I remember very well when I had that feeling of he is gone forever and much like you I was very happy to be who and where I was today. My X whom I am very good friends with today told me I killed the man she loved. That was painful to hear but I still wouldn't change anything to be who I am today. When I talk at University or Colleges about the transition I use the term I am the sum of all my experiences. "He" allowed me to survive and nurtured me to become who I am today. I do love and thank him for caring for me until I could stand on my own as the woman that I am today. He was a good man. I would often stand looking in the mirror in the bathroom staring at this girl smiling back at me. Yes it was hard to tell who I was before. But, at the end before I did the final surgeries, there looking in her eyes I could see his sad eyes looking back at me telling me it is time for me to go, so that I may rest now. I will forever keep him in my heart grateful for the gift of allowing me to be whole finally. This video brought all that emotion crashing back around me again. Thanx for sharing, Jenna
Jenna08848 Thank you for the comment Jenna, the part about looking into your eyes and saying goodbye nearly bought a tear to my eye... I like the person I used to be and despite feeling so happy and complete now, I still occaisionally feel a sense of loss that I had to let go of who I was, and that he is no longer here... sure so much of who I was is still present in me, and as more time passes by I realise that I am growing more into the female me, and that feels good :) But still it can make me feel a little philosophical and sad at times.
Jenna08848 I've been going back through Charlie's vids ( oo - creepy !) but this one really struck me. I've been thinking a lot about this topic and feeling like the feelings weren't valid - but of course they are. Sometimes it's hard to accept that ... but hey *shrug* what isn't weird about all this? :D
something that strikes me about your videos is how much think about the meaning of your life and your actions in life. Your are an incredibly attractive woman not only because you are physically beautiful and your voice is very beautiful but your mind and your thoughts are amazing . Your thoughts about life and the meaning of things in life are incredibly interesting and intrigueing and in fact make me think a lot about life as well. I think you would be an incredibly in teresting woman to spend time with because there is so much that you know and think about. You are fascinating and engaging
Thank you for this and all you post and posted. I would love to talk in person but ai know that is unlikely. I am at year four and some things are still new.
I've never seen a trans person be so kind to their former self; or be so genuine about how tricky it is to go from a male view of the world, to a female viewpoint. You more often than not exude a real positivity that many trans people can only dream of !!
Looking great Christina, it´s wonderful to see your happy face! So many things going on at once, hang in there! All the best with the next steps in surgery...and what was that about the racing season???!!!! Do you pilot?
Thanks :) It all went well on Monday, a little bit sore but really happy - will post a video soon about! Yes I race a car (for 8 years now), it's a great hobby and very exciting. Will send you a link to my other RUclips racing page :D
I also feel like I've "killed off" the old me, but good riddance. The old me was a miserable son of a bitch! Looking back, I'm annoyed at myself for not doing all of this sooner. I wish I had been more secure in who I was as a woman at a much earlier age. I think it's taken me quite some time to really find out who I am without all of the pretending to be someone else. it is an odd thing. Perhaps I'm being selfish, but I feel like it's my business and mine alone whether that old person exists on this earth. That's how I feel now. Maybe I'll feel different later in life.
Charlie you are so cute, you are a beautiful girl, I love your videos, I love cars too ,I have a Corvette. I am trans. My wife know it. but I have to hide it if I wanna stay married so keep up the videos. She is getting better. But she doesn’t want to see it.
I wonder if that's the hardest thing to grapple with as a trans woman. Guys advances and your fear with having to tell a guy that you actually want to pursue and whatnot.
It wouldn't be fun if you were lesbian. I can't wait for FFS but I could do without male flirtation. Why don't you try dating girls again or did your transition cause you to lose interest?
I remember very well when I had that feeling of he is gone forever and much like you I was very happy to be who and where I was today. My X whom I am very good friends with today told me I killed the man she loved. That was painful to hear but I still wouldn't change anything to be who I am today. When I talk at University or Colleges about the transition I use the term I am the sum of all my experiences. "He" allowed me to survive and nurtured me to become who I am today. I do love and thank him for caring for me until I could stand on my own as the woman that I am today. He was a good man. I would often stand looking in the mirror in the bathroom staring at this girl smiling back at me. Yes it was hard to tell who I was before. But, at the end before I did the final surgeries, there looking in her eyes I could see his sad eyes looking back at me telling me it is time for me to go, so that I may rest now. I will forever keep him in my heart grateful for the gift of allowing me to be whole finally. This video brought all that emotion crashing back around me again. Thanx for sharing, Jenna
Jenna08848 Thank you for the comment Jenna, the part about looking into your eyes and saying goodbye nearly bought a tear to my eye... I like the person I used to be and despite feeling so happy and complete now, I still occaisionally feel a sense of loss that I had to let go of who I was, and that he is no longer here... sure so much of who I was is still present in me, and as more time passes by I realise that I am growing more into the female me, and that feels good :) But still it can make me feel a little philosophical and sad at times.
