. Trampolines. 50. Think about your favorite movie, you’ll never watch it again. 51. Think about the feeling of laughing out loud in a public place because your best friend has just sent you an inside joke, 52. Your survival will make the world better, even if it’s for just one person or 20 or 100 or more. 53. People do care. 54. Treehouses 55. Hanging out with your soulmate in a treehouse 56. Snorting when you laugh and not caring who sees 57. I don’t even know you and I love you. 58. I don’t even know you and I care about you. 59. Nobody is going to be like you ever, so embrace your uniqueness! 60. You won’t be here to experience the first cat world emperor. 61. WHAT ABOUT FOOD?! YOU’LL MISS CHOCOLATE 62. Starbucks. 63. Hugs. 64. Stargazing. 65. You have a purpose, and it’s up to you to find out what it is. 66. You’ve changed somebody’s life. 67. You could change the world. 68. You will meet the person that’s perfect for you. 69. You are worth so much 70. If you end your life, you’re stopping yourself from achieving great things. 71. Making snow angels. 72. Making snowmen. 73. Snowball fights. 74. Life is what you make of it. 75. Everybody has talent. 76. Laughing until you cry. 77. Having the ability to be sad means you have the ability to be happy. 78. The world would not be the same if you didn’t exist. 79. It’s possible to turn frowns, upside down 80. Be yourself, don’t take anyone’s shit, and never let them take you alive. 81. Heroes are ordinary people who make themselves extraordinary. Be your own hero. 82. Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections. 83. One day your smile will be real. 84. Having a really hot, relaxing bath after a stressful day. 85. Lying on the grass and laughing at the clouds. 86. Getting completely smashed with your best friends. 87. Eating crazy food. 88. Staying up all night watching your favorite films with a loved one. 89. Sleeping all day. 90. Creating something you’re proud of. 91. You can look back on yourself 70 years later and be proud you didn’t commit suicide. 92. Being able to meet your Internet friends. 93. Tea / Coffee / Hot Chocolate 94. The new season of Sherlock 95. Cuddling under the stars. 96. Being stupid in public because you just can. 97. If you are reading this then you are alive! Is there any more reason to smile? 98. Being able to hug that one person you haven’t seen in years 99. People care enough about you and your future to come up with 100 reasons for you not to do this. 100. But, the final and most important one is, just, being able to experience life. Because even if your life doesn’t seem so great right now, anything could happen. Please remember that your important and to contact somone or talk to someone if your feeling suicidal. Please take care of yourself, eat,drink,brush,wash anything and everything to take care of yourself. If it's night time, remember to put your phone on the charger,make sure you have everything set and try and get some sleep okay? Hopefully the next day will be better and the days after that. If it's the evening it might seem rough right now but I promise they'll get better. Take care of yourself and remember to make time for your hobbies and interests. If it's the morning don't start off with such a bad mood! I know it sucks to have to get up and go to school or work but I promise the day will be good! Don't overwork yourself okay? I love you and you're important! Please take care of yourself and seek help if your feeling suicidal or depression. Remember you're important and there's no one like you! If you ever need to talk to someone you can always talk to me! And please take care of yourself for me And remember it's okay to cry, it's a way of the body letting out it's emotions! Go get some rest dear! And remember your valid
Damn, that hits hard... I mean, I know I shouldn't think of letting go, but... Reading a com from someone I don't even know and saying to myself "Damn... Someone that I don't know care more about me than all my friends put together..." It's just... Ouch... that one really hurts... But I mean, thanks for writing that, I needed it. Thank you ❤️
@@jellyfoxy6498 Thanks its the least I could do! I'm sorry that your friends dont care as much but if you ever need to talk I'm here. Take care of yourself
TW:SH Ya it really is getting bad again I relapsed early this morning i was 168 days clean. It felt so relieving to feel the sharp pain on my skin. Im still angry at myself for doing it but I feel better now. It just felt like that expectation I set for myself was crossed out. It made me feel so shitty. It was good to get it off of me. I'm so surprised I made it that far but I'm so glad its over yk. I just feel better now.
Somtimes failing isnt really failing. I was clean now vor 3 monts but that was the worse time ever.. when i did it again it felt so good. And i felt better. But u got this
Keep going. The cuts dont lost forever and your feeling better for the wrong reasons, talk to someone before a few drops of blood can't help anymore. Don't get like me.
We were bestfriends for 16 years, when the pandemic came and lots of depressing shit went through me, i lost myself completely and just wanted everything to end but i couldnt, and i cut my relationships with literally eveyone, i was such a social butterfly but now i am so numb and running away from people, sleeping most of the day, and my bestfriend tried to get in touch with me but i pushed her again and again that we dont see eachother for a long time, i wish i couldve said that i need help and i am sorry to left her like that :(
You should talk to her l am pretty sure she will understand don’t lost people you care about it’s really hard finding new ones end they’re just not the same especially after quarantine we all change and lost our social abilities maybe things won’t be the same at start but you and you’re friend can get through it and be as happy as you used to be ( English is not my first language sorry if l made a mistake )
It's 6 am, I haven't slept. I slept yesterday night only because I couldn't stay awake since I didn't sleep the day before. It's just a cycle. Everything is unbearable, it keeps getting worse every day, every month, every year. I don't really get what's wrong with me. I don't try to label myself with certain things because I feel like I'm faking it for attention or something. Things like having an eating disorder, insomnia, paranoia, depression, adhd. My family sucks, I feel like my friends suck, I suck, being born a girl sucks. Life absolutely fucking sucks. I'm too much of a coward to end it. Sorry to whoever reads this.
I really feel you but everything will get better slowly ik it sounds cliche but it's just that slowly you will get better believe in yourself , you matter!
You shouldn’t have to feel that way but I feel the same way if you wanna talk about it someone’s always there for you even me a complete stranger but if you wanna talk about it we can Just hang in there
Good. You should never, and I mean NEVER, try killing yourself. Ending your life is never the answer; all it does is cause more pain. I get that life can be hard, trust me, I know, but a suicide attempt will cause the people who care about you to suffer. I know that very feeling of dread because my brother has attempted suicide multiple times and I get extreme anxiety if he doesn't answer when I knock on his door. It's gone as far as to where I've had nightmares about it. It's best to talk it out with someone you can trust to get a therapist if you can. Just don't EVER kill yourself. I'm sorry if I'm coming off as rude to you; this is just my view on suicide. I'm not trying to call you selfish or anything. Just think of this: "Suicide is like attempted murder, and is equally as bad if not worse. Your life matters as well, and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise."
My anger issues had been showing itself alot lately and I've just been yelling at my friends for the stupidest reasons. And bc of that, my anxiety has been acting up bc I'm worried that my friends will leave me. And bc of that, my depression acts up bc I think they're gonna leave me. So I've been hating myself 😃
I get so upset for no reason.. And I hate socializing and communicating to others. And whenever I see my oarents I start panicing or even friends.. As if I was scared of them for no reason.. I havent slept for days cause my mind is scared.. Ive been hallucinating.. And here some things about me I hate yelling. And thenpeople around me yells at me all the time.. Then there are these times.. I feel the urge of kms I feel so empty and its like my life is so meaningless.. Ive been losing friends.. Scared to go out.. I cant even go to restaurants or order or talk to anyone.. Tell me do I have social anxiety and Depression? I need to know.
i hate how people ask, "Why don't you ever tell me anything?!" well I'm sorry mum, I have severe trust issues because I told people my secrets and I ended up in court with people telling me that I'm lying.
This playlist has been a mood lately. Everything in my life feels like it's already at a stand still. I constantly feel like I need to do better and don't feel like I'll ever have the drive and motivation to actually get there. I'm drinking and smoking more and I'm always tired. Just venting so maybe I'll update when it gets better, but shit.
The fact that I had 2 hours of sleep in 4 days is creeping me out. I was hallucinating my biggest fears right in front of me. This playlist describes my situation perfectly. - A sleepless 13 year old :)
honestly i hv like strict parents when i do smt wrong they yell at me when I was younger they would always hit me and my brother but I just thought it. was normal. every time I cry they tell me everyone is going through the same things as me and I should suck it up. when I told them that I was stressed and overwhelmed they would just laugh and say u hv so many things how could you feel that way. now every time I feel shitty and cry I think to myself I don't hv the right to cry I dont hv the right to feel this way everyone goes through it or even worse : )
this actually helped me helped let out all my feelings i cried so hard, thank you alot explanation >>> So i am gonna explain what i mean by this, i had a hard past and when i say hard i mean like a F_CK3D UP PAST. and i never had a parents that would talk to me about my feelings, i always kept my feelings to myself and had a hard time letting them out i still have this problem and i try to help myself not to feel this way, my way is to listen to music or dance to music. it calms me down and helps me let it all out, so if ur confused there you go thanks byee!! - rya.
my friend sent this to me before she ended herself and it stuck with me for a bit but after my recent ex cheated on me and i had to handle with all these doubts and self hate it helps alot
I just got diagnosed with depression and anxiety like last week. I already knew I had it but now it’s official ig. Yesterday was really difficult, I was so tired but couldn’t sleep, I almost relapsed, and I avoided all my friends at school because I just couldn’t fake being happy. I just couldn’t do it and I feel like if I show that I’m sad in front of them I’ll be seen as “bringing the mood down” and “too much” so I just couldn’t be around them, and I couldn’t be happy.
it's currently 4:38 am, I'm lying in my bed and reminiscing on the past. the past when I used to listen to these 24/7 and was so mentally unstable. I'm scared I'm falling back into the old me.
For everyone reading this, please remember that you're not alone and things will get better. I know you might not believe this now, but they can get better! I know you might not see it right now, but I know you are an amazing person, you're just hurt, I know sometimes there are thoughts in our heads that made us think that we 're awfull and not good enough, but please, don't listen to them!!! Don't listen to any voices or anyone that makes you feel horrible and that makes you think you're a monster or that you don't deserve to be loved! Because trust me, you DO deserve to be loved, you deserve to be loved, healthy, you deserve to he happy and alive!!!! Most importantly!!! Have you been eating well? I know it's hard but you deserve food... please don't feel guilty to eat the food you need. And you if you struggle with eating or have an eating disorder, you deserve to be healthy and you're not a weak for asking for help! Wether is related to eating disorders or another mental illnes or physical too, you're not alone and you deserve to be okay!!! It's not a sign of weakness asking for help. Actually, recognizing we need help and trying to ask for it it's a really important step and essential to recovery!!! Repeat with me: these voices in my head are not real and I deserve to feel happy, loved and get the help I need! What are you waiting?? Let's repeat it❤️ I know it's difficult to believe at first, but keep doing it, it can make you feel better! You can also try looking in the mirror, and remember and tell yourself that you are beautiful just the way you are, it doesn't matter if you're skinny, fatty, short or tall, black or white, every single one of you are beautiful just the way you are!❤️ Did you ever realize you're the only one you in the world???Take care of yourself, and don't hurt yourself self, you're skin is not a paper to cut or a stick to burn!! Or anything else, please don't hurt yourself, don't overdose.. please...keep safe...i know I don't know you but I care about you and I love you..if you ever need help, if you're feeling bad, don't hesitate asking for help! I know sometimes we think " oh, but there are other people worse than me, I'm just being dramatic" THAT'S NOT TRUE!!!! EVERYONE DESERVES HELP, WETHER YOU NEED MORE OR LESS, EVERY PAIN IS VALID!❤️ Call your help local hotlines, try therapy..but don't give up..you can do this! You are loved and will find persons thar really love and care about you..
