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MST3k 313 - Earth vs the Spider
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- Опубликовано: 19 май 2011
- A scientist declares martial law and saves Earth from a peace-loving, helpful arachnid. There's also plenty of lip and tongue action in this one, so parents, be forewarned.
/ mst3k
mst3konline.blo... - a list of every episode available for online streaming!
Professor Kingman, the science teacher, is played by Ed Kemmer.
Kemmer was the inspiration for the character that Steve McQueen would later portray in "The Great Escape." Kemmer had been a POW at the prison camp that the camp in the movie was based on.
He learned his acting skills at the camps drama club and used the training to assist in lying and manipulating the prison guards.
Pretty interesting story actually.
He was also P-51 fighter pilot.
The interesting bits of information always seem to pop up on these mst3k videos, and I love it!
Love good ol Kissy face McQueen. Met him and Ally Mcgraw during the filming of the getaway , in El Paso.
I love how Carol's mom shows absolutely no grief over the death of her husband. And the high school kids look over 35, at least. Especially Joe.
"Hugo, we're only little kids."
"What are you talking about?! You're 42!"
That’s the same actor that played the drunk captain in Bloodlust. Also, the actor that played Carol’s dad had small roles on 3 other episodes, including playing the king in The Magic Sword. And that sheriff (Gene Roth) was obviously in some other episodes as well, including Tormented (with Merritt Stone, who played Carol’s dad). MST3K did a sketch about being confused as to which actor was which. Sorry, I like stupid trivia and recognizing all the little bit part and character actors. It’s kind of strange that Joel makes that comment (“do I have SUCKER tattooed on my forehead?”) as that’s like that actors most memorable line from Bloodlust! (He takes the gun and says like, “see you later, SUCKERS!”).
@19:28, we see a 25 year-old high school student passing a note to a 35 year old high school student. 😆😆
@@tjmmcd1 He looks late 40s!
For real, we talk shit about people in their twenties playing teens, forgetting this shit existed LONG before
The intros to this show always had the feel, for me, of three brothers hanging out at home on a rainy day and coming up with wacky ideas to keep themselves sane (even though two of the brothers are robots). Joel is the oldest, only slightly saner brother.
Yup. MST3K is about friendship. The show gives you friends even when you're all alone.
Yeah, joel is basically the cool older brother that i never had.
I love the deadpan delivery of Joel selling, well, anything.
His old standup routine was pretty much that for like an hour.
"Let me tell you a lil' bout myself : Im butt-ugly, drive a truck, and hate spiders"
these joel episodes are gold >
You'd think that the horrible death of her father and being attacked twice by a giant spider would at least earn Carol a day off from school.
Carol Reminds Me Of Another Girl, She Reminds Me Of Someone Else Who Lost Her Father But Received One More Present From Him (Example: Bracelet, Yoyo). I Named Her Carol.
ruclips.net/video/Yr8ryv0p5Eg/видео.html
59:13 Wow. The "car won't start during a monster attack" cliché goes as far back as 1958.
Monster pays a kid to remove spark plugs or syphon the gas.
It was also used earlier in 1955's Tarantula, with a then brand new Ford Fairlane Sunliner.
iT goes back as far as cars.
this cliche actually dates back to caveman times, where it was commonly known as the “stone wheel won’t start rolling during a chase by a sabertooth” trope
It's kind of like going to your neighbor's house and criticizing their culinary skills. You're a guest in *my* house. If you don't like what I'm serving, you're welcome to order a pizza or go home. People come here because they're fans of Mystery Science Theater 3000. If you're not, that's perfectly fine, but you'd be wise to not complain about it here. You'll find no quarter.
Did you ever think that your comment would have still been first these many years later?
I’m just glad you and other fans are posting these full episodes.... thank you
I like your work analogkid.
Ii
¡
If you're still out there, you got me through the pandemic, A.K.
Boy, Carol's mom is positively bereft over her husband's terrifying death at the hands of a giant spider. As a matter of fact, everyone is so freaking blasé about this guy's death. Even Carol is more interested in her gift. Totally normal.
It's the unbearable sexual tension between Carol & boy with sticky hands that permeates throughout the entire movie.
Did they hookup? Did Carol wear her Daddy's Pearl's?
Did the giant spider feel the burn of discrimination from Theraphosidaes of normal size?
