Bluey and Anticipatory Grief
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- Опубликовано: 5 июл 2024
- Bluey is an Australian preschool show that follows the Heeler family. While its primary demographic is children ages five to seven years old, adults have found comfort in its positive stories that teach important life lessons. In the Bluey Season 2 episode Granddad, we're met with the concepts of anticipatory grief, theory of mind and empathy after Chili's Father, Mort, has had a serious case of heart worm.
Worried about her Father, Chili chases Bingo, Bluey and Mort down in hopes of getting him to rest. In this video we analyze the behavior of each character, and talk about how the generational differences between the four shape their reactions.
00:00 CONTENT WARNING
00:42 Introduction
01:49 Theory of Mind
04:09 Grandad Analysis
10:21 Conclusion
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I'd also like to mention that Chili's grief may not be entirely anticipatory. We never see Chili's mom throughout the series outside of pictures and the mention of a dance that Chili and her sister Brandy used to do which their mom taught them. If I were to guess, I'd say Chili's mom has already passed away before the start of the series, maybe even as early as a year or two in-universe. Chili having already gone through the pain of losing one parent makes her that much more desperate to keep Mort in good health. "Grandad" takes place before Brandy and Chili reconciled in "Onesies" so from Chili's perspective, her dad is the only family she has left.
Edit: Welp. Looks like this theory holds a lot more water after "Dragon".
It's still anticipatory, but I do agree that it's more than just anticipatory.
Ntm that her and bandit went through a miscarriage
One possible solution to the "How do they afford all this" problem; Mort reacted to wife's passing by leaving a lot of the the inheritance preemptively to the girls. Chilli and Bandit bought a house almost outright with this, with the result that Chilli has a lot of emotional investment in the house (See her reaction at the beginning of "Hammerbarn").
The same thing has already happened to me recently, my Mum passed away several days ago and I'm 17 :') 💖💖
Now that the episode "Dragon" just premiered it looks like Chili's mom's death has now been confirmed.
As a 25 year old with an 85 year old father who had a bad fall recently, I’d like to thank you for making this video. It’s reassuring to know that there’s a word for this feeling.
I really needed this right now. Thank you.
my parents are much younger, in their mid 50s and are very healthy for their age but even I often worry about their eventual death decades from now and what I’ll do without them..
My mom finally passed away after having early-onset dementia for about a decade. I had an entire decade to feel anticipatory grief. The episode “Granddad” hit me really hard because my dad is all I have left, and I want him to stay healthy because, just like Chilli says, “I still need him.”
I only have one grandparent left too, my lovely Nanna ❤
So extremely sorry that you had to go through that, I hope your time with your loved ones continues to be worthy of your memory.
as someone who lost her mother a month before her 23rd birthday, thank you for this.
I'm very sorry for your loss, I can't imagine what going through that was like. 💙
It's so comforting to know there's a term for this feeling. I remember being about 9 years old and finally realizing my parents were going to die someday and I couldn't stop crying. I never wanted to grow up and my only comfort/distraction over the years was reminding myself that I was still young and didn't have to worry about that for a very long time. I'm 22 now and I've shed tears within the past few weeks, anticipating my parent's deaths, not knowing what I'll do when it inevitably happens. Both of them are in good health and are still in their 40s but it's getting harder and harder not to think about/be bothered by it as I watch them age more and more. Does anyone here have advice/good coping mechanisms around subjects like this?
Honestly, I really don't have any piece of advice or coping mechanism, but what usually helps me is the fact that, when it happens, at least we enjoyed what we had before. So I just try to have a good time with my own parents whenever we see each other, as different as they are from me. That's all I can do.
Bro my Mum died recently, she was 46 :( my Dad is in 40s too and I'm 17. My advice is not to distract yourself too much, get the feelings out, do activites you enjoy, surround yourself with family and friends. Find some way to express yourself 😊💖
@@bellaschatzi6212 Yo same I watch both of those shows with genuine interest ^-^
Find things in common with your parents and spend time with them. Death be damned, you're gonna make good memories. If you get into fights with them, anticipatory grief is a good way to let the little things go and manage any sort of anger you may feel about something they disagree with.
I'm sure there's other examples of using anticipatory grief as a tool instead of the hinderance that it is, but pander to their wants and needs. Watch them light up when they recommend something to you and you actually go through with it. Wear that ugly shirt they got you with well meaning, call them just to talk because you enjoy their company, ask them if they need anything from the store, get them something from "back in their day", catch them overexerting themselves and ask them if you can help them in any way to sneak the work load off them without outright telling them to sit and watch their limitations.
