how i knew i was transgender [and some advice on coming out]
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- Опубликовано: 26 сен 2010
- all just personal stories/personal opinion/what i would suggest on the topic.
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It's weird for me because when I was a child I felt like a girl, I used to wear girly clothes and stuff. but now I am trans hffhhfhf
+Sky Potter i used to make people call me garrett and play on sports teams with boys- i literally identified as a boy. but now I'm pretty girly and obsessed with fashion, makeup, and shopping. not that that has to do with gender identity really, but its funny that i changed so much!!
same haha
Same tho
FINALLY someone i can relate to
Leo EXACTLY THE SAME FOR ME
One of the reasons I started suspecting I was a trans guy was because:
•I would be attracted to guys, then be really sad because they weren't gay. But then I realized I was a "girl" and I was like lol wtf no you aren't a guy so that doesn't make you gay what are you thinking brain???
Rt
how are you now?
you are a guy not a girl, if you are born with male genitelia and you can't have kids you are a guy, you can call yourself a girl or a transgender girl but you are not a girl, your bone structure is diffrent, your hormones and so on
@@CroElectroStile gender is not about genitals. Gender is purely a social construction. A gender is assigned a birth in regard of genitals, but in reality, those are 2 totally different concepts.
So, of course, regarding genitals and hormones and all, there will be body differences. But since gender and genitals are NOT linked in whatsoever VALID manner, it is not a problem :)
And furthermore, since gender is purely social, people can choose it, change it, and do whatever they like with it. You could as well. But don't try to forbid this to others because you don't feel the need to explore this yourself.
Regards,
Vesole.
@@vesolev.5608 Yeah you defeated yourself with your own line " of course there will be body difrences" yeas there will, that is why we have genders, bone structure is very real and a biological construction is not a social one, so a man will have denser bones with a better frame for anny kind of sports, saying he is a she will will let him participate with real women! I'ts not let's play a game of men and women it has it's consequences, thinking you are a woman and then presenting as one doesn't make you a woman, i will call you a she if you appear as one, but if you had an operation you better be open with people about it because if this man wants a man , this other guys should know you were born a man. and woman wanting to be men, it's just not going to make you happier , that is stats. it's a mental illness a dysphoria that often sadly ends up in suicide, because most of them are disapointed and they dont get what they wanted because what they wanted was a fairy tale.
There's a really weird noise in the background throughout the video that really hurts my ears.
Same
I hear it too! Strange!
Same
middle school i tried to fit in with everyone and i dressed very very girly because all my friends did.....middle school sucked.
I'm really hesitant about coming out (as ftm) because I'm scared my family's 1.) transphobic af and 2.) insist on calling me princess and stuff like that and don't even accept that I 3.) like girls.
+Cole Alexander Do it, i know exactly how you feel but you will feel so much stronger once you let the world see who you really are.
The same for me as well
Lucas Gabriel If you feel scared or too uncomfortable, I recommend not coming out. You need to make sure you are positive and safe before coming out.
you honestly just explained my life...
Wow, mine too...
FogglyBloggly are you trans?
My body and my mind are the same gender : male. Thank you for telling me your story. At school we learn a lot of stuff that is interesting but not really necessary. I wish they had taught us more about different sexualities such as gay people and transgender people so that we could understand. I was educated in Britain and I learned my religion at home so I never heard all that negative stuff about sex that there is over this side of the pond. Thanks again for telling your story.
Donald Edward Being transgender is not a sexuality. Sexuality is who you are attracted to whereas gender identity is what gnder you identify as. That said, I agree with you that more stuff like this should be taught in schools (I don't live in Britain though).
Your parents should teach you this stuff ffs
you are what my dream man looks like.....
so attractive >_
Alyssa Gartrelle same 😳❤️
Someday, maybe years from now, I'll be able to look back on my own life in this very same way.
And I can't wait.
what happened now?
Cuéntanos , lo lograste?
I'm a mom of a 15 year old and this really helped. Thank you!
I know this is an old video, but it is extremely relevant to me right now. My 18 year-old daughter just came out to me as trans, and how I wish she had talked to me along the way, because I feel extremely blind-sided and have no idea how to process this. Yes, I will support her and use her new name and new pronoun, but she doesn't seem to want to talk to me about it at all, which is difficult because we are 200 miles apart, as she is just starting college, and I feel like I am left here alone to pick up the pieces. Maybe I will share this video with her to let her know that I support her and only want to help.