(TW: VENT) Yesterday I had told my old best friend that I had gotten covid, as soon as I did, she started guilt tripping me and saying that It's all my fault if other people get covid because of me, and before I left school early, I had no clue I even had covid, and I hadn't been wearing my mask since it wasn't mandatory and most people weren't wearing them either. I then got into an argument with her, my mom saw that I had told my old best friend something I maybe shouldn't have, and called me an idiot over and over and said that I have such a big mouth. Now everything thing is getting bad again and i'm no longer clean (which I have been for 3 months now), and I realize now that I've been manipulated my entire life now, but I was far too naive to realize it. Honestly this playlist made me feel so much better and it reminds me that I'm not alone and that other people are going thru much worse. (And to anyone that reads this, you are loved and your mistakes don't matter because the past is the past, and there is no going back and changing it
vent sorry. (3:50am-4:03am--3/20/22) ive been crying my eyes out for the past two hours and i cant stop. my nightmares have been back and the worst since 3 years ago. and i told my therapist once and she just told me to get a dream journal. but what's so bad about a nightmare, you may be wondering.? they are reoccurring and other times they stop and i wake up, but when i go to bed that night, it resumes. they are horrid; gory, dreadful. i wake up sweating, hyperventilating, and crying most times. not only are the nightmares back, the one person i've spent so much energy and time trying to get over and ignore is back in my life again and my stupid attachment issues wont let it stop. i cant stop thinking about him and ik he'll never love me again. god why am i stupid? WHY. its all my fault. he left me. how could i be so fucking stupid. he was and is so perfect. no one will ever understand. you dont understand. i need him. i could look at him, make eye contact and either be instantly cheered up from the joy he gives me by existing or i could feel a buttload of GUILT. piercing guilt for what i did. what did i do? you dont really care, ik. i always put him second. i liked two guys. him and his toxic best friend. the perfect one always comforted me for what the toxic one would do for me, but i kept on going back to the toxic one. why. why why why. WHY ME.
I am 14 and just got diagnosed with depression and anxiety a month ago. Gave me meds to sleep and calm my negative emotions down, but the days when I just want to cry and let it all out is gone, it made me numb enough to cry. So all there is, is the pain in my chest, bottled up emotions that is forced to be closed. What a life right?
My arm is full of scars, so i started wearing hoodies. today, my mum asked me to roll up my sleeve and it really made me uncomfortable. its nearly my best friends death anniversary and nearly my birthday. its all this month. the thing i hate about her death is, she died a week before my birthday and her funeral was on the exact same day as my birthday and since then i fell into deep depression. i started hurting myself even more. we knew each other since we were babies as well which hurts even more. i only went to her grave once and i keep telling my dad but he keeps on saying "hes busy with work" or "maybe next time" i still haven't went. my parents called me spoiled and an attention seeker which hurt a lot. my brother got new bed and he didn't like it. my mum still defends my him. i hate how he's older then me because he always tells me what to do and always take his anger on me. i'm sorry, i just wanted to get it off my chest.
Honestly I just wanna get this off my chest, lately it takes all my strength the hold back the sudden attacks of tears, idk, I wake up and wanna cry, I’m just really depressed. I know talking about it might help, which is why I’m here, I don’t wanna like have a full blown convo, just wanna get this off, it’s hard to hold back tears and sadness especially when they catch you off guard, anyway, I hope anyone feeling this way feels better soon, I’m gonna need a little bit longer tho, thanks for reading this far whoever you are, much love.
Heres the thing... i dont wanna actively try to die, though its crossed my mind, but if i happened to die or be on the brink of death, I wouldnt argue. Rn i could care more or less.
I get what you mean I am dealing with the same mindset but I have realized that I simply am not scared of death anymore neither am I opposed I'm just willing to accept what ever comes my way. But if you actively think about death I'm begging you pls seeknout dor help I'm in Therapy and it really helped me pls take care dear :] 💜☔👾
Xinax Pov eh dw about it.. ive been seeking out therapy for months now. Besides these thoughts arent very new to me, all i have to do is find good things in life to anchor me down and ill be set for a bit
Its 12am, I can't sleep or talk to my girlfriend, I'm failing classes and at risk of getting kicked out of my highschool. No matter what I do it is just never good enough. My grades go down more than up, I don't speak to my father anymore because he is mentally abusive, I'mcrying.. I have been SH free for three months but I'm about to crack. Writing this out makes me feel so much better because I know there's people out here that feel the exact same way as I do right now. That feeling when your heart is in agony and you have your mouth hanging open with tears streaming down your face but you can't make any sound. I starve myself and barely eat, I tell my friends I had a big breakfast and skip eating at lunch then tell my mom I ate a lot at school. I think I might do it on my thighs... I don't want to but I'm in so much pain. Does anyone feel this way? Is it normal to feel like this? Thank you for listening to my rant, I'm talking to you, yeah you. The one on the other side of the screen. I may feel like this today and you might too. But I think tomorrow is going to be better for us both.
yes i feel the exact same way. and i can relate to most things you wrote down. i dont know if it is normal, idk anything anymore but i feel u and i hope it gets better for you, me, and everyone else out there who is going through sh*t. im here if u need to talk :)
Everyone else is talking about really depressing stuff while I'm just over here in my corner imagining angsty scenarios of my favorite fictional characters :P
Yep I hate myself. I feel like everyone I talk to is gonna eventually hate me because I’m annoying. I’m traumatized from how people treated me in the past so now I don’t trust anyone and I don’t like who I am.
they say it gets better but it doesn’t, you just get used to it because it happens so often. i’ve been bullied for the last 3 years for not having big enough features, being “too thin” or people just automatically assume i have an ed. i cut my arms and upper legs. it’s a way to feel good… or better. i’ve asked god to take me about 200 times but he won’t bless me with that so now i sit on the bathroom floor crying holding my thighs wishing the sh scars where gone so i could get better.
Lately I've been thinking of ending it alot but there's one person who has convinced me to stay and I call them everyday but this playlist hits hard man
i wanna cry so hard to this but i locked my feelings away since i was a little kid, i haven’t cried for 3 years now. fake crying is just for the people around me to make it look like i’m like every other kid around my age i know people have much worse lives and that i’m very selfish to say this but i like to write
I remember listening to I cant handle change when i was drunk once and it made me feel like i was floating bc i had ear buds in and it just scratched my brain just right :]
I've felt like shit for the last year, but can't be able to build courage to tell those around me how bad I truly am when it comes to my mental health. Hearing my parents and everyone surrounding me say that hating myself is normal at my age crushes me, knowing that if I open up to them they won't take me seriously. Me already cutting myself for a long time's something I hide even though I feel as if they won't be worried if they ever see the bruises, the worst part being that my whole family is supposedly a "perfect" one compared to others given that there doesn't exist any serious problems makes me think that mine are just gonna ruin everything. I'm the family member in both my parents sides who everyone "loves" and feel comfortable talking to, but only if they knew my true self and how I have to pretend around them wouldn't make sense for them. Worst part is that with only being 14 years old, I know it may not be taken seriously and probably can't relate to other's problems, but sometimes, suicide thoughts say otherwise. Here's some random stuff I started writing because not wanting to exist started to hit again, as usual.. (ofc, it's terrible af since I jut wrote whatever came to mind depending on how I was feeling) Everyone knows them as my friends, But I am utterly grateful when I'm not around them. It's not as if they're the wrong ones, But the need of having people close isn't here anymore. All those childish wishes are something others look for, Meanwhile, I hope I never have them. News of someone not on earth anymore, Everyone feeling sorry for what happened. People tend to not want it to occur, Only I exist amongst them. How hard it is to understand others, Here I lie wishing my life was theirs. Not of those in grief, But the ones whose lives have ended.
!!TW VENT!! im so freaking tired of being upset for no reason, im tired of being angry at everyone and anyone, im tired of not feeling like i have a personality. ive been clean for like 3 months because i got taken to another state on a "vacation" to tennesseewhen in reality it was them trying to get me to move there, we ended up staying there for 2 months and i didnt have my phone because before we left they found out about my sh thing and one of my triggers is not being able to talk to my friends however my parents n my moms side think that anxiety, self hate, suicidal thughts, anorexia, insomnia, and panic attacks are better than cutting. i havent cut since. they took me out of school for one mistake and that ruined all of my friendships and made my girlfriend break up with me since i havent had my phone since we got back. i got to go to the field day at my school and had a lot f fun but that made me feel like a shit person because i only hung out with them that once since schl ended. and now that school is over and i still dont have my phone im scared that im gonna have a repeat of last year when i was alone all summer only seeing my parents and siblings and developing a god complex and going to a psych ward for almost hanging myself. if that happens again, if i end up going back to that life, t that mindset, im done there is no possible way i will make myself suffer through all that again. or anyone of my old friends, my god complex RUINED my relationship with them that year. this year i just fixed it said all my sorries and let go of some friendships and now i fucking turned it all to shit again. i always feel so drained from trying to uphold different personalities with different people because that is what makes them happy and it makes them not worry about me. for example one personality, (the one i used at school) was Alex Alex was a funny aggressive mentally unstable gay individual who went by he/him and they/them and was infamous for knowng everyone and not disliking most people. "alex" wore oversized jeans and a oversized hoodie everyday. "alex also had a eating disorder, deppression, anxiety, panic attacks and experienced dissasotiation. Ive taken alex as my main persona because tha was what felt most like me compared to "Alexis" "Alexis" was a girl who was straight, wore leggings and a band tee all the time. alexis had nothing wrong with her mental state. and she hung out with only her blonde group of friends i dont think im either of those nw, i feel like im not even real, like my personality depends on who i hang around. and thats not who i wanna be. i wanna have a consistent attitude with everyone. so there is my vent. Sorry to whoever is reading this :)
For anyone out there starving themselves don't do it. I developed an eating disorder i throw up everything i eat and its awful. I am getting help so dont worry. Please do no starve yourself your beautiful. I know you're going through a very hard time but please don't harm yourself or starve yourself please. You deserve better. Everything is going to get better i know it. Have a wonderful day! Take care.
Hello, i‘ve been reading all of your vent comments and.. I really hope it gets better for you :( I hope you get to know great friends and i hope your family will love you forever I‘m sure it will get better if you don’t give up!
