Realistically, self identifying as autistic is just step 1 for adults in their diagnostic journey. We didn't get caught in childhood for whatever reason, and for me at least, was trying to figure out what the heck was going on in my brain that was making life so difficult. Figuring that out & self identifying took *months* of research, listening to productions from autistic people & doctors & researchers & institutions & taking the science based tests & connecting the dots in my life. I wrote papers on how my life experiences fit the diagnostic criteria. All of that let me self identify as probably autistic (and eventually adhd too). Then, *after* I self identified, I had to figure out if pursuing a formal diagnosis was right for me & being an American with no health insurance if I could even afford it. I decided it was important. Total cost for my diagnosis in Texas ended up over $1500 and I was given help from family paying, massive discounts from the medical provider, and I'm on a payment plan to finish covering cost. Being able to do that was *still* a privilege. Oh, and even though I'm in a major city, choices for where to go get diagnosed where not great. I found 1 in town that claimed to have the knowledge on diagnosing adults. Anyway, my point with this was that pretty much all of us who actually went and got diagnosed later in life started by self identifying. You aren't going to go through the frustration or cost of getting a diagnosis without thinking you might be autistic 1st.
I'm happy that I wasn't diagnosed in my childhood or even after... would have been no good for me. There was, and there is still such a poor aknowledgment and huge misunderstanding. I will not search for a diagnosis either. It's just so fine to get to know about this just a few months ago, unexpectedlly, now that I'm 51.I just want to know how to live a better life at this precious moment when everything becomes clear and full of sense. Thanks to every voice, and thanks for every story, cause I find myself a bit in them.
I mean, isn't self-diagnosis the first step to being diagnosed with a lot of things? "My ankle hurts from when I landed on it funny yesterday, I think it's sprained." "I get this horrible headaches that make me vomit and are only on one side of my head, I think they're migraines." Why should autism be any different? I self-diagnosed as ADHD for over a year before I got a diagnosis and now I think I'm actually AuDHD but not sure I'll bother to be diagnosed since I'm already ND. And also for all the reasons Rose and AutisticAF mentioned, because it's expensive and a pain to try to find a good clinician who knows much about autism. Anyway, I love this video, it's really excellent. What a giant jack-hole that so-called "comedian" is, and not funny at all. You're absolutely right, AutisticAF, that "Comedy is at its best when it punches up and not down." I've added this to my list of good quotes that I find all over the internet. And that "OG autistic" clip...hilarious!
@ewestner - excellent point on self diagnosis in general. Rose, I happy you finally got your official Dx! I have a friend my age (I'm 62) who would like to get evaluated and your experience helps to put that in perspective. I'm also low income, but I'm not sure I will ever seek a diagnosis. Maybe due to my ADHD Dx 2 years ago? I think for me, that's enough validation of my neuro-spiciness. I am certain I am autistic as well, but not sure what an official Dx would get me other than the paper to shut up people who say "you can't be autistic." My ADHD meds and Dx (and consequently feeling different/ better about myself) as well as learning tools to cope and manage have gone a long way to ease my Major Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety, and autism fills the spaces/conflicts that don't align with ADHD.
What we all forget is most diagnosis start with a self diagnosis. Like, Hey Doc, I think I sprained my ankle. I think my kid is sick. I think I'm pregnant, I think I have a rash... What, are we not supposed to NOT THINK? NOT INVESTIGATE? NOT be CURIOUS? This is all so ridiculous. And with the barriers to getting a diagnosis for Autism, of course most of us stay at Self Diagnosed, Self Idendifying. It's the people who choose to make fun of the normal part of society, normal part of being human, that are the problem of society. And the fact that he put himself on a platform to be laughed at and then mad fun of people just makes it worse. Comedy should punch up, not down. And he masks it behind laughing at TikTok. What a Bully.
Haha, I just used the sprained ankle example in a comment too! Because I agree completely. And hey, you wouldn't go to the doctor for a suspected sprained ankle if your ankles weren't bothering you, right? "Hey, doc, I'm not in pain or limping or anything but would you check on my ankles to make sure they're working correctly?" "Hey doc, my throat doesn't hurt at all but maybe do a strep test?" Would you bother jumping through all the hoops to get an autism diagnosis if you didn't think you might be autistic? Um....no.
When i went to the ER with a kidney stone and the nurses asked me what was wrong, I just listed off symptoms. They doubled down, asked me to GUESS what I THINK I have! I told them I was in so much pain that I couldn't think straight. They insisted, saying the worst case scenario was that I guessed wrong and that my guess would take them one step closer to the correct solution. I actively tried to avoid self diagnosing and medical staff BEGGED for me to throw a wild guess out into the air. And they were right. Thanks to my initial wrong guess, they were able to determine that the source of my pain was located around my kidneys and was not caused by any sort of internal rupture.
You're supposed to go to the doctor every month or so and sit quietly while they figure it out on their own without your unqualified input on your own life experience
In my ADHD eval when I said I wanted to pursue an autism eval as well, she said "you can't be autistic, you look people in the eyes." (Actually, I don't- I look at their mouths.)
