Confront and using words, over and over like most women do, do not work with men. You know what does work? Actions! Calm, confident, sovereign actions. It ends up being a win/win instead of feeling of one-down.
I dated my future husband for 7 years starting at age 16. I always initiated EVERYTHING. Once just to test it I didn't call him for 2 weeks and he never called me, I finally called him and he is like "Hey! How are you!!" For some reason I stayed and agreed to marry him. Marriage was the same, me initiating everything, making all decisions. I divorced him 15 years later. I just can't believe I stayed with him that long, put up with it that long. SMH
My ex married someone because she initiated everything & he just went along with it because he thought that’s life. I value my life too much to be in that mindset. Some guys just want to be with anyone & don’t figure out what they actually want.
I’m sorry you had to go through this! I dated a man that made me initiate 60% of the time then it kept dropping to 70% and lower. He always spoke about marriage (keeping me on a hook) so I stopped initiating to see what he does. FIVE DAYS went by with no text or calls but I caught him commenting under hot girl pics online. I sent him a breakup letter and went no contact with him. He got mad but honestly I can’t see myself marrying a man that is okay not talking or even checking up on me for five days. I love him. Until now my heart hurts and I get an urge to go back to him but I know he isn’t the one for me. He was emotionally unavailable.
In my experience, internalizing the rejection (e.g. the thought that as an option, I'm not good enough) actually made me work harder to get said prize. I never understood how being dismissed or undervalued by a man would actuality motivate me to ignore these signs and try even harder until I started therapy and learned that I was seeking a trauma bond, not the individual (daddy issues ladies!) All that to say, when we heal, and figure out why we tolerate what we tolerate, it's easier to spot these signs, and even easier to anchor dead weight.
oh stephan.....after over 2 months of no contact, my decision, he calls out of the blue "needing help with an official situation" i, like a nut, don't stop, think, consider or anything....i say yes, regret it immediately the next day and the "dinner" we were to have 2 days later after of course not hearing from him for 2 days i conveniently ignore....im empowered by your talks...so, i did something i don't like to do...i simply blocked his number...he is a negative influence in my life, a distraction to the way i want to live my life in Christ and overall just someone i really don't want around my life.....thanks for the good work you put out...DON'T STOP.....
I have been one of those women and Im not ashamed to say it because I am a good woman. But, victim no longer! I have reformed myself in life; giving every sector a major overhaul with God's help. Im single and Im okay with that! I had to learn how to spend time with me and had to learn how to appreciate and delight myself in the things about me and what I can do. Trust me when I say that there's no better moment. Being a woman who have been through hell in relationships, I realized why must I continue to do that? And its sad that it took me this long to realize that, those men didnt deserve me, didnt deserve my attention, my love, my patience not even that, of my virtue. Iam alone for a reason! The right guy will make himself known. Im not worrying about it! Im working on me and Im just fine! Im enjoying being Santeria. Just me, myself, and I.
We made plans to see each other on Valentines Day and he ghosted me. No messages no call no show. He reached out two days later and acted like nothing was wrong said he had a lot going on. Haven’t heard from him since 😕
@@maryanneville4397that'snot a "man" thing hun. That's a very specific thing from a person who has zero respect for someone. That has nothing to do with Mars don't do that.
I'm not sure if I'm in a situationship or not. He says he wants to go slow but for me it feels the actions are fast. We spend a lot of time together, both sexual and non sexual - dinners, comedy clubs, gym, fun runs, spa etc. We message everyday, he initiates more than I do. He even calls in the evenings (and a couple of times has called me in the mornings). He's not seeing anyone else, he's not even on dating apps. He's taken time off work to help me, he called me on xmas for 3 hours, we've gone away together on a weekend, he celebrates my achievements and we have great conversation. He got me really thoughtful xmas presents, he came over and fixed my bed and my boiler...and that's just off the top of my head. Yet he tells me he's not ready for a relationship - and it's been almost 6 months. I'm freaked out as it wouldn't be my first situationship but I feel like we are in a relationship and he just seems to not want to acknowledge it and I can't understand what's holding him back?
Sounds like he's really not sure about you. It's time to make yourself less available to him before he takes you for granted. Tell him your looking for a committment and start dating other men. If he's afraid of losing you, he will it up and get serious, if not ....there's your answer.