Remember they're going through anticipatory grief themselves and they need a distraction from it as much as you do. If they see you as someone whos independent and able to provide for themselves, their thoughts aren't going to be riddled with what you're going to do when they're gone.
They need to see you as someone who can stand on your own two feet and someone whos going to mourn them when they're gone, so you have to be self sufficient and loving in a way that only emotional maturity lets you love.
As a college kid whose dad passed about a year ago, it might be less relevant to your situation, but the thing that helps me most is appreciating the moments and experiences that you have shared/are sharing with them, and accepting that it's a thing that's going to hurt regardless and that it's okay for it to? I know that my dad won't get to see me graduate or make it through hard times or get married or anything, and it's okay for that to hurt. But I also know that he got to see me grow up and make friends and dye my hair and get through high school and all the other memories that I have with him. And that helps a lot, even if it hurts to think about. Just knowing that you've had experiences and made memories with them that will still have happened, even if they aren't there anymore, is really comforting (to me at least).
My sister passed away suddenly earlier this year, we're both in our early 20s. I've been worried about my parents dying for as long as I can remember, but now it's on my mind a lot more. I always thought I would go through it with my sister but now I have to do it alone.
I felt this when my dad turned 50. Thanks for putting a name to the feelings.
50 is kinda crazy
@@Msanimefanatic25 I can't say anything, I'm over halfway there, lol
@@cozykomala congrats on the wisdom and experience 👏🏽
I've always mentally grouped this type of feeling into anxiety, but anticipatory grief is a good word for it. A lot of the time our worries about the future really do manifest as a type of mourning for something that hasn't happened yet, and it can take a huge emotional and physical toll. It's also incredibly difficult to get over, because you can't exactly heal and move past an event that hasn't happened yet.
This hits really hard. My parents were basically 40 when I was born, so I'm having to deal with this much sooner than some people. They're both 60+ now, and my dad has had a stroke. My mom hasn't been to see a doctor in years and nothing I say will convince her to go. Both of them have family history of cancer. It's been causing me a lot of anxiety recently, and I've worked myself into a panic about their health on occasion. It really, really sucks. I've experienced it with pets too, and I can confirm from those experiences that yes, the anxiety and anticipatory grief in a lot of those cases was much worse than when it actually happened.
Wow same thing with me my mom had me when she was in her 40s and is now 60 plus ,she has a lot health problems and procrastinating All the time. I'm pretty scared and don't have the best relationship but still love her and not to mention I her home care aid I'm pretty terrified if something where to happen because just like in the show of bluey grandad I feel like I still need her I'm 22 and will be 23 in March.
@@CSCS20 Wow, I almost forgot I left this comment! I was going down a really bad anxiety spike about my parents' health at the time. Thankfully my mom did end up going to a doctor this year and nothing was terribly wrong, but they wanted her to have a colonoscopy (just a routine check, not because they're suspecting anything) and I'm not sure she's ever going to go through with it. I'm pretty close to your age actually. I'm 21, will be 22 in September of 2024, and my relationship with my mom has also been a little rocky. But I don't know how I would cope if I lost her or my dad. It's a very hard thing to deal with.
Thank you so much for this video share. My wife & I are going into our 70s and one of our sons I believe this will help along our conversations between dad & son. Bless your work good person to me.
The Queen has returned
My dad do this all the time to me.
He's had two mild heart attacks and continues to overdo it.
It's so aggrivating because his health is failing and he refuses to listen to us.
Chilli was so relatable to me in this episode.
I’ve seen bits and pieces of the show with my little sister, and all of it was very wholesome and I enjoyed watching. Of course not every episode of Bluey tackles serious subjects, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but your video has convinced me to watch the show.
And I really relate to the whole “I’m not ready to let them go yet” mentality of Chilli. Not gonna detail it because of how personal the story is, but I felt very similarly not too long ago
How is it going with watching Bluey? Are you enjoying it? What's caught your attention?
I really needed this my grandma is dealing with cancer and I didn't have the words to explain why I'm upset. Thank you
I have a 5 year old sister. My mom's birthday was last weekend, and when I was telling her about it, she was saddened by the news. She asked me if my mom was going to be a grandma, and I told her no, and she instantly cheered up.
