Being A Stay At Home Mom
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- Опубликовано: 6 июл 2014
- Let's not make this about what makeup I'm wearing (or not wearing). I do have Zoya America on my nails, though. :)
I'd love for this to be a conversation starter-so let me know what topics you'd like for me to discuss more in-depth!
National organizations/mom things to do:
Moms Club www.momsclub.org
Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS) www.mops.org
Junior League (yes, I was in Jr. League) www.ajli.org
PTA www.pta.org
The Little Gym www.thelittlegym.com
YMCA (A wonderful resource & place to go) www.ymca.net
Where else to find me:
Email: msgoldgirl@gmail.com
My blog: www.msgoldgirl.com
Twitter: / goldgirl330
Instagram: / msgoldgirl
Camera used: Sony HDR-CX110
Movie editing software: iMovie '11
*Occasionally, I get sent a product for free to review, which is done at the company's own peril. Sometimes I like their product, but sometimes I will give it a big thumbs down. Sometimes I use affiliate links, which will be clearly marked. I make a small pittance of a commission when you use said links to purchase the item in question. While I enjoy making RUclips videos and interacting with the viewers, to justify the insane amount of hours I spend planning, filming, editing, uploading, researching, answering comments on YT, answering comments on FB, responding to tweets and emails, I need to make a small bit of money. Otherwise, I'm not someone with a part-time job, I'm an obsessive compulsive beauty/computer freak who has become a bit of a shut-in. 
Хобби
I really enjoyed this video! I have a college degree, worked until children came, and then stayed at home with the kids while my husband worked a full time job and went to school for his masters degree. I also was a "professional" volunteer. Loved every minute. My children are now 21 and 22 (both college students) and they need me in their lives just as much now as before! My husband always says that "he makes the living, and I make the living worthwhile"!
That's a great saying!
From a guys point of view I feel stay at mums are not appreciated enough , I think it's very difficult to place a value on how important this role is , children thrive in a solid family structure which I think stays at home mum provide among many other benefits this brings to the family unit , I also feel it important to have a meal every day with the whole family so every one can talk about the days adventures . Well done for sharing you experience .
Thank you-I've always wondered what other men thought of stay-at-home mothers. I know how my husband feels, but that's really it.
Marnie Goldberg you are doing a great job
Marnie Goldberg you are amazing, coming from a man, you stay at home moms have the hardest job of all :') it brings joy to hear how strong you are to raise kids!
Just a “meal” u think that’s the only good thing about stay at home mothers? Wow. I think they cook 3 meals a day for the children clean , wash clothes and clean the home and nowadays also drive the kids to school the doctor the cinema and every other activity as well as shop for the home for groceries clothing and home goods and anything else
Marnie, you don't need to apologize for being lucky enough to stay home with your children. You obviously appreciate what you have and smart enough to know that a stay-at-home parent is the BEST thing in the world you can do for them! Awesome job, keep it up!!
Thank you!
My mom was in the PTA when I was in elementary school, every Wednesday she spent all day at the school helping the teachers. I got to eat lunch with her on those days and I can't describe how special those lunches were, even though I saw her everyday, there was just something about getting to see her in the middle of those long school days that just made me so happy. She also chaperoned on a lot of the field trips, so we got to experience things together in that way also.
That's a huge reason why I was so involved in the kids' schools. They always told me they felt special seeing me working with the teachers, and I personally enjoyed seeing them in a different environment.
MsGoldgirl Yes! Mine too. Don't they make you feel like a rockstar when they say things like that? :)
Toriology Yes!!!
Marnie Goldberg | MsGoldgirl Marnie, after raising 3 children, I can tell you that the teen years were the hardest for me. I found out real quick, that staying close to them through these years, goes a long way in keeping them from being led astray. I mean, who wants to lead your teen away if mom has to come too? When one of my daughters started to go down a dark road, I went to school with her and followed her to all her classes. And told my other two, that I would do the same for them, If I had too. And because I had to quit my job to tag along with them, we had to start shopping second hand stuff if they wanted the cool name brand stuff.(a lesson in consequences for your actions) And said daughter, had to skip a year of cheerleading until she got her head on straight. My other daughter sent me a note once after she had married that said. "I spent most of my life trying to get you and daddy off my back, to grow up and realize that ya'll were the only ones that had my back." The teen years are hard on everyone. Though I wouldn't have wanted to skip my teen years or theirs. I would not want to repeat them either. You are doing a great job Marnie,
If a Mother can and wants to stay at home I believe it is the very best option for the children.
I'm a SAHM to a 1 yr old and your video makes me feel less guilty about being home with him when he gets of school age. My husband has always supported my choice and of course enjoys coming home to a clean house and dinner cooked! I'm not sure why society has formed this image of women that we HAVE to work outside the home and if we don't we are lazy! I do so much during the day that i wish there were more hours! I love being a SAHM, It truly is the most rewarding job!
I'm a 24 year old stay at home mom with 6 year old girl , 4 year old girl and a 3 year old boy. I appreciate this video very much thank you
Good morning Marnie. I too, was fortunate to stay home with my children (they are now 39 and 36). It was the hardest, yet most rewarding time in my life. I wouldn't trade that time for anything. I felt I kept current and relevant by having a great curiosity for many things, ideas, philosophy etc. There weren't too many stay at home moms then. Even then, people would question "why don't you work" and I would respond, "I work very hard each day, I just don't receive a monetary paycheck." Fast forward...I a wonderful son and daughter who both have two well adjusted sons. Life is so great at 60. I look forward to each and every day. Thank you for sharing your life with us..........MaryEllen
Thank you for giving me a peek at what's to come!!