I just experienced this with someone I knew and was friends with for over 20 years. Dating became difficult for me and I had to go my own way. These signs are a good wake up call. Thank you for this Stephen
Stephan Speaks amd Sadia Khan....if amyone can get these two to have a sit down together and talk about relationships, that would be the icing on my cake🍰
@MeetStephanSpeaks, I've been subbed for a very long time and I listen to your posts on a daily basis. This experience has happened to me more than once (situationships/relationships), I've confronted them about this same issue, and I've come to the realization that I will no longer waste my time with a man that doesn't want to put their 100% into the relationship as I always reciprocate. So I will patiently wait until my "Boaz" finally meets my "Ruth". No time for games in 2024 and beyond, it's not worth it. Thank you for your insightful posts, and blessings to you and all viewers!!! #knowmyworth#happilysingleuntil#selfloveisthebestlove#patientlywaiting 💖☝🏾👏🏾✊🏾💯
Stephan, I’m SO GLAD you touched on the “decent/good”guy who treats you well and addresses issues but still won’t commit. It’s a strange, confusing area to be in. I recently found myself caught up in a situation like that and left but it was HARD and there aren’t many videos about it. He wanted to be “exclusive” and even got STD tested for me but just couldn’t commit. He gave tons of time, initiated, added to my life and seemed to do all the right things but just couldn’t take it any further. My heart was starting to be invested and I had to step it back.
@@Adriana.Gabriela being exclusively sleeping with each other and being in an official committed relationship where he actually claims you are two different things. But both have expiration dates. Acting as though and giving the benefits of a relationship while not actually being in something defined and structured is a slippery slope. Be careful-don’t get caught up in the situationship trap! 💗
@@burgundymustard3811 I'm not sure what you re saying here by him claiming you. You ennumerated things that he does do, which make for a commited relationship. Are you saying he doesn't want to be seen with you in public or tells his friends you're not together or what?
I’m in a mixed messages situation and many of the points you are hitting is hurting my heart… damn 🤦🏽♀️ he initiates sometimes doesn’t ask questions about me and minimizes time I think I’ve wasted a year 😢
@@MeetStephanSpeaks I hope pray he does… I see a good man but hurt and unemotionally unavailable on the surface. I’ve learned men hurt differently but as a women I can’t wait for someone to heal or don’t want to heal while building in the process.
Thank you Stephanie for your wisdom, yet again! I am very attracted to a man, there seems to be chemistry, yet we are nearly 2 hours apart. We met once with both meeting an hour from our cities. From there, I’m initiating the effort and understanding and accepting he is busy with his work, he could still answer texts and give alternatives to plans i suggest. Just don’t see it, and knowing my value and worth as a potentially great partner, I kindly suggested we move on. He took it as I was being “negative” towards hi. I see that as being a victim. Red flag!! Moving on, gratefully.
My bf always want me to come over and he is always hungry, i feel like it is more about the sex, he never discusses the future and he is saying thats just how he is and communication is the key
I really needed this video today Stephan…I’ve been in a “situationship” with a man like the example in this video for going on 3 years and I have literally experienced all 4 things discussed in this video…but for the past 3 months I’ve had a new man come in the picture and he is applying all the pressure and he is really trying to be serious with me…but I don’t feel comfortable just “ghosting” Mr. Situationship…I’m confused…this did give me some more insight on what to do.
Girl u sound like you're in 2 situationships which really is awful at our age. 3 months is a long time and years is WAY too long to not be serious. Grow up put on your grown WOMAN panties. You're allowing yourself to be an option for BOTH of these men.
Send him a letter kindly stating you enjoyed your time together but it won’t work out and after you sent it go no contact and block him from everywhere. That’s what I did when I realized I was also in a situationship and he was using me as a placeholder. Drop him and move on!! That letter is closure for him.
I cannot thank you enough for creating this. It reached me right when I needed it the most. Much gratitude from India. 🙏🌸 Can you please also elaborate on what can a woman do in the case where she sees all these signs but still feels in her heart that there can be so much potentially more to him and the relationship, how can she go from “being an option” to “being the one” then ?
I will not be chasing anyone's love, regardless of whether it's romantic or not. They can be reciprocal with me or no relationship. Nope I will not be the initiator ever again. I don't care who you are, what your excuses, what you're doing, no one is ever too busy for someone they truly desire and truly unconditionally love. People who always say they're too busy or make up excuses, they aren't the one for you. They do not want to put the time and effort and be reciprocal with your love. Then I say the best thing to do is let them go because they ain't for you.. Thank you for your relationship advice, not just for men, but for women, and for mutual beneficial relationships. Because if two people can't work together with it it ain't going to work a relationship to really blossom cannot be one-sided.
Too many women give way too much too soon only to be disappointed and yes wasting their time. Women, please live in reality and don't lie to yourself that it is more than what it is. Stop making this easy for these men.tbey hardly have to do anything to get royalty treatment change this narrative! Xo ❤ we are worth it we deserve much more
I love your realness, it doesn’t hurt either. As a woman that’s made mistakes in her past. I have no regrets, you helped me get out of something. Are you doing any events in the Bay Area any time soon?
