This happens here in the USA. One woman thought moving to New York City would be like the TV shows and movies, NO ONE should base life decisions on what is, by definition, fake. A TV show or movie would not be fun to watch if it were realistic. She mentioned one specific TV show which (it starts with the S word in case YT would not like that) surprised me because people don't particularly act ethically in that show yet she was both using this for her model and expecting it to actually be like that IRL. Personally, I think big city living is over-rated the world over. One can visit a big city for the museums, etc but living there would never appeal to me. Oddly, most big city residents never go to the stuff that is unique about a big city in a positive like the museums but DO go to the stuff in big cities that is shallow or destructive.
American Expat living in Paris 5th for 5 years during which period I have never found but kindness, openness, and friendliness from the Parisians. Start every interaction with bonjour or bonsoir..and I never speak English and always try my broken-ass French. But get used to industrial strikes, demonstrations, and everyone always complains how bad things are.. c'est tout..😊
I remember my first visit to Paris when I was 13 years old. My dad was a visiting professor at the medical university, and while he was in meetings, I was free to shop and explore along the Champs-Élysées. So there I was, this very young American girl, with braces on her teeth, who spoke only a tiny bit of French that I had learned in middle school. I will never forget how wonderful the people were! Perhaps they loved that I was such a young girl making an effort to speak their language, but I will never forget their warmth and kindness.❤
I'm a retired American expat who moved to Aix-en-Provence 8 years ago. I love France; the people, food, culture, history, and the countryside. Truthfully, I don't want live anywhere else. When I go back to the US every 2 years to see my kids, I can't wait to leave.
I'm a semiretired American expat living in or near Paris for 16 years. I agree with how you feel about the US. And Lucile, I appreciate how much thought you're putting into this. I would add, if you come to France expecting your American (or Japanese or Brazilian or whatever) values and culture to translate here, it won't serve you well at all. It's simplistic, but there is much truth in the saying " when in Rome, do as the Roman's do".
That is wonderful ! I enjoy visiting France and my Daughters Study French very seriously . But please do not vote in the U.S. anymore . I do not want the government control that France has.
Do you know of any online communities where Americans can learn about French culture and some language perhaps? I am from Chicago but hope to retire in France. I need to overcome the feeling that it's such a big task😊
I am an American that has lived in the countryside in the Southwest near Toulouse for going on three years. The Occitanie region is beautiful with many medieval villages, farms, orchards, vineyards and the people are very nice, they even insist on practicing their English with me when I am trying to speak French. I love the French countryside, the French country lifestyle and visiting all of the local, little villages. One thing that I tell other Americans that have only been to Paris is this. "Thinking that Paris represents all of France and all of the French people is like thinking that New York City represents all of America and all Americans".
Canadian living in the USA here, despite having grown up watching US television and sharing similar culture and language it is still a culture shock. Every culture has its differences and ways of doing things. I lived in Greece for a few years and had to learn a new way of interacting with people. You go with an open mind, and try to remember they were there before you arrived. Adapt and assimilate.
Canadian who has lived in the states for years. you can get "reshocked". Just moved to the Bay area for work. NOT a hint of Xmas. IKEA has no Xmas decorations, not one.. looking at the clientele, i could see why. Some houses have decorations but at work, Christmas is considered "personal day off" . i am 61. One thing the English and the French Canadians agreed on when i was young was the whole week off between Christmas and New Year was off. It was a Canadian culture until the mid 1990s when lots of new Canadians to be were invited.
I traveled alone in France and one experience I remember and cherish is when fellow lavarie patrons helped me with a broken dryer because I didn’t speak enough french to call the help line! Granted, it would affect them all when it was their turn to dry their clothes, but they were kind and patient and gracious when they saw I was getting flustered and confused (cell service was also out for Americans in Europe, so I had no way to open a translate app. I was stuck with what I remembered). This was in Bordeaux. I will never forget them ❤
I have to admit, that as someone who has limited French language skills, and does not live there but has visited Paris, Northern France (Arras, Cambrais, Albert area) and Eastern France (Strasbourg), I have only ever had good and friendly interactions with all the French people I have met, and have made some good friends.
Lucile, the French girl, so sweet and petite, Moved back to France, where life is a treat. But oh, the surprises she had to explain, To those who found France a bit of a pain. "Bonjour," she said, "is a must every day, And don't you dare rush, take time to say. The shops close at noon, for a leisurely lunch, And Sundays are quiet, no shopping to crunch. The bread is divine, but don't ask for toast, And tipping's a no-no, it's not like the coast. The language, oh dear, can be quite a test, But try your best, and you'll be impressed. The bureaucracy's slow, and the queues never end, But patience, my friend, is a virtue to tend. The wine flows like water, the cheese is a dream, But watch out for strikes, they're more common than cream. So if you can handle these quirks with a smile, France will enchant you, mile after mile. Lucile's little tips, with a wink and a cheer, Make living in France a joy, never fear!" ❤❤❤
I'm so impressed by how thoughtful and 'deep' your videos are. I'm a retired film teacher and visited Paris once a long time ago. I mostly know French culture through French films which I love, through reading etc. I like your metaphor of the iceberg with so much about the deep culture below the surface. Two of my favorite films are based on the memoirs of Marcel Pagnol: 'My Father's Glory' and 'My Mother's Castle' (1990). And a few days ago I discovered there is a new film that is a remake of part of the same memoir: The Time of Secrets (2022, available on Amazon Prime in the US). Of course, the stories are set in the early 20th century before WWI and they bring to life paintings by Renoir. But they show the class system, the importance of education and religion which are still a part of the 'deep' culture. Thanks again for your wonderful videos which are so illuminating!
Yes some of it’s still true like the class,system, although the criteria have changed. But religion, no : it’s difficult to imagine for an American but france is one of the most de-christanized country in Europe, and therefore in the world. Also, even among the families that still practice -5% of the population-, it’s viewed as rude and embarrassing to flaunt your religion openly : faith has become a totally [rivate matter, and people talking openly about it are viewed as hypocritical and ultimately pharisians.
There was (maybe still is) a non stop flight between Seattle and CDG. It's 10 hrs. But what is so fun is that if you want to spend a weekend in Paris, you can leave Seattle Friday Afternoon, and arrive in CDG at 8am Sat. You can then spend two days in Paris, and get on your return flight Monday around noon, chase the sun back, and arrive Monday in Seattle also at the same time as you left.
And for someone who doesn't care about carbon footprints or preserving the planet. (I'm not saying never to fly, but making such a long trip for only two days, it's not a good idea! Also, Paris deserves better)
Back in 2018, I went to La Rochelle on the coast of Bay of Biscay. There were delays with my work and ended up spending 3 weeks instead of 3 days. What a wonderful place with the nicest people you could imagine. Had a blast. I was a real ding dong that only got by with bon jour and merci and it worked.
There are huge differences between big cities and country towns or villages. Between the Northern part, more Germanic and the South, more Latin. Between the West, Celtic and maritime, and the East, industrial and mountainous. And some regions are not sure they are even French.
I feel like a lot of Americans don't understand how crucial the language factor is, if you're thinking about moving to another country. The error a lot of people make is, visit the country on vacation, go to all of the fun touristy areas where the majority of workers, tour guide folks, etc. speak English, and then come back thinking they can move there and get by with just English. Certainly not the case! Thank you as always for another insightful video! Can't wait to see the content that 2025 will bring! I definitely need to check out that footwear brand☺☺
Some people (in a strange way related to English as a first language) seem to think that all languages sound like loud English with a reduced vocabulary in an aggressive tone with some waving of the hands on top...
I’m a true L.A. guy, born in the U.S., VERY American. I’ve been to France 3 times, from Nice to Paris to Bordeaux. I’ve ALWAYS had a wonderful time!! I try to speak a bit of French (4 years of classes when I was in school years ago), and I’ve found the French people (AND Parisians!) to be very nice, and accommodating. However, I know other Americans who’ve gone to Paris, and French towns, who have hated the experience……..but those people are VERY American, meaning they don’t try to speak French, they dress like they’re still in Montana, or Illinois, they won’t try French foods, and don’t understand why the French aren’t more like them!! (Ugly American syndrome). ….It’s all about you’re ATTITUDE, and accepting a different culture!!! 🤷🏼♂️😎🥂
It is not just Americans who can behave that way. If you understand other languages, you will hear the same thing from peoples visiting the US too. I know of Chinese visitors who will only go to Chinese restaurants while visiting America, speak very broken English to the point of sounding rude (sadly, they probably did not realize it). I have also encountered someone insisting on finding a Mexican restaurant in the middle of Nicosia, Cyprus because he was confused about Mediterranean culture vs. Hispanic culture. There will be cultural boors from all over the world, and you just hope not to have to deal with them.
From LA, one time I met a guy from Minnesota in Vienna who was freaked out by seeing all the Turkish immigrant women with head coverings. Like al Qaeda was outside the hotel. And this was before 09/11.
@ …….I know people in Montana who won’t eat ANY vegetables (except potatoes). Seriously, NO veggies, ever! Not even a salad!! They call vegetables “scary stuff”. (That’s why they’re called Flyover States I guess! 🤷🏼♂️😂).
I loved my visit to Paris 20 years ago. I used “French for Dummies” to get a head start on the language. I can’t wait to come back and visit the smaller towns. I am retired now and would like to spend some quality time.
I learned French in high school, and have visited Paris France once. I was able to leverage my limited training in order to check into my hotel and order food. I enjoyed my visit and look forward to returning. The sentiment that Americans don't like the French is hopefully a small percentage. I enjoyed my visit to Paris. Additionally, my co-worker, who is from France, had a great sense of American humor, and understood it. Also, this individual was extremely savvy in understanding our company's benefits and making sure employees where getting the most out of the benefits (pay, vacation, health care, vacation pay, etc.) , where my American co-workers where so oblivious to these things. He was also very detailed. I appreciated him for the unique skills he brought to the job.
