Hey Kenneth! Hope you are well. If you and your ex do love each other and YOU can tell even if she’s rebounding. Is it okay to take them back after you working on yourself hard and changing your mindset and views on life? I mean I love her and have been working on myself a lot. But she’s avoiding and distracting herself with a rebound so, what would even happen if we do take them back?
Iv got a question it's been 6 weeks since my husband and I separated He was encoring me playing video games never helped me it was like a roommate situation I tried talk to him but he would call his mom she would call me lol So I stopped connecting I went down got my divorce papers yesterday Do u think 6 weeks is to soon to file ? It was like this for a long time I tried to fix it but I was the only one nothing was changing on his part he had better friendships with the people on Xbox than he had with his wife the person standing right in front of him . He said he's not in love with me anymore he wants a girl with no children who rides motorcycles and plays video games It was 8 years married
I used to do this exactly. Your videos really helped me face myself and stop reaching out and learn how to self sooth. Anxious attachment I didn't know I even had. He has since periodically reached out and I have written back and that's about all of it. But I feel so much better learning about myself from You guys. You're just the best without preaching any sort of games etc. I still have feelings for him, but since I realize he is probably Avoidant, I now understand that intense hot and then cold that happened so suddenly and that it's not all my fault. That gives me peace. :)
He left me 3 months ago, and I am in no contact since. He broke no contact on the 1st of January to wish me a happy new year. I've answered back wishing him a happy new year too, but since then nothing has happened and I'm back in no contact. I think he sent the message just to be polite and he doesn't really cares anymore. Happy New year
Cant believe how much time has passed since i watched one of Craig’s videos, damn… around sep 2021 was my break up of an 8 year relationship, i was so desperate OMG… long story short, she never reach out to me and thank god she didn’t (my past self wouldnt say this at all LOL)… im in a much better place now, FOCUS ON YOURSELF THATS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING, its so hard at the beginning, u really need to work hard on yourself and let time pass. I wouldn’t go back with my ex like NEVER, this is the best thing that has ever happen. (New me, new job, healthier, stronger, happier, more social, close with friends and family etc). Thanks Craig!
Not reaching out is so difficult, in many different scenarios, whether it's about small things, or when you're in a better place, I've got to a better place and look back so fondly on it, and I'd love to reach out to thank her for everything she did for me, and how she pushed me- but this would break no contact and is so difficult to not do, or think about doing.
same here, I'm getting so much better if only I was like this prior to the breakup... 2 months since the BU and 1 month no contact, I texted 4 time trying to meet her, wrote a handwritten letter to apologize of my behaviour during the relationship but not asking for a second chance but she answered to the letter quite coldly thanking me for the letter, saying that she has no more feelings for me and wished me all the best.. I was so devastated when I saw her answer I mean I wasn't expecting a happy outcome but man I fought the urge to call her after her answer but I stayed strong.. 28 days NC since she answered to the letter..
I just booked an email coaching, but I’m still trying to figure out what to write 😂. My ex kept me as a FWB for 4 months, we’ve been broken up for 5. At one point he told me he was breaking up with his new gf and wanted to get back together, he did this twice, but both times failed to break it off with his new gf. After the second time I told him to F off and he used that to spin the break up around on me. So now he’s acting like I’m the dumper! We’ve hooked up a few times even after that. But now I’m done and have been in limited contact (we have children together) for 2 weeks. Just like Craig and Victoria says, I am done being the only one trying to fix this connection. Stay strong everyone! You will get through it, everything will pass ❤
Why would someone want to take an avoidant ex back especially after the dumpee has done their part and grown and has been patient? Especially given that the ex has essentially disrespected and mistreated their partner and violated the relationship and has shown poor integrity and a lack of development and skills. Why desire the ex? If he did it once, he is capable of leaving again. He has shown he is limited in his ability to partner and grow. Yes, some can grow slowly if they choose, but the damage done to the ex from their past experiences, harms the dumpee. We each have a moral responsibility to heal ourselves so we do not harm others. Be honest with yourself about whether it really is a good idea to want an ex back even if they are a good person underneath all their pain and dysfunction.
