I just want to thank all of you guys for showing me so much support here. I really appreciate all the comments. I read every single one and I have received a lot of good advice. I, of course, have to choose my own path, but it helps to know the impact I've made on so many people's lives. I wish there were an easy answer, but this is a struggle I just have to work through and when the time comes I will know exactly what to do. Thank you all.
Much respect for sharing this video, brother. It takes a lot of courage to open up about struggles and I appreciate your bravery in sharing your story. Keep up the great work! 👍
One reason I've stuck with you all these years, while unsubscribing many others, is you have for the most part been genuine/real/vulnerable with us. I can't say how much you've impacted my life in a positive way and helped me see through all the pill colors. I agree, you will get through this rough patch and give us some tips that helped you through. The value you give is more meaningful as you stay real. Thank you sir!
As a 30 year old man who doesnt have his life together, anything you create that helps me put it together for free through the internet is amazing and will keep me subscribed.
This is the second video that I saw, you are down/rant. Then I have seen you come back better. This is a huge motivation for us and it helps us. This is video is way better than any of the other personal development/coaching videos out there in any channel, as all we see are their good times. What you show us here is the reality. This is very unique and uplifting to everyone. Probably one of the best videos I have seen in decades.
Come unto me, all ye that Labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
Listen to me John, lemme tell you something honest here, this is your "best" video so far, literally. I need to bookmark this somewhere! Lemme give you an honest perspective from someone who's been consuming your content since 2017. I was among the very first who bought your book "the complete software development career guide" and among those who watched every video of Simple Programmer channel. So here's my point : 1. I tent to have in so many times, as an alpha, the same feeling that you're having right now. And what I do? I used to be harsh on myself and try to have that bulldog mindset, and feel ashamed if I ever got that state of mind again. However, seeing you doing this kind of ranty form is really really helpful to me, to us, to feel that it's totally okay to crush sometimes and feel bad about ourselves. 2. You're one of the very few people who influenced my 20s, seriously! The content that I really enjoyed and learned a lot from is: carrer development, decipline (project management, pomodoro, and that stuff), and masculanity. 3. Finally, I wanna say thank you for sharing such an honest view about yourself and personality. We all tend to go thought it, especially as alpha males. You fucking rock John. Can't wait for your next video in whatever you find meaningful to you. Much love & respect.
John, you are a gift to all of us. Your content - including this video - has helped more people than you will ever realize. My gut feeling is that helping geeks get girlfriends is not work that will fulfill you. I believe you have grown beyond that and are at a point where you can offer wisdom, deeper philosophy and life lessons to the world. Think about it. Much love to you
@@krisgiovanetti That’s a fair point, Kris. I also think anyone who wants to address the need to help men discover who they are as men so they can put themselves out there in the marketplace in an attractive manner is not something you can grow beyond. Especially considering how impactful this area is and will be for the rest of one’s life.
@krisgiovanetti i agree with you, and to me that is the thing that he does the best i mean his date and financial advice are really good, but the videos that have deep philosophy, life lessons and wisdom are life changing and you can't find it in another RUclips channel out there, this is high quality wisdom that i just can find in john's content.
About me: autism, 46 years old, software developer, basically a virgin, interested in Stoicism, interested in masculinity, running once a week, bodypump twice a week, own a house, cold showers, bitterness is holding me back I know the way out is gratefulness; maybe you could do a video on fighting bitterness, a few women were interested in me who smoked cigarettes but that was a deal breaker
46 and a virgin? Now I feel grateful that I've hooked up with almost 20 chick's and I'm in my early 20s. I was starting to feel bad because I got over the Hookup culture and I just want a feminine woman who's all about me. I see there are guys out there who got it worse. I will give you some advice though, look into red pill and game techniques. This will help you get some of those hook up culture chick's. It's harder to get a nurturing sweet feminine woman which is what I'm struggling with now. Those traumatized chick's that red pill techniques work on are easy to get. Don't put them on a pedestal
Even the ones that you think are decent feminine women, most will end up betraying you given the opportunity in their minds in the long run. Only way around that is if you're just that much better than her and she knows it every day. Only way she'll want to keep a man.
I would say find places you can meet more women that share your interests but coding is very male dominated so it's not impossible but rare. Just finding groups and social places meeting people naturally and developing relationships that way as opposed to dating sites, that worked for me
We all appreciate the honesty. Let me relieve any anxiety you might have about “not being the guy you tell others to be” right now. Everyone understands that no one practices what they preach 100% of the time. That said: I read your book, followed it, and became a dev. Your sh!t works. What you do is valuable. It rescued me and gave me a life. The struggle for me now isn’t getting a girlfriend specifically , it’s building real life social connections. I’m in a new city and have realized how hard it is to meet new people as a grown male. I also feel like this is a pretty universal problem among males in 2023. I feel like if you could focus on one thing that would be valuable now, it would be how to network and how to build authentic connections with people. If you have that skill then everything from money to women comes easily.
I’m tryna prepare myself for the real life instead of wasting time and neglecting my health. I was trying to please a crowd that didn’t give a fuck about me
I just love the honesty, it takes a lot to come on camera and tell us your feelings and struggles. Well done John, I am following you since simple programmer and your videos changed my life 5 years ago when I hit my worst. It seems to me that you are looking to be aligned with your purpose, you genuinely want to make an impact. You don’t need perfect edited videos to make an impact on our lives, you are doing right now!Since my life transformation back in 2018 I have felt like you from times to times, wanting to go back to my golden era, when I made the most progress in life and that I saw myself as a bulldog. I can really relate but what helps me is never give up, keep on showing up even tho it is not perfect. At some point the light will switch back and you will get out of the cave. Wish you well!
Honestly, man, this is exactly the video I needed to watch. It resonated with me and gave me some insights on what I need to do in my own life. It takes guts to publish this kind of stuff, so well done!
My 2 cents, as someone who just passed 50... All the way through my 40's, I was unstoppable. I would literally work 100+ hour weeks for months and even years on end. Three degrees, 4 professional certifications, numerous businesses. Informally educated in dozens of more subjects. I used to workout literally every day of the week. When I was single, even into my 40's, I would have a rotation of women that sometimes hit double-digits. I've travelled to almost 50 countries and done a lot of cool stuff. It wasn't that many years ago that I worked a demanding full-time job in one profession, while simultaneously building a business in an entirely different discipline, and still found time to volunteer, chase women, travel, and stay fit, not to mention all the mundane tasks that keeps it all functioning. My point... I don't have that level of drive and energy today. I have literally marveled out loud to people over the past year or two that I have no idea where I found the time and energy to do all of that. Don't get me wrong, I probably still achieve more in a year than the average person in their 20's and 30's. I still travel and run 2 different businesses. I spend hours a day learning and yes, still find time to hit the weights or the treadmill, though not as regularly. To an outsider, I probably look like I'm still killin' it, but to me, I see the difference. I miss the me from 10 years back, but I've had to make my peace that a bit slower pace is just the season of life I'm in. I haven't achieved even half of what I still want to do, but I am resigned to the fact that it might just have to happen at a slower pace. One other thought... do you think having a steady partner now is correlated to the changes? I've never had a shortage of women coming into my life, so the single periods were busy times. However, I often moved into a relationship after 6 months of the single life. Part of it was the abundance of women allowed me to identify one that was worth committing to. The other part was that dating that many women is a full-time job in itself, so having only one to worry about was a time-saving technique that allowed me to get back to productive pursuits. The current GF has been around for a number of years so was part of that transition from the 40's to the 50's. She is much younger than I am, so I imagine she keeps me young as well. That all said, I do see a correlation in my own life between the years in the current relationship and the "decline" in my own tenacity and productivity. In some ways being in a relationship should free up time, and I'm sure in my case it does. I haven't done any housework in years, and I'm no longer entirely sure just where in the house the kitchen is, but it must still be there as a steady supply of food does issue forth. I can literally get up and spend every waking moment doing something that moves the needle, yet it seems that less gets done than the days when I had to change the sheets and run the vacuum between visitors. Anyway, I will be interested to see what you come up with John! Maybe we will both get back in touch with our most hardcore selves.
John I appreciate your honesty. I foubd your channel 3 years ago and I started watching your videos on mindset and confidence, those are my favorites. In fact, you were an inspiration to start transforming my body and my life in general. I have lost 40 kg in the last two years, I was finally able to approach women I liked, and I am on my way to becoming a mindset coach, using this channel to spread my message and story. You have made great progress in your life, and it amazes me how even you and all of us experience "imposter syndrome." I can only tell you to stay real with what really moves you inside. You are still an inspiration of mine, stay strong man. Life is a journey and we are here to learn.
Hey John, first off props for the vulnerability to your audience about where you are. Honesty is the first step to taking real action and it's great you're embracing the reality of how you feel and where you are at. I'm sure for many, including myself, seeing you showcase your struggles as far ahead as you are from most men is a reminder that the destination, albeit, even financial freedom, is never more rewarding than the journey. I think the answers lies in which journey you decide to embark on next and maybe consider that it doesn't have to be a journey which you're familiar with (youtube, self improvement, programming, etc.). Consider cutting yourself off from as many projects as you can and allowing yourself to see what you'd actually want to fill that time with. Explore and remember that, you don't have to return to an old version of yourself to find that same fulfillment, it's moving towards something new that could give you a different flavor of excitement or fulfilment. Lastly, be weary of exposing such things like this too regularly to your audience or taking everyone's advice too seriously, including mine cause although many will appreciate it, not everyone is qualified and/or can properly empathize with your struggles with where you're at. Hope this comment helps and like you said, never give up brotha!
This video is one of the best on internet… you show us that we are humans not robots! And for all people out there which going through ups and downs…. Remember! It’s always a way out! Thank you for the bravery John 🙏
Myself and a good Friend (Scott) have a RUclips channel. (Tech Conception) and we've not been doing really well and we were talking about you and admiring the success you've been getting. To us, you were the benchmark. A part of me felt like a failure because I too have the bulldog mindset but I couldn't really get myself to finish my personal project or remain consistent with creating content. I felt like my life is slowly decaying and I'm going to reach retirement age still collecting a salary. and that scares me. I had an epiphany in my sleep. "Minimize Regret" or in other words "Complete whatever you start so as to minimize regret" and I literally woke up to start working on my side project when I came across your video and mehn, I felt it. Thank you for being so vulnerable with us. It just goes to show that we are all going through difficulties even the people we admire from a distance that we feel have it all figured out. They might also be going through it, we just don't see the full picture of their lives
John I can so relate. I went through similar all of 2022, after a breakdown from workaholism I became unmotivated, lost all drive and energy. I didn’t know myself without working on goals and achieving. Because I stopped caring about my purpose I became suicidal. I felt called to do intense inner work with pysch and various other mordalities. After 18 months the energy, drive and motivation has returned and Iv come out a new person. I now understand the universe forced me to have a season of rest, healing and isolation to move into whatever the next chapter is. I now have a new healthier, sustainable and more balanced way of working with my A type personality. Perhaps how your feeling is forcing a redirection into your next chapter that aligns with your new life. All the best xo
Been with you right since the early SP days… you probably don’t recognise my name but I always comment when you occasionally drop a video like this. I’ve ALWAYS seen you rebound and move forward and get back on track. You’ve got back on it before, and you’ll do it again, and should you come off track again, we’ll be here to support you. It’s hard now, but you’ll get through it. Rest, relax, refresh, regroup, refine. Even bulldogs have down days and times. p.s. on the topic of that ‘one thing’ to concentrate on, I could easily tell you, but you ain’t gonna value it as much as you doing that little bit of extra leg work and finding it for yourself… Hope that helps, keep strong man.