{vent} My friend has a big group of friends but I was one of the first people to ber her friend now she has more and we are drifting apart because she has so many friends they push me away cuz everyone wants to talk to her and i feel so alone i just her to know how bad this hurts me it makes me feel so worthless i already hate my self. I just want her to talk to me...
the worst feeling is wanting to go home when you’re already there i’m a poet, but lately i haven’t been able to write anything. nothing feels good enough and nothing compares to real poetry. i wont read the other comments on the video because it’s too upsetting. so i don’t except anyone to read mine. it’s kind of nice talking into the public void. i just want to be able to write again.
Something random I came up with while listening to this playlist: That’s not fair… she gets all the praise. I did the same thing as her so where’s my attention. That’s not fair… he did nothing so why is he more recognised when I did it all. That’s not fair… I cared for her but she only cares about her self. They use me because I care and I listen and I help and I understand. I understand because I’ve been hurt like that before. Why won’t you care for me like you care for them? How is that fair? I won’t disappear because I don’t want to hurt you yet you’d disappear without thinking about my feelings. That’s not fair… what did I do? This time it is fair. Goodbye forever…
@OnlyOnyx hey please tell me if your still here i would love to talk to you about what ur going through. i’m really proud of you if your still here. good job! and it’s gonna get better there will be something that is gonna show you that your important and you have an important life. and maybe this is gonna help you:)
I’ve been feeling horribly lately. I’ve haven’t been eating much and these stupid kids at school noticed I guess and stare at me during lunch, not to get me to eat more but to intentionally make me feel uncomfortable. Then there are these kids on the bus that keep slapping my thigh, threatening me, assaulting me, and telling me that other kids and them think of me inappropriately and no one will do anything. The only thing other people will do is laugh or call me a tattle tale when I tell the bus driver but not even the bus driver will do anything. I hate school so much. I’ve been purposely making my self throw up so I can stay home because I’m too scared to go to school and my mother won’t let me have a day off for my mental health so I have to pretend it’s my physical health that’s the problem
Thought I was getting somewhere with my life and actually moving through my depression... when my mum decides to compare me to my high school bully who is now in a high level job, has a licence and boyfriend, and how I am none of that and can't keep a job. She says she said it as motivation. Love you mum
I do this just because I need it, I now no one is gonma read it anyways. Everyone is gonna leave me like always, I know that, even when they made promises telling me the love me and that they would never hurt me. They betrayed me in every way, every moment, the lied, they made me hate myself in every way. My best friend never did that, until a few days ago, and damn... that hurted a lot, she lied the past 6 years about everything, she didn't care about my feelings, and then, I was like always, trying to help her. I don't feel like anything now. I have family issues, they think I'm dumb or something and that I don't know, I already saw my siblings yelling with my parents, and even staying more than 1 month in hospital because of hurting themselfs. I hate it, I hate everything by now, I don't even care of myself, I just care about people that I don't even think they are my friends.... Man, I'm just 13, this isn't fair, I was hurting myself since I was 8. I don't even know how to call for help, I just keep smiling, and when they ask me if I'm ok I just say "ofc". This sucks....
l am so sorry to hear that please ask for someones help even if its hard you can get through it and don’t hate yourself l know l have no right to say it cause l hate my self too but we can’t keep living like this we are literally teenagers we are just at the start of our life about your best friend l don’t know what happened but don’t let anyone make you hate or hurt yourself you can live your life without all people but yourself you need show love and respect your own no one matters other than yourself keep that in youre mind (English is not my first language sorry if said something wrong)
@@harley7812 Thank you so much, I wish there were people like you, you made me smile. And, don't worry, everything, like you said, will me okay, everything will get better, thank you again!
Im in a deep state of depression right now you may be too. I wont lie things wont get better unless YOU do something about it. It wont magically get better until YOU do something about it focus on life and also dont resort to drugs or alcohol you make think it helps you forget all the bad things but it only makes you remember themhope this reaches people who need somebody to tell them this
I’ll give you a story :) if not bye bye! ( warning: it has suicidal thoughts or so.) scroll below for it You ran to your room crying, You told yourself “ why me..no one ever cares for me!?” You cried all night to sleep softly. You woke up at 3 AM to a text message You opened it and saw your “ crush🤍” as you open it you saw half of it and cried. As you read it you throw your phone across the room hard as you can as the pain takes over, You sat on the bed crying of pain of everyone leaving you. ( the text said. “ hey, I don’t wanna be friends with you because you liked me it’s kinda gross..) you sat in the corner hugging your knees, crying to the song painfully as you slowly diff to sleep. You woke up at dawn, you look at the window as you see the light shine on you while you open the window slightly. You still remember last night and cried you ran to the bathroom cutting your hair and clothes. You took pills to keep calm ( mostly happy..or dr##s?) you walked out putting new clothes on to school, you wanted to stay home instead so you walked to your parents room and asked nicely. They yelled at you and you slammed the door loudly, you decided to go to “ school” the nerd kid came up to you on the way to school and asked you “ hey, uh...( name ) I wanted to ask you something..and it’s probably something weird “ he mumbled loudly You said “ Uhm...sure yeah what’s up? “ you said awkwardly “ well I kinda lik-“ Your friend pushed you while all your friends walked past you and laughed You hide your cry and got up walking away as you do the nerd ran up to you and hugged you tightly and said “ I understand the pain you’ve been through it’s easy if we both go through it together and face it all “ he smiled gently looking at you You looked back crying into his arms and hugged him back tight as ever like there’s no tomorrow. ( so let’s say I ran out of ideas...but if you have any add some! Have a good day/ night take any rest if needed!😁👋
My anxiety has sucked lately. It’s gotten so bad, I’ve started having anxiety and panic attacks before I’m supposed to go to school and I physically can’t bring myself to go to school, so I’ve just missed like a month of school. I’m trying my hardest, but my parents don’t seem to notice. It’s always “You have so many choices, I wish I was you or had your life. You got it easy.” “You’re stressed? Join the club. Just wait until you get a job.” It’s so fucking stressful and they just don’t even seem to notice. Fuck, can someone just notice my being in pain and actually care about me!? Is, is that too much? Am I asking too much of them? I just want to go to bed and never wake up, but I don’t think I want to die. I don’t even know at this point. But i can’t just kms, I’d feel guilty about hurting the people close to me, my friends. I can’t do that to them. I’m stuck at a crossroads in every aspect of my life. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to do anything. I just want to sleep.
Nothing else then a empty bed and a full dosis of stress and depression in your head Sometimes life just sucks and i know the feeling of getting up and falling back down right after it But you gotta be strong, you gotta be strong for the ones that know you, the ones that love you
Vent: I wonder if I deserve to...live? Really, I am failing on my exams, I had to left my best friends, making sad everyone with my little cry attacks, and making my mother angry with my anger and sadness.
Perfect playlist. Im 13, idk if I have depression, but I like feeling pain. Like, cutting, you know. My mother died 1 year ago. She was only one who was always near. I had no friends. Even if everything will get better, Ill still wanna die cuz Im traumatized af. I go to the therapist, but I still hate myself. I blame myself a lot.
Сейчас мне плохо но я надеюсь смогу однажды наконец: 1) полюбить себя и принять себя со всеми плюсами и минусами 2)не хотеть умереть 3) не чувствовать себя обузой 4) не причинять себе боль 5) перестать быть для всех "спасателем" 6)прислушиваться к себе 7)не корить себя за мелочи 8) не чувствовать вину за все что угодно А теперь то что я уже делаю и горжусь этим : 1) поддерживаю людей которые нуждаются в этом 2) делаю других счасливыми 3)нахожу время на отдых и себя 4)нахожу способы экологично бороться с чувствами 5)могу находить в себе хорошие черты 6) ухаживать за собой 7) признавать и рассказывать о своих проблемах 8) любить свою внешность 9) не терять надежду Ты, да ты! Ты тоже сможешь все в этой жизни! Ты преодобеешь все свои трудности, приобретёшь новые качества. Ты сможешь, я в тебя верю!
so basically everyone's depressed here and hates themselves and ofc I'm here for the same reason although I did find few comments saying that they used to relate to this playlist but now they don't and I'm honestly so happy for them and I hope they continue to do well
I just wanted to mention that the lead singer of McCafferty has been accused of some pretty bad things (from my memory, things like abuse) and multiple people have given evidence for this, so you might not want to support them. I completely understand if you weren't aware of this, of course, I just wanted to let you know.
For the people struggling with depression or anxiety just remember you are not alone you are special not all people are perfect you can get through this please keep going keep going on your life we have lost people in out lives and it's okay to cope for the lost of them i just hope you can get through this i know you've heard this all over again that 'you can find people who can help you' ' you need help' but please i know you feel quite helpless but you tried your best it's not your fault they don't even notice it don't bottle up your emotions please I LOVE YOU IM PROUD OF YOU, YOU DID GREAT, YOU ARE ALWAYS THE BEST, IM HERE FOR YOU, I'LL HELP YOU, YOU ARE ENOUGH
I’ve never actually SH, but I keep thinking about it and it’s getting bad. I have pretty bad mental health but I can’t tell anyone because I can’t express it right, and whenever I do people don’t actially care like they say they will. Don’t feel a need to comment on this or anything, I just wanted to write it somewhere and know that most of the people here are going through similar things.
I’m at the point of my life where I don’t even cry anymore. I just look for an hour at my dark celling at night and hope the pain will stop But it only gets worse
It’s been bad for a while, but I’m only just starting to realize it. I am a young trans man who has denying that fact for the past 6 years (since I found out what trans even was). Recently my mom has been really stressed with her life, her own view on her body, her renewed depression, etc and it’s affecting our whole family along with her. She has started using snarky remarks or even just flat out screaming at me, not so much my dad, but it starting to take a real toll on me and even after telling that I still feel like she doesn’t acknowledge it. As much as I know she loves me I can’t help but see that there is some underlining hate for me. I don’t know if that’s completely true but it feels that way, so I’ve had to seek safety in my dad, as he has been there mentally for me the most. It’s gotten to the point that if my dad isn’t home I decide to hide in my room and wait until my mom yells my name to tell me to do something or gaslight me. I have quite a few trips coming up so I’m excited to have a moments of just me and friends time. As exhausted as I am though I’m concerned that traveling my not be the best idea for me. At this point I’m just hoping that all the dysmorphia, binge eating, and in general struggles with slowly fade away and hopefully won’t make the cut deeper. I really want to change my life I’ve been so trapped in food, trying to escape the place I’m in, and everything else that I feel really unmotivated and I really really wish that I could get better and be happier and be a better person, but that’s really hard right now. I just need a hug and a supportive mother to actually back me up. I think I’ve made it worse by reading a bunch of comics that have triggers that I know make me feel uncomfy and I don’t even know why I did it. I just so caught up in reading that I kept reading and now im here. Venting in a RUclips comment section about how bad I feel rn know that other people are going worse. Someday I will become unapologetically my self and I hope I don’t lose that thought. We have got to keep moving and not get lost in our addictions.
when you say something that looks fine to you but it hurts the other person's feelings when you accidentally hurt somebody you love because you weren't being careful :')
No matter where I go, I never seem to fit in. Like a broken puzzle piece. Unable to connect to those around me. Forced to forever be left out. Never able to truly fulfill my purpose. What good is a Puzzle piece that can't fit into it's place?
it's so ironic that the people who brought me into this world are also the people who make me want to gtfo of this life. it sucks. I always try to be the person they want me to be, but I keep failing because they keep bringing out the worst in me. They call me unspeakable things and just say things as if I'm a stranger to them. They think I'm cold as ice just because I act so rude whenever they say those things to me. I used to cry in front of them whenever they call me that but now I don't want to. I don't know why. I like crying alone now for some reason. I can't even remember when was the last time they comforted me haha. I can't just believe that they're no strangers to me yet they act like one. I hope things will get better soon. Idk what to do otherwise.