I actually love being 60!! The "hard" stuff is over, and each new day is a gift. Being the best I can be at any age, has always been my goal. You are going great......MaryEllen
MaryEllen After 60 you just gave me so much inspiration. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. I'm a stay-at-home mom and I'm struggling but the struggle will be worth it when I'm in your shoes looking back on these days. ❤
I was a "working" mom for the first 6 years of my daughters life and the first 2 years of my sons. I am now a stay at home mom and feel like is truly the place I am meant to be. I know it's not for everyone (and I respect that), but it's what works for our family. My son has struggled with hearing problems since birth and has required treatments and therapy. I KNOW I wouldn't of been able to do as much for him if I was working outside of the home. I do sell things on Ebay and make RUclips videos both as a way to make a little income and as a way to "decompress", but I wouldn't have things any other way. It's like you said, it's a personal preference and one that shouldn't be judged.
You are spot on! I've been home since 1998 and it's a decision both my hubs and I would never want to change. Yes we are blessed to be able to do it. Thanks for your video!
Great video! I remember when i was little some of my favourite days were the ones when i was sick because my mom would not go to work. I enjoyed that time with her. Of course our family couldnt afford her staying at home. So, its nice for kids to grow knowing that their mom is always available, if u can afford that. Im also a stay-at-home mom and i would say that another big plus for me is that im constantly moving doing something and staying fit. Good luck with everything! Xxx vic
Marnie, This video was wonderful! My children are now in college and most of their years while in school I was a Stay-at-home-mom and I completely agree with everything that you shared. Getting involved in various community women's groups as well as the PTO, homeroom mom, cheerleading coach and etc. was so important. Being involved in a community women's group gave me my own identity, plus being involved in the schools allowed me to get to know the kids and the parents of whom my children were friends with. Getting involved is so important for yourself as well as your children!
Hugs!
Karen
21 years of being a stay-at-home mom! With the exception of a few years I worked while going through my divorce.. My now fiancé understood the important of me being home, especially when we moved in together, so I could build our family, inside-out! The years of judgement and snarky comments because I was at home "doing nothing to contribute" definitely entertained me...lol! It's the hardest job around! I'm happy to say, I've raised the most 3 amazing, smart, caring, open-minded humans I know, and everyone else knows! I've sacrificed A LOT over the years, just to be home with my family... I'm also very "1950's" minded, and wish more were like us... Just because I'm home, doesn't mean my fiancé disrespects me or thinks less of me...I know he admires me and what I do, and how I get it all done, everyday damn day! Now I have one daughter home, I've decided to go back to school and get my education! Something I never did and always wanted! I'm nervous, but excited! Thanks for this video.
Loved this, Marnie! My husband was also an Air Force officer and I taught. Listening to you was refreshing bc we share similar values in our marriages; I've been staying at home for the last 6yrs and while it's challenging, it is the best decision for our family too. I've taken a slightly different approach to reaching out so you've inspired me to make a video!!!!!!!! Thanks, girl!!!!
Thanks for this video, I love being a stay at home mom. I'm very excited as this year, my baby starts Kindergarten at our elementary school, where my 13 and 15 year old went, and ive really missed doing things at that school. As my older ones could care less that mom is at their school, but I love seeing little ones face light up when they see mom.
I want to home school my children at the young age and when there get a little older like 7 years old I will let them go to preschool but I want to spend time with them they grow up so fast should I bring my children to preschool for 2 times a week or 3 times a week like Monday and Tuesday and Thursday or Monday and Thursday so I have time to spend with them please give me tips and advice
thank you for sharing your experiences. it helps me alot as a stay at home mom with like zero friends (that's my fault) but still has an active life outside of home. My daughter is 15 months now and I'm officially that stay at home mom. I can't wait to explore new things eventually.
Great video! I stayed home and raised my 4 kids~ the youngest just went off to college. I will never regret spending that time with my kids~ it goes so fast.
Marnie, I'm so glad you shared this video. I left the classroom 2 years ago when my son was born so I know that parents like you can dramatically change a school for the better. I also volunteer with at risk children and find it to be one of the most rewarding parts of my week...other than being with my son of course. Thank you so much for your advice.
As someone who is beginning the discussion of having a family, I really appreciate hearing your perspective on staying at home. Thanks for making this video!
I was a stay at home mom for 13 years and now work outside the home part time while the kids are in school. I agree with all of your thoughts in this video. Volunteering has always been and continues to be an awesome way to feel like you are sharing your time and talents with more than your family. I appreciate your comment about getting help with some of the household duties. I had never thought of it that way. I never did seek outside help due to financial constraints, but what a valid point. Working in a traditional job site, there are several people running the show! Thanks again for sharing.
IAM a stay at home mom of 6,4,2 year olds. At times it's soo hard to stay home but I absolutely love it and wouldn't change it. I love being home and being able to see the kids first (crawl, walk, etc). Im so greatful that I can stay home with my kids so "someone" else isn't rising them. I'm so glad you put this video it. It really helps!
