When I developed HOCD and POCD the thing that scared me the most apart from the groinal syndrome, was that I started to compulsively masturbate switching between gay and straight content trying to figure out what I liked, and whenever i finished out of my natural predilections I ended up so confused, with such strange feelings in my whole body, miserable, detached, ashamed. Life lost any meaning, I felt unclean and unable to be happy ever again. Masturbating to the groin syndrome is the worst feeling I've ever had, the most strange, sickening, self assaulting feeling, like I was loosing myself. Idk, I'm still on the way of recovery, life still feels meaningless,
I identity. If masturbation has become a default soothing technique, we can end up in one hell of a jumble. Again, we have to hope for progress on earlier and earlier diagnosis for people who suffer this condition.
You have the best personality... Your humor and silliness makes the information more digestible. You are a rock star in recovery and still so relateable and vulnerable. You are the best I’ve seen, you will go far with your work. Thank you for shinning the light for so many afraid of the dark. I’ve had OCD forever too. It’s important for others to see us veterans doing the work and getting better. I hate that we have to suffer so much, but it is not in vain, we are pioneers in search of peace. People like you are saving thousands of kids from suffering this chronic illness alone, and likely saving hundreds of lives along the way. Thank you for your service and warmth. 🤩
I want reassurance so bad it’s gotten to the point where I don’t know if i want to act on these urges or are they just intrusive thoughts I can’t even play games with kids younger than me - I’m 14
I know I have OCD and this is part of why I'm thinking of therapy, but my OCD is also like, "what if when you ask for OCD treatment, they ask how you found out you had OCD and self-diagnosing yourself doesn't count?"
Awesome video Chrissie. I am getting treatment atm and yes the biggest problem we do is keep checking and doubting. Our brain just wants that reasurrance. I am now learning to sit with the thoughts and try not to debate them. It is actually helping. Xx
I think the key to recovery for me is acceptance of what is. I am not my mind, beliefs and emotions. When we experience anxiety our brain produces risk assessment thoughts. That is just a protection mechanism of the brain that protects me from danger. All it can do is make me feel afraid and in case of a real danger take the appropriate action. A big one for me is realizing that I'm not the mind and that I don't need to be concerned by thoughts, beliefs and emotions. I'm the awareness that notices everything. I'm taking this on now and letting life flow. This week so has been a real game changer accepting this attitude :-) Being okay with a discomfort and just sitting with it helps too. It passes quickly when I don't give it any attention and importance.
This is so true. Especially when talking about emotions. I've noticed that the most difficult of compulsions to resist especially for sufferers of HOCD/POCD/ROCD is checking their emotional reactions to different triggers,thoughts of images. The logic goes " I must feel fear every time i am exposed to a trigger". But this almost always backfires. Because over time, the amount of fear subsides but the compulsions remain.For example a person with HOCD might check for feelings of attraction and after some time he might not feel fear or feel just a small anxious reaction, and can misinterpret that as "Oh no! This must mean i am attracted to this person, since that dreadful fear is gone". This is a classic cognitive distortion. OCD really CAN make you feel like you are attracted to something you don't like. Why? Because it knows it's your fear + you are hypervigilant about your emotions(you can't feel afraid all the time, emotions and feelings are not constant)+ your compulsions keep on feeding it. Emotions are NOT facts.
@@eldarpanther1513 thank u I really needed to hear this. I'm so confused because for the past few days I'm not feeling the huge fear I used to, and I was so scared if that might mean that I really feel attracted for my thoughts sorry for the english btw
Thanks for making this video. You didn't mention one thing I haven't thought at one point or another over the past year. I'm currently struggling to muster up the courage to seek ERP therapy because I'm so afraid they will tell me I don't have OCD and the thoughts are real. Knowing I'm not alone, I will admit, I find reassuring. But I also just find it comforting to know I'm not alone. I also like that you mentioned talk/psychotherapy are absolutely not adequate for treating OCD. I went to talk therapy for months and saw no results, in fact I got worse the further into therapy I went. It doesn't help that I actually mentioned to my therapist at the time that it might be OCD and they kind heartedly told me it wasn't. Well anyways, I should stop myself from writing more since writing these comments can quickly turn into a compulsion for me. Again, thanks so much for these videos.
