Hi Chloe. I'm a new subscriber, I have undiagnosed adult Dyspraxia, ADHD, Dyscalculia and Auditory Processing Disorder. From a male perspective I really take female Neurodiversity for granted. Great video, really informative. Watching from London. 👍
I love when NTs say "Oh my god, people with autism are so mean and unempathetic, I need heeelp" like are you listening to yourself, ma'am? You want US to be nice to you but this is how you treat autistic people?
For real i remember in 4th grade we were supposed to have a talent show and i showed a “friend” the choreography i wanted to present and then she showed it at the group of “friends” and Said it was hers. And ofc i Said no it’s mine and then it was a huge scandal there like they believed her and i was made to look like a fool didn’t even got into the talent show
nd (adhd) but not autistic and i have a lot of autistic friends in the nd community AND ALL OF THEM ARE THE SWEETEST HUMAN BEINGS EVER OMG where does the unempathetic stereotype come from?
@@jessepinkmansimp6090 My guess is that it’s because we struggle to understand social cues, and because of that we can be ignorant to how someone is feeling because we don’t see the signs of whatever emotion they’re feeling (for me I struggle recognizing irritation. I never realized when I was pissing someone off as a kid, and now I always assume people are mad at me when they aren’t). It’s not because we don’t have empathy, but rather because we just don’t recognize the cues.
I am truly sorry that you have been treated poorly by some NTs in your history. Okay, so, generalising... What I would like to clarify, is that not all NTs are the same, and I feel that you are doing the same thing to NTs that you actually dislike, which is: not finding out about the actual independent person (rather making presumptions *and* retaliating to all NTs, even those who actually are aware of and have an understanding of AA people, because they have some in their lives). This is unjust, and while I *see AAs*, and often adjust my behaviour for their benefit, i am not given the same respect in the recognition that I am a unique individual, of whom you are making presumptions, and I struggle with that. The response you have seems to be: "I don't care if you are black or white or big or small, or the same race as me, or gender diverse or not, BUT if you are NT you are all tarred with the same brush because you do not understand me." I am sorry to say this feels somewhat hypocritical of the values which you purport to uphold. I am unsure how else to view this. It appears to be totally an *us and them* thing and to my mind is unjust. Please understand, I am trying to get my head around this, as it is does not seem as straightforward to me as many people with Autism seem to think it is.
7:45 - HELLO I FEEL CALLED OUT RIGHT NOW this is exactly why I'm wondering if I'm also ADHD as well as autistic all along! It's like my autistic brain wants to set a schedule, and then my ADHD brain immediately refuses to follow it xD
I'm going through a bad time, being bullied by one girl in my friend group and just wanting to be normal, but you helped me see , what is normal? Everyone has their own normal and that's okay. Thanks Chloe`
Normal is a weird thing. In dutch i always say "normaal is een relatief consept wat voor iedereen anders is". Im not sure about the precise english translation ans i don't trust google on this one but it basicly means that normal is differant for every group of people and every individual person. If it's normal for me to sit on the ground even if there is a chair/bence a few meters away (because no chair in the world has more space) then that is okay. If eating something like pesto may on a crossant is normal for you and others think it's discusting then that is okay. As long as you don't hurt anyone then do it:). If it's a thing that is harming in any way, shape or form then maybe get help for it. I can't stop picking my cuticle's so im currently getting help for that:).
@@orangesnowflake3769 whilst I’m sorry if you are experiencing that, that doesn’t make your situation more valid or worse than (in respect to the comment “at least”) this persons. Let’s hope her other friends in the friendship group don’t agree with the behaviours of the other girl, because if they do and say or do nothing that can be to some people more hurtful than having no friends altogether, i.e. fake friends, ones you can do without.
@@orangesnowflake3769 why does it make everyone feel worse? That’s not my intent. It’s not my intent to make anyone feel “bad” about anything just to bring awareness to the fact that peoples circumstances are different, but yet that doesn’t mean we can assume one is having it easier etc than another necessarily, it is subjective and relative to an individual. I’m just trying to highlight that whilst the situation your experiencing is not nice, it’s also not nice to assume that because this person states they have friends or says they are “only” being bullied by one person, that that doesn’t make her situation any less valid, or any worse or any better - we also don’t know the full context either. Nor is it anyones place to judge that. Your comment, wether intentional or not could have to the poster “down played” her experiences as though they should just be grateful they “don’t have it so bad”. It becomes a “who has it worse” kind of situation and that to me isn’t helpful, not to mention how the poster may have felt or anyone else experiencing similar, in reading that. People shouldn’t just be grateful they’re being bullied in any way or sense, regardless. You don’t just accept something because someone else may have it different or subjectively, “worse”. I’m sorry both of you are experiencing what you say you are and so, if anything, I would hope you could empathise with one another in some ways - even if your circumstances are different.
@@orangesnowflake3769 why do you think I am coming at you or policing you? I am not, I am pointing out (as you have just pointed out how you perceived my comment), a different perspective. I don’t want nor think either that you should keep things to yourself or that other people should too - which is why I commented what I did. It might not help your situation, but did your comment help this persons? (I am not saying this to make you feel guilty, but to consider what you posted and how that may make someone else feel) There are many people in yours/the posters situation, neither is okay. I’m not having “a go” at you - you can post of course but you too should think about how you may say things on here and how it could possibly effect other people also (because as you also point out - it affects people). Thats not being fake, it is being considerate. If you didn’t mean it the way it came across, then fair enough. I am not judging you, I am giving a different perspective. My intent is not to offend you or make you feel any worse. It’s not for either of us, or anyone to make a judgement on what is so-called “worse”, nor is it necessary. That’s the whole point of what I commented.
I love the “hate balloons” one! My best friend and I tried to start a band, because our shared special interest was music. Our first song was “ I hate balloons at birthday parties” about our hatred of balloons.😂🤦♂️
6:00 worst thing ever: a classroom projector making that weird electronic whine that no one else can hear. I discovered that I can partially block it out, while still hearing the teacher, if I push down those little cartilage flaps on the front of my ears, but that also makes the air conditioner sound louder. you just can't win.
Omg. See for me I have tinnitus so no matter what I do I have a beeping/whooshing sound in my ear. Umm so that’s fun (I’ve always had it, like it’s in my family)
My mom when I was a kid: Well, I know she has sensory issues and doesn’t understand social cues and has high anxiety, but we’ve already had her diagnosed with ADHD and she’s super empathetic, so I *know* she’s not autistic! Also my mom, at random intervals in my life: Oh yeah, she’s almost always humming or singing to herself, because she’s so into music and musicals! And she walks on her toes all the time bc she’s been doing gymnastics since she was like four! Me getting older and realizing that many, MANY traits are shared between people with various neurodivergent diagnoses and that “lack of empathy” is not at all a characteristic of all autistic people, especially when she was referring to me having high affective empathy specifically: 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
I haven’t finished the video yet so I don’t know if the online test was like this or not but when I went to get an OFFICIAL adhd diagnosis they made me fill out an online form (along with all of the standard in person stuff) and the questions were completely based off of stereotypes (for reference the form was very clearly made for parents to respond to about their child but I, the child, was made to do it), most of which generally were “does your child seem odd” and “are many habits your child has and things they often do weird” and “are they a disruption to those around them”. Needless to say it was extremely triggering to fill out and I broke down a grand total of four times over the course of that seven pages form, but the main thing was that I was genuinely so surprised to see a professional be so ableist
My experience was similar, they had me take an online test that was very stereotypical, and I was surprised because my doctors son is on the spectrum as well. And every mental health professional I’ve talked to lately puts so much weight on functioning labels 😭 it distresses me so much like I get that’s what y’all are being told to do but listen to our community we’re the ones that know ourselves
Hi! I am Bridie. I have been diagnosed with autism, adhd, Spd, and anxiety since I think 2016 when I was 6 turning seven. You have helped me not be scared to embrace my autism ever since I started following you. (My mum got me to watch your videos and have loved your content ever since) I am a 11 year old girl who loves rapping, horse riding (I have been doing it as therapy since the end of 2018), poetry, true crime and cats. You have made me learn so much about what it means to be autistic and why it’s not a bad thing! You have helped so many other girls like me and just wanted to say thank you! Lots of love, Bridie 😊
Chloe, oh my god (in the best way, no worries.) So I discovered your videos when I had just been diagnosed and I had that "I have no idea what this means and what to do now" moment and let me just say: just the act of seeing an autistic woman that wasn't the stereotype that these tests and quizzes presented was such a huge eye-opener for me. I literally sat there and thought "her autism presents like mine does!" which seems like such a small thing, but when you've just been given this heavy word and are hesitant about accepting it, seeing someone who is autistic the same way you are autistic made a world of difference in how quickly I began to accept myself as I am. That's why I wasn't super surprised when our pie charts looked so similar! I mean, there were a few areas that were a bit more or a bit less, but overall very similar. But what was the most eye-opening for me was that we had almost the exact same reactions to a lot of these questions (especially the empathy question), which allowed me to see just how much male autistic stereotypes are still prevalent in how we test for autism. I assumed that tests like the Autism Quotient were a monolith that could not be questioned, but you made me realize that even experts in autism are still just guessing because it's such an individualized, spectrum disorder that can be hard to understand when viewing it through a completely neurotypical lens. Anyway, I know this comment is long and rambling, but I just wanted to let you know how much it means to me just to see a person out there in the world, proud of their autism, advocating for positive change, and being so unapologetically themselves. So... keep doing that :) PS: There is an autism headcanon going around on the Internet that Rapunzel from Tangled (my favorite of all the princesses) is autistic and since you're since a big Disney person I was wondering if you had an opinion on this? Also, I think an adult version of "your child has been diagnosed, what now?" video would be an amazing addition to the channel, but absolutely no pressure. But it was exactly the kind of video I was looking for when RUclips led me to your channel. Sorry this turned into a wall of text, but if "oversharing/over-explaining" were on the pie chart, mine would have broken the testing software.