So for all the discussion about avoidants from these coaches, do either of them think the guy could be classic avoidant with his non-committing attitude? I mean??? These type of personalities can really mess with someone. He’s trying to friend-zone her and that’s a hard place to be.
Hey coach Craig and Victoria! I wanna say thank you for helping me keep the NC. Lately I've been feeling some anxiety, and now I see I gotta go back to your channel and do the work 💕
Can you guys make a video about a breakup when it’s mutual because we both weren’t meeting each other’s needs. But unexpectedly, one regrets the decision…should that person reach out or continue NC and continue the hope that the ex will come into the realization and have them reach out first. 😢
Yeah...four months after the BU and I still kept breaking NC. But then I got ghosted and I said look, I need to get a grip. So my bday is in two months. I've told myself I'll reach out then. I won't, I have another deadline set after that. So I'm trying this method while continuing to work on myself, and using the workbooks. But damn if that anxiety doesn't hit sometimes...
I have been in this guy’s seat recently.....I am not proud to admit it, but I don’t block my ex because I am petty and get a thrill from watching him chase me. In my case, he cheated and never wanted to commit, so yes I am enjoying watching him grovel now, he has been for almost 6 months and probably is not even done yet. My friends and I laugh at him, and he has zero chance. I believe Craig could be giving the man in this scenerio too much credit....
@@shevaunnewilson yes, he continues to reach out, just did YESTERDAY!!! No, I’ve never gone back, but I still will lead him on and then ignore him. Probably a lousy every two weeks he tries, depends on the day whether I reply or not. First week in May I let him think I was going to meet him out and then ignored him all day and night, probably 10 times. He was furious, but then two weeks later I got a “Happy Mothers Day!”.....again, this man was evil to me, I probably don’t even know the extent of it, so don’t forget that. I am not sure when this will stop for good, but like I said just yesterday he did another indirect/direct and I ignored it. Sometimes he calls, sometimes he flat out says Would you like to go to a nice dinner etc? Sometimes a random “I miss you”.....sometimes one of our pics meant to trigger emotion, he has tried EVERYTHING, at least 100 times, I’ve lost count.
Be careful. Some stalkers escalate to violence. Personally I would keep a log of each contact in case it escalates and you need to involve police, ask him once politely to never contact again, and then ignore him. But you do you.
I reached out many times from no contact and my wife blocked me at one point and she doesnt want to get back with me. I couldnt control my anxiety and i feel like im dieing.
I been doing no contact but my girlfriend and my mom had spoke to each other on New Years. Does that count as me contacting her? We obviously didn’t speak at all
Hey coach Craig. I use to watch ur video .my boyfriend breakup me.jan/03 2023. and he call me on my birthday Jan/14/ to till 17/ We talk each other. and 18 he give me miss call. And I call him back he didn't respond and no call back. When I ask him to breakup he's said I'm not gonna breakup u .and if I'm not get married u . My hold life not gonna married. Blah blah. Than why he's stay silent I don't understand. We both no contact 1 month. 2 week . I really missing him 😪😪 what shoul I do 😰😭
Please someone help me! 🤣 my ex and i were together for a year and he broke up with me a week ago. 2 days ago he sent me a message saying “there’s not a second in his day where he’s not thinking about me and the beauty i brought into his life, how he misses all the little things we shared together because they mean so much more.. i could go on and on but i don’t deserve any more of your time so i’ll let you be” he knows i saw it, but i didn’t respond. I’m not sure if i should yet? I’m a mess, absolutely heartbroken. I know coach craig says not to ignore your ex but this isn’t really telling me anything i didn’t already heard him say. I told him i wanted to work things out and salvage the relationship but he said he can’t and maybe we can be friends. I told him no, i can’t do that because i’ll always want there to be more and i’ll be strung along. What do i do? Do i respond? And what do i say? Please help, thank you so much
Iv got a question it's been 6 weeks since my husband and I separated He was encoring me playing video games never helped me it was like a roommate situation I tried talk to him but he would call his mom she would call me lol So I stopped connecting I went down got my divorce papers yesterday Do u think 6 weeks is to soon to file ? It was like this for a long time I tried to fix it but I was the only one nothing was changing on his part he had better friendships with the people on Xbox than he had with his wife the person standing right in front of him . He said he's not in love with me anymore he wants a girl with no children who rides motorcycles and plays video games It was 8 years married
Take a moment to subscribe to the channel. And you can always get help on my website
Hey Kenneth! Hope you are well. If you and your ex do love each other and YOU can tell even if she’s rebounding. Is it okay to take them back after you working on yourself hard and changing your mindset and views on life? I mean I love her and have been working on myself a lot. But she’s avoiding and distracting herself with a rebound so, what would even happen if we do take them back?