Wow ms gold girl. I don't know how you do it all! Honestly I'm 26 (recently engaged) and I really look up to you. You hold so many leadership positions in your community while raising a huge family (pets are kids too!) and look DAMN good doing it! Props to you!
Thank you-but there are tons of women doing the same if not more than me. You can do it too!
I have to say I love the way you went about this video. I am someone who is usually pissy about housewives that don't work. I myself work full time and have the added 2nd full time job of "housewife". But after listening to you, I think my opinion was always based off my own mother who was a SAHM that was lazy and unhappy, never cooked, never cleaned, was never involved. And to me that was what I always based SAHM on. I really love your advice as treating it like a job. And that you have always been involved with your children as well as your community. In my opinion, you did it right!! And you should be proud of that. I respect everything you said. Thank you for this video.
Thank you-I'm glad this helped you see it from another perspective.
BunnyXO a stay at home mother is meant to take her job as a position like a profsssion u get up look after ur kids make sure they are clean fed bathed healthy happy and have a clean home and fresh meals 3 x a day I’m a mother but not a lazy one I’m very hard working all hours of the day everyday 24 hours a day and that’s what it means to be to be a mum
I also stayed home and am raising my 4 children ages 19,17,16,14. I am college educated (RN) just like you and married at 32 when having my kids me and husband decided that when having kids that was best for us. i grew up as a only child and had 2 working parents that despite having all the wonderful material things we had, i had no parents except to do the basic things in my life, spent it alone the majority of time when not in school. I knew early on I would never be that kind of parent, that couldn't attend all my extra curricular activities and even my daily needs because of work related restraints (I had a nanny/caregiver) in place of a stay at home mom. This in my case marked my life, I realize not all people have any longterm effects from this. My husband and I truly enjoy the fact that I am able to care for my kids and provide them with at least one parent to be home when they leave and come home from school as well other things that a SAHM can offer. We do not drive fancy cars, and go without certain things, but thats ok for us.
My hubby and I don't have any kids yet, but my mom stayed at home with me as an only child and I am eternally grateful. More power to you woman! And thanks for all the advice I may get to use in the future.
Hi Marnie,
I've been watching your videos for almost a year now but I've never left a comment. I absolutely loved this video. Thank you for having the courage to be so open and honest about your life experiences. I especially liked the part where you mentioned your husband was in the military. My husband is a supply officer in the Navy and I also try to get as involved as possible in the spouses group. However, I have definitely been slacking in the volunteering department and your video really inspired me to do more! If you filmed this with the intention of just touching one person's life, know that you truly have. Thank you so much, Marina
I think if I be a stay at home mom I will want to work at home like a at home day care or a bakery at home mabe a office in my home please give me tips and advice
Marnie, brava. I've been a huge fan of yours for going on almost 3 years now. I just love how you have your shit together, how your outlook on things is so realistic. I'm almost tearing up with relief from this video. I'm almost done with my first trimester with our first child. I'm so excited to say the least but also soooo very nervous for the future. I will be working part time instead of full time and this made me feel so much better about things. Thanks for keeping it real (as you always do).
I have been watching you for about a year and this has been one of my favorite videos you've done! As a stay at home mom I can really relate to what you're saying! I love that you point out that we never get a vacation! I say that to my husband whenever we travel. Thank you for this! :)
So glad I stumbled upon this video. So helpful! I just became a stay at home mom in March. I've been trying to get a system/routine going but it's so hard. But you def gave me some insight, different perspective on being a stay at home mom and I'm going to look into the websites you added. Thanks so much!
You did a great job on the video. I am a fixture in my sons school and volunteer as much as humanly possible. Feels good to the soul. xoxo
I think you're a very admirable mother. I think it's great that you know what makes you happy because a happy mom makes happy kids! My parents both worked full time and my grandma was like a stay at home mom for me. I think it's wonderful if someone can give all of that attention and support to the children without relying on daycare and less personal means of child care. Great video!
That is a great video. My baby is two month old and I never before thought about being a home stay mom, until now after his birth. Thank you for sharing your story. For me you are very inspiring. You seem a very happy person and I enjoy your videos.
This was perfect timing! I just brought home my newborn adopted daughter a week ago and am going to be staying home. I have been nervous because I have worked since I am 12, but really wanted to stay home since my mom was a single mom working crazy hours and want to give my daughter a different life if I'm able to. This info made me feel a little relief that I'll be plenty busy while benefitting my child even further! I make RUclips videos on the side for fun but those friends are on a screen ;) I have friends in the area but all but one work full time! Excited for this journey, thanks for this video, it was great!
Congratulations on your new baby! How exciting for you!!
Thank you for this video. I am a mother of three young daughters and have worked full-time (and then some) for the past 6 years of being a mother. I am quickly approaching the stay-at-home/work-at-home status and I am so scared. Scared of losing my identity - my skillset - my connections.... your words spoke to me. Thank you for sharing - I found it very reassuring!
Wonderful video! I love your views on volunteering. Thanks for sharing your prospective and tips.
Spot on, Marnie, every word. I've been doing this for 16 years as well and I could have made this video. We have always felt that my husband worked so much, we needed for me to be fully there for the family. And we've taken the financial consequences for it, but it has for sure been the right thing for us. Great job!