Linda W. hi! i am only 13 and am trying to come out to my mom as trans.how did she come out?? i don't know how i can and am trying to see how other people did
jodi d She sent me a text. Please don't do that. I don't know your parents, so I can only speak from my experience, but a phone call, however scary, is so much better if you can't or are not ready to speak in person. Give them a chance to digest the information. They may not be initially supportive, but that doesn't mean they don't want to be. Let them know that you are the same child they've always known and loved and that you love and need them and their support. I hesitate giving advice, as this is very new to me as well, but I'm getting there. Best of luck to you. :)
Linda W. ok thanks so much:-)
this video is so damn helpful, I have no idea where I'm going to go at this point in my life and I'm so confused. Now I know that I'm not alone on some things that are happening right now. Thank you so so much.
thanks for this advice, ive been watching alot of transgender videos latley and this helps me kind of understand what I need to do to find out whether or not Im a tranguy. Im starting highschool and ever since i was little i never really fit in. Im going to get some therapy soon so i can figure out what I want and need to live a honest life.
I'm not sure if you grasp the impact this video has on the community. This video has single handedly saved lives; including mine. It showed me hope for my life. Thank you so much.
Now I know what I did wrong when I came out....
om asked about my funny boyish haircut.
I responded with, "oops looks like the barber guy have me a bob cut too short."
Then she said, "Geez he made you look like a boy!"
Me: "Ikr!, Guess now I'm gonna be called your son."
She was like what? ...
Me: "Yeah not joking, I really do wanna become a boy;This was why I did all this."
GOT 'EEM
That is an AWESOME way to come out! I came out to my mom after I told her that I am bisexual (to test the waters) and I pretty much did it with ugly sobbing.
She wants to support me but I don't think she really understands, because she said "happy new years to my girls!" (I have a sister). Kinda cried there too.
The same but don't work. They don't understand the intention ...
I took me a long time until I knew I was trans (it just clicked somehow at the age of 20 or 21).
I grew up almost genderless because I was allowed to do whatever I desired. I had moments all through my life (like 'I should have been the boy....') but didn't realised.
when it finally clicked I was like ''sh**, I'm trans, I don't want to be trans'' I wished it would go away - it hasn't. And everything made sense now.
So I knew this wouldn't go away and I wanted my mom to be included. So, that one day I kind of told her that I was questioning (even though I already knew). She told me that I had been a girly girl she wouldn't understand...blah blah.... even though she knows a little about transgender... she said, if my sister or my brother had told her she'd believe it 'cause they were acting like the opposite gender when they were young...'
This made me so sad, I never wanted to share my feelings again. Well, that was 4 years ago. It took me a long time to recover and the feeling is still there - it hasn't gone and only got stronger.
A few months ago I started telling people, that I was trans and what happened surprised me. I feel more happy now (even without any transitioning), it's not perfect but with every person I tell it's getting better and better. I somehow accept myself more and more.
My mom still doesn't know and I am still sad that she responded that way. Next time, I tell her that I am trans and not that I question my gender - that hasn't worked for me...
Just found my old comment..
My mom knows now, and a lot of people too (about half I would say). My mom still tries to ignore this fact and doesn't believe this being true but I am sure of myself now and don't let this drag me down.
I am truely sure now I sometimes try to think about stopping the whole coming out process (and all the transitioning stuff) and try to imagine myself as a woman, and that's the point where I know for sure.. can't really describe the feeling I get, but it's a clear one, that I don't want to get back...
And I won't.. (by the way I'm 26 now)
Im SO happy you made this video. This explains alot of things.
Watching this years later but hearing your story, I found it was scarily similar to my own. Thankyou so much for this upload - one of the reasons I have so much doubt is that I didn't know for a really long time, and ive only heard people say they've known for certain since they were little. I found this video incredibly reassuring, so Thankyou and I'm glad things are working out :)
I understand everything you said. That never happens. o-o You just legit gave me hope in transitioning and coming out completely.
Yep, I'm teary too. You are an amazing person. Well spoken, funny, and light… great video for many young people who are questioning.
I like wearing skirts and dressing girly, but there are also times I wish I didn't have boobs and could look like a guy. I guess I'm just an inbetweener.
That's how I feel!
Squid Cat :)
I feel the same way as well
Kaiwaii Yeah.
yay *highfive*.