Iv got a question it's been 6 weeks since my husband and I separated
He was encoring me playing video games never helped me it was like a roommate situation
I tried talk to him but he would call his mom she would call me lol
So I stopped connecting
I went down got my divorce papers yesterday
Do u think 6 weeks is to soon to file ?
It was like this for a long time I tried to fix it but I was the only one nothing was changing on his part he had better friendships with the people on Xbox than he had with his wife the person standing right in front of him . He said he's not in love with me anymore he wants a girl with no children who rides motorcycles and plays video games
It was 8 years married
Where is Margaret ?
@@bernieoconnell5515 I'm sorry to tell this, but she passed away 🥺😔😥
i wish we had like a community where we can all chat and console each other
Craig needs to have a convention or retreat I agree!!! And we do a big group hug! 🤣🙌😭❤️
Craig should consider a Discord or Facebook group
@@DavidJarvis01 Yes, a discord server would be fantastic 🙌🤩
@@DavidJarvis01 Agree, a discord server would be cool
@@pamelawinter4956 a break up retreat sounds amazing. That’s actually a really good idea
I broke no contact and I truly wish I didn’t .
Slowly ghosted without a "breakup" conversation. So hurtful. Cannot stop thinking about it.
Same thing happened to me. In 2018. I still can’t stop thinking about it. Be strong
Only a narcissist would do this keeping an open mind loop
How long were you seeing them? Was it an exclusive relationship as far as you know?
@@christopherbullens5494 wow, 5 years and still thinking about it? And here I thought I was extreme for thinking for about 2.5 years :D
@@christopherbullens5494 did you get into another relationship during these years?
I used to do this exactly. Your videos really helped me face myself and stop reaching out and learn how to self sooth. Anxious attachment I didn't know I even had. He has since periodically reached out and I have written back and that's about all of it. But I feel so much better learning about myself from You guys. You're just the best without preaching any sort of games etc. I still have feelings for him, but since I realize he is probably Avoidant, I now understand that intense hot and then cold that happened so suddenly and that it's not all my fault. That gives me peace. :)
He left me 3 months ago, and I am in no contact since. He broke no contact on the 1st of January to wish me a happy new year. I've answered back wishing him a happy new year too, but since then nothing has happened and I'm back in no contact. I think he sent the message just to be polite and he doesn't really cares anymore.
Happy New year
I didn’t break NC a lot but I did. But starting today I will never break NC again. He will never hear from me again.
Cant believe how much time has passed since i watched one of Craig’s videos, damn… around sep 2021 was my break up of an 8 year relationship, i was so desperate OMG… long story short, she never reach out to me and thank god she didn’t (my past self wouldnt say this at all LOL)… im in a much better place now, FOCUS ON YOURSELF THATS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING, its so hard at the beginning, u really need to work hard on yourself and let time pass. I wouldn’t go back with my ex like NEVER, this is the best thing that has ever happen. (New me, new job, healthier, stronger, happier, more social, close with friends and family etc).
Thanks Craig!
James Bond here… if I were you , I would listen keenly to coach Craig and the lovely coach Victoria 🥰
Not reaching out is so difficult, in many different scenarios, whether it's about small things, or when you're in a better place, I've got to a better place and look back so fondly on it, and I'd love to reach out to thank her for everything she did for me, and how she pushed me- but this would break no contact and is so difficult to not do, or think about doing.
same here, I'm getting so much better if only I was like this prior to the breakup...