One of my grandmothers passed away last year during a visit to us from Mexico. It was the first major death I went through, and we saw her at her worst. My little sister knows she's dead, and I think she's finally understanding what that means. She was also upset about my other grandmother's birthday - she says she doesn't want them to be a grandma, because she doesn't want them to grow old and die.
In my sister's mind, as long as my mom isn't a grandmother, she can't age. I wasn't sure how to explain that idea to her, so I just let her believe my mom would stay our mom forever. I used to experience a lot of dread thinking about my family dying at her age, and while it's a normal thing we all go through, I want to give her some more time to enjoy the years where she thinks my mom will live forever.
Anticipatory grief regarding death has been so prevalent in my life that I just finished my thesis project surrounding that very topic. It's also what makes Grandad such a touching episode for me. It isn't afraid to tackle the idea of anticipatory death, but handles it gently and lets me reminiscence about the good times my family with the final few lines. ❤
Never clocked it as grief but rather dread, ive often felt a feeling of Dread when id think about my family aging. I also get hit the worse when I think about my baby cat, he will be 3 in june but i still think about how much hes changed already.
You coming back with a Bluey video of all things is like some sort of amazing cosmic alignment, so glad you’re here again!
I tend to get waves of this with my mom, I'm only 18, and she's in her early 50s, but we are so incredibly close that once in awhile I get this wave of sadness like what you're describing. Thank you for covering this topic. What happened in "Grandad" is eerily similar to what happened to my grandfather who owns a farm, but that fear hasn't occurred for me like it probably did my parents
I have been feeling this all my life. My dad was 59 when I was born and ever since I was born I can remember people telling me that he may die soon and that won't have him forever. The earliest time I remember crying about this was when I was 7 years old. (I really love my dad and am scared he may pass away. He almost died two times already)
I had this grief when my grandma was slowly dieing from cancer. It was easy to get over her death because I was able to go through the process while she was still alive and it helped me not get depressed when she passed. While she was sick she told me to just live in the moment while she was still alive. My grandma was very independent so much so that one day when my mom and I saw her walking to the bus stop to go to work we noticed she was doing slot of huffing and puffing and was walking slower than usual so we ran up to her and told her to stay home and that we would take her to the doctor.
"No it was yesterday" is just a gut punch
I felt a lot of anticipatory grief while my grandmother was facing dementia. Heck, it was how my anxiety surfaced. When she eventually passed Thanksgiving 2020, I didn’t feel as much grief as I expected because I dealt with a lot of the grief ahead of time. (And it eventually helped because my family got COVID just before she died; we weren’t able to go to the funeral. BUT the funeral home cleared the home the day before to let us say our final goodbyes, which was really nice.)
The other time where I felt a TON of anticipatory grief was when I found out my first dog had liver cancer. For the longest time - 7 MONTHS, I was barely functional - I had to sleep with my mom just so I could sleep without getting an anxiety flare. It was the hardest time of my life so far. Thanks to her, and some extra time with my dog, I was able to get through it. She passed the Friday after Easter 2021. And again, I didn’t feel it as bad as I did through those 7 months. And ever since then, when I worry about my grief or whether or not I could handle it, like when we were picking up her ashes, I could…feel them there. My two dogs’ spirits watching me, as if they’re saying “Everything will be OK.” It was a huge feeling of comfort and solace within such a difficult moment. ❤
So yeah, those are my two cents. Hope whoever is reading this has a good day, and takes care of themselves. This too shall pass. ❤
My dog was recently diagnosed with cancer, and the vet said she only has about a month left, so it’s nice to know there’s a name to what I’m feeling right now, and *of course* it has to come from Bluey (seriously, where was this show when we were younger?).
My mom is dealing with cancer, she’s already gone through a surgery that was supposed to deal with it, but at a follow up appointment we learned that it spread and now she needs a more invasive surgery.
I lost my Grandma to cancer in 2020 so after finally coming to terms with her being taken by it suddenly my mom has it and even though it’s only in the early stages, I’m already experiencing grief for her.
It’s comforting knowing that there’s a name to this feeling, thank you for making this video :)
my dad recently became diagnosed with heart issues and told me he’d had an operation over the phone while I was away for a month in another country. I had to rush to get on an 8 hour bus trip right after that call, and when I arrived to my friends’ home, they chucked on bluey and it happened to be this episode. man, did I start bawling. absolute hysterics. it was a bit comical. when I came back, I put it on with him. it was so much easier to show him grandad than explain the complicated feelings I was struggling with.
Great video! I adore this episode, and deeply appreciate breaking down these themes and feelings like you did!