I've told him how I feel, poured my heart and soul...no show to correct anything. So adios...I'll put my time and energy into someone who does have time for me...😊
If you can't decide who you want to be in my life then I will decide on your behalf! I am nobody's appliance or resource. Also, you don't have what it takes to be committed. I have told the truth.
and here I am thinking about my teacher again (we're both in our early thirties), he only initiates talking to me when he thinks I need help, but he seems kinda nervous around me and he seems to be blushing when we're talking, but since he's pretty passive I'm just really confused and I can't read him at all, that's pretty much the story of my life, I hope God has a man in store for me who doesn't just make me confused and frustrated almost all the time.
I can’t wait to leave ..I’m working on a lot of crap before I bounce ..and then I’ve tried with others because he’s not loyal anyway.Im just going to stay single.God didn’t give me a kitty clicker for nothing 🤷♀️.I had and have kids and grandkids .Im good .As soon as my youngest gets that license I’m done !Il be working on getting a job ,moving out,working out ,kick boxing ,lifting and swimming.🤷♀️.Im going to do me .Save up to go to real estate school.
No one should be an option! If a partner is not a priority why is their a partnership!?? Love , Honesty, Respect & Communication! ❤️🙏Trust God to give strength!
But then why marry just because she's there. If the one you love loves you truly then he should marry the second not the first. You live your life only once. Don't throw away your chance of real love.
I am a very busy woman working a full time job and a part time job. I had a man to tell me i am a very busy woman. When i sit back and look at yes i am. I guess i dont have time for a relationship right now i am focusing on myself. I dont know if this a bad thing or good thing.
Thats true He says he loves me n he committed to me But then dun call me once in 2 months or hear my voicenote nor picks my call Leave all my msgs on seen N when i confronted him He went silent n now ghosting me lol I'm on no contact with him now
It's important for women to get as many "suitors' as she can if it's come to the point where he doesn't get serious, stop sleeping with the guy if that's the case, and date other men. ( But don't give them sex).
Eve was deceived not Adam...thank you for helping me see it. Grateful..and not mad at him..not going to villainize but learn. Between the lines of what you said..he is not making promises or commitments. Thank you so much
Can you make a video about living together before marriage is it a bad idea? Please, I am currently in this situation and I’m starting to regret agreeing to it.
11:25 He signs everything. With love....and is focuced on my health, homes comfort ..but its time i I need...he has much work ...work....im so confused....and it makes me anxious...he tells me we were destined to be together...
A man with one of the flaws Stephan just stated is okay. But you are just an option to him if he gives you PLENTY of crumbs. Best to dump the yahoo immediately and watch his head spin lol. No one should settle for a casual relationship anyway! 😳
Hey, Stephan, I gotta call you out. All if your responses to people's comments is *the same* We are sharing our hearts with you. I'd rather you not "comment" than have someone copy and paste the same thing over and over. Please stop! If you can't individualize the resoonse, stop!
What are your thoughts on a man that initially thought that he wasn't going to be serious about a woman and then after experiencing getting to know her wanting to be totally in? What would that look like?
I experienced this before. He initially said he had no time for a relationship but after a couple of months of us just building a friendship he started spending nights at my house, taking off work to spend days with me, we went on dates and when I wanted to take a step back due to personal reasons, he really tried to convince me to give us a chance. He now only reaches out to me 2-3 times a year but I do sometimes wish things were back to how they were.
I wish you could do thing on twin flames. Because I'm in a really bad situation with a twin flame who keeps telling me he desires me, wants me, is going to physically come to me, but he never does. They say that twin flame relationships are different than regular relationships, but I'm not buying that. I think if somebody really desires you and wants you regardless, they're a twin flame, soulmate, kindred spirit, karmic partner, a regular boyfriend, husband, whatever whoever they are, if they really if a man truly desires you, he will put the effort time into you physically and you will have no doubt that he's into you. If you're doubting if a man's into you and he's not putting the time and effort, then he ain't the one for you. That is my new philosophy regardless whoever it is. From now on this point in my life, I will not be taking any more time and effort for action towards anybody who cannot be reciprocal with my love. ❤❤
I don't have to let go for the universe to pave the way to new opportunities........ literally just opened my door and new neighbor just stared down my soul😂😂😂 i even get smiles while I'm driving.......but o how I still want him. Yes new phases open and this one closed but the passion lingers. I wont be an option to him ever again though. My demons wanted his demons to imprint my soul and thats all that was. Lust and passion can be blinding. I dont let my emotions dictate my behavior but not having real sex in so long has psychological effects. My mind is blanking out too as im watching this. I like listening to you. And o f n no. Im not gonna forget his violation! Last time we hung out he said hes kn dating apps meanwhile last summer he denies me a night swim at a water fall with a bottle of whiskey saying he doesn't want me to get romantic feelings 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. I went from Brooklyn socialite to hermit up in fhe woods he has no clue how good he could have had it cause all i literally needed from him was for him to show me his heart, then lots of good sex. I don't like people in my space to much cause i love solitude. Whatever im babbling as im listening.