Thank you for making this video and for being so open and honest! DH and I are moving our family from Chicago to Texas in Feb 2015 and I too will become a proud stay at home mommy to our 3 children! I'm nervous about so much as you can imagine. I was born/raised in Chicago and will miss my family/friends. Many changes to come, but I'm staying positive and looking forward to our adventure. Please continue to share!
What part of Texas? San Antonio by any chance?
MsGoldgirl The Houston area! Perhaps you'll have a meet/greet...I'll surely take the drive to chat with you in person! Thanks for taking the time to respond to me.
Thank you for this very enlightening video. I really needed this today. I am a wife and stay at home mom. One of my children has been diagnosed with autism. He is 12 years old. Some days are harder than others today was one of them
Your advice is so helpful!! I've just recently become at stay-at-home mom and it's been hard for me adjusting to being in charge of everything that involves the home and our children. It's definitely is a full time job! Thanks for wonderful tips on how to make the most of it! :)
hi marnie. I too was a stay at home mum from the age of 17 until I was 50, in that time I was blessed to have 5 sons and 1 daughter. I loved my time at home and although I got some comments on it on the whole most people were quite envious I could be at home. I chose to do without a lot of stuff my working friends had but really looking back it was only the odd girls spa break or a shopping trip to London. I've been working 6 years and love it but I know I made the best choice for me and my family and I've no regrets. Feel very proud Marnie your boys will be away before you know it. x
Thank you for this video. It was wonderfully done and in good taste. Being a military wife and stay at home mom, it's difficult to make friends after a move. Thank you for the advice!
Hi Marnie,you are so right about being Mom,it's 24/7 never ends specially when family vocation comes ,the rest on vocation but not the mom!but this is not the end of the road,when they get older they do appreciate the time with you more!
I tried volunteering last year in my kids school. It was ok. The reason, I stopped, was because going there costs extra in gas. It might sound like nothing for some people, but we just can't afford any extra money going anywhere if we can help it. I walked a few times, also walked to pick up my kids from school, but the weather is not always nice for that. Instead, I focus my time and energy on things that save us money. I raise chickens for eggs and meat, garden, do all the housework including cutting grass and pool care. I also started youtube to share my tips and tricks on saving money.
+My frugal life If you can, it's always great to try to help out in your kids' class, because it teaches your kids that school is important. I always had working moms that couldn't be in the classroom ask for stuff to do at home. I could send home stuff for them to work on for the classroom with their child and they'd send it back in their child's backpack. Maybe you could try that-but it sounds like you're really busy!!
I guess, I am too busy, because the fact that my kids get homework from school, that requires a parent to help them, like reading 15 minutes a day, or read the directions for the kindergartner, because otherwise they won't know what to do, because they can't read yet, just irritates me, because they can do all that in school, if they don't waste so much time, or they should only give homework that a kid can do by herself. The older kids can do it just fine, but my older kids often say they would rather skip the recess in the hot sun, and finish their homework at school to save time. When I was volunteering there, I have seen a lot that, when the bell rings, kids will line up in front of the classroom door, and then wait for the teacher, that is getting her coffee and socializing with others. What a waste of time and the poor kids get frustrated.
As a former reading specialist, I can't disagree with you more. It is extremely important to read with your child (or have them read to you) every night as they're mastering reading skills. Homework is important for all kids to get extra skills practice on what they learned during the day. Recess is just as important as classroom work-the kids need to be outside, exercise and learn how to socialize with their peers. And you can do the work for the teacher during the day while the kids are away if you really wanted to do it. It just sounds like you are really busy doing other things too.
I loved this. I'm going to send this link to my STAHM friends that are struggling with it right now. I'm not a mom. I'm an Army wife which means that sometimes I have a job and sometimes I don't (depends on where we're stationed). Six years ago my husband and I made the decision that I would be a professional volunteer and a SAHW. I truly love it. I find that it works beautifully for us for this stage of our lives. Women are so tough on each other for the choices they make regarding their families, marriage, etc. I'm so glad you posted this video. :)
Great video! I really do both....my husband and I have our own business that I do the bookkeeping for. I'm at home when I need to be and at work when my son is at school. Love it! Sort of like you...you work when they are at school and not around. Blessed to be able to be with these kiddos!!
A great video, lots of useful advice, I'm a stay at home mum and I found it difficult till I looked at different ways I kept in touch with the outside world, sometimes it's good to get away from the home for a few hours to keep from getting cabin fever. Love n hugs.xxx
I'm glad you posted this video, I know women/men have absolutely zero understanding what life is like after you have a child and how much is changes things. I'm glad you have your situation; I struggle because both myself and spouse work full time. Then you come home and work (no outsiders assist). There is no such thing as "Me Time", and when I do take a day off (work) I'm either physically sick or my child is sick, that's it. I'm finding it extremely difficult now because my daughter has some physical problems and I've been physically ill since my child was born (I know you have hypothyroidism-which i have & i've seen 2 doctors and they haven't been able to control it-so you know what i'm going thru) then I pick every cold/flu my daughter gets. I keep hearing parents say "just hold on...it gets easier" and I literally can't think about what I'm doing the day after next because I never know what's going to happen, it's rough.