My best friend was denied diagnosis for having too many friends All his friends are neurodiverse!! He struggles to make friends with neurotypicals. He even told the doctor this & they said it was irrelevant bc autistic ppl are basically hated by every person they meet.
I self-diagnosed as gay. I consider it perfectly valid. I treat my autism the same way. Both being gay and autistic explain so much and have made me a lot happier about myself. The autism identification has been useful for relatives to understand me, I have been told. I’m 64. I realised I was autistic only 2 years ago. What point is there in a formal diagnosis?
Self-diagnosed as gay. I like that one. And how can we possibly argue with that? Strange thought that being gay once was seen as a disability and even was included in a very early version of the DSM. I'm glad that is no longer so.
I have pretty severe ADHD (tested at 5, parents refused treatment, finally got treatment at 21) but at that time you couldn’t get a dual diagnosis so I just beat myself up thinking I was weird or stupid. Dipped in and out of the research for several years before being okay wish self-diagnosis because I didn’t want to be That Person or whatever. Re-evaluating everything from an autistic perspective has helped so much of my brain work better, I didn’t even know emotional regulation was a possible thing, simple changes for sensory things have made a world of difference and I can see where my thought processes differ with others and compute between the two much more gracefully. I am in a more rural area now and can’t drive (legally blind) so a formal diagnosis would be fairly difficult, expensive, and not really change much for me. I’m far more interested in learning the adaptive strategies for myself and for interacting with others so I can make cool stuff and enjoy my life. Sorry for the rant, lol, just still convincing myself that’s okay I guess. 😅
Hey Lexi - honestly that’s so relatable! Simply knowing about sensory and emotional regulation and how it’s possible and techniques to assist us is empowering. -Mike
I see a lot of myself in this comment, with the most notable difference being that I don't have any issues that keep me from driving so I'm more mobile to come and go from my rural home. I'm glad you're finding peace and self-understanding, and are pursuing things that are so meaningful to yourself. These things are making all the difference for me, too.
I had a "mid life crisis" at 50, and my GP couldn't be bothered to make any effort to find out the cause. 5 years later I did the Aspi Quiz after hearing a trailer for a radio programme on autism, and took it to another GP who just gave me a blank look. It took another 8 years, and two attempts, to get my diagnosis (at 63). I didn't want to accept I was autistic without a diagnosis, so up to that point another 13 years of my life had been wasted, and more harm done. 3 years later I was starting to realise that autism didn't explain everything about my life, and self-diagnosed myself with ADHD. I've been on the NHS waiting list for that for a year, with another 3 years to wait, so tomorrow I have a private assessment that I've only had to wait 5 weeks for. Anyone who tries to tell me that self-diagnosis is invalid is likely to learn some new, and pretty obscene, language, that I started to learn in school playgrounds long before the internet, or personal computing, was invented!!!! And tick-tock, to me, is the sound that the wind up clock on my parent's mantelpiece made 😀.
My ADHD Dx literally changed my life! I don't feel "normal" but I feel so much better about my life and able to handle things so much better! Part of it is meds (I'm on Strattera) and part of it is accepting myself and learning coping and management skills. Good luck to you! Some studies say that there's up to 80% comorbidity of autistic who also have ADHD. (And up to 50% of ADHDers who have autism). Oh - I got my ADHD Dx a few days shy of my 61st birthday, so I'm right up there with you at 62 with 63 lurking around the corner. I doubt I'll seek an official autism diagnosis. Not sure what it would do for me, but that's just me. Maybe if I had the extra money to do so, I would.
One of my very favorite comedians is Hannah Gadsby, who has an entire stand-up special on Netflix about her autism diagnosis. (Seriously, if you haven't seen her show Douglas yet, please watch it because it's amazing. Warning: some parts are NSFW.)
I knew something was wrong with me my entire life. And yet it was so hard for me to get a diagnosis of autism as a child because my mom would literally lie on the diagnosies sheets and say that I was lying. Now, at 24 with a "Yeah, you're autistic." confrimation; Take that, mom!
I'm 42. I spoke to my mum yesterday 15 mins after making the first call to book an appointment at a GP. She said "I'm so glad you are now doing something about it, I always knew". I don't think she realises how much that sentence broke me. So much hardship could have been avoided.
Thankfully Hannah Gadsby, Fern Brady and others are doing a great job of improving autism awareness in the standup comedy space. You don't have to punch down to be funny.
I LOVE Hannah Gadsby. I've watched her Douglas special at least five times and LOL so hard every time. My only regret is that I'll never be able to watch it for the first time again. I've not heard of Fern Brady but I just saw this quote of hers and now I love her too. 'She has also said, "an autistic brain [can] provide an escape route from the traditional paths laid out for women".' I'll have to check out her stuff.
OMG I saw a couple of Hannah Gadsby's specials years ago. Didn't realize she was autistic, but it makes a lot of sense now I think about it, lol. I'm gonna have to find her again. She's funny.