hi chloe!! so glad to see another video, and i’m getting an official diagnosis for adhd and possibly autism on thursday, thank you so much for all your help on my diagnosis journey!
Congrats i hope that you don’t have autism it’s a really hard thing to deal with i have family and friends with it and one of them is non verbal so she gets bullied a lot and I have adhd it makes things so hard to focus with but teachers are a lil bit more calm with u and u can get help with more things
@@anymousleopardgecko3994 I dont think it makes ppl feel better to hear that somebody hopes they dont have autism. Getting a negative diagnosis when u relate to the autistic experience or have autistic traits can be invalidating and confusing, especially if it was a misjudgment by the practitioner (sometimes it is). I don't think it is ever relief
So I'm watching the video, and right away, I feel like this could be a really useful tool for those trying to figure out a self-diagnosis? I know it's quite a controversial subject, but for many folks who cannot access routes to getting a formal diagnosis, a self-dx can be very valid especially if you've dug so deep into it and really thoroughly researched it. So knowing what tools are actually out there that are actually helpful, rather than questionnaires that are based on stereotypes and myths, could be really helpful! Also, isn't it funny how autism traits differ? In terms of loud noises, we're similar in that I love concerts and hate fireworks, however I also *adore* thunderstorms! I couldn't quite tell you why, and I totally get why yourself and others would hate them ^_^
With raining cats and dogs, I wonder if it's not that we take metaphors literally per se, but that our brains are more open to possibilities that neurotypical people have already written off. So case in point, I'm still pretty annoyed about the laws of physics because there HAS to be a way for me to jump and start flying 😂
Also it's just fun to dive down the where did that metaphor come from tangent and whatever just got derailed so I could google that probably was boring anyway
Most of the autistic traits I don’t have seem to be related to ADHD. I got my autism diagnosis last year but still working on figuring out ADHD. When it comes to seeking new experiences and sensory input and my emotions I seem to be the opposite of what most people associate with autism
13:25 I’ve found that I do the same when upset, never do I yell or get angry unless I’ve already exhausted all of my tears and been sad about the situation for a long while. Every time I get upset I just go silent and cry, I feel TRAPPED inside my head like moving and using any energy to talk is almost impossible. I just curl up and cry completely silently, sometimes I can’t even bring myself to respond and it makes situations a lot worse, people think I am giving them the silent treatment or throwing a tantrum. No, I’m just devastated and paralyzed. It’s horrible
I am fascinated with where my spectrum overlaps with other autistic people and where it doesn't. My sons who is also autistic doesn't like loud noises etc like Chloe where as I seemingly live for loudness lol, thunder, fireworks, loud music I find energizing. I struggle with groups or crowds or being noticed by strangers. Glad people are beginning to understand we are not all like Rainman
I was late diagnosed at 27 so I definitely had to learn via like parents yelling at what I was doing wrong or when ppl would seem embarrassed by me or weirded out And id just slowly adjust and ended up with a HEAVY mask Im working to remove along with many other issues that stemmed from masking and not knowing what was wrong for years. Few years before even that diagnosis I got Adhd and ptsd ect so its all just a mess now. But eye contact; I normally just look at their eyebrows or ears at eye level so they think im looking. Because EVERYONE growing up would scream “LOOK ME IN THE EYES--“ blah blah. Got good at faking it. And as for movies its so easy compared annnd eyes are BEAUTIFUL unless attached to a human directly in front of me and then I panic and wanna just nahhh
I took talking to people at the office the same as to friends as more like not filtering--there being things you can safely say among friends that might get you in trouble at the office. Or it could be the intense interest thing. I have a tendency to bring conversations around to whatever my major focus is, whoever I'm talking to.
The thing you said about schedule... crazu stuff, I believe that's explains a huge part of my struggles in life: I need a schedule and a routine to function normally aka have normal brain function, maintain healthy levels of anxiety and stress, be able to process & digest my world and emotions, but at the same time my incredible lack of executive functioning and impulsive behaviours from ADHD makes me unable to follow any shcedule. I feel this is the main reason that my life is such a huge chaos and why most of my life has felt like a house of cards
Kristin Bell has spoken a lot about her need to repeat things...basically when she watches a movie she repeats all the dialogue softly to herself, but gets herself in trouble irl becaue if she hears an accept she just HAS to repeat it, and she describes liking the way the words feel in her mouth...basically it sounds like she'd describing echolalia. She's also extremely sensitive and cries at the mention of sloths, which might be a special interest? I wonder if she has any other ND traits
Regarding eye contact, i can't hold eye contact when I'm speaking, when listening it's slightly easier, especially if they aren't making eye contact while speaking as well
On the subject of "robotic" voices -- most of the time when i talk i am incredibly animated (similarly to the way you speak), but other times my tone makes me sound like i'm pissed off. i haven't pinned that to anything specific, but now i'm wondering if it's because of overstimulation or something else going on at the time! something to think about.
When I was looking into autism before I was diagnosed (which was this year) I felt so insecure and had major imposter syndrome. But having content like yours and many other autistic creators made me feel so valid. Although every online test even though while taking it I was like “this ain’t me I must be something else” all of them were like *hello super autism alert* so you must understand my confusion 🙂
Now i think i understand why i would think way too much about metaphors and analyze them or analyze them when someone says the metaphor wrong. I cant really think of anything besides "I couldn't care less" but most people say "I could care less". Then its really confusing to me and then like when i was younger i didn't know which was the correct one i would ask "why are you saying that you could care less, so you care?"
About the idiom thing: When I was little I thought rabbits and rats laid eggs. Because the Easter bunny hides Easter eggs around the house so I thought he was just laying them all over the place but come to think of it that still doesn’t make much sense because the Easter bunny is a boy. I know cause I totally got a letter from him, he also has the exact same hand writing as my grandfather. And as for rats I’d heard the phrase rats nest and thought “birds have nests because birds lay eggs. Therefore rats lay eggs” and I neglected the fact that mammals also can have nests. Cause after that I thought the phrase “rats nest” was just idiomatic but then I learned rats actually do build nests!
I’ve always talked in a way that people consider “condescending” when in actuality I’m just talking to you like an equal but for some reason that offends people😑😑 like okay miss girl
I can relate to so many of these less stereotypical traits, being alone, repeating fun sounds, tiptoe walking, enjoying overwhelming sounds like loud music only when I am mentally prepared, decision making, always told I was overly stiff with my posture, and the issues with speaking volume and how often, mostly being quiet until there's an interesting subject. Assessment isn't very accessible though in rural Australia, or for more financially strained households, so all I can do is get informed. Love your channel so much, I have learnt a lot
Yep your explanation of your eye contact difficulties is basically exactly the same as me. Eyes = good, looking at eyes when they’re looking at me = bad. Looking at eyes while I’m talking also = bad.