Why I get attention only from men who are needy and sees me as the last chance? Or men aestetical really below mine? Or manipulators and narcs? It is because after our 40's games are done?
Do you have a video on defining if a guy really likes you or is desperate? I feel especially with these dating apps it is hard to determine who is desperate vs. interested.
What is your opinion on men not having monogamous relationships? I've been into watching a few podcasts regarding relationships recently and there's this one specific individual who claims that men can't be monogamous and he himself is in an exclusive relationship with a woman and claims he loves her however he is sleeping with other women (and his woman is aware of this and tolerates it).
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When it comes to mixed signals/mixed messages, take it as a "no" and move on.
Do this when a man sends you mixed signals 👉ruclips.net/video/q1YQKbtb1xA/видео.html
What? Only women do that ... because they are emotional. 😂
@@zerodeconduite804 Only women take mixed signals as a "no" and a sign to move on? From past experience I disagree
I absolutely agree. Mixed signals is a NO! If they are serious they will express it in their own way,,, but you’ll know where you stand.
So true
Ghosting your texts and getting mad when you confront his bad behavior. Those are some good things to add.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Confront and using words, over and over like most women do, do not work with men. You know what does work? Actions! Calm, confident, sovereign actions. It ends up being a win/win instead of feeling of one-down.
@@Sunlightsam24 I am very much aware, thank you.
@@Sunlightsam24I am very much aware, thank you.
Confronting the bad behavior and becomes defensive! Yea! I hit a nerve I see!
Ladies, make him an option before you become one 👍🏼
I could care less he can keep it moving. I'm good he's not the one God wants me with anyway
Thank you for your feedback. I appreciate hearing from you ❤️ 🙏🏼
It's "couldn't care less" but I feel you
I dated my future husband for 7 years starting at age 16. I always initiated EVERYTHING. Once just to test it I didn't call him for 2 weeks and he never called me, I finally called him and he is like "Hey! How are you!!" For some reason I stayed and agreed to marry him. Marriage was the same, me initiating everything, making all decisions. I divorced him 15 years later. I just can't believe I stayed with him that long, put up with it that long. SMH
I did the same thing. It’s hard to accept my decisions but free now and know better. Better late than never 🙏💛
Eish for 7years
My ex married someone because she initiated everything & he just went along with it because he thought that’s life.
I value my life too much to be in that mindset.
Some guys just want to be with anyone & don’t figure out what they actually want.
I’m sorry you had to go through this! I dated a man that made me initiate 60% of the time then it kept dropping to 70% and lower. He always spoke about marriage (keeping me on a hook) so I stopped initiating to see what he does. FIVE DAYS went by with no text or calls but I caught him commenting under hot girl pics online. I sent him a breakup letter and went no contact with him. He got mad but honestly I can’t see myself marrying a man that is okay not talking or even checking up on me for five days. I love him. Until now my heart hurts and I get an urge to go back to him but I know he isn’t the one for me. He was emotionally unavailable.
You finally did it-congrats
"I want the option to deal with her, not the obligation " that hit home.❤
oooohhhhhhhhh.....wow
In my experience, internalizing the rejection (e.g. the thought that as an option, I'm not good enough) actually made me work harder to get said prize. I never understood how being dismissed or undervalued by a man would actuality motivate me to ignore these signs and try even harder until I started therapy and learned that I was seeking a trauma bond, not the individual (daddy issues ladies!)
All that to say, when we heal, and figure out why we tolerate what we tolerate, it's easier to spot these signs, and even easier to anchor dead weight.
Your videos have saved me from making another mistake, thanks Stephan!
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
Same here because I'm in that situation now.😢
oh stephan.....after over 2 months of no contact, my decision, he calls out of the blue "needing help with an official situation" i, like a nut, don't stop, think, consider or anything....i say yes, regret it immediately the next day and the "dinner" we were to have 2 days later after of course not hearing from him for 2 days i conveniently ignore....im empowered by your talks...so, i did something i don't like to do...i simply blocked his number...he is a negative influence in my life, a distraction to the way i want to live my life in Christ and overall just someone i really don't want around my life.....thanks for the good work you put out...DON'T STOP.....
2 months? He should of been blocked 😅
I have been one of those women and Im not ashamed to say it because I am a good woman. But, victim no longer! I have reformed myself in life; giving every sector a major overhaul with God's help. Im single and Im okay with that!