What's happening I'm confused.
Oh my goodness its fighting.
"I don't want you getting bad grades just because Dad's wormfood."
Well, Carol's dad was a drunk who often didn't come home for days apparently. Maybe they were relieved.
😂😂😂😂😂
@stephenpmurphy591
❤😂😂😅
The fact that "Bill W." (founder of Alcoholics Anonymous) is listed in the credits under "thanks to."
Well, that...that actually make sense..
@@rabidrabbitshuggers What were they thankful for? I need to know. Thankful for what?
@@anydaynow To be alive. Smh
WE THINK NOT!
The fact that you know that is amazing👏👏👏✌
Aaaah, the episode that birth the long running gag of "Earth vs Soup"
"There's an opening down here!"
Cool, fill out an application...
.
I laughed way harder at that than is normal.
59:57 "Joe Doakes....." carryover from the New Joysey driver LOL
I NEVER get tired of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 😂😂😂😂😂❣️
And remember, when giving instructions on how to speak, always do so with in an oppressively slow and monotonous drone.
Bueller?
Sale at Penney's! Wire racks half off! Everyone needs a wire rack!
Was thinking the same thing! Boring and unpleasant as they come XD
@@gorflunk This is sadly true right now in 2020! RIP Penney's.
Ah the 50's! When teenage girls went on life-and-death battles in mysterious caves wearing skirts and cute shoes
Carol Reminds Me Of Another Girl, She Reminds Me Of Someone Else Who Lost Her Father But Received One More Present From Him (Example: Bracelet, Yoyo)
. I Named Her Carol.
ruclips.net/video/Yr8ryv0p5Eg/видео.html
Yes, the 50's when Teenagers were 25 years old. June Kenney, who play Carol was 25 when this was made.
Anime before anime was anime
That would be an entertaining premise so long as it wasn't in a terribly dated Black and white movie with a thin plot about a massive spider
@@fuzzface8252 Harrison Ford was 31 in American Graffiti and Stockard Channing was 34 in Grease, so it wasn't just a 50's thing, as both of these movies were made in the 70's
"Earth" implies multiple nations. A more accurate title for the movie would have been "Podunk Police Department and Community College vs The Spider"
***** You were alive in 1958?
antonialeigh
Hee hee....I don't know when you were born (but I suspect you could be old enough! I always assume I'm younger than everyone else...you'da thought by fifty that'd stop....still waiting!), or maybe it was a localized phenomenon, but I was born in 63, and, in most parts of the country (judging by my later acquaintances from elsewhere's shared experiences), I tell ya true: back then, we believed a whole lot more hogwash about our "great country" than we can possibly swallow now... So, while on the one hand I agree with you re: "as opposed to now" in that "America" as a corporate entity or over-riding identity still seems to think itself the Boss (or Bully) of the Yard, whoa.... gotta give us old farts credit for starting to spot elephants and naked emperors that even older farts will die happily oblivious of. And so I can also totally laugh at my old 1970s proud'n'patriotic fully-indoctrinated self a la #LeonardWho 's allusion and the Impressively Naive, Pathetically Ethnocentric and Bloviated Americans of Olde.... Har, it's so funny, yet so sad, that we've come so far and are still where we are! Doh! And so here we are, a melting pot watching MST3K, at the confluence where us bloviated old farts can laugh at our old selves _and_ be kept honest by farts not yet old and thus find redemption! (And fyi, I hope you know this whole monologue was an MST3K-bad-movie-dialogue-induced side-effect, and I'm sure I'll start speaking less peculiar, with pleasing life and enthusiasm, showing my culture and well-developed personality any time now :-)
antonialeigh huh huh...huh huh..69.
Kevin Schaefer Or, that somehow the US was not part of the Earth.Therefore, if a spider was in the US it was not on Earth.
Better yet, that foolish critics manage to re-interpret a movie business decision to set a move within the area of interest of its target audience as some kind of political statement. Or gone to the expense of filming in a foreign country and adding language or dubbing complexity.
No, none of that. There were no marketing considerations regarding the film's production. It was all a political allusion... idiots!
Kevin Schaefer The hell are you people talking about in my channel?
Gotta love them 47-year-old high school students.
They turn into 60-year-old college students in "Is This Love?"
