Becoming Reliant on Antipsychotics

[@BoostBl1P]

So many crazy things have led up to the point where I had to start taking meds. I try to remind myself of that when I start doubting my need for them.
At the end of the day, other people don’t share your exact chemistry or past experiences, so for them to assume what’s right concerning meds sounds bizarre and dangerous.

[@BipolarGossamer]

Yeah, I kind of dismissed those comments that were informing me these meds "ruin my brain" because I just don't know how to respond to that.

[@jdbookshelf]

I can relate to being wary of medications and wishing for a taste of the full human emotional experience. I'm on 5 bipolar medications and feel "flat" most of the time and definitely have affected memory. Not taking medications is like a deal with the devil though. Over the years I've just become "fine" with the medications, like I am "fine" with most everything because of the meds themselves.

[@BipolarGossamer]

That's a good way to describe it. Luckily I'm only on one medication, but I can still feel the emotional flatness. I can't imagine being on 5 at once 😰

[@SmilingBeaver-ou7nc]

I can relate. I'm on four meds, and I have to push myself to get out out of bed , and be productive.

[@RobHTech]

I feel you. I have forgotten to take my meds, and it wasn't good. My brain does feel dependent on them. Even leading up to the next dose I can sometimes not feel good, stressed, and at best just take them late, and at worst I either crashed or energy boosted to the sky. I have, several times, taken too much meds because I forgot if I took it or not, and after falling off a cliff when I skipped them last time, I prefer to take an extra one. But, my nighttime dose is so high that I can't/shouldn't do that. I just flat forget. I write it down sometimes. I took 2 bedtime doses once by mistake and I slept for about 36 hours.
I don't know anyone who actually has Bipolar who doesn't need some kind of meds bc bipolar is a neurobiolgoical change in the brain; i.e., therapy alone does NOT work. The meds blunt the high dopamine but also blunt the emotional response and can affect memory.

[@BipolarGossamer]

That sounds really rough both ways 😞 Maybe if you had like a pill container for the week, it will help keep track of whether you already took it for the day or not.

[@tangocash40]

It is ok to be worried about the long term side effects of these medications but trust me, it is best to stay on your prescribed medication. When I was in my late teens to early twenties, I was hospitalized several times within a three year period. I took medications but they were treating depression, not bipolar 1. Eventually when my doctors figured out my actual disorder, I functioned far better and was able to live a stable life with the appropriate medication. Being hospitalized is hell. You do not want to risk that, trust me. By the way, my current medication is lamotrigine. If your current medication does not work out, maybe that is worth a mention to your prescriber.

[@BipolarGossamer]

Thanks for the tips! I'm sorry that happened to you, and I'm glad they finally figured it out. I have actually tried lamotrigine before, and it didn't really seem to be very effective for me. Anyway, thanks for the comment, and I hope you are well!

[@user-wx6gc1ng2g]

Actually missing a dose won't do anything because the meds stays in your system

[@BipolarGossamer]

You're right about that! The half-life of Abilify is 72-96 hours. I wonder why I felt so bad