I moved from the UK to Lyon back in 2018 and France is now my home. I love it here and when I got back to the UK to visit family it doesn't feel like home. I can't speak of Paris obviously but Lyon is love ❤
Lyon is a great city, and perfectly located in the country : not far from the mediterranean sea, not far from the Alps, from Paris, Italy or Switzerland. Good choice !
@@heliedecastanet1882 Yes I adore living in Lyon. I don't live in the very centre (Bellecour) but I can get the metro into Bellecour in around 7 minutes so hardly an issue. Public transport here is super. Quality of life is wonderful. In my 6 years I have personally experience no problems with crime or antisocial behaviour. The reason I moved from the UK is partly because of Brexit but also I was violently assaulted in the UK when I was stabbed (thankfully not life threatening injury) in London. I wanted a better quality of life so when a job opportunity came my wifes way I said "yes let's just try it and see how it works out, we can always move back if it's awful" but it is without question the best decision of our lives. My son just started college (11yo) and is fully bilingual so goes to an international school for mixed French and English education. We have a lovely home roughly 2.5x the size of our UK home for the same price. We do pay slightly more in taxes when you look at it at face value but we actually have more disposable income as those "hidden taxes" the UK has (i.e council tax, road tax, more expensive food, clothes, services, etc) are different here so while it may _look like_ we pay more taxes in reality we don't which is something people don't factor in when looking at "cost of living and taxes" as a whole. As for the French people they're truly wonderful. At least here in Lyon. I have not had a single bad experience with anyone. Everyone is just so friendly. I get invited to play pétanque to strangers who quickly become friends 😄Our neighbours are all lovely. The work live balance is truly life changing. Work comes behind the actual important parts of like like family, health and happiness. is France perfect? Lol of course not. But they get far more right than they get wrong. You could not get me to move back to the UK unless you could give me the same quaity of life and a lot of money so I never had to work again or worry about getting health care, etc. Oh and French healthcare is phenominal. People always try to pick it apart but trust me when you need to use it you quickly realise the UK and US systems are no way near as good. The data backs this up but many UK and US people will try and deny it having never experienced it out of some like of elitest protectionism mentality about their own system by denying it needs reform. So yeah France isn't _the_ best place on earth but it is easily _one of_ the best places without question.
I've never been to Paris before and I've heard good things instead of the bad things there! It's the city of love ❤and it has great things that other people will enjoy! I love and enjoy watching your content throughout these pass few months Lucile & keep up the great work! I wish you and your family Merry Christmas 🎁🎄🎁and Happy Holidays from London, England! 🎅🎄☃✨
As an Englishman visiting France i noticed you always get a hearty ''Bonjour!'' and it's rude not to respond even though the French aren't into small talk generally as much as Anglo-American people are....
This is the most interesting segment on your channel so far for myself. I got a great deal out of it, especially reagrding work culture differences between France and the USA. Thanks!!!
Lucile, thanks for this video. Can't imagine folks are moving to a place and trying to make it into the place they moved FROM. Ugh vive la différence! FUN Fact: Old skool New Orleans we. wouldn't dare walk into a place and not "speak" "Hello, Good Morning, How u doin?or somethin!. It is considered "il-Mannered", disrespectful and makes people say "Who raised you?" Culturally you represent your parents and in NOLA we wouldn't dare disgrace our family name like that.Not all of the US is the same. Can't image moving to a place without studying the deep history of it. 💝💝💝
If you don't actually appreciate the breadth and depth of French culture or have any of your own, the French will pick it up and treat you accordingly. A revers, if you have manners and kindess, they will also pick it up and you will be treated with great kindness and civilisation. Vive la France!
I totally agree that complainers do not realize that they are the rude ones in the first place. It happened to me that a person from a neighboring country, with the usual rivalries, started saying bad things about my fellow citizens. I was trying to be particularly nice to avoid the usual jokes, and then I have to stop myself from telling him, he is the idiot, not my fellow citizens and not his fellow citizens. It's the complainer the rude one who starts the fire and they blame it on the others. They totally deserve to be sent for a walk. I don't do it because I don not like talk to snakes, but if someone else sends them for a walk, it's fine, they asked for it.
I’ve visited Paris, Reims, Strasbourg, Nice, Lyon, Arles, Avignon, Provence region, Vienne, Perouges, and multiple other small towns. I have loved every minute in France. I would love to move there but am doubtful of my ability to improve upon my basic French enough to be fluent. So I’m planning to move to Spain upon retirement, as I can speak Spanish a little better, with trips to France and Italy. Best of both worlds. 😃
I 'm Français living in Australia (since 1982) and when I go back to Fr for "holidays" or other things, I have that quick "honeymoon" for a week ( ho the pastry shops😛) then all what I dislike in France (particularily the BUREAUCRATIE) begins to weigh on my shoulders... In some places in bad weather I feel totally depressed because it brings back old memories. The worst part is that it is for me like another country. Apart from visiting chateaux and eating good old gatronomie, I feel I have no more business in France.. I love your videos
Great vid Lucile. For me learning another language, you know you are progressing when you can understand subtle jokes.. BTW you have this whole Eva Green vibe going on Bravo!
Love France and the French. Have several French friends and acquaintances. Been there 4 times, the first three to the south, Nice, Montpelier, Ardèche, Toulouse, Pau, Bordeaux. Always heard some negative things about Paris and Parisians. Never believed it. Was in Paris for two weeks this year. Absolutely loved it, especially Montmartre, where we stayed. Great town and people. Was treated like royalty.
You made excellent points and it’s so good of you to educate people this way. What you said is true for moving anywhere. Even when I moved from eastern Canada to western Canada there was cultural shock. My first trip to France I didn’t know about the importance of greetings. Learning about that made my other trips so much better. It also helped in Mexico, where it’s the same. You’re considered extremely rude if you skip greetings.
The main culture shock to me in France was seeing how low the average person's spice tolerance is. It took a good deal of effort to find restaurants that served anything approaching heat. That isn't to say French cuisine is bland, it isn't, but sometimes I do crave some heat which wasn't so common there.
Ex-Manhattanite prepping for a move to Nice. I expect strikes, foolishness and people who want to be left alone. Same as NYC. As I'm retired I don't need to worry about the daily grind, which is a relief. Wait until you have to figure out water heaters in Singapore, lol. I can deal with anything at this point. The package thing will irritate me but I'm sure I will figure it out. I'm looking forward to a more relaxed way of life and the ability to travel the area more easily.
My dear Lucile, you mentioned that it is hard to make friends in France.....well I am born and raised in Germany and I live in Gascony now since 1999..... my children are born here my wife is french and is is the friendliest place on earth.....I would not want to live somewhere else...... I just have a friend from Sweden here (I spent 3 years there) and he confirmed to me that: It is a difference from night to day here in the South-West compared with Sweden..... You should go to Northern -Europe and than come back to France..... People are were warm, open and welcoming here....but you are absolutely right: Someone has to speak french if he wants to live here !
Not hard to make friends, rather time consuming, so to speak ^^ Real friendship means a lot to us...I mean my true friends could risk their life for me and so would I. Therefore, you can easily understand new comers won't be friends. Takes a lot of time and shared good or bad days. A lot. It's a scale that goes from love to hate. Friendship is love without sex, it's the same strong feeling and bond to someone. Can't be given straight away to perfect stranger. And once you've done it, once you're true friend to a French person, it's a lifetime sentence ^^
The French have their own idea of politeness 😄 For example in Germany it is not mandatory to start a conversation by saying hello. You just start talking. But you must not leave without saying Bye. That would be rude. In France it's the other way round.
Bravo! This isn't just about travel, it's anthropology. "The study of humans". Universal laws of human nature are here. Thank you for sharing your intelligent, questioning curious mind. I learn a lot. You are a bright light in the world. Subscribed❤.
I guess it's hard for every english speaking people to learn another langage: they believe too much that everybody on earth shall speak the same langage than them
Great video. You touch on many differences between both countries. I am French and I have lived in the US (California) for many years. I would have a difficult time adjusting to living in France again on a permanent basis. I love to visit and be a tourist. I can enjoy the best the country can offer. Living in France would require too much of an adjustment and frustration with many aspects of French life i.e the bureaucracy, the customer service, the weird hours, the banking system ( the bank employee calling me to give information on a deposit in my checking account - where the money came from and the “coordonnées” of the sender). No MLS to make it convenient to buy a house or an apartment. France is a beautiful country and has a lot to offer but I am always glad to come “home” after a visit.
Je discute régulièrement avec des compatriotes américains qui envisagent de vivre en France ou en Italie, et ils ont la même idée naïve que l'on peut apprendre une langue par immersion, comme s'il s'agissait d'une sorte de magie. En respirant l'air et en buvant l'eau, la capacité à parler la langue étrangère va arriver sans effort. Apprendre une langue demande du travail, de l'énergie et du temps. Et on ne peut pas apprendre une langue à fond sans apprendre la culture.
Thank you so much for this video . I am moving to Paris next year . This video was very interesting and informative. I have been very worry about how would I adjust . Thank you so much for this video !! .
The US has different cultures. If you are in New York City. You say hello. They look at you and say, “What!”. People in the south are friendly. Most non cities are very friendly in the US.
I visited Perros-Guirec on the coast. I experienced Escargot near this city for the first time. I will admit that I didn't understand to leave the hotel key at the hotel, but the nearby areas were very friendly. This might be because they are used to tourists from the UK, but it was still pleasant. I don't have a lot of experience with Paris, but the suburbs were nice.