I remember sobbing when I had to go back home from visiting family in NY because I was afraid I was never going to see my grandmother again. I can't remember why I was worried, she'd been going through cancer treatments for a while, but her health declined and she passed away November of 2016. It's been almost 7 years and I still think about how my gut feeling ended up being correct, how that was the last time I ever saw her. I'm crying as I type this. It still hurts.
I’m honestly glad to see that this is a common thing for people and to see that there’s a word for it. I’ve been having moments when I think about family members and family dogs dying one day. I know that it most likely won’t be until a few years but still I’m gonna miss them when they’re gone. Especially my dog a lot I have never met a dog with such a big personality she’s just like a little kid I love her. She’s healthy and she’s still only 3 going on 4 soon but I still think about when she’s eventually gonna be gone. Times like this really remind me to appreciate what you have now because nothing lasts forever. 💙
Also damn I feel called out with the whole “theory of mind” thing 🥲
I would sometimes have this sudden nightmare moments in my dreams, where someone i cared about is badly hurt, or worse. Its been increasingly distressing as i've been put into such a bad health condition that i can't BE there for my loved ones while they're here... But the moment i saw the thumbnail i automatically figured what the term "anticipatory grief" meant. And it brings me some comfort knowing im not just some idiot worrying about nonsense.
Throwing in my 2 cents, but RUclips reccommended this video to me at probably the perfect time.
I learned about the term "anticipatory grief" throught this video's title alone, and it made me realize I am most likely going through that currently, but not with my parents or grandparents.
Instead, it's with my pet cat. He's a siamese (possibly mix as he doesn't have the elongated muzzle that most siamese have, he looks like a basic domestic cat with the siamese fur color/pattern), and he's named Bandit. I am currently 24, and will be 25 in August, and I've had Bandit ever since I was 10 years old.
I love him so much, as he's been my comfort pet throughout some pretty tough times in my youth. But recently, after I moved out of my parent's house and moved in with essentially my great uncle's house due me getting a new job in the town near where they live, I left my cat behind with my family because both I couldn't bring him due to other animals already being at said house, and because I didn't want him to be confined to only my room.
But recently I've started feeling really stressed about the thought of him possibly passing away due to old age, and the fear of how hard it may hit me overwhelms me when those thoughts cross my mind. But thankfully, this video and the knowledge of what I'm experiencing is helping me understand what I'm feeling and better figure out how to work with it. Thank you.
Having just lost my grandpa because he didn't take care of himself last year, that episode hit horribly hard. After my grandma had passed though, he wasn't the same. I hope he's happy where he is now though.. they loved eachother. My mom and I just.. miss em both.. We do still need him, but.. We're without now, and it's honestly lonely.. if any of you out there have grandkids or kids, please, take extra care of yourself too. They'll need you even if you think they don't sometimes. ❤
I'm a full grown danged adult. I have no grandkids. Bluey is helping me deal with the loss of my mate, I started watching the series inspired by another creator who just randomly did a video about Bluey.
I started watching this particular video as I was a wreck in the months leading up to his death. I reached out a grief support group and they said they don't deal with anticipatory loss. I had a name of what I was going through, but I had no help, as there is not a lot of anything to help you deal with that if you don't have enough money for one on one therapy. I fully didn't and don't, cancer is an expensive beast.
Thanks for making video's about this subject, I've lost two people to cancer and didn't even know the words for the feelings until I got a rejection from the grief center weeks before my husband died. At least having words for what I was going through helped, hopefully this video helps others.
I’ve experienced anticipatory grief a lot in my life but for things such as my childhood, my older sister leaving for college, the end of the days going to specific places that were important to me, no longer enjoying an activity I use to love. I felt grief over all of these things even before I had to stop going to those places or give up that activity. I was so heartbroken before my sister left that I went into her room and cried one night. I thought it was weird and sort of shallow of me to feel upset over loosing things like places and activities, or even objects like my favorite toy. This video is very validating ❤
I never thought of that before. I may have been in this type of grief for most of my life as my mother has been in poor health due to her asthma since I was a child. He had many near death calls at different times in hes life that suddenly remind me that he could die at any moment from an attack whenever I was over or almost over it. She is still alive thankfully, but it has been a fear of mine since I was 5 years old and it gets stronger with each passing year.