@@DrThunder88 then they enroll in “The old School” from Ring of Terror
"Soup on all fours?"
"Of course! What do you think, soup is a biped??"
xD
Just found out Bert I. Gordon only died 8 months ago at the age of 100.
MST3K is the only thing that makes the film watchable.
Those 35 year old kids are lucky the cave ceiling was made of polystyrene or those huge rocks burying them might have hurt when they fell.
And the 35 yr old rock band conductor. lmaof
@@ajs3994 Skip Young was 28.
Earth vs the Spider? It should be titled Small Town vs the Spider or Two Kids in a Cave vs the Spider. Possibly re-brand it a documentary called Pesticides and You: The Wonders of DDT.
LOL! I love how the damn spider keeps getting bigger with every shot.. When the kids look at it in the gym, it's the size of a car. When it starts terrorizing the town it's the size of a house :P
They go through 7 - 9 instars and get bigger each time.
Her father got eaten by a giant spider and they're making her go to school?
I know! I mean damn were they not hugged as a child??
"I'll put my money on the spider."
Well, with so many people with arachnophobia, that's not too dangerous a bet.
I love the many, many minutes of an ominous blue screen at the end.
Watching this because Bert I. Gordon died yesterday at the age of 100.
"I don't want you getting bad grades just because Dad's worm food."
That was the weirdest scene! Like, that was the most unmoved Mom on the face of the planet! It's like she planned & hoped for his death everyday. 😒☠️🤫
You gonna be the worm face.
Next on Unsolved Mysteries, a mother, a giant spider, and a huge life insurance policy for a suddenly missing father and husband. We'll explain the mystery and the arachno-romance after these commercials!
1:02:15 -- "They could have waited until they got to the hotel" gets me every time!
The first time the sheriff goes into the cave he ignores all of the human skeletons laying everywhere. He must be a cop from my town.
Maybe he put the skeletons in the cave??
I love how the cave's so well lit inside, apparently it has its own small sun in every chamber
Please exercise proper apostrophic discipline. There are only a limited number of apostrophes; they are a nonrenewable resource. If we use them all up in frivolous and gratuitous punctuation, what will future generations of writers think of us?
@@ericminch Today's kids are doing things like eating Tide Pods, I think seeing me adding extra, unneeded punctuation is the LEAST of their problems.
@@joesmoe71 sounds tasty n yummy
@@ericminch DUDE. Get with quant'm mechanics. Comma's grow like weeds, and you can just float, one up, there' , , , any ole' time. They, commas, are an indestructible resource, providing valuable, job, opportunities, for grammar, you know what's.
it's one of those self-luminescent caves. I read about them in my algebra II class in high school.
Don't open beer bottles with your teeth. Lol
RIP Bert I Gordon, 2023.
Carol is grieving like a Boomwr and her mom is of the Silent Generation:
Carol: It’s all about me! He was getting me a present. Where’s my present?
Mom: Chill out, Carol, you’re gonna lose a few people. Times are tough. Get over it.
The posse just totally ignored all the skeletons
“Look spider, all of us got together and voted YOU OUT” makes me laugh every time.
This was my very first MST3K episode. It’s a classic in my book.
48:01 Ordinarily called a bird spider
Joel: "Yeah, and this one's called a big flippin' bird spider"
That info movie at the beginning was hilarious! Plus the fact I understood most of them just fine, and the fact that this guy doesn't take into account things such as fear, or a speaking disability.
The science teacher calls the spider an insect.
Probably went to Trump University.
@@Dresdentrumpet Hope all is well with you.
Oh, how sharper than a serpent's tooth!
-----A certain "science teacher" from Wellesley College who's run for president a lot speaks of male menstruation & pregnancy, & soliciting donations to keep polar bears from drowning, & she's acclaimed as the smartest in the Global Room. "Tomato/toMAHto", "Insect/arachnid"; let's call the whole thing off, if you're gonna get an orange face about it!
-----Rematch 2020? Bring her---it---on! The Spider AND Hillary, stalking a worldwide web to "spew" (a little libword there) venom at Donald? Bring it ON!!
As long as he doesn't racially discriminate against aforementioned insect it is allowed. I think.I guess.I don't know.I go now.