I am an inbetweener, but a lot more towards the girl side than my biological male gender. I also relate to the term 'bigender'. Seems to fit, for me..
ive proabably watched or read days of material but seriously your video was one of the most honest and helpful things ever
man this is so cool - i love hearing people's stories whose transitions can help add insights into mine. thanks for sharing :)
Damn dude. Not sure if this is polite but it turned out pretty damn good lol
Your advice on how to come out (especially to people who might not know much about being trans/aren't very supportive) - easing your way into actually coming out, explaining the components of how you're feeling before dropping the bomb - that's just amazing advice. Thanks so much for it, and I wish I'd come across this video before coming out to my parents and some less educated friends straightaway. I hope that someone in my position will find your video, and that your advice might help make their coming out a little bit easier. Thank you so much for this video.
You have no idea how much this video is helping me
just
thank you so much man
Omg this is EXACTLY my story! Thank you so much for posting this video. It made me feel like I'm not alone and that I can be happy in my body even though I don't feel content right now. Thank you so much!
I watched this video a long long time ago when I was first questioning myself and it really set me on the path I needed to be to discover and accept myself. Thanks Skye, you've been a big part of my transition so far and I feel a lot happier.
really glad you've put this out there, a really healthy, mature, responsible approach, i hope lots of people watch it!
Your transition is quite successful because I cannot tell that you were once a girl.
This is a really helpful and detailed video. Thank you so much for taking the time and having the courage to voice your journey and reach out to other people who are questioning and confused. Congratulations on your transition.
This helped me so much. You can't imagine how useful this was
I’m also documenting my transition on here and your story is inspiring
I just want to say that your journey from video one, has been the building blocks and spine to my own life quest. You inspire me to seek my families approval by incorporating them in this adventure and thanks to you ive opened up to my family about wanting to begin therapy and I truely didnt have anyone that could have helped me explore myself better. Thankyou so much. I owe you one.
-astro
Great video and sound advice! I love the way you described your process, that you included you family on your journey because that is SO important: to involve other people rather than shock them with a coup d'etat. Massive thumbs up
I know this video was a long while ago but its helped me a lot and helped me get to know myself better. You are such an inspiration. Thank you so much.
I have really enjoyed watching your videos and learning a bit about you. My own journey in life has been very different than yours, but I have to say that you are one of the coolest, most thoughtful and introspective guys I have ever encountered. It's great that RUclips allows you to share your story and I and others can hear it. I wish I'd had a friend like you when I was in my teen years. You are awesome.
This video helped me realize that my case isn't bizarre I guess. Like I'm questioning my gender and I feel like I might be trans but I'm not sure and I don't want to just jump into the label. I thought that since I didn't automatically know, then I couldn't be trans. Because a lot of people know from when they were about 2, but I didn't. I was just a tomboy until I started learning about transgender and the possibility that I could be it.
i think the way you went about telling people about your situation as far as including them is beautiful, and i wish i had gone about it in a similar way. :]
Thank you so much for making this video. I've been struggeling with myself quite a long time about me being an ftm transgender or not. Scared to talk about it with others as well. Most people already knew it on a younger age, but you showed me it's possible for someone to actually have a doubt about being trans and what that kinda feels like. Really good job ! Thank you !
You are SO ATTRACTIVE wow!
-- also you gave some really great advice. Great video!
Omehgawd I remember ages ago I bumped across a video of yours I think when you just started with testerone/hormones? Your voice was different, looks, everything. You gotten only the prettier! Good for you :D!
Think I might start watching your videos now. I like how honest and level minded you are.
I've been watching your videos, and it really helped me. I hope to be as confident as you are, eventually. Thank you very much for your video!
Hey man, just wanted to say what an inspiration you are. I started T a little over a week ago, and have been watching all your transition videos. It gives people such hope to know they have a chance to be who they wanna be and to just see all the changes possible with T and ops. I relate to so many things you said in this vid about realising I was trans about trying to fit in when you're in 7th grade XD Anyway, thanks man. Well done.
You are fantastic.
It's strange and amazing how we are all a part of the same humanity with the same cellular beginnings/makeup, and yet our species is miraculously complicated when looked at on a much smaller spectrum. I love it.
Skylar, this was so helpful to me. I consider myself genderfluid, but I've been having some trouble with my gender identity lately. Thank you so much for taking your time to make this videos!!
This is something that I've been thinking about for an -incredibly- long time, but only recently have I started considering telling/talking to my parents about it, I'm just unsure as to how to ease them into it. Thank you for this video. :) It's helped.
Thank you for posting this video!! Your words have encouraged me!!
I just wanted to drop by and thank you for making this video. I saw it four months ago and it really helped me understand who I am/was trying to deny that I was. This video helped me to come out to my friends and family and begin the process of transitioning. In a few weeks Ill be starting T and it may or may not have happened without this video but still. . .I thank you :)
easily the most helpful video i've seen as of yet. thank you.