I had to learn how to spend time with me and had to learn how to appreciate and delight myself in the things about me and what I can do. Trust me when I say that there's no better moment. Being a woman who have been through hell in relationships, I realized why must I continue to do that? And its sad that it took me this long to realize that, those men didnt deserve me, didnt deserve my attention, my love, my patience not even that, of my virtue. Iam alone for a reason! The right guy will make himself known. Im not worrying about it! Im working on me and Im just fine! Im enjoying being Santeria. Just me, myself, and I.
We made plans to see each other on Valentines Day and he ghosted me. No messages no call no show. He reached out two days later and acted like nothing was wrong said he had a lot going on. Haven’t heard from him since 😕
Sounds like he is seeing someone else or just not serious about you . Take it as a blessing and move on to someone that deserves you ❤
I really dont understand men when it comes to showing up and they pretend like nothing happened,, men are truely from Mars
I have to agree. He spent valentines with someone else.@@kaoshi_kutie
Excellent! Win/win, he’s a rude, low character guy
@@maryanneville4397that'snot a "man" thing hun. That's a very specific thing from a person who has zero respect for someone. That has nothing to do with Mars don't do that.
Im glad I ran into ur channel bc I never knew what to look for in a man bc I didnt grow up with a good example. Ur videos truly has helped me.
Same
Same
Im 50+ I don't have time for broken men and games. Im done. I give up. I don't want to go through this crap anymore.
Same
True
I’m getting there too
I'm not sure if I'm in a situationship or not. He says he wants to go slow but for me it feels the actions are fast. We spend a lot of time together, both sexual and non sexual - dinners, comedy clubs, gym, fun runs, spa etc. We message everyday, he initiates more than I do. He even calls in the evenings (and a couple of times has called me in the mornings). He's not seeing anyone else, he's not even on dating apps. He's taken time off work to help me, he called me on xmas for 3 hours, we've gone away together on a weekend, he celebrates my achievements and we have great conversation. He got me really thoughtful xmas presents, he came over and fixed my bed and my boiler...and that's just off the top of my head.
Yet he tells me he's not ready for a relationship - and it's been almost 6 months. I'm freaked out as it wouldn't be my first situationship but I feel like we are in a relationship and he just seems to not want to acknowledge it and I can't understand what's holding him back?
Sounds like he's really not sure about you. It's time to make yourself less available to him before he takes you for granted. Tell him your looking for a committment and start dating other men. If he's afraid of losing you, he will it up and get serious, if not ....there's your answer.
The love doctor....God bless you, Stephan❤
❤️ 🙂 Thank you and may God bless you as well 🙏
I just experienced this with someone I knew and was friends with for over 20 years. Dating became difficult for me and I had to go my own way. These signs are a good wake up call. Thank you for this Stephen
That was never your friend hun. Women have to wake up. If he treated u THIS way he never considered u his friend and probably didn't even respect you.
All 4 signs match the situation I am in at the moment. This is very painful to realize but it's also necessary so i can move on.
Thanks Stephan
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
I'm going through the same situation, I cried a little. But I'll bounce back soon as I cut him off. TODAY!!!!!!!! Thank You Stephan.
This video was on point for sure. Especially #4. ❤
❤️ 🙂 Thank you!
Great Real Advice Consistency In One’s Actions Will Always Reveal Whats For You And What Isn’t We Must Use Discernment In All Stages✔️✨🖤
Indeed, it really helps when we embrace using discernment in every stage. Thank you for sharing 🙏
Omggg.. you hit my 25 year marriage on the head. You were spot on!! Thank you!! I’ve already headed for divorce…2024 is my year!!🙏🏽
Yep “free yourself” is the key. Bc a person is attracted to you, it’s an action word.
Where the hell was this video when i needed it a month ago!?!? lmao Love this!!!!!!!❤❤❤ made the right decision
Stephan Speaks amd Sadia Khan....if amyone can get these two to have a sit down together and talk about relationships, that would be the icing on my cake🍰
1 of those hitting the Spirit Moment 😄 i understand u very well.
❤️ 🙂 Thank you!
Let's just Not WASTE our time on BS that's Not for Us. Easier said than done. But We Got this and we're all priorities to the Right one.