2 months since the BU and 1 month no contact, I texted 4 time trying to meet her, wrote a handwritten letter to apologize of my behaviour during the relationship but not asking for a second chance but she answered to the letter quite coldly thanking me for the letter, saying that she has no more feelings for me and wished me all the best..
I was so devastated when I saw her answer I mean I wasn't expecting a happy outcome but man I fought the urge to call her after her answer but I stayed strong.. 28 days NC since she answered to the letter..
I just booked an email coaching, but I’m still trying to figure out what to write 😂. My ex kept me as a FWB for 4 months, we’ve been broken up for 5. At one point he told me he was breaking up with his new gf and wanted to get back together, he did this twice, but both times failed to break it off with his new gf. After the second time I told him to F off and he used that to spin the break up around on me. So now he’s acting like I’m the dumper! We’ve hooked up a few times even after that. But now I’m done and have been in limited contact (we have children together) for 2 weeks.
Just like Craig and Victoria says, I am done being the only one trying to fix this connection. Stay strong everyone! You will get through it, everything will pass ❤
Sounds like a very challenging situation with your ex. Any updates?
Why would someone want to take an avoidant ex back especially after the dumpee has done their part and grown and has been patient? Especially given that the ex has essentially disrespected and mistreated their partner and violated the relationship and has shown poor integrity and a lack of development and skills. Why desire the ex? If he did it once, he is capable of leaving again. He has shown he is limited in his ability to partner and grow. Yes, some can grow slowly if they choose, but the damage done to the ex from their past experiences, harms the dumpee. We each have a moral responsibility to heal ourselves so we do not harm others. Be honest with yourself about whether it really is a good idea to want an ex back even if they are a good person underneath all their pain and dysfunction.
Dont chase...silent is louder and move on and go fishing again
I’m in a similar situation for 3 years now. I needed to hear this.
So for all the discussion about avoidants from these coaches, do either of them think the guy could be classic avoidant with his non-committing attitude? I mean??? These type of personalities can really mess with someone. He’s trying to friend-zone her and that’s a hard place to be.
I broke no contact more times than I can count. I feel like a butt
Same man....four months
Hey coach Craig and Victoria! I wanna say thank you for helping me keep the NC. Lately I've been feeling some anxiety, and now I see I gotta go back to your channel and do the work 💕
Can you guys make a video about a breakup when it’s mutual because we both weren’t meeting each other’s needs. But unexpectedly, one regrets the decision…should that person reach out or continue NC and continue the hope that the ex will come into the realization and have them reach out first. 😢
Your situation is so hard…
This is my first breakup where I didn't beg them, didn't ask any explanatios and got straight to no contact. Day 2, it's not that bad yet
P.S. but I had a dream last night where I was reaching out 😂 crazy
@@booksteaphd1613 whats the update? did you make it 1 month no contact?
Any update
Yeah...four months after the BU and I still kept breaking NC.
But then I got ghosted and I said look, I need to get a grip.
So my bday is in two months. I've told myself I'll reach out then. I won't, I have another deadline set after that.
So I'm trying this method while continuing to work on myself, and using the workbooks.
But damn if that anxiety doesn't hit sometimes...
METALLICA !! You rock Victoria !!
He needs to block her for his own sake and hers. She has a point tbh.
I have been in this guy’s seat recently.....I am not proud to admit it, but I don’t block my ex because I am petty and get a thrill from watching him chase me. In my case, he cheated and never wanted to commit, so yes I am enjoying watching him grovel now, he has been for almost 6 months and probably is not even done yet. My friends and I laugh at him, and he has zero chance. I believe Craig could be giving the man in this scenerio too much credit....
I'm curious. How did this work out? Did he keep groveling? Did you go back?
