This is What Stops You From Finding Love - Terri Cole
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- Опубликовано: 24 июл 2024
- Do you feel like you date the same wrong person over and over again? Or are you in a relationship and feel like you have the same fight over and over again?
It feels sort of like being trapped in that 1993 movie with Bill Murray, Groundhog Day, where you can't seem to figure out how you got here again (and again and again).
There are so many of you who want to talk about your love blocks and learn about them, which is what I am covering in this video because once you move them out of the way, you can either unlevel your current relationship or stop wasting your time dating the wrong person over and over again.
In this video, I discuss:
● Love Blocks
● Different Types of Attachment Styles
● Understanding Your Love Blueprint
● How Awareness Can Change Your Love Situation
What are love blocks? I've been a relationship expert for 25+ years and what I've observed is that so much of what happens in our love lives has to do with old material - behaviors that we've learned from our family of origin (the family that we grew up in). But this isn't about blaming anyone or making your family wrong, it's just you are the way you are in love and in relationships for a reason.
Without being aware of unresolved or unconscious material, changing unfulfilling patterns can be nearly impossible. But you can intentionally become aware of this material. To pull back the curtain on who you attract romantically and why, we combine your attachment style and your romantic love blueprint.
Download the cheat sheet for this episode at the bottom of the blog post on this page: www.terricole.com/understandi...
TIME STAMPS:
0:00 - Introduction from Terri
1:25 - What are love blocks and where do they come from?
2:48 - Attachment styles and how they influence our love blocks
7:39 - Your love blueprint
15:15 - Questions to figure out your love blueprint
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ABOUT TERRI COLE
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see www.terricole.com/
CONNECT ON SOCIAL
Instagram: terricole.com/ig
FB Page: terricole.com/fb
FB Group: terricole.com/fbg
Podcast: terricole.com/itunes
RESOURCES:
Boundary Boss Book: boundarybossbook.com/
Real Love Revolution is my 12-week course designed to rewire any limiting beliefs about yourself, what you deserve, what you are worth and how lovable you are. If you want to re-write your love story, whether you are single or partnered, this is for you: terricole.com/rlr
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp’s resources. If you choose to sign up for Better Help’s service, I will receive a commission on the referral but please know that I only recommend services that I know & trust.
www.terricole.com/gethelp/ - If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
#terricoleshow #relationshiptips #relationshipgoals 
Развлечения
Thank you Terri. Your personal anecdotes resonate so much with my own life. I'm glad you got to "unpack all that crap" 20 years ago and meet your wonderful husband. I'm nearly 50 and only just doing it now. I've never been married or have had children for fear of being dependent on the wrong man (my father), thus was career driven. However, this video has really opened my mind to potential possibilities. I hope it's not too late. I'd love to find a lovely man now I'm beginning to abandon my blueprint: locked into a cycle of seeking 'unavailable' men.
It is never too late. I am cheering you on for taking the steps to move forward and heal your old cycles. Thank you for being here!!
Great video...i like how she talks abt her private life,so honest and so powerful way to connect on emotional level with public.. She's great..I don't know why she doubt that she would be good mother ..bcz when I listen her voice I almost forgot who my real mother is..she's so encouraging amazing
Thank you!
I love your videos and podcasts. A real eye opener. Thank you Terri Cole
You prolly dont care at all but does anybody know of a trick to log back into an instagram account?
I stupidly forgot the password. I would love any tricks you can give me!
@Solomon Immanuel Instablaster =)
Oh wow! You have just told my own family story! I wish I could have watched this video 10 years ago! Could you talk more about always falling for guys who are far away, different country, different city etc... It’s been. Major pattern in my life and and I have never heard anyone talk about it and here you touched on it.. Thank you for bringing so much clarity into our lives!!
all of your videos have helped me so much. thank you for the wonderful work you do ♡
Thank you for being here with me, Jordan!!
I needed to hear this.