You're very sensible, and gave very sensible advice to people who really want to know more so they can make the tough decision. You certainly have my respect. I hope things are going well for you.
I can't thank you enough for making this video. This is basically my exact story, I even started being more androgynous in 9th grade as well.
I'm around the stage where I'm testing male pronouns and such, I hope I can figure myself out soon. And I'm glad you could figure yourself out. Again, thank you so very much.
Man I wish I had seen this video when I was questioning things because I share a lot of feelings that you expressed. I literally didn't know that I could be trans due to all the media diverging from my feelings and ahhh this would have given me so much confidence so much sooner.
Thanks for the video.
Wonderful vid, as always. Thanks for the comprehensive overview of your journey!
You are getting so good looking every time you post a video!
Your past, it sounds like mine. The way I've felt about being me. The last part of your video brought me to tears, I'm just amazed to know that people really go through with this and are willing to post it. I've been thinking about changing but I'm not going to at this time because of my current situation. I saw some of twinfools's videos to then I saw that he recommended seeing this video. I'm just in amazement right now. Thank you for posting this video.
omg you are SO attractive
But beyond that this is really inspirational and amazing and I respect you so much for posting this on the internet.
This is amazing.
Wow! You really are an amazing guy, your truly inspirational. When I took my psychology 101 class it was hard to here some of the challenges that arise in people's life and how genders so much more complex then male or female, how humans are so complex. And you embraced your gender good for you! And don't ever let anyone tell you other wise.
God Bless, you are really amazing
Thank you for making this video. I can really relate to you and how you explored it first before jumping into it, just to understand it better and be sure. Right now I'm doing a lot of research.
@alaninnh thanks alan! and testosterone stopped my period after my very first shot. never saw it again, thank goodness. for some guys, depending on the T dose they are on or if they are using androgel, and if they have high estrogen to start, can still get their period on t for anywhere from what i've heard can be 6-12 months..
Thank you for this thoughtful, smart, truly helpful video! You are an amazing person!
I can't imagine how hard it must have been. I mean being a teenager sucks as it is without any added issues! I just wanted to let ya know that I really admire you for your bravery and your mindset and I'm happy that you seem to be doing so well. I hope that continues!
Thank you for making this video! Your advice is brilliant, and I definitely think starting with my mum and saying 'I don't feel right' and kind of bring it is as a 'gently, gently' way. That way it doesn't just be like BOOM! Here is all the stuff, deal with it. It just starts with a little bit... So, THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :)
I just watched your first video and then this one to compare your voice...
Wow, what a change!
You're amazing!
I hope I sound as manly when I get to two years!
You make a lot of great points to where I almost feel bad for starting my transition the way that I did lol I found out about transitioning 3 years ago, but didn't further more research until a year or so before coming out. I haven't seen a therapist but now I'm looking into doing that just because it feels like the right thing. I've taken a "I'll handle it as it comes" approach only because I knew no other way. Things are progressing so I'm thankful I didn't mess things up too badly lol
I can totally relate to you sky! Thanks for making this
I just recently started to kind of figure things out, and this is almost exactly what I've felt. I thought I had to be a female, that I was stuck, and it's nice to know I'm not alone in that feeling. And just like you did, I'm making sure to go to therapy first to figure everything out. This was so helpful, thank you for sharing your story!
I really appreciated this video. I'm working on figuring out my gender on my own and in therapy and watching people discuss their own journeys is really reassuring and validating. Thanks!
This was a really helpful video. Thanks for doing it!
You look a little like Evan Peters :3
Hey I been watching your vids since you first started and I just wanted to say thanks. Your vlogs really helped me. And I see that they have helped others too. Just thanks man!
Wow, thanks! This is actually really helpful!
thank you so much for making this video, this really helps me, hopefully i can ease this into my dad so that he knows what i'm talking about
LOVE THIS! Looking good :)
You're adorable:3 I'm proud of youuuu(: nice job with this video!!!(:
I needed this - thank you
I just came out to most of my class over chat, in a high right now. All good reactions over the chat and I'm seeing them later tonight. No one is questioning my choices the only question asked is if I want to go by my preferred name yet in collage, I said yeah.
This video has helped me so much. Thank you :)
You literally just told my life story.