@@shevaunnewilson yes, he continues to reach out, just did YESTERDAY!!! No, I’ve never gone back, but I still will lead him on and then ignore him. Probably a lousy every two weeks he tries, depends on the day whether I reply or not. First week in May I let him think I was going to meet him out and then ignored him all day and night, probably 10 times. He was furious, but then two weeks later I got a “Happy Mothers Day!”.....again, this man was evil to me, I probably don’t even know the extent of it, so don’t forget that. I am not sure when this will stop for good, but like I said just yesterday he did another indirect/direct and I ignored it. Sometimes he calls, sometimes he flat out says Would you like to go to a nice dinner etc? Sometimes a random “I miss you”.....sometimes one of our pics meant to trigger emotion, he has tried EVERYTHING, at least 100 times, I’ve lost count.
@@number1fan19the villain era I’m trying to be on, you go girl
@@chisomoffor6877 it makes me feel better.....I know it’s unhealthy, but I can’t stop myself....
Be careful. Some stalkers escalate to violence.
Personally I would keep a log of each contact in case it escalates and you need to involve police, ask him once politely to never contact again, and then ignore him. But you do you.
I reached out many times from no contact and my wife blocked me at one point and she doesnt want to get back with me. I couldnt control my anxiety and i feel like im dieing.
Update?
So sorry, I can relate, you’re not alone.
She’s like me. Txting my ex once every 2 weeks. 😔
I been doing no contact but my girlfriend and my mom had spoke to each other on New Years. Does that count as me contacting her? We obviously didn’t speak at all
No, it doesn't count
Hey coach Craig. I use to watch ur video .my boyfriend breakup me.jan/03 2023. and he call me on my birthday Jan/14/ to till 17/ We talk each other. and 18 he give me miss call. And I call him back he didn't respond and no call back. When I ask him to breakup he's said I'm not gonna breakup u .and if I'm not get married u . My hold life not gonna married. Blah blah. Than why he's stay silent I don't understand. We both no contact 1 month. 2 week . I really missing him 😪😪 what shoul I do 😰😭
Great video...
Please someone help me! 🤣 my ex and i were together for a year and he broke up with me a week ago. 2 days ago he sent me a message saying “there’s not a second in his day where he’s not thinking about me and the beauty i brought into his life, how he misses all the little things we shared together because they mean so much more.. i could go on and on but i don’t deserve any more of your time so i’ll let you be” he knows i saw it, but i didn’t respond. I’m not sure if i should yet? I’m a mess, absolutely heartbroken. I know coach craig says not to ignore your ex but this isn’t really telling me anything i didn’t already heard him say. I told him i wanted to work things out and salvage the relationship but he said he can’t and maybe we can be friends. I told him no, i can’t do that because i’ll always want there to be more and i’ll be strung along. What do i do? Do i respond? And what do i say? Please help, thank you so much
Coach Victoria looking stunning as always!
I messed up bad! I blew her up and showed up at her house twice. Im so ashamed. Her family is scared of me and she is as well.
I was doing so well and accidentally called her fuck…. Now anxiety is at a thousand
Are these guys talking about it's upto your ex to repair the connection...is that if they dumped you? How come it isn't upto you to try?
It's up to this dumper to fix it. If the dumpee tries it looks weak and doesn't respect their decision and they don't get a chance to miss you.
Iv got a question it's been 6 weeks since my husband and I separated
He was encoring me playing video games never helped me it was like a roommate situation
I tried talk to him but he would call his mom she would call me lol
So I stopped connecting
I went down got my divorce papers yesterday
Do u think 6 weeks is to soon to file ?
It was like this for a long time I tried to fix it but I was the only one nothing was changing on his part he had better friendships with the people on Xbox than he had with his wife the person standing right in front of him . He said he's not in love with me anymore he wants a girl with no children who rides motorcycles and plays video games
It was 8 years married
Dynamic duo
What do you do if you work in same area and have mutual patients that you may have to discuss?
Hi to u happy new year like to hear from u
Do Men feel like this too
Or Just Women?
As a man I can tell you I did almost all the things the woman in this video did, so yeah, men feel like this too.
Or that means that I am over him and don t considere him as a potential partner
Is this live?