You’re not Narnia!?!? Well now my dreams have been dashed. Also, I just want to thank you for putting yourself out there and being yourself! I adore watching your videos and I love your flower crowns!! I wish that testing was easily available to everyone. I was diagnosed when I was 29 and everything about my life finally made sense. These questions are all over the place. I would not trust them for a proper diagnosis at all which makes it all so much more of a struggle. Being Autistic is so much more than a couple of questions can figure out. Also I had no idea the fear of balloons popping was an Autistic thing. I learn new things everyday! I hate balloons popping and when I was a kid we would sometimes have games where you were supposed to pop the balloon and everyone was so excited and I was dying inside. Not only did I not want the other kids to pop their balloons but there was no way in hell I was going to pop MY balloon. Makes me shudder to even think about it. I like to stand with my back to a corner or wall because of my PTSD. Sneak up on me and die 🤷🏻♀️
17:48 I watch the whole entire video without realising it was that quiz you were doing, I did it's a couple of weeks ago when I saw someone posted about it on tiktok and I actually find it quite accurate to see a nice little circle with my traits
I al older than you, we are quite a lot different, but I relate so much with your videos. Thanks for the great content. This really help plenty of people out there
When you said I am horrendous at maths in your intro I could relate. I'm autistic and I am so bad at maths. I have always been way worse at maths than my neurotypical peers. I am famous throughout the lands for being bad at maths.
My results were quite similar to yours, aggression and depression very low, social difficulty somewhere in the middle, maybe because I'd learned masking, but still have difficulty, and then noise sensitivity, posture and fidgets were highest
I’ve known I have ADHD for awhile now; I have wondered about being on the autism spectrum before, but haven’t ever spent a lot of time looking into it. This video has been very eye opening. It’s really hard when you think you have yourself “figured out” and have finally found explanations for the things you always thought were “wrong” with you- but there are just some things that ADHD doesn’t cover. So, like I said- this video has been EXTREMELY eye opening… thank you so so so much. ❤
Honestly, I like these tests. My therapist used the RAADS-R first just to see if it had any indication of Autism before proceeding. Nailed it. 😂 I went on to give the test to my kids, their scores were like mine. (No surprise, after I learned I could be autistic.) I was beginning to think the test just gave high numbers until I made my husband take the test. His score was less than 1/4 of mine. 😂 We aren't questioning if he needs to be evaluated. Definitely not diagnostic but I think it's a good screening tool if you think you may be on the Spectrum.
Chloe, this is interesting because although I am not Autistic, I have a few of these things, but not everything. I have some anxiety, so I do not like busy traffic, drums, fireworks, thunderstorms, or fire alarms. I will also add I do not like cannons. My Boyfriend holds on to me every 4th of July because in America that is our Independence Day and lots of fireworks are going off. Although I really do not like the intense sounds of the fireworks, I keep telling myself, how pretty they are and that is how I cope, but also with my Boyfriend holding me:)! As for the cannons, my Boyfriend used to do American Civil War Re-enactments and I would have to use ear plugs because the sound of the cannons blasting is so intense, I feel like someone is punching me in the chest. Over time with other less intense sounds, I live in an Apartment and I have learned to not let things like most noises bother me. However, Oh, I wanted to add that I so LOVE ASMR sounds which I find comforting and I also like the calming sounds of an air conditioner:)!!! I do not know if ASMR sounds could be useful to anyone, but I just wanted to add that suggestion:)!! And I also tend to walk on the balls of my feet when I am not wearing my walking shoes since I was a little child. And I have trouble with Tones in that I have trouble hearing whether I am talking too softly and people have complained. Since my Mom now has trouble hearing, I now speak up, but I am bad with tones. Maybe because I was diagnosed with learning disabilities. And I prefer familiar things, but I also like to try and embrace new things:)!! I like a balance of doing some things by myself and other things with my Boyfriend or my Mom:)!! And Chloe, I so LOVE your flower dress with your flower crown:)!! You are so pretty:)!! And I was wondering, is that green and white plush in back of you is a Squishmallow? It is very cute:)!! Thank you for sharing:)!!
When I was getting tested for autism my psychiatrist told me to take this test by Dr. Simon Baron Cohen who is actually Sacha Baron Cohens cousin I found the same test online by him and I took it cause I get impatient cause it's like going through my head like Do I have autism? Do I have autism? Do I have autism? Driving me bloody crazy but its pretty bloody accurate aye. It gives you a score out of 50 and you then gotta send the results of what you answered for each question to your doctor and he tells you the rest. So if you're going to take a test online I'd suggest that one
Thank you Chloe for articulating this stuff. How are you supposed to be assessed when you are a person who has both? I have an ADHD Dx, but also have a number of traits that seem autistic, however, at 55 I have had a LOT of practise at behaving in ways that are expected. I spent some years as a little kid doing calisthenics and being on the stage. I learned to smile when performing, and to behave in ways that I was supposed to. Very often I feel that this is what I am still doing, without even realising. :/ BTW: You mentioned that you don't understand how to feel happy for people, but then you said that you feel so much empathy for people that you can cry when they are happy, and cry when they are sad (so what I consider overwhelming feelings). I take that as feeling happy for someone.
I’m better alone but because of my anxiety and probably something else I get really scared of new places and I don’t understand the expectations a place have so I need guidance and help however I also thrive on my own if I manage my expectations and plan a lot!
hello there, I am autistic as well, but I also really feel like I also have ADHD, I'm worried about how to get one, do I say im autistic first and if i do get the test and its reveled I do have ADHD, will they say I never really had autism
Eye contact isn't painful for me.... But as a kid when I learned about cultures that viewed it as rude I thought that sounded nice. I had to take speech classes or something... Not really a class... More like was pulled out of class to talk to a speech therapist at school.... Because I talked too fast.... And Chloe kinda talks really fast too... Especially when excited or happy.
you don’t speak like a robot, but you do have a special way of speaking. You speak very very fast and have a lot of tones actually (idk if it makes any sense)
I am self diagnosed autistic adhd after a year of Research and by talking to and watching autistic and adhd creators on YT tik tok Instagram at first i was like”can’t be on the spectrum i have good eye contact” my therapist after the first day i entered her office(started the process of official diagnosis)”u make terrible eye contact” go hom ask my mom”u never made eye contact when lookin at ppl” also me “don’t Take shit literal” yet we have a phrase in my country”don’t sing cuz it will rain” when someone sings terrible and i used to continue to sing as a kid bcuz i was like”Wow it will rain and i’ma be like Elsa controlling the weather” I actually do like a good party.Like i wouldn’t be able to party every single night but a few good parties a year it’s damn amazing. Love concerts too like to me loud music has always blocked all other sensory imputs bcuz one of my special interests is music and whenever there is a party or somewhere with music played i’d most likely focus on the music and not pay attention to other stuff
could u do the Autism-Spectrum Quotient test and talk about it please? because I've seen that it's the most close to a accurate test about autism in adults
omgs yes! I was so excited and confused the first few times I heard "It's raining cats and dogs." and I kept looking out the window, I was so bad with sarcasm and lies etc./ I was just so gullible as a child, and I Always have to walk on stairs with my toes or front feet, I hate when the edge touches the arches or middle bit.
This is super interesting, I recognise almost everything you talk about here, in myself. Diagnosed add and asd two months ago (is it only two months??), and I don't doubt the add, but wasn't prepared to learn I'm autistic as well, and this feels validating, haha. Especially the part about going someplace on my own and just hanging around, with myself, for a while is something I really enjoy, and travelling alone too! One of my best travelling experiences was going to London for a few days, on my own, and just doing whatever I felt like doing. It was great.
I took the test for fun and my depression thing was high, everything else low. I have depression and anxiety and my psychologist suspects ADHD as well.
Why do doctors and psychologists miss basic pointers such as difficulty with eye contact? Instead of assuming I'm lying or being deceptive, how about thinking maybe I have Autism, and at least looking a bit deeper, pardon the pun.
I remember in college I talked to this dude who was probably autistic and he was making like INTENSE eye contact with me and I felt like “Dude, we don’t need to pretend like we’re neurotypical here and this is a natural thing for us. You’re among friends!”
