I’ve been struggling with the hookup culture recently, not because I partake, but it seems like everyone around me has such a casual outlook on sex in general whether it’s people i know, communities or society in general and it’s been really hard keeping faith that I’ll find someone who feels the same way as I do and treats sex like it should be, an intimate and special experience. This video made me feel better about it so thank you!
Maybe it is more needle in the haystack to meet someone that doesn't want to rush into sex, and values it enough to save it for only a committed relationship. We're out there.
I just started myself - at least with computer science you’ll actually get some value in life from learning it. The more you learn about human behaviour (including women) the more that knowledge weighs on you. Keep the grind on my man, it’ll pay off big time 🙏💪🏻
Respectful is proper, but if it isn't exclusive, my mom had taught me the best way to get away from toxicity/drama is just to cut off all communication and move on. Nowadays we call it ghosting. Flag after flag it's best to just move on. Quality deserves quality. Trash deserves the dumpster/curb.
Nah that’s not ghosting. Ghosting happens when you barely know the individual and decide to stop all communication for no apparent reason. Sometimes this does happen as a response to someone’s toxic trait(s), but usually, ghosting happens because people just stop being interested or find someone more suited to them. At least that’s how I see it
@@Teddy_Gautier did you not read my comment? Because I said respectful is proper for ending a relationship, because I was staying in context in response to Alexa, and then, if you actually did read, I changed direction and said that if it isn't exclusive which means you basically defeated your own counter-argument because you said the same thing I said. Save your "nah" for the red flag women
What Courtney is saying about hookup culture is called loss of pair bonding & it's precisely why body counts matter. The more casual sex a person has the more their ability to bond with someone diminishes. There's studies that confirm this. For someone that doesn't really ascribe to hookup culture the odd hookup doesn't affect them too much but if the majority of your sexual history is short-term flings & ons you're doing more harm to yourself than good. It effects men & women equally just not to the same extent, as men with high body counts generally enjoy their shallow sex lives & don't want relationships unlike women that generally do especially if they want kids, unfortunately the thing the think has no consequences is precisely the behavior that is making it impossible for them to have a lasting relationship. Once it's gone it's a long hard road & lots of personal work & therapy to get it back, which if you're over 30 for a woman is time you may not have to spare. If the bulk of your sexual history is within the confines of healthy committed relationship then you likely have strong pair bonding ability. Hookup culture is one of the biggest reasons marriage & birth rates are plummeting. Hooking up isn't inherently bad as long as it isn't your primary form of relationship.
Excellent comment. I could not have done any better (and I’m a psychologist). I wonder if you too work in the field. Hook up culture is rather destructive in general and the sad thing is, the penalties will be felt more in the person’s future than they are during.
@@Straitsfan this is nonsense, it absolutely affects men also. I myself have slept around a bit in the past with fairly low value women and know other men who've done the same, we all agreed we pretty much regret it. Generally men are encouraged to 'slum it' and sleep around to be a stud, I can with 100% certainty say I'd swap all those encounters for a long term relationship with a good lady.
Never confuse someone being honest with you with someone putting you down. If you are a horrible singer but nevertheless you love to sing, asking your partner their opinion and hearing the truth is not them putting you down. And never confuse being encouraging with your goals with soothing you and always petting you and saying you are great all the time.
My favorite approach is: "Hey, I noticed you and I had to come say hi", Follow up with something you noticed about her (don't be gross, but I like how your hair works with your outfit, etc. is fine) And if she's interested, now you just have a conversation with her. If she's not interested (she's looking away, at her phone, body turned away from you), just wish her a nice day and move on.
Same my man. I'm not so old, i am 35. But if I had such information 10-15 years ago i'd make fewer mistakes in dating and relationships in my teens and 20's.
Me too, I'm 61 in good physical, psychological and financial shape and am very active physically and intellectually. I have no family, have introduced myself to over 500 women over the past 2 years since my last partner ended our 'indoor' relationship at the start of the first lockdown, and am trying to be a rejection specialist, realizing that women receive as many messages in a day as I get in a year. I am a successful therapist and see many attractive women whom I have asked out over the past 27 years, and they've all let me down nicely and continued to see me for treatment- otherwise, online sites are the only way to safely approach women... knowing that this might take many more years... I go to a fitness centre 2-3 times a week (skiing or hiking other days), but there is a strict policy to leave women alone , and I'd rather not be expelled! And on dating sites, the rule is the first no is the final no, and never pursue/stalk a woman lest the 'perp' gets suspended or expelled.
Gotta say, ladies, that was one healthy, intelligent and useful discussion. As far as the dude who was wondering what do about how his girl was treating him, my advice to him would be, 'get a clue, skippy'. She's probably been trying to tell you she's not (or is no longer) interested, and you just aren't gettin' it. Try talking less, and listening more, ESPECIALLY when it comes to the women in your life. It shows you care about and respect her. Of course if she's toxic and negative, then just move on...obviously. Same goes for the ladies reading this. Thanks Courtney and Alexa.
Just to add onto the hook-up culture subject. Very true. This is why men typically do not commit to women with a promiscuous past. They are harder to bond with and many more con's. There's consequences for engaging in those activities.
17:02 So I did my first ever cold approach at the gym yesterday. It was a gym that was about an hour away from where I live but I was in the area running errands. I figured I wouldn’t see her again for a while, so I walked up to her as I was leaving, right after she finished her set. I used the line Courtney mentioned at 18:43 and keep it pretty casual, by asking about how long she’s been working out for, and what routine she was following ext… Kept it short and told her that she should come up to my regular gym and for her phone number. She gave it to me but unfortunately never texted me back, but I took that L and just applauded myself for having the guts to do it in the first place! I don’t know if I shoulda done it differently, but it is what it is! Keep up the great content Courtney!
Good job, man! Not every approach is gonna end the way you'd prefer, but as long as you're making the effort to step out of your comfort zone, and then reviewing how it all went to see what you could do better next time (like athletes watching game footage), you are on the right track.
You used that line and wasted your time, just like the guy that used it on Courtney did. It sounds nice and cute, but the paramount thing that the ladies didn't mention is that if a woman is interested in a guy, she'll put herself in his orbit. In other words, she'll subtly let him know of her interest through such things as smiling, lingering around or even starting a conversation. Instead of saying this, Courtney's advice seemed targeted at complete morons or aliens who landed yesterday on planet Earth. (things such as to not approach her when she's running on the treadmill or squatting...c'mon man, who does that?)
@@GubyIQ Of course they like it, it's an ego boost for them. And I agree with you if they like you they will let you know. I also noticed her advice seems more suited for introverts.
The second question kinda answers itself. You can't truly focus on building a long-term relationship if you're engaging in hookup culture, and I firmly believe that some people just engage in it because it's the IT thing to do nowadays. Not because they enjoy doing it, but just because they don't want to be seen as a loser or outsider for not hooking up with every single person they meet.
Modern women wanting traditional men don’t add up, I’ve always paid for dates but I can see where the guys are coming from. Men have to fit into this weird 1950s/ 2022 box that just doesn’t work.
This is an accurate observation. Men are expected to be a 1950's type gentleman but the majority of women in 2022 aren't ladies. It really works out to what I call opportunistic Feminism. In other words, a lot of women are all for equality as long as it benefits them. But the moment it doesn't, they want to revert to traditionalism. Tails they win, heads the men lose.
"It's not that hard" says the gender that never approaches lol. Getting rejected over and over is really awful. I'm much more selective with approaching now
Hm I thought they did acknowledge it was hard and was happy to see that. It’s a good quality in a person to be able to appreciate how it’s difficult to be someone else.
It is very reassuring to hear that younger ladies want to preserve traditional values. I'm an older male that still believes in chivalry, dignity, respect and civility. Unfortunately I am widowed after 27 years. Courtney you and your friend are amazingly knowledgeable for young ladies in your age group. I would also like to add for anyone that reads this, physical attraction is nice but also understand that couples should also be able to be friends. Friendship is the core of all beautiful lasting relationships. Thank you ladies 🙏
Recently started approaching random people and then moved on to chicks i wanted to get to know. Let me tell you its not like climbing a mountain guys, its more like stepping up onto the curb. Most people even if they dont feel like talking will be respectful if you are. Like Courtney said just say something that makes sense and be chill. GL out there.
@@johnv7968 hey, thats quite broad of a question but the first thing that came to mind was the more interested i was in others the more the were interested in me. A smile and genuine interest goes a long way.
Last year I wanted to improve on myself even more. I had to cut some people out of my life. Doesn't mean I'm not friends with them, but I don't seek them out as much. And then finding positive strengthening encouragement to add. Those things have helped me so much. Hopefully it helps you as well. Thank you Courtney for another great video.
do not base a relationship on a physical connection. kids will come. that changes everything. think of a relationship as cake with ingredients of companionship, sharing and building life experiences and enriching each others time with each other. intimacy is the icing on the cake.