The episode “Granddad” hit super close to home for me, not necessarily because I personally have been grieving. The episode reminded me big time of my mom and my grandparents. My mom has been stressed in recent years trying to care for both of her parents. She’s had to help make appointments for many surgeries and we almost thought we were gonna lose my grandpa last year. What doesn’t help is that they tend to not care about their state of health especially my grandma. She loves to hide food that she knows if my mom caught her with they would quickly be confiscated. We sometimes joke that she has to take care of 5 kids (me, my two siblings, and her parents). My dad has also been getting old but just like Mort he doesn’t like admitting it and still tries to do things like lifting heavy things and other activities. This episode hits close to home now more than ever.
Great video Lea! It's truly remarkable how Bluey consistently discusses these kinds of emotions in a way that's caring and gentle enough for the young child target audience, but still accessible and thought-provoking for older audiences.
Wow I didn't know it had a name. From time to time I struggle with the thought of my mom (who is currently 58, and thankfully still strong and well enough) of well not being here anymore. I'm 22 and in my first year of college (I took a two year gap cause of the pandemic) and when I think hard about it I feel like I did waste my time, that maybe I should've gone back to school sooner cause I want to be able to find a job asap, earn and give back to my mom for all the things she's done. Just treat her and take care of her. I had a moment last year where I struggled with the thought real bad that I couldn't relax and I cry almost every night, I was super anxious and couldn't even enjoy the things I'm supposed to be enjoying. I'm kind of alright now, it just comes back sometimes cause of seasonal depression or pms brain. I sometimes struggle with my own mortality too, sometimes I think I'm too old and I don't have much time anymore. Which I know is not true, I'm still young and have great years ahead of me or so I say as affirmations or manifestations. I think the same for my mom hoping that she will still have many years ahead of her and that she will have little to no complications. (I know there's lots of old people who are still alive and kicking at 75+) I don't know it's my way of coping. Death is definitely inevitable, there isn't really something we can do about it but just make the most out of your time together, be kind and just hope for the best. It's alright to grief from time to time but not too much I guess, save it for when they're actually gone, what's the use of their extra time here if you're mourning for them too early. Thank you for this, this was really comforting and validating. It's nice to know a lot of people also go through this and that I'm not alone. And sorry this turned out really long, oh and for those who haven't watched Bluey I highly recommend it! It's cute, colorful, comfy and gives me hope that there's still good people who will raise good kids.
I felt this in three instances so far in my life: the first was when my family's dogs passed away, but it happened when we got a new puppy. I was overwhelmed with the future inevitability that all I could do was cry while our puppy laid her head on my chest, which helped calm me down. The second was when my grandfather had a bad fall, hitting his head on the sidewalk. I was more grief stricken in that moment then when he entered hospice care years later (rest in peace). The third is as I'm writing this, thinking about my parents and how my mom is dealing with these feelings with her parents. I want all of us to live long and healthy lives, but learning to accept yet prolong the inevitable takes time to process. I can only hope my grandparents can live long enough to see their hopefully future great grandkids., but given recent health scares me & my mom worry a lot about them (especially since they live out of state).
My close cousins went through this with their father 5 years ago, who ended up dying young after a surgery had gone wrong. He had a heart attack during recovery while he was gardening, which he wasn't supposed to be doing because of the strain on his heart. But before that happened, it was like they knew he was going to die and the worry and anticipatory grief were overwhelming. That was the hardest funeral I've ever had to attend.
Now, my own father is slowly fading away from a cancerous brain tumor. He lost his independence and can't drive anymore, and can barely speak without several words out of place and slight slurring. We know he won't get better, but my family is trying our best to spend time with him and take care of him. It hasn't really hit me yet how the time for him to pass away is approaching, I think because all my life he's always been in very good health and took very good care of himself. It's hard to imagine this happening to someone like that. And yet, it is. I think it'll really hit me when he can't speak anymore.
I've had to put off watching this for a bit because I felt I wasn't in the right mindset to listen to it. But this resonnates *so much.* I've had this kind of feeling linger in the back of my mind very often, and in a sense, it's comforting to know I'm not alone in this.
I'm glad kids are growing up with Bluey. It breaches topics like this one in a way that lets them learn important life concepts in a safe environnement, or put words on things they've lived through. I'm glad I get to watch Bluey too and find meaning in these moments as well.
Grandad hits really hard for me, Ive been in anticipatory grief for several years now, my parents already being older when they had me and my brother doesnt help.