Just to add something after reading some comments. I am one of the people that follow your content since 2017 (simpoe programmer) and even if I was already in the path to become a developer at the moment, you helped me a lot with concepts like "trust the process" "the bulldog mindset" "don't be a victim" "get a high paying job and invest in real estate" .. So just to let you know, YOU inspired me a lot in my career choices and even as a man in general. I am sure that you will figure out how to come out even stronger from this tough period. You already have all what you need to do it again as you always did. Thank you and hope the best for you brother.
Thanks a lot for the frank talk. Huge respect for sharing so personal experience. I'm from your "Simple Programmer" audience. Many of your advices and tips are helping a lot in life from software developer and personal perspectives. Always glad to see and appreciate all of your content in any format.
John you hit the nail on the head here. All you do is irreplaceable and deeply appreciated. As for direction, getting women is an enormous problem for most guys. Personally I would like to spend coaching time with you face to face sort of like Kezia. Hope things work out for you bro. Looking forward to seeing how you move forward. We all support you. You are light years ahead in so many ways
Thanks for sharing this my man, I’ve been watching your journey and you do seem not as sharp as you used to, and at the same time I’m also not as sharp as when I was watching you back then. I was watching your dating shorts as of recent and thought you’d fell off but these recent vids have been a breath of fresh air - taking a step back to check yourself is the first step. You’ll find what aligns with your authentic self. Maybe ask your girl to give you some time on your own to reflect and figure it out. You’ve had big impact on my life man 🙏
John the next step after you end your hero's journey is contribution, you come back to your tribe and you share the gifts and the teachings to the next generations.
I’ve been watching for about 10 years and am in the well that never runs dry program. Either you could look for your next fear to conquer and document for us, or you could create a structure for us to conquer our own fears. So far we have been watching you check off boxes on your own list. Now that you’re older, you’re dealt a different hand with new priorities and ambitions. You touched on it in your video, and there’s fear in starting over vs maintaining old structures. Maybe instead of being hyper productive and disciplined, how can you find the right thing to do with less effort or time? Pretend you’re 20 or 40 years older. How would you tackle a new problem with less physical stamina? Maybe you could do an interview series with successful businessmen at later stages in life? How do they keep finding motivation after they are used to what they have achieved? How do they change their way of working with different challenges posed by aging? I look forward to seeing what you do next.
I think this is related to the "goal achieving mentality". I completely relate to what you are saying, when I don't find any goal I loose motivation to live. You need to have goals and chase them in your life !
I believe you have more to give beyond surface level stuff like how to pickup girls for nerds. Philosophy, life experience, sharing your opinion about different topics, maybe random vlogs would be great.
I think that regardless of what your next move is, you'll have to come to terms first with what you have accomplished, and that unfortunate the way that you give value to others may not be directly reflected on the money generated with your content and coaching sessions, yet it is value that you may want to take into account. In my case I've purchased and read your book soft skills and follow your content here so that may not be much in terms of revenue, but the amount of value generated to me in terms of personal growth and how and where to take my life is invaluable, just turned 25 and I think you have saved me at least a decade on future mistakes and time mismanagement. Something to think about Jhon, yes you might know about the persons you have coached but what about the countless others that you have influenced and may not engage proactively.
Thanks for the video, John. I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. Watching your videos since 2018 has made a huge positive difference in my life in both my business and on a personal level. No need to go so damn hard on yourself, it can be a good thing to set really high standards for yourself but remember everyone goes through plateaus and even periods of decline and that is all part of the journey and sometimes those periods make us bounce back even stronger or help us reinvent ourselves. I like your idea of helping geeks attract women, much needed these days, especially among younger men. Hell, I would say ALOT of men under the age of 30 need help attracting women even if they aren't geeks. Good luck with whichever direction your pursue and I'll continue to tune in. Thanks again for helping make a positive difference.
duuude....i can totally relate....i helped my wifes brother....when i met him...he didnt know anything....i taught him the foundation of business...he didnt even know what an LLC was....now hes a multi-millionaire, way ahead of me...and it drives me crazy
Thx for the honesty man 👏👏👏 Take your old videos, and remake them with your new experience it will 1- Help you connect with BullDog mindset of the past 2- Add value for viewers 3- Reset youtube algorithm for those video.
Your raw honesty, I believe, means you are on the right path. We all reach low points in life and can be hard to navigate at times in this modern world. Always back yourself. You got this brother! I have faith in you
I’m in a similar situation thats a bit worse. However as alphas we will always come out on top and never settle for anything less. You actually guided me through a tough predicament 8 years ago and I’m still thankful for that. Wishing you all the best bro!
We all struggle with things brother! It sounds like you might feel guilty about your previous marriage still? Also, if your familiar with NLP and you may have associated your previous marriage with your success / drive and now that has ended you might have an association between the two possibly and the reason you want to start something new. The financial part has been the biggest struggle for me and am still going through a 20 year marriage myself and debating on ending it living separated the last 4 years and the ability to possibly renew that and worrying about old paterns coming back and getting divorced anyway, it’s brutal and I am sure feels like a death of someone you loved for so long, I can only imagine my friend. There are people in their 50s who have failed financially who need to be picked up and start over, if you have advice for them to make allot of money quickly to retire in this inflationary environment, that would be helpful to many of us! Blessings my friend, appreciate you keeping it real, we all appreciate that! ❤️😎
Thanks for being so open and sharing this. I'm in a similar situation. I was super driven, motivated, and disciplined. But have fallen off in the past couple of years. What really resonated with me from this video is how the lack of direction can make someone feel empty no matter how much work they put in. Right now, I'm just focusing on making some progress every day without being hard on myself for not doing as much as I think I'm capable of. It definitely helps me to keep pushing forward, but I definitely need some direction in my life to feel fulfilled. Running on autopilot makes me miserable.
I’m in a similar boat. I was much more productive this time last year and am trying to return to that state. Just know that life has its ups and downs it’s inevitable. And I have no doubt that your situation will get better. Best of luck man
Hey John, you helped me tremendously throughout my life, and I can't ever thank you enough. I think your biggest gift is teaching and being an example of showing that you can be intelligent but still masculine which I have always thought is an either or. I think that's why you became so popular with your books and videos. Everyone has their own path so comparison is not a good solution and will only make you unhappy... I know easy to say, hard to do, as all things in Life... Whatever path you choose to take, I will continue watching you
Dear John You have no idea how much of impact you provided in my life. But the most realest reason I enjoy watching your videos is because i can feel that you are doing it for the people as well, we can see the message you trying to drive into us who watch your videos. Of course there will be obstacles and derails along the way but always be genuine and real. You are a great inspirer sir
you helped me a lot in my personal growth and am one of the main reasons I got into tech. If I were in your shoes, id probably try an in person business. I can tell you like helping people and your shift from programming content to personal growth shows that. If you can grow a local company and show up to work every day I think it will give a lot of structure and also put you in contact with day to day people. Online is great and all but im sure sometimes people get reduced down to numbers. Just my 2 cents
Thanks for being honest :) Let me share what is missing in the internet. There is a lot about getting a woman. And I mean A LOT. But there is not so much out there about actually keeping a woman. How to treat her to make her fulfilled. How to not react to certain things that she is doing and how to recognize them. Etc. Sadly, there is not that much about staying together, strong and happy for years. Maybe now when you have the right woman next to you, you could focus on this. There is a conflict of interest in this if she is going to watch though ;)
I'm an old school viewer from the days of Simple Programmer. I have a lot to say on this topic, and I really hope you read this. Here it goes... First of all I just want to say I appreciate your transparency, as always. In my opinion you should make content for those of us who have developed ourselves, found success, and are wondering what is next. I agree that many of us aren't happy when we aren't pursuing a goal. Once we do achieve it, there is often a period of happiness, but then existential dread creeps in because we aren't working towards anything anymore. Now that I lift weights, have a girlfriend, have a good software engineering job... What is next? For me personally, I am pursuing a career change and working on the question "how can I have a more positive impact on the world?" Being a software developer, especially considering the products I was working on at most jobs, felt relatively pointless in the grand scheme of things. I want to more directly help the world, help the planet, help individual people, etc. I actually think you would be making a mistake to focus more on "helping nerds get girlfriends", masculinity, etc. You have made a ton of content already on those topics, and we have all witnessed your transformation and have learned from it. Many of us have achieved these things and are wondering what is next. How do we go to the next level. What even is the next level? There's only so much content I want to consume about getting jacked, making tons of money, picking up hot girls, etc. At the end of the day it isn't sustainable/scalable in terms of the "meaning" it provides you in life. It is more "meaningful" than playing video games all day, but it isn't an infinite supply of "meaning". I'm searching for bigger supplies of "meaning". I think there are a ton of different directions to take it. We will probably all split off from here. Developing ourselves thus far has been like growing the base of a tree, but from here I think we all will branch out into different areas that are more meaningful for each of us as individuals. But maybe for now your next project in life could be helping us get to that next level as you work on finding what that is for yourself. Then the alignment would be back, and we would once again have the relationship with you where we feel like we are on the same journey together. By the way, I'm using a burner account because I didn't like how watching your videos on my main account starting poisoning my youtube recommendations ("the algorithm") with sleezy pickup channels. Seeing the type of content that got recommended to me after starting to watch these videos made me realize the type of person who needs help with women. It's not pretty... there's a lot of misogyny out there, and a lot of cringe and depressing people, and frankly a lot of jerks. So I started watching your content on a private tab on this burner account. This, in itself, in my opinion, is a sign that you started going down a bad path. It's honestly not surprising to me to see you now come and say you were doing unethical things, and you aren't in a good place, etc. I really think there is more to life than money, sex, fame, etc. Thinking about the greatest and most important events in human history, we can perhaps get some inspiration and get a better idea about what the truly meaningful things are. Abolishing slavery was fucking awesome. Landing a man on the moon was epic. Inventing the internet was a game changer. Overthrowing a monarchy and establishing a democracy turns me on. What all went into these things, who were the people involved, what did they do? How can we work towards something big and meaningful and important like that? What are the most important issues of our time? Slavery wasn't abolished by a single man. It took centuries of changing attitudes and the spread of liberal ideology, economic circumstances, political reforms, political conflicts, etc. My point being that having an impact on a seriously important issue doesn't require you to be someone as powerful as Abraham Lincoln. There were novelists who published influential stories that helped change attitudes towards abolitionism, for example. We can all play a role in something important. Regarding motivation and discipline, just imagine how motivating it would be if you were literally fighting a war to achieve independence from rulers you despise. How can picking up women ever be as motivating as that, especially once you have achieved success with women already? If your neighbors house was on fire, I think you would be motivated to run outside and help him. Well, I think there are a ton of motivating "house fires" all over the world. I really do think, in many ways, our neighbors' houses are on fire. TLDR: in the same way that working on masculinity is more meaningful than playing video games all day, I think there are things that are more meaningful than working on your masculinity all the time. I think pursuing those things should be your (our) next project.