Thats how I Feel with the guy I want. It hurls. 💔
It's hard to leave. 😢
@MeetStephanSpeaks, I've been subbed for a very long time and I listen to your posts on a daily basis. This experience has happened to me more than once (situationships/relationships), I've confronted them about this same issue, and I've come to the realization that I will no longer waste my time with a man that doesn't want to put their 100% into the relationship as I always reciprocate. So I will patiently wait until my "Boaz" finally meets my "Ruth". No time for games in 2024 and beyond, it's not worth it. Thank you for your insightful posts, and blessings to you and all viewers!!! #knowmyworth#happilysingleuntil#selfloveisthebestlove#patientlywaiting 💖☝🏾👏🏾✊🏾💯
Thank you so much sir. God will bless you
I appreciate that ❤️ 🙏🏼
Feelings vs facts
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
The first two mins of the video is profound. Exactly what I needed to hear. Thank u again for waking me up ❤
Stephan, I’m SO GLAD you touched on the “decent/good”guy who treats you well and addresses issues but still won’t commit. It’s a strange, confusing area to be in. I recently found myself caught up in a situation like that and left but it was HARD and there aren’t many videos about it. He wanted to be “exclusive” and even got STD tested for me but just couldn’t commit. He gave tons of time, initiated, added to my life and seemed to do all the right things but just couldn’t take it any further. My heart was starting to be invested and I had to step it back.
How can se want to be exclusive and give you time and everything, but not commit? 🤔 Sounds like he did commit
I feel you, it definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
@@Adriana.Gabriela being exclusively sleeping with each other and being in an official committed relationship where he actually claims you are two different things. But both have expiration dates. Acting as though and giving the benefits of a relationship while not actually being in something defined and structured is a slippery slope. Be careful-don’t get caught up in the situationship trap! 💗
@@burgundymustard3811 I'm not sure what you re saying here by him claiming you. You ennumerated things that he does do, which make for a commited relationship. Are you saying he doesn't want to be seen with you in public or tells his friends you're not together or what?
I’m in a mixed messages situation and many of the points you are hitting is hurting my heart… damn 🤦🏽♀️ he initiates sometimes doesn’t ask questions about me and minimizes time I think I’ve wasted a year 😢
🙏 I hope he reaches the point of truly doing what is best.
@@MeetStephanSpeaks I hope pray he does… I see a good man but hurt and unemotionally unavailable on the surface. I’ve learned men hurt differently but as a women I can’t wait for someone to heal or don’t want to heal while building in the process.
I needed to hear this. Thank you.
Thank you Stephanie for your wisdom, yet again! I am very attracted to a man, there seems to be chemistry, yet we are nearly 2 hours apart. We met once with both meeting an hour from our cities. From there, I’m initiating the effort and understanding and accepting he is busy with his work, he could still answer texts and give alternatives to plans i suggest. Just don’t see it, and knowing my value and worth as a potentially great partner, I kindly suggested we move on. He took it as I was being “negative” towards hi. I see that as being a victim. Red flag!! Moving on, gratefully.
Stephan, not Stephanie😂
Hi Stephon! Hailing all the way from Trinidad and Tobago 🇹🇹 Thank you so much for your knowledge and wisdom, I listen to you almost everyday 😊👍🏾
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
My bf always want me to come over and he is always hungry, i feel like it is more about the sex, he never discusses the future and he is saying thats just how he is and communication is the key
I really needed this video today Stephan…I’ve been in a “situationship” with a man like the example in this video for going on 3 years and I have literally experienced all 4 things discussed in this video…but for the past 3 months I’ve had a new man come in the picture and he is applying all the pressure and he is really trying to be serious with me…but I don’t feel comfortable just “ghosting” Mr. Situationship…I’m confused…this did give me some more insight on what to do.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
No need to ghost Mr Situationship; just cut ties with him cleanly and clearly. Then move on with the guy who is worth your time.
I recommend you monkey branch like most women do😏
Girl u sound like you're in 2 situationships which really is awful at our age. 3 months is a long time and years is WAY too long to not be serious. Grow up put on your grown WOMAN panties. You're allowing yourself to be an option for BOTH of these men.
Send him a letter kindly stating you enjoyed your time together but it won’t work out and after you sent it go no contact and block him from everywhere. That’s what I did when I realized I was also in a situationship and he was using me as a placeholder. Drop him and move on!! That letter is closure for him.
You're like the big brother I never lol. Every time I get lonely and wanna circle the block, I see your videos that resonate lol. ❣
Thank you for the clarification. This is very helpful in making decisions in relationship
Glad I could help 🙏
Thank you for clarifying that!
My pleasure ❤️
When he doesn't take you out
False promises
My two things to add
Thank you for sharing Stephan this really helps
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
Thank you for this video.. so on point.. God bless your endeavors
❤️ 🙂 Thank you very much and may God bless you as well 🙏
I cannot thank you enough for creating this. It reached me right when I needed it the most. Much gratitude from India. 🙏🌸
Can you please also elaborate on what can a woman do in the case where she sees all these signs but still feels in her heart that there can be so much potentially more to him and the relationship, how can she go from “being an option” to “being the one” then ?