Had this exact feeling when my grandfather was diagnosed with brain cancer. I knew he didn't have long and would soon become a shell of himself. I also had a very bad fear of losing my grandparents as a child before they were even close. Seeing Chili nag her dad to do what's best for his health while he ignores her hits close to home. My grandfather did the same with my mother before he passed. Getting old sucks and it's something many people fear....
My first time feeling this was when I was only 5 years old when I had a nightmare about losing all my family members. It's nice to know there is FINALLY a term I can call it. I've been struggling with it all my life. The anxiety and dread of losing the people you love can be mental torture sometimes. Thanks for this video 🥺
My dad just had a heart attack last month and watching this last night really hit me hard. Not many cartoons make you feel like crying.
My brother was sick for a years and for long time I had dismissed it as 'he'll get better, don't worry'. By the time I was 14 or so, it really started to dawn on me that he might not get better. I remember overhearing my aunt talk about how my brother was allergic to the newest medicine that was recommended, and it hit me. I just broke down crying while my mother was doing my hair and that caused everyone else to start crying too.
Months passed and my brother did die, and while I was affected, it was a lot easier than I thought it would be. I had gotten tears out there before he actually died so I had already accepted it.
I went through a smaller version last year, when my elderly father caught covid. He's diabetic so it was a lot worse for him than my mother, who recovered quickly. He thankfully got better and came back home, but while he was in the hospital, my sister and I had a serious talk about what would happen if he wasn't ok. I was trying my best to accept that possibility, but I wasn't ready. I'm still not ready to lose my father or my mother.
Whenever I think about these feelings, I wonder if I'm too cynical or cold just accepting that someone is going to die and making peace with it while they're still alive, but at the same time what else am I supposed to do? Hope is wonderful, but it can be so painful.
I’ve dealt with anticipatory grief before but I didn’t know that’s what it was called. My Nana was diagnosed with Parkinson’s when I was in my early teens and when she passed away last year, I didn’t feel as sad as I thought I would because I had already grieved her. I had already lost her to Parkinson’s years before.
This episode hit hard, because I experienced anticipatory grief for almost a decade before my mom passed from cancer treatment complications.
Growing up, even as a little kid, old people gave me such anxiety. Like I was uncomfortable around my grandparents and older relatives because it made me feel afraid to know them and get attached to them, because I knew they would die soon and I didn't know how to reconcile that so it made me afraid.
To this day I don't know why or what brought it on, (maybe the death of my great grandmother when I was 7, who used to babysit me?? I'm not sure,) but i remember the day we knew she was going to die. My parents never told me she had dementia and thats why we didn't go visit her anymore, I just thought we were busy. But anyways, it could be other things, who knows. Luckily I've grown out of it now at least.
Still the later death of my grampa on my dads side makes me worry for my dad as he gets older. Hes starting to look more like my grandfather. And he had to have heart surgery just like my grandfather, although they caught the plaque buildup at a way earlier age. I went to him to the cardiologist appointment, and he's the type to say "just rub some dirt in it, im fine" when really, he needed a triple bypass or he could die any day.
It was really hard to get him to get over his "im invincible" pride and let him let my siblings and I take care of him. He had an attitude after i graduated highschool that he was pretty ready to check out of life after that.
So in the part where Chilli says "He needs to take care of himself because, I still need him..." Hits way too close to home!! 😭😭😭
He's doing better now, but we still worry...
I'm lowkey upset that your videos dont get more views. I find them a lot of fun to watch even when I myself arent a fan of the shows you talk about (EX: Ladybug, Steven Universe, etc)
You have such a good way of linking psychology to cartoons as well, those are my favorite videos to watch.
my grandmother passed away in 2020 from cancer. in the years leading up we had hoped it would get better but it didnt. the grief of knowing you will lose someone is so devastating; to be able to do nothing while they lessen and lessen. anticipatory grief is something i dont wish on anyone.
theres several bluey episodes that remind me of her, grandad included. Flatpack and Copycat are the other two. they do a wonderful job in all three explaining life and how living and growing and learning and passing are all just a part of nature.
Thank you for this. I fear death constantly but mostly my loved ones dying. I’m just so afraid of losing them but also I just don’t want their lives to end bc they deserve it live. It sucks.
Thanks, my mom isn’t old but she has a lot of health problems and doesn’t take care of herself. Thanks for putting into words what I’ve been feeling on and off for the last few years.
Been feeling this for a long time. Thanks for this video.