Thankyou so much Chloe I can relate to you very much and you have helped me realize a lot of the things I am bullied for are autistic traits that I can’t change because I simply don’t understand it
I relate to you so much the sport thing is so relatable to me : I’m bad a group sport or very coordinated stuff but I love going to the gym and horse riding ! I have bad posture (painful) and I used to walk on my tiptoes (still do when going up the stairs) but I have to say my noise sensitivity is very fluctuating
Ima an example of some one whose autistic and I’m decent at eye contact. It’s a whole spectrum some autistic people can or can’t do eye contact and some do to much. I personally most of the time do “perfectly”. Except with certain people or certain situations or emotions or if I’m overstimulated. So please to people who think people who are autistic can’t do eye contact, some of us can. Some of us can’t welcome ASD(Autism spectrum disorder).
I’m going to my psychologist soon and am going to bring up that I think I may be autistic. Any one have any tips on how I should go about that? This is something I’m really nervous of...
maybe use online "autism checklists" and write down what makes you think that you might be autistic? it is incredibly hard to remember them all and i made multiple experiences (with regular doctors about physical health problems, but still haha) that if i can't give to many examples for thing x they are gonna dismiss it nearly immediately. with this physical list you take with you, you can talk in depth about everything on there, maybe make little notes with examples or thoughts too
Re the raining cats and dogs thing: once I asked a friend if he wanted to get ice cream after dinner, he said “twist my arm” and I actually started to twist his arm. It was awkward. I was 22 🙈
I’m not an autistic person and I don’t give people eye contact sometimes I don’t know why people think that’s a main relation to an autistic person. 🤷♀️
Yooo I just wanted to say that I feel so happy and at peace now, because I just got my official autism diagnosis yesterday 😅😪🙌 and found out that I have ADHD as well which I did not really expect 😂😂😅
I used to love balloons. Mostly cause when I was little I think I categorized them as animate in my head so they were my friends and I would become very sad when they popped or flew away and I would keep them until they died several weeks later.
I think the tests can be a good first step, I got 4 people to do it for me (about me) which helped me decide if I should head down the expensive route of further testing. Please post a link to the test you used and I’d like to see more tests - It would be nice if they targeted people a bit better - Like are your male/female, age bracket, etc.
I always have fun we these tests. I am autistic but I am also highly extraverted and had a good childhood and no depression or anxiety so I wind up failing most of them. 11:08 - this was really big for me. I would go up to anyone and treat them like they were my best friend regardless of how well I know them or how they feel about me. This doesn't have to do with masking 11:30 I do actually lack empathy. not that I don't care about others or want them to be happy but my emotional state is totally unaffected by other people's emotional state. It is funny how this is a stereotype though because I appear to be the exception to this rather than the norm. 12:10 - yes
Thunder doesn't really bother me, but, that VERY loud thunder that can shake a house... that noise freaks me out. Don't those lights that give off that loud buzzing/humming sounds. But, in my town they don't test adults for autism (they said used to but the place that did, stopped doing it for some reason). If any adult in my area wanted to ever get diagnosed, they'd have to drive at least 2 hours for it.
I would give anything to be professionally tested but because of my eyesight and my dyslexia and not being able to read or write makes it very difficult if not impossible that I cannot be tested professionally because I have to be able to read the test I have to be able to write my answers down and I have to be able to see blocks or whatever else they want me to visually look at and give my assessment on and I am fortunately I’m stuck with self diagnosing unless something can be arranged where I can get tested just by having somebody read everything to me as well as someone to write down answers of what I say because I am unable to read and write and I have been diagnosed with dyslexia years ago when I went and got tested on my own I graduated grade school with an F I went to the school for the blind here in Indianapolis Indiana graduate a deer with a C and half a point away from feeling and the principal called me a gold brick her the whole time I’ll because I was not being able to get the help that I needed that I was promised through my caseworker as a foster child she even made it clear to the school that I would need tutors and that those would be provided as what she understood so did I never got that though I just kept falling between the cracks even as a foster kid I’m still falling between the cracks and I don’t like it and it hurts and I was finally adopted by my foster parents want all my major medical was done with it just still hurts though that everybody used to call me lazy and a gold breaker and not understanding me or listening
I find a good way to avoid the problems of eye contact is to frown and look away. That looks like you are thinking deeply about what is being said, which I usually am!
That’s totally me at parties! “You go do the thing and the socials and I’m gonna grab a beer and go dissociate in the corner. Maybe take a nap when the beer hits.”
I'm currently in another state going to school for my CDL and I hate it. I want to be home (hopefully tomorrow after my test I'll be going home) this place scares me. Oddly enough I was expressing this to my fiancee just a few minutes ago
When i was young (>8) i would walk on my toes cause since i was about 2 i looked at my cat’s feet and realised how they have evolved to walk on their toes and their heel is like halfway up their leg. i used to love dressing up and mimicking my cats so i would always do that even when i was at school cause i was thinking of cats. I do it now out of habit and also because i have always been fascinated by evolution and curious as to why we have evolved the way we have
I just want to say I like when people talk fast! I get bored and disinterested otherwise. I watch your videos an 1.25 and most other youtubers at 1.75.
7:34, I hate fire alarms, and the sound of recorders, the sound of recorders make me wanna cry, and my music teacher back when I was still in elementary school, made us learn to do the recorder, at first I was excited, until started playing it, then iI started to hate it, so I was brought back to my classroom so the teachers could calm me down, my school had to give me noise canceling headphones for the recorders, and also for when there was fire drills, they would warn me (but not anyone else since they knew what types of sounds bother me, and give me the noise canceling headphones
I've been paying a whole lot more attention to exactly how I make eye contact recently. I know that I don't make direct contact, I look at basically every other part of their face, except the eyes. You started talking about how you like eyes and how you like looking at eyes, but not making eye contact. I'm the same way. Even in this video, trying to look at your eyes. I'm good until you look into the camera, then we're basically making eye contact and I'll look away. Oh but yes, big eyes super focused on the screen. Rufus Scrimgeour in the opening for the 7th Harry Potter movie comes to mind immediately.
From one horse girl to another, how do you feel about western or Aussie saddles? For me, they make me feel claustrophobic even tho I was originally taught in one. Not sure if that's related to autism or not, but it came to my mind during the test
Thank you NordVPN for sponsoring this video! You can try out Nord here: nordvpn.com/chloehayden
💛🌻
I love you chloe
@@werbnaright5012 I’m not taking money
Luv you Chloe thanks for helping us ♥️♥️
Hi Chloe. I'm a new subscriber, I have undiagnosed adult Dyspraxia, ADHD, Dyscalculia and Auditory Processing Disorder. From a male perspective I really take female Neurodiversity for granted. Great video, really informative. Watching from London. 👍
Same with most autistic men and just most Autistic people in general.
I love when NTs say "Oh my god, people with autism are so mean and unempathetic, I need heeelp" like are you listening to yourself, ma'am? You want US to be nice to you but this is how you treat autistic people?
For real i remember in 4th grade we were supposed to have a talent show and i showed a “friend” the choreography i wanted to present and then she showed it at the group of “friends” and Said it was hers. And ofc i Said no it’s mine and then it was a huge scandal there like they believed her and i was made to look like a fool didn’t even got into the talent show
Really sucks how people don’t even try to understand us. We tend to struggle with social cues and they just assume we can’t empathize at all.
nd (adhd) but not autistic and i have a lot of autistic friends in the nd community AND ALL OF THEM ARE THE SWEETEST HUMAN BEINGS EVER OMG where does the unempathetic stereotype come from?
@@jessepinkmansimp6090
My guess is that it’s because we struggle to understand social cues, and because of that we can be ignorant to how someone is feeling because we don’t see the signs of whatever emotion they’re feeling (for me I struggle recognizing irritation. I never realized when I was pissing someone off as a kid, and now I always assume people are mad at me when they aren’t). It’s not because we don’t have empathy, but rather because we just don’t recognize the cues.
I am truly sorry that you have been treated poorly by some NTs in your history.
Okay, so, generalising...
What I would like to clarify, is that not all NTs are the same, and I feel that you are doing the same thing to NTs that you actually dislike, which is: not finding out about the actual independent person (rather making presumptions *and* retaliating to all NTs, even those who actually are aware of and have an understanding of AA people, because they have some in their lives). This is unjust, and while I *see AAs*, and often adjust my behaviour for their benefit, i am not given the same respect in the recognition that I am a unique individual, of whom you are making presumptions, and I struggle with that.