Courtney, the paying for the date portion by itself isn't really what guys have a problem with. The REAL problem guys have is the expectation from women that they pay for the first date. It represents an entitled type behavior, not to say that you are entitled, but Matthew in his video was correct. That is telling a guy that "you have to pay to have my time" and that represents a bad image in the guy's mind about the girl. That's why a lot of guys have a problem with that paying question. Another reason why guys don't wanna pay nowadays is because a lot of women take advantage of this for a free meal or to take their mind off of an ex or because she's bored, and they use the guy for his wallet and never have any intention of taking him seriously. It's the same thing as guys just using women for their body and then ghosting them. Men don't wanna be used. If we are going to spend our money on a girl, we wanna know damn well that she actually genuinely cares about us. Another thing I want to say is that I don't necessarily agree with you when you say that if the guy doesn't pay fully that means he's not into you. I have come to notice is that some guys don't pay for the full first date to guage the behavior of the woman that is in front of them. Because you don't know what type of woman they are, so you don't know if they are worthy of being in a relationship with. This is just one way of guys finding out. Look at this video from Darius M and it'll explain it perfectly: ruclips.net/video/CF-V-pgr0GU/видео.html
@Jay Bee But that's the thing, what makes you think that you are entitled to a man's wallet? That's what men hear every time a woman complains that a guy doesn't pay fully for them. Especially on a first date. We don't know you. We don't know if ur relationship material or not, and most importantly we don't know if your taking us seriously or if ur just using us for our money. And yet you still think that you're entitled to being paid fully for? That's a privilege that only a girlfriend or wife has, AFTER she proves she's worthy of that treatment. Guys have to start off low investment until the WOMEN starts proving that she's taking us seriously. That's when guys think it is safe to spend more on a woman, when they are sure that she is serious about them, not before. And another thing, a bunch of guys do pay fully and they still don't get relationships from women so that's not a very accurate statement.
The reason why the question of "should men pay on the first date", is polarizing, is because the the social narrative now, is female empowerment, and "equal rights, and opportunity", and "I'm a queen, treat me like one". Men see it as, "you want "equal", you got it sweetheart, you can pay for your own dinner". This is just my own observation. It's the "expectation", that turns men off.
Hook up culture was a shock to me, i was married throughout all my 20s, and then single at 33, I was on straight survival mode. Took me some time to adapt and figure out how to navigate. Still, I prefer the traditional way of meeting people and forming a relationship. Social media kills authenticity.
It looks like the "who pays on the first date" is a big topic today due to the Matthew Hussey video. I had 3 other content creators on my feed talk about the same video/topic. Most men enjoy providing and I actually like the tradition of men paying for the first date as it sets the right tone - e.g., masculine/feminine polarity If the woman paid for the first date, that's fine too but it sets the tone of the woman being the "provider" (whether that's actually the case or not), and IMO is not a good way to start a relationship because it initiates the wrong sexual dynamic. All this being said, many modern women have learned to take advantage of this tradition so they can get free meals and experiences, so totally understand why many modern men are refusing to pay for dates.
"Most men enjoy providing and I actually like the tradition of men paying for the first date as it sets the right tone - e.g., masculine/feminine polarity" What do you feel men should expect from women, to contribute to that polarity, that isn't expected also expected of men?
@@Youttubeuser20932 Be feminine during that date, allow the man to lead and take you around, don't try to emasculate him and "show who's boss". It's insane how much power and influence women could have if they just embraced femininity instead of trying to compete with men using masculinity. Women trying to compete with men in a man's domain (testosterone, aggression, masculinity, ambition, boldness) is like a cheetah trying to outlift a gorilla. Sure, maybe the strongest cheetah can outlift the absolute weakest and most frail gorilla in the world, but why compete in that domain when the cheetah can simply outrun ALL gorillas?
This has been a hot topic LONG before that Matthew Hussey video. His video is likely just putting it to the mainstream. The topic of who should pay on the first date has been brewing for years alongside the growth of feminism and the conversation surrounding “gender equality”. It likely came to a head when men started to realize that said talk of “equality” was/is only present when it’s convenient for women and only in the areas that they want. It’s very curious how dating is the one area where everything must remain traditional yet everything else can be “modern”. With that said, we as men do want to provide. But only to women who show that they RESPECT and APPRECIATE said provision and most importantly respond with feminine reciprocity. Which speaks to the end of your comment where you mention how modern women have weaponized tradition in order to get free meals/experiences. This is what birthed the question of “who should pay on the first date?” men finally getting fed up with being used.
I've made a lot of mistakes when dating, watched too much red pill stuff.. but finally here's a channel that gives the right advice. Even your voice has a reassurance about it that it will work out.. thank you.
Respectfully, my time is not worth less than a woman's time. Paying for a first date should be something I choose to do, not something I should be expected to do. It's not about the money. It's about the principle.
Agree. Paying for dates is an outdated norm born of a time when many women literally weren't allowed to work and provide for themselves; the man had to pay for the date to be possible! No longer true. Additionally, with the proliferation of the Internet and modern smartphones, people are now primarily meeting as strangers on neutral ground rather than going out with people they're already acquainted with. It's one thing to pay for a friend, whose company you already know you enjoy and who may feel an obligation to accept your invite for relationship maintenance even if they don't like or can't afford the activity in question, than to pay for a stranger who is accepting for their own personal benefit and there for the exact same reasons you are.
I have it written in my dating profile that I don't pay for the first date. I get more hate messages than I do actual dates, but I need to know that you're coming on a date with me because you actually like me and you see me as more than a "free meal." As you wrote above it's not about the money itself, it's the principle of the exchange. The tradition of men paying for the first date was because the woman often didn't have a job of her own and the man had the expendable income to pay for two people. Times have changed and the majority of women are in the work force. She can argue that women make 78 cents per every dollar a man makes but that's still 78 cents more than 2, 3 and 4 generations ago when women in the workforce was an anomaly. I think having the woman pay for her own dinner on date 1 is a good way to weed out the gold diggers and not waste a man's time. And it's the fairest exchange where the only real sacrifice you're making is the time investment for both parties involved.
@@SeemsLogical I like that idea. I think the drawback though, is that women’s dating expectations are so warped, that using a filtering method like that will dry up what little interest the average guy would get in the first place (as evidenced by okcupid’s data and numerous anecdotal profile swaps).
@@philosopherking506 Oh it's very effective at filtering out women who never had any intention of committing to me in the first place! I may be alone for longer but it saves me from wasting time on a bad woman and missing out on a good woman who I may have missed an opportunity with because I was trying to make things work with a bad woman. Reasonable women are rare but I'd rather hold out for one of those than settle for a woman who will not respect me as a human being.
@@philosopherking506 I will die alone before I compromise my principles. Gonna die alone because 90% of women are already pre-filtering me for being short and I can't get a date to save my life anyway, but that's aside the point.
If someone is putting you down for trying to be a better you I have a couple words I like to say to them…. “Kick rocks”. No one deserves to be put down and if someone is doing that they shouldn’t be in your life
I really appreciate the positivity and respectful viewpoints from your videos. Its nice to get genuine advice from someone who encourages self respect as well as self assessment. Thank you for promoting such a healthy outlook to the dating world, I'm glad i found your videos.
The fancy restaurant first date is still in most peoples mind of the real date. I had girls tell me I needed to pay for an Italian restaurant first date in college when I worked at Cracker Barrel. I wouldn’t have been able to eat for a week after that! I still say even if you can afford it, it’s not really the best environment to get to know someone.
Great advice and thank you. On the first one, and every relationship where one person is just ready for more and the other does not want to change for some reason... not ready or whatever the reason is...one thing they could do is pray for the other person. I heard from a friend of mine I respect deeply (she is now about 55 and I am a 70 year old man and this was 20 years ago) that she likes to envision the other person being happy and on stage at a podium. I think it was a technique she learned from somewhere. The result I think was that very quickly any bad images we may have of a person which could contribute something less than constructive, are dissolved and our mind naturally goes on once we have success at wanting what is best for others regardless of what they may have done or said to us and that we may have blamed them for. The way I approach ill feelings of others is reminding myself that the whole world needs love and that this person is the exact remedy for that situation or for all people to receive love again by my loving them as their creator does. Or, if more in line, what their mother and father should have given them from birth. That of course is only unconditional love. No farmer would plant seeds in tainted soil, so all people only need to be exposed to unconditional love to grow properly and mature completely. Where does that come from ? For me it came from this book and its writer that a trusted friend recommended to me 48 years ago. Maybe it could have value to a person reading this one day. www.tparents.org/Library/Unification/Books/DP06/0-Toc.htm Thank you for reading my comment.
It's 100% true. There's multiple videos of two guys going out, one ugly, one hot. They say the same things and see the reactions of the women, and the attractive guy can get away with almost anything. I'll say something to add to it though, the way a woman reacts to and lets down the ugly men seriously puts on display the contents of their character. High quality feminine women don't put men on blast for shooting their shot. It is almost like some women are self conscious and think ugly men asking them out lowers their social status if these men think they have a chance with the woman. Not to mention verbally attacking a man in public is a masculine trait.
It's proper etiquette for the person who invites the other on a date usually pays, however, they could always go " dutch" & " split" the bill!...Pretty simple! Nobody feels obligated or " owns" the other!... A date should not involve any " pressure!" It's a fact finding adventure to determine if there's a spark, chemistry and a connection! Never any high expectations from either individual...When you start the" right" way... you end the "right way!"...Period...
Always great to see another of your clips, especially with Alexa Lee. She's very empathetic and positive. Edit: As a guy, I'm really not into the whole hook up culture either. Hope I'm not the only one.
Alexa is amazing! I really miss her on Channel.3. She is the only one of your guests that actually gives true advice. Her thoughts are truly genuine and insightful. Please invite more women on that are thoughtful with their words. Great video!
Men should not be expected to pay on dates, even if its just a coffee because it's not about the money, it's about the message it's sending. The message is you're more valuable than me so I'm going to pay for you. That being said as a guy I usually do offer to pay at least on the first date because I'm happy to do so IF I like her but if the girl then doesn't even offer once to pay, that's a red flag because it's the entitlement and the expectation of it that irks me. And if I ever do suggest we split the bill and it bothers her, that's a red flag too.