I can really relate to this. I have experienced different types of ocd but this one is ruining my life. I like to think I'm a kind person I love animals and when my nan and grandad passed away I started getting thoughts of harm they went away for few years but came back really intensely last year and I lost a pair of sissors and now my brains convinced me I have hurt someone with them and because I can't find them it must be true :'( most of my family have stopped talking to me because they don't understand
@@zovi3363 Hey, I know its really really hard but you have to know you wouldn't worry so much if you're thoughts were a part of who you are. The fact that they distressing you is proof that they aren't real. OCD can make you take every thought and feeling seriously and it cam really throw you off. It does get better. Educating myself on this has helped mw deal with this lot better. Its definitely still hard but we can power through. Recovery isn't a linear line. It has its ups and downs. You're a good person, beautiful in and out and I pray that you find yourself in a much better place soon. Im sending you all my love and support amd I know you can do this. You're strong. You will overcome this.
I definitely will keep this one in mind. I haven't had a lot of experience with confessing as a compulsion, but I sure do work with people with peer support that do! I think this is a great topic I could tie into a video for sure. Thank you for the suggestion!
Which “suck” are you going to choose. Yup this was a great way of putting it and definitely made me feel ready for therapy. Thanks Chrissie, you’re a gem.
Hey Chrissie, I have these obsession on things I may or may not have said - I think that if I'd comment on something that is or feels very negative with a sentence like "this is the greatest feeling ever", that the negative thing becomes positive (because I said it) and I have to do these things because it made them positive - even though I feel it's negative. So the fear that my brain forces me to do something. It feels terrible...
I definitely do wish I could go back to the point before something happened to me when I was little though. I see my first psychologist tomorrow. Pocd made me not be social and introverted and self harming since I was 10, I'm an adult now. I'm ready to get better
One word of advice: I think talking of probabilities is dangerous. Because it can lead people to ruminate how likely or unlikely it is, that they've got ocd. Every reassurance needs to be thrown out of the window if one wants to recover.
I got this as a result of brain injury, so it really won’t work until my brain heals. I’m too disabled to access therapy. This isn’t an excuse it’s just my reality. I’ve done every thing during these compulsions to stop them. The thing I do the most is try to deflate their significance, ignore them, laugh at them, distract and it doesn’t work. It’s too entrenched in the brain injury. I get these urges and almost like mini black outs, so I just have to avoid life basically. Not going to endanger other people and myself.
im scared that when i get older ill start losing interest in boys (im straight) (im a girl) (lol) because i dont want to like girls and every time i hv the thoughts of what if i lose the attraction to boys it gets me soo uncomfortable and it gives me anxiety. And then when im not having these thoughts i have another uncomfortable thought of what if u accepted that ur gonna turn gay and just 😫😫 its soo disturbing to me. Can anyone else relate? or can u help me out i really need it..... these thoughts are killing me!!!!! 😫😖😭😭
what do you think of being scared that you will at least initially fail at erp because you need to do "one last" confession compulsion. This seems to keep me from starting treatment because "i won't be able to live without confessing that last thing"
Well I spent a lot of years masking the OCD, so when I do get intrusive thoughts, I'm pretty good about being able to hide it, but it sure is uncomfortable!
Just when you think you think ocd has asked you all the questions about yourself it always finds more ! Soo frustrating at times 😄
carlo baggio so freaking accurate! OCD “the great interrogator”
"Omg I don't have that symptom" yes this is me 100% Google is toxic but at the same time without it I would have never known what I was dealing with!
Very true!!!! The good and the ugly of google! haha!
When I developed HOCD and POCD the thing that scared me the most apart from the groinal syndrome, was that I started to compulsively masturbate switching between gay and straight content trying to figure out what I liked, and whenever i finished out of my natural predilections I ended up so confused, with such strange feelings in my whole body, miserable, detached, ashamed. Life lost any meaning, I felt unclean and unable to be happy ever again. Masturbating to the groin syndrome is the worst feeling I've ever had, the most strange, sickening, self assaulting feeling, like I was loosing myself. Idk, I'm still on the way of recovery, life still feels meaningless,
I identity. If masturbation has become a default soothing technique, we can end up in one hell of a jumble. Again, we have to hope for progress on earlier and earlier diagnosis for people who suffer this condition.