People in California address people with “hello” where I lived for 30 years. NY is less likely to do so. Montana and other Midwest cities are friendlier too. When relocating back to NY area people tend to think I’m weird for being more open and friendly 🤷🏼♀️. My opinion and experiences
Fantastic video Lucille. Yes, our visits to france has raised so many variables. Paris was wonderful, the people were so welcoming on the whole. Saint Malo was a challenge and an interaction nearly come to bliws. Colioure was beautiful but the locals were reluctant to interact with Brits. Ouistreham is wonderful and have visited many times. Canne is challenging tho. Of course I can say the same of uk, London, Cornwall, lake district are sooo different. Love France and French people, well most of them😊😊😊😊❤
Lauren Bacall wrote in her autobiography that she loved Paris - And going to London after Paris took some getting used to - but she ended up loving London as much as Paris. As for Sir Laurence Olivier, in his memoirs he wrote that he couled never decide which city he found the most beautiful, speaking of Paris and St-Petersburg (Russia) Having travelled to both cities, I agree with Sir Olivier, cannot make a choice. Cannot wait to discover London, soon I hope
Bonjour, Lucile (See? I paid attention to your previous videos!): Faites-vous une vidéo de la restorátion de la Cathédrale Notre-Dame de Paris, s'il vous plaît? Aussi, pour quois je ne remarque pas beaucoup des fleur de lys quand je regarde la media de Paris ces derniers jours? Merci pour ta considération! -Les Voitures de Ciel (Flying Cars)
I was in Paris just at this May, before Olympic games. And it's funny how this city looks familiar after my Odesa, Ukraine. Especially by design of buildings of Central Odesa and French Boulevard of Odesa. But moreover, many of Paris features are matchable with Odesa. Depressive districts of Paris aren't so afraid after Odesa's Duke park or Jolio-Curie street. About people I can also admit that not to much Odesa-people speaks English (except 30 and less), but foreigner must know that not everybody Odesa local speaks Ukrainian by different reasons, one of which is "people are rude". And the main problem of Odesa and little bit Paris too, that people not even try to dig deeper in culture and history of the cities. Most people really thinking that attractiveness just fallen from skies on their places. In the end, maybe I wrong about full similarity of Paris and Odesa, I felt enough comfortable in Paris, which wish for everyone. ❤
People may underestimate the depth and breadth of behavior and attitudes encompassed by culture. We take in culture from the moment we're born -- it includes nearly instinctual behaviors like how close we stand and how we face each other, when we raise our voices, when we perceive hostile or insulting behaviors from others, etc. The amount of psychological distance and formal "honor" we give to teachers or supervisors is culturally influenced. How quickly we move from conflict to violence is a part of culture. Culture can even determine how much literal explanation you might need (versus picking up on nonverbal clues) in order to understand a task. In fact, a large share of what goes into socialization is absorbing and wielding the norms of one's culture so that we function well in that culture. So, no American should assume that French culture is "like" ours. Same with British culture, Thai culture, Senegalese culture, etc. And the same goes for people encountering Americans.
Bonjour! French suburbs look like American ones 🤣🤣🤣...and that shower handle on that bath is RARE. Most of the shower settings are a knob on top of the bath faucet or is a separate control on the wall
Some general tips about living in the EU - The least bureaucratic countries are the Nordic ones. If you want to be an employee, the highest net salaries (and cost of living) are in Switzerland, Luxembourg & Norway. If you want to be self employed, the lowest combo of income taxes + social security taxes are in the former Eastern Bloc. Easiest places to 'fit in' if you like to drink alcohol are EVERYWHERE! If you're a teetotaler then.... you're out of luck.
I feel like France is a beautiful country to travel to but not exactly the best place to live. As a Canadian, I noticed this by observing that there’s a lot more French people moving to Canada than Canadians moving to France for a multitude of reasons.
This Canadian left Canada 30 years ago and l appreciate life more here. I live on the ltalian border, am trilingual and find that life is 100% better here. As you say, l am the minority as it is usually the other way around.
When I visited France, outside of Paris, I found the people to be very nice. I think Parisians come off as being rude because they’re just from a big city. Big city people in America can be rude. My hardest thing would be learning the language. I’m not very good at that. I tried my whole life to learn Spanish. I know a lot of words, but I just can’t put it together in sentences. Maybe if I was immersed in a new country for six months or a year I gradually pick it up. After I retire, I will try that.
As a French person who has travelled a lot I have noticed that there is one thing that Americans and French people have in common: Both are generally friendly and open with foreigners... in their respective countries..., but as soon as they are abroad they tend to be often a bit arrogant and pretentious, thinking that coming from a superior country or culture the world must adapt to them rather than the other way around. When you have this kind of attitude you can only be received with distrust by the person in front of you and in return you will retain a feeling of rudeness from the locals. Basic psychology.
Great video! Valid points, very well explained (oops, bonjour Lucile - I almost forgot!). A tiny feedback about your graph: the word is adaptation (not adaption), but otherwise yes, your English is great.
"excpect to put alot of your personal self into work... lots of socializing with coworkers involving drinking...workplaces are very hierarchical" - Me, crylaughing in Japanese.
It was so wonderful that the French ALWAYS said bonjour! I have only been to Lourdes. The French people there were wonderful. The food in Lourdes was disappointing though.
Another difference is the strictness of the military. U.S. armed forces includes significant autonomy in their personal lives. French Foreign Legion culture is similar to a minimum security prison with restrictions and regulations.
I've been through CDG at least 20 times and every time something was on strike. The worst one for me was when the air caterers struck and they had to get us these god awful meal trays, they were like MREs though probably worse. Still, go on strike. Get the stuff you deserve. Us Americans should do the same.
Also the stereotypical French rudeness, I've only experienced in Paris. On another trip through CDG my flight was late arriving so I missed my connection and the Air France lady was so polite and helpful in getting me accomodated.
So it’s pretty much common sense stuff. Every country is different, and moving to a different country means there is a period of adjustment, and that adjustment can be hard. No place is perfect. There are pros and cons to just about every society
I believe that Hollywood is part of the problem. They tend to portray places using stereotypical perceptions, and many don't travel overseas enough to know any better. Anyways love your content and would love to visit France one day.
Christmas traditions within 20 years could disappear in France. They did in the Bay area of the USA my edit and for the last 5 years, the Christmas traditions are being closed down in Germany
I only spent a few days in Paris in my life, sadly, but I was surprised at how nice the people were. The only city that shocked me was London, people were so rude! I suppose Americans were disliked more there, but this was way back in 2011
Everybody has their own anecdotal evidence that one particular city is the actual rude one. I found most Londoners (and everywhere else in England) super helpful. People would go out of their way to help me find out what train I needed and helped me carry luggage up the underground stairs (and didn't steal it at the top). If you applied the same principles of this video to England, people would have to conclude that you were rude first and people picked up on this and you didn't understand English culture and that's why people were rude to you.
To be fair, that type of showerhead you describe around the seven minute mark is an unusual type. I'm an American and that screwed me up but good the first time I encountered that at a motel when I was in my 40s.
It always amazes me how many people would hope to move and live in another country and not prepare to learn or speak the language there. For any culture, if you cannot speak their language, you will be missing out on the actual interaction. So much goes on in daily life that you cannot comprehend without the most basic understanding of the language. Plus, it can also save your life in an urgent situation if you can tell someone exactly what has happened. It is one thing to order a sandwich in French, but a whole different matter if you had a fall and need to tell the responder that you cannot feel your toes anymore. I was once travelling in Asia and got very sick. When I got to Japan, I quickly asked to see a doctor and since I could describe the symptoms exactly in Japanese, he prescribed the correct medication plus more instructions on how to look after myself. Good job with your videos that cover realities, not just the fun things!
I hope you understand not everyone can gain fluency even after years of trying. And you are assuming a 60 year old American retiree will devote energy to doing that rather than enjoying their passions after 40 years of work.
@@vmoses1979 honestly, for a language like french, you can do 20mn of duolingo a day, just to get the very basics, in a few months you'll have good basics, and you'll recognize patterns around you, then your french will progress effortlessly PS: I realize my message may seem rude: this is not a "you MUST learn french" message, just a tip if you don't have so much time, duolingo makes it easy and fun, and you'll learn enough to get by, which will make your stay much easier
Ok. So, this is probably just my own ignorance, but I'm wondering why recently, everytime you mention that you used to work a corporate job in investment banking, you show the same two photos of you under the scaffolding. Don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining. They're great pictures, and you look gorgeous in them, but I'm just not sure if I'm personally picking up on the connection between them and investment banking. I also don't really know NYC, though. Am I supposed to recognize one of the buildings in the background? Is that it?
i’ve been thinking of moving to france in general after school in the us. but how to french people live if their salaries are so low but they have high costs of living?
It really depends where you live. You can live very comfortably on an average wage in a lot of places. It just won't have everything you would want and get in Paris for example however you will have many other advantages
For starters don't go expecting to live an American life in Paris. You likely won't be able to afford a car, but there is great public transit. You drink at home with friends and go to a club and buy 1 drink. You get smaller food portions that aren't overflowing but portioned properly, with excellent fresh ingredients well prepared. Learn to live like the locals.
@@pwp8737 I feel like I can adapt to this mostly . I’m going to a university in a city and the public transit isn’t safe and dirty. But usually the trains, trolleys, and buses come on time. I don’t know how public transit is in France, hopefully it’ll be more safe and clean.
It’s crazy the first thing that comes to minds in the US is money, money, money! French citizen earn less money than Americans in general but they wont have to pay extortionate prices like hospital bills, student fees, childcare cost, renting costs etc. I can tell you making about 2k€ outside of Paris living a normal life you certainly have a better quality of life than any americans making more money. Luigi Maggione does it ring bell? Tryna see Europe from a different perspective. I do have a house with a pool, i can afford summer breaks with my fam, did go to Japan twice, Dubai. Im not working for a tech firm btw. I used to live in NYC and London in the past. My quality of life has gotten better ever since i moved back. US salaries are higher due to high cost of living. French wages are lower as they wont have to worry about student debts, crazy hospital bills. If your household makes about 4k€ youll definitely will have a better life than any US households making 10k$!!