It's true, you become the average of the 5ppl you spend the most time with. Losers lose and winners keep learning+improving&winning. This is why Courtney has such great guests; ladies with wisdom and manners, just like RUclips's favorite big sis! Road to 2M!
I find it more compelling to make promises to others rather than myself. Promises to myself, if I break them or fail, well, I figure "it's just me" and no one else is affected, so there is less pressure. But if it's for other people, there's more pressure not to fail or flake out. I would feel worse letting others down than letting myself down. I guess it depends on what motivates you. As long as whatever way gets the best results, there is no wrong way.
The best approach I ever did was: In an office building (long time ago), an attractive woman was with 3 men in their business suits walking into a lift. I made up my mind, I walked up and put my hand on the door so it wouldnt close. I was fake talking on my phone (as if I was busy). I looked at the woman, handed my business card to her and in the same moment said: "Your stunning" and then I took my hand off the door and left. She called me that night.
Her advice to men about their terrible situations is great. Her advice on how to meet women at the gym is exactly like Patrice Oneill says, It's like asking a fish how they want to be fished.
I feel strongly about the last question. It's not about masculinity, it's about fairness. Just because the both of you think guys should pay doesn't mean that's how everyone sees it and goes to show how oblivious you are to foreign affairs. In some cultures, they either go half or pay their fair share, even on the first dates or meeting. They want to be seen as equal so offering to pay on their behalf can come across as offensive and is a turn off. The women I'm going for are from a country where gender equality is huge and they are turned off by a guy who offers to pay for the first dates. In fact, "dates" here actually feel more like casual hangouts. You said it yourself, the first date is meant to get to know each other, but you've also said if a guy offers to go half, you just assume he's not into you when that's not always necessarily the case. There's always a reason behind everything so how did you reach that conclusion? Maybe it's not in his culture, but cultural differences don't stop international couples which are rising. Paying on a turn-by-turn basis will likely result in the girl abusing it by waiting long enough until the guy forgets and he's always the one paying. This whole "chivalrous" thing is so stupid to me and an insult to those of us who are gender equality supporters. We don't live in those times anymore and gender equality is growing. The definition of chivalry combines a bunch of traits but one is "readiness to help the weak"...you're basically indirectly signaling women as weak by paying for them. Traditionalist women are typically the ones who take advantage of men, expecting to get things for free, but where do you draw the line? When you get to the root of the question: what makes a guy paying for the first date masculine? Answer that. If you can't, it proves how stupid this whole thing is, following a tradition without understand its origin. Traditions are fine when there's no harm to it, but in this case there is...to men
I just find it interesting how guys have to put themselves out there and go out of their way to do all the work . Meanwhile, women do what exactly? Just wait around while we have to approach them, take them out on dates, entertain them?
I feel that, I think men should approach most of the time but it goes both ways and we shouldn’t have to put in all the work to get a relationship going, today dating world is ridiculous
I approach alot of men even get their number then it's up to you men to lead because we love that, so as a woman I was taught not to approach etc but in the last year I changed that..but as soon as I a woman take the lead then I sit back and want you to plan then nothing happens..so now I still approach but if a man can't set up a date after that I leave it, but we are all just so confused because my gosh we have these relationship gurus telling woman a bunch of bullshit.
I always plan to pay, no matter if it's first date or not. I was raised to always bring enough to pay for everyone, even if it's a double date, a group outing etc.
Comment to the poster Hi there, I have been watching a lot of videos like this on your channel and other people's channels as well (Not really looling for anything. I just like listening to the commentary). But after listening to many such commentaries, especially many about how difficult the dating scene is, I have formed an opinion of my own. I have come to the conclusion that when it comes to dating many of us can be in a rush to find "THE ONE" (barring those who are just in it for the hook-up of course). I think many try to start something out of thin air based solely on looks. That is generally why people ask for your number, because they think someone looks good then they automatically move to the date to try to get to know each other, which I think is a little backward and is how people end up feeling used on a date after it doesn't furnish the results they want. I strongly believe it is better to try to get to know someone before date them romantically. We spend so much time trying to figure out if the person will like us based on whether they give us there number or allows us to text them that we forget to ask ourselves if we could like them as a person FIRST. I think a healthier way to start any relationship (if you are really serious about it) is to just hang out with the person, just spend time with them AS a person. Get to know them as a person and a friend first. Learn their character. This way, once you ask for the date, you don't have to worry as much whether the person likes you or what their motivations for going out with you are. You'll know already and probably be able to enjoy the experience more. If things progress after that, it's just the icing on the cake. It's an old fashioned concept, I know, and not one many are willing to practice, but for the person who is serious about finding someone, I think it could work. I would love to get your opinion and feedback on in.
A comment or suggestion on the first message you read from the guy that wants to breakup with his girlfriend because of her putting him down. Yes, I agree it certainly should be done in person, however, it is probably prudent to have that conversation in a public place such as a restaurant, etc. We don't know the intricate details of that relationship or in what manner she is putting him down. Nonetheless, if her alleged behavior is driven by temper or an impulsivity issue, that conversation if done in private setting such as a residence, can take a bad turn. If so, then it escalates to a domestic issue involving law enforcement. In a public setting, there are witnesses. More importantly, either one can simply get up and walk away if the situation gets out of control. On the other end of the spectrum, a private setting such as a residence is conducive to "reconciliation" based things getting "heated" in a good way and the next day, he is back to square one. Nothing accomplished there. If there is some potential for reconciliation, that can start in a public place via a constructive conversation.
Courtney your a great woman your like that big sister/wing woman I’ve never had in my life thanks for your advice it seems like good insight. I love your guests too they seem wise and knowledgeable also have a good one keep up the good work girl
Here’s a tip for complimenting people in general: Don’t compliment something they were born with, compliment a choice they made. It’s shows you have a common mental ground that you can build from. If your approaching someone the physical attraction is assumed.
Charlie Sheen is my dating coach. He always tells me "always be a gentleman and pay for the date" I think he and I have different ideas as to what a date is but,the principal still applies.
Here's my unnuanced take on the whole split bill thing. If there's going to be no 2nd date and you're going your separate ways from then on anyway, you should start by going your separate ways on the bill at that moment too.
If I pay on the first date is she going to put out on the first date? If she expects me to be traditional then I expect her to as well. I know a lot of people are going to say that If I invited her then I pay. That's great and all but the chances of her inviting me are slim to none.
@@Nero-Caesar Agreed. Some of my favorite memories in my life is watching these episodes for the first time. For instance, the one where they think Mac is a serial ki ller, and at the end they remake To Catch a Predator. I actually watched episodes where I focused only one character the entire time to see their actions and reactions.
Thanks for the dialogue, I like this format, also with someone that's not the same age who comes with perhaps a different perspective. I don't think women sympathise enough about how pricey it can get in a major city if you're dating around. I have certainly pulled away from meeting some matches on dating apps with the thought that it's getting too costly, so let's not do go on too many dates this month.
Hey Courtney thanks again for another wonderful vid. I had my second date told her i was a dad which she took in shock. Then she proceeded to say how she isn't feeling it with the vibes ( dont really know what that means) she is going on a holiday for a long weekend coming back sunday , whould it be that bad to ask her via a single text if she wants go give it one last shot after she comes back
jmo take the hint she isnt interested, she said so, and is going away for a long weekend vacation where she will be hanging out with men she does like so i think u are wasting your time
True! She seems to have successfully and gracefully made it through the epiphany phase and remained elegant as a woman. Alexa should get into public speaking 💪
Yeah but Courtney a girl picked up a piece of paper that I dropped and it had a line on it. I told her that she was so sweet because she picked up my line. She couldn’t stop laughing!! Hahaha 🤣
Hookup culture is extremely dangerous. There’s been a study that proved the more sexual partners a person has, the lower the chances are that they can create a long term relationship. Basically, if a person has been having hookups/ casual relationship they are highly risky partners. Basically their choices disqualify them from having a normal romantic relationship
I loving the evolution of your channel Courtney and the great advice as always. Keep up the great content you're a gem with genuine and wholesome views ❤️
I really identify with this guy because I had a similar experience and found out afterward why it all happened. I was in a relationship that was fantastic for 4 1/2 years. We were both in college, joined a work-out class to burn off our "happy weight" and we got into great shape. It was at this point where her criticism started. She became critical of every minute movement I made. It seemed like a tidal wave that had built up minutely without my notice, then became a never-ending torrent of negativity. We eventually broke up because "it just wasn't working out." I moved out and her professor moved in. It immediately became apparent that her negativity served two purposes: being critical of me reinforced to her that I was actually the terrible person she was making me out to be, thereby justifying her cheating. Secondly, her lashing out at me was a weakness, trying to make herself unpalatable in my eyes, attempting to push me to break up with her so that she could accept the break up and walk away with her new suitor, guilt free. The professor had a wife and daughter, as well. Overall, if she is treating you like garbage, it may be that she is trying to force you to break up with her so that she can be both the victim and the rescued. (Abbreviated version. It was actually much worse) P.S. I really like your guest's point that telling someone why you are ending the relationship can be a great learning opportunity for someone, especially if you do care about them.
what happened was she lost weight, she looked better, got more attention from other men, more confidence, started finding u boring, the tingles had gone away and became argumentative so that u would leave her so she could be with the professor she wanted it happens a lot, they lose weight, feel more confident, and cheat with the personal trainer or the co-worker/boss or professor that they feel is above you
I had such a girlfriend, a psychotherapist, who pointed out all kinds of flaws. She ultimately dumped me, but I have been addressing those flaws. I'm pretty confident that the next one I find would really not have much to complain about. I talked to an internet dating guru for awhile also who basically convinced me that I'm a good catch and to quit worrying about what's wrong with me. What it seems to come down to for me is access. I live in a small town where the only available women are too young for me. Maybe I should move to the city where there are some Alexa Lee's around that I could meet!