I appreciate the honesty and being open .it takes alot of courage to say thy reality. I'm going through what you going through. It's a storm and it will pass .
This was such a great video, I’m so glad you published it. I know exactly the feeling of people who started out behind you and now they’re ahead of you. Everyone goes at their own pace. It’s not a race. Love your content.
Books I'd suggest you read/listen to in order while you are in this state (even if you already read/listened to them before): 1. Living Forward by Michael Hyatt
Hello John. I've been following you for years. I understand what you mean. Honestly, I found peace 9 years ago when I understood the meaning of life: try to please our Lord, do good deeds, help the needy, being good to the relatives... This is the message of islam (I was a former Christian). I think spirituality is a key aspect. I don't despise other religions even if I think islam is the truth, as the Quran is the last revelation after the Torah, the Gospel... Anyways, your videos have helped me a lot. I'm 34, have a wife and 2 kids. Once you will be a parent if God wills, your life will be different and have a deeper meaning. I hope you will experience this and become a father; I'm sure you will be a good one. Take care and may God protect you and your family
Big balls to be so publicly vulnerable mate. It’s just a valley and a slump. Happens to the best of us. You’ll get out of it. Don’t obsess over it and just accept it as a passing season. People who’ve achieved what you have, have internal strength that doesn’t simply just vanish. Congrats, you’ve realised you’re human. Don’t beat yourself up. Just show up everyday and don’t worry about perfection and mega success etc. Momentum will occur out of the blue and you’ll be a rocket once more
I relate to the struggle. I have reached enough passive income not to have to work anymore (thanks to your advice and your pointing me toward MJ DeMarco). At this point, metaphorically, it feels like there’s this rock on the ground. I know I can lift and move the rock around, which would be good for me. I know I can do it because I have cultivated the capacity for it and done it multiple times in the past (I might be a little rusty, though). Not only do I know I can do it, but I also know I can force myself to do it even though I don’t feel like doing it. There are also bigger rocks around, and I know I could theoretically become stronger and move then, too. There’s this expression I used to like: “Don’t rely on your motivation; rely on your willpower.” I believe that this is true but incomplete. You can use your willpower to overcome a lack of motivation, but you can only deploy your willpower if you are motivated to do so. It’s motivation all the way down. Having the capacity for it is not enough. For example, I have enough willpower to get a degree in gender studies; I just don’t have any motivation for it. It’s not aligned with anything else in me. Why would I force myself to do something that I don’t need? Why would I even want to become “stronger” than this? It doesn’t seem worthwhile anymore. The answer I’m currently considering is that I should become stronger not just for my selfish self but for the sake of others, too. Strength for the sake of the people that need help. Hanzi Freinacht has an interesting concept about becoming a “social justice warrior from within” in his new book “12 commandments,” which I think is interesting ruclips.net/video/LB2_YsOOdBA/видео.html. Idk, just some ideas.. Sorry if it didn't help much.
Hey man, this one of the best videos you have ever posted. I truly respect the honesty, for me it means that you repect your audience and I don't see this happening very often with other RUclipsrs. Very mature and what a true Bulldog would do. To be honest, I've been a bit suspicious about the Bulldog concept but this right here got me to really listen
Many people think with enough growth we'll find eventually reach a point we can rest and be satisfied. John, your story shows us personal development is a life long journey. We will always have mental hardships to face, but we can gain the strength to keep on pushing along. Seeing you push through is an inspiration to us all.
You've always been someone I looked up to for so long. When im in a rut and feeling like shit I remember this video of yours where you said that if I just stick to my daily goals (running, pomodoros etc) for two weeks at the end of the two weeks I would feel substantially better and this has worked 100% of the time. Starting out is just a pain in the ass but it gets easier and at the end of the two weeks I feel like I can make significant progress in whatever I set my mind to. Good Luck my guy! Hope you come back stronger and better.
You want simple? here it is: 1. If you choose to continue with 'Bulldog Mindset': Reach deep inside your mind and find the one thing you believe is the source of all success. Give it your all, be the thing's GUY, #1 in the world. 2. If you choose to start over: Close shop/Exit and let time do it's thing. Once your plate is empty you'll get hungry again.
start first with a bodily change like haircut and cleanshaven 6:50 "I can never go back and be the guy I was five years ago" you actually can ethically too JMULV has open marriage with Liz ask him and you can still get shredded if you want. There's no physics blocking this You need to imagine your perfect day, no limits, and get it done, that is the bulldog way I understand.
The bulldog. Gets bitten. But it Gets Back Up. Very serving man has scarves. Life is tough. Appreciate your content brother, may you experience love with your loved ones.
I really appreciate your honesty with this. I noticed the change in videos recently and see it as a transition period. Not much I can comment on here honestly, but on the other end I’m sure you’ll have more interesting and new things to share.
Went through this about 2 years ago. It’s actually bananas just how deeply seeded our habits and routines are particularly with a significant other - and how difficult it is to step out of that comfort zone. Fear of the unknown…I think that’s the primary reason people stay in situations and relationships that should have ended long ago. I’m new to your content so I’m not sure of how you were before but you’ll likely never be exactly how you used to be. You’ve grown in some way since then and are no longer that same person, not a bad thing in my opinion. To loosely quote another popular tuber “People will do more to avoid pain than they will to gain pleasure…limiting beliefs that we can’t do, or don’t deserve better keeps people imprisoned in their dysfunctional relationships because after a while - it’s all they know”. Takes a lot of courage and a strong belief to know that there’s something better out there for ourselves. Sometimes you have to crawl through the swamp to get to the beach. Good on you too for having a friend you can talk with about it…That’s significant therapy in and of itself.
I’m a financially free real estate guy about your age. I have something that is really easy to maintain but I don’t like doing it anymore either so I really identify. We should talk.
We appreciate the honesty John, and many of us feel you on so many levels. The "helping geeks get girlfriends" idea has the most potential for positive impact for millions of young men who can't figure out how to get women. Personally, and as a programmer, I had to learn about "game" from all of the sleezey guys that i'm sure you're aware of. It's hard for me to recommend that content to my nerdy friends who can't figure out women. We're all rooting for you and looking forward to your comeback.
Even if you're not on top of things, you're still an inspiration for me and have helped me in all the areas you talk about. And I appreciate the honesty. I feel like the helping nerds get girlfriends ideas would be particularly beneficial for me 😅. A relevant quote that comes to mind is, when you win, you party, when you fail, you ponder, and all greatness come from pondering. 🤔
Really appreciate your candidness. No “you tube guru” or Andrew Tate lives an ideal life. I recently watched a Jocko podcast where he talked about a friend he had who had all sorts of bad stuff happening to him. Jocko told him his problem is he woke up in the woods and he’s just standing there figuring out where he is or what to do. Jocko said if it was him he’d just start walking. Eventually he’d hit a stream, River, road, town then he’d just figure it out. Nothing you describe is abnormal. As men were taught to internalize everything and with red pill it’s pounded into us that “nobody cares about a man’s problems” so we have to care about each other.
Great video, thanks for publishing! It felt like someone is talking my own thoughts from a slightly different perspective. Even tho we are very different it felt incredibly relatable, especially parts of not being sure if you've got what it takes to start over and the one when you compare yourself to those who focused on one thing and went way further than you did. Great stuff. We're all on a different journey in a different place of it. The end of that journey is only the moment we die. Nothing else stops it.
I believe you are on your way to creating the best content of you life. I can feel it. Man, trust yourself and take this to whatever it leads, it will be awesome. You are connected to something special right now
Hey John, speaking with Dr K from HealthyGamerGG RUclips channel could help you find direction by making you more aware of some of your unconscious thought processes. Listening to you reminded me of several concepts he's mentioned before and feel he might be able to untangle and simplify your thinking. Wish you the best.
Hey John, believe me you’re not messing up the channel with these types of videos! I think it feels more relatable to the consumer. In my opinion these types of videos are a great idea! Plus you can vent in a somewhat productive manner and not bottle shit up. Thank you for all your advice!
People are often motivated by love. You worked your ass off, but now you have a beautiful wife. You got the ultimate goal. Motivation often falls off after this. It's tough.
Damn this is the realest video I have seen in a long time on RUclips. You are really brave for being vulnerable like this, and honestly this is when RUclips is at its best. I want to say that I have been a long time follower since SP and you have helped me immensely with everything from philosophy, handling relationships, to becoming a programmer and getting that job, for that I want to say thank you. But just like you felt back in the day before starting SP, I am also now starting to feel that I don't want to be a code monkey for the rest of my life. I enjoy programming but I have other passions I want to pursue more such as indie game dev, and most importantly be financially free. For me personally I would love to see videos about that specific transition from wage slaving to creating your own business, everything from mindset, choosing the right endeavor, to handling it economically. One particular topic I am curious about is if RUclips really is the only option to be financially free nowadays. TechLead is pretending that he's not reliant on RUclips and that he is retired because of all his side hustles but when you look around I think many don't want to admit that it is all only possible because of RUclips, I really think RUclips/social media is the main gate to get out of the typical 9-5 job nowadays. And finally, I have been struggling a lot as well with what to focus on. I was aimless throughout my whole 20s and finally when I turned 31 I got a programming job after self studying hard for 2 years. You have already showed me with this video how important that it is to put your focus on one thing. I feel like this is something that is not talked about more. Regardless what content you decide to make, I will always be a follower because you are the realest G in this space. Big thank you once again.
Everytime John is speaking to us through the camera, he really feels like a big brother guiding us... For some reason whatever what he say's, I just trust him and I don't second guess his intentions. Personal message to you John no matter what you are going through you are always in my heart and such an inspiration, I love you bro!