Teach lt Coach ' Free the Woman
I will not be chasing anyone's love, regardless of whether it's romantic or not. They can be reciprocal with me or no relationship. Nope I will not be the initiator ever again. I don't care who you are, what your excuses, what you're doing, no one is ever too busy for someone they truly desire and truly unconditionally love. People who always say they're too busy or make up excuses, they aren't the one for you. They do not want to put the time and effort and be reciprocal with your love. Then I say the best thing to do is let them go because they ain't for you.. Thank you for your relationship advice, not just for men, but for women, and for mutual beneficial relationships. Because if two people can't work together with it it ain't going to work a relationship to really blossom cannot be one-sided.
Too many women give way too much too soon only to be disappointed and yes wasting their time. Women, please live in reality and don't lie to yourself that it is more than what it is. Stop making this easy for these men.tbey hardly have to do anything to get royalty treatment change this narrative! Xo ❤ we are worth it we deserve much more
Always right to the point 📌
God will not be mocked🙆🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️using His glory😮. So shrug your shoulders and dust off your feet.
SPOT ON 🔥
❤🙏
I love your realness, it doesn’t hurt either. As a woman that’s made mistakes in her past. I have no regrets, you helped me get out of something. Are you doing any events in the Bay Area any time soon?
I've told him how I feel, poured my heart and soul...no show to correct anything. So adios...I'll put my time and energy into someone who does have time for me...😊
You know what you’re talking about 👏🏾 😄
God bless you Stephan. Your videos always comes at the right time. I've been watching and following you right from Ghana 😊
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
If you can't decide who you want to be in my life then I will decide on your behalf! I am nobody's appliance or resource. Also, you don't have what it takes to be committed. I have told the truth.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
My head's spinning from the contents of this video. 🤣🤣🤣
and here I am thinking about my teacher again (we're both in our early thirties), he only initiates talking to me when he thinks I need help, but he seems kinda nervous around me and he seems to be blushing when we're talking, but since he's pretty passive I'm just really confused and I can't read him at all, that's pretty much the story of my life, I hope God has a man in store for me who doesn't just make me confused and frustrated almost all the time.
🙏 I hope he reaches the point of truly doing what is best.
I can't, I'm trying😢. It's hard
It definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
I can’t wait to leave ..I’m working on a lot of crap before I bounce ..and then I’ve tried with others because he’s not loyal anyway.Im just going to stay single.God didn’t give me a kitty clicker for nothing 🤷♀️.I had and have kids and grandkids .Im good .As soon as my youngest gets that license I’m done !Il be working on getting a job ,moving out,working out ,kick boxing ,lifting and swimming.🤷♀️.Im going to do me .Save up to go to real estate school.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
Stephan, Can you do a video on a man who fights falling in love? Thank you
2:10 Can you talk about the ones that does chase. But also have you on rotation. He only wants to come over. No dates.
No one should be an option! If a partner is not a priority why is their a partnership!?? Love , Honesty, Respect & Communication! ❤️🙏Trust God to give strength!
So let him go to who he love
I have a man im about to walk away from. He keeps canceling on me saying hes sick. Im starting to feel like its off. I feel like im just an option.
He is seeing other women that's why he's not available all the time.
Steve you're great you don't talk bout internet relationships
Thank You for Sharing
Thank you for this video this helped me so much 😊 I learned a lot ❤
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
Thank you so much for this video!!! Spot on.
Ur an authority of love and its important that we all listen to what u have to say❤. Wisdom
❤️ 🙂 Thank you very much I appreciate that!
Thank you sooo much for this video!!❤😭
But then why marry just because she's there. If the one you love loves you truly then he should marry the second not the first. You live your life only once. Don't throw away your chance of real love.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you ❤
Man u speak the truth I been watching u for a while year now never responded but I am now
I am a very busy woman working a full time job and a part time job. I had a man to tell me i am a very busy woman. When i sit back and look at yes i am. I guess i dont have time for a relationship right now i am focusing on myself. I dont know if this a bad thing or good thing.
If you’re happy, nothing wrong with it 😊
Thank you
My pleasure ❤️
Wow this is what's going on with me.
🙏 I hope you reach the point of truly doing what is best.
Thats true
He says he loves me n he committed to me
But then dun call me once in 2 months or hear my voicenote nor picks my call
Leave all my msgs on seen
N when i confronted him
He went silent n now ghosting me lol
I'm on no contact with him now
I'm sorry to hear about that. I pray that you heal from all that you have been through and be able to keep moving in faith 🙏 ❤️
thank you for your insights
It's important for women to get as many "suitors' as she can if it's come to the point where he doesn't get serious, stop sleeping with the guy if that's the case, and date other men. ( But don't give them sex).