Commenting on a girl's appearance in the gym is not ALWAYS bad. I find it works pretty well, if she's doing shoulder or back exercises, to give her praise for being well-built in those areas.
The point is to not compliment things out of their control, which is what you didn't do, so good for you. Just don't comment on things like their skin color, their eye color, how big their t*ts are or whatever since it can weird them out and get awkward.
I'm in my 40s and have paid for many first dates. I'm not doing that anymore, even though lots of those dates went on to become relationships. I think women need to realise that the final instalment of Feminism is arriving (guys will only split the check/ the draft bill presented to congress for women to be drafted to the military like men etc) She works and pays taxes like me, so why should I pay? It's really outdated now (and dont blame me, I was always happy to pay for a date if I asked a woman out, but not anymore) Also some women will use a guy for a free dinner, which is disrespectful, and I don't hear enough women calling them out on it. Many younger women seem to have a creeping sense on entitlement. Great discussion btw! 👍
Thought would make a suggestion on a video topic... "What women can learn from women with lots of guy friends." Some of the most remarkable women and those men respect most I never hear about. As men it is always great to remind ourselves what high quality can be, even though we feel unworthy of it more often than not.
I love boulder thats where I would go on my first date, used to live there such a beautiful suburb town lots of things to do and fun college atmosphere there!! Denver's great to but a cute little date is Where BOULDER is TAILORED made for that type of stuff!!
Hey Courtney, being a somewhat quiet and reserved guy, what topics should be brought up and talked about to keep the conversation going and keep in interesting? Also what not to bring up or talk about.
guys migrate into hookup culture when they think they have to pay for every date. and regrettably, broaching the subject of who pays for dates is a deal-breaker for girls, which means that they are not open to having that conversation and you are forced to guess or just make a decision for yourself and hope she is okay with it. For larger context, the assumption that the guy should pay for the first date is the same as the assumption that a woman should sleep with a man by the end of the third date (a commonly held thought in some cultures/societies). All of these subjects should be up for conversation between the people directly involved in the date/relationship.
I think most women are cap. They say no cheesy lines. no corny lines; but sometimes that shyt works. It all depends on your approach and most of all, look. If shes attracted to u off the rip you can say just about anything. Ive seen friends use negging and rudeness and/or say corny lines and get the number. I, myself, have used cheesy lines on purpose to get that laugh and it work. If they find you appealing it doesn't matter what you say, just say with conviction and smoothness. Just don't be aggressive and ignorant. And most important, KNOW WHEN TO WALK AWAY.
Great insight except for the take on who pays for the first date. Didn’t hear any compelling reasons why the guy should pay or why the girl should not pay. I agree the first date shouldn’t be any place fancy. And yes if the first date goes well good women will often offer to cover the next date. The problem I have with paying for the first date is it sets the tone that you’re going to be the provider moving forward and I want a partner that can contribute to the relationship.
If you had to choose between a gf that had 1 or 2 serious boyfriends and a gf that has been having fwb, ons and what not, which one would you pick and commit? It´s common sense at this point. And though I don´t have to worry about that if I had daughters I´d strongly advice against having boyfriends that had fwb, ons, you name it. Don´t hold high hopes for someone like that. If an employer had 2 candidates for hiring, will one of them say "it´s all in the past, my past doesn´t make me. That I was unemployed for 5 years and didn´t study anything meanwhile doesn´t mean that the guy that has been working and studying round the calendar is a better hiring. I´m awesome! I´m a catch!".
Hey Courtney, question for you.. so I watched the portion of video talking about approaching in public, and I’ve never really had a problem with starting a conversation.. but how do I change the conversation from something causal, to more of a “can I get your number” sort of thing?
It does still happen, Alexa. My ex and I used to have both passionate and fun connectivity (we'll call it). It's sad that after a while she felt she was standing in the way of me being happy, although I can understand now since throughout the majority of my exclusive relationships I've always been the one to put in the most effort. Year after year I become a better gentleman, and a better man, with energy and strength like I'm still 19, but hey, that's testosterone for ya 😂
You can help a woman's self confidence, but if you don't help the self worth issues, then she'll never feel worthy and release you back into the wild. Oh well. It just boosted my mental rigidity and self worth once I got over the whole breakup
As a man, I'm always paying for the first. My mindset is that I'm paying for all of them, as I like to lead. The ladies here are spot on about their advice though. Stay smooth fellow kings.
I am 50 years old man, married for 18, so these advices do not really apply to me, however, I am surprised about the approach culture. Seems to me that every year that pass by is harder and harder, being a gentleman sometimes can be consider creepy, you have to restraint to say a compliment, hold the door, offer the seat, etc. I met my wife when I was 29, before that, I always paid for my dates, now I pay for my family expenses :D,. I passed to my son the same advice that my dad gave me when I started dating: Do you want a woman, well, work hard because they are expensive.
If *only* we could replace the countless entitled modern "men" with clones of you... thank you so much for being a gentleman and passing that on to your son!
Love your channel Courtney and you're usually spot on! However, I don't think either of you really understand why men have reached a breaking point with paying for first dates. It's because modern Western women (generally) have an unbelievable sense of entitlement and have no issue accepting a free meal even if they already decided internally that they have no romantic or sexual interest. You'd be amazed at how common this is. Only the top 1% of "High Value" men are able to avoid this. Also, feminist rhetoric constantly contradicts itself. Modern women claim they want equality but keep proving over and over again through action that they don't want equality...they want to keep the all the benefits that come with the territory of womanhood while simultaneously acquiring all the benefits that come with the territory of manhood, but without any of the responsibility or accountability....even in sharing responsibility of something as simple as a date. You either want equality across the board or you want traditional gender roles...it doesn't work both ways.
I’ve been struggling with the hookup culture recently, not because I partake, but it seems like everyone around me has such a casual outlook on sex in general whether it’s people i know, communities or society in general and it’s been really hard keeping faith that I’ll find someone who feels the same way as I do and treats sex like it should be, an intimate and special experience. This video made me feel better about it so thank you!
Agreeed💯💯💯
Keep going 💪
keep speaking up against it
say it's not healthy and people need to stop
Maybe it is more needle in the haystack to meet someone that doesn't want to rush into sex, and values it enough to save it for only a committed relationship. We're out there.
I'm studying computer science and trying to understand modern dating.
Computer science is a hundred times easier to understand.
Buy "Algorithms to Live By" - I'm not even kidding here!
Lmao. Me 😢😂
facts
I just started myself - at least with computer science you’ll actually get some value in life from learning it.
The more you learn about human behaviour (including women) the more that knowledge weighs on you.
Keep the grind on my man, it’ll pay off big time 🙏💪🏻
@@urlauburlaub2222 are women really masculinizing? i dont think thats whats going on
Respectful is proper, but if it isn't exclusive, my mom had taught me the best way to get away from toxicity/drama is just to cut off all communication and move on. Nowadays we call it ghosting. Flag after flag it's best to just move on. Quality deserves quality. Trash deserves the dumpster/curb.
Nah that’s not ghosting. Ghosting happens when you barely know the individual and decide to stop all communication for no apparent reason. Sometimes this does happen as a response to someone’s toxic trait(s), but usually, ghosting happens because people just stop being interested or find someone more suited to them. At least that’s how I see it
💯
@@Teddy_Gautier did you not read my comment? Because I said respectful is proper for ending a relationship, because I was staying in context in response to Alexa, and then, if you actually did read, I changed direction and said that if it isn't exclusive which means you basically defeated your own counter-argument because you said the same thing I said. Save your "nah" for the red flag women
@@LatimusChadimus then we all good 👍🏾
@@Teddy_Gautier hahaha 👍
What Courtney is saying about hookup culture is called loss of pair bonding & it's precisely why body counts matter. The more casual sex a person has the more their ability to bond with someone diminishes. There's studies that confirm this. For someone that doesn't really ascribe to hookup culture the odd hookup doesn't affect them too much but if the majority of your sexual history is short-term flings & ons you're doing more harm to yourself than good. It effects men & women equally just not to the same extent, as men with high body counts generally enjoy their shallow sex lives & don't want relationships unlike women that generally do especially if they want kids, unfortunately the thing the think has no consequences is precisely the behavior that is making it impossible for them to have a lasting relationship. Once it's gone it's a long hard road & lots of personal work & therapy to get it back, which if you're over 30 for a woman is time you may not have to spare.
If the bulk of your sexual history is within the confines of healthy committed relationship then you likely have strong pair bonding ability. Hookup culture is one of the biggest reasons marriage & birth rates are plummeting. Hooking up isn't inherently bad as long as it isn't your primary form of relationship.
Super interesting! Thanks for posting this.
This only applies to women, not men. Men can pretty much sleep around and it doesn't affect them psychologically.
That's absolute BS spread around the manosphere to denigrate women.
Excellent comment. I could not have done any better (and I’m a psychologist). I wonder if you too work in the field. Hook up culture is rather destructive in general and the sad thing is, the penalties will be felt more in the person’s future than they are during.
@@Straitsfan this is nonsense, it absolutely affects men also. I myself have slept around a bit in the past with fairly low value women and know other men who've done the same, we all agreed we pretty much regret it.