I think the reason why you feel there’s still so much to discover culturally in the US is because, there’s actually nothing to discover, it’s kinda like you’re searching for something that doesn’t exist… 😅haha *unless you’re talking about Native Americans *It was a joke…!* (but all jokes hold some truth behind them)
The fact that your boyfriend doesn't have a French bank account is shocking. There are so many things that require a rib whether it's getting a carte Vitale or paying for phone and electric or paying la caution for an apartment. Not to mention paying taxes. Getting a bank account should be done day one.
I lived in Paris for 5 years about a decade ago - had a French job, had French taxes and they still wouldn’t. I had to get paid into my revolut account (an int’nl bank), tbh that was the beginning of the end for me lol
Also living in France is more of a grind than the US. Forget the US longer working hours. In France, between domestic responsibilities, which tend to be more arduous because we lack things like dryers, administrative bs, transportation and jobs, we work longer and harder than Americans. Also French universities and jobs tend to foster more competition than the US, competiton that can get nasty. Look no further than the concours we have.
I'm British and had to open a French bank account when I bought a house there. The first one I tried demanded extra paperwork even though I had carefully researched what I needed and brought it along. Then the "agent immobilier" who sold me the house came to my rescue: he came with me to another bank and when they made things difficult he told them I was going back to England in a few days and would go to another bank if they didn't make it easy for me. This effectively cut through the red tape. On the positive side, I've found you get much better customer service once you've succeeded in opening the account. There are much more branches than in the UK, and everyone has their own "conseilleur" who you can meet face to face to discuss any issues. In the UK most things are done online, and getting to speak to anyone at all is an uphill struggle.
I love your videos and think you are adorable. I love France, but I have to point out that we absolutely do not have free healthcare. We pay extremely high taxes to pay for our healthcare. As for the fabulous food, culture, beautiful cities, etc., I totally agree.
Well, thanks for the clarifications about the fact that things tend to have a cost... "free healthlcare" because it's the same thing than when you call the police, you don't have to pay them a fee or have an insurance or something to have them making their job, I guess. You don't have to pay a fee to use the street your home is connected to. You pay taxes, for all that and more, yes, and social security is supposed to use all its weight to limit prices and excessive profit-taking by the various health players. The same way you pay for the police, the army, etc etc etc... In the end, it's the access to the service which is "free", so to speak.
For me the cultural shock was seeing how France has been Africanized. If you want to live among French people, you'll need to go to the rural areas like Creuse, Corrèze, Cantal.
Reality Check from Lucile: Another great corrective to all the expat rah-rah hoo-hah online, courtesy of a first-rate cross-cultural communicator and her sponsors. This may be of particular interest to the étoile-struck "Emily In Paris" audience. That said, if tu fais le saut, she's your wingman virtuel[le]. Bravo encore, Lucile, pour cette vidéo pleine d'astuces pratiques et futées et de votre sagesse en général -comme d'hab.
It's one thing to visit another country briefly, for pleasure, work or to see friends and family, or even to live there for a few months in a rented apartment on an extended visa. You don't have to know much or participate in local bureaucracy, pay most taxes, register with health services, obtain special subsidies, transit cards, deal with rental laws, auto registration, long-term neighbors, employers, colleagues, commutes, shopping, repairs, and so on. I.e. all the stuff that people who live in them have to deal with, regardless of the country. But move abroad and you'll have to deal with all of this, and then some, at which point it becomes a completely different experience. It can still be richly rewarding, but you're going to have to put much much much more work into it, not everything will be fun and easy, and there will be an extended adjustment period where you question the wisdom of it all. I've never lived in another, not as an adult at least, but I have moved cross-country in the USA, and that was challenging enough. Moving to another country would likely be way harder, because of the different language, culture, laws, social rules, foods, mentalities, and so on. Especially countries where prices and taxes tend to be higher and everything tends to be smaller and more limited than in the USA, which is most countries. I don't think I'd hate moving to Paris, I'm pretty adaptable and like challenges, but I also don't think I'd love it enough for it to be worth the hassle and adjustment, especially at this point in my life. I prefer to continue to visit now and then, and let others deal with the day to day stuff. Same could be said about Parisians thinking about moving to the USA. It's not for everyone, and probably not even for most. Trust me, especially these days. 😄
On the last minutes: Actually I'd say if you're an international student in the US you'll feel that you fit in very quickly. May be different in a work situation. And Americans adore European accents.
I love France, I have visited it many times from Marseille to Strasbourg and I loved it every time, people were very nice, helpful and polite. The rudest people in France in my experience were those who were born in other countries and became French citizens.... their ways are exaggerated particularly if they hold a position of authority....I guess they try too hard to be authentic....
I've spent a lot of time in Paris (9 months on multiple trips across 30 years) and I've never experience rude Parisians. I'm every careful to speak as much French as I can (with the best French accent I can -- not the tacky Americanized French), and when I cannot say what I need to say, I first ask, "Excuse moi, vous parlez Anglais?" And 100% of the time Parisians speak great English to me, and do so in a friendly manner. My hunch is that rude Americans experience rude ... everyone else.
Learning French is not difficult . It is rammed into you at school from age 11 ............and if you go on 6 more years to A-Level , you have a wide experience and springboard to then become fluent . ! It is not a very difficult language , and many words have a Latin root or are recognisable from English .
It's actualy English words that are recognisable from French as English mostly comes from French (you can find a very educative video on this topic on youtube).
I'm French and I advise you to get the hell out of Paris very quickly . It has changed in 30 years as many great cities. Go to Switzerland or Austria or Denmark......
There's no such thing as “A culture” when you're talking about an entire country. Even a large city like Paris, or Berlin, or LA (where I’m from), you're going to get a ton of subcultures. I've never had culture shock visiting anywhere - perhaps the most being when I visited North Carolina and nobody had a clue what decent bagels were, or what “lox” was (smoked salmon for the uninitiated). Yeah, there are small differences… always saying hello to people in France, for instance, or knowing that a French waiter's idea of good service is getting food to a table as soon as it is ready so it is the best quality, while walking past three other tables that want to place an order, but if you realize those differences exist, it just isn’t a big deal. Yeah, there are frustrations everywhere. Wait in long lines at the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) in LA and it is just as frustrating as going to a store that's closed for lunch in France. My understanding is that the French hate the bureaucracy as much as immigrants, and complain about it as well, but… just realize that it exists and you’re not going to be able to do anything about it. And that, “ce n’est pas possible” is often just a starting point. I find annoying tourist behavior in LA just as annoying as I find tourist behavior in France annoying (and I’m a tourist there). Standing in the middle of the sidewalk to take a picture, standing on the left of an escalator so people can’t walk by, walking four across the sidewalk so no one can walk by, and on and on. French is considered one of the “easy” languages that takes less time than, say, learning Mandarin, and so is English. But both have issues with not pronouncing words as they're spelled (for those native English speakers having problems with French, think of “though” and “through” and how saying them makes zero sense, and then realize that French isn’t any WORSE, just different, and that you have to just practice until it is second nature). I don’t think my French is very good, though I've been told (by some French people) that it is; I have trouble finding words, and no, I'm not translating from English to French unless I'm specifically translating. I test poorly (A2) because my spelling has become terrible and I can’t do those “fill in the blank with the right word” questions even in English. But I don’t read French websites translated (even the obscure government ones) and can read just about anything in a French magazine and get the gist of it. I tend to watch French movies and videos with FRENCH subtitles on, but then my ears ring and I watch English TV with English subtitles as well. Most embarrassing “trying to speak French” moment was probably trying to explain why my wife wanted a suppository for constipation to a French-only pharmacist. Those aren’t words you use often, or learn in school. I don’t say any of this because I'm some genius or something special, but just that I realize that not everyone is the same and not every PLACE is the same, and you'll be a lot happier and a lot better off if you just “go with the flow” and accept the differences for what they are.
"Cultural iceberg", LOL. I've been using the term "epiculture" for what you call 'the part of the iceberg above the water', but that iceberg metaphor is more effective, I think.
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It should be noted that there is plenty of good food available in the USA.
This happens here in the USA. One woman thought moving to New York City would be like the TV shows and movies, NO ONE should base life decisions on what is, by definition, fake. A TV show or movie would not be fun to watch if it were realistic. She mentioned one specific TV show which (it starts with the S word in case YT would not like that) surprised me because people don't particularly act ethically in that show yet she was both using this for her model and expecting it to actually be like that IRL. Personally, I think big city living is over-rated the world over. One can visit a big city for the museums, etc but living there would never appeal to me. Oddly, most big city residents never go to the stuff that is unique about a big city in a positive like the museums but DO go to the stuff in big cities that is shallow or destructive.
In the USA, saying something like hello is more the norm outside the huge cities.
American Expat living in Paris 5th for 5 years during which period I have never found but kindness, openness, and friendliness from the Parisians. Start every interaction with bonjour or bonsoir..and I never speak English and always try my broken-ass French. But get used to industrial strikes, demonstrations, and everyone always complains how bad things are.. c'est tout..😊
I remember my first visit to Paris when I was 13 years old. My dad was a visiting professor at the medical university, and while he was in meetings, I was free to shop and explore along the Champs-Élysées. So there I was, this very young American girl, with braces on her teeth, who spoke only a tiny bit of French that I had learned in middle school. I will never forget how wonderful the people were! Perhaps they loved that I was such a young girl making an effort to speak their language, but I will never forget their warmth and kindness.❤
Such a sweet story! Thank you for sharing it here :)
I'm a retired American expat who moved to Aix-en-Provence 8 years ago. I love France; the people, food, culture, history, and the countryside. Truthfully, I don't want live anywhere else. When I go back to the US every 2 years to see my kids, I can't wait to leave.
Love reading this! Thanks for watching!!
I'm a semiretired American expat living in or near Paris for 16 years. I agree with how you feel about the US. And Lucile, I appreciate how much thought you're putting into this. I would add, if you come to France expecting your American (or Japanese or Brazilian or whatever) values and culture to translate here, it won't serve you well at all. It's simplistic, but there is much truth in the saying " when in Rome, do as the Roman's do".