My only "friend" that i have keeps insulting the way i spend my day and the way i look. I don't even belive them anymore when they're saying that like me.
timestamps? i think yes.
TIMESTAMPS
------------------------------------------------
00:00 I Can't Handle Change - Roar
3:18 Happy Pills (Slowed, Red Light District cover) - Weathers
7:00 Alligator Skin Boots - McCafferty
9:24 Hadal Ahbek (Slowed + Reverb) - Issam Alnajjar
13:35 listen before i go (Slowed) - Billie Eilish
18:40 Just Take My Wallet - Jack Stauber('s Micropop)
19:58 Experience - Ludovico Einaudi
25:10 Kill Somebody - YUNGBLUD
28:16 Lights Are On - Tom Rosenthal
------------------------------------------------
BRO WHY HAS NO ONE THANKED YOU?! thank you for the timestamps I appricate it!!
Thank you do much
TYSMMMNNNNNN
Thxxxxx so muchhhh!!!!
Thank you❤
My depression has been getting to me lately and so has my anxiety I'm crying in bed at 1 in the morning I enjoyed the playlist but when I "have to wake up" I'm going to be emotionless for like 3 hours heh- anyways loved it so so much
I hope you are feeling better and just know it will get better soon it takes time to heal. I know times are tough but you are strong.and whatever you do don't you ever try to end life
Same
I believe in you guys you can keep going till you'll get better and achieve big goals :)
You are gonna fight that demon that's called depression and anxiety :)
@@mariaselmanllari7884 its nice to know that people like you exist bc my bf and my best friends are like you! Hope you have a good day/night
as someone who has issues with sh and self hate, this playlist hit very hard...
it helped me to get tears out that I've been bottling up
thank you for that
thank you so much
I'm so happy that it helped you It helps me as well pls take care and your not alone my dear :] 💜👾☔
same
i had to make it a 200
I love crying. I have no idea why.
I just love the feeling, and whenever I cry, I cry about e v e r y t h i n g.
I cry for hours, and I end up crying so much that I physically can't cry any more, then I think, "I'm too tired to think about this anymore.." and I fall asleep hungry.
@@ultraviolence2642 same I love crying too, it makes me feel relieved and happy that I'm able to express myself by crying. It makes me so proud of myself?? I think:)
I’m listening to this playlist trying to convince myself to not pick up a knife and hurt myself…I have been “SH free” for 9 days but I’m still starving myself and I never go to sleep before 1:00am I have no energy..
to who ever is reading this, I know this isn’t any of your concern and your probably going through your own stuff but just writing this made me feel better…
Depression sucks but don’t hurt yourself, like the many people who say it because it’s true you will really regret it no matter what happens don’t do it it’s fine to stay up if you can’t fall asleep but just close your eyes and imagine what you want to imagine it could
Be a world with fairy’s or something nobody’s judging you in that world count to 10 breath and remember why your still standing remember you’ll never find wonderland if your not willing to fall :) smile it’s actually proven when you smile you actually feel slightly happier, I personally don’t know what’s happened in your life but keep going please 😊😅
@@catsrulelife6084 thanks hopefully I’ll be able to stop sh soon but just know that your reply just stoped me from cutting so thank you
Hey dear, I'm a stranger but i hope you know that there are people out there who love and care for you, and hurting your sweet body like that wont do any good for yourself or others, I hope you get the help you really deserve
@@pal_mac_ thanks but I could never get help my mom has no money we are practically living off her boyfriend even if I asked her for therapy she probably wouldn’t and I’d be too scared
@@pal_mac_ Had the right idea but worded strangely
i keep thinking about all the shit ive done for people.
snuck out to see them.
invited them into my house even if my house was a mess
bought them food
gave them advice even when i suck at it
listened to them
remembered everything theyve told me or at least tried to
made them laugh when i wasnt feeling it
held my tongue because i knew it would hurt them
took time out of my day to make time for them
cooked them food
defended them even if it hurt me
shes saying im talking shit about her when it was months ago. i was a shitty person months ago, im so tired. ive done so much and its piling up again and again.
i want to leave.
stop being nice, it hurted me too, you start to think you are not good enough..
what im going through right now. it sucks. i hope you feel better. losing a friend sucks
Oi, eu sei que você talvez não entenda oque eu estou escrevendo mas, é eu sei qual é a sensação de não se sentir o suficiente para as pessoas que você ama ou para seus amigos...
É uma das piores coisas que eu já senti..
Espero que você se sinta melhor depois, que entenda que você é sim suficiente...
Enfim, sinto muito se só acabei piorando tudo..
You should start loving yourself because you don't deserve anything bad only good things :) You should love yourself everyday step by step you can do it ! :)
You should keep being nice but don't pour all your energy onto people. Just try to make sure if people are taking advantage of you, if they are, leave them. Being kind to people usually does make you feel better! But don't just pour your heart and soul into it, maybe like a compliment or be that person who someone feels comfortable sharing their problems with, and ect! Try to take care of yourself before taking care of others, your happiness is more important than being there for someone who eventually leaves you or someone who forgets about you, and ect. I really hope you get the help you need; I have a discord if you need anyone to talk to! I hope you can start loving yourself, every little step matters!
HEY!!!! if you're listening to this playlist in the first place, you're probably in a really bad emotional state. if you wanna talk, yell, or just distract yourself, im here for ya. remember, youre loved so much and you deserve only good things. take care
It's currently 2:40 am, and I have a week and a half left of school. I have to finish an essay that was due last Thursday, then wake up tomorrow at 6:40. My room is a hecking mess, and I haven't eaten healthy since who knows when. BUT, I went skating with my friends in the warm spring sun today. I get to start the mountain bike season this upcoming Tuesday. I'm gonna restart this summer and do a complete clean out of my room, maybe paint a mural or two on the walls. I'll attempt reconstructing my broken sleep schedule, and maybe even start working. Too optimistic? Maybe... but it always helps.
Thank you, sometimes it helps to rant into the void of the internet.
Much love, and God protect everyone in this comment section.
Мне так херово, в начале июня я думала что закончила с sh.. Но не тут то было, я уже не режусь а кусаю ногти и губы итд. Мелкие штуки кароче, сейчас когда я это осознаю я рыдаю.. Мне страшно попросить родителей записать меня к психотерапевту. Мне стыдно что на меня будут тратить такие деньги, я понимаю что стыдиться нечего но я ничего не могу с этим пока что поделать. Думаю сказать отцу, он довольно понимающий. Спасибо что дали выговориться, мне стало легче.
Imposter syndrome really does just drain one. I constantly feel like I’m lying or cheating to everyone around me even though I’m not. I feel so fake but it’s never intentional. It’s weird, the thought that people genuinely care about me is such an alien concept like it just doesn’t make sense in my mind and no matter how many times I hear people tell me or I tell myself, it just doesn’t seem true. I’m an artist but I feel like I really don’t deserve the recognition I get. I’m always the one making the jokes and making people laugh in class or in my friend group but I feel like I’m lying to them by acting humorous and silly 24/7 when in fact it feels like my brain is killing itself.
Just a dumb lil brain dump to get it off my chest I suppose. Hope everyone sees happier, warmer days soon
Yeah i fell exact this inside... i'm really the same as you! When people say that my drawings are good or even I am good for them, i tende to not think it is a real cumpliment that they are just going easy on me. Trying to make me feel better... my english sucks sorry!
omg i feel the same way. i thought i was the only one who felt that way and i was so confused to why i am feeling like that but i guess theres more people out there who feel the same :)
I used to always relate to these. I don't anymore.
For anyone lying awake with whatever's on your mind, this is cliché, but it really does get better. I was close to s*icide at one point, and didn't think I was ever going to get better. But here I am today, still struggling from time to time, but *alive.*
Your feelings are valid, and it's good to take time to feel them. Listen to this music, connect to others who are feeling bad if you want. But know that this is not going to last forever. Give yourself the chance to see things change.
I’m listening to this playlist trying to convince myself to not pick up a knife and hurt myself…I have been “SH free” for 9 days but I’m still starving myself and I never go to sleep before 1:00am I have no energy.. I know this isn’t any of your concern and your probably going through your own stuff but just writing this made me feel better…
@@pinkdevil5561 Hey, I'm glad writing it down made you feel better and I don't mind listening. 9 days without SH is a great accomplishment, and I hope you make that 10 days!
Also, small steps are easier. Since you yourself wrote that you're starving yourself and probably should go to bed earlier, I'd suggest starting slowly with that. When you do things you thought you couldn't, like eating an energy bar or going to bed 00:30, that will gradually show your brain that it isn't impossible. Change is rarely something that comes without setbacks, so don't beat yourself up when you make mistakes. Try to be kind to yourself, it's all too easy to forget that.
I believe in you, and I hope you have a good rest of your night ✨
@@AW-xc1xcI didn’t expect you to respond. I was just holding a knife and I stopped myself! I think I’ll be able to make it to 10 day’s and I’m honestly proud of myself even though my life is really hard right now I think I’m slowly coming back to reality. Thank you for responding so quickly and I hope you have a good night too :)
@@pinkdevil5561 No problem, we gotta pat ourselves on the back sometimes! Here's to 10 days and hopefully more to come
Congrats! I feel genuinely proud of you, it must have been so difficult but I'm glad you are alive!
It's like 2PM and I'm listening this playlist and thank you for this!
I hope you are able to let it all go while listening :] 👾☔💜🕷️
@@xinaxpov2121 please don't hate ur self ❤️
Same school bus vibes
TW: SH
This playlist hits home. I’ve starving myself then over indulging then throwing up and the cutting. It’s been a cycle like this since February. I’ve been struggling and recently my father noticed this(before you W dad- He isn’t. He basically ignores me for two weeks then ima sent off to my moms) He was my sh on my thighs I did 3 weeks ago and he questioned me, and told me what you’re therapist think? What your mom think? Stop it. When go home and change your pants so no one notices those. Come on let’s go home, and repeated it until I got to school. He got me self conscious to the point I ended up cutting even more but this time on my stomach. I’m 0 day from sh. I’m not gonna make it. I’m really not
Edit: So. I was able to stop for less than a month but bows it’s 9;54pm on 5/26. I sh again. My dad is gonna kill me.