Marnie, this video sounded more like being a volunteer, I would have like to hear more about stayng at home and why. I was a stay at home mom because I felt that was my job. I volunteered almost everyday at the school to be with the kids and have never felt truly appreciated for that. I would like to hear more about what it was like for you to be the one at HOME with the kids, just my opinion. Don't get me wrong I think volunteering is wonderful and a great way to meet people but not the title to this video. Sorry.
I couldn't have volunteered the way I did if I was working full-time outside the home. This video was specifically on how to make friends and not go insane while being a stay at home mom (that was the title), and I think this video addressed those areas well. I can definitely do a follow up on how I filled my days before the kids were in preschool, if that's something you're interested in. But volunteering has always been a huge part of my day.
Hey Marnie, great video. I found it while searching anxiety and depression for stay at home moms and although you didn't touch on it specifically it was helpful to have the reminder that this hard stage with an infant and a toddler and a busy husband will not last forever. It's been 5+ months that I haven't slept through the night and getting up to get ready in the morning seems impossible but I know I feel better when I do. Thank you for the good reminders.
+Sadie Geiger There's a great saying-this too shall pass! Also, at 5 months your baby is definitely capable of sleeping through the night. Try looking at a book called Baby Wise- we applied those techniques with both kids and we never had any sleep issues with either of them.
This is the video that first introduced me to you when I saw it a few months ago. I have recently made the decision to stay at home with my kids (11, 14 & 15). I just have a few clients I need to finish up with and then I am done! I was lucky enough to have control of my schedule so I have been the room parent many times, been in the PTA, helped with the annual Hoedown and also served on the HOA committee in which I also put together several social events for the community. I have not been as involved in the last 18 months or so and I am really looking forward to getting back to giving back and getting my kids more involved. Thank you so much for making this video.
almost 2 years later and I still love this video! One of your best, as far as I am concerned, Marnie.
Enjoyed this Marnie. I've always been a working mum but have always volunteered as well. It's a great way to meet people in your local community and to get to know the Parents of your children's friends.
Thanks so much for responding! I battle back and forth with quiet time, as I feel guilty but it makes sense. My daughter is not able to take naps because she would be up until 2 am, and I can't handle that! However in the early evenings she is terribly bad and it's because she's tired. I like and love all your ideas. Thanks so much!
hi marine I'm a stay at home mum of 3, 11 year old, 3 year old and a 1 and a half year old, great tips, l don't always get to have that time on my own because l don't leave my kids with anyone but my mum and l don't like to pressure her, l just wanted to ask did you find you lost contact with old friends when you decided to become a stay at home mum?
I did, yes, but part of that was because we moved across the country so that didn't help. I also ended up making a lot of new ones through mommy and me groups and other kid-centered social situations. It's really important to get some adult only time-try to find an adult you're comfortable leaving your kids with, even if it's only for an hour or two while you take a walk or get a coffee.
+Marnie Goldberg yes l'll defo gave it a try thanks
I seriously struggle with awful anxiety and have a very disabled 8 year old that has required over 40 surgeries thus far but I have always wanted to volunteer. I tried the PTG for a while but it was kind of catty and my anxiety was just so bad. ButI like that you talk about the importance of volunteering. I hope my sons issues calm down as well as my anxiety so I can do more of it. I have three kids and two step kids full time and they range from 4-12 so my hands are quite full. I think it rings true though that you spoke so much about having time for yourself, out of the house because that's where moms go nuts, literally. Although my sons disability has tied me down it has also forced me into many blessing as his condition is so rare I meet some amazing people through support groups. Thanks for this video Marnie. I can relate with you so so much!
I am in a similar situation xx
Thankyou so much for sharing and making me feel like I'm not alone. I am a 36 year old first time mum to my gorgeous 20 month old son. Huge transition for me to say the least. You have given me some wonderful ideas and a lot of support in this video, thankyou :)
I LOVE this. I am a stay at home mom and have been for 11 years. I could not agree with you more about the volunteering. It helps so much for developing a spencer se of worth outside your family. Nice work with the video. You did it well.
Hi marine I'm a sahm and I totally agree and thanks for sharing.
Thanks so much for this video, Marnie! I just had my first child at 33 years old and I've been working in some form since I was 14, so I never in a million years would have imagined myself as a SAHM, but now that I am a mommy I feel like staying home may be the best choice for my family. I do have some reservations about it, but after watching your video I feel that it is doable. Your point about also having bad days in an office job is an excellent one.
I'm a sahm I have a 4 yr old boy and a 4 month old baby girl I really love it! I need advice on how to manage everyday errands with 2 kids I'm trying to get the hang of it how would u do ur grocery shopping with the kids? I hesitate to go cause of my baby crying so I wait until my husband gets home but it's really late by then any tips would be helpful thanks!
Best advice my MIL gave me: when they're old enough to gum a bagel, get one for them as soon as you get in the grocery store. It will keep them busy the whole time you're shopping! I was also lucky-my husband likes to go grocery shopping with me and we used to go as a family on Friday nights when the kids were little. He was crazy! If you have to go during the week, go right after nap time. Babies cry-it's OK! The more you take them out, the easier it will be to learn how to behave in public.
Loved this! Totally not preachy at all! I think these tips are helpful for all moms, working from home or out of the home. Definitely going to try to be involved in a group when my son starts preschool this fall. Thanks for doing this!