You left your kids to move to another country but go back now and then to visit them? Someone give this guy a dad-of-the-year trophy..
That is wonderful !
I enjoy visiting France and my Daughters
Study French very seriously .
But please do not vote in the U.S. anymore .
I do not want the government control that France has.
Do you know of any online communities where Americans can learn about French culture and some language perhaps? I am from Chicago but hope to retire in France. I need to overcome the feeling that it's such a big task😊
I am an American that has lived in the countryside in the Southwest near Toulouse for going on three years. The Occitanie region is beautiful with many medieval villages, farms, orchards, vineyards and the people are very nice, they even insist on practicing their English with me when I am trying to speak French. I love the French countryside, the French country lifestyle and visiting all of the local, little villages. One thing that I tell other Americans that have only been to Paris is this. "Thinking that Paris represents all of France and all of the French people is like thinking that New York City represents all of America and all Americans".
Happy to read that you like my region, I grew up in Toulouse! :)
French here. How true.
Canadian living in the USA here, despite having grown up watching US television and sharing similar culture and language it is still a culture shock. Every culture has its differences and ways of doing things. I lived in Greece for a few years and had to learn a new way of interacting with people. You go with an open mind, and try to remember they were there before you arrived. Adapt and assimilate.
Canadian who has lived in the states for years. you can get "reshocked". Just moved to the Bay area for work. NOT a hint of Xmas. IKEA has no Xmas decorations, not one.. looking at the clientele, i could see why. Some houses have decorations but at work, Christmas is considered "personal day off" . i am 61. One thing the English and the French Canadians agreed on when i was young was the whole week off between Christmas and New Year was off. It was a Canadian culture until the mid 1990s when lots of new Canadians to be were invited.
Yep. I'm an American who moved to small town Ontario to live with my Canadian spouse. I had a lot of culture shock.
@@alexwyler4570 What is the Bay area ?
@@alexwyler4570Not taking that week off for 20+ yrs hasn't been an issue for me, but I am still annoyed by it.
It is the part of Northern California near San Francisco.
I traveled alone in France and one experience I remember and cherish is when fellow lavarie patrons helped me with a broken dryer because I didn’t speak enough french to call the help line! Granted, it would affect them all when it was their turn to dry their clothes, but they were kind and patient and gracious when they saw I was getting flustered and confused (cell service was also out for Americans in Europe, so I had no way to open a translate app. I was stuck with what I remembered). This was in Bordeaux. I will never forget them ❤
This is so sweet!! I love when kind strangers help you when you're in a different country!!
I have to admit, that as someone who has limited French language skills, and does not live there but has visited Paris, Northern France (Arras, Cambrais, Albert area) and Eastern France (Strasbourg), I have only ever had good and friendly interactions with all the French people I have met, and have made some good friends.
I moved to Paris 4 years ago and don't regret it a bit. Magnificent city with energetic and friendly....yes friendly people.
Lucile, the French girl, so sweet and petite, Moved back to France, where life is a treat. But oh, the surprises she had to explain, To those who found France a bit of a pain.
"Bonjour," she said, "is a must every day, And don't you dare rush, take time to say. The shops close at noon, for a leisurely lunch, And Sundays are quiet, no shopping to crunch.
The bread is divine, but don't ask for toast, And tipping's a no-no, it's not like the coast. The language, oh dear, can be quite a test, But try your best, and you'll be impressed.
The bureaucracy's slow, and the queues never end, But patience, my friend, is a virtue to tend. The wine flows like water, the cheese is a dream, But watch out for strikes, they're more common than cream.
So if you can handle these quirks with a smile, France will enchant you, mile after mile. Lucile's little tips, with a wink and a cheer, Make living in France a joy, never fear!" ❤❤❤
A+, good job.
I'm so impressed by how thoughtful and 'deep' your videos are. I'm a retired film teacher and visited Paris once a long time ago. I mostly know French culture through French films which I love, through reading etc. I like your metaphor of the iceberg with so much about the deep culture below the surface. Two of my favorite films are based on the memoirs of Marcel Pagnol: 'My Father's Glory' and 'My Mother's Castle' (1990). And a few days ago I discovered there is a new film that is a remake of part of the same memoir: The Time of Secrets (2022, available on Amazon Prime in the US). Of course, the stories are set in the early 20th century before WWI and they bring to life paintings by Renoir. But they show the class system, the importance of education and religion which are still a part of the 'deep' culture. Thanks again for your wonderful videos which are so illuminating!
Yes some of it’s still true like the class,system, although the criteria have changed.
But religion, no : it’s difficult to imagine for an American but france is one of the most de-christanized country in Europe, and therefore in the world.
Also, even among the families that still practice -5% of the population-, it’s viewed as rude and embarrassing to flaunt your religion openly : faith has become a totally [rivate matter, and people talking openly about it are viewed as hypocritical and ultimately pharisians.
There was (maybe still is) a non stop flight between Seattle and CDG. It's 10 hrs. But what is so fun is that if you want to spend a weekend in Paris, you can leave Seattle Friday Afternoon, and arrive in CDG at 8am Sat. You can then spend two days in Paris, and get on your return flight Monday around noon, chase the sun back, and arrive Monday in Seattle also at the same time as you left.
Huh - good for a 20 year old who doesn't suffer jet lag and has huge amounts of energy.
And for someone who doesn't care about carbon footprints or preserving the planet. (I'm not saying never to fly, but making such a long trip for only two days, it's not a good idea!
Also, Paris deserves better)
Back in 2018, I went to La Rochelle on the coast of Bay of Biscay. There were delays with my work and ended up spending 3 weeks instead of 3 days. What a wonderful place with the nicest people you could imagine. Had a blast. I was a real ding dong that only got by with bon jour and merci and it worked.
Mexican here! I think it would be incredible if you talked about culture in every french region.
It's French culture everywhere 😂
There are huge differences between big cities and country towns or villages. Between the Northern part, more Germanic and the South, more Latin. Between the West, Celtic and maritime, and the East, industrial and mountainous. And some regions are not sure they are even French.
I feel like a lot of Americans don't understand how crucial the language factor is, if you're thinking about moving to another country. The error a lot of people make is, visit the country on vacation, go to all of the fun touristy areas where the majority of workers, tour guide folks, etc. speak English, and then come back thinking they can move there and get by with just English. Certainly not the case! Thank you as always for another insightful video! Can't wait to see the content that 2025 will bring! I definitely need to check out that footwear brand☺☺
Some people (in a strange way related to English as a first language) seem to think that all languages sound like loud English with a reduced vocabulary in an aggressive tone with some waving of the hands on top...
Joyeuse Fêtes Lucile. Merci Beaucoup 🙌
Merci ! Joyeuses fêtes à toi aussi :)
I’m a true L.A. guy, born in the U.S., VERY American. I’ve been to France 3 times, from Nice to Paris to Bordeaux. I’ve ALWAYS had a wonderful time!! I try to speak a bit of French (4 years of classes when I was in school years ago), and I’ve found the French people (AND Parisians!) to be very nice, and accommodating. However, I know other Americans who’ve gone to Paris, and French towns, who have hated the experience……..but those people are VERY American, meaning they don’t try to speak French, they dress like they’re still in Montana, or Illinois, they won’t try French foods, and don’t understand why the French aren’t more like them!! (Ugly American syndrome). ….It’s all about you’re ATTITUDE, and accepting a different culture!!! 🤷🏼♂️😎🥂
I agree with you here, you can't fight cultural differences, you have to embrace them!
It is not just Americans who can behave that way. If you understand other languages, you will hear the same thing from peoples visiting the US too. I know of Chinese visitors who will only go to Chinese restaurants while visiting America, speak very broken English to the point of sounding rude (sadly, they probably did not realize it). I have also encountered someone insisting on finding a Mexican restaurant in the middle of Nicosia, Cyprus because he was confused about Mediterranean culture vs. Hispanic culture. There will be cultural boors from all over the world, and you just hope not to have to deal with them.
From LA, one time I met a guy from Minnesota in Vienna who was freaked out by seeing all the Turkish immigrant women with head coverings. Like al Qaeda was outside the hotel. And this was before 09/11.
@ …….I know people in Montana who won’t eat ANY vegetables (except potatoes). Seriously, NO veggies, ever! Not even a salad!! They call vegetables “scary stuff”. (That’s why they’re called Flyover States I guess! 🤷🏼♂️😂).
@@eddieg6436 Why eat salads when you can have moose and bear???LOL! 😂🐻
I love watching your videos, you are super intelligent and really insightful on your observations.
I loved my visit to Paris 20 years ago. I used “French for Dummies” to get a head start on the language. I can’t wait to come back and visit the smaller towns. I am retired now and would like to spend some quality time.
I learned French in high school, and have visited Paris France once. I was able to leverage my limited training in order to check into my hotel and order food. I enjoyed my visit and look forward to returning. The sentiment that Americans don't like the French is hopefully a small percentage. I enjoyed my visit to Paris. Additionally, my co-worker, who is from France, had a great sense of American humor, and understood it. Also, this individual was extremely savvy in understanding our company's benefits and making sure employees where getting the most out of the benefits (pay, vacation, health care, vacation pay, etc.) , where my American co-workers where so oblivious to these things. He was also very detailed. I appreciated him for the unique skills he brought to the job.
Thank you so much for your donation!! Appreciate you!
Great video 👍 Also in the french speaking of Switzerland "Bonjour"is also important 😊
The real struggle of living in France is resisting eating pastries every meal 😆
It's quite tough!
TOO TRUE! Though you do offset them a bit by walking so much.
I moved from the UK to Lyon back in 2018 and France is now my home. I love it here and when I got back to the UK to visit family it doesn't feel like home. I can't speak of Paris obviously but Lyon is love ❤
Lyon is a great city, and perfectly located in the country : not far from the mediterranean sea, not far from the Alps, from Paris, Italy or Switzerland. Good choice !