Hey John, Sorry I got a bit late to reply to this, I wanted to reply sooner but wanted to spend some time to think about this. You are an amazing role model and mentor to me, and your videos/wisdom have helped me learn/grow immensely since my teenage years (26 now), thank you so much for your amazing work so far. I am sorry for the pain of the seperation you are going through, and the difficulty of this massive transition in your life, but I know that after you get through this it will get better and you will have a much more happy and fulfilling relationship/life. I fully understand the feeling of stagnation/peaking you are experiencing. Sometimes it feels like you are stuck in the same spot and can't progress despite the amount of hard work you put in. I have been there many times, and am in a similar boat myself right now. One thing that really stood out out to me was when you said you lost your identity. I think this might be because of those other aspects of your life being affected by this (i.e. fitness, diet, business, productivity, etc). Such times are extremely rough but as you said, we have to let our lower self do its thing, and in our higher self we need to remember things will get better and steer ourselves towards where we need to reach. After you find your direction and get these things in order again, I am sure you will feel like a "kick ass mother fucker" guy again, altough I still see you as one :P You mentioned that you are thinking of dedicating your focus onto specific problems, such as helping nerds get dates. Although at the moment I am a girlfriend-less nerd myself at the moment, I feel like you have so much more wisdom to share. I enjoy all your content - from relationship advice, to your life advice, to your financial lessons. Perhaps it would be cool if you made a series on nerds and dating, but the rest of your content is amazing too. This is just my thought though, at the end of the day I hope you do whatever fulfills you, and helps you succeed/progress the most. I will watch regardless of whatever you do :P Hang in there brother, I believe in you and know you will come back stronger and better, and with hard work and dedication you will reach the next levels!
My advice would be to take a day or a week how long necessary to clean up your life before deciding what to do next. Start with cleaning your house, closets, cupboards, kitchen, computer files, your e-mails, your systems etc. until everything is neat and tidy and clarity will emerge itself. It is shocking what it can do to your mind.
Hey John, Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings so genuinely. You are kind of a role model for me since many years and you've influenced my thoughts and beliefs through your videos, podcasts (especially Entreprogrammers) and books. This phase that you're going through right now will certainly also improve you. Maybe not in a bulldog way, but somehow deeper on an emotional level. I hope you will keep sharing your wisdom with us. Your unique experiences can help so many of us in different areas of our lifes.
Appreciate your honesty. Vids like this do more for me than anything else, just to show that it's okay if you're not perfect. I've been struggling for 2 years. Lost my business and 40 staff, 10 years of work and toil, my amazing partner, many friends and all of my wealth. I feel guilty for not springing back into action and crushing, but I honestly just don't feel up to it right now. I haven't stopped moving forward. I own 2 properties and earn 200k (AUD), 120 USD, so I'm OK, but I'm not crushing. Far from it. Drinking, not exercising, sporadically eating healthy then shiite. I feel like a farkin failure. But I have progressed, I am getting a hold on it, but it's disappointing that I didn't bounce back like a farkin cyborg. That's the truth of it.
I think that how you feel it's completely normal. You are a great man and helped a lot of people, but "just a human after all" as Rag n bone man says....
Hey John, from the way your describing the way you feel, I've felt similar and I realized the problem for me was being too obsessive and self critical, it seemed like the right thing to do but it wasn't for me. I started being nicer to myself and then my mind started finding its way back center after that. Go back to psycho cybernetics and review that chapters on the automatic success mechanism and automatic failure mechanism within the mind, specifically the part on the real self vs the actual self, he explains it in a way that helped me.
Hey brother, when I was 21 I was super down about never having a girlfriend and your videos really gave me the mindset I needed to finally get one. (That and micro dosing shrooms) so I’m very thankful 🙏
First of all I would like to say John how much I appreciate your authenticity and truth I even look up to you more now as it takes a lot to share the place you at I'm a long time fan and a member of the bulldog mindset and what I love the most about your content is mindset and stoic philosophy I watched all the mindset videos on bulldog mindset around 4 times and they are really life changing I had so many hard moments in business, girls, parents, covid and etc and your mindset videos were always there to help me I feel like no matter what your problem is in life it all comes to mindset, because your mindset determines your view on life which determines your actions You can see it all the time with girls and business, you can tell someone exactly what to do, a step by step formula, if he doesn't have the right mindset he will fail With all the respect to you and believe me I have a lot, I feel like with fitness, women and business your advice is amazing but I have other people who focus only on those subjects and have better advice. When it comes to mindset I feel like you are my best source of knowledge, I would get any content or program you will have on mindset in a sec I really hope you can come up with something like this, I already watched your mindset lessons on the bulldog mindset program a few times so I need new videos hahaha Thank you for helping me so much throughout the years and like you say, it's just a cycle, your next cycle will be even bigger and better than you ever had Much love, take care bro ❤
What a wholesome video. I'm truly glad you did publish it. I can relate to most of the things you talk about and after watching this I'll question my life even more :D. Answering your question: Lately I'm getting the vibe that you served in legion and survived through the retirement. You don't have will to fight wars any more but you still get fired up thinking and talking about it. When you talk about it you are ready to strap the sward and run towards battlefield but then you stop, think and acknowledge that... that is just the past. I neither think nor feel that teaching geeks how to get girls will fully suit you. I'm following you non stop since 2015 and I've seen the progression, growth, changes and almost all that channel went through (I don't know what was going on before that, never watched your video that are that old) and teaching geeks how to get girls just doesn't sit right when I think about it. That would be something that you'll be successful in but I think that if you do that you'll soon make part two of this video. From all the content you published, what I liked the most was on masculinity and discipline. Yes pickup content was good but I never watched you just because of it. Maybe you don't want/can/feel like you can fight battles/wars any more but your life experiences aren't in vain. You may as well be older man that's initiating younger man into masculinity. That is what I think and feel will suit you best. Initiating men into masculinity, that is lost in todays world and nobody does it. Everyone talks about masculinity but hardly anybody experienced enough of life to know it's essence and initiate other. Path of passage. In most regards you are THE guy to do this. I was thinking about this couple of times watching some of your videos and being in coaching calls. This opinion isn't formed based just on this video. I think that you can regain bulldog mindset that you had but the direction needs to be a more grounded, settled, calmer, quieter.
John, I have been into self development since I discovered the pua community in 2014, and after seeing so many people in the self help community over the years, I am very selective about who I follow and respect in that community. You are one of the few. What I find unique about you and what intrigues me the most in your content is your mindset/strong understanding of masculinity and what it means to be a man. I don’t see this deep understanding of masculinity elsewhere in the men’s self help community. One of the key videos that hooked me early on was the concept of killing off your father. I think your understanding of masculinity should be the foundation of your path ahead. It is rare to find and very impactful/life changing.
Man I felt this so much bro. Everything you said you’re doing I’m doing after having that bulldog mindset. I feel like I lost myself this past year. But the only thing we can do is be man, an keep pushing through everything.
Hey John, I've been following you since the early Simple Programmer days and you were always an inspiration to me. We all go through such difficult times; I also experienced a tough period in the past year but the bulldog is there ready to come back stronger than ever. Your brightest days are still ahead of you! Keep up the great work!
I really appreciated this video, it just shows that even if you are on top of the world with a ton of different side incomes, amazing body, marathon running and picking up chicks, we all can 'fall' of the wagon every once in a while. Please don't get rid of that stuff, perhaps just hire a consultant to downsize it and make it more sleek. You are in a very fortunate position financially so you can just take a sabbatical, go for a little travel, maybe take up meditation practice, hire a high ticket high performance coach. At the very least this vid has inspired me to get multiple streams of income so thanks for that Bdog!
John, I’ve been following “red pill” or men’s self improvement topics since abt 2019. Having listen to most of the big names in the space and even paid money for product from some of them, I genuinely think you are the best and most balanced content creator in this space. To be honest I think your current content, although it may seem “all over the place” is pretty good, because honestly, life is multifaceted and there are so many different issues a man has to deal with. I believe what ever you do will continue to help men. I think what someone else in the comments has suggested would be nice - keep Bulldog Mindset as it is and have a separate channel for the other content. only thing i would suggest is maybe expand to it to a more general “masculine for geeks” topic. I think lots of guys nowadays are geeky in some way whether it’s likely video games or movies too much or whatever, and masculine advice starting from that perspective would be helpful.
My man, Im only 10 minutes through this vid. All I can say is that I wish the best for your future and Im convinced that with your passion for live and honesty about your struggles, things will turn out just fine. Im a young sportsman going through a confusing, rough time as well, and seeing an idol like you struggling and feeling deep pain as well, just makes me more optimistic about the world. Its all how its supposed to be and we will emerge wiser, fullfilled and more compassionate.
John, this message is from an older Bulldog in his mid-50s. You are very authentic and I appreciate your candor and straightforward message. I have always appreciated this about you. You've helped many men and we thank you for your hard work. You have the courage to make videos that go against the PC culture. I have gained insight to many things you have shared and it's been helpful. I have found for me that you can chase more money, more useful work challenges, the next thing but there seems to be a spiritual vacuum with you (in my opinion). Only Jesus Christ can fill that vacuum. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. That whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have eternal life"-John 3:16. You have created a great life for you and your family, what about eternity? A personal relationship with Jesus Christ can fill that void. You always tell us bulldogs to be straightforward so I am being straight forward also. You're a great guy and you've helped me in my life. Godspeed, Brian Taylor Oceanside CA
I just want to thank all of you guys for showing me so much support here. I really appreciate all the comments. I read every single one and I have received a lot of good advice. I, of course, have to choose my own path, but it helps to know the impact I've made on so many people's lives. I wish there were an easy answer, but this is a struggle I just have to work through and when the time comes I will know exactly what to do. Thank you all.
You are the man John, lets get it 🔥💪
Much respect for sharing this video, brother. It takes a lot of courage to open up about struggles and I appreciate your bravery in sharing your story. Keep up the great work! 👍
Love Ya Brother
why not give religion a try?
Myron from F&F is Muslim and Islam do agree with most of Red pill contents
hes a christian@@ZCoreStudio
One reason I've stuck with you all these years, while unsubscribing many others, is you have for the most part been genuine/real/vulnerable with us. I can't say how much you've impacted my life in a positive way and helped me see through all the pill colors.
I agree, you will get through this rough patch and give us some tips that helped you through. The value you give is more meaningful as you stay real. Thank you sir!
Thank you. I really appreciate you.
As a 30 year old man who doesnt have his life together, anything you create that helps me put it together for free through the internet is amazing and will keep me subscribed.
Dude, you're not a hypocrite you're just human. We can't be the perfect ideal man 24/7.