Wade Carmen I went to Trump University and now I make $470,000 a year at Goldman Sachs as a financial analyst. I’m so tired of people shitting on my Alma Matter.
3 people must've accidentally clicked the "dislike" button.. because who in their right mind could dislike MST3K?
Ever see season 11?
@@bigduke5902 I don't think season 11 was bad
I just miss TV's Frank and Trace together!!!!
Just decided to play this tonight, not just in memory of Bert I. Gordon.
It's Carol's-Dad Cavern!"
Use plenty of lip and tongue action! A legendary expression was born.
Can't wait to see if it says "The Spider . . . as Itself" at the end.
H. L. Mencken has splendid teeth. Whoever thought up MST3K is a genius.
It kills me that they see human skeletons and act like it's an everyday thing in a cave.
You know, the funny thing is, many species of spider like this actually DO make noises, like howling to attract mates, but it's so low and quiet, we can't hear it until amplified many times louder.
I used to play with that thing maker when I was a kid, I loved it, and we didn't get burned, we were careful!
You usually get burned once, and then learn not to
Making fun of the Sheriff's laugh is the best.
No wonder Joe's the only student with a car. He looks like he's at least 35...
Been to CT Live 4 times. Sat right up front. Met entire cast after every show. It's like having friends over to your house to riff with only it's the originals!!! Incredible experience if you're a real big fan.
With all the KISS-bashing you'd think they'd eventually riff on KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park, lord knows it needs one
+ToruKun1 That's one of the most requested movies for Rifftrax, so it may happen one day. Then again KISS would probably demand 99% of the profits if they did.
+mechachrist that's exactly what has happened to everyone who has tried to re-release it. either Kiss or NBC own the rights and neither would license it to anyone.
And deal with Gene and Ace's lawyers? NO THANK YOU!
Gene and Paul own it too tightly.
Earth vs the spider is a classic 50s creature feature.
a while ago, I was watching a mike era episode and I thought"Wow! these kind of dirty jokes would never have been made with Jole around!" I was proven wrong within the first 7 minutes of this episode.
#keepcirculatingthetapes
"We call the positive pole what?"
"Lech Walesa"
FanBritLit Solid.
(umm, arity)
"Oh someone must've puked big time!" XD I don't know why, but that struck me funny!
"Send down a body bag, make sure there's room for a bracelet"
"I'll just stay out here bark out fat ass belligerent orders!" XD Can't stop laughing for some reason!
Just watched the opening again..."I drive a truck, I'm butt ugly and I hate spiders"... laughing so hard I couldn't breath!
I love when 40 year olds get casted as high school students, it never gets old
56:06 I love how the Bass player keeps going, until someone gets his attention and he’s like “OH SHIT” and he splits with the rest of the band.
That's Plumstead from Ozzie & Harriet
Every time that professor refers to the spider as an "insect" I just wanna slap him.
+Hylian Fox Just remember he's an actor repeating a script, slap the writer.
+Hylian Fox We can take turns.
I love spiders. I used to have a poor little crippled wolf spider. I got him a fly & he ran off so happy. A few days later I walked by the same spot & he waved his one good front leg at me. So, I fed him for quite a while, for a male. I doubt he ever had any babies because he couldn't court properly.
Well this one you would not want, But it would want YOU for dinner, Muhhaahahahah.
They had to dumb it down for the masses.
J. Jonah Jameson calls spiders a menace, one in particular.
We told the sheriff, but he started on about the square-cube law and the arthropod respiratory system.
I would just like to add, I been sittin' here a lot longer than you think I have
We call the positive pole what?
Tom Servo: Lech Walesa.
LOL!!!
She yells in the cave and almost starts an avalanche. The sheriff shoots in it and nothing happens?
+Mocha Latte All the loose stalactites had fallen earlier thanks to her. That's how I'm head-canoning it.
A Adams Have you ever heard a woman scream?
@@wadecarmen7501 At least they knew how to write year.
@@realitycheck3363 Hey now, the random RUclips reverse-racist could have meant "era".
NikovK---In my era, which was about a year long, reverse-racists got ridiculed. In this era, they get awards (from each other) for "courage".
37:55 "Look for a dried guy in a silk bag, pass it down."
+Jeffrey Riley "Vermin's gonna kill my brother at the Savoy theater tonight!" "That's not what I said." "No, but I know this grapevine."