I love your bogs or vlogs, its amazing to me that here I am sitting at home in Ireland listening and watching a lady from America talking about exactly the same issues, concerns and idea's. Your advice is very straight forward, practical and all very positive which I love. Long story short, I stay at home and my husband works, when he comes home ALL TECHNOLOGY is switched off and not turned back on until 9pm!!! My husband is a wonderful man but he can get distracted, so I am here to help, guidance if you will ha ha. Thank you for your boggy things, I love other peoples perspective
This was a well done video, and it didn't seem judgmental to me at all. You've done a great job finding a balance between meeting your family's needs and your own needs. I am a SAHM with a 13 year old daughter whom I homeschool. I find myself at times feeling lonely, and have decided to look more into volunteering, and involving my daughter too. Thanks for sharing!
I love this, thank you so much for this video! I'm a stay at home mother of two small children (3 yrs and 8 mths) and I'm still figuring things out.....!!! It's difficult to feel valued in this role and some days I feel like I'm losing my way!! But your video is so inspiring - for now and for the future as my children grow (go to school etc) thank you so much! Today will be day one of my "job", I'm going to start with a list ;)
My stay-at-home experience is so similar to yours :) most of my closest friends I met in the MOMS Club! I have a 7th grader and a 1st grader and I love volunteering at their schools. I totally agree that being a SAHM is a job. I think so many people forget that we CHOOSE to stay home. I could be a working mom if I wanted to ;) I can't imagine missing out on raising my own kids. They grow up too fast as it is. Thank you for sharing your experience. I think you rock :)
Hi! Marnie you look great! I'm a stay @ home mom. I love it, but I fine my self in a situation I have 3 little ones and one is starting school this yr what would you recommend for PTA when I have the other 2 @ home? My oldest is 12 and I make sure to stay on top of things in school but no more PTA because of the 3 little ones and I don't use a sitter because I'm a stay home mom.
For PTA, there are activities in the evenings where they need help, or things you can do from home that they need help with. You can certainly bring your children to the general meetings, and many schools allow them at Board meetings too. I'd contact the president and let them know about your situation. I'm sure they won't turn away help!
This was a great video! My husband and I are going to start a family soon and we spoke about me being a SAHM, which I am excited about but at the same time nervous, I never gave it thought about how to make friends or to have alone time once a week. This entire video was great advice for my future self. Thank You.
I respect both choices and I think families need to do what they think is best for their family. I think there is so much judgment among moms - you are right, dads don't have these conversations. They are lucky! I am a mom of 3 and work out of the home part time and take care of the house - inside and out when I'm not working. It is a great balance for all of us. I am also fortunate enough that my husband makes enough to support us and I could choose to stay at home. But I don't. I would go insane and it's great that you are making this video to help those who do stay home, stay sane.
I am in Minnesota and had my last baby this past March. The weather was HORRIBLE and I couldn't go outside at all. I felt soooo cooped up, bored, and alone. I ended up cutting my maternity leave short (to 10 weeks) and went back to work. I immediately felt better.
My children have always loved daycare and I see daycares, teachers, family, friends, and anyone else in their lives as bonus positive influences. I think they are lucky to have the opportunity to spend time with these people.
The only thing that makes me cringe when it comes to the conversation about SAHM vs. working outside of the home is when SAHM's say "I choose to raise my child and not have someone else raise my child." That is a horrible thing to say. I didn't make it through this whole video yet and I am hoping you don't say this. (If you do, I'm not going to unsubscribe or anything crazy like that) I would like to just remind anyone who is reading this that it is a very hurtful thing to say to a mom that works outside of the home. My husband and I RAISE our children. Daycare and anyone else who spends time with our children throughout the day, are positive influences in their life and spend quality time with them. One of the teachers at our center just thanked me the other day for sharing my daughter with them:)
Question: Do SAHM's think teachers raise their kids once they go to school? No. It's the same thing.
Anyway, great video... take care :)
I've been a stay at home mom, too. I agree it's a difficult job. Yes, a babysitter now and then was necessary to have adult time with the husband or alone, for sanity's sake! And giving back to the community is so worthwhile. One thing many people don't realize is that the summer holidays for parents who both work are just as stressful as the winter holidays. There's a charity near and dear to my heart that gives summer camp opportunities to kids whose parents can't take the time off in the summer to be with them. Now that our daughter is 14, I have a lot more time to volunteer, and I love it! Thanks for sharing, Marnie.
I loved this! Kudos to you for posting this. It was thoughtful, insightful and thought provoking. I took the other route I was a working mother and man was I given grief for that decision. My friends and family always had something to say about how I should stay home since both my husband and I made very good money. Then the day came when I no longer had a husband and it was just me and the children. It was wonderful to be able to support my children on my own. I also opted to hire a nanny to pick them up from school, clean and cook. So when I came home from work, I helped with homework, read stories to them, helped out with science projects, baked stuff for the PTA fund raisers etc.The Nanny did not raise my children I did, she just made it easier for me to come home and do mom things with the kids. Let me tell you that was another "issue" with my so called friends who had absolutely no problem voicing their opinion about what I was doing with "my children". I finally got fed up with the Negative Nellies told them where to go and did me. Now all three are adults two have children of their own. None have ever done drugs, been arrested, they all finished college and are doing work that they love. One of my daughters opted to stay home with her children and I did not say one negative thing. Like you said, you do what works for your family. I think as women we should support the choices our sisters make. What works for some may not work for others and that is okay. Again thanks for posting this!