This is the second video that I saw, you are down/rant. Then I have seen you come back better. This is a huge motivation for us and it helps us. This is video is way better than any of the other personal development/coaching videos out there in any channel, as all we see are their good times. What you show us here is the reality. This is very unique and uplifting to everyone. Probably one of the best videos I have seen in decades.
Come unto me, all ye that Labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
Finish 4th grade.
Listen to me John, lemme tell you something honest here, this is your "best" video so far, literally. I need to bookmark this somewhere!
Lemme give you an honest perspective from someone who's been consuming your content since 2017. I was among the very first who bought your book "the complete software development career guide" and among those who watched every video of Simple Programmer channel. So here's my point :
1. I tent to have in so many times, as an alpha, the same feeling that you're having right now. And what I do? I used to be harsh on myself and try to have that bulldog mindset, and feel ashamed if I ever got that state of mind again. However, seeing you doing this kind of ranty form is really really helpful to me, to us, to feel that it's totally okay to crush sometimes and feel bad about ourselves.
2. You're one of the very few people who influenced my 20s, seriously! The content that I really enjoyed and learned a lot from is: carrer development, decipline (project management, pomodoro, and that stuff), and masculanity.
3. Finally, I wanna say thank you for sharing such an honest view about yourself and personality. We all tend to go thought it, especially as alpha males. You fucking rock John. Can't wait for your next video in whatever you find meaningful to you.
Much love & respect.
You've helped me a lot man. Stay strong and remember you deserve to feel happy❤️
John, you are a gift to all of us. Your content - including this video - has helped more people than you will ever realize. My gut feeling is that helping geeks get girlfriends is not work that will fulfill you. I believe you have grown beyond that and are at a point where you can offer wisdom, deeper philosophy and life lessons to the world. Think about it. Much love to you
TBH, their is a HUGE need out there for men of all ages to be courageous enough to approach the opposite sex.
@@shaddwatson1833 I am speaking to what will fulfill John
@@krisgiovanetti That’s a fair point, Kris. I also think anyone who wants to address the need to help men discover who they are as men so they can put themselves out there in the marketplace in an attractive manner is not something you can grow beyond. Especially considering how impactful this area is and will be for the rest of one’s life.
I found John a number of years ago from "Simple Programmer"
@krisgiovanetti i agree with you, and to me that is the thing that he does the best i mean his date and financial advice are really good, but the videos that have deep philosophy, life lessons and wisdom are life changing and you can't find it in another RUclips channel out there, this is high quality wisdom that i just can find in john's content.
About me: autism, 46 years old, software developer, basically a virgin, interested in Stoicism, interested in masculinity, running once a week, bodypump twice a week, own a house, cold showers, bitterness is holding me back I know the way out is gratefulness; maybe you could do a video on fighting bitterness, a few women were interested in me who smoked cigarettes but that was a deal breaker
46 and a virgin? Now I feel grateful that I've hooked up with almost 20 chick's and I'm in my early 20s. I was starting to feel bad because I got over the Hookup culture and I just want a feminine woman who's all about me. I see there are guys out there who got it worse. I will give you some advice though, look into red pill and game techniques. This will help you get some of those hook up culture chick's. It's harder to get a nurturing sweet feminine woman which is what I'm struggling with now. Those traumatized chick's that red pill techniques work on are easy to get. Don't put them on a pedestal
Even the ones that you think are decent feminine women, most will end up betraying you given the opportunity in their minds in the long run. Only way around that is if you're just that much better than her and she knows it every day. Only way she'll want to keep a man.
@@BeardAxeMcAxeBeardDon't be so cynical...
I would say find places you can meet more women that share your interests but coding is very male dominated so it's not impossible but rare. Just finding groups and social places meeting people naturally and developing relationships that way as opposed to dating sites, that worked for me
Thanks for sharing. I think most of us listening are developers.
We all appreciate the honesty. Let me relieve any anxiety you might have about “not being the guy you tell others to be” right now. Everyone understands that no one practices what they preach 100% of the time. That said: I read your book, followed it, and became a dev. Your sh!t works. What you do is valuable. It rescued me and gave me a life. The struggle for me now isn’t getting a girlfriend specifically , it’s building real life social connections. I’m in a new city and have realized how hard it is to meet new people as a grown male. I also feel like this is a pretty universal problem among males in 2023. I feel like if you could focus on one thing that would be valuable now, it would be how to network and how to build authentic connections with people. If you have that skill then everything from money to women comes easily.
I totally agree with this
You’re a genuine guy, it’s easy to tell you have a good heart. Best wishes to you my friend
I feel the same way as you in a way I feel like I’m more than just a RUclips channel and a content creator. Life is bigger than this ‼️
I’m tryna prepare myself for the real life instead of wasting time and neglecting my health. I was trying to please a crowd that didn’t give a fuck about me
I just love the honesty, it takes a lot to come on camera and tell us your feelings and struggles. Well done John, I am following you since simple programmer and your videos changed my life 5 years ago when I hit my worst. It seems to me that you are looking to be aligned with your purpose, you genuinely want to make an impact.
You don’t need perfect edited videos to make an impact on our lives, you are doing right now!Since my life transformation back in 2018 I have felt like you from times to times, wanting to go back to my golden era, when I made the most progress in life and that I saw myself as a bulldog. I can really relate but what helps me is never give up, keep on showing up even tho it is not perfect. At some point the light will switch back and you will get out of the cave. Wish you well!
Honestly, man, this is exactly the video I needed to watch. It resonated with me and gave me some insights on what I need to do in my own life. It takes guts to publish this kind of stuff, so well done!
My 2 cents, as someone who just passed 50...
All the way through my 40's, I was unstoppable. I would literally work 100+ hour weeks for months and even years on end. Three degrees, 4 professional certifications, numerous businesses. Informally educated in dozens of more subjects. I used to workout literally every day of the week. When I was single, even into my 40's, I would have a rotation of women that sometimes hit double-digits. I've travelled to almost 50 countries and done a lot of cool stuff. It wasn't that many years ago that I worked a demanding full-time job in one profession, while simultaneously building a business in an entirely different discipline, and still found time to volunteer, chase women, travel, and stay fit, not to mention all the mundane tasks that keeps it all functioning.
My point... I don't have that level of drive and energy today. I have literally marveled out loud to people over the past year or two that I have no idea where I found the time and energy to do all of that. Don't get me wrong, I probably still achieve more in a year than the average person in their 20's and 30's. I still travel and run 2 different businesses. I spend hours a day learning and yes, still find time to hit the weights or the treadmill, though not as regularly. To an outsider, I probably look like I'm still killin' it, but to me, I see the difference. I miss the me from 10 years back, but I've had to make my peace that a bit slower pace is just the season of life I'm in. I haven't achieved even half of what I still want to do, but I am resigned to the fact that it might just have to happen at a slower pace.
One other thought... do you think having a steady partner now is correlated to the changes? I've never had a shortage of women coming into my life, so the single periods were busy times. However, I often moved into a relationship after 6 months of the single life. Part of it was the abundance of women allowed me to identify one that was worth committing to. The other part was that dating that many women is a full-time job in itself, so having only one to worry about was a time-saving technique that allowed me to get back to productive pursuits. The current GF has been around for a number of years so was part of that transition from the 40's to the 50's. She is much younger than I am, so I imagine she keeps me young as well. That all said, I do see a correlation in my own life between the years in the current relationship and the "decline" in my own tenacity and productivity. In some ways being in a relationship should free up time, and I'm sure in my case it does. I haven't done any housework in years, and I'm no longer entirely sure just where in the house the kitchen is, but it must still be there as a steady supply of food does issue forth. I can literally get up and spend every waking moment doing something that moves the needle, yet it seems that less gets done than the days when I had to change the sheets and run the vacuum between visitors.
Anyway, I will be interested to see what you come up with John! Maybe we will both get back in touch with our most hardcore selves.
Came from the email thread. But really appreciate this reflection. I’m in the same place and I know it’s a process that takes time. Appreciate this.
John I appreciate your honesty.
I foubd your channel 3 years ago and I started watching your videos on mindset and confidence, those are my favorites.
In fact, you were an inspiration to start transforming my body and my life in general.
I have lost 40 kg in the last two years, I was finally able to approach women I liked, and I am on my way to becoming a mindset coach, using this channel to spread my message and story.
You have made great progress in your life, and it amazes me how even you and all of us experience "imposter syndrome."
I can only tell you to stay real with what really moves you inside.
You are still an inspiration of mine, stay strong man.
Life is a journey and we are here to learn.
You got my respect man! We all have our issues and I can't think of one human being who doesn't have one.
it's OK to not always be perfect. Don't push yourself too hard ,sometimes all you need is to rest in order to come back stronger .
Hey John, first off props for the vulnerability to your audience about where you are. Honesty is the first step to taking real action and it's great you're embracing the reality of how you feel and where you are at. I'm sure for many, including myself, seeing you showcase your struggles as far ahead as you are from most men is a reminder that the destination, albeit, even financial freedom, is never more rewarding than the journey. I think the answers lies in which journey you decide to embark on next and maybe consider that it doesn't have to be a journey which you're familiar with (youtube, self improvement, programming, etc.). Consider cutting yourself off from as many projects as you can and allowing yourself to see what you'd actually want to fill that time with. Explore and remember that, you don't have to return to an old version of yourself to find that same fulfillment, it's moving towards something new that could give you a different flavor of excitement or fulfilment. Lastly, be weary of exposing such things like this too regularly to your audience or taking everyone's advice too seriously, including mine cause although many will appreciate it, not everyone is qualified and/or can properly empathize with your struggles with where you're at. Hope this comment helps and like you said, never give up brotha!
Thank you for being human and sharing this.
This video is one of the best on internet… you show us that we are humans not robots! And for all people out there which going through ups and downs…. Remember! It’s always a way out! Thank you for the bravery John 🙏
Myself and a good Friend (Scott) have a RUclips channel. (Tech Conception) and we've not been doing really well and we were talking about you and admiring the success you've been getting. To us, you were the benchmark. A part of me felt like a failure because I too have the bulldog mindset but I couldn't really get myself to finish my personal project or remain consistent with creating content. I felt like my life is slowly decaying and I'm going to reach retirement age still collecting a salary. and that scares me.
I had an epiphany in my sleep. "Minimize Regret" or in other words "Complete whatever you start so as to minimize regret" and I literally woke up to start working on my side project when I came across your video and mehn, I felt it.
Thank you for being so vulnerable with us. It just goes to show that we are all going through difficulties even the people we admire from a distance that we feel have it all figured out. They might also be going through it, we just don't see the full picture of their lives
John I can so relate. I went through similar all of 2022, after a breakdown from workaholism I became unmotivated, lost all drive and energy. I didn’t know myself without working on goals and achieving. Because I stopped caring about my purpose I became suicidal.