It’s such a classist take. It took me nine years to get my daughter diagnosed and so many trips to doctors. Nobody in my area can diagnose adults and if they could it would be thousands of dollars. I’m fine just knowing my daughter came by it naturally and relieved to know she won’t struggle with feeling broken Iike I did.
I only eventually paid for official assessment to knock the imposter syndrome on the head. Even now I need to remind myself it's the real me because I have mastered masking as a different human all my life...self diagnosis was the first step to freedom...
As someone not diagnosed until late 50s, I DID seek a diagnosis or explanation over the years. And as luck would have I received several (incorrectly) over the years. I was treated for eating disorders (turns out not feeling hunger or thirst can cause significant health issues) that i didnt have. There has been a myriad of mental and physical issues put down to other causes by professionals. And the ensuing treatments, which were always unsuccessful would cause me to retreat and hide and ignore fir another 5, 10 years. Even with an education and more importantly, insurance and resources I gave up time and time again because most days being alive was unexplainably difficult, and I didn't have it in me to keep trying to push that rock uphill.
Thank you for your evenhanded and well-reasoned, well-articulated response to this issue. It definitely doesn't seem like appropriate content for a stand-up comedian.
Took me 46 adult years to self diagnose and 14 professional psychiatrists did not spot it in all that time😂😂😂 If you search Autism Canada for adult resources, they send you to an Autistic RUclipsr in the UK.😂😂😂😂 🥰🥰🇨🇦
Maybe through the wars but I have survived whereas I know 27 personally that did not. Those wars helped me to gain skads of the very rare quality of "resiliance". Very grateful for this.❤️👍
You could've been talking about me... same 46yo when I self diagnosed where no "professional" (and I've seen many) had even thought about it. Professionals are only just now starting to realize how much they don't understand about autism. I've been trying to reach out to professionals for help and even then they go back to their backwards ABA treatment therapies and trying to make me addicted to every possible medication that does me more harm than good. Simple things like having a "safe room" or a support pet will forever remain out of my reach (even though the law in Europe says every ND person has a basic right to it). Those kind of professionals are the ones that NT people put their trust in... my trust in them is 100% gone.
I went to tons of psychiatrists in the USA from 1990 to 2022 and none of them spotted autism. They saw all of my problems as a female as mental health issues. I do have some mental health problems which helped hide the autism. But I finally got diagnosed with autism in March of 2023.
I recently saw a presentation from a professor in neuroscience about autism. It was very interesting and she was amazing, but one detail comes to mind now. She said if not for cooccurring conditions and masking, the diagnosis of autism would be so simple that the receptionist could probably do it. And if that is true, why would one not be able to know for themself? If I am honest, all the tests and information gathering I did served mainly to ease my doubts and unlearn the things I thought I knew about it, so I could get a clear view. Yes it is useful and good to dig deep and be certain, but there was a moment when I heard Paul Micallef talk about his experiences, that a shift of perception just happened and I knew "this is me". And to be even more honest, at first I searched for proof that it was not true, but there was really no getting away from it after that.
Wow, just wow! That video is so unkind! It is very offensive and why we are still pushing through ignorance and trying to educate and strive for acceptance. We blocked Tic Toc from our son's phone due to the type of stuff that is on there. This video just solidifies that I, as a parent, have made the right decision.
Oh gosh yes. Block TikTok absolutely. My son is/was older when TikTok released and all his classmates and friends at school had it. It’s so difficult to parent (and develop) kids these days with some of the worst influences a button press away.
I've seen many healthcare "professionals" over the years but never once had one even suggested I could be neuro diverse, yet they made me go through so many psychological tests. After wondering for over 40 years why I felt I wasn't like everybody else, and picking up more and more clues of what autism really is, I decided to do an online test. I ticked nearly all the boxes... so I did another test, and another, and another... all from reputable institutions and each and every one of them put me in the bracket of highly likely to be autistic. So I discussed it with my friends, my wife and all of them recognized and confirmed that I have all these traits. Fast forward a few years later, I talk to psychiatric nurses, psychiatrists etc and even asked them to be officially tested. Their response: "Why? You already know you're autistic, what are you trying to achieve with it?" Is that the kind of professionalism neurotypicals rely on?
I think when it comes to self-diagnosis it's just important to think about why you are doing it. I have seen some self-diagnosers who do it for the wrong reason or self-diagnose without researching properly. However aside from those people I think self-diagnosing is very helpful. It actually lead me to get a professional diagnosis. A diagnosis can be so difficult to get. I spent years just diagnosed with adhd and slowly over time I started getting misdiagnosed for a lot of things. I then switched psychiatrists, she said that in order to get diagnosed with autism I would have to switch my medication (bc it was contradicting each other) for other meds and then after doing everything and ruling out every possible diagnosis, only then would she diagnose me. I ended up going off all my meds (except for adhd) and going to a neurodivergent centre for my diagnosis, which involved my mum taking me along with her on a work trip (I literally had to fly across the country). It's been such an exhausting journey, I don't know why psychiatrists gate keep autism, and are more comfortable to diagnose someone with (example) bipolar than autism. Misdiagnosing is so problematic!