Generally men are encouraged to 'slum it' and sleep around to be a stud, I can with 100% certainty say I'd swap all those encounters for a long term relationship with a good lady.
Never confuse someone being honest with you with someone putting you down.
If you are a horrible singer but nevertheless you love to sing, asking your partner their opinion and hearing the truth is not them putting you down.
And never confuse being encouraging with your goals with soothing you and always petting you and saying you are great all the time.
My favorite approach is: "Hey, I noticed you and I had to come say hi",
Follow up with something you noticed about her (don't be gross, but I like how your hair works with your outfit, etc. is fine)
And if she's interested, now you just have a conversation with her.
If she's not interested (she's looking away, at her phone, body turned away from you), just wish her a nice day and move on.
solid advices and not rocket science, thank u
I just walk through parks with my arm in a sling and see who comes up to provide assistance...
I am an older man. But I wish when I were younger, there was information like what you provide. It is right on the point. You provide great content!
Aww, thank you for the kind comment. I’m glad you’re here ☺️
Same my man. I'm not so old, i am 35. But if I had such information 10-15 years ago i'd make fewer mistakes in dating and relationships in my teens and 20's.
@@CourtneyRyan hi Courtney.. I need your help, seriously. I'm in a situation and o don't know what to do... Please help. Thanks.
Puhlease. It’s common sense. Sorry, no do-overs old dude.
Me too, I'm 61 in good physical, psychological and financial shape and am very active physically and intellectually. I have no family, have introduced myself to over 500 women over the past 2 years since my last partner ended our 'indoor' relationship at the start of the first lockdown, and am trying to be a rejection specialist, realizing that women receive as many messages in a day as I get in a year. I am a successful therapist and see many attractive women whom I have asked out over the past 27 years, and they've all let me down nicely and continued to see me for treatment- otherwise, online sites are the only way to safely approach women... knowing that this might take many more years... I go to a fitness centre 2-3 times a week (skiing or hiking other days), but there is a strict policy to leave women alone , and I'd rather not be expelled! And on dating sites, the rule is the first no is the final no, and never pursue/stalk a woman lest the 'perp' gets suspended or expelled.
Gotta say, ladies, that was one healthy, intelligent and useful discussion. As far as the dude who was wondering what do about how his girl was treating him, my advice to him would be, 'get a clue, skippy'. She's probably been trying to tell you she's not (or is no longer) interested, and you just aren't gettin' it. Try talking less, and listening more, ESPECIALLY when it comes to the women in your life. It shows you care about and respect her. Of course if she's toxic and negative, then just move on...obviously. Same goes for the ladies reading this. Thanks Courtney and Alexa.
Just to add onto the hook-up culture subject. Very true. This is why men typically do not commit to women with a promiscuous past. They are harder to bond with and many more con's. There's consequences for engaging in those activities.
What about men with very promiscuous pasts?? I find them to be extremely hard to connect with.
It is also affecting men.
17:02 So I did my first ever cold approach at the gym yesterday. It was a gym that was about an hour away from where I live but I was in the area running errands. I figured I wouldn’t see her again for a while, so I walked up to her as I was leaving, right after she finished her set.
I used the line Courtney mentioned at 18:43 and keep it pretty casual, by asking about how long she’s been working out for, and what routine she was following ext…
Kept it short and told her that she should come up to my regular gym and for her phone number. She gave it to me but unfortunately never texted me back, but I took that L and just applauded myself for having the guts to do it in the first place! I don’t know if I shoulda done it differently, but it is what it is!
Keep up the great content Courtney!
I’m so proud 💪🏼 keep killing it!!!
Good job, man!
Not every approach is gonna end the way you'd prefer, but as long as you're making the effort to step out of your comfort zone, and then reviewing how it all went to see what you could do better next time (like athletes watching game footage), you are on the right track.
Just shoot out a regular call. It’s not a loss if there’s no response on the first shot.
You used that line and wasted your time, just like the guy that used it on Courtney did. It sounds nice and cute, but the paramount thing that the ladies didn't mention is that if a woman is interested in a guy, she'll put herself in his orbit. In other words, she'll subtly let him know of her interest through such things as smiling, lingering around or even starting a conversation. Instead of saying this, Courtney's advice seemed targeted at complete morons or aliens who landed yesterday on planet Earth. (things such as to not approach her when she's running on the treadmill or squatting...c'mon man, who does that?)
@@GubyIQ Of course they like it, it's an ego boost for them. And I agree with you if they like you they will let you know. I also noticed her advice seems more suited for introverts.
Courtney’s channel is blowing up! Can’t believe she got Christina Applegate as a guest.
🤣
She could definitely play her in The Christina Applegate Story
The second question kinda answers itself. You can't truly focus on building a long-term relationship if you're engaging in hookup culture, and I firmly believe that some people just engage in it because it's the IT thing to do nowadays. Not because they enjoy doing it, but just because they don't want to be seen as a loser or outsider for not hooking up with every single person they meet.
Totally agree!
Or they EXPECT hooking up early will lead to a long term relationship. Which usually doesn’t
Modern women wanting traditional men don’t add up, I’ve always paid for dates but I can see where the guys are coming from. Men have to fit into this weird 1950s/ 2022 box that just doesn’t work.
This is an accurate observation. Men are expected to be a 1950's type gentleman but the majority of women in 2022 aren't ladies. It really works out to what I call opportunistic Feminism. In other words, a lot of women are all for equality as long as it benefits them. But the moment it doesn't, they want to revert to traditionalism. Tails they win, heads the men lose.
Modern women don't want traditional men.
They want progressive men.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 But progressive men who still pay for everything and do stuff for them.
Who does it work for?
"It's not that hard" says the gender that never approaches lol. Getting rejected over and over is really awful. I'm much more selective with approaching now
Yup......this channel is hilarious
Hm I thought they did acknowledge it was hard and was happy to see that. It’s a good quality in a person to be able to appreciate how it’s difficult to be someone else.
Dont take the approach serious. If you treat chatting up women like a game and keep it light hearted, youd be surprise with the results.
@@poindextersheelturn436 you mean like having an ordinary conversation that goes no where because they think you're unattractive?
@@cwill6491 Or they will put you in their friend zone.
It is very reassuring to hear that younger ladies want to preserve traditional values. I'm an older male that still believes in chivalry, dignity, respect and civility. Unfortunately I am widowed after 27 years.
Courtney you and your friend are amazingly knowledgeable for young ladies in your age group.
I would also like to add for anyone that reads this, physical attraction is nice but also understand that couples should also be able to be friends. Friendship is the core of all beautiful lasting relationships.
Thank you ladies 🙏
Recently started approaching random people and then moved on to chicks i wanted to get to know. Let me tell you its not like climbing a mountain guys, its more like stepping up onto the curb. Most people even if they dont feel like talking will be respectful if you are. Like Courtney said just say something that makes sense and be chill. GL out there.
Sounds interesting. Can you tell me more about your experiences?
@@johnv7968 hey, thats quite broad of a question but the first thing that came to mind was the more interested i was in others the more the were interested in me. A smile and genuine interest goes a long way.
Last year I wanted to improve on myself even more. I had to cut some people out of my life. Doesn't mean I'm not friends with them, but I don't seek them out as much. And then finding positive strengthening encouragement to add. Those things have helped me so much. Hopefully it helps you as well. Thank you Courtney for another great video.
Thank you for sharing this ❤️
do not base a relationship on a physical connection. kids will come. that changes everything. think of a relationship as cake with ingredients of companionship, sharing and building life experiences and enriching each others time with each other. intimacy is the icing on the cake.
Hey, I actually said this to myself years ago. You stole my analogy! Lol! 😆
I think you don't have to be with someone who doesn't appreciate you for who you really are, I LOVE YOU COURTNEY!!!
Courtney, the paying for the date portion by itself isn't really what guys have a problem with. The REAL problem guys have is the expectation from women that they pay for the first date. It represents an entitled type behavior, not to say that you are entitled, but Matthew in his video was correct. That is telling a guy that "you have to pay to have my time" and that represents a bad image in the guy's mind about the girl. That's why a lot of guys have a problem with that paying question.
Another reason why guys don't wanna pay nowadays is because a lot of women take advantage of this for a free meal or to take their mind off of an ex or because she's bored, and they use the guy for his wallet and never have any intention of taking him seriously. It's the same thing as guys just using women for their body and then ghosting them. Men don't wanna be used. If we are going to spend our money on a girl, we wanna know damn well that she actually genuinely cares about us.
Another thing I want to say is that I don't necessarily agree with you when you say that if the guy doesn't pay fully that means he's not into you. I have come to notice is that some guys don't pay for the full first date to guage the behavior of the woman that is in front of them. Because you don't know what type of woman they are, so you don't know if they are worthy of being in a relationship with. This is just one way of guys finding out.
Look at this video from Darius M and it'll explain it perfectly:
ruclips.net/video/CF-V-pgr0GU/видео.html
@Jay Bee But that's the thing, what makes you think that you are entitled to a man's wallet? That's what men hear every time a woman complains that a guy doesn't pay fully for them. Especially on a first date. We don't know you. We don't know if ur relationship material or not, and most importantly we don't know if your taking us seriously or if ur just using us for our money. And yet you still think that you're entitled to being paid fully for? That's a privilege that only a girlfriend or wife has, AFTER she proves she's worthy of that treatment. Guys have to start off low investment until the WOMEN starts proving that she's taking us seriously. That's when guys think it is safe to spend more on a woman, when they are sure that she is serious about them, not before. And another thing, a bunch of guys do pay fully and they still don't get relationships from women so that's not a very accurate statement.