This really relates when my grandpa got stage 4 cancer 3 years ago that turned into bone cancer and it felt like I was just watching him decay away and the medications made him lose himself as he was dying. I felt horrible and some sort of guilt as I couldn't do anything to stop him getting increasingly worse he passed away in October of 2022. Now my great uncle on my dad's side was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in February of this year that's also spreading as he's starting chemo he's already lost his hair and lost over 100 pounds and getting worse faster than my grandfather had. I'm afraid he won't make it to the end of the year. I wish I didn't have to say this and I feel horrible trying to already except it as it is.
This episode is unexpectedly powerful, and the message just gets more profound and approachable each time you give it a rewatch.
Realizing how much this poor woman had to endure though her entire life is disheartening; her mother's passing, her prolonged conflict with her sister and since it is now confirmed, her miscarriage taking a huge rupture on her life… And it also makes you appreciate her more as a person (or character). Absolutely adored the usage for different perspectives and views, one for each character ranging age parallel to the demography each one represents!
The children's innocence and inability to fully comprehend the occurring situation their family faced, Grandad Mort's constant campaign between his youth slowly but surely vanishing from his grasp and a desire for endurance before his departure and finally, our tenacious gal herself expressing discomfort and fear by the loss of yet another of her beloved family members.
This last one being slightly more complex than the former two as the sole conception of death is terrifying for us ephemeral creatures, the thought of bereavement is distressing for everyone and copeing with is never an easy task to tackle; Chilli is no exception, she had several experiences dealing with this predicament in one way or the other… so her exaggerated reaction is vindicated by the simple thought of losing her father (the only remaining blood related member of her family by the moment (as Brandy's conflict remained)) tormenting her, couldn’t bare with more, it was her last straw and she'd probably break if it occurred.
But by the end, everyone including the viewer realizes there wasn't an adversarial intention on either side, just conflicted misinterpretations from every side; the girls learn that what their mother advices is for their own good and that there are certain aspects not opt to their choice, Mort learns that there is balance between recovering inner youth and being reckless and Chilli learns that it is best to appreciate the present rather than worrying about the future, and living as "it was yesterday".
Truly marvelous review! Just ADORED it!
Thank you for this video. I appreciate it more than you know. Best to you!
Nice to see you come back and talking about Bluey. This show is so cute and adorable.
Nice to see you posting videos here again, Lea 💙
I’m so glad she’s back. Missed her content sm. And with a banger Bluey video too
Welcome back! I'm familiar with these feelings myself, and it's surprising that a show like Bluey would cover it, but I'm happy it does.
Yay! You're back! hope you've been okay and looking forward to what you have in store for us :)
I feel like this a lot with my grandparents and to a lesser extent my mom. I felt this with my cat years before she passed away.
WELCOME BACK MY DUDE
This episode gets to me because my maternal grandparents both died recently (grandpa in late 2021 and grandma early this year) and mom has been sick bad but not gonna die sick and its really hard for my family.
We're seeing this in both my and my husband's families right now - we still have my nana and his dad's parents, but all three of them are slowing down.
When my grandpa died in 2020, it happened in less than a week. We didn't get that period and we didn't get that chance to say goodbye. I still cry every time I think about him. Miss him everyday
Welcome back :D
I didn’t know there was a word to describe it, thank you for bringing it to my attention
1: First
2: YOUR FRICKIN BACK LETS GO!
Great to see another great video of yours, Lea! Keep up the marvelous work! How are you doing today? Hope you're doing well! ^_^
hi im happy your back / still here
*Agent Stone voice* SHE’S BAAAAAACK!!!
Welcome back!!
When my cat sassy was getting old i thought the same things. How i put it was it was a gun pointed at my heart. I was gonna get shot, i didn't know when, and i knew it was gonna hurt. And when she did pass, it hurt, but it also was a weight that was lifted off my shoulders. She was no longer in pain. She can now run, jump, and play like she could when she was young. And tho i miss her, i know she is in my moms lap, taking a well deserved nap
This epsiode confirms one of the things I think about regularly. Did the Ludo team research dog illnesses? They did, and I can explain why Grandad needs to rest!
If he is recovering from Heart Worm, he must of had an injection of melarsomine into the epaxial muscle. The injection goes deep into the muscle, and it STINGS. The epaxial muscle is next to the spinal column.
The drug itself causes the adult heartworms to break apart and be caught in the blood stream until the immune system can break down the parasites.
If dogs DO NOT REST, there is a chance for severe complications.
I think about that with my great grandmother she keeps trying to get us ready by giving us our inheritance
Had to look it up to confirm but yes: heartworm as well as any procedures to treat it take a severe toll on senior dogs.