I too came for reassurance and realised when she said it .
im so confused and dont know what to feel or think or know whats real
lets cry together
Love Yourself wtf
Love Yourself Please don’t
@Love Yourself are your fears becoming straight?
this is exactly how I'm feeling rn. I don't even know if I really have OCD because I don't know anymore how to think and feel, I'm so confused
You have the best personality... Your humor and silliness makes the information more digestible. You are a rock star in recovery and still so relateable and vulnerable. You are the best I’ve seen, you will go far with your work. Thank you for shinning the light for so many afraid of the dark. I’ve had OCD forever too. It’s important for others to see us veterans doing the work and getting better. I hate that we have to suffer so much, but it is not in vain, we are pioneers in search of peace. People like you are saving thousands of kids from suffering this chronic illness alone, and likely saving hundreds of lives along the way. Thank you for your service and warmth. 🤩
I want reassurance so bad it’s gotten to the point where I don’t know if i want to act on these urges or are they just intrusive thoughts I can’t even play games with kids younger than me - I’m 14
How are you now
Omg for real its soo terifying
I know I have OCD and this is part of why I'm thinking of therapy, but my OCD is also like, "what if when you ask for OCD treatment, they ask how you found out you had OCD and self-diagnosing yourself doesn't count?"
Did you go? Hope you're doing better.
Awesome video Chrissie. I am getting treatment atm and yes the biggest problem we do is keep checking and doubting. Our brain just wants that reasurrance. I am now learning to sit with the thoughts and try not to debate them. It is actually helping. Xx
Im afraid that this is not ocd and its just me trying to believe that it is
I think the key to recovery for me is acceptance of what is. I am not my mind, beliefs and emotions. When we experience anxiety our brain produces risk assessment thoughts. That is just a protection mechanism of the brain that protects me from danger. All it can do is make me feel afraid and in case of a real danger take the appropriate action. A big one for me is realizing that I'm not the mind and that I don't need to be concerned by thoughts, beliefs and emotions. I'm the awareness that notices everything. I'm taking this on now and letting life flow. This week so has been a real game changer accepting this attitude :-) Being okay with a discomfort and just sitting with it helps too. It passes quickly when I don't give it any attention and importance.
This is so true. Especially when talking about emotions. I've noticed that the most difficult of compulsions to resist especially for sufferers of HOCD/POCD/ROCD is checking their emotional reactions to different triggers,thoughts of images. The logic goes " I must feel fear every time i am exposed to a trigger". But this almost always backfires. Because over time, the amount of fear subsides but the compulsions remain.For example a person with HOCD might check for feelings of attraction and after some time he might not feel fear or feel just a small anxious reaction, and can misinterpret that as "Oh no! This must mean i am attracted to this person, since that dreadful fear is gone". This is a classic cognitive distortion. OCD really CAN make you feel like you are attracted to something you don't like. Why? Because it knows it's your fear + you are hypervigilant about your emotions(you can't feel afraid all the time, emotions and feelings are not constant)+ your compulsions keep on feeding it.
Emotions are NOT facts.
@@eldarpanther1513 thank u I really needed to hear this. I'm so confused because for the past few days I'm not feeling the huge fear I used to, and I was so scared if that might mean that I really feel attracted for my thoughts
sorry for the english btw
Commenting on the video - also one terrible fear: fear that therapy could have worked in the past but that now it is too late for you
Thanks for making this video. You didn't mention one thing I haven't thought at one point or another over the past year. I'm currently struggling to muster up the courage to seek ERP therapy because I'm so afraid they will tell me I don't have OCD and the thoughts are real. Knowing I'm not alone, I will admit, I find reassuring. But I also just find it comforting to know I'm not alone.
I also like that you mentioned talk/psychotherapy are absolutely not adequate for treating OCD. I went to talk therapy for months and saw no results, in fact I got worse the further into therapy I went. It doesn't help that I actually mentioned to my therapist at the time that it might be OCD and they kind heartedly told me it wasn't. Well anyways, I should stop myself from writing more since writing these comments can quickly turn into a compulsion for me.
Again, thanks so much for these videos.
I can really relate to this. I have experienced different types of ocd but this one is ruining my life. I like to think I'm a kind person I love animals and when my nan and grandad passed away I started getting thoughts of harm they went away for few years but came back really intensely last year and I lost a pair of sissors and now my brains convinced me I have hurt someone with them and because I can't find them it must be true :'( most of my family have stopped talking to me because they don't understand
OCD can do that stuff man... get a counselor and know your gonna be ok
I hope you're doing okay
@@jessicapinto5397 hi thank you for reaching out i am in a pretty bad place at a lose
@@zovi3363 Hey, I know its really really hard but you have to know you wouldn't worry so much if you're thoughts were a part of who you are. The fact that they distressing you is proof that they aren't real. OCD can make you take every thought and feeling seriously and it cam really throw you off. It does get better. Educating myself on this has helped mw deal with this lot better. Its definitely still hard but we can power through. Recovery isn't a linear line. It has its ups and downs. You're a good person, beautiful in and out and I pray that you find yourself in a much better place soon. Im sending you all my love and support amd I know you can do this. You're strong. You will overcome this.