I'm sending prayers and I hope you get through. Remember, take courage, and be kind.🙏❤
I’m so sorry this happened to u. If u ever want to talk just know ur not alone ❤️❤️❤️
I understand, the worst part of SH is the guilt of relapsing. And also after your parents see your scars, they do nothing. I genuinely don't care about anything anymore, the only thing keeping me alive is god and praying :/
How are you now ? Please keep going 🤍 You are NOT alone and I feel you but I believe in you! You can overcome it try using rubber bands in the hands instead of cutting . Im here anytime for you so you can talk and say anything you want 🤍
@@Elsawidje.mark8 you can do it you can overcome it! You have to believe in you, I believe in you!🤍 For anything you want to talk vent here if you want
why reading strangers comments makes me feel more understood than ever..? Thanks guys, love you
When I was listening to this I kept thinking about the friends I have
I was there for them
I helped them
I fucking got into detention for 5 days after getting into a fight with the person who tried to hurt my friend
But they never showed friendship to me
I was dealing with a lot of suicidal thought, self harm, and I almost killed someone for them
I even asked one of them if I was dead would you care
She said
“Good no one needs another psychopath here”
That hit too hard
Damn... I won't say the same old bullsh*t like "I know what you feel" or anything else. I just want to say that I know what it's like to have fake friends. You're always there for them and they're... Always somewhere else when you need them... But when you tell them that, they just love to get upset and say bullshit like "of course we're friends !" And you're just like, "oh really ? Is that so b*tch ?! And where were you when I lost someone, when my grandma forgot about me and her husband got a gf ? Where were you when I was on that bridge and you didn't answer your God damn phone ?! A f*cking stranger helped me more than you !"...
Sorry I got carried away, but anyway, I just hope it'll get better for you and that you'll find someone that will truly care for you like you'll care for them ! You're a good person, and I really hope it'll get better 'cause you deserve that !
Have the best day or night possible lovely human ❤️
@@jellyfoxy6498 thank you. I hope you get the best sleep tonight and every other night
@@pontevickyya9146 That's so sweet of you ! I have some issues with sleeping but I feel sleepy. I think it's thanks to you ! I wish you to have the best night ever 😁
😁
Damn, I knoow what you're going through, and to be honest I almost killed my "friend" who said "Oh probably not, I mean, You're never going to do anything sppecial in life anyway."
This needs so much more attention! This playlist is so relatable and the songs are so relatable.
You did a good job, Xinax Pov
Thx thx thx you mad my day it neans the world to me
Playlist like these are really helping me cope with all the bullshit going on in my life right now I’ve been clean for 4 days straight and haven’t starved myself in 2 so I’d just like to thank you for making this.
Keep going! You can do this! It's really hard to not do those things, and I'm so proud of you.
TW: vent
I just want to feel like myself for once. I don't know who I am. My own name feels foreign. My reflection never shows me cause I don't know who I am. Every living moment is either pure ecstasy or absolute nothingness. I don't remember what being me feels like, or if I was ever myself. Nothing I try to help myself works cause I never have the motivation to see it through. I feel like I'm just a burden on my family. I don't have a job, I'm not in uni, I'm gonna be 20 in August and I have nothing to show for what my life has been. I don't have any academic achievements and I can't do anything exceptionally well to study it. And even if I did it doesn't matter cause I'll end up being miserable and alone with a dead end job cause I can't even make a single phone call or else I get panic attacks. Before and after. I just want living to be easier. I just want to know who I am. I just want to know what it feels like to be yourself. I don't pretend to be someone else, but I don't feel. Anything. Too much of the time. Almost all of the time.
Feel u brother, but i know u can do this shit
Hey you! I know things might seem tough right now and yeah you're right! But I promise things will get better okay? You're important and unique and don't let anyone take you down! I'm sorry if you're stressed. I wish I could take it away from you because you deserve so much and don't need anything to drag you down! Don't let anyone push you down!! Don't listen to any of those negative words about you no matter what it is. Take care of yourself and try to seek help from others! I know it might be hard but it will help you. If you don't have anyone to talk to or vent to you can always talk to me!
I'm Beautiful Repeat that
I don't have to be perfect Repeat that
I can be who I want to be Repeat that
I'm important Repeat that
I'm special Repeat that
100 reasons why you shouldn't commit suicide:
1. We would miss you.
2. It’s not worth the regret. Either by yourself, if you failed or just simply left scars or the regret everyone else feels by not doing enough to help you.
3. It does get better. Believe it or not, it will eventually get better. Sometimes you have to go through the storm to get to the rainbow.
4. There’s so much you would miss out on doing.
5. There is always a reason to live. It might not be clear right now, but it is always there.
6. So many people care, and it would hurt them if you hurt yourself.
7. You ARE worth it. Don’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you otherwise.
8. You are amazing.
9. A time will come, once you’ve battled the toughest times of your life and are at ease once again, where you will be so glad that you decided to keep on living. You will emerge stronger from this all, and won’t regret your choice to carry on with life. Because things always get better.
10. What about all the things you’ve always wanted to do? What about the things you’ve planned, but never got around to doing? You can’t do them when you’re dead.
11. I love you. Even if only one person loves you, that’s still a reason to stay alive.
12. You won’t be able to listen to music if you die.
13. Killing yourself is never worth it. You’ll hurt both yourself and all the people you care about.
14. There are so many people that would miss you, including me.
15. You’re preventing a future generation, YOUR KIDS, from even being born.
16. How do you think your family would feel? Would it improve their lives if you died?
17. You’re gorgeous, amazing, and to someone you are perfect.
18. Think about your favorite music artist, you’ll never hear their voice again…
19. You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day
20. Listening to incredibly loud music
21. Being alive is just really good.
22. Not being alive is really bad.
23. Finding your soulmate.
24. Red pandas
25. Going to diners at three in the morning.
26. Really soft pillows.
27. Eating pizza in New York City.
28. Proving people wrong with your success.
29. Watching the jerks that doubted you fail at life.
30. Seeing someone trip over a garbage can.
31. Being able to help other people.
32. Bonfires.
33. Sitting on rooftops.
34. Seeing every single country in the world.
35. Going on road trips.
36. You might win the lottery someday.
37. Listening to music on a record player.
38. Going to the top of the Eiffel Tower.
39. Taking really cool pictures.
40. Literally meeting thousands of new people.
41. Hearing crazy stories.
42. Telling crazy stories.
43. Eating ice cream on a hot day.
44. More Harry Potter books could come out, you never know.
45. Traveling to another planet someday.
46. Having an underwater house.
47. Randomly running into your hero on the street.
48. Having your own room at a fancy hotel.
49. Trampolines.
50. Think about your favorite movie, you’ll never watch it again.
51. Think about the feeling of laughing out loud in a public place because your best friend has just sent you an inside joke,
52. Your survival will make the world better, even if it’s for just one person or 20 or 100 or more.
53. People do care.
54. Treehouses
55. Hanging out with your soulmate in a treehouse
56. Snorting when you laugh and not caring who sees
57. I don’t even know you and I love you.
58. I don’t even know you and I care about you.
59. Nobody is going to be like you ever, so embrace your uniqueness!
60. You won’t be here to experience the first cat world emperor.
61. WHAT ABOUT FOOD?! YOU’LL MISS CHOCOLATE
62. Starbucks.
63. Hugs.
64. Stargazing.
65. You have a purpose, and it’s up to you to find out what it is.
66. You’ve changed somebody’s life.
67. You could change the world.
68. You will meet the person that’s perfect for you.
69. You are worth so much
70. If you end your life, you’re stopping yourself from achieving great things.
71. Making snow angels.
72. Making snowmen.
73. Snowball fights.
74. Life is what you make of it.
75. Everybody has talent.
76. Laughing until you cry.
77. Having the ability to be sad means you have the ability to be happy.
78. The world would not be the same if you didn’t exist.
79. It’s possible to turn frowns, upside down
80. Be yourself, don’t take anyone’s shit, and never let them take you alive.
81. Heroes are ordinary people who make themselves extraordinary. Be your own hero.
82. Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.
83. One day your smile will be real.
84. Having a really hot, relaxing bath after a stressful day.
85. Lying on the grass and laughing at the clouds.
86. Getting completely smashed with your best friends.
87. Eating crazy food.
88. Staying up all night watching your favorite films with a loved one.
89. Sleeping all day.
90. Creating something you’re proud of.
91. You can look back on yourself 70 years later and be proud you didn’t commit suicide.
92. Being able to meet your Internet friends.
93. Tea / Coffee / Hot Chocolate
94. The new season of Sherlock
95. Cuddling under the stars.
96. Being stupid in public because you just can.
97. If you are reading this then you are alive! Is there any more reason to smile?
98. Being able to hug that one person you haven’t seen in years
99. People care enough about you and your future to come up with 100 reasons for you not to do this.
100. But, the final and most important one is, just, being able to experience life. Because even if your life doesn’t seem so great right now, anything could happen.
Please remember that your important and to contact somone or talk to someone if your feeling suicidal. Please take care of yourself, eat,drink,brush,wash anything and everything to take care of yourself.
If it's night time, remember to put your phone on the charger,make sure you have everything set and try and get some sleep okay? Hopefully the next day will be better and the days after that.
If it's the evening it might seem rough right now but I promise they'll get better. Take care of yourself and remember to make time for your hobbies and interests.
If it's the morning don't start off with such a bad mood! I know it sucks to have to get up and go to school or work but I promise the day will be good! Don't overwork yourself okay?
I love you and you're important! Please take care of yourself and seek help if your feeling suicidal or depression. Remember you're important and there's no one like you! If you ever need to talk to someone you can always talk to me! And please take care of yourself for me And remember it's okay to cry, it's a way of the body letting out it's emotions!
Go get some rest dear! And remember your valid
Wow this is really amazing thank you you helped a lot of people
@@xinaxpov2121 Your welcome! I know a lot of people go through tough times so its the least I could do!
Damn, that hits hard... I mean, I know I shouldn't think of letting go, but... Reading a com from someone I don't even know and saying to myself "Damn... Someone that I don't know care more about me than all my friends put together..." It's just... Ouch... that one really hurts...
But I mean, thanks for writing that, I needed it. Thank you ❤️
@@jellyfoxy6498 Thanks its the least I could do! I'm sorry that your friends dont care as much but if you ever need to talk I'm here. Take care of yourself
This could help me sometimes, but just not today.
TW:SH
Ya it really is getting bad again I relapsed early this morning i was 168 days clean. It felt so relieving to feel the sharp pain on my skin. Im still angry at myself for doing it but I feel better now. It just felt like that expectation I set for myself was crossed out. It made me feel so shitty. It was good to get it off of me. I'm so surprised I made it that far but I'm so glad its over yk. I just feel better now.
Somtimes failing isnt really failing. I was clean now vor 3 monts but that was the worse time ever.. when i did it again it felt so good. And i felt better. But u got this
Keep going. The cuts dont lost forever and your feeling better for the wrong reasons, talk to someone before a few drops of blood can't help anymore. Don't get like me.