Love the rat scooting across the walkway!! Great attention to detail!! One of the first things that caught my attention!!
"I have eight legs, I wanna dance!"
Worked for Dr. Octopus.
Earth vs Soup sounds like the perfect script for Shia LaBeouf "nononononono no nonono nononono"
@@christianresearchproject No, he's an actual cannibal.
Fred Ziffel at 52:48, who also played in The Amazing Colossal Man.
"Double Golden Slasher Time!" Kevin Murphy is freakin awesome.
Who would have thought you could get a lesson on public speaking before a movie?? lol
That was about public speaking? I thought it was one of those Nina Hartley guides...
+analogkid01 ZING!!!!!
They knew we wouldn't be here AFTER the movie.
@@andrewfrankovic6821 Yeah, I remember when I lost my virginity too...
Dr. Erhardt! YAY! The final reference to Larry from KTMA and Season 1.
42:53 "He died as he lived...with jelly all over his face."
Hahahahaha
You learn with the creepy crawler maker, you burn with the creepy crawler maker.
"Yep, it's a big pork-link sausage. Jimmy Dean tried to kill ya."
"This man is wearing a push up bra, now he is pleasing!"
HAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!! XD
filmed at jeffry epstines playpen!
@@caroltenge5147 Those were all training bras.
"Curdless phone" broke Frank!
"Don't worry, we've had him put down." 9:16 😂
And that, folks, is why they call it the "Wreck Room". (ba-dum ching)
Fantastic five star for this one totally entertaining must watch twice⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Thanks so much for sharing 👍🏼👍🏼
Analogkid01
(Psst...channel owner here...I have a low tolerance for Joel-bashing, so...put a lid on it.)
Man, aren't other people's opinions just THE WORST?! Stupid bastards can't just think like me... And so far, I don't think there's any way for someone to remain unaffected by the horror of another opinion
@@jamesduncan6729 bashing the creator of the show while watching the show is not an opinion but rather an oxymoron.
How could anyone not like MST3K? I absolutely love it! I think those guys are brilliant. Plus, I owe the little robots. They also help me keep my sanity. lol. Here's to all of us who love the show! Having said that, there were a couple of movies that were so bad that not even MST3K could make bearable to watch. Forgive me for this sacrelige. lol
LOL @ Frank's "I see what you did there" face at the Curd-less Phone pun
The best line, "Their in somebody's tonsils", just when I said out loud to the movie, "Well how far do you think he went in this large cave", sarcastic humor. Love it!!!!
My uncle is one of those poor dumb kids that got lawn darts banned. Threw it right through his foot
I know, if only more shorts were able to convey a semester's worth of higher education in a five-minute time span...
(Calling Father Guido Sarducci...)
You can time-travel just by waiting: a semester of education can be pressed into a five-second time span, & that's including the trailer.
oh boy, i get to walk by that poster again!
Thanks for uploading this. It had been too long since I watched it. I think it's time to go back and watch more early episodes.
57:58 "Herman! Stop driving so fast!" - - "Mwhahah!" Hysterical!
Kind of scary to think everybody in these films are likely dead now.
6:51 "Lie, lie and lie. And check your zipper."
@MasterLobster Do people really watch MST3K expecting JUST the movie? Do these people even know what MST3K is?!
That's how I got turned onto MST3K. Spent the night at a buddies house planning on golfing but it was raining too hard. He channel surfed until he found "Track of the Moon Beast." I was reading until I heard him say "I wish those smart asses at the bottom of the screen would shut the fuck up." He still despises the show as he really loves B movies of just about all kinds.
@@indy_go_blue6048 you seem to have good taste in shows, and questionable taste in friends.
@@indy_go_blue6048 Sigh.
The blonde chick and Mike were the hunted teens in Bloodlust with Robert Reed.
Did they ever find the clam bake???
@@Thompsongs Hahahahaha 😂
"I'm guessing the film isn't about him."
I am so grateful that you uploaded this that I did not skip the terrible thirty second preroll ad.
I was under the bleachers at the ball game and that's when a cop chased me out and asked what I was doin'
Earth vs The Spider is kind of a special episode for me, it was my first ever MST3K episode and introduced me to Joel, Mike and the Bots! And now... I finally understand that Dr. Erhardt joke! ^_^