Sometimes options can be trust issues as well 🤷🏽♀️💯
Eve was deceived not Adam...thank you for helping me see it. Grateful..and not mad at him..not going to villainize but learn. Between the lines of what you said..he is not making promises or commitments. Thank you so much
❤❤❤❤❤❤Bless all of us AMIN. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND WORK. NAMASTE
Can you make a video about living together before marriage is it a bad idea? Please, I am currently in this situation and I’m starting to regret agreeing to it.
Great suggestion, I will add it to my list to get it done!
11:25 He signs everything. With love....and is focuced on my health, homes comfort ..but its time i I need...he has much work ...work....im so confused....and it makes me anxious...he tells me we were destined to be together...
A man with one of the flaws Stephan just stated is okay. But you are just an option to him if he gives you PLENTY of crumbs. Best to dump the yahoo immediately and watch his head spin lol. No one should settle for a casual relationship anyway! 😳
Hey, Stephan, I gotta call you out. All if your responses to people's comments is *the same* We are sharing our hearts with you. I'd rather you not "comment" than have someone copy and paste the same thing over and over. Please stop! If you can't individualize the resoonse, stop!
Thank you ❤
My pleasure ❤️
What are your thoughts on a man that initially thought that he wasn't going to be serious about a woman and then after experiencing getting to know her wanting to be totally in? What would that look like?
This! I want to know too, currently in this position.
He will sacrifice for you, want to spend time with you, offer to help in any way he can even if it’s not financially.
In majority of situations, it's leading to disaster but all depends on the context
I experienced this before. He initially said he had no time for a relationship but after a couple of months of us just building a friendship he started spending nights at my house, taking off work to spend days with me, we went on dates and when I wanted to take a step back due to personal reasons, he really tried to convince me to give us a chance. He now only reaches out to me 2-3 times a year but I do sometimes wish things were back to how they were.
Love it ❤️
I wish you could do thing on twin flames. Because I'm in a really bad situation with a twin flame who keeps telling me he desires me, wants me, is going to physically come to me, but he never does. They say that twin flame relationships are different than regular relationships, but I'm not buying that. I think if somebody really desires you and wants you regardless, they're a twin flame, soulmate, kindred spirit, karmic partner, a regular boyfriend, husband, whatever whoever they are, if they really if a man truly desires you, he will put the effort time into you physically and you will have no doubt that he's into you. If you're doubting if a man's into you and he's not putting the time and effort, then he ain't the one for you. That is my new philosophy regardless whoever it is. From now on this point in my life, I will not be taking any more time and effort for action towards anybody who cannot be reciprocal with my love. ❤❤
Brilliant 😊
Yes I'm just a Option.
I don't have to let go for the universe to pave the way to new opportunities........ literally just opened my door and new neighbor just stared down my soul😂😂😂 i even get smiles while I'm driving.......but o how I still want him. Yes new phases open and this one closed but the passion lingers. I wont be an option to him ever again though. My demons wanted his demons to imprint my soul and thats all that was. Lust and passion can be blinding. I dont let my emotions dictate my behavior but not having real sex in so long has psychological effects.
My mind is blanking out too as im watching this. I like listening to you.
And o f n no. Im not gonna forget his violation! Last time we hung out he said hes kn dating apps meanwhile last summer he denies me a night swim at a water fall with a bottle of whiskey saying he doesn't want me to get romantic feelings 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂.
I went from Brooklyn socialite to hermit up in fhe woods he has no clue how good he could have had it cause all i literally needed from him was for him to show me his heart, then lots of good sex. I don't like people in my space to much cause i love solitude. Whatever im babbling as im listening.
Thanks and Blessings 🙏🏽🕊️💖
🙏 ❤️
Man, I love your videos
Glad to hear that and don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity
Why I get attention only from men who are needy and sees me as the last chance? Or men aestetical really below mine? Or manipulators and narcs?
It is because after our 40's games are done?
I pray that you receive the man who is truly best for you, the man God has for you ❤ 🙏
I have a good heart 🥰🥰🥰 often then not get strung along❤❤I do need your book ❤but I've been dealing with needing to help my son out❤
Do you have a video on defining if a guy really likes you or is desperate? I feel especially with these dating apps it is hard to determine who is desperate vs. interested.
I'm yet to create a video on that. I will add it to my list to get it done!
Thank You.
What is your opinion on men not having monogamous relationships? I've been into watching a few podcasts regarding relationships recently and there's this one specific individual who claims that men can't be monogamous and he himself is in an exclusive relationship with a woman and claims he loves her however he is sleeping with other women (and his woman is aware of this and tolerates it).