@@SonderMoth09 but those few drops of blood->>>>
We were bestfriends for 16 years, when the pandemic came and lots of depressing shit went through me, i lost myself completely and just wanted everything to end but i couldnt, and i cut my relationships with literally eveyone, i was such a social butterfly but now i am so numb and running away from people, sleeping most of the day, and my bestfriend tried to get in touch with me but i pushed her again and again that we dont see eachother for a long time, i wish i couldve said that i need help and i am sorry to left her like that :(
You should talk to her l am pretty sure she will understand don’t lost people you care about it’s really hard finding new ones end they’re just not the same especially after quarantine we all change and lost our social abilities maybe things won’t be the same at start but you and you’re friend can get through it and be as happy as you used to be ( English is not my first language sorry if l made a mistake )
It's 6 am, I haven't slept. I slept yesterday night only because I couldn't stay awake since I didn't sleep the day before. It's just a cycle.
Everything is unbearable, it keeps getting worse every day, every month, every year. I don't really get what's wrong with me. I don't try to label myself with certain things because I feel like I'm faking it for attention or something.
Things like having an eating disorder, insomnia, paranoia, depression, adhd.
My family sucks, I feel like my friends suck, I suck, being born a girl sucks. Life absolutely fucking sucks.
I'm too much of a coward to end it.
Sorry to whoever reads this.
you got okay keep trying even if its hard ok i cant promise this will work but but try pls
I really feel you but everything will get better slowly ik it sounds cliche but it's just that slowly you will get better believe in yourself , you matter!
You shouldn’t have to feel that way but I feel the same way if you wanna talk about it someone’s always there for you even me a complete stranger but if you wanna talk about it we can Just hang in there
i feel u. it really sucks.
Good. You should never, and I mean NEVER, try killing yourself. Ending your life is never the answer; all it does is cause more pain. I get that life can be hard, trust me, I know, but a suicide attempt will cause the people who care about you to suffer. I know that very feeling of dread because my brother has attempted suicide multiple times and I get extreme anxiety if he doesn't answer when I knock on his door. It's gone as far as to where I've had nightmares about it. It's best to talk it out with someone you can trust to get a therapist if you can. Just don't EVER kill yourself.
I'm sorry if I'm coming off as rude to you; this is just my view on suicide. I'm not trying to call you selfish or anything. Just think of this: "Suicide is like attempted murder, and is equally as bad if not worse. Your life matters as well, and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise."
My anger issues had been showing itself alot lately and I've just been yelling at my friends for the stupidest reasons. And bc of that, my anxiety has been acting up bc I'm worried that my friends will leave me. And bc of that, my depression acts up bc I think they're gonna leave me. So I've been hating myself 😃
I get so upset for no reason..
And I hate socializing and communicating to others.
And whenever I see my oarents I start panicing or even friends..
As if I was scared of them for no reason..
I havent slept for days cause my mind is scared..
Ive been hallucinating..
And here some things about me
I hate yelling.
And thenpeople around me yells at me all the time..
Then there are these times..
I feel the urge of kms
I feel so empty and its like my life is so meaningless..
Ive been losing friends..
Scared to go out..
I cant even go to restaurants or order or talk to anyone..
Tell me do I have social anxiety and Depression?
I need to know.
Its currently 4am and I'm listening to this while crying. Its really helping me thank you for making this playlist
i hate how people ask, "Why don't you ever tell me anything?!"
well I'm sorry mum, I have severe trust issues because I told people my secrets and I ended up in court with people telling me that I'm lying.
This playlist has been a mood lately. Everything in my life feels like it's already at a stand still. I constantly feel like I need to do better and don't feel like I'll ever have the drive and motivation to actually get there. I'm drinking and smoking more and I'm always tired. Just venting so maybe I'll update when it gets better, but shit.
Cheers to the madness from one mess to another. Lets take things day by day.
RUclips is to smart every time pick a playlist like this it gives an ad for a therapy app 😐
Thx for listening I hope you enjoyed and feel free to follow for more :] and tell me what you would like to see next
The fact that I had 2 hours of sleep in 4 days is creeping me out. I was hallucinating my biggest fears right in front of me. This playlist describes my situation perfectly.
- A sleepless 13 year old :)
i hope you r okay
honestly i hv like strict parents when i do smt wrong they yell at me when I was younger they would always hit me and my brother but I just thought it. was normal. every time I cry they tell me everyone is going through the same things as me and I should suck it up. when I told them that I was stressed and overwhelmed they would just laugh and say u hv so many things how could you feel that way. now every time I feel shitty and cry I think to myself I don't hv the right to cry I dont hv the right to feel this way everyone goes through it or even worse : )
this actually helped me helped let out all my feelings
i cried so hard, thank you alot
explanation >>> So i am gonna explain what i mean by this, i had a hard past and when i say hard i mean like a F_CK3D UP PAST. and i never had a parents that would talk to me about my feelings, i always kept my feelings to myself and had a hard time letting them out i still have this problem and i try to help myself not to feel this way, my way is to listen to music or dance to music. it calms me down and helps me let it all out, so if ur confused there you go thanks byee!! - rya.
my friend sent this to me before she ended herself and it stuck with me for a bit but after my recent ex cheated on me and i had to handle with all these doubts and self hate it helps alot
Pray for you and your friends family ❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏
I just got diagnosed with depression and anxiety like last week. I already knew I had it but now it’s official ig. Yesterday was really difficult, I was so tired but couldn’t sleep, I almost relapsed, and I avoided all my friends at school because I just couldn’t fake being happy. I just couldn’t do it and I feel like if I show that I’m sad in front of them I’ll be seen as “bringing the mood down” and “too much” so I just couldn’t be around them, and I couldn’t be happy.
it's currently 4:38 am, I'm lying in my bed and reminiscing on the past. the past when I used to listen to these 24/7 and was so mentally unstable. I'm scared I'm falling back into the old me.
This reminds me of how I felt In 7th grade and how I'm feeling all those emotions all over again right now (8th grade , going into freshmen year)
I've been so numb lately to anything and found this playlist and it is 3:00 am. Need something to listen to and so far enjoy this playlist
For everyone reading this, please remember that you're not alone and things will get better. I know you might not believe this now, but they can get better! I know you might not see it right now, but I know you are an amazing person, you're just hurt, I know sometimes there are thoughts in our heads that made us think that we 're awfull and not good enough, but please, don't listen to them!!! Don't listen to any voices or anyone that makes you feel horrible and that makes you think you're a monster or that you don't deserve to be loved! Because trust me, you DO deserve to be loved, you deserve to be loved, healthy, you deserve to he happy and alive!!!! Most importantly!!! Have you been eating well? I know it's hard but you deserve food... please don't feel guilty to eat the food you need. And you if you struggle with eating or have an eating disorder, you deserve to be healthy and you're not a weak for asking for help! Wether is related to eating disorders or another mental illnes or physical too, you're not alone and you deserve to be okay!!! It's not a sign of weakness asking for help. Actually, recognizing we need help and trying to ask for it it's a really important step and essential to recovery!!! Repeat with me: these voices in my head are not real and I deserve to feel happy, loved and get the help I need!
What are you waiting?? Let's repeat it❤️
I know it's difficult to believe at first, but keep doing it, it can make you feel better! You can also try looking in the mirror, and remember and tell yourself that you are beautiful just the way you are, it doesn't matter if you're skinny, fatty, short or tall, black or white, every single one of you are beautiful just the way you are!❤️ Did you ever realize you're the only one you in the world???Take care of yourself, and don't hurt yourself self, you're skin is not a paper to cut or a stick to burn!! Or anything else, please don't hurt yourself, don't overdose.. please...keep safe...i know I don't know you but I care about you and I love you..if you ever need help, if you're feeling bad, don't hesitate asking for help! I know sometimes we think " oh, but there are other people worse than me, I'm just being dramatic" THAT'S NOT TRUE!!!! EVERYONE DESERVES HELP, WETHER YOU NEED MORE OR LESS, EVERY PAIN IS VALID!❤️ Call your help local hotlines, try therapy..but don't give up..you can do this! You are loved and will find persons thar really love and care about you..
(TW: VENT) Yesterday I had told my old best friend that I had gotten covid, as soon as I did, she started guilt tripping me and saying that It's all my fault if other people get covid because of me, and before I left school early, I had no clue I even had covid, and I hadn't been wearing my mask since it wasn't mandatory and most people weren't wearing them either. I then got into an argument with her, my mom saw that I had told my old best friend something I maybe shouldn't have, and called me an idiot over and over and said that I have such a big mouth. Now everything thing is getting bad again and i'm no longer clean (which I have been for 3 months now), and I realize now that I've been manipulated my entire life now, but I was far too naive to realize it. Honestly this playlist made me feel so much better and it reminds me that I'm not alone and that other people are going thru much worse. (And to anyone that reads this, you are loved and your mistakes don't matter because the past is the past, and there is no going back and changing it
vent sorry. (3:50am-4:03am--3/20/22)
ive been crying my eyes out for the past two hours and i cant stop. my nightmares have been back and the worst since 3 years ago. and i told my therapist once and she just told me to get a dream journal. but what's so bad about a nightmare, you may be wondering.? they are reoccurring and other times they stop and i wake up, but when i go to bed that night, it resumes. they are horrid; gory, dreadful. i wake up sweating, hyperventilating, and crying most times.
not only are the nightmares back, the one person i've spent so much energy and time trying to get over and ignore is back in my life again and my stupid attachment issues wont let it stop. i cant stop thinking about him and ik he'll never love me again. god why am i stupid? WHY. its all my fault. he left me. how could i be so fucking stupid. he was and is so perfect. no one will ever understand. you dont understand. i need him. i could look at him, make eye contact and either be instantly cheered up from the joy he gives me by existing or i could feel a buttload of GUILT. piercing guilt for what i did. what did i do? you dont really care, ik. i always put him second. i liked two guys. him and his toxic best friend. the perfect one always comforted me for what the toxic one would do for me, but i kept on going back to the toxic one. why. why why why. WHY ME.
I am 14 and just got diagnosed with depression and anxiety a month ago. Gave me meds to sleep and calm my negative emotions down, but the days when I just want to cry and let it all out is gone, it made me numb enough to cry. So all there is, is the pain in my chest, bottled up emotions that is forced to be closed. What a life right?
My arm is full of scars, so i started wearing hoodies. today, my mum asked me to roll up my sleeve and it really made me uncomfortable. its nearly my best friends death anniversary and nearly my birthday. its all this month. the thing i hate about her death is, she died a week before my birthday and her funeral was on the exact same day as my birthday and since then i fell into deep depression. i started hurting myself even more. we knew each other since we were babies as well which hurts even more. i only went to her grave once and i keep telling my dad but he keeps on saying "hes busy with work" or "maybe next time" i still haven't went. my parents called me spoiled and an attention seeker which hurt a lot. my brother got new bed and he didn't like it. my mum still defends my him. i hate how he's older then me because he always tells me what to do and always take his anger on me.
i'm sorry, i just wanted to get it off my chest.