Wow! I can’t imagine dealing with that! I am so glad it’s getting better, my diagnosis went so well, and my heart breaks for others who had so much push back from complete and utter ignorance! Things will get better for the younger generations, thank goodness!!
@@terminaldeity but they would literally go with a diagnosis with no supporting evidence, like bi polar, I was diagnosed BP at 13 after talking to a doc for 5 minutes, never have showed any mania or cycling. I was actually autistic with ADHD, BP is an extremely common misdiagnosis for autistic woman and those AFAB.
@@terminaldeity It is gatekeeping when they make it so hard to get an autism diagnosis. Most mental problems can be diagnosed very easily. You just see a psychiatrist. One session and you have a diagnosis. Autism is a long waiting list, expensive or both. It takes a special appointment of 3+ hours for an autism assessment. Also, many mental health professionals discourage adults from getting an autism diagnosis. This happened to me and many other adults who later received a diagnosis of autism. Those are two ways of gatekeeping an autism diagnosis.
Self diagnosis is so very valid! I am diagnosed late in life at 37, the same time as my teenage daughter. I haven’t personally come across any videos of someone claiming to be autistic and get the feeling they are faking it, haven’t had any red flags pop up. Where are all of these creators faking autism? They all seem genuine to me, my pattern recognition is very keen, and I can spot a disingenuous person quite accurately. I’ve noticed a large correlation with women or those AFAB being accused at a much higher rate, as a woman who can mask decently, it makes me so angry!
Love this, Mike! Your take on this is spot on. Very insightful. I also cringe for any ND in this audience that were pretending to enjoy this for fear of standing out. Extremely tone deaf comic! He won't go far without some humility.
I’m pretty sure I’m on the spectrum. Never used tik tok, so idk what’s happening over there. I’m in my 30’s and have had many struggles in life. Did lots of research into my mental health, and life issues, not even thinking about Autism. A lot of things lines up, started asking my family things like “did I do anything weird as kid? Did I have any strange behaviors?” And such. They told me a buch of things that line up with undiagnosed ASD. A few things I’ve always had issues with were insomnia, stomach issues, and severe chronic migraines. No medical professional could ever find anything wrong with me. For decades. My only issue is, where I live the cost of an assessment is in the thousands, and most will only asses children. I’m not looking to be Autistic, I just want to know what the hell is up with me. If I am, I have my answer and I can stop worrying and just rock in with life finally understanding myself for the first time in my life. If I’m not, cool, but I’m going to keep searching. The professionals dont know, so I’m on my own doing research and have been for a long long time. At this point it seems like I’m the only one who can help me and will actually put work in. But so much lines up. I’ve talked to friends I know who are diagnosed, who would know better than people who actually are on the spectrum. After having heartfelt conversations with them, they all either said “I could have told you that! Why didn’t you ever ask?”, “heeeeey! You sound just like me!”, or “oh, wow, I thought you already knew that?” So, like what do I do with that? Lmao some told me I was definitely on the spectrum and getting the assessment would be a waste of time to hear something I should already know and has been obvious to everyone around me. So if people who are actually diagnosed are saying that and not even getting offended. I can function enough to work and live life almost normally, although it’s difficult. Man, I honestly just want to know, no matter what the outcome is. I just want the truth whatever it is. Like I went through all of my medical records, my history, family history, and a lot of my moms side of the family are on the spectrum, some need lots of support, others not so much, so hereditary for sure. Also, people say because I do have to obsessive hobbies, sensory issues, my social issues. It took me until I was almost 20 to understand sarcasm. I’m not gonna say everything, it’s too much, but a lot overlaps, but I wont say I am until I have answers. But yeah, I was more shocked that people were like “yeah, we know” instead of “how dare you?” So idk what to think or how to progress at this point.
Yeah, and what Dan doesn't mention is that professionals didn't bother to learn much about autism so there aren't many experts in it. Most people pass around the diagnosis responsibility. It's obviously not taught well to psychology majors. The horrific ABA still exists. That makes me lose any respect or trust for the psychology profession as a whole. And for politicians who have done nothing to protect autistic people (who are the most discriminated against in the workplace).
Thank you Mike and Sabre :) I've also got folders, but they're digital ... despite me being old enough to be retired :) And on that, my age limits the chance of getting support (on the grounds that I'm no longer working and thus "don't need anything"!), but I've also had many decades of masking to undo, and people like that pseudo "comedian" (perhaps, if he is the opposite of comedian, that "naidemoc") don't help me nor society in general, as society is better in every way when it is progressive and inclusive. On the other hand, you DO help, so, again, thank you Mike and Sabre :)
Something I think is important, is that recent statistics are saying 1 in 36 children are autistic, previously it was thought to be 1 in 2,500. Can you imagine how many people have been missed? How many people will never know they’re autistic? How many people who are only now finding out they’re autistic?
I would have chosen a work at home career for sure. Too late now. (or at least one with mostly neurodivergent people in it . . .Not a hospital full of sociopaths who stab each other in the back.