The response you have seems to be: "I don't care if you are black or white or big or small, or the same race as me, or gender diverse or not, BUT if you are NT you are all tarred with the same brush because you do not understand me."
I am sorry to say this feels somewhat hypocritical of the values which you purport to uphold.
I am unsure how else to view this.
It appears to be totally an *us and them* thing and to my mind is unjust.
Please understand, I am trying to get my head around this, as it is does not seem as straightforward to me as many people with Autism seem to think it is.
Chloé is wearing the flower crown I made for her SQUEEEE 🌻✨
IT LOOKS SO COOL
That’s amazing! Congrats! ❤
I love it! You did a great job
I have a serious question, do you vocalize the word "squeeee" because I will say Eeeeeeee when I get excited
7:45 - HELLO I FEEL CALLED OUT RIGHT NOW this is exactly why I'm wondering if I'm also ADHD as well as autistic all along! It's like my autistic brain wants to set a schedule, and then my ADHD brain immediately refuses to follow it xD
I'm going through a bad time, being bullied by one girl in my friend group and just wanting to be normal, but you helped me see , what is normal? Everyone has their own normal and that's okay. Thanks Chloe`
@@orangesnowflake3769 If you ever need to talk to someone - I get what you are going through :)
Normal is a weird thing. In dutch i always say "normaal is een relatief consept wat voor iedereen anders is". Im not sure about the precise english translation ans i don't trust google on this one but it basicly means that normal is differant for every group of people and every individual person. If it's normal for me to sit on the ground even if there is a chair/bence a few meters away (because no chair in the world has more space) then that is okay. If eating something like pesto may on a crossant is normal for you and others think it's discusting then that is okay. As long as you don't hurt anyone then do it:). If it's a thing that is harming in any way, shape or form then maybe get help for it. I can't stop picking my cuticle's so im currently getting help for that:).
@@orangesnowflake3769 whilst I’m sorry if you are experiencing that, that doesn’t make your situation more valid or worse than (in respect to the comment “at least”) this persons.
Let’s hope her other friends in the friendship group don’t agree with the behaviours of the other girl, because if they do and say or do nothing that can be to some people more hurtful than having no friends altogether, i.e. fake friends, ones you can do without.
@@orangesnowflake3769 why does it make everyone feel worse? That’s not my intent. It’s not my intent to make anyone feel “bad” about anything just to bring awareness to the fact that peoples circumstances are different, but yet that doesn’t mean we can assume one is having it easier etc than another necessarily, it is subjective and relative to an individual.
I’m just trying to highlight that whilst the situation your experiencing is not nice, it’s also not nice to assume that because this person states they have friends or says they are “only” being bullied by one person, that that doesn’t make her situation any less valid, or any worse or any better - we also don’t know the full context either. Nor is it anyones place to judge that.
Your comment, wether intentional or not could have to the poster “down played” her experiences as though they should just be grateful they “don’t have it so bad”.
It becomes a “who has it worse” kind of situation and that to me isn’t helpful, not to mention how the poster may have felt or anyone else experiencing similar, in reading that.
People shouldn’t just be grateful they’re being bullied in any way or sense, regardless. You don’t just accept something because someone else may have it different or subjectively, “worse”.
I’m sorry both of you are experiencing what you say you are and so, if anything, I would hope you could empathise with one another in some ways - even if your circumstances are different.
@@orangesnowflake3769 why do you think I am coming at you or policing you?
I am not, I am pointing out (as you have just pointed out how you perceived my comment), a different perspective.
I don’t want nor think either that you should keep things to yourself or that other people should too - which is why I commented what I did.
It might not help your situation, but did your comment help this persons? (I am not saying this to make you feel guilty, but to consider what you posted and how that may make someone else feel) There are many people in yours/the posters situation, neither is okay.
I’m not having “a go” at you - you can post of course but you too should think about how you may say things on here and how it could possibly effect other people also (because as you also point out - it affects people). Thats not being fake, it is being considerate. If you didn’t mean it the way it came across, then fair enough.
I am not judging you, I am giving a different perspective. My intent is not to offend you or make you feel any worse.
It’s not for either of us, or anyone to make a judgement on what is so-called “worse”, nor is it necessary. That’s the whole point of what I commented.
“Because I am tremendous at math and don’t have a hyperfixation on trains”
Relatable
I love the “hate balloons” one! My best friend and I tried to start a band, because our shared special interest was music. Our first song was “ I hate balloons at birthday parties” about our hatred of balloons.😂🤦♂️
6:00 worst thing ever: a classroom projector making that weird electronic whine that no one else can hear.
I discovered that I can partially block it out, while still hearing the teacher, if I push down those little cartilage flaps on the front of my ears, but that also makes the air conditioner sound louder. you just can't win.
Wait, the rest of the class didn't hear that!?!? When I was in school, I just tolerated it because I thought we were all hearing it!!😑😑😑
in one class only I and one other person could hear it
Omg. See for me I have tinnitus so no matter what I do I have a beeping/whooshing sound in my ear. Umm so that’s fun (I’ve always had it, like it’s in my family)
My mom when I was a kid: Well, I know she has sensory issues and doesn’t understand social cues and has high anxiety, but we’ve already had her diagnosed with ADHD and she’s super empathetic, so I *know* she’s not autistic!
Also my mom, at random intervals in my life: Oh yeah, she’s almost always humming or singing to herself, because she’s so into music and musicals! And she walks on her toes all the time bc she’s been doing gymnastics since she was like four!
Me getting older and realizing that many, MANY traits are shared between people with various neurodivergent diagnoses and that “lack of empathy” is not at all a characteristic of all autistic people, especially when she was referring to me having high affective empathy specifically: 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
I haven’t finished the video yet so I don’t know if the online test was like this or not but when I went to get an OFFICIAL adhd diagnosis they made me fill out an online form (along with all of the standard in person stuff) and the questions were completely based off of stereotypes (for reference the form was very clearly made for parents to respond to about their child but I, the child, was made to do it), most of which generally were “does your child seem odd” and “are many habits your child has and things they often do weird” and “are they a disruption to those around them”. Needless to say it was extremely triggering to fill out and I broke down a grand total of four times over the course of that seven pages form, but the main thing was that I was genuinely so surprised to see a professional be so ableist
My experience was similar, they had me take an online test that was very stereotypical, and I was surprised because my doctors son is on the spectrum as well. And every mental health professional I’ve talked to lately puts so much weight on functioning labels 😭 it distresses me so much like I get that’s what y’all are being told to do but listen to our community we’re the ones that know ourselves
Hi! I am Bridie. I have been diagnosed with autism, adhd, Spd, and anxiety since I think 2016 when I was 6 turning seven. You have helped me not be scared to embrace my autism ever since I started following you. (My mum got me to watch your videos and have loved your content ever since) I am a 11 year old girl who loves rapping, horse riding (I have been doing it as therapy since the end of 2018), poetry, true crime and cats. You have made me learn so much about what it means to be autistic and why it’s not a bad thing! You have helped so many other girls like me and just wanted to say thank you!
Lots of love,
Bridie
😊
They think we can't look at eyeballs in the movies? Lord.🙄
Lighting: (flashes)
Me: yes!
Thunder: (...BOOOOOOOOOM)
Me: YEEEEESSSSS!
Chloe, oh my god (in the best way, no worries.) So I discovered your videos when I had just been diagnosed and I had that "I have no idea what this means and what to do now" moment and let me just say: just the act of seeing an autistic woman that wasn't the stereotype that these tests and quizzes presented was such a huge eye-opener for me. I literally sat there and thought "her autism presents like mine does!" which seems like such a small thing, but when you've just been given this heavy word and are hesitant about accepting it, seeing someone who is autistic the same way you are autistic made a world of difference in how quickly I began to accept myself as I am. That's why I wasn't super surprised when our pie charts looked so similar! I mean, there were a few areas that were a bit more or a bit less, but overall very similar. But what was the most eye-opening for me was that we had almost the exact same reactions to a lot of these questions (especially the empathy question), which allowed me to see just how much male autistic stereotypes are still prevalent in how we test for autism. I assumed that tests like the Autism Quotient were a monolith that could not be questioned, but you made me realize that even experts in autism are still just guessing because it's such an individualized, spectrum disorder that can be hard to understand when viewing it through a completely neurotypical lens. Anyway, I know this comment is long and rambling, but I just wanted to let you know how much it means to me just to see a person out there in the world, proud of their autism, advocating for positive change, and being so unapologetically themselves. So... keep doing that :) PS: There is an autism headcanon going around on the Internet that Rapunzel from Tangled (my favorite of all the princesses) is autistic and since you're since a big Disney person I was wondering if you had an opinion on this? Also, I think an adult version of "your child has been diagnosed, what now?" video would be an amazing addition to the channel, but absolutely no pressure. But it was exactly the kind of video I was looking for when RUclips led me to your channel. Sorry this turned into a wall of text, but if "oversharing/over-explaining" were on the pie chart, mine would have broken the testing software.