Toon Ruins upload lets gooooooo
Welcome back! I don’t watch Bluey so I don’t think I will watch the video, but I wanted to give you some of that sweet sweet engagement
She has returned
That animated into is oddly fitting since bandit, the dad, is an archeologist. (Not Chilli's dad, bluey and bingo's dad.)
I'd never seen this before but my kids watch this cartoon. I never knew it had stuff like this in it. Kinda makes me want to take a little better care of myself for their sake
Omg you watch bluey too! I love that show!
How lucky that the mom got the chance to see her parent grow old. I never got that opportunity. My mom died when I was 27.
I have been mourning my moms death since i was 10… she’s still alive but it’ll be so sad when she dies
Welcome back.
From the topic in this video I can relate to not accepting periods of rest. I’m twenty and I had to pull the dead weight of my mom and be more independent and more of a care taker as a kid and being on the autism spectrum.
This has been hitting me since my maternal grandfather passed. It's just that, if you'll pardon me using the kind of language I think about big things with, the Reaper has already crossed one name off of his list, how long until he takes the others? I mean, sure, Papaw had some health issues. He had just beat cancer, but my paternal grandmother is clearly in the process of going blind and while I sincerely hope I'm not being ableist, it's hard to watch. Heck, my dad is in his 50s, and I'm not even truly dating currently, so how long will my hypothetical kids have with him? I remember learning about how, according to Norse mythology, there are magic fruits that extend the lifespan of whoever eats them. At a point, I started wishing they were real. Guess that's just the lot of us mortal humans, though.
Oh cool, I could tell this was kind of a sequel to your Amphibia pets video
AY NICKTENDO WATCHES TOON RUINS
My dad has a bad drinking problem and he is gone thanks to corrosive crystallize liver and stumic ulcers
my parents decided to have me when they were older so my dad is now 70, and i've just become an adult. i think i've had anticipatory grief since i was a kid, though- since i was always aware of their age. not to sure how to deal with it now as they are only getting older (and similar to chillis dad my dad still acts like he is young) and i need to keep worrying about them. it is really nice to know that i'm not insane though.
I love the puting Infinity Train clips where ever possible even if the video isn't Infinity Train
Great video grief sucks
Btw unless heartworm is serious vets usually just give dogs medication and tell owners to not over exert their dogs
I actually didn’t know this was a concept
I lost my mum when I was 18months old, so my gran did a lot of work raising me with dad. Gran died two years ago at 80, where I was about 35. Her health was on the decline, she was diabetic yet refused to stop eating sweet things or to start exercising, needed a pusher to get around and moved around so little that Snails would out pace her. I am also a late diag. autistic gran could never really understand this so there was always fights, between us but never anything major.
As she got within the last yearish, I was being pretty Chilli about it with my nagging which lead to fights her saying I'm trying to upset her and being cruel on purpose and me trying to prove that wasn't the case then she would cry to dad (Who kepts having to get in between the fights) saying how he always takes my side (Yeah in general no) while I'd be video calling my girlfriend in the mean time just balling my eyes out at her about it. So This episode always kills me. Not only that, I'm a massive daddies girl, he's more of a brother than a dad in parenting style and he does go way too far out there sometimes for me to be happy. Which ALSO makes me real Chilli about him too, and there has been simmilar comments between me and dad "Nah, it was yesterday" and it just sends me all over again.
So glad you're back! I had no idea, I didn't realize that I go through anticipatory grief everyday when I look at my cockatiel. Thank you for covering this topic!
I just lost my own cockatiel a few days ago. He got spooked by a wild bird at a window and flew out just as my dad got home from work and opened the door, because the light was off. We heard and sighted him in nearby trees the next morning, but then we lost track of him. Ever since that dusk, we've heard nothing. There's still a chance he's out there-there have been several other runaway cockatiels that hung around my neighbourhood for entire months, but my mind went straight to the worst and I've been going through anticipatory grief for the last couple of days. We had him for fourteen years.
I've had anticipatory grief about my bunny since I adopted him. He's turning 6 now and the more time passes, the more I feel like his death is inevitable.
hey i havent watched the vid yet but may i ask why where u gone for like a year???
I never thought it was an actual thing I was feeling honestly it’s complicated in of itself because my mother was an horrible parent not physically absuive to me or my sister at least can’t say the same my older brother. Is it wrong feel this way for someone how done nothing but manipulate and hurt you and your loved ones