I felt called to do intense inner work with pysch and various other mordalities.
After 18 months the energy, drive and motivation has returned and Iv come out a new person.
I now understand the universe forced me to have a season of rest, healing and isolation to move into whatever the next chapter is. I now have a new healthier, sustainable and more balanced way of working with my A type personality.
Perhaps how your feeling is forcing a redirection into your next chapter that aligns with your new life. All the best xo
Been with you right since the early SP days… you probably don’t recognise my name but I always comment when you occasionally drop a video like this.
I’ve ALWAYS seen you rebound and move forward and get back on track. You’ve got back on it before, and you’ll do it again, and should you come off track again, we’ll be here to support you. It’s hard now, but you’ll get through it.
Rest, relax, refresh, regroup, refine. Even bulldogs have down days and times.
p.s. on the topic of that ‘one thing’ to concentrate on, I could easily tell you, but you ain’t gonna value it as much as you doing that little bit of extra leg work and finding it for yourself…
Hope that helps, keep strong man.
Love you John! One of the most genuine people on the platform! ✊🏾♥️
Just to add something after reading some comments. I am one of the people that follow your content since 2017 (simpoe programmer) and even if I was already in the path to become a developer at the moment, you helped me a lot with concepts like "trust the process" "the bulldog mindset" "don't be a victim" "get a high paying job and invest in real estate" .. So just to let you know, YOU inspired me a lot in my career choices and even as a man in general. I am sure that you will figure out how to come out even stronger from this tough period. You already have all what you need to do it again as you always did.
Thank you and hope the best for you brother.
Thanks a lot for the frank talk. Huge respect for sharing so personal experience.
I'm from your "Simple Programmer" audience. Many of your advices and tips are helping a lot in life from software developer and personal perspectives.
Always glad to see and appreciate all of your content in any format.
John you hit the nail on the head here. All you do is irreplaceable and deeply appreciated. As for direction, getting women is an enormous problem for most guys. Personally I would like to spend coaching time with you face to face sort of like Kezia. Hope things work out for you bro. Looking forward to seeing how you move forward. We all support you. You are light years ahead in so many ways
Thanks for sharing this my man, I’ve been watching your journey and you do seem not as sharp as you used to, and at the same time I’m also not as sharp as when I was watching you back then. I was watching your dating shorts as of recent and thought you’d fell off but these recent vids have been a breath of fresh air - taking a step back to check yourself is the first step. You’ll find what aligns with your authentic self. Maybe ask your girl to give you some time on your own to reflect and figure it out. You’ve had big impact on my life man 🙏
John the next step after you end your hero's journey is contribution, you come back to your tribe and you share the gifts and the teachings to the next generations.
I’ve been watching for about 10 years and am in the well that never runs dry program.
Either you could look for your next fear to conquer and document for us, or you could create a structure for us to conquer our own fears.
So far we have been watching you check off boxes on your own list. Now that you’re older, you’re dealt a different hand with new priorities and ambitions. You touched on it in your video, and there’s fear in starting over vs maintaining old structures.
Maybe instead of being hyper productive and disciplined, how can you find the right thing to do with less effort or time? Pretend you’re 20 or 40 years older. How would you tackle a new problem with less physical stamina?
Maybe you could do an interview series with successful businessmen at later stages in life? How do they keep finding motivation after they are used to what they have achieved? How do they change their way of working with different challenges posed by aging?
I look forward to seeing what you do next.
I think this is related to the "goal achieving mentality". I completely relate to what you are saying, when I don't find any goal I loose motivation to live. You need to have goals and chase them in your life !
I believe you have more to give beyond surface level stuff like how to pickup girls for nerds. Philosophy, life experience, sharing your opinion about different topics, maybe random vlogs would be great.
True, would love to watch more mature topics.
@@happypotato4252amen! Agree
I think that regardless of what your next move is, you'll have to come to terms first with what you have accomplished, and that unfortunate the way that you give value to others may not be directly reflected on the money generated with your content and coaching sessions, yet it is value that you may want to take into account.
In my case I've purchased and read your book soft skills and follow your content here so that may not be much in terms of revenue, but the amount of value generated to me in terms of personal growth and how and where to take my life is invaluable, just turned 25 and I think you have saved me at least a decade on future mistakes and time mismanagement. Something to think about Jhon, yes you might know about the persons you have coached but what about the countless others that you have influenced and may not engage proactively.
Thank you for your honesty.
Thanks for the honesty and authenticity. Take care
Thanks for the video, John. I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. Watching your videos since 2018 has made a huge positive difference in my life in both my business and on a personal level. No need to go so damn hard on yourself, it can be a good thing to set really high standards for yourself but remember everyone goes through plateaus and even periods of decline and that is all part of the journey and sometimes those periods make us bounce back even stronger or help us reinvent ourselves. I like your idea of helping geeks attract women, much needed these days, especially among younger men. Hell, I would say ALOT of men under the age of 30 need help attracting women even if they aren't geeks. Good luck with whichever direction your pursue and I'll continue to tune in. Thanks again for helping make a positive difference.
duuude....i can totally relate....i helped my wifes brother....when i met him...he didnt know anything....i taught him the foundation of business...he didnt even know what an LLC was....now hes a multi-millionaire, way ahead of me...and it drives me crazy
Thx for the honesty man 👏👏👏
Take your old videos, and remake them with your new experience it will 1- Help you connect with BullDog mindset of the past 2- Add value for viewers 3- Reset youtube algorithm for those video.
Your raw honesty, I believe, means you are on the right path. We all reach low points in life and can be hard to navigate at times in this modern world. Always back yourself. You got this brother! I have faith in you
Thank you, John keep moving forward,
I’m in a similar situation thats a bit worse. However as alphas we will always come out on top and never settle for anything less.
You actually guided me through a tough predicament 8 years ago and I’m still thankful for that. Wishing you all the best bro!
We all struggle with things brother!
It sounds like you might feel guilty about your previous marriage still?
Also, if your familiar with NLP and you may have associated your previous marriage with your success / drive and now that has ended you might have an association between the two possibly and the reason you want to start something new.
The financial part has been the biggest struggle for me and am still going through a 20 year marriage myself and debating on ending it living separated the last 4 years and the ability to possibly renew that and worrying about old paterns coming back and getting divorced anyway, it’s brutal and I am sure feels like a death of someone you loved for so long, I can only imagine my friend.
There are people in their 50s who have failed financially who need to be picked up and start over, if you have advice for them to make allot of money quickly to retire in this inflationary environment, that would be helpful to many of us!
Blessings my friend, appreciate you keeping it real, we all appreciate that! ❤️😎
Thanks for being so open and sharing this. I'm in a similar situation. I was super driven, motivated, and disciplined. But have fallen off in the past couple of years.
What really resonated with me from this video is how the lack of direction can make someone feel empty no matter how much work they put in.
Right now, I'm just focusing on making some progress every day without being hard on myself for not doing as much as I think I'm capable of. It definitely helps me to keep pushing forward, but I definitely need some direction in my life to feel fulfilled. Running on autopilot makes me miserable.
I’m in a similar boat. I was much more productive this time last year and am trying to return to that state. Just know that life has its ups and downs it’s inevitable. And I have no doubt that your situation will get better. Best of luck man
Hey John, you helped me tremendously throughout my life, and I can't ever thank you enough. I think your biggest gift is teaching and being an example of showing that you can be intelligent but still masculine which I have always thought is an either or. I think that's why you became so popular with your books and videos. Everyone has their own path so comparison is not a good solution and will only make you unhappy... I know easy to say, hard to do, as all things in Life... Whatever path you choose to take, I will continue watching you
Dear John
You have no idea how much of impact you provided in my life. But the most realest reason I enjoy watching your videos is because i can feel that you are doing it for the people as well, we can see the message you trying to drive into us who watch your videos. Of course there will be obstacles and derails along the way but always be genuine and real. You are a great inspirer sir
you helped me a lot in my personal growth and am one of the main reasons I got into tech. If I were in your shoes, id probably try an in person business. I can tell you like helping people and your shift from programming content to personal growth shows that. If you can grow a local company and show up to work every day I think it will give a lot of structure and also put you in contact with day to day people. Online is great and all but im sure sometimes people get reduced down to numbers. Just my 2 cents
Thanks for being honest :) Let me share what is missing in the internet. There is a lot about getting a woman. And I mean A LOT. But there is not so much out there about actually keeping a woman. How to treat her to make her fulfilled. How to not react to certain things that she is doing and how to recognize them. Etc. Sadly, there is not that much about staying together, strong and happy for years. Maybe now when you have the right woman next to you, you could focus on this. There is a conflict of interest in this if she is going to watch though ;)
I'm an old school viewer from the days of Simple Programmer. I have a lot to say on this topic, and I really hope you read this. Here it goes...
First of all I just want to say I appreciate your transparency, as always.
In my opinion you should make content for those of us who have developed ourselves, found success, and are wondering what is next. I agree that many of us aren't happy when we aren't pursuing a goal. Once we do achieve it, there is often a period of happiness, but then existential dread creeps in because we aren't working towards anything anymore. Now that I lift weights, have a girlfriend, have a good software engineering job... What is next? For me personally, I am pursuing a career change and working on the question "how can I have a more positive impact on the world?" Being a software developer, especially considering the products I was working on at most jobs, felt relatively pointless in the grand scheme of things. I want to more directly help the world, help the planet, help individual people, etc.
I actually think you would be making a mistake to focus more on "helping nerds get girlfriends", masculinity, etc. You have made a ton of content already on those topics, and we have all witnessed your transformation and have learned from it. Many of us have achieved these things and are wondering what is next. How do we go to the next level. What even is the next level? There's only so much content I want to consume about getting jacked, making tons of money, picking up hot girls, etc. At the end of the day it isn't sustainable/scalable in terms of the "meaning" it provides you in life. It is more "meaningful" than playing video games all day, but it isn't an infinite supply of "meaning". I'm searching for bigger supplies of "meaning".
I think there are a ton of different directions to take it. We will probably all split off from here. Developing ourselves thus far has been like growing the base of a tree, but from here I think we all will branch out into different areas that are more meaningful for each of us as individuals. But maybe for now your next project in life could be helping us get to that next level as you work on finding what that is for yourself. Then the alignment would be back, and we would once again have the relationship with you where we feel like we are on the same journey together.