Agreed and I do get a teared up when I remember that moment looking in the mirror, every time I am reminded
Jenna08848 I've been going back through Charlie's vids ( oo - creepy !) but this one really struck me. I've been thinking a lot about this topic and feeling like the feelings weren't valid - but of course they are. Sometimes it's hard to accept that ... but hey *shrug* what isn't weird about all this? :D
You look wonderful! Naturally beautiful! Your attitude is just as amazing. Youve made a big step along the road to your dreams!!!
something that strikes me about your videos is how much think about the meaning of your life and your actions in life. Your are an incredibly attractive woman not only because you are physically beautiful and your voice is very beautiful but your mind and your thoughts are amazing . Your thoughts about life and the meaning of things in life are incredibly interesting and intrigueing and in fact make me think a lot about life as well. I think you would be an incredibly in teresting woman to spend time with because there is so much that you know and think about. You are fascinating and engaging
thank you, you cheer me up. I have soo far to go. I have waited so late.again thank you
I like who you've become, hope you're glad you let the girl out. You're lovely.
You look fabulous! Good luck tomorrow!!!
Thank you for this and all you post and posted. I would love to talk in person but ai know that is unlikely. I am at year four and some things are still new.
can't wait for your next vid! stay sweet.
Thank you for sharing.
I've never seen a trans person be so kind to their former self; or be so genuine about how tricky it is to go from a male view of the world, to a female viewpoint. You more often than not exude a real positivity that many trans people can only dream of !!
Looking great Christina, it´s wonderful to see your happy face! So many things going on at once, hang in there! All the best with the next steps in surgery...and what was that about the racing season???!!!! Do you pilot?
Thanks :) It all went well on Monday, a little bit sore but really happy - will post a video soon about! Yes I race a car (for 8 years now), it's a great hobby and very exciting. Will send you a link to my other RUclips racing page :D
a Girl for all seasons Speechless, I admire you so much! Showing us that dreams can be reached on all levels!
I also feel like I've "killed off" the old me, but good riddance. The old me was a miserable son of a bitch! Looking back, I'm annoyed at myself for not doing all of this sooner. I wish I had been more secure in who I was as a woman at a much earlier age. I think it's taken me quite some time to really find out who I am without all of the pretending to be someone else. it is an odd thing. Perhaps I'm being selfish, but I feel like it's my business and mine alone whether that old person exists on this earth. That's how I feel now. Maybe I'll feel different later in life.
good look for Monday xx
Candles help bring back old secret laguanes
Yeast too
Oh black paint let me get that off
Who was your surgeon?
Charlie you are so cute, you are a beautiful girl, I love your videos, I love cars too ,I have a Corvette. I am trans. My wife know it. but I have to hide it if I wanna stay married so keep up the videos. She is getting better. But she doesn’t want to see it.
She's nice
I know the mirror
We don't you black black darkest black bang bang I bought boots there in colorado springs
You are her now , so go forward and don't look back.
I hope your breast come out super pretty.
Kisses Ainsley
Oh you go out with guys at grotto
Air hockey 🏑
BTW its obvious why guys flirt with you. Dont see it as a challenge! x
I luv u
Im the bomb 💣
I bring nukelar
I wonder if that's the hardest thing to grapple with as a trans woman. Guys advances and your fear with having to tell a guy that you actually want to pursue and whatnot.
Germany there with sue
can I have your surgeon place thnx.
Heineken
I live you soo eroupe is where it's at
I love germans we lost 1,000,000
It wouldn't be fun if you were lesbian. I can't wait for FFS but I could do without male flirtation.
Why don't you try dating girls again or did your transition cause you to lose interest?
We're but bombs
Hey baby girl, boobs make me smile, but the true worth of a person isn't measured by how they look, but by the love in their soul.
You know your laguanes come back in the mirror 🪞 10 launges