Wow... When I read your comment, it just... clicked, in my brain. Maybe it was always at the back of my mind, and I just needed it put it into words, but - you're right. After years of wondering, it's so... strange - that the answer would come to me so suddenly, and feel exactly right. I don't know how I didn't realize it myself, but... thank you. I doubt I'm expressing myself as well as I'd like but... Jeez... Thank you for answering a question I've had about myself for a long time.
thumbs up for the most inspiring sky video ever. thanks man, this really, really helps :)
you are a fantastic bank of wisdom, sir. it's pretty awesome to know i'm not alone in anything.
Amazing. Thank you for this. You are so well spoken and very helpful.
I love your videos'! watching this video and the rest of them, answers alot of questions for not only me but for others who are questioning. I enjoy watching your video's please keep them coming!
Thank you so much for making this video. It's amazing to find somebody that's gone through what I am presently facing. I just wish it wasn't so vital to discuss it with my parents. XD I'm 18 and only just realised that I could be trans at the start of this year. The 'knowing in your heart' thing is exactly how it is. I realise now that it's going to take a while to figure myself out and be who I am inside but at least I'm not so scared after seeing this. Thank you.
I live with my mum, am a year or so from 40 and a young girl. Ive been talking with my mom the last couple days about this possibility. Untill my dad died 10 years ago( he was a southern baptist black man from mid 40's, and became a mail-order minister shortly before he died. Im also pagan/agnostic atheist now, and he had issues with me being a witch as a yound adult and teen), i didnt even try to be bi. Now im affirmed pan and now im gender curious. Pretty much how you described yourself..... lets say, of most of the vids I've seen, i feel most connected with your story, except the age diff.... being born in the 80's, my gen (gen-x) started opening up about this kind of thing, but with a lot of angst, confusion and anarchistic tendancies to fight against the older generations and the labels they force(d) on us. Just be thankful we as a society have come pretty far in the last almost 40 years. Its a popular topic instead of swept under the rug and ignored as freaks of nature and nothing more...
I now know that bipolar isnt the only thing i need to see if i need therapy for. I've been seriously thinking about transitioning because being ok with male is better than being nihilistic and suicidal as a female with a beard..... ive neverfelt fully either, so i could be gender fluid, but i def need an unbiased opinion on most of the things in my head now...
I rambled into tmi territory way too much, but at least u know I'm sincere and not some creeper. Lol
Cheers!✌
So, I can't say your journey is just like mine, as mine would be a MtF one, and I am just at the beginning, really. But hearing about what you had to go through, and how brave you are, and how you figured everything out by experimentation, gives me hope. Yeah, I see this video is from last year, but it really spoke to me. I have yet to come out to my parents, or even discuss it with them. I'm not looking forward to it. Anyway, thank you for this.
-Khary
Thank you for your message Skylar
I just want to thank you. I've been struggling with this for the longest time, not knowing what to do about my gender confusion. I really want to go on my own journey, and you've shown me how. I'm NOWHERE near ready lol, but now i think i know where to start when i am, thanks to your video. Thankyouthankyouthankyoooou, I know where to start!
Thanks sky you helped me a lot with this video. I must say when you were talking about like your past and school life and such, i had quite similar experiences, i'm actually thinking about transitioning but i want to be 100% sure and i'll take your advice about the therapy and such. Thankyou again. :]
Definitely considering your advice. Thanks.
Really amazing. I obviously can't say that i can relate to what you've been through, i'm not a Transgender, but i was moved all the same :) It's very noble of you to make these videos for people struggling with gender identity so they don't feel alone
this video actually helped alot. it made me think more about it. like i've always been a "tomboy" and wearing the baggy clothes, I've been a "lesbian" for most of my life. I've always like being one of the boys. about a year ago i cut my hair short and at first i didn't know how i felt about it then after having it for a while it starting feeling more like me
Thank you for your video. I can tell you have done some great work in therapy. You are very self-actualized. Your physical appearance is quite natural and attractive. I am happy for you. God Bless.
I'm speechless.
this is amazing.
and by the way your videos are just fantastic and I'm proud of you already got so fast in your transition, keep going ;)
and I hope I didn't made too many mistakes in my comments but I'm german and english is a foreign language for me...and by the way not as easy as most people assume :P
This video made me smile for the first time in weeks. I'm in 6th grade and this really helped me. Thank you for making this.
I know this is old, but I relate to so much of this story. Stuff like this is so helpful.
I have a similar story too but I can't and couldn't talk to my parents about feeling wrong in my body because I know that I can't trust them. This may sound stupid but they never really accepted that I have my own life and opinion as well and all they ever do is laughing about what I say, they even ignored my depression of 3 years though I know they knew. But thank you for all these tips, I'll try and work harder in the future, you're an amazing person.