“Just because I’m autistic doesn’t mean I’m afraid of ballons!”
“I mean, I am afraid of ballons.”
“But it’s not because I’m autistic”
Nice reference
Whats the reference
@@Sorullo123 men in black 3, i believe. It’s also just a meme at this point lol
hi chloe!! so glad to see another video, and i’m getting an official diagnosis for adhd and possibly autism on thursday, thank you so much for all your help on my diagnosis journey!
Congratulations! I hope everything goes well
Congrats i hope that you don’t have autism it’s a really hard thing to deal with i have family and friends with it and one of them is non verbal so she gets bullied a lot and I have adhd it makes things so hard to focus with but teachers are a lil bit more calm with u and u can get help with more things
@@anymousleopardgecko3994 I dont think it makes ppl feel better to hear that somebody hopes they dont have autism. Getting a negative diagnosis when u relate to the autistic experience or have autistic traits can be invalidating and confusing, especially if it was a misjudgment by the practitioner (sometimes it is). I don't think it is ever relief
So I'm watching the video, and right away, I feel like this could be a really useful tool for those trying to figure out a self-diagnosis? I know it's quite a controversial subject, but for many folks who cannot access routes to getting a formal diagnosis, a self-dx can be very valid especially if you've dug so deep into it and really thoroughly researched it. So knowing what tools are actually out there that are actually helpful, rather than questionnaires that are based on stereotypes and myths, could be really helpful!
Also, isn't it funny how autism traits differ? In terms of loud noises, we're similar in that I love concerts and hate fireworks, however I also *adore* thunderstorms! I couldn't quite tell you why, and I totally get why yourself and others would hate them ^_^
With raining cats and dogs, I wonder if it's not that we take metaphors literally per se, but that our brains are more open to possibilities that neurotypical people have already written off. So case in point, I'm still pretty annoyed about the laws of physics because there HAS to be a way for me to jump and start flying 😂
Also it's just fun to dive down the where did that metaphor come from tangent and whatever just got derailed so I could google that probably was boring anyway
Most of the autistic traits I don’t have seem to be related to ADHD. I got my autism diagnosis last year but still working on figuring out ADHD. When it comes to seeking new experiences and sensory input and my emotions I seem to be the opposite of what most people associate with autism
13:25 I’ve found that I do the same when upset, never do I yell or get angry unless I’ve already exhausted all of my tears and been sad about the situation for a long while. Every time I get upset I just go silent and cry, I feel TRAPPED inside my head like moving and using any energy to talk is almost impossible. I just curl up and cry completely silently, sometimes I can’t even bring myself to respond and it makes situations a lot worse, people think I am giving them the silent treatment or throwing a tantrum. No, I’m just devastated and paralyzed. It’s horrible
Hi Chloè How are You! ❤️ I know that you are a directioner so are you excited that the 11th anniversary is in 7 days!! 💙💚🇨🇮💛❤️
I am also a directioner!
@@logann-mackenziefroste563 Yess I love my fellow directioners!! 💙💚🇨🇮💛❤️
I am fascinated with where my spectrum overlaps with other autistic people and where it doesn't. My sons who is also autistic doesn't like loud noises etc like Chloe where as I seemingly live for loudness lol, thunder, fireworks, loud music I find energizing. I struggle with groups or crowds or being noticed by strangers.
Glad people are beginning to understand we are not all like Rainman
I was late diagnosed at 27 so I definitely had to learn via like parents yelling at what I was doing wrong or when ppl would seem embarrassed by me or weirded out And id just slowly adjust and ended up with a HEAVY mask Im working to remove along with many other issues that stemmed from masking and not knowing what was wrong for years. Few years before even that diagnosis I got Adhd and ptsd ect so its all just a mess now. But eye contact; I normally just look at their eyebrows or ears at eye level so they think im looking. Because EVERYONE growing up would scream “LOOK ME IN THE EYES--“ blah blah. Got good at faking it. And as for movies its so easy compared annnd eyes are BEAUTIFUL unless attached to a human directly in front of me and then I panic and wanna just nahhh
I took talking to people at the office the same as to friends as more like not filtering--there being things you can safely say among friends that might get you in trouble at the office. Or it could be the intense interest thing. I have a tendency to bring conversations around to whatever my major focus is, whoever I'm talking to.
The thing you said about schedule... crazu stuff, I believe that's explains a huge part of my struggles in life: I need a schedule and a routine to function normally aka have normal brain function, maintain healthy levels of anxiety and stress, be able to process & digest my world and emotions, but at the same time my incredible lack of executive functioning and impulsive behaviours from ADHD makes me unable to follow any shcedule. I feel this is the main reason that my life is such a huge chaos and why most of my life has felt like a house of cards
Kristin Bell has spoken a lot about her need to repeat things...basically when she watches a movie she repeats all the dialogue softly to herself, but gets herself in trouble irl becaue if she hears an accept she just HAS to repeat it, and she describes liking the way the words feel in her mouth...basically it sounds like she'd describing echolalia. She's also extremely sensitive and cries at the mention of sloths, which might be a special interest? I wonder if she has any other ND traits
I'm pretty sure she has talked about having ADHD before!
i think she has adhd! (i’m secretly hoping she does because i do too and she’s my fav celeb)
wow I had not heard of any of this but it's so cool and makes kinda sense for what I've seen of her and how much I kinda feel connected to her.
Regarding eye contact, i can't hold eye contact when I'm speaking, when listening it's slightly easier, especially if they aren't making eye contact while speaking as well
On the subject of "robotic" voices -- most of the time when i talk i am incredibly animated (similarly to the way you speak), but other times my tone makes me sound like i'm pissed off. i haven't pinned that to anything specific, but now i'm wondering if it's because of overstimulation or something else going on at the time! something to think about.
I almost threw a coinstar machine after someone dumped a bunch of coins in and it kept making noise forever. Omg
When I was looking into autism before I was diagnosed (which was this year) I felt so insecure and had major imposter syndrome. But having content like yours and many other autistic creators made me feel so valid. Although every online test even though while taking it I was like “this ain’t me I must be something else” all of them were like *hello super autism alert* so you must understand my confusion 🙂
Now i think i understand why i would think way too much about metaphors and analyze them or analyze them when someone says the metaphor wrong. I cant really think of anything besides "I couldn't care less" but most people say "I could care less". Then its really confusing to me and then like when i was younger i didn't know which was the correct one i would ask "why are you saying that you could care less, so you care?"
My mom said clean as a whistle I’m like whistles aren’t clean people spit in them
About the idiom thing: When I was little I thought rabbits and rats laid eggs. Because the Easter bunny hides Easter eggs around the house so I thought he was just laying them all over the place but come to think of it that still doesn’t make much sense because the Easter bunny is a boy. I know cause I totally got a letter from him, he also has the exact same hand writing as my grandfather. And as for rats I’d heard the phrase rats nest and thought “birds have nests because birds lay eggs. Therefore rats lay eggs” and I neglected the fact that mammals also can have nests. Cause after that I thought the phrase “rats nest” was just idiomatic but then I learned rats actually do build nests!
I’ve always talked in a way that people consider “condescending” when in actuality I’m just talking to you like an equal but for some reason that offends people😑😑 like okay miss girl
I can relate to so many of these less stereotypical traits, being alone, repeating fun sounds, tiptoe walking, enjoying overwhelming sounds like loud music only when I am mentally prepared, decision making, always told I was overly stiff with my posture, and the issues with speaking volume and how often, mostly being quiet until there's an interesting subject.