Honestly I just wanna get this off my chest, lately it takes all my strength the hold back the sudden attacks of tears, idk, I wake up and wanna cry, I’m just really depressed. I know talking about it might help, which is why I’m here, I don’t wanna like have a full blown convo, just wanna get this off, it’s hard to hold back tears and sadness especially when they catch you off guard, anyway, I hope anyone feeling this way feels better soon, I’m gonna need a little bit longer tho, thanks for reading this far whoever you are, much love.
Heres the thing... i dont wanna actively try to die, though its crossed my mind, but if i happened to die or be on the brink of death, I wouldnt argue. Rn i could care more or less.
I get what you mean I am dealing with the same mindset but I have realized that I simply am not scared of death anymore neither am I opposed I'm just willing to accept what ever comes my way. But if you actively think about death I'm begging you pls seeknout dor help I'm in Therapy and it really helped me pls take care dear :] 💜☔👾
Xinax Pov eh dw about it.. ive been seeking out therapy for months now. Besides these thoughts arent very new to me, all i have to do is find good things in life to anchor me down and ill be set for a bit
@@lakeride1331 your very strong and I'm glad you found help so pls take vare and have a nice day :] ☔👾🕷️💜
Xinax Pov thank you ur rlly kind also nice playlist ima try to fall asleep listenin to it rn-
you ever just like- minding ur own business, the one of your friends grabs THAT spot on you arm
and you just try not to cry
it hits different when u sleep with mom dad and listen songs, cant even cry.
Its 12am, I can't sleep or talk to my girlfriend, I'm failing classes and at risk of getting kicked out of my highschool. No matter what I do it is just never good enough. My grades go down more than up, I don't speak to my father anymore because he is mentally abusive, I'mcrying.. I have been SH free for three months but I'm about to crack. Writing this out makes me feel so much better because I know there's people out here that feel the exact same way as I do right now. That feeling when your heart is in agony and you have your mouth hanging open with tears streaming down your face but you can't make any sound. I starve myself and barely eat, I tell my friends I had a big breakfast and skip eating at lunch then tell my mom I ate a lot at school. I think I might do it on my thighs... I don't want to but I'm in so much pain. Does anyone feel this way? Is it normal to feel like this? Thank you for listening to my rant, I'm talking to you, yeah you. The one on the other side of the screen. I may feel like this today and you might too. But I think tomorrow is going to be better for us both.
yes i feel the exact same way. and i can relate to most things you wrote down. i dont know if it is normal, idk anything anymore but i feel u and i hope it gets better for you, me, and everyone else out there who is going through sh*t. im here if u need to talk :)
Don't worry you are not alone
This playlist just motivated me to do my school works 😃 nice playlist keep it up!!❤️
Everyone else is talking about really depressing stuff while I'm just over here in my corner imagining angsty scenarios of my favorite fictional characters :P
Thank you love (like in a friend way lol) this really helped me express some feelings I had bottled up. I hope to listen to your music again
I found this while literally searching for vent playlists at 3:00 am- what a coincidence 🤔
great playlist btw
Yep I hate myself. I feel like everyone I talk to is gonna eventually hate me because I’m annoying. I’m traumatized from how people treated me in the past so now I don’t trust anyone and I don’t like who I am.
they say it gets better but it doesn’t, you just get used to it because it happens so often. i’ve been bullied for the last 3 years for not having big enough features, being “too thin” or people just automatically assume i have an ed. i cut my arms and upper legs. it’s a way to feel good… or better. i’ve asked god to take me about 200 times but he won’t bless me with that so now i sit on the bathroom floor crying holding my thighs wishing the sh scars where gone so i could get better.
Lately I've been thinking of ending it alot but there's one person who has convinced me to stay and I call them everyday but this playlist hits hard man
i wanna cry so hard to this but i locked my feelings away since i was a little kid, i haven’t cried for 3 years now. fake crying is just for the people around me to make it look like i’m like every other kid around my age
i know people have much worse lives and that i’m very selfish to say this but i like to write
I remember listening to I cant handle change when i was drunk once and it made me feel like i was floating bc i had ear buds in and it just scratched my brain just right :]
I've felt like shit for the last year, but can't be able to build courage to tell those around me how bad I truly am when it comes to my mental health. Hearing my parents and everyone surrounding me say that hating myself is normal at my age crushes me, knowing that if I open up to them they won't take me seriously. Me already cutting myself for a long time's something I hide even though I feel as if they won't be worried if they ever see the bruises, the worst part being that my whole family is supposedly a "perfect" one compared to others given that there doesn't exist any serious problems makes me think that mine are just gonna ruin everything. I'm the family member in both my parents sides who everyone "loves" and feel comfortable talking to, but only if they knew my true self and how I have to pretend around them wouldn't make sense for them. Worst part is that with only being 14 years old, I know it may not be taken seriously and probably can't relate to other's problems, but sometimes, suicide thoughts say otherwise.
Here's some random stuff I started writing because not wanting to exist started to hit again, as usual..
(ofc, it's terrible af since I jut wrote whatever came to mind depending on how I was feeling)
Everyone knows them as my friends,
But I am utterly grateful when I'm not around them.
It's not as if they're the wrong ones,
But the need of having people close isn't here anymore.
All those childish wishes are something others look for,
Meanwhile, I hope I never have them.
News of someone not on earth anymore,
Everyone feeling sorry for what happened.
People tend to not want it to occur,
Only I exist amongst them.
How hard it is to understand others,
Here I lie wishing my life was theirs.
Not of those in grief,
But the ones whose lives have ended.
!!TW VENT!!
im so freaking tired of being upset for no reason, im tired of being angry at everyone and anyone, im tired of not feeling like i have a personality.
ive been clean for like 3 months because i got taken to another state on a "vacation" to tennesseewhen in reality it was them trying to get me to move there, we ended up staying there for 2 months and i didnt have my phone because before we left they found out about my sh thing and one of my triggers is not being able to talk to my friends however my parents n my moms side think that anxiety, self hate, suicidal thughts, anorexia, insomnia, and panic attacks are better than cutting. i havent cut since. they took me out of school for one mistake and that ruined all of my friendships and made my girlfriend break up with me since i havent had my phone since we got back. i got to go to the field day at my school and had a lot f fun but that made me feel like a shit person because i only hung out with them that once since schl ended. and now that school is over and i still dont have my phone im scared that im gonna have a repeat of last year when i was alone all summer only seeing my parents and siblings and developing a god complex and going to a psych ward for almost hanging myself. if that happens again, if i end up going back to that life, t that mindset,
im done
there is no possible way i will make myself suffer through all that again. or anyone of my old friends, my god complex RUINED my relationship with them that year. this year i just fixed it said all my sorries and let go of some friendships and now i fucking turned it all to shit again.
i always feel so drained from trying to uphold different personalities with different people because that is what makes them happy and it makes them not worry about me. for example one personality, (the one i used at school) was Alex
Alex was a funny aggressive mentally unstable gay individual who went by he/him and they/them and was infamous for knowng everyone and not disliking most people. "alex" wore oversized jeans and a oversized hoodie everyday. "alex also had a eating disorder, deppression, anxiety, panic attacks and experienced dissasotiation.
Ive taken alex as my main persona because tha was what felt most like me compared to "Alexis"
"Alexis" was a girl who was straight, wore leggings and a band tee all the time. alexis had nothing wrong with her mental state. and she hung out with only her blonde group of friends
i dont think im either of those nw, i feel like im not even real, like my personality depends on who i hang around. and thats not who i wanna be. i wanna have a consistent attitude with everyone.
so there is my vent. Sorry to whoever is reading this :)
For anyone out there starving themselves don't do it. I developed an eating disorder i throw up everything i eat and its awful. I am getting help so dont worry. Please do no starve yourself your beautiful. I know you're going through a very hard time but please don't harm yourself or starve yourself please. You deserve better. Everything is going to get better i know it. Have a wonderful day! Take care.
When im sad i just take a deep breath and clam down but this this has to be my favorite playlist this made me cry
Im glad you enjoyed it thx for the support :] 👾💀🕷️☔
Hello, i‘ve been reading all of your vent comments and..
I really hope it gets better for you :(
I hope you get to know great friends and i hope your family will love you forever
I‘m sure it will get better if you don’t give up!
Me: trying to let out all of my frustrations with this playlist.
Ad: Cover girl mascara plumps up your eyelashes.
{vent}
My friend has a big group of friends but I was one of the first people to ber her friend now she has more and we are drifting apart because she has so many friends they push me away cuz everyone wants to talk to her and i feel so alone i just her to know how bad this hurts me it makes me feel so worthless i already hate my self. I just want her to talk to me...
the worst feeling is wanting to go home when you’re already there
i’m a poet, but lately i haven’t been able to write anything. nothing feels good enough and nothing compares to real poetry. i wont read the other comments on the video because it’s too upsetting. so i don’t except anyone to read mine. it’s kind of nice talking into the public void. i just want to be able to write again.
This really helps me get it all out I think I need to be perfect for everyone my anxiety takes over me and I can’t handle anything strong
Something random I came up with while listening to this playlist:
That’s not fair… she gets all the praise. I did the same thing as her so where’s my attention. That’s not fair… he did nothing so why is he more recognised when I did it all. That’s not fair… I cared for her but she only cares about her self. They use me because I care and I listen and I help and I understand. I understand because I’ve been hurt like that before. Why won’t you care for me like you care for them? How is that fair? I won’t disappear because I don’t want to hurt you yet you’d disappear without thinking about my feelings. That’s not fair… what did I do? This time it is fair. Goodbye forever…
@OnlyOnyx hey please tell me if your still here i would love to talk to you about what ur going through. i’m really proud of you if your still here. good job! and it’s gonna get better there will be something that is gonna show you that your important and you have an important life. and maybe this is gonna help you:)
I’ve been feeling horribly lately. I’ve haven’t been eating much and these stupid kids at school noticed I guess and stare at me during lunch, not to get me to eat more but to intentionally make me feel uncomfortable. Then there are these kids on the bus that keep slapping my thigh, threatening me, assaulting me, and telling me that other kids and them think of me inappropriately and no one will do anything. The only thing other people will do is laugh or call me a tattle tale when I tell the bus driver but not even the bus driver will do anything. I hate school so much. I’ve been purposely making my self throw up so I can stay home because I’m too scared to go to school and my mother won’t let me have a day off for my mental health so I have to pretend it’s my physical health that’s the problem
It's currently 3:01 AM while listening to this
I hope you enjoy it but make sure to get some sleep and make sure your okay :] take care 👾💜☔🕷️
Thought I was getting somewhere with my life and actually moving through my depression... when my mum decides to compare me to my high school bully who is now in a high level job, has a licence and boyfriend, and how I am none of that and can't keep a job.
She says she said it as motivation.
Love you mum
I do this just because I need it, I now no one is gonma read it anyways.