I just found your channel and can i say- i am in love?! lol I was watching your "mom" channel and then it brought me here. I agree with basically everything in this video- great topic to share on! :)
Thank you!! I'm so glad you found me!!
I just came across your channel and I also live in San Antonio. Your video came into my life at the right time as I have 2 under 2 and I struggle with being a stay at home mom. I know I'm very blessed to be able to be with my kids but I feel like I have lost a big part of myself. My job is so rewarding but sometimes I wish I was more than "just someone's mom". Thank you for your suggestion I think I'm just lacking some social interaction since I talk to my little ones all day!
I just started following you today and already love all the videos I've watched! You're great!
Thank you, Victoria! I’m so glad you’re here!
What a blessing to have been at home with your kids. I wish I had had that opportunity. I do (and have done) a lot of volunteer work despite working full-time. I think it all boils down to time management, prioritizing and carving out some "me" time, regardless of whether you are a SAH or working outside the home mom. Thanks for sharing!
I am New to your channel.
I think you are a breath of fresh air.
I absolutely love your channel.
I totally agree with this vlog.
When we had our two beautiful children, I chose to be a stay at home mum.
I went back to work when my oldest was 18 years old.
I worked for 10 years, I am officially retired as of last September.
It does feel weird and wonderful at the same time. x
Thank you for sharing this to us. You have a good outlook in your life and I admire you for that. Each and everyone of us have our own paths in life...it's how we travel these paths that counts. Keep smiling!
I'm 51 and have a son who is about to go into the 11th grade, and a daughter who is going into 8th grade. I agree that in some ways they need me more than ever. I'm so thankful I have the same situation you do, that we can afford for me to stay home. In the beginning, it was a choice that was very hard to justify financially, but we both knew it was the family we wanted. I have volunteered a lot over the years, but not as much as you. All things are personal choices and no one should judge. I think you were just sharing, and I loved this video. I never paid anyone to stay with my kids, but here and there I had friends help me out. I did have a cleaning service every two weeks for a long time. In small towns this can be very cheap, usually just one woman...I paid anywhere from 5 dollars an hour to 15, and those prices were set by the cleaning ladies. Ladies, I support those who want to work, so everyone should just support each other's choices. :)
I'm 43 and a SAHM to a 6 year old and a 3 year old. It is the best thing I have ever done, but also the hardest thing I have ever done. It can be so draining, and so ...so....hmmm. Tiring? Annoying? Lonely? But at the same time great and I love being so prsent for my children. I also know I am so lucky to be fortuntae enough to be able to stay home. Anyway, thanks for the video! I feel like we have a lot in common and it is nice to have found videos from someone I can actually relate to.
I enjoyed this so much! I could relate very well because I am a stay at home mom of three, full time volunteer at the children's hospital, and part-time RUclipsr! Congrats on 4 years of YT...I love your channel! xo Jen
Loved your video and hearing about your journey! It seems to me that you are an excellent role model for stay at home moms. My journey was different, but being a teacher in my children's school district was a wonderful option for me! I knew all the families and their siblings in my children's school! My vacations were the same and I got home when they did! Granted they came to school early with me and left late! They loved it! My summers were always spent with them as well. It also offered me an excellent retirement which I am truly loving now. I also get to pay it foward by watching my grandson in the summer. I also still volunteer in my school district. I admire both of our choices very much. It is all about doing the best you can with your decisions! Thanks, Marnie!
You had the ideal work situation! What a wonderful career you've had, and I bet your kids are grateful that you were around for them!
I have been on the fence about becoming a stay at home mom. I think your advise was excellent and not preachy! You make some excellent points about always being mom and never done working. I love the idea of volunteering too. It's something I have done most of my adult life. My plan is to stay at home with my son when he starts kindergarten. Thankfully my husband and I are in a good place to make it happen. Thank you Marnie!!
I'm a stay at home mom with a 15 month old. It's soooo true about what you said, "Your job as a mom never ends!!" Just subscribed!
Hi Marnie, Thank you so much for this video. I am a stay at home mom who really needed to see this video today. As a mom of 4, two teenagers and two elementary school kids it is sometimes rough. I know I'm blessed and am thankful. Thank you for putting a fresh spin on things. I am a new subscriber and love your videos. I find myself looking forward to them.
I am a stay at home mom too and i know what it means. I couldn't agree more that this is a job. It is just sad, that the covernment doesn't appreciate this job enough to give you social guarantees. At least in my country.
Thank you so much for this video- you were classy as always and not a bit preachy! I got so much to think about and i am sure your thoughts-advice changed me to be better in my mom-job. Thank you!
I'm a sahm too and I love it! I treat it like a job too. I've made sure I appreciate it and learn something new everyday. Can't say enough
I was interested to hear your thoughts - not because I'm a SAHM, but because when I gave up work to look after my disabled husband, I was presented with many of the same frustrations that you talk about. Eventually I got to volunteering and I think it's a great way to meet people whatever your age or circumstances and to feel the fulfilment of doing something for others. I'm enjoying going back over your older videos at the moment!