@Autistic_AF You were just checking to see if I was awake weren't you! I'm also getting back on to MC in a bit, my back is a bit better now, so fancy starting a new project, maybe the welcome centre 🤔 😆 or maybe an octopus 🐙 😀
@@BlueRoseHelen252I vote for the octopus 🐙. By the way. I jumped on as soon as I saw the notification, but there is just no possibility of beating you to it 😅
I paid $1,700 for an assessment or would have had to wait two years. The evaluation was negative, even though I have many traits and scored highly on a standardized test I found recommended online. I found out later that in the province where I got the assessment, I would have received a monthly stipend from the government for life if I had fallen below some income threshold, so I am still determining what I believe. I decided to skip knowing and think of my life without the pathology label while having solid suspicions. Thank you for this discussion. When I think of my earnest attempt to understand why I am specific ways, that comedian is offensive. It was anything but whimsical. Mind map. I love it.
My parents both have different types of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I was never allowed to set boundaries and if I ever dared to, I got physically and emotionally abused for even trying. Throughout my life, people just stepped over me and abused me in any way- employers, friends, partners, my siblings, even my children. I'm self-diagnosed for about three months and have healed tremendously from my cptsd in only two years, due to learning about the abuse, learning to recognise red flags and making huge changes in my life. Now I have only very few people in my life- no friends or acquaintances, but people I have to communicate with, on a daily basis. I'm just learning to set boundaries and I'm beginning to realise how much in my life I actuallly did and endured, that got me depressed and suicidal for 50 years.
Heck, us Boomers / Gen Jones never had opportunitues to get evaluated unles we veered way off of what was considered "normal" for children - like being very disruptive in class.
I went to the state mental hospital in 1990 at age 15. So my behavior was off. The problem is that back then usually only level 3 autism was recognized. Asperger's wasn't in the DSM until 1994. So because I had no language delays and was a female even after 1994 my autism wasn't recognized. I don't even mask a lot. All of my problems were viewed through a mental health lens. I have been diagnosed with 14 mental illnesses (not all at the same time) over a 30 year period. So back then even if your behavior was off you probably wouldn't have gotten an autism diagnosis. You more likely would have been diagnosed with mental problems. Especially if you were female. Or if you masked a lot as a male.
I'm about the same age as you... I can't do TikTok... just 0 interest. I don't get the draw of it. Social media wasn't a thing when I was in school... I consider myself a xennial. I think what bothered me more than his jokes was the laughter to them. So many people thought it was funny... so it wasn't just one guy. 😭 That laughter made me feel ill... I starting to think I might be autistic after a Mom on the Spectrum video popped into my RUclips feed and I decided to check it out. I went down a rabbit hole after that. [before youtube I thought I was "kind of ADHD" and "kind of OCD"... autism wasn't even an option because I didn't have learning difficulties and wasn't like Sheldon Cooper]. Meg was one of the ones I had a lot of "me too" or "not everyone does that?" moments watching... which was one reason why I joined her discord and there have been daily "ME TOO!"" moments there. My nurse practitioner said only kids can get free assessments and I'd have to pay thousands of dollars (I think she had to research it)... others told me there was a waiting lists of years... but I wasn't given that option and I don't have have thousands of dollars (I live alone and only work part-time). I think a diagnosis would help with my deep imposture syndrome... I don't think I mask well... I'm just super shy and don't talk much. I did well in school and just didn't try hard enough to make friends (according to family). There's nothing wrong with me, I just don't apply myself, I don't try hard enough, I need to put myself out there more...
Self diagnosis helped - me to understand why things turned out the way they did and why often in social situations I feel I don't fit in. It came as a shock initially but then came a feeling of relief. As for the comedian on Tik Tok - not worth listening to as it is just rubbish.
Self diagnosis is valid! I was diagnosed with ADHD in the early 80s, I spent the last year researching autism once I suspected (I work in biotech as a job and I know how to do academic research), talked to many people on the spectrum, done all the usual tests, and was told many things by my mother about the autistic-like things I did as a child. While I am not formerly diagnosed, I am now very sure I am an autistic person who was never picked up when younger because I learned how to mask to get by, even if it often didnt work with coworkers over many jobs. I am not even sure at 49 if its worth seeking a formal diagnosis, especially given the track record for medical professionals with autism misdiagnosis, huge waiting lists, not to mention the stigma, and other potential fallout including being turned down emigration to some countries, higher insurance, and potential job issues. It's enough to put many people off pursuing a formal diagnosis.