The reason why the question of "should men pay on the first date", is polarizing, is because the the social narrative now, is female empowerment, and "equal rights, and opportunity", and "I'm a queen, treat me like one". Men see it as, "you want "equal", you got it sweetheart, you can pay for your own dinner". This is just my own observation. It's the "expectation", that turns men off.
Just don’t follow it. It’s only the narrative because we allow it to be
Hook up culture was a shock to me, i was married throughout all my 20s, and then single at 33, I was on straight survival mode. Took me some time to adapt and figure out how to navigate. Still, I prefer the traditional way of meeting people and forming a relationship. Social media kills authenticity.
stalking?
It looks like the "who pays on the first date" is a big topic today due to the Matthew Hussey video. I had 3 other content creators on my feed talk about the same video/topic.
Most men enjoy providing and I actually like the tradition of men paying for the first date as it sets the right tone - e.g., masculine/feminine polarity
If the woman paid for the first date, that's fine too but it sets the tone of the woman being the "provider" (whether that's actually the case or not), and IMO is not a good way to start a relationship because it initiates the wrong sexual dynamic.
All this being said, many modern women have learned to take advantage of this tradition so they can get free meals and experiences, so totally understand why many modern men are refusing to pay for dates.
Spot on with this comment, per usual!
"Most men enjoy providing and I actually like the tradition of men paying for the first date as it sets the right tone - e.g., masculine/feminine polarity"
What do you feel men should expect from women, to contribute to that polarity, that isn't expected also expected of men?
@@Youttubeuser20932 Be feminine during that date, allow the man to lead and take you around, don't try to emasculate him and "show who's boss".
It's insane how much power and influence women could have if they just embraced femininity instead of trying to compete with men using masculinity.
Women trying to compete with men in a man's domain (testosterone, aggression, masculinity, ambition, boldness) is like a cheetah trying to outlift a gorilla. Sure, maybe the strongest cheetah can outlift the absolute weakest and most frail gorilla in the world, but why compete in that domain when the cheetah can simply outrun ALL gorillas?
If a man won't pay that tells you what your worth is....
This has been a hot topic LONG before that Matthew Hussey video. His video is likely just putting it to the mainstream. The topic of who should pay on the first date has been brewing for years alongside the growth of feminism and the conversation surrounding “gender equality”. It likely came to a head when men started to realize that said talk of “equality” was/is only present when it’s convenient for women and only in the areas that they want. It’s very curious how dating is the one area where everything must remain traditional yet everything else can be “modern”.
With that said, we as men do want to provide. But only to women who show that they RESPECT and APPRECIATE said provision and most importantly respond with feminine reciprocity. Which speaks to the end of your comment where you mention how modern women have weaponized tradition in order to get free meals/experiences. This is what birthed the question of “who should pay on the first date?” men finally getting fed up with being used.
I've made a lot of mistakes when dating, watched too much red pill stuff.. but finally here's a channel that gives the right advice. Even your voice has a reassurance about it that it will work out.. thank you.
I could look at Alexa all day every day and that would be a good sight. She's an Angel!
Wonderful to see two CLASSY ladies together. I'd pay every date. I'm 50.
I hate that chivalry seems to be dying. Love to you both xx vin
Alexa Lee , the way you glance at the camera is unbelievable. Amazing eyes and smile
Respectfully, my time is not worth less than a woman's time. Paying for a first date should be something I choose to do, not something I should be expected to do. It's not about the money. It's about the principle.
Agree. Paying for dates is an outdated norm born of a time when many women literally weren't allowed to work and provide for themselves; the man had to pay for the date to be possible! No longer true. Additionally, with the proliferation of the Internet and modern smartphones, people are now primarily meeting as strangers on neutral ground rather than going out with people they're already acquainted with. It's one thing to pay for a friend, whose company you already know you enjoy and who may feel an obligation to accept your invite for relationship maintenance even if they don't like or can't afford the activity in question, than to pay for a stranger who is accepting for their own personal benefit and there for the exact same reasons you are.
I have it written in my dating profile that I don't pay for the first date. I get more hate messages than I do actual dates, but I need to know that you're coming on a date with me because you actually like me and you see me as more than a "free meal."
As you wrote above it's not about the money itself, it's the principle of the exchange. The tradition of men paying for the first date was because the woman often didn't have a job of her own and the man had the expendable income to pay for two people. Times have changed and the majority of women are in the work force. She can argue that women make 78 cents per every dollar a man makes but that's still 78 cents more than 2, 3 and 4 generations ago when women in the workforce was an anomaly. I think having the woman pay for her own dinner on date 1 is a good way to weed out the gold diggers and not waste a man's time. And it's the fairest exchange where the only real sacrifice you're making is the time investment for both parties involved.
@@SeemsLogical I like that idea. I think the drawback though, is that women’s dating expectations are so warped, that using a filtering method like that will dry up what little interest the average guy would get in the first place (as evidenced by okcupid’s data and numerous anecdotal profile swaps).
@@philosopherking506 Oh it's very effective at filtering out women who never had any intention of committing to me in the first place! I may be alone for longer but it saves me from wasting time on a bad woman and missing out on a good woman who I may have missed an opportunity with because I was trying to make things work with a bad woman. Reasonable women are rare but I'd rather hold out for one of those than settle for a woman who will not respect me as a human being.
@@philosopherking506 I will die alone before I compromise my principles.
Gonna die alone because 90% of women are already pre-filtering me for being short and I can't get a date to save my life anyway, but that's aside the point.
If someone is putting you down for trying to be a better you I have a couple words I like to say to them…. “Kick rocks”. No one deserves to be put down and if someone is doing that they shouldn’t be in your life
I really appreciate the positivity and respectful viewpoints from your videos. Its nice to get genuine advice from someone who encourages self respect as well as self assessment. Thank you for promoting such a healthy outlook to the dating world, I'm glad i found your videos.
I’m glad you’re here! ❤️ thanks for the kind comment
Excited to hear your advice on approaching, that’s the thing I struggle with more than anything else!
It’s tough! Hope this helps!
@@CourtneyRyan Thanks so much!!
pickup is easy asf dating is another story
The fancy restaurant first date is still in most peoples mind of the real date. I had girls tell me I needed to pay for an Italian restaurant first date in college when I worked at Cracker Barrel. I wouldn’t have been able to eat for a week after that! I still say even if you can afford it, it’s not really the best environment to get to know someone.
You can blame Hollywood for that.
Great advice and thank you. On the first one, and every relationship where one person is just ready for more and the other does not want to change for some reason... not ready or whatever the reason is...one thing they could do is pray for the other person. I heard from a friend of mine I respect deeply (she is now about 55 and I am a 70 year old man and this was 20 years ago) that she likes to envision the other person being happy and on stage at a podium. I think it was a technique she learned from somewhere. The result I think was that very quickly any bad images we may have of a person which could contribute something less than constructive, are dissolved and our mind naturally goes on once we have success at wanting what is best for others regardless of what they may have done or said to us and that we may have blamed them for. The way I approach ill feelings of others is reminding myself that the whole world needs love and that this person is the exact remedy for that situation or for all people to receive love again by my loving them as their creator does. Or, if more in line, what their mother and father should have given them from birth. That of course is only unconditional love. No farmer would plant seeds in tainted soil, so all people only need to be exposed to unconditional love to grow properly and mature completely. Where does that come from ? For me it came from this book and its writer that a trusted friend recommended to me 48 years ago. Maybe it could have value to a person reading this one day. www.tparents.org/Library/Unification/Books/DP06/0-Toc.htm Thank you for reading my comment.
“What can I do to not come off creepy?” Be better looking. Period. End of sentence.
Rule #1: Be attractive
Rule #2: Don't be unattractive.
Treu point. But see how they dance around this subject like the women they are. They just can't be honnest and say if your ugly stay away.
Sad but true
@@ricklewis7947 That was a great SNL sketch. It should be mandatory viewing for all young men.
It's 100% true. There's multiple videos of two guys going out, one ugly, one hot. They say the same things and see the reactions of the women, and the attractive guy can get away with almost anything.
I'll say something to add to it though, the way a woman reacts to and lets down the ugly men seriously puts on display the contents of their character. High quality feminine women don't put men on blast for shooting their shot. It is almost like some women are self conscious and think ugly men asking them out lowers their social status if these men think they have a chance with the woman. Not to mention verbally attacking a man in public is a masculine trait.
Alexa Lee has contagious energy on Cleveland TV , bravo!
It's proper etiquette for the person who invites the other on a date usually pays, however, they could always go " dutch" & " split" the bill!...Pretty simple! Nobody feels obligated or " owns" the other!... A date should not involve any " pressure!" It's a fact finding adventure to determine if there's a spark, chemistry and a connection! Never any high expectations from either individual...When you start the" right" way... you end the "right way!"...Period...
Alexa Lee is back 😊
She’s such a gem! ❤️
What is instagram!😂
This two women are freaking drop down gorgeous
Always great to see another of your clips, especially with Alexa Lee. She's very empathetic and positive.
Edit: As a guy, I'm really not into the whole hook up culture either. Hope I'm not the only one.
That's really nice to hear. I hate hook-up culture. It's why I'm not on any dating apps.
I like listening to you and Alexa advice. alexa comes across as a classy, intelligent person.
The double team works wonders. Thank you Courtney!
Courtney, you are such an intelligent individual. I just wanted you to know that. Keep up the good work.