By the way, I'm using a burner account because I didn't like how watching your videos on my main account starting poisoning my youtube recommendations ("the algorithm") with sleezy pickup channels. Seeing the type of content that got recommended to me after starting to watch these videos made me realize the type of person who needs help with women. It's not pretty... there's a lot of misogyny out there, and a lot of cringe and depressing people, and frankly a lot of jerks. So I started watching your content on a private tab on this burner account. This, in itself, in my opinion, is a sign that you started going down a bad path. It's honestly not surprising to me to see you now come and say you were doing unethical things, and you aren't in a good place, etc.
I really think there is more to life than money, sex, fame, etc. Thinking about the greatest and most important events in human history, we can perhaps get some inspiration and get a better idea about what the truly meaningful things are. Abolishing slavery was fucking awesome. Landing a man on the moon was epic. Inventing the internet was a game changer. Overthrowing a monarchy and establishing a democracy turns me on. What all went into these things, who were the people involved, what did they do? How can we work towards something big and meaningful and important like that? What are the most important issues of our time? Slavery wasn't abolished by a single man. It took centuries of changing attitudes and the spread of liberal ideology, economic circumstances, political reforms, political conflicts, etc. My point being that having an impact on a seriously important issue doesn't require you to be someone as powerful as Abraham Lincoln. There were novelists who published influential stories that helped change attitudes towards abolitionism, for example. We can all play a role in something important.
Regarding motivation and discipline, just imagine how motivating it would be if you were literally fighting a war to achieve independence from rulers you despise. How can picking up women ever be as motivating as that, especially once you have achieved success with women already? If your neighbors house was on fire, I think you would be motivated to run outside and help him. Well, I think there are a ton of motivating "house fires" all over the world. I really do think, in many ways, our neighbors' houses are on fire.
TLDR: in the same way that working on masculinity is more meaningful than playing video games all day, I think there are things that are more meaningful than working on your masculinity all the time. I think pursuing those things should be your (our) next project.
I appreciate the honesty and being open .it takes alot of courage to say thy reality. I'm going through what you going through. It's a storm and it will pass .
This was such a great video, I’m so glad you published it. I know exactly the feeling of people who started out behind you and now they’re ahead of you. Everyone goes at their own pace. It’s not a race. Love your content.
Books I'd suggest you read/listen to in order while you are in this state (even if you already read/listened to them before):
1. Living Forward by Michael Hyatt
Hello John. I've been following you for years. I understand what you mean.
Honestly, I found peace 9 years ago when I understood the meaning of life: try to please our Lord, do good deeds, help the needy, being good to the relatives... This is the message of islam (I was a former Christian).
I think spirituality is a key aspect. I don't despise other religions even if I think islam is the truth, as the Quran is the last revelation after the Torah, the Gospel...
Anyways, your videos have helped me a lot.
I'm 34, have a wife and 2 kids. Once you will be a parent if God wills, your life will be different and have a deeper meaning. I hope you will experience this and become a father; I'm sure you will be a good one.
Take care and may God protect you and your family
Big balls to be so publicly vulnerable mate. It’s just a valley and a slump. Happens to the best of us. You’ll get out of it. Don’t obsess over it and just accept it as a passing season. People who’ve achieved what you have, have internal strength that doesn’t simply just vanish. Congrats, you’ve realised you’re human. Don’t beat yourself up. Just show up everyday and don’t worry about perfection and mega success etc. Momentum will occur out of the blue and you’ll be a rocket once more
I relate to the struggle. I have reached enough passive income not to have to work anymore (thanks to your advice and your pointing me toward MJ DeMarco).
At this point, metaphorically, it feels like there’s this rock on the ground. I know I can lift and move the rock around, which would be good for me. I know I can do it because I have cultivated the capacity for it and done it multiple times in the past (I might be a little rusty, though). Not only do I know I can do it, but I also know I can force myself to do it even though I don’t feel like doing it. There are also bigger rocks around, and I know I could theoretically become stronger and move then, too.
There’s this expression I used to like: “Don’t rely on your motivation; rely on your willpower.” I believe that this is true but incomplete. You can use your willpower to overcome a lack of motivation, but you can only deploy your willpower if you are motivated to do so. It’s motivation all the way down. Having the capacity for it is not enough. For example, I have enough willpower to get a degree in gender studies; I just don’t have any motivation for it. It’s not aligned with anything else in me.
Why would I force myself to do something that I don’t need? Why would I even want to become “stronger” than this? It doesn’t seem worthwhile anymore.
The answer I’m currently considering is that I should become stronger not just for my selfish self but for the sake of others, too. Strength for the sake of the people that need help. Hanzi Freinacht has an interesting concept about becoming a “social justice warrior from within” in his new book “12 commandments,” which I think is interesting ruclips.net/video/LB2_YsOOdBA/видео.html. Idk, just some ideas.. Sorry if it didn't help much.
Hey man, this one of the best videos you have ever posted. I truly respect the honesty, for me it means that you repect your audience and I don't see this happening very often with other RUclipsrs. Very mature and what a true Bulldog would do. To be honest, I've been a bit suspicious about the Bulldog concept but this right here got me to really listen
Many people think with enough growth we'll find eventually reach a point we can rest and be satisfied. John, your story shows us personal development is a life long journey. We will always have mental hardships to face, but we can gain the strength to keep on pushing along. Seeing you push through is an inspiration to us all.
You've always been someone I looked up to for so long. When im in a rut and feeling like shit I remember this video of yours where you said that if I just stick to my daily goals (running, pomodoros etc) for two weeks at the end of the two weeks I would feel substantially better and this has worked 100% of the time. Starting out is just a pain in the ass but it gets easier and at the end of the two weeks I feel like I can make significant progress in whatever I set my mind to. Good Luck my guy! Hope you come back stronger and better.
Thanks for the honesty man
Keep going ❤
You want simple? here it is:
1. If you choose to continue with 'Bulldog Mindset': Reach deep inside your mind and find the one thing you believe is the source of all success. Give it your all, be the thing's GUY, #1 in the world.
2. If you choose to start over: Close shop/Exit and let time do it's thing. Once your plate is empty you'll get hungry again.
No problems to solve anymore. Just enjoy life and share with us. That would be cool
start first with a bodily change like haircut and cleanshaven
6:50 "I can never go back and be the guy I was five years ago"
you actually can ethically too JMULV has open marriage with Liz ask him and you can still get shredded if you want. There's no physics blocking this
You need to imagine your perfect day, no limits, and get it done, that is the bulldog way I understand.
The bulldog. Gets bitten. But it Gets Back Up. Very serving man has scarves.
Life is tough. Appreciate your content brother, may you experience love with your loved ones.
I really appreciate your honesty with this. I noticed the change in videos recently and see it as a transition period.
Not much I can comment on here honestly, but on the other end I’m sure you’ll have more interesting and new things to share.
Thanks Bulldog, every video can't be a W
Went through this about 2 years ago. It’s actually bananas just how deeply seeded our habits and routines are particularly with a significant other - and how difficult it is to step out of that comfort zone. Fear of the unknown…I think that’s the primary reason people stay in situations and relationships that should have ended long ago. I’m new to your content so I’m not sure of how you were before but you’ll likely never be exactly how you used to be. You’ve grown in some way since then and are no longer that same person, not a bad thing in my opinion. To loosely quote another popular tuber “People will do more to avoid pain than they will to gain pleasure…limiting beliefs that we can’t do, or don’t deserve better keeps people imprisoned in their dysfunctional relationships because after a while - it’s all they know”. Takes a lot of courage and a strong belief to know that there’s something better out there for ourselves. Sometimes you have to crawl through the swamp to get to the beach.
Good on you too for having a friend you can talk with about it…That’s significant therapy in and of itself.
I’m a financially free real estate guy about your age. I have something that is really easy to maintain but I don’t like doing it anymore either so I really identify. We should talk.
We appreciate the honesty John, and many of us feel you on so many levels. The "helping geeks get girlfriends" idea has the most potential for positive impact for millions of young men who can't figure out how to get women. Personally, and as a programmer, I had to learn about "game" from all of the sleezey guys that i'm sure you're aware of. It's hard for me to recommend that content to my nerdy friends who can't figure out women. We're all rooting for you and looking forward to your comeback.
Even if you're not on top of things, you're still an inspiration for me and have helped me in all the areas you talk about. And I appreciate the honesty. I feel like the helping nerds get girlfriends ideas would be particularly beneficial for me 😅. A relevant quote that comes to mind is, when you win, you party, when you fail, you ponder, and all greatness come from pondering. 🤔
Really appreciate your candidness. No “you tube guru” or Andrew Tate lives an ideal life. I recently watched a Jocko podcast where he talked about a friend he had who had all sorts of bad stuff happening to him. Jocko told him his problem is he woke up in the woods and he’s just standing there figuring out where he is or what to do. Jocko said if it was him he’d just start walking. Eventually he’d hit a stream, River, road, town then he’d just figure it out. Nothing you describe is abnormal. As men were taught to internalize everything and with red pill it’s pounded into us that “nobody cares about a man’s problems” so we have to care about each other.
Great video, thanks for publishing! It felt like someone is talking my own thoughts from a slightly different perspective. Even tho we are very different it felt incredibly relatable, especially parts of not being sure if you've got what it takes to start over and the one when you compare yourself to those who focused on one thing and went way further than you did. Great stuff. We're all on a different journey in a different place of it. The end of that journey is only the moment we die. Nothing else stops it.
I believe you are on your way to creating the best content of you life. I can feel it. Man, trust yourself and take this to whatever it leads, it will be awesome. You are connected to something special right now
Hey John, speaking with Dr K from HealthyGamerGG RUclips channel could help you find direction by making you more aware of some of your unconscious thought processes. Listening to you reminded me of several concepts he's mentioned before and feel he might be able to untangle and simplify your thinking. Wish you the best.
Hey John, believe me you’re not messing up the channel with these types of videos! I think it feels more relatable to the consumer. In my opinion these types of videos are a great idea! Plus you can vent in a somewhat productive manner and not bottle shit up.
Thank you for all your advice!
People are often motivated by love. You worked your ass off, but now you have a beautiful wife. You got the ultimate goal. Motivation often falls off after this. It's tough.
Damn this is the realest video I have seen in a long time on RUclips. You are really brave for being vulnerable like this, and honestly this is when RUclips is at its best.
I want to say that I have been a long time follower since SP and you have helped me immensely with everything from philosophy, handling relationships, to becoming a programmer and getting that job, for that I want to say thank you.
But just like you felt back in the day before starting SP, I am also now starting to feel that I don't want to be a code monkey for the rest of my life. I enjoy programming but I have other passions I want to pursue more such as indie game dev, and most importantly be financially free. For me personally I would love to see videos about that specific transition from wage slaving to creating your own business, everything from mindset, choosing the right endeavor, to handling it economically. One particular topic I am curious about is if RUclips really is the only option to be financially free nowadays. TechLead is pretending that he's not reliant on RUclips and that he is retired because of all his side hustles but when you look around I think many don't want to admit that it is all only possible because of RUclips, I really think RUclips/social media is the main gate to get out of the typical 9-5 job nowadays.