Kindness, understanding, decency, civility and respect are universal values that everyone deserves to receive. Ridicule by parody is not comedy. It's just a bigot behaving like a bigot. Do I quack like a duck? Ten years ago I visited a transgender people's support group and discovered I did, having struggled with my identity for thirty-five years after having been outed and called a pervert by my mother in my teens. For most of that time I'd considered myself an inexplicable freak of nature, but now I know about (most likely) diethylstilbestrol (DES) that was supposed to prevent my mother from having a miscarriage, and Robert Stoller's work on psychosocial development "The Transsexual Experiment" and realise that everything fits. The jigsaw was there and I was the lonely missing piece unable to make sense of my experiences. Accepting myself and coming out was like doing up a zip and becoming one whole person, not two. So many trans people (who are out) are autistic. It is being pathologised endlessly by bigots as a reason to resist acceptance and treatment of trans adolescents for whom having the one puberty appropriate for them would be enormously life-enhancing. Yet Occam's razor shows that autistic people are relentlessly authentic and less influenced by social stigma, so are likely to reflect the proportion of trans people in a hostile and unaccepting society as a whole, most of whom never find the courage to accept themselves, let alone come out. I didn't believe I was autistic, but I had figured out that I have CPTSD after decades of being misdiagnosed and treated for anxiety and depression. It was in a support group for CPTSD where a friend was discussing her late diagnosis of autism and ADHD and I had another "it sounds like me, do I quack like a duck?" moment. It grabbed my attention and made it impossible for me to continue to listen to her until I had my own answer and I realised that was autistic behaviour even whilst it was happening. Of course I did the self-assessments there and then, discovered that I'm autistic and ADHD AF too and rejoined the meeting. At an appropriate time (I managed to exercise self-restraint) I 'came out' to the CPTSD group and it was "Yes, it's been obvious to us since you joined, it didn't occur to us that you didn't know." A second enormous validation and tremendous relief. Accepting myself again has made so many things make sense, including a self-harming incident when I was under ten years old and the school teachers told my parents to get me assessed, which they took as an insult, not as a call to action. Sharing my self-discovery with my adult offspring has made my eldest and youngest aware of their autism a whole generation earlier than I have and is enabling them to be compassionate towards themselves and make accommodating life choices early in their adulthood. This brings me joy beyond measure. Self-diagnosis FTW!
Thank you for sharing your story 🧡 - it’s encouraging that the trend - if there is one, seems to be towards increased awareness, and self compassion. -Mike
Hi Mike! Hi Sabes! 👋 Mike, I love your mind map 💜 looks just like the sort of thing I draw for all sorts of reasons, but mine are the old fashioned pencil and paper sort. That "comedian " literally made me feel sick. I cannot fathom such a lack of empathy and understanding of another human being's intrinsic worth and value. How is it that such mocking distain is entertainment?! Or considered funny? It makes me appreciate the genuine welcome and warmth within the Autisticats community. 🐈🐱🐈⬛❤
Hey Pardalote! Sabes waves his paw 🐾! Haha mind maps are great, I find. I like electronic over paper since I can add extra data to the nodes and move them around. It’s almost meditative. The comedian’s comments were just nasty. 🤮
@Autistic_AF Oh Sabes, I feel honoured that you acknowledged me 🐈⬛ Mike, I would totally appreciate you posting a video (or talking through in a live) how to do these electronic mind maps. I am a bit out of touch with the possibilities of the digital world. Sometimes, technology makes me feel like I am "old and need new paint" like Annie and Clarabel. 😄
It's not a lifetime of feeling different for me, it's a lifetime of feeling defective when I try to live in neurotypical ways. By denying a person authority on their own lived experience and treating autism as a medical condition only, we only further the harm that people have already been subjected to
I self diagnosed when I understood what was different about me. The doctors didn't even see me and they said I was just depressed. 😂 Trust me I'm not depressed. As long as you know and understand yourself then you can find like minded people to be a community with.
I would like to share a story I feel is relevant to the conversation of self-diagnosis: A few years ago, I had to go to the ER for intense abdominal pain and nausea. The pain was so intense that I had to look up my own personal information on my phone to fill out a form. I couldn't even remember my middle name because the pain was so intense. Regardless of this, multiple nurses asked me one very important question: "What do you think might be the issue?" That's right, multiple medical school graduates asked me to provide my uneducated opinion on the cause of my visit. I said I wasn't sure and they encouraged me to guess. They WANTED me to self diagnose! And I'll admit right now, my first guess was wrong. I thought it was appendicitis. The nurse immediately asked to feel around on my stomach and began putting light pressure on the area surrounding my appendix and confirmed that my guess was incorrect. But now, they had a general idea of where the pain was (it wasn't exactly over the appendix, so i helped guide her hands to where the pain was most concentrated) & knew it would not be intensified by pressing down on it. They eventually came back to me and narrowed it down to two things. I forget what one of them was, but when they said "kidney stone," I immediately blurted out that kidney stones run in my family and that was most likely it. Again, they proceeded with testing based on MY assumptions. A good doctor knows that no amount of testing or education will allow them to feel what we feel in our own bodies. Our bodies and brains are designed to protect itself. Our self diagnoses and uneducated assumptions about our bodies can often get extremely close to reality despite our lack of medical degrees. I've heard so many stories of people being told by doctors they were fine or that tests for the condition they believed they had came back negative, but the patient was confident that something was wrong and kept demanding to be tested more by various different doctors before one finally told them they had been right all along. So this idea that we cannot know we are autistic because we aren't doctors is ludicrous. Good dctors value the words and opinions of their patients. I may not have access to the $200 textbooks they needed to graduate, but the internet is filled with free educational resources and no amount of schooling will allow doctors to know exactly what it has felt like to exist in this body my whole life.