Alexa is amazing! I really miss her on Channel.3. She is the only one of your guests that actually gives true advice. Her thoughts are truly genuine and insightful. Please invite more women on that are thoughtful with their words. Great video!
Men should not be expected to pay on dates, even if its just a coffee because it's not about the money, it's about the message it's sending. The message is you're more valuable than me so I'm going to pay for you.
That being said as a guy I usually do offer to pay at least on the first date because I'm happy to do so IF I like her but if the girl then doesn't even offer once to pay, that's a red flag because it's the entitlement and the expectation of it that irks me. And if I ever do suggest we split the bill and it bothers her, that's a red flag too.
It's true, you become the average of the 5ppl you spend the most time with. Losers lose and winners keep learning+improving&winning. This is why Courtney has such great guests; ladies with wisdom and manners, just like RUclips's favorite big sis!
Road to 2M!
You’re the best, Joseph! I appreciate your support and kind words more than you know 🥰
Bruh I'm 31 and Courtney is still my big sis ❤️
I find it more compelling to make promises to others rather than myself. Promises to myself, if I break them or fail, well, I figure "it's just me" and no one else is affected, so there is less pressure. But if it's for other people, there's more pressure not to fail or flake out. I would feel worse letting others down than letting myself down. I guess it depends on what motivates you. As long as whatever way gets the best results, there is no wrong way.
I love when women appreciate my strength of remembering their names, even if I say it to every woman I meet.
The best approach I ever did was:
In an office building (long time ago), an attractive woman was with 3 men in their business suits walking into a lift. I made up my mind, I walked up and put my hand on the door so it wouldnt close. I was fake talking on my phone (as if I was busy). I looked at the woman, handed my business card to her and in the same moment said: "Your stunning" and then I took my hand off the door and left.
She called me that night.
Her advice to men about their terrible situations is great. Her advice on how to meet women at the gym is exactly like Patrice Oneill says, It's like asking a fish how they want to be fished.
Thanks for covering the approaching in public subject. I need to get out of my shell on that one.
Give your shell to a cold, naked crustacean and enjoy the freedom of being Jeff!
I feel strongly about the last question. It's not about masculinity, it's about fairness. Just because the both of you think guys should pay doesn't mean that's how everyone sees it and goes to show how oblivious you are to foreign affairs. In some cultures, they either go half or pay their fair share, even on the first dates or meeting. They want to be seen as equal so offering to pay on their behalf can come across as offensive and is a turn off. The women I'm going for are from a country where gender equality is huge and they are turned off by a guy who offers to pay for the first dates. In fact, "dates" here actually feel more like casual hangouts.
You said it yourself, the first date is meant to get to know each other, but you've also said if a guy offers to go half, you just assume he's not into you when that's not always necessarily the case. There's always a reason behind everything so how did you reach that conclusion? Maybe it's not in his culture, but cultural differences don't stop international couples which are rising. Paying on a turn-by-turn basis will likely result in the girl abusing it by waiting long enough until the guy forgets and he's always the one paying.
This whole "chivalrous" thing is so stupid to me and an insult to those of us who are gender equality supporters. We don't live in those times anymore and gender equality is growing. The definition of chivalry combines a bunch of traits but one is "readiness to help the weak"...you're basically indirectly signaling women as weak by paying for them. Traditionalist women are typically the ones who take advantage of men, expecting to get things for free, but where do you draw the line? When you get to the root of the question: what makes a guy paying for the first date masculine? Answer that. If you can't, it proves how stupid this whole thing is, following a tradition without understand its origin. Traditions are fine when there's no harm to it, but in this case there is...to men
Surprisingly! I is gold! Thank you Ladies.
I absolutely love this piece! Thank you Courtney for this one. 👍
I just find it interesting how guys have to put themselves out there and go out of their way to do all the work . Meanwhile, women do what exactly? Just wait around while we have to approach them, take them out on dates, entertain them?
I feel that, I think men should approach most of the time but it goes both ways and we shouldn’t have to put in all the work to get a relationship going, today dating world is ridiculous
Yes, and that’s how it’s always been.
I approach alot of men even get their number then it's up to you men to lead because we love that, so as a woman I was taught not to approach etc but in the last year I changed that..but as soon as I a woman take the lead then I sit back and want you to plan then nothing happens..so now I still approach but if a man can't set up a date after that I leave it, but we are all just so confused because my gosh we have these relationship gurus telling woman a bunch of bullshit.
@@Joebyron72 nah dude.....women USED to chase too 😂
@@Didi-fr5ic you still want us to do the majority of work.....
I always plan to pay, no matter if it's first date or not. I was raised to always bring enough to pay for everyone, even if it's a double date, a group outing etc.
then you, sir, were raised to be a $lmp and I pity you
Comment to the poster
Hi there,
I have been watching a lot of videos like this on your channel and other people's channels as well (Not really looling for anything. I just like listening to the commentary). But after listening to many such commentaries, especially many about how difficult the dating scene is, I have formed an opinion of my own.
I have come to the conclusion that when it comes to dating many of us can be in a rush to find "THE ONE" (barring those who are just in it for the hook-up of course).
I think many try to start something out of thin air based solely on looks. That is generally why people ask for your number, because they think someone looks good then they automatically move to the date to try to get to know each other, which I think is a little backward and is how people end up feeling used on a date after it doesn't furnish the results they want.
I strongly believe it is better to try to get to know someone before date them romantically. We spend so much time trying to figure out if the person will like us based on whether they give us there number or allows us to text them that we forget to ask ourselves if we could like them as a person FIRST.
I think a healthier way to start any relationship (if you are really serious about it) is to just hang out with the person, just spend time with them AS a person. Get to know them as a person and a friend first. Learn their character. This way, once you ask for the date, you don't have to worry as much whether the person likes you or what their motivations for going out with you are. You'll know already and probably be able to enjoy the experience more. If things progress after that, it's just the icing on the cake.
It's an old fashioned concept, I know, and not one many are willing to practice, but for the person who is serious about finding someone, I think it could work.
I would love to get your opinion and feedback on in.
So nice to spend time with Alexa again. She's a wise and delightful human.
A comment or suggestion on the first message you read from the guy that wants to breakup with his girlfriend because of her putting him down. Yes, I agree it certainly should be done in person, however, it is probably prudent to have that conversation in a public place such as a restaurant, etc. We don't know the intricate details of that relationship or in what manner she is putting him down. Nonetheless, if her alleged behavior is driven by temper or an impulsivity issue, that conversation if done in private setting such as a residence, can take a bad turn. If so, then it escalates to a domestic issue involving law enforcement. In a public setting, there are witnesses. More importantly, either one can simply get up and walk away if the situation gets out of control. On the other end of the spectrum, a private setting such as a residence is conducive to "reconciliation" based things getting "heated" in a good way and the next day, he is back to square one. Nothing accomplished there. If there is some potential for reconciliation, that can start in a public place via a constructive conversation.
Courtney your a great woman your like that big sister/wing woman I’ve never had in my life thanks for your advice it seems like good insight. I love your guests too they seem wise and knowledgeable also have a good one keep up the good work girl
Sunday night 06 March 2022. Thanks for what you and Alexa do for us, Courtney. Awesome advise. Take care and all the best.
Here’s a tip for complimenting people in general: Don’t compliment something they were born with, compliment a choice they made. It’s shows you have a common mental ground that you can build from. If your approaching someone the physical attraction is assumed.
I agree, except getting compliments on stuff like my eyes feels really good. It feels personal and intimate
Gentlemen, for a first date, 1 drink, and an inexpensive activity where you can talk (if she proved that she isn't crazy)
Yup
Choose a coffee shop which also services alcohol.
I do not understand why men complicate this so much.
Charlie Sheen is my dating coach. He always tells me "always be a gentleman and pay for the date" I think he and I have different ideas as to what a date is but,the principal still applies.
Who brings the Tiger Blood?
Here's my unnuanced take on the whole split bill thing.
If there's going to be no 2nd date and you're going your separate ways from then on anyway, you should start by going your separate ways on the bill at that moment too.
If I pay on the first date is she going to put out on the first date? If she expects me to be traditional then I expect her to as well. I know a lot of people are going to say that If I invited her then I pay. That's great and all but the chances of her inviting me are slim to none.
That is why the first date should be on a boat in the middle of the ocean.
Because of the..."implication"....
@@CEWIII9873 Are you going to hurt these women?
@@Nero-Caesar Who said anything about "hurt?"
But, you know, it's the "implication..."
@@CEWIII9873 it's always sunny is the best show of all time
@@Nero-Caesar Agreed.
Some of my favorite memories in my life is watching these episodes for the first time.
For instance, the one where they think Mac is a serial ki ller, and at the end they remake To Catch a Predator.
I actually watched episodes where I focused only one character the entire time to see their actions and reactions.
Thanks for the dialogue, I like this format, also with someone that's not the same age who comes with perhaps a different perspective. I don't think women sympathise enough about how pricey it can get in a major city if you're dating around. I have certainly pulled away from meeting some matches on dating apps with the thought that it's getting too costly, so let's not do go on too many dates this month.
Hey Courtney thanks again for another wonderful vid.
I had my second date told her i was a dad which she took in shock.
Then she proceeded to say how she isn't feeling it with the vibes ( dont really know what that means) she is going on a holiday for a long weekend coming back sunday , whould it be that bad to ask her via a single text if she wants go give it one last shot after she comes back
jmo take the hint
she isnt interested, she said so, and is going away for a long weekend vacation where she will be hanging out with men she does like
so i think u are wasting your time
Great vid. Would love to see someone more older women's perspective. I'm interested in seeing their perspective.