Assessment isn't very accessible though in rural Australia, or for more financially strained households, so all I can do is get informed.
Love your channel so much, I have learnt a lot
Yep your explanation of your eye contact difficulties is basically exactly the same as me. Eyes = good, looking at eyes when they’re looking at me = bad. Looking at eyes while I’m talking also = bad.
omg planning is one of my favorite things, probably in special interest territory
I hate how relatable this is😭
omg same!
You’re not Narnia!?!? Well now my dreams have been dashed. Also, I just want to thank you for putting yourself out there and being yourself! I adore watching your videos and I love your flower crowns!!
I wish that testing was easily available to everyone. I was diagnosed when I was 29 and everything about my life finally made sense.
These questions are all over the place. I would not trust them for a proper diagnosis at all which makes it all so much more of a struggle. Being Autistic is so much more than a couple of questions can figure out.
Also I had no idea the fear of balloons popping was an Autistic thing. I learn new things everyday! I hate balloons popping and when I was a kid we would sometimes have games where you were supposed to pop the balloon and everyone was so excited and I was dying inside. Not only did I not want the other kids to pop their balloons but there was no way in hell I was going to pop MY balloon. Makes me shudder to even think about it.
I like to stand with my back to a corner or wall because of my PTSD. Sneak up on me and die 🤷🏻♀️
Other people: tips and tricks to slow down the vid!
Me: *watches on 1.5x speed to stay engaged*
17:48 I watch the whole entire video without realising it was that quiz you were doing, I did it's a couple of weeks ago when I saw someone posted about it on tiktok and I actually find it quite accurate to see a nice little circle with my traits
I al older than you, we are quite a lot different, but I relate so much with your videos. Thanks for the great content. This really help plenty of people out there
I wish it were more accessible to be evaluated professionally.
When you said I am horrendous at maths in your intro I could relate. I'm autistic and I am so bad at maths. I have always been way worse at maths than my neurotypical peers. I am famous throughout the lands for being bad at maths.
Same I have to do 3 lots of maths some days to try and get me to pass my exams but it just stresses me out
My results were quite similar to yours, aggression and depression very low, social difficulty somewhere in the middle, maybe because I'd learned masking, but still have difficulty, and then noise sensitivity, posture and fidgets were highest
My adhd likes your fast speaking it helps keep me interested .
I’ve known I have ADHD for awhile now; I have wondered about being on the autism spectrum before, but haven’t ever spent a lot of time looking into it. This video has been very eye opening. It’s really hard when you think you have yourself “figured out” and have finally found explanations for the things you always thought were “wrong” with you- but there are just some things that ADHD doesn’t cover. So, like I said- this video has been EXTREMELY eye opening… thank you so so so much. ❤
Honestly, I like these tests. My therapist used the RAADS-R first just to see if it had any indication of Autism before proceeding. Nailed it. 😂 I went on to give the test to my kids, their scores were like mine. (No surprise, after I learned I could be autistic.) I was beginning to think the test just gave high numbers until I made my husband take the test. His score was less than 1/4 of mine. 😂 We aren't questioning if he needs to be evaluated. Definitely not diagnostic but I think it's a good screening tool if you think you may be on the Spectrum.
Chloe, this is interesting because although I am not Autistic, I have a few of these things, but not everything. I have some anxiety, so I do not like busy traffic, drums, fireworks, thunderstorms, or fire alarms. I will also add I do not like cannons. My Boyfriend holds on to me every 4th of July because in America that is our Independence Day and lots of fireworks are going off. Although I really do not like the intense sounds of the fireworks, I keep telling myself, how pretty they are and that is how I cope, but also with my Boyfriend holding me:)! As for the cannons, my Boyfriend used to do American Civil War Re-enactments and I would have to use ear plugs because the sound of the cannons blasting is so intense, I feel like someone is punching me in the chest. Over time with other less intense sounds, I live in an Apartment and I have learned to not let things like most noises bother me. However, Oh, I wanted to add that I so LOVE ASMR sounds which I find comforting and I also like the calming sounds of an air conditioner:)!!! I do not know if ASMR sounds could be useful to anyone, but I just wanted to add that suggestion:)!! And I also tend to walk on the balls of my feet when I am not wearing my walking shoes since I was a little child. And I have trouble with Tones in that I have trouble hearing whether I am talking too softly and people have complained. Since my Mom now has trouble hearing, I now speak up, but I am bad with tones. Maybe because I was diagnosed with learning disabilities. And I prefer familiar things, but I also like to try and embrace new things:)!! I like a balance of doing some things by myself and other things with my Boyfriend or my Mom:)!! And Chloe, I so LOVE your flower dress with your flower crown:)!! You are so pretty:)!! And I was wondering, is that green and white plush in back of you is a Squishmallow? It is very cute:)!! Thank you for sharing:)!!
I am exactly the same with eye contact! I was thinking recently it’s funny because I will look at people’s eyes but then when they look at me I die
When I was getting tested for autism my psychiatrist told me to take this test by Dr. Simon Baron Cohen who is actually Sacha Baron Cohens cousin I found the same test online by him and I took it cause I get impatient cause it's like going through my head like Do I have autism? Do I have autism? Do I have autism? Driving me bloody crazy but its pretty bloody accurate aye. It gives you a score out of 50 and you then gotta send the results of what you answered for each question to your doctor and he tells you the rest. So if you're going to take a test online I'd suggest that one
Thank you Chloe for articulating this stuff. How are you supposed to be assessed when you are a person who has both? I have an ADHD Dx, but also have a number of traits that seem autistic, however, at 55 I have had a LOT of practise at behaving in ways that are expected. I spent some years as a little kid doing calisthenics and being on the stage. I learned to smile when performing, and to behave in ways that I was supposed to. Very often I feel that this is what I am still doing, without even realising. :/
BTW: You mentioned that you don't understand how to feel happy for people, but then you said that you feel so much empathy for people that you can cry when they are happy, and cry when they are sad (so what I consider overwhelming feelings). I take that as feeling happy for someone.
I’m better alone but because of my anxiety and probably something else I get really scared of new places and I don’t understand the expectations a place have so I need guidance and help however I also thrive on my own if I manage my expectations and plan a lot!
I love the way you talk in your videos. It makes me feel more upbeat and happy.
hello there, I am autistic as well, but I also really feel like I also have ADHD, I'm worried about how to get one, do I say im autistic first and if i do get the test and its reveled I do have ADHD, will they say I never really had autism
Eye contact isn't painful for me.... But as a kid when I learned about cultures that viewed it as rude I thought that sounded nice.
I had to take speech classes or something... Not really a class... More like was pulled out of class to talk to a speech therapist at school.... Because I talked too fast.... And Chloe kinda talks really fast too... Especially when excited or happy.
I felt this video on a whole other level. Being both autistic and having ADHD. A whole nightmare. Its great but it's also really fucking stressful.
you don’t speak like a robot, but you do have a special way of speaking. You speak very very fast and have a lot of tones actually (idk if it makes any sense)
I am self diagnosed autistic adhd after a year of Research and by talking to and watching autistic and adhd creators on YT tik tok Instagram at first i was like”can’t be on the spectrum i have good eye contact” my therapist after the first day i entered her office(started the process of official diagnosis)”u make terrible eye contact” go hom ask my mom”u never made eye contact when lookin at ppl” also me “don’t Take shit literal” yet we have a phrase in my country”don’t sing cuz it will rain” when someone sings terrible and i used to continue to sing as a kid bcuz i was like”Wow it will rain and i’ma be like Elsa controlling the weather”
I actually do like a good party.Like i wouldn’t be able to party every single night but a few good parties a year it’s damn amazing. Love concerts too like to me loud music has always blocked all other sensory imputs bcuz one of my special interests is music and whenever there is a party or somewhere with music played i’d most likely focus on the music and not pay attention to other stuff
could u do the Autism-Spectrum Quotient test and talk about it please? because I've seen that it's the most close to a accurate test about autism in adults
omgs yes! I was so excited and confused the first few times I heard "It's raining cats and dogs." and I kept looking out the window, I was so bad with sarcasm and lies etc./ I was just so gullible as a child, and I Always have to walk on stairs with my toes or front feet, I hate when the edge touches the arches or middle bit.