That question is part of the diagnostic techniques. Here’s another one, “Why do you think you might have autism?”…. Your answers will indicate to primary care doctors what to offer you.
I was chilling with my friend, he likes listening to standup while cooking and stuff. And this guy came on. And it triggered me. I’ve NEVER been triggered by a comedian before. I’ve never really been triggered at all, but I told him “SHUT THIS OFF!” And had to go to another room and hang out with his dog for ten minutes to calm down. He played music for me to calm down, very thoughtful of him, but “Rainbow Connection “ was one of them. Now it’s a great song but it turned on the waterworks I tell ya. It REALLY made me feel like it was about autism at the moment.
While I disagree with your take on tiktok (I likely wouldn't have made my way here without some tiktok videos causing me to question my own behavior), I very much appreciate your advocacy for self-diagnosis and adult autism in general. There's a lot of throw-away content on tiktok. But there's also a lot of really great and useful material. Tiktok is unfairly (in my opinion) under fire and in danger of being banned here in the States. I think that would be a shame, not to mention the freedom of speech implications. Again, thanks very much for your work for our community, Mike. I appreciate you.
I don't care if they ban TikTok. China doesn't allow free speech. They are way worse at banning free speech than the USA. So why support China and TikTok if you are worried about free speech? If you can say the same thing on another platform then you can still speak freely. It is if you are banned from saying something across platforms that the government is censoring you. China uses TikTok to spy on the USA. That is a bigger issue with TikTok than free speech in my opinion.
As a high support needs person, the danger of self diagnosis is people never finding out that people like me exist. No one actually treats it like a disability anymore, making it harder to get people to understand how much help we need.
We Autistic people exist in all colors and shapes (metaphor) I think bringing awareness of the meaning of Spectrum and showing how diverse the autism community is, is a good thing. We need more support and we should fight together for getting it instead of excluding one to another. ❤ Jeannette
True. I don't like the movement claiming that it is not a disability and that we can do everything neurotypicals can, when that's simply not true. Disabled does not mean "bad" or "broken" like they seem to think it does... they're actually being more offensive denying autism being a disability than if they were to just accept everyone is different.
@@fungustheclown666 personally I believe in a mix model for disability. I recognize that there are things I can't do but that can be because of me or because of society... I find it a little disturbing when there is a positive toxic speech about autism but I also feel bad with the all negative speech (like the spot from Autism speaks)... But invalidating someone else's experiences because they are different from mine is a whole other book... For me more scarier than anything else is the inability to find middle ground in the ASD discussion.
I am a medium support needs person. I think everyone knows that high support needs autistic people exist. A few extremist low support needs people might try to deny it or say that we should be split up into autism and Asperger's groups again. But where do I fit then? My problem is with people who try to claim that autism is not a disability. For me and many other people autism is a disability. Because a few people don't need much or any support doesn't mean that we all don't need support. Autism is a disability. For most people who are diagnosed with it.
I'm sitting at about 1000 lines in Notepad++ for things I plan to print off for my formal assessment. That doesn't include the folders of report cards otes from teachers 😅
@@TheLexikitty if I had realized I was going to be taking so many notes, I would have used OneNote 😅 But for some reason I thought I would just have a page or so 🤦♂️ I'll have to look into Obsidian, though. It looks like it can sync across different devices which would be handy!
People self-diagnose allistism more often than not and no one seems to have an issue with it. I guess just because it’s a majority of people who are not thinking things thru of what self-diagnosis entails. It goes both ways.
How about we position diabetes, alcoholism, and autism in a group of things with some similar qualities: 1. There is a physical component - your body processes and reacts to the world in different/non-typical ways. 2. You can have a worst-case situation where you end up "sub-optimal", or you can recognize that you've got a problem and can do something to lessen or eliminate the worst effects, and 3. Self-diagnosis is what helps you respond to your condition in the way that gives you the best outcome, whether it's going to the doctor and getting medication (diabetes), or it's totally avoiding what sets things off (alcoholism), or finding ways to cope (everything from "better masking" and self-accommodation to supported accommodation). The first two conditions have become normalized, it's time to accept similarly the existence of autism. All 3 do best with acceptance and support from the people around you. Ridicule, ostracism, and denial all simply promote sub-optimal outcomes.
As a recently *self diagnosed* AuDHD adult of 58 - finding out about ASD was a revelation to me and it made perfect sense of my life and my quirks. As cringe-worthy as it sounds, I was led down this path of discovery after watching Love on the Spectrum and having some of my ignorant misconceptions about ASD overturned. A lot of reading and ASD Tuber videos later and I don't need an official diagnosis to validate this although of course, that would be nice. But the amount to time and hassle involved is just not worth it for me. I don't need support, as I've built my life around my needs and I don't need to prove anything to anyone, so I probably never will go through the official diagnosis process. And that's okay for me.