@@heliedecastanet1882 Yes I adore living in Lyon. I don't live in the very centre (Bellecour) but I can get the metro into Bellecour in around 7 minutes so hardly an issue. Public transport here is super. Quality of life is wonderful. In my 6 years I have personally experience no problems with crime or antisocial behaviour. The reason I moved from the UK is partly because of Brexit but also I was violently assaulted in the UK when I was stabbed (thankfully not life threatening injury) in London. I wanted a better quality of life so when a job opportunity came my wifes way I said "yes let's just try it and see how it works out, we can always move back if it's awful" but it is without question the best decision of our lives. My son just started college (11yo) and is fully bilingual so goes to an international school for mixed French and English education. We have a lovely home roughly 2.5x the size of our UK home for the same price. We do pay slightly more in taxes when you look at it at face value but we actually have more disposable income as those "hidden taxes" the UK has (i.e council tax, road tax, more expensive food, clothes, services, etc) are different here so while it may _look like_ we pay more taxes in reality we don't which is something people don't factor in when looking at "cost of living and taxes" as a whole.
As for the French people they're truly wonderful. At least here in Lyon. I have not had a single bad experience with anyone. Everyone is just so friendly. I get invited to play pétanque to strangers who quickly become friends 😄Our neighbours are all lovely. The work live balance is truly life changing. Work comes behind the actual important parts of like like family, health and happiness.
is France perfect? Lol of course not. But they get far more right than they get wrong. You could not get me to move back to the UK unless you could give me the same quaity of life and a lot of money so I never had to work again or worry about getting health care, etc.
Oh and French healthcare is phenominal. People always try to pick it apart but trust me when you need to use it you quickly realise the UK and US systems are no way near as good. The data backs this up but many UK and US people will try and deny it having never experienced it out of some like of elitest protectionism mentality about their own system by denying it needs reform.
So yeah France isn't _the_ best place on earth but it is easily _one of_ the best places without question.
I've never been to Paris before and I've heard good things instead of the bad things there! It's the city of love ❤and it has great things that other people will enjoy! I love and enjoy watching your content throughout these pass few months Lucile & keep up the great work! I wish you and your family Merry Christmas 🎁🎄🎁and Happy Holidays from London, England! 🎅🎄☃✨
As an Englishman visiting France i noticed you always get a hearty ''Bonjour!'' and it's rude not to respond even though the French aren't into small talk generally as much as Anglo-American people are....
I gave up on BNP Paribas and opened a Revolut account. It was ridiculous.
This is the most interesting segment on your channel so far for myself. I got a great deal out of it, especially reagrding work culture differences between France and the USA. Thanks!!!
Lucile, thanks for this video. Can't imagine folks are moving to a place and trying to make it into the place they moved FROM. Ugh vive la différence! FUN Fact: Old skool New Orleans we. wouldn't dare walk into a place and not "speak" "Hello, Good Morning, How u doin?or somethin!. It is considered "il-Mannered", disrespectful and makes people say "Who raised you?" Culturally you represent your parents and in NOLA we wouldn't dare disgrace our family name like that.Not all of the US is the same.
Can't image moving to a place without studying the deep history of it. 💝💝💝
If you don't actually appreciate the breadth and depth of French culture or have any of your own, the French will pick it up and treat you accordingly. A revers, if you have manners and kindess, they will also pick it up and you will be treated with great kindness and civilisation. Vive la France!
I totally agree that complainers do not realize that they are the rude ones in the first place. It happened to me that a person from a neighboring country, with the usual rivalries, started saying bad things about my fellow citizens. I was trying to be particularly nice to avoid the usual jokes, and then I have to stop myself from telling him, he is the idiot, not my fellow citizens and not his fellow citizens. It's the complainer the rude one who starts the fire and they blame it on the others. They totally deserve to be sent for a walk. I don't do it because I don not like talk to snakes, but if someone else sends them for a walk, it's fine, they asked for it.
I’ve visited Paris, Reims, Strasbourg, Nice, Lyon, Arles, Avignon, Provence region, Vienne, Perouges, and multiple other small towns. I have loved every minute in France. I would love to move there but am doubtful of my ability to improve upon my basic French enough to be fluent. So I’m planning to move to Spain upon retirement, as I can speak Spanish a little better, with trips to France and Italy. Best of both worlds. 😃
Absolutely spot on ... Spent time in Megeve and Aix Les Bains ... Beautiful people and culture
I 'm Français living in Australia (since 1982) and when I go back to Fr for "holidays" or other things, I have that quick "honeymoon" for a week ( ho the pastry shops😛) then all what I dislike in France (particularily the BUREAUCRATIE) begins to weigh on my shoulders... In some places in bad weather I feel totally depressed because it brings back old memories. The worst part is that it is for me like another country. Apart from visiting chateaux and eating good old gatronomie, I feel I have no more business in France.. I love your videos
Great vid Lucile. For me learning another language, you know you are progressing when you can understand subtle jokes.. BTW you have this whole Eva Green vibe going on
Bravo!
Love France and the French. Have several French friends and acquaintances. Been there 4 times, the first three to the south, Nice, Montpelier, Ardèche, Toulouse, Pau, Bordeaux. Always heard some negative things about Paris and Parisians. Never believed it. Was in Paris for two weeks this year. Absolutely loved it, especially Montmartre, where we stayed. Great town and people. Was treated like royalty.
You made excellent points and it’s so good of you to educate people this way. What you said is true for moving anywhere. Even when I moved from eastern Canada to western Canada there was cultural shock. My first trip to France I didn’t know about the importance of greetings. Learning about that made my other trips so much better. It also helped in Mexico, where it’s the same. You’re considered extremely rude if you skip greetings.
J'ai jamais haï le fait de vivre en France .
C'est littéralement le plus beau pays que j'aie jamais visté .
The main culture shock to me in France was seeing how low the average person's spice tolerance is. It took a good deal of effort to find restaurants that served anything approaching heat. That isn't to say French cuisine is bland, it isn't, but sometimes I do crave some heat which wasn't so common there.
Ex-Manhattanite prepping for a move to Nice. I expect strikes, foolishness and people who want to be left alone. Same as NYC. As I'm retired I don't need to worry about the daily grind, which is a relief. Wait until you have to figure out water heaters in Singapore, lol. I can deal with anything at this point. The package thing will irritate me but I'm sure I will figure it out. I'm looking forward to a more relaxed way of life and the ability to travel the area more easily.
My dear Lucile, you mentioned that it is hard to make friends in France.....well I am born and raised in Germany and I live in Gascony now since 1999..... my children are born here my wife is french and is is the friendliest place on earth.....I would not want to live somewhere else...... I just have a friend from Sweden here (I spent 3 years there) and he confirmed to me that: It is a difference from night to day here in the South-West compared with Sweden..... You should go to Northern -Europe and than come back to France..... People are were warm, open and welcoming here....but you are absolutely right: Someone has to speak french if he wants to live here !
Not hard to make friends, rather time consuming, so to speak ^^
Real friendship means a lot to us...I mean my true friends could risk their life for me and so would I. Therefore, you can easily understand new comers won't be friends.
Takes a lot of time and shared good or bad days. A lot.
It's a scale that goes from love to hate. Friendship is love without sex, it's the same strong feeling and bond to someone. Can't be given straight away to perfect stranger.
And once you've done it, once you're true friend to a French person, it's a lifetime sentence ^^
The French have their own idea of politeness 😄
For example in Germany it is not mandatory to start a conversation by saying hello. You just start talking. But you must not leave without saying Bye. That would be rude.
In France it's the other way round.
Such a great video! 🌟
Bravo! This isn't just about travel, it's anthropology. "The study of humans". Universal laws of human nature are here. Thank you for sharing your intelligent, questioning curious mind. I learn a lot. You are a bright light in the world. Subscribed❤.
I guess it's hard for every english speaking people to learn another langage: they believe too much that everybody on earth shall speak the same langage than them
Great video. You touch on many differences between both countries. I am French and I have lived in the US (California) for many years. I would have a difficult time adjusting to living in France again on a permanent basis. I love to visit and be a tourist. I can enjoy the best the country can offer. Living in France would require too much of an adjustment and frustration with many aspects of French life i.e the bureaucracy, the customer service, the weird hours, the banking system ( the bank employee calling me to give information on a deposit in my checking account - where the money came from and the “coordonnées” of the sender). No MLS to make it convenient to buy a house or an apartment.
France is a beautiful country and has a lot to offer but I am always glad to come “home” after a visit.
I've been to France 13 times and I think that living in France 3:months a year (a long vacation) to start with is enough time.
Je discute régulièrement avec des compatriotes américains qui envisagent de vivre en France ou en Italie, et ils ont la même idée naïve que l'on peut apprendre une langue par immersion, comme s'il s'agissait d'une sorte de magie. En respirant l'air et en buvant l'eau, la capacité à parler la langue étrangère va arriver sans effort. Apprendre une langue demande du travail, de l'énergie et du temps. Et on ne peut pas apprendre une langue à fond sans apprendre la culture.
Thank you so much for this video . I am moving to Paris next year . This video was very interesting and informative. I have been very worry about how would I adjust . Thank you so much for this video !! .
The US has different cultures. If you are in New York City. You say hello. They look at you and say, “What!”. People in the south are friendly. Most non cities are very friendly in the US.
I visited Perros-Guirec on the coast. I experienced Escargot near this city for the first time. I will admit that I didn't understand to leave the hotel key at the hotel, but the nearby areas were very friendly. This might be because they are used to tourists from the UK, but it was still pleasant. I don't have a lot of experience with Paris, but the suburbs were nice.
As we say here in the US, The grass is always greener on the other side : ) Great video always!!!