Everyone is gonna leave me like always, I know that, even when they made promises telling me the love me and that they would never hurt me. They betrayed me in every way, every moment, the lied, they made me hate myself in every way. My best friend never did that, until a few days ago, and damn... that hurted a lot, she lied the past 6 years about everything, she didn't care about my feelings, and then, I was like always, trying to help her. I don't feel like anything now. I have family issues, they think I'm dumb or something and that I don't know, I already saw my siblings yelling with my parents, and even staying more than 1 month in hospital because of hurting themselfs. I hate it, I hate everything by now, I don't even care of myself, I just care about people that I don't even think they are my friends.... Man, I'm just 13, this isn't fair, I was hurting myself since I was 8. I don't even know how to call for help, I just keep smiling, and when they ask me if I'm ok I just say "ofc". This sucks....
l am so sorry to hear that please ask for someones help even if its hard you can get through it and don’t hate yourself l know l have no right to say it cause l hate my self too but we can’t keep living like this we are literally teenagers we are just at the start of our life about your best friend l don’t know what happened but don’t let anyone make you hate or hurt yourself you can live your life without all people but yourself you need show love and respect your own no one matters other than yourself keep that in youre mind
(English is not my first language sorry if said something wrong)
@@harley7812 Thank you so much, I wish there were people like you, you made me smile. And, don't worry, everything, like you said, will me okay, everything will get better, thank you again!
@@Tsuzumii your welcome and l am glad that l could make you smile 💜
i feel the same way :( it really sucks.
Im in a deep state of depression right now you may be too. I wont lie things wont get better unless YOU do something about it. It wont magically get better until YOU do something about it focus on life and also dont resort to drugs or alcohol you make think it helps you forget all the bad things but it only makes you remember themhope this reaches people who need somebody to tell them this
Someone sent me a taco on the floor… it really made me upset thanks for the playlist
Wow, this is the first time i actually listened to this at 3 am
Take care
I’ll give you a story :) if not bye bye! ( warning: it has suicidal thoughts or so.)
scroll below for it
You ran to your room crying, You told yourself “ why me..no one ever cares for me!?”
You cried all night to sleep softly. You woke up at 3 AM to a text message
You opened it and saw your “ crush🤍” as you open it you saw half of it and cried. As you read it you throw your phone across the room hard as you can as the pain takes over,
You sat on the bed crying of pain of everyone leaving you.
( the text said. “ hey, I don’t wanna be friends with you because you liked me it’s kinda gross..) you sat in the corner hugging your knees, crying to the song painfully as you slowly diff to sleep. You woke up at dawn, you look at the window as you see the light shine on you while you open the window slightly. You still remember last night and cried you ran to the bathroom cutting your hair and clothes. You took pills to keep calm ( mostly happy..or dr##s?) you walked out putting new clothes on to school, you wanted to stay home instead so you walked to your parents room and asked nicely. They yelled at you and you slammed the door loudly, you decided to go to “ school” the nerd kid came up to you on the way to school and asked you “ hey, uh...( name ) I wanted to ask you something..and it’s probably something weird “ he mumbled loudly
You said “ Uhm...sure yeah what’s up? “ you said awkwardly
“ well I kinda lik-“
Your friend pushed you while all your friends walked past you and laughed
You hide your cry and got up walking away as you do the nerd ran up to you and hugged you tightly and said
“ I understand the pain you’ve been through it’s easy if we both go through it together and face it all “ he smiled gently looking at you
You looked back crying into his arms and hugged him back tight as ever like there’s no tomorrow.
( so let’s say I ran out of ideas...but if you have any add some! Have a good day/ night take any rest if needed!😁👋
crying
My anxiety has sucked lately. It’s gotten so bad, I’ve started having anxiety and panic attacks before I’m supposed to go to school and I physically can’t bring myself to go to school, so I’ve just missed like a month of school. I’m trying my hardest, but my parents don’t seem to notice. It’s always “You have so many choices, I wish I was you or had your life. You got it easy.” “You’re stressed? Join the club. Just wait until you get a job.” It’s so fucking stressful and they just don’t even seem to notice. Fuck, can someone just notice my being in pain and actually care about me!? Is, is that too much? Am I asking too much of them? I just want to go to bed and never wake up, but I don’t think I want to die. I don’t even know at this point. But i can’t just kms, I’d feel guilty about hurting the people close to me, my friends. I can’t do that to them. I’m stuck at a crossroads in every aspect of my life. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to do anything. I just want to sleep.
Its 4pm and Idk why but it feel so good to hear this Playlist
Nothing else then a empty bed and a full dosis of stress and depression in your head
Sometimes life just sucks and i know the feeling of getting up and falling back down right after it
But you gotta be strong, you gotta be strong for the ones that know you, the ones that love you
I love this playlist, And I just subscribed
Thank you sooo much
@@xinaxpov2121 Anytime! :D
Vent:
I wonder if I deserve to...live? Really, I am failing on my exams, I had to left my best friends, making sad everyone with my little cry attacks, and making my mother angry with my anger and sadness.
Perfect playlist. Im 13, idk if I have depression, but I like feeling pain. Like, cutting, you know. My mother died 1 year ago. She was only one who was always near. I had no friends. Even if everything will get better, Ill still wanna die cuz Im traumatized af. I go to the therapist, but I still hate myself. I blame myself a lot.
Сейчас мне плохо но я надеюсь смогу однажды наконец:
1) полюбить себя и принять себя со всеми плюсами и минусами
2)не хотеть умереть
3) не чувствовать себя обузой
4) не причинять себе боль
5) перестать быть для всех "спасателем"
6)прислушиваться к себе
7)не корить себя за мелочи
8) не чувствовать вину за все что угодно
А теперь то что я уже делаю и горжусь этим :
1) поддерживаю людей которые нуждаются в этом
2) делаю других счасливыми
3)нахожу время на отдых и себя
4)нахожу способы экологично бороться с чувствами
5)могу находить в себе хорошие черты
6) ухаживать за собой
7) признавать и рассказывать о своих проблемах
8) любить свою внешность
9) не терять надежду
Ты, да ты! Ты тоже сможешь все в этой жизни! Ты преодобеешь все свои трудности, приобретёшь новые качества. Ты сможешь, я в тебя верю!
so basically everyone's depressed here and hates themselves and ofc I'm here for the same reason although I did find few comments saying that they used to relate to this playlist but now they don't and I'm honestly so happy for them and I hope they continue to do well
I can’t help but repeat myself
i know it’s not your fault,
still lately i began to shake for no reason at all..
I’ve cried so much that,
The tears won’t come out anymore.
I just wanted to mention that the lead singer of McCafferty has been accused of some pretty bad things (from my memory, things like abuse) and multiple people have given evidence for this, so you might not want to support them. I completely understand if you weren't aware of this, of course, I just wanted to let you know.
POV It's 3 AM and you have the sudden realization that everybody hates you and that you'll never be good enough
For the people struggling with depression or anxiety just remember you are not alone you are special not all people are perfect you can get through this please keep going keep going on your life we have lost people in out lives and it's okay to cope for the lost of them i just hope you can get through this i know you've heard this all over again that 'you can find people who can help you' ' you need help' but please i know you feel quite helpless but you tried your best it's not your fault they don't even notice it don't bottle up your emotions please I LOVE YOU IM PROUD OF YOU, YOU DID GREAT, YOU ARE ALWAYS THE BEST, IM HERE FOR YOU, I'LL HELP YOU, YOU ARE ENOUGH
Found this at exactly 3:30am. Needed this one
I’ve never actually SH, but I keep thinking about it and it’s getting bad. I have pretty bad mental health but I can’t tell anyone because I can’t express it right, and whenever I do people don’t actially care like they say they will.
Don’t feel a need to comment on this or anything, I just wanted to write it somewhere and know that most of the people here are going through similar things.
when i clicked on this i got an ad for finding a therapist💀
Love this playlist!!!
Thx Your comment made my day :]
I'm glad you enjoyed feel free to check out my other works 💜🖤
@@xinaxpov2121 of course!
Depression got me quick.
but why is the title is relatable af-
POV: it’s actually 3:27am
Good morning
Good evening
Or night
It's 5am
What a great playlist :) :
This playlist actually hits harder than my dad :D
fr
*casually listens while making vent art*
Also as someone who struggles with sh and my apperence physically , I really appreciate this playlist
I’m at the point of my life where I don’t even cry anymore. I just look for an hour at my dark celling at night and hope the pain will stop
But it only gets worse
It’s been bad for a while, but I’m only just starting to realize it. I am a young trans man who has denying that fact for the past 6 years (since I found out what trans even was). Recently my mom has been really stressed with her life, her own view on her body, her renewed depression, etc and it’s affecting our whole family along with her. She has started using snarky remarks or even just flat out screaming at me, not so much my dad, but it starting to take a real toll on me and even after telling that I still feel like she doesn’t acknowledge it. As much as I know she loves me I can’t help but see that there is some underlining hate for me. I don’t know if that’s completely true but it feels that way, so I’ve had to seek safety in my dad, as he has been there mentally for me the most. It’s gotten to the point that if my dad isn’t home I decide to hide in my room and wait until my mom yells my name to tell me to do something or gaslight me. I have quite a few trips coming up so I’m excited to have a moments of just me and friends time. As exhausted as I am though I’m concerned that traveling my not be the best idea for me. At this point I’m just hoping that all the dysmorphia, binge eating, and in general struggles with slowly fade away and hopefully won’t make the cut deeper. I really want to change my life I’ve been so trapped in food, trying to escape the place I’m in, and everything else that I feel really unmotivated and I really really wish that I could get better and be happier and be a better person, but that’s really hard right now. I just need a hug and a supportive mother to actually back me up. I think I’ve made it worse by reading a bunch of comics that have triggers that I know make me feel uncomfy and I don’t even know why I did it. I just so caught up in reading that I kept reading and now im here. Venting in a RUclips comment section about how bad I feel rn know that other people are going worse. Someday I will become unapologetically my self and I hope I don’t lose that thought. We have got to keep moving and not get lost in our addictions.
when you say something that looks fine to you but it hurts the other person's feelings
when you accidentally hurt somebody you love because you weren't being careful :')
No matter where I go, I never seem to fit in.
Like a broken puzzle piece.
Unable to connect to those around me.
Forced to forever be left out.
Never able to truly fulfill my purpose.
What good is a Puzzle piece that can't fit into it's place?
it's so ironic that the people who brought me into this world are also the people who make me want to gtfo of this life. it sucks. I always try to be the person they want me to be, but I keep failing because they keep bringing out the worst in me. They call me unspeakable things and just say things as if I'm a stranger to them. They think I'm cold as ice just because I act so rude whenever they say those things to me. I used to cry in front of them whenever they call me that but now I don't want to. I don't know why. I like crying alone now for some reason. I can't even remember when was the last time they comforted me haha. I can't just believe that they're no strangers to me yet they act like one. I hope things will get better soon. Idk what to do otherwise.
My only "friend" that i have keeps insulting the way i spend my day and the way i look. I don't even belive them anymore when they're saying that like me.