Thanks so much, Terri. I can relate and am happy for you! I am 43, recently broke up with a man who wanted to marry me but was unavailable emotionally (didn’t talk to me for a day or two when emotional issues; was too close to his adult students by sharing personal stuff and constantly invalidated my feelings when I asked to stop being that close to them). He was like my dad. In my childhood, I was my mum’s emotional support and chose friends whom I could play that pattern with. When they healed, our friendship got fizzled out. I have a great career etc. i have now 2 friends and am grateful to them. Awareness helps and hopefully, I’d pick wiser next time as I’d love to find my person who is emotionally mature or rather mature enough to have a chat instead of shutting down. Thanks again.
Love from Hungary
Suzie
Thank you so much for sharing your insights, Suzie ❤️
Phenomenal content 🌻💓
So glad you enjoy it!
I’m fearful avoidant which is the combo of anxious preoccupied and dismissive avoidant 😅 bEstOfBOthWoRlDs
love this! thank you:)
What would you classify someone who builds feelings then becomes worried about what the other person thinks about how they are behaving. It limits my ability to communicate. Truthfully I fall into multiple of your other categories. That is just the major one that shuts me down, makes me overthink, and just keeps me from speaking to my spouse.
It may be helpful to look into attachment styles to see if there is some insight there that helps. Start with the book Attached by Amir Levine.
Your background is EXACTLY mine!
Thank you!!!
Hi Terri, I'm new here and I've been binge watching your episodes, please make a video on how to cope in a marriage with an avoidant attachment when you're still dealing with your anxiety attachment style
Hey there- thank you for watching ❤️ Attachment styles aren't directly in my wheelhouse, but you might enjoy these interviews I did:
ruclips.net/video/7nfBqg5kFyA/видео.html - Healthier Love Attachments with Silvy Khoucasian
ruclips.net/video/XA0ASqtZ5Ic/видео.html - How to Soothe an Anxious Heart, with Rikki Cloos
I have some unpacking to do!
I'm witnessing your courage for starting to unpack!
Master class I would like it how do I do this Terri xxxx
I want to unpack my crap...
i have avoiding type of attachment and i dont know if i can change or if i can resist that fear of intimicy where someone special come into my life
Just curious to know how you've got on with this?
Yes!
Omg! My school counselor was so wrong about me she said that I need to marry a guy that's a father figure but my dad was not there for me at all! And to tell u the truth I feel sorry for him now cus his health is pretty bad right now! :(
Yeah hopefully every generation parents better, Creator, Good Force knows!
What would you say to someone who does not remember? Bits and pieces I do (not good) but how does one heal if they can't really remember :/
Kim,
whatever you do remember will help. Many people have very limited memories. Your mind may be protecting you. Start journaling and see what comes up. You know enough right now to change what is blocking you in love. Just start to work on it (watch more educational videos, read books, get into therapy etc) xo
Terri Cole, I appreciate you taking the time to reply. Thank you, this is helpful and I am hopeful. I've been reading a lot of how our brains protect us, makes sense. I stopped journaling about 3 years ago, so yes I will start again. Again, THANK YOU! I hope you have one of your best days.
I felt emotionally abused. My mom is a narcissist. I understand so many of my fears now.
Im witnessing you with compassion Carlita. Thank you for sharing.
I have anxious avoidant
You are not alone!
I swing between anxious and avoidant attachment styles, depending on the partner. Relationships are hell to me, hence having been single for 10 years at age 37. I desperately want to sort this out.
I'm witnessing you with compassion and holding space for you. Change is possible and you CAN have healthy love. I've worked with many people just like you in my courses, you are not alone. If you're looking for how to start, my Crushing Codependency course starts this week and you can still sign up here: www.terricole.com/cc
Are you from Saratoga Springs?
what if your all 3 of these tpes
My home was just like yours but no alcohol and lots of fights. Im single no kids 48 years old.
Zwhere is the cheat sheet
I do I remove my love block
✨✨🙏
Terri are you ok you sound like you have a sort throat?