We have the exact same saying in France...and I bet all around the world as this is such a relevant one ^^
People in California address people with “hello” where I lived for 30 years. NY is less likely to do so. Montana and other Midwest cities are friendlier too. When relocating back to NY area people tend to think I’m weird for being more open and friendly 🤷🏼♀️. My opinion and experiences
Fantastic video Lucille. Yes, our visits to france has raised so many variables. Paris was wonderful, the people were so welcoming on the whole. Saint Malo was a challenge and an interaction nearly come to bliws. Colioure was beautiful but the locals were reluctant to interact with Brits. Ouistreham is wonderful and have visited many times. Canne is challenging tho. Of course I can say the same of uk, London, Cornwall, lake district are sooo different. Love France and French people, well most of them😊😊😊😊❤
Lauren Bacall wrote in her autobiography that she loved Paris - And going to London after Paris took some getting used to - but she ended up loving London as much as Paris.
As for Sir Laurence Olivier, in his memoirs he wrote that he couled never decide which city he found the most beautiful, speaking of Paris and St-Petersburg (Russia) Having travelled to both cities, I agree with Sir Olivier, cannot make a choice.
Cannot wait to discover London, soon I hope
Bonjour, Lucile (See? I paid attention to your previous videos!):
Faites-vous une vidéo de la restorátion de la Cathédrale Notre-Dame de Paris, s'il vous plaît? Aussi, pour quois je ne remarque pas beaucoup des fleur de lys quand je regarde la media de Paris ces derniers jours? Merci pour ta considération!
-Les Voitures de Ciel (Flying Cars)
Where is this place at 2:43?
This the palace of the Popes, in the city of Avignon, on the Rhône river, Southwest of France.
I was in Paris just at this May, before Olympic games. And it's funny how this city looks familiar after my Odesa, Ukraine. Especially by design of buildings of Central Odesa and French Boulevard of Odesa. But moreover, many of Paris features are matchable with Odesa. Depressive districts of Paris aren't so afraid after Odesa's Duke park or Jolio-Curie street.
About people I can also admit that not to much Odesa-people speaks English (except 30 and less), but foreigner must know that not everybody Odesa local speaks Ukrainian by different reasons, one of which is "people are rude". And the main problem of Odesa and little bit Paris too, that people not even try to dig deeper in culture and history of the cities. Most people really thinking that attractiveness just fallen from skies on their places.
In the end, maybe I wrong about full similarity of Paris and Odesa, I felt enough comfortable in Paris, which wish for everyone. ❤
People may underestimate the depth and breadth of behavior and attitudes encompassed by culture. We take in culture from the moment we're born -- it includes nearly instinctual behaviors like how close we stand and how we face each other, when we raise our voices, when we perceive hostile or insulting behaviors from others, etc. The amount of psychological distance and formal "honor" we give to teachers or supervisors is culturally influenced. How quickly we move from conflict to violence is a part of culture. Culture can even determine how much literal explanation you might need (versus picking up on nonverbal clues) in order to understand a task. In fact, a large share of what goes into socialization is absorbing and wielding the norms of one's culture so that we function well in that culture. So, no American should assume that French culture is "like" ours. Same with British culture, Thai culture, Senegalese culture, etc. And the same goes for people encountering Americans.
Reads a book about Sartre and de Beauvoir.
Looks for an apartment in Saint-Germain-des-Prés.
Wait, it costs how much??? 😉
Bonjour! French suburbs look like American ones 🤣🤣🤣...and that shower handle on that bath is RARE. Most of the shower settings are a knob on top of the bath faucet or is a separate control on the wall
Some general tips about living in the EU - The least bureaucratic countries are the Nordic ones. If you want to be an employee, the highest net salaries (and cost of living) are in Switzerland, Luxembourg & Norway. If you want to be self employed, the lowest combo of income taxes + social security taxes are in the former Eastern Bloc. Easiest places to 'fit in' if you like to drink alcohol are EVERYWHERE! If you're a teetotaler then.... you're out of luck.
I feel like France is a beautiful country to travel to but not exactly the best place to live. As a Canadian, I noticed this by observing that there’s a lot more French people moving to Canada than Canadians moving to France for a multitude of reasons.
This Canadian left Canada 30 years ago and l appreciate life more here. I live on the ltalian border, am trilingual and find that life is 100% better here. As you say, l am the minority as it is usually the other way around.
Good to you🤣
@@philippedombinou8589Good FOR you.
When I visited France, outside of Paris, I found the people to be very nice. I think Parisians come off as being rude because they’re just from a big city. Big city people in America can be rude. My hardest thing would be learning the language. I’m not very good at that. I tried my whole life to learn Spanish. I know a lot of words, but I just can’t put it together in sentences. Maybe if I was immersed in a new country for six months or a year I gradually pick it up. After I retire, I will try that.
As a French person who has travelled a lot I have noticed that there is one thing that Americans and French people have in common:
Both are generally friendly and open with foreigners... in their respective countries..., but as soon as they are abroad they tend to be often a bit arrogant and pretentious, thinking that coming from a superior country or culture the world must adapt to them rather than the other way around.
When you have this kind of attitude you can only be received with distrust by the person in front of you and in return you will retain a feeling of rudeness from the locals. Basic psychology.
Great video! Valid points, very well explained (oops, bonjour Lucile - I almost forgot!).
A tiny feedback about your graph: the word is adaptation (not adaption), but otherwise yes, your English is great.
As Greek I think that Greece and France share a lot in lifestyle and what they consider important...
"excpect to put alot of your personal self into work... lots of socializing with coworkers involving drinking...workplaces are very hierarchical"
- Me, crylaughing in Japanese.
“Honeymood” phase. So cute 😉
That's a common term for seeing a new place with rose-coloured glasses.
@@SchlichteToven Thamks….Never heard of it but makes sense.
It was so wonderful that the French ALWAYS said bonjour! I have only been to Lourdes. The French people there were wonderful. The food in Lourdes was disappointing though.
Another difference is the strictness of the military. U.S. armed forces includes significant autonomy in their personal lives. French Foreign Legion culture is similar to a minimum security prison with restrictions and regulations.
I've been through CDG at least 20 times and every time something was on strike.
The worst one for me was when the air caterers struck and they had to get us these god awful meal trays, they were like MREs though probably worse.
Still, go on strike. Get the stuff you deserve. Us Americans should do the same.
Also the stereotypical French rudeness, I've only experienced in Paris. On another trip through CDG my flight was late arriving so I missed my connection and the Air France lady was so polite and helpful in getting me accomodated.
1:22 That street scene looks like a french version of the infamous Breezewood exit photo from the US that so many foreigners love to bash the US over.
So it’s pretty much common sense stuff. Every country is different, and moving to a different country means there is a period of adjustment, and that adjustment can be hard. No place is perfect. There are pros and cons to just about every society
For washing clothes, if you need a dryer, go to a laundromat. There is one, not too far from Bastille.
I believe that Hollywood is part of the problem. They tend to portray places using stereotypical perceptions, and many don't travel overseas enough to know any better. Anyways love your content and would love to visit France one day.
Christmas traditions within 20 years could disappear in France. They did in the Bay area of the USA my edit and for the last 5 years, the Christmas traditions are being closed down in Germany
You can also live a culture shock even if you move in a place where they speak the same language: my French husband when he moved to Quebec, Canada 😊
I only spent a few days in Paris in my life, sadly, but I was surprised at how nice the people were. The only city that shocked me was London, people were so rude! I suppose Americans were disliked more there, but this was way back in 2011
Everybody has their own anecdotal evidence that one particular city is the actual rude one. I found most Londoners (and everywhere else in England) super helpful. People would go out of their way to help me find out what train I needed and helped me carry luggage up the underground stairs (and didn't steal it at the top). If you applied the same principles of this video to England, people would have to conclude that you were rude first and people picked up on this and you didn't understand English culture and that's why people were rude to you.
To be fair, that type of showerhead you describe around the seven minute mark is an unusual type. I'm an American and that screwed me up but good the first time I encountered that at a motel when I was in my 40s.
Attitude Of Gratitude For 👌 Outstanding Video 🇫🇷 🇫🇷 🇫🇷 🇫🇷 🇫🇷 🇫🇷 Viva La France 🇫🇷 😀 😄 😊 Thanks 😊
Merci for watching my video :)
It always amazes me how many people would hope to move and live in another country and not prepare to learn or speak the language there. For any culture, if you cannot speak their language, you will be missing out on the actual interaction. So much goes on in daily life that you cannot comprehend without the most basic understanding of the language. Plus, it can also save your life in an urgent situation if you can tell someone exactly what has happened. It is one thing to order a sandwich in French, but a whole different matter if you had a fall and need to tell the responder that you cannot feel your toes anymore. I was once travelling in Asia and got very sick. When I got to Japan, I quickly asked to see a doctor and since I could describe the symptoms exactly in Japanese, he prescribed the correct medication plus more instructions on how to look after myself. Good job with your videos that cover realities, not just the fun things!
I hope you understand not everyone can gain fluency even after years of trying. And you are assuming a 60 year old American retiree will devote energy to doing that rather than enjoying their passions after 40 years of work.
@@vmoses1979 honestly, for a language like french, you can do 20mn of duolingo a day, just to get the very basics, in a few months you'll have good basics, and you'll recognize patterns around you, then your french will progress effortlessly
PS: I realize my message may seem rude: this is not a "you MUST learn french" message, just a tip if you don't have so much time, duolingo makes it easy and fun, and you'll learn enough to get by, which will make your stay much easier
@@vmoses1979 That's when you hear ol' guys hollering around in some foreign country louder and louder in English. Good luck with that.
Ok. So, this is probably just my own ignorance, but I'm wondering why recently, everytime you mention that you used to work a corporate job in investment banking, you show the same two photos of you under the scaffolding. Don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining. They're great pictures, and you look gorgeous in them, but I'm just not sure if I'm personally picking up on the connection between them and investment banking. I also don't really know NYC, though. Am I supposed to recognize one of the buildings in the background? Is that it?
I have never seen a shower that works by pulling on the faucet. I'd be stymied too.
i’ve been thinking of moving to france in general after school in the us. but how to french people live if their salaries are so low but they have high costs of living?