Well said. Especially loved what you said about volunteering at your children's school. In my neck of the woods, our version of the PTA is a PAC (Parent Advisory Committee) and active parents benefit everyone! Volunteering at the school has also given me and my children common ground and I love knowing their friends. As my "baby" heads to high school (grade 8 here) I find myself navigating new waters and investigating new ways to stay involved. I really appreciated your respectful attitude toward the multitude of choices out there for families. It is so easy to devalue the choices of others in order to validate our own choices. Glad you and your husband successfully negotiated roles that work for you.
I agree with you on this topic;-) I am so happy in the position I am in. By far the hardest, most wonderful job I have ever had and ever want:-) I love being here for my family, and my husband and I show appreciation for each other.
Thank you so much for this video. Very helpful to me in transitioning from career life to sahm!
Just found your channel, love how honest you are. I am a stay at home mom and have family that just doesn't get it. They try to make me feel so guilty for not earning a paycheck, do you deal with family or friends that don't approve of your decision and how do you deal with it?
Thank You for your insight on this topic...it's always so touchy with people. I too have been fortunate to have the support of my husband to be able to do what I have wanted to do career wise and I have opted to work outside of the home since my daughter was 6 months old. I think it is important to remember that there are instances where a women "chooses" to work as opposed to opting to stay at home. I had either option available to me but knew that being a stay at home mother was not where I would be the happiest or most effective. I chose to have a career outside of the home and that has worked well for my family. We have always managed to find a balance that works for the three of us.
What I always wonder about is what is going to happen with the notion of "traditional" family when it comes time for our children to marry....Your boys that are used to your style of tradition (women staying home and taking on all the domestic duties) will be looking to marry the girl that I am raising that is familiar with the women working outside of the home and pursuing her own career. I am very curious to see how that is going meld and what type of compromise they are going to have to come to. I know that my daughter has very distinct goals and ambitions career wise that do not include be a stay at home mother (at this point).....do your boys ever talk about what kind of women it is that they hope to marry?
Since you're asking for my opinion, and what is right for my family, it would be my hope that my boys marry women like me and all the other women in their family-educated, who have a career, but who want to stay home and raise their children. That's what they're familiar with, and what the majority of families are like in our social circle. If they choose a different path, we'll deal with it when the time comes. But first, they need to finish school and get a job that can support a family! ;)
I absolutely loved your video! I am also a stay at home Mom of 4 1/2 years to my little princess and it can definitely get challenging. I am still somewhat new at this and when you said you approach staying at home a job that really stuck with me. I loved that term because I struggle with duties and what I should being doing and when. I would love to know what your schedule would be for a child of almost 5 years old. I would also love to see more videos on this. I think your approach to this subject was spot on and amazing especially for us newbies. Thanks so much fr sharing!!!! Oh and I'm also your newest follower on Instagram. ;-)
Thank you so much, Christy! It's hard to remember that far back, but I'll try! At that point, most of my schedule was built around the child's schedule. I do remember "nap time"-even if they didn't sleep, we always scheduled quiet time in their rooms. It helped them to learn how to entertain themselves, and then we didn't have cranky, tired kids in the early evenings! And in the summer, we did lots of "field trips" in the mornings-libraries, museums, zoo, walking around the mall, Botanic Garden, play dates...then down time at home, once it got hotter in the afternoons and then I could clean the house.
I live in SA too. What cleaning company do u use? I've been thinking about contracting one. I work full time and have a 6 yr & 10 yr old and I need all the help I can get!!
Monica-send me an email at msgoldgirl@gmail.com and I can give you their info. It's a company owned by 2 women and they usually come with a total of 3 ladies to clean my house. They're incredibly trustworthy and they do a great job.
Great video, I have two children 5 and 3! Hardest job I've ever had but I try and stay organised and then I really love it! I no longer beat myself up about bad days either, I just roll with it but that's only now and again anyway 😊 xxx
Thanks so much for sharing and it's wonderful how much volunteer work you do! I've been working 3days/week for 5 years now as an electrical engineer. It's a decent balance although I feel like I'm usually spread thin. I definitely find that my days at home with the girls are much more demanding than work!!! I'm spent and waiting for Dad to come home by 5:00. Thanks for opening up the dialogue!
How did you handle your last child going off to kindergarten? My last one is going next month and I'm having a really hard time with it.
I sobbed uncontrollably for about an hour and then met a bunch of other kindergarten moms for a "boo-boo" breakfast. Once I realized how much "me" time I now had, and that I was volunteering in the school 2-3x a week, I got over it rather quickly!! So call your girlfriends and set up that brunch for the first day of school-send out invites or get your PTA to set it up. Our PTA now does that and it's a great way to meet the other moms in your child's grade.
Thanks so much for the advice! I plan on volunteering a lot at my kids school but I'm just still having a hard time letting go of my baby!! But I know it's part of life and my children growing up. Thanks for making this video! :)
Such a good video! I love that you said to treat your role as a stay at home mom as a job. I think it defiantly helps to treat it that way.
Hi! Time away! Yes, I was really encouraged by that segment of this video as I have a college girl that also comes 4 hours a week to watch my 3yo and 18mo. I use the time to run errands, go to my doctor's appointments, and the time away really gives me perspective. BUT, I realized I really need to not run around during this time and decompress!!