And finally, I have been struggling a lot as well with what to focus on. I was aimless throughout my whole 20s and finally when I turned 31 I got a programming job after self studying hard for 2 years. You have already showed me with this video how important that it is to put your focus on one thing. I feel like this is something that is not talked about more. Regardless what content you decide to make, I will always be a follower because you are the realest G in this space. Big thank you once again.
Make mindset videos.
Because we all need the right mindset to pursue success.
I will watch all your mindset videos.
Everytime John is speaking to us through the camera, he really feels like a big brother guiding us... For some reason whatever what he say's, I just trust him and I don't second guess his intentions. Personal message to you John no matter what you are going through you are always in my heart and such an inspiration, I love you bro!
You just started to kick asses bro!!!! Keep Rocking! Focus on one thing! Cut your hair, shave, and start from beginning! 😊
Hey John,
Sorry I got a bit late to reply to this, I wanted to reply sooner but wanted to spend some time to think about this. You are an amazing role model and mentor to me, and your videos/wisdom have helped me learn/grow immensely since my teenage years (26 now), thank you so much for your amazing work so far. I am sorry for the pain of the seperation you are going through, and the difficulty of this massive transition in your life, but I know that after you get through this it will get better and you will have a much more happy and fulfilling relationship/life.
I fully understand the feeling of stagnation/peaking you are experiencing. Sometimes it feels like you are stuck in the same spot and can't progress despite the amount of hard work you put in. I have been there many times, and am in a similar boat myself right now. One thing that really stood out out to me was when you said you lost your identity. I think this might be because of those other aspects of your life being affected by this (i.e. fitness, diet, business, productivity, etc). Such times are extremely rough but as you said, we have to let our lower self do its thing, and in our higher self we need to remember things will get better and steer ourselves towards where we need to reach. After you find your direction and get these things in order again, I am sure you will feel like a "kick ass mother fucker" guy again, altough I still see you as one :P
You mentioned that you are thinking of dedicating your focus onto specific problems, such as helping nerds get dates. Although at the moment I am a girlfriend-less nerd myself at the moment, I feel like you have so much more wisdom to share. I enjoy all your content - from relationship advice, to your life advice, to your financial lessons. Perhaps it would be cool if you made a series on nerds and dating, but the rest of your content is amazing too. This is just my thought though, at the end of the day I hope you do whatever fulfills you, and helps you succeed/progress the most. I will watch regardless of whatever you do :P
Hang in there brother, I believe in you and know you will come back stronger and better, and with hard work and dedication you will reach the next levels!
My advice would be to take a day or a week how long necessary to clean up your life before deciding what to do next. Start with cleaning your house, closets, cupboards, kitchen, computer files, your e-mails, your systems etc. until everything is neat and tidy and clarity will emerge itself. It is shocking what it can do to your mind.
Hey John,
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings so genuinely. You are kind of a role model for me since many years and you've influenced my thoughts and beliefs through your videos, podcasts (especially Entreprogrammers) and books. This phase that you're going through right now will certainly also improve you. Maybe not in a bulldog way, but somehow deeper on an emotional level. I hope you will keep sharing your wisdom with us. Your unique experiences can help so many of us in different areas of our lifes.
Appreciate your honesty. Vids like this do more for me than anything else, just to show that it's okay if you're not perfect. I've been struggling for 2 years. Lost my business and 40 staff, 10 years of work and toil, my amazing partner, many friends and all of my wealth. I feel guilty for not springing back into action and crushing, but I honestly just don't feel up to it right now. I haven't stopped moving forward. I own 2 properties and earn 200k (AUD), 120 USD, so I'm OK, but I'm not crushing. Far from it. Drinking, not exercising, sporadically eating healthy then shiite. I feel like a farkin failure. But I have progressed, I am getting a hold on it, but it's disappointing that I didn't bounce back like a farkin cyborg. That's the truth of it.
Thank you for the video, John and for being so transparent. Stay strong, sir.
I'm going through the exact same thing but I slowly got back on track in September and I'm feeling happy again.
I think that how you feel it's completely normal. You are a great man and helped a lot of people, but "just a human after all" as Rag n bone man says....
Hey John, from the way your describing the way you feel, I've felt similar and I realized the problem for me was being too obsessive and self critical, it seemed like the right thing to do but it wasn't for me. I started being nicer to myself and then my mind started finding its way back center after that.
Go back to psycho cybernetics and review that chapters on the automatic success mechanism and automatic failure mechanism within the mind, specifically the part on the real self vs the actual self, he explains it in a way that helped me.
Hey brother, when I was 21 I was super down about never having a girlfriend and your videos really gave me the mindset I needed to finally get one. (That and micro dosing shrooms) so I’m very thankful 🙏
First of all I would like to say John how much I appreciate your authenticity and truth
I even look up to you more now as it takes a lot to share the place you at
I'm a long time fan and a member of the bulldog mindset and what I love the most about your content is mindset and stoic philosophy
I watched all the mindset videos on bulldog mindset around 4 times and they are really life changing
I had so many hard moments in business, girls, parents, covid and etc and your mindset videos were always there to help me
I feel like no matter what your problem is in life it all comes to mindset, because your mindset determines your view on life which determines your actions
You can see it all the time with girls and business, you can tell someone exactly what to do, a step by step formula, if he doesn't have the right mindset he will fail
With all the respect to you and believe me I have a lot, I feel like with fitness, women and business your advice is amazing but I have other people who focus only on those subjects and have better advice.
When it comes to mindset I feel like you are my best source of knowledge, I would get any content or program you will have on mindset in a sec
I really hope you can come up with something like this, I already watched your mindset lessons on the bulldog mindset program a few times so I need new videos hahaha
Thank you for helping me so much throughout the years and like you say, it's just a cycle, your next cycle will be even bigger and better than you ever had
Much love, take care bro ❤
What a wholesome video. I'm truly glad you did publish it.
I can relate to most of the things you talk about and after watching this I'll question my life even more :D.
Answering your question:
Lately I'm getting the vibe that you served in legion and survived through the retirement. You don't have will to fight wars any more but you still get fired up thinking and talking about it. When you talk about it you are ready to strap the sward and run towards battlefield but then you stop, think and acknowledge that... that is just the past.
I neither think nor feel that teaching geeks how to get girls will fully suit you.
I'm following you non stop since 2015 and I've seen the progression, growth, changes and almost all that channel went through (I don't know what was going on before that, never watched your video that are that old) and teaching geeks how to get girls just doesn't sit right when I think about it.
That would be something that you'll be successful in but I think that if you do that you'll soon make part two of this video.
From all the content you published, what I liked the most was on masculinity and discipline.
Yes pickup content was good but I never watched you just because of it.
Maybe you don't want/can/feel like you can fight battles/wars any more but your life experiences aren't in vain.
You may as well be older man that's initiating younger man into masculinity.
That is what I think and feel will suit you best.
Initiating men into masculinity, that is lost in todays world and nobody does it.
Everyone talks about masculinity but hardly anybody experienced enough of life to know it's essence and initiate other.
Path of passage.
In most regards you are THE guy to do this.
I was thinking about this couple of times watching some of your videos and being in coaching calls.
This opinion isn't formed based just on this video.
I think that you can regain bulldog mindset that you had but the direction needs to be a more grounded, settled, calmer, quieter.
John, I have been into self development since I discovered the pua community in 2014, and after seeing so many people in the self help community over the years, I am very selective about who I follow and respect in that community. You are one of the few.
What I find unique about you and what intrigues me the most in your content is your mindset/strong understanding of masculinity and what it means to be a man. I don’t see this deep understanding of masculinity elsewhere in the men’s self help community. One of the key videos that hooked me early on was the concept of killing off your father.
I think your understanding of masculinity should be the foundation of your path ahead. It is rare to find and very impactful/life changing.
Man I felt this so much bro. Everything you said you’re doing I’m doing after having that bulldog mindset. I feel like I lost myself this past year. But the only thing we can do is be man, an keep pushing through everything.
Hey John, I've been following you since the early Simple Programmer days and you were always an inspiration to me. We all go through such difficult times; I also experienced a tough period in the past year but the bulldog is there ready to come back stronger than ever. Your brightest days are still ahead of you! Keep up the great work!
I really appreciated this video, it just shows that even if you are on top of the world with a ton of different side incomes, amazing body, marathon running and picking up chicks, we all can 'fall' of the wagon every once in a while. Please don't get rid of that stuff, perhaps just hire a consultant to downsize it and make it more sleek. You are in a very fortunate position financially so you can just take a sabbatical, go for a little travel, maybe take up meditation practice, hire a high ticket high performance coach. At the very least this vid has inspired me to get multiple streams of income so thanks for that Bdog!
John, I’ve been following “red pill” or men’s self improvement topics since abt 2019. Having listen to most of the big names in the space and even paid money for product from some of them, I genuinely think you are the best and most balanced content creator in this space. To be honest I think your current content, although it may seem “all over the place” is pretty good, because honestly, life is multifaceted and there are so many different issues a man has to deal with. I believe what ever you do will continue to help men. I think what someone else in the comments has suggested would be nice - keep Bulldog Mindset as it is and have a separate channel for the other content. only thing i would suggest is maybe expand to it to a more general “masculine for geeks” topic. I think lots of guys nowadays are geeky in some way whether it’s likely video games or movies too much or whatever, and masculine advice starting from that perspective would be helpful.
My man, Im only 10 minutes through this vid. All I can say is that I wish the best for your future and Im convinced that with your passion for live and honesty about your struggles, things will turn out just fine. Im a young sportsman going through a confusing, rough time as well, and seeing an idol like you struggling and feeling deep pain as well, just makes me more optimistic about the world. Its all how its supposed to be and we will emerge wiser, fullfilled and more compassionate.
John, this message is from an older Bulldog in his mid-50s. You are very authentic and I appreciate your candor and straightforward message. I have always appreciated this about you. You've helped many men and we thank you for your hard work. You have the courage to make videos that go against the PC culture. I have gained insight to many things you have shared and it's been helpful.
I have found for me that you can chase more money, more useful work challenges, the next thing but there seems to be a spiritual vacuum with you (in my opinion). Only Jesus Christ can fill that vacuum. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. That whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have eternal life"-John 3:16. You have created a great life for you and your family, what about eternity?
A personal relationship with Jesus Christ can fill that void. You always tell us bulldogs to be straightforward so I am being straight forward also. You're a great guy and you've helped me in my life.
Godspeed,
Brian Taylor
Oceanside CA
I'm only 9 mins in and this is far better than anything ive seen all year.