It really depends where you live. You can live very comfortably on an average wage in a lot of places. It just won't have everything you would want and get in Paris for example however you will have many other advantages
For starters don't go expecting to live an American life in Paris. You likely won't be able to afford a car, but there is great public transit. You drink at home with friends and go to a club and buy 1 drink. You get smaller food portions that aren't overflowing but portioned properly, with excellent fresh ingredients well prepared. Learn to live like the locals.
@@pwp8737 I feel like I can adapt to this mostly . I’m going to a university in a city and the public transit isn’t safe and dirty. But usually the trains, trolleys, and buses come on time. I don’t know how public transit is in France, hopefully it’ll be more safe and clean.
We live confortably, even with low wages. The median wealth in France is higher that the median in the US.
It’s crazy the first thing that comes to minds in the US is money, money, money! French citizen earn less money than Americans in general but they wont have to pay extortionate prices like hospital bills, student fees, childcare cost, renting costs etc. I can tell you making about 2k€ outside of Paris living a normal life you certainly have a better quality of life than any americans making more money. Luigi Maggione does it ring bell? Tryna see Europe from a different perspective. I do have a house with a pool, i can afford summer breaks with my fam, did go to Japan twice, Dubai. Im not working for a tech firm btw. I used to live in NYC and London in the past. My quality of life has gotten better ever since i moved back. US salaries are higher due to high cost of living. French wages are lower as they wont have to worry about student debts, crazy hospital bills. If your household makes about 4k€ youll definitely will have a better life than any US households making 10k$!!
I think the reason why you feel there’s still so much to discover culturally in the US is because, there’s actually nothing to discover, it’s kinda like you’re searching for something that doesn’t exist… 😅haha
*unless you’re talking about Native Americans
*It was a joke…!* (but all jokes hold some truth behind them)
The fact that your boyfriend doesn't have a French bank account is shocking. There are so many things that require a rib whether it's getting a carte Vitale or paying for phone and electric or paying la caution for an apartment. Not to mention paying taxes. Getting a bank account should be done day one.
I lived in Paris for 5 years about a decade ago - had a French job, had French taxes and they still wouldn’t. I had to get paid into my revolut account (an int’nl bank), tbh that was the beginning of the end for me lol
Also living in France is more of a grind than the US. Forget the US longer working hours. In France, between domestic responsibilities, which tend to be more arduous because we lack things like dryers, administrative bs, transportation and jobs, we work longer and harder than Americans. Also French universities and jobs tend to foster more competition than the US, competiton that can get nasty. Look no further than the concours we have.
I'm British and had to open a French bank account when I bought a house there. The first one I tried demanded extra paperwork even though I had carefully researched what I needed and brought it along. Then the "agent immobilier" who sold me the house came to my rescue: he came with me to another bank and when they made things difficult he told them I was going back to England in a few days and would go to another bank if they didn't make it easy for me. This effectively cut through the red tape.
On the positive side, I've found you get much better customer service once you've succeeded in opening the account. There are much more branches than in the UK, and everyone has their own "conseilleur" who you can meet face to face to discuss any issues. In the UK most things are done online, and getting to speak to anyone at all is an uphill struggle.
@@SFRZRD That's not possible. You can get a bank account in France as a sans papier at la banque postale.
I love your videos and think you are adorable. I love France, but I have to point out that we absolutely do not have free healthcare. We pay extremely high taxes to pay for our healthcare. As for the fabulous food, culture, beautiful cities, etc., I totally agree.
Well, thanks for the clarifications about the fact that things tend to have a cost... "free healthlcare" because it's the same thing than when you call the police, you don't have to pay them a fee or have an insurance or something to have them making their job, I guess. You don't have to pay a fee to use the street your home is connected to. You pay taxes, for all that and more, yes, and social security is supposed to use all its weight to limit prices and excessive profit-taking by the various health players. The same way you pay for the police, the army, etc etc etc... In the end, it's the access to the service which is "free", so to speak.
For me the cultural shock was seeing how France has been Africanized. If you want to live among French people, you'll need to go to the rural areas like Creuse, Corrèze, Cantal.
Reality Check from Lucile: Another great corrective to all the expat rah-rah hoo-hah online, courtesy of a first-rate cross-cultural communicator and her sponsors. This may be of particular interest to the étoile-struck "Emily In Paris" audience. That said, if tu fais le saut, she's your wingman virtuel[le]. Bravo encore, Lucile, pour cette vidéo pleine d'astuces pratiques et futées et de votre sagesse en général -comme d'hab.
People with high expectations will hate France so it's all about being open minded & just embracing it as is, which applies to anywhere & everywhere
It's one thing to visit another country briefly, for pleasure, work or to see friends and family, or even to live there for a few months in a rented apartment on an extended visa. You don't have to know much or participate in local bureaucracy, pay most taxes, register with health services, obtain special subsidies, transit cards, deal with rental laws, auto registration, long-term neighbors, employers, colleagues, commutes, shopping, repairs, and so on.
I.e. all the stuff that people who live in them have to deal with, regardless of the country. But move abroad and you'll have to deal with all of this, and then some, at which point it becomes a completely different experience. It can still be richly rewarding, but you're going to have to put much much much more work into it, not everything will be fun and easy, and there will be an extended adjustment period where you question the wisdom of it all.
I've never lived in another, not as an adult at least, but I have moved cross-country in the USA, and that was challenging enough. Moving to another country would likely be way harder, because of the different language, culture, laws, social rules, foods, mentalities, and so on. Especially countries where prices and taxes tend to be higher and everything tends to be smaller and more limited than in the USA, which is most countries.
I don't think I'd hate moving to Paris, I'm pretty adaptable and like challenges, but I also don't think I'd love it enough for it to be worth the hassle and adjustment, especially at this point in my life. I prefer to continue to visit now and then, and let others deal with the day to day stuff. Same could be said about Parisians thinking about moving to the USA. It's not for everyone, and probably not even for most. Trust me, especially these days. 😄
To be fair, for Banks in Europe, having an American customer is a hassle because they have to be strongly transparent with the US government.
On the last minutes: Actually I'd say if you're an international student in the US you'll feel that you fit in very quickly. May be different in a work situation. And Americans adore European accents.
even in your country figuring how to use a shower that isnt yours can be hard 😂😭
I love France, I have visited it many times from Marseille to Strasbourg and I loved it every time, people were very nice, helpful and polite. The rudest people in France in my experience were those who were born in other countries and became French citizens.... their ways are exaggerated particularly if they hold a position of authority....I guess they try too hard to be authentic....
I've spent a lot of time in Paris (9 months on multiple trips across 30 years) and I've never experience rude Parisians. I'm every careful to speak as much French as I can (with the best French accent I can -- not the tacky Americanized French), and when I cannot say what I need to say, I first ask, "Excuse moi, vous parlez Anglais?" And 100% of the time Parisians speak great English to me, and do so in a friendly manner. My hunch is that rude Americans experience rude ... everyone else.
Learning French is not difficult . It is rammed into you at school from age 11 ............and if you go on 6 more years to A-Level , you have a wide experience and springboard to then become fluent . ! It is not a very difficult language , and many words have a Latin root or are recognisable from English .
It's actualy English words that are recognisable from French as English mostly comes from French (you can find a very educative video on this topic on youtube).
I'm French and I advise you to get the hell out of Paris very quickly .
It has changed in 30 years as many great cities.
Go to Switzerland or Austria or Denmark......
Once you are there legally, Ireland is super easy regards bureaucracy.
There's no such thing as “A culture” when you're talking about an entire country. Even a large city like Paris, or Berlin, or LA (where I’m from), you're going to get a ton of subcultures.
I've never had culture shock visiting anywhere - perhaps the most being when I visited North Carolina and nobody had a clue what decent bagels were, or what “lox” was (smoked salmon for the uninitiated). Yeah, there are small differences… always saying hello to people in France, for instance, or knowing that a French waiter's idea of good service is getting food to a table as soon as it is ready so it is the best quality, while walking past three other tables that want to place an order, but if you realize those differences exist, it just isn’t a big deal.
Yeah, there are frustrations everywhere. Wait in long lines at the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) in LA and it is just as frustrating as going to a store that's closed for lunch in France. My understanding is that the French hate the bureaucracy as much as immigrants, and complain about it as well, but… just realize that it exists and you’re not going to be able to do anything about it. And that, “ce n’est pas possible” is often just a starting point.
I find annoying tourist behavior in LA just as annoying as I find tourist behavior in France annoying (and I’m a tourist there). Standing in the middle of the sidewalk to take a picture, standing on the left of an escalator so people can’t walk by, walking four across the sidewalk so no one can walk by, and on and on.
French is considered one of the “easy” languages that takes less time than, say, learning Mandarin, and so is English. But both have issues with not pronouncing words as they're spelled (for those native English speakers having problems with French, think of “though” and “through” and how saying them makes zero sense, and then realize that French isn’t any WORSE, just different, and that you have to just practice until it is second nature).
I don’t think my French is very good, though I've been told (by some French people) that it is; I have trouble finding words, and no, I'm not translating from English to French unless I'm specifically translating. I test poorly (A2) because my spelling has become terrible and I can’t do those “fill in the blank with the right word” questions even in English. But I don’t read French websites translated (even the obscure government ones) and can read just about anything in a French magazine and get the gist of it. I tend to watch French movies and videos with FRENCH subtitles on, but then my ears ring and I watch English TV with English subtitles as well.
Most embarrassing “trying to speak French” moment was probably trying to explain why my wife wanted a suppository for constipation to a French-only pharmacist. Those aren’t words you use often, or learn in school.
I don’t say any of this because I'm some genius or something special, but just that I realize that not everyone is the same and not every PLACE is the same, and you'll be a lot happier and a lot better off if you just “go with the flow” and accept the differences for what they are.
"Cultural iceberg", LOL. I've been using the term "epiculture" for what you call 'the part of the iceberg above the water', but that iceberg metaphor is more effective, I think.