@@zovi3363 have you reached out to a mental health professional?
can you do a video on real event ocd or confession compulsions? that's what triggered my intrusive thoughts and i feel like i'm exempt because of that
I definitely will keep this one in mind. I haven't had a lot of experience with confessing as a compulsion, but I sure do work with people with peer support that do! I think this is a great topic I could tie into a video for sure. Thank you for the suggestion!
Yes! Real Event OCD is a major topic in support groups now.
Yes!!! Real event OCD please!
Your videos really help. The job you’re doing is incredible, keep raising awareness, you’re doing ana amazing job!
thanks so much!! I just came across your channel after being diagnosed last weekend. Thanks, ugh i cant thank you enough for making these videos!
Which “suck” are you going to choose. Yup this was a great way of putting it and definitely made me feel ready for therapy. Thanks Chrissie, you’re a gem.
I love your video's, so great that you dare to be so open about these things
Rose Blue, absolutely! She is doing a really good job 👍
I see this similar to schizophrenia as the thoughts come and go...
love your laughter
Hey Chrissie, I have these obsession on things I may or may not have said - I think that if I'd comment on something that is or feels very negative with a sentence like "this is the greatest feeling ever", that the negative thing becomes positive (because I said it) and I have to do these things because it made them positive - even though I feel it's negative. So the fear that my brain forces me to do something. It feels terrible...
How are you now?
@@sr.jumped9110 much better
@@alr.3137 really? Am struggling a lot right now like theres no hope, can you tell me what you did?
@@sr.jumped9110 You can write me on IG ar_ryder
I definitely do wish I could go back to the point before something happened to me when I was little though. I see my first psychologist tomorrow. Pocd made me not be social and introverted and self harming since I was 10, I'm an adult now. I'm ready to get better
i love the random banana in the frame
LMAO so true I love you dude thanks for this. I trust you
i wish u were my therapist
I have schizophrenia but I also get these thoughts. Do I also have OCD or is it the schiziphrenia?
This video is so helpful ❤
One word of advice: I think talking of probabilities is dangerous. Because it can lead people to ruminate how likely or unlikely it is, that they've got ocd. Every reassurance needs to be thrown out of the window if one wants to recover.
I got this as a result of brain injury, so it really won’t work until my brain heals. I’m too disabled to access therapy. This isn’t an excuse it’s just my reality.
I’ve done every thing during these compulsions to stop them. The thing I do the most is try to deflate their significance, ignore them, laugh at them, distract and it doesn’t work. It’s too entrenched in the brain injury.
I get these urges and almost like mini black outs, so I just have to avoid life basically. Not going to endanger other people and myself.
I’d highly recommend therapy with someone who is an ocd specialist if I haven’t yet. Hope u get better :)
im scared that when i get older ill start losing interest in boys (im straight) (im a girl) (lol) because i dont want to like girls and every time i hv the thoughts of what if i lose the attraction to boys it gets me soo uncomfortable and it gives me anxiety. And then when im not having these thoughts i have another uncomfortable thought of what if u accepted that ur gonna turn gay and just 😫😫 its soo disturbing to me. Can anyone else relate? or can u help me out i really need it..... these thoughts are killing me!!!!! 😫😖😭😭
Me too in I'm a guy your not alone
Jonathan coleman thank you ♥️♥️
How are you doing now? I also struggle with hocd
This is a year old, but I have this fear too!! 😭 Even if my anxiety isn't so bad, the thoughts are still there.
@@rebornlove1324 still strugling to this day💖
what do you think of being scared that you will at least initially fail at erp because you need to do "one last" confession compulsion. This seems to keep me from starting treatment because "i won't be able to live without confessing that last thing"
Could be a baby goose with an interesting accent, as a wise OCD gremlin once said RE walking and talking like a duck
You remind me of my aunt xD thanks for all you do
Loved this thank you
How do your face look like during the odd attack? And do you do it in public?
Well I spent a lot of years masking the OCD, so when I do get intrusive thoughts, I'm pretty good about being able to hide it, but it sure is uncomfortable!
Chrissie Hodges/Pure OCD Advocate what if other people notice what's there reaction?
Great-thanks!!!
Thank you !!!
i fucking love u omg
Pleassseee tell me your in Atlanta