Thank you! ❤️
True! She seems to have successfully and gracefully made it through the epiphany phase and remained elegant as a woman. Alexa should get into public speaking 💪
Go to your local bridge club
Yeah but Courtney a girl picked up a piece of paper that I dropped and it had a line on it. I told her that she was so sweet because she picked up my line. She couldn’t stop laughing!! Hahaha 🤣
Hookup culture is extremely dangerous. There’s been a study that proved the more sexual partners a person has, the lower the chances are that they can create a long term relationship. Basically, if a person has been having hookups/ casual relationship they are highly risky partners. Basically their choices disqualify them from having a normal romantic relationship
Alexa Lee just mesmerizes me!
I loving the evolution of your channel Courtney and the great advice as always. Keep up the great content you're a gem with genuine and wholesome views ❤️
Thank you, my friend! 🥰
I really identify with this guy because I had a similar experience and found out afterward why it all happened. I was in a relationship that was fantastic for 4 1/2 years. We were both in college, joined a work-out class to burn off our "happy weight" and we got into great shape. It was at this point where her criticism started. She became critical of every minute movement I made. It seemed like a tidal wave that had built up minutely without my notice, then became a never-ending torrent of negativity. We eventually broke up because "it just wasn't working out." I moved out and her professor moved in. It immediately became apparent that her negativity served two purposes: being critical of me reinforced to her that I was actually the terrible person she was making me out to be, thereby justifying her cheating. Secondly, her lashing out at me was a weakness, trying to make herself unpalatable in my eyes, attempting to push me to break up with her so that she could accept the break up and walk away with her new suitor, guilt free.
The professor had a wife and daughter, as well.
Overall, if she is treating you like garbage, it may be that she is trying to force you to break up with her so that she can be both the victim and the rescued.
(Abbreviated version. It was actually much worse)
P.S. I really like your guest's point that telling someone why you are ending the relationship can be a great learning opportunity for someone, especially if you do care about them.
that's horrible man, sorry u had to experience that
what happened was she lost weight, she looked better, got more attention from other men, more confidence, started finding u boring, the tingles had gone away and became argumentative so that u would leave her so she could be with the professor she wanted
it happens a lot, they lose weight, feel more confident, and cheat with the personal trainer or the co-worker/boss or professor that they feel is above you
Alexa Lee is a total knock out! Wow
Alexa started very nervous, you could tell; but then she got over it and did it well. I'd like to see her in other videos.
Great segment 👏 Segment.....LADIES....ADVICE....ESPECIALLY FO' age ranges.....25yrs....UPZ...
I had such a girlfriend, a psychotherapist, who pointed out all kinds of flaws. She ultimately dumped me, but I have been addressing those flaws. I'm pretty confident that the next one I find would really not have much to complain about. I talked to an internet dating guru for awhile also who basically convinced me that I'm a good catch and to quit worrying about what's wrong with me. What it seems to come down to for me is access. I live in a small town where the only available women are too young for me. Maybe I should move to the city where there are some Alexa Lee's around that I could meet!
Women are hypergamous according to red pill. Not your fault if she made more money than you since she is a therapist
Commenting on a girl's appearance in the gym is not ALWAYS bad. I find it works pretty well, if she's doing shoulder or back exercises, to give her praise for being well-built in those areas.
The point is to not compliment things out of their control, which is what you didn't do, so good for you. Just don't comment on things like their skin color, their eye color, how big their t*ts are or whatever since it can weird them out and get awkward.
I'm in my 40s and have paid for many first dates. I'm not doing that anymore, even though lots of those dates went on to become relationships. I think women need to realise that the final instalment of Feminism is arriving (guys will only split the check/ the draft bill presented to congress for women to be drafted to the military like men etc) She works and pays taxes like me, so why should I pay? It's really outdated now (and dont blame me, I was always happy to pay for a date if I asked a woman out, but not anymore) Also some women will use a guy for a free dinner, which is disrespectful, and I don't hear enough women calling them out on it. Many younger women seem to have a creeping sense on entitlement. Great discussion btw! 👍
Thought would make a suggestion on a video topic... "What women can learn from women with lots of guy friends."
Some of the most remarkable women and those men respect most I never hear about. As men it is always great to remind ourselves what high quality can be, even though we feel unworthy of it more often than not.
in the netherlands we dont really have clubs for anything I like....it sucks
I love boulder thats where I would go on my first date, used to live there such a beautiful suburb town lots of things to do and fun college atmosphere there!! Denver's great to but a cute little date is Where BOULDER is TAILORED made for that type of stuff!!
Hey Courtney, being a somewhat quiet and reserved guy, what topics should be brought up and talked about to keep the conversation going and keep in interesting? Also what not to bring up or talk about.
guys migrate into hookup culture when they think they have to pay for every date. and regrettably, broaching the subject of who pays for dates is a deal-breaker for girls, which means that they are not open to having that conversation and you are forced to guess or just make a decision for yourself and hope she is okay with it.
For larger context, the assumption that the guy should pay for the first date is the same as the assumption that a woman should sleep with a man by the end of the third date (a commonly held thought in some cultures/societies). All of these subjects should be up for conversation between the people directly involved in the date/relationship.
I think most women are cap. They say no cheesy lines. no corny lines; but sometimes that shyt works. It all depends on your approach and most of all, look. If shes attracted to u off the rip you can say just about anything. Ive seen friends use negging and rudeness and/or say corny lines and get the number. I, myself, have used cheesy lines on purpose to get that laugh and it work. If they find you appealing it doesn't matter what you say, just say with conviction and smoothness. Just don't be aggressive and ignorant. And most important, KNOW WHEN TO WALK AWAY.
If they are really into hookup culture they are bad relationship material. It’s hard not to just ghost on those types of individuals.
The Six Pillars of Self Esteem is one of the best books on the subject
Great insight except for the take on who pays for the first date. Didn’t hear any compelling reasons why the guy should pay or why the girl should not pay. I agree the first date shouldn’t be any place fancy. And yes if the first date goes well good women will often offer to cover the next date. The problem I have with paying for the first date is it sets the tone that you’re going to be the provider moving forward and I want a partner that can contribute to the relationship.
Alexa Lee is a glowing beauty 😍😍
If you had to choose between a gf that had 1 or 2 serious boyfriends and a gf that has been having fwb, ons and what not, which one would you pick and commit? It´s common sense at this point. And though I don´t have to worry about that if I had daughters I´d strongly advice against having boyfriends that had fwb, ons, you name it. Don´t hold high hopes for someone like that. If an employer had 2 candidates for hiring, will one of them say "it´s all in the past, my past doesn´t make me. That I was unemployed for 5 years and didn´t study anything meanwhile doesn´t mean that the guy that has been working and studying round the calendar is a better hiring. I´m awesome! I´m a catch!".
I'm curious about your thoughts on events/adventures for single people. I haven't heard you mention this as a way to meet someone.
Hey Courtney, question for you.. so I watched the portion of video talking about approaching in public, and I’ve never really had a problem with starting a conversation.. but how do I change the conversation from something causal, to more of a “can I get your number” sort of thing?
Have always had trouble transitioning the conversation to something more romantic as opposed to causal
@@NateGames You can always try the old "want to get some coffee?" line. She will know what that means.
It does still happen, Alexa. My ex and I used to have both passionate and fun connectivity (we'll call it). It's sad that after a while she felt she was standing in the way of me being happy, although I can understand now since throughout the majority of my exclusive relationships I've always been the one to put in the most effort. Year after year I become a better gentleman, and a better man, with energy and strength like I'm still 19, but hey, that's testosterone for ya 😂
You can help a woman's self confidence, but if you don't help the self worth issues, then she'll never feel worthy and release you back into the wild. Oh well. It just boosted my mental rigidity and self worth once I got over the whole breakup
As a man, I'm always paying for the first. My mindset is that I'm paying for all of them, as I like to lead. The ladies here are spot on about their advice though. Stay smooth fellow kings.
Love Your Content.
Thank you, Michael! ❤️
I am 50 years old man, married for 18, so these advices do not really apply to me, however, I am surprised about the approach culture. Seems to me that every year that pass by is harder and harder, being a gentleman sometimes can be consider creepy, you have to restraint to say a compliment, hold the door, offer the seat, etc.
I met my wife when I was 29, before that, I always paid for my dates, now I pay for my family expenses :D,. I passed to my son the same advice that my dad gave me when I started dating: Do you want a woman, well, work hard because they are expensive.
If *only* we could replace the countless entitled modern "men" with clones of you... thank you so much for being a gentleman and passing that on to your son!
Alexa has a great perspective.
Love your channel Courtney and you're usually spot on! However, I don't think either of you really understand why men have reached a breaking point with paying for first dates. It's because modern Western women (generally) have an unbelievable sense of entitlement and have no issue accepting a free meal even if they already decided internally that they have no romantic or sexual interest. You'd be amazed at how common this is. Only the top 1% of "High Value" men are able to avoid this. Also, feminist rhetoric constantly contradicts itself. Modern women claim they want equality but keep proving over and over again through action that they don't want equality...they want to keep the all the benefits that come with the territory of womanhood while simultaneously acquiring all the benefits that come with the territory of manhood, but without any of the responsibility or accountability....even in sharing responsibility of something as simple as a date. You either want equality across the board or you want traditional gender roles...it doesn't work both ways.
Very well put!
[crumples up my list of pick up lines specifically designed for various isles in Target and Target checkout lines]
Thanks a lot!
Best compliments for Alexa Lee..beautiful lady. but Courtney, same for you.