This is super interesting, I recognise almost everything you talk about here, in myself. Diagnosed add and asd two months ago (is it only two months??), and I don't doubt the add, but wasn't prepared to learn I'm autistic as well, and this feels validating, haha. Especially the part about going someplace on my own and just hanging around, with myself, for a while is something I really enjoy, and travelling alone too! One of my best travelling experiences was going to London for a few days, on my own, and just doing whatever I felt like doing. It was great.
I took the test for fun and my depression thing was high, everything else low. I have depression and anxiety and my psychologist suspects ADHD as well.
Why do doctors and psychologists miss basic pointers such as difficulty with eye contact? Instead of assuming I'm lying or being deceptive, how about thinking maybe I have Autism, and at least looking a bit deeper, pardon the pun.
I remember in college I talked to this dude who was probably autistic and he was making like INTENSE eye contact with me and I felt like “Dude, we don’t need to pretend like we’re neurotypical here and this is a natural thing for us. You’re among friends!”
Thankyou so much Chloe I can relate to you very much and you have helped me realize a lot of the things I am bullied for are autistic traits that I can’t change because I simply don’t understand it
I have the monotone voice a lot of the time 😂 people think I’m being sarcastic when I’m not lol
Thank you! I was given your name from someone on twitter and your video has seriously helped.
I relate to you so much the sport thing is so relatable to me : I’m bad a group sport or very coordinated stuff but I love going to the gym and horse riding ! I have bad posture (painful) and I used to walk on my tiptoes (still do when going up the stairs) but I have to say my noise sensitivity is very fluctuating
I don’t like vacuums either!!
Ima an example of some one whose autistic and I’m decent at eye contact. It’s a whole spectrum some autistic people can or can’t do eye contact and some do to much. I personally most of the time do “perfectly”. Except with certain people or certain situations or emotions or if I’m overstimulated. So please to people who think people who are autistic can’t do eye contact, some of us can. Some of us can’t welcome ASD(Autism spectrum disorder).
I’m going to my psychologist soon and am going to bring up that I think I may be autistic. Any one have any tips on how I should go about that? This is something I’m really nervous of...
maybe use online "autism checklists" and write down what makes you think that you might be autistic? it is incredibly hard to remember them all and i made multiple experiences (with regular doctors about physical health problems, but still haha) that if i can't give to many examples for thing x they are gonna dismiss it nearly immediately.
with this physical list you take with you, you can talk in depth about everything on there, maybe make little notes with examples or thoughts too
@@anticherries thank you so much, that’ll probably help a lot
Re the raining cats and dogs thing: once I asked a friend if he wanted to get ice cream after dinner, he said “twist my arm” and I actually started to twist his arm. It was awkward. I was 22 🙈
Yep! I love looking at eyes, just not eyes looking at me.
I’m not an autistic person and I don’t give people eye contact sometimes I don’t know why people think that’s a main relation to an autistic person. 🤷♀️
I hate it when the fire alarm goes off in school
Yooo I just wanted to say that I feel so happy and at peace now, because I just got my official autism diagnosis yesterday 😅😪🙌 and found out that I have ADHD as well which I did not really expect 😂😂😅
I really want to watch but I’m also autistic and are completely sensory sensitive wish I could watch but too much
I used to love balloons. Mostly cause when I was little I think I categorized them as animate in my head so they were my friends and I would become very sad when they popped or flew away and I would keep them until they died several weeks later.
I have noise canceling headphones that i take everywhere too. Mine are colorful leopard print.
I think the tests can be a good first step, I got 4 people to do it for me (about me) which helped me decide if I should head down the expensive route of further testing. Please post a link to the test you used and I’d like to see more tests - It would be nice if they targeted people a bit better - Like are your male/female, age bracket, etc.
I always have fun we these tests. I am autistic but I am also highly extraverted and had a good childhood and no depression or anxiety so I wind up failing most of them.
11:08 - this was really big for me. I would go up to anyone and treat them like they were my best friend regardless of how well I know them or how they feel about me. This doesn't have to do with masking
11:30 I do actually lack empathy. not that I don't care about others or want them to be happy but my emotional state is totally unaffected by other people's emotional state. It is funny how this is a stereotype though because I appear to be the exception to this rather than the norm.
12:10 - yes
Thunder doesn't really bother me, but, that VERY loud thunder that can shake a house... that noise freaks me out. Don't those lights that give off that loud buzzing/humming sounds.
But, in my town they don't test adults for autism (they said used to but the place that did, stopped doing it for some reason). If any adult in my area wanted to ever get diagnosed, they'd have to drive at least 2 hours for it.
This yellow fit is doing so much for you. I love yellow too
I would give anything to be professionally tested but because of my eyesight and my dyslexia and not being able to read or write makes it very difficult if not impossible that I cannot be tested professionally because I have to be able to read the test I have to be able to write my answers down and I have to be able to see blocks or whatever else they want me to visually look at and give my assessment on and I am fortunately I’m stuck with self diagnosing unless something can be arranged where I can get tested just by having somebody read everything to me as well as someone to write down answers of what I say because I am unable to read and write and I have been diagnosed with dyslexia years ago when I went and got tested on my own I graduated grade school with an F I went to the school for the blind here in Indianapolis Indiana graduate a deer with a C and half a point away from feeling and the principal called me a gold brick her the whole time I’ll because I was not being able to get the help that I needed that I was promised through my caseworker as a foster child she even made it clear to the school that I would need tutors and that those would be provided as what she understood so did I never got that though I just kept falling between the cracks even as a foster kid I’m still falling between the cracks and I don’t like it and it hurts and I was finally adopted by my foster parents want all my major medical was done with it just still hurts though that everybody used to call me lazy and a gold breaker and not understanding me or listening
Knowing the situation before in it ❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️yes
I find a good way to avoid the problems of eye contact is to frown and look away. That looks like you are thinking deeply about what is being said, which I usually am!
That’s totally me at parties! “You go do the thing and the socials and I’m gonna grab a beer and go dissociate in the corner. Maybe take a nap when the beer hits.”
This really resonated with me.
I'm currently in another state going to school for my CDL and I hate it. I want to be home (hopefully tomorrow after my test I'll be going home) this place scares me. Oddly enough I was expressing this to my fiancee just a few minutes ago
how an autistic person deals with creating art, for example a surrealist painting ou a poem
im the thunder and firework and alarm one but thats just cuz my ears are sensitive for a dif reason
When i was young (>8) i would walk on my toes cause since i was about 2 i looked at my cat’s feet and realised how they have evolved to walk on their toes and their heel is like halfway up their leg. i used to love dressing up and mimicking my cats so i would always do that even when i was at school cause i was thinking of cats. I do it now out of habit and also because i have always been fascinated by evolution and curious as to why we have evolved the way we have
I just want to say I like when people talk fast! I get bored and disinterested otherwise. I watch your videos an 1.25 and most other youtubers at 1.75.
I was selectively mute my whole kindergarten year, walked on my toes until I was in my late 20s. God, I really wish I had been evaluated as a child.
Good video. Continue on your road on getting the silver play button along with interviewing with Chris ULMER of SBSK
0:35 "are they just based"
7:34, I hate fire alarms, and the sound of recorders, the sound of recorders make me wanna cry, and my music teacher back when I was still in elementary school, made us learn to do the recorder, at first I was excited, until started playing it, then iI started to hate it, so I was brought back to my classroom so the teachers could calm me down, my school had to give me noise canceling headphones for the recorders, and also for when there was fire drills, they would warn me (but not anyone else since they knew what types of sounds bother me, and give me the noise canceling headphones
I've been paying a whole lot more attention to exactly how I make eye contact recently. I know that I don't make direct contact, I look at basically every other part of their face, except the eyes.
You started talking about how you like eyes and how you like looking at eyes, but not making eye contact. I'm the same way. Even in this video, trying to look at your eyes. I'm good until you look into the camera, then we're basically making eye contact and I'll look away.
Oh but yes, big eyes super focused on the screen. Rufus Scrimgeour in the opening for the 7th Harry Potter movie comes to mind immediately.
"I talk to my friends at parties the same way I talk to my coworkers" me who has never been to a party or had a job bcs autism 👁👄👁
From one horse girl to another, how do you feel about western or Aussie saddles? For me, they make me feel claustrophobic even tho I was originally taught in one. Not sure if that's related to autism or not, but it came to my mind during the test