I saw "55 signs of autism" by Orion last Thursday, not searching for symptoms, it just was there on my YT-Page and curious as I am, I guess Google knew already... It made "DingDingDing" constantly. Yesterday I took the time and wrote every single one of those down (yeah, some are redundant), three I don't relate with and 30 I strongly relate with giving mutliple examples from my own life. By now I've made ALL Tests linked at Embrace Autism and the Monotropism one and not a single one is on the edge or "maybe" side. They're bullseye and why they shouldn't be, as Orion and 100 hours later into YT-Videos like these, it just explains everything that happend and happens in my life. I put that "I'm a weirdo, I'll never buy even a plant because that will die by my negativity into a box" and put all my energy into hiding what I couldn't explain, simulating a person that earns his money in order to make a living, that is somewhat socially accepted. And one week later there is: - I know why basically everything was and is the way it s in my life, I and others were wondering about - I finally noticed being 46 years, that I'm not alone! This is a handful! - Now I need to find a way to stop torturing myself without losing the ability to afford living - I need to accept myself finally and need to change where I live, how I live - An official diagnostic: Will take two years plus to even get an evaulation started. In the best case they tell me what I already know. Then I could apply for being a "disabled person" and stop working, which is incredibly hard in Germany and all the great benefits you get is that your aren't even allowed to be part workforce anymore and barely get the rent paid on "benefits" for the rest of your life. That entire process might take five years including ging to social courts. If you don't have clinical depression by then, chances are good you get it from eating pasta with ketchup every day ending up doing, what Autist peaple seem to do with that Outlook... (Do you notice, that basically like 90% of the struggles are economically induced? I would never found out or even cared if I was financially independent in a way that would never has required masking in the first place, wearing me down)
for me a late autism diagnosis took 3 years and only 8 years after was to be tested for adhd too self diagnosis can be the way of describing the expected outcome for some on something that could take half their life to get.
I've had a hard time fitting in my whole life but grew up at a time when mental healthcare was pretty much only for people whose illness makes them a danger to society. For everyone around me I was just weird so I missed the window when autism is most easily identified. Nobody ever considered the possibility of me being autistic (me included) until a couple of years ago when I had a complete meltdown at work (a different decade, a different country). I've been seeking a formal diagnosis since then. Even if it is not autism, it will help me understand myself better and navigate the situation in a way that doesn't lead to constant distress and subsequent burnout. The thing is it is extremely difficult to get a formal diagnosis. You either sit on a waitlist for a very long time, get an assessment from someone with limited experience whose final conclusion is "inconclusive" because there isn't sufficient data from your childhood or pay a large sum out of pocket to do it privately. I already got the "inconclusive" result and went through a 7-month waitlist for a specialized facility only to be told at the intake appointment that they have staff shortage and I should go find another place. I am on another waitlist now but at this point I'm not getting my hopes up I will ever get an answer, no matter how relatable the autistic experience sounds. So I understand people who try to self diagnose. If the system fails you, you can't do much else. Personally, I wouldn't label myself because I'm very sensitive to rejection and I don't want a potential different diagnosis to once again make me feel like I don't know where I belong. I do however fully understand people who do it to find peace within themselves.
i’ve noticed that it tends to be allistics who like to white knight for autistics and claim that self-diagnosis takes away from “real autistic people.” autistics ourselves, on the other hand, tend to be much more accepting and understanding regarding self-diagnosis and autism.
Even with an official autism diagnosis you don't get much official help. If you self diagnose you will probably get no official help. So how does it harm someone?
13:32, I feel like the mind map was all the proof you needed, my man. I’m at that point in my journey and I just had to look back on an email I sent to my VP at work and I feel like I should bring that to my doctor for my assessment. It was an email that could have been “am I correct in thinking that we do x because it would prevent y” but it was a four paragraph infodump deepdrive manifesto as to how doing x would prevent y then ending with “am I thinking about this in the correct manner”. Like… how was I not catching this shit before.
I think the main risks are that it can look like other things, like cptsd, and self diagnosis can prevent you from getting the care you need if that is the case. But I was self diagnosed before I was diagnosed, and then once diagnosed... There werent really resources, because I am already technically a successful adult. I could have saved myself that bill and all the time waiting if I just had faith in my own assessment. Because there aren't really many useful interventions once you are grown, are good at masking, are successfully employed. So what do you even do with that paper. I would actually encourage many people to self diagnose, tbh. The end result is the same.
One of the interesting parts of being self-diagnosed late in life is knowing there may have been a time where I laughed with that crowd... Now I'm viscerally hurt by his words. Growth is a funny thing, especially when it's facilitated by Tiktok (i love being part of the audhd community there)
What is wrong with these people (the so-called comedian) who make fun of people who say they are autistic. If there were not self-diagnosed people to laugh at and bully, they would be doing the same to newly diagnosed adults. What's it to them? Also, I have never met a neurotypical who actually understands what autism is/feels like or who would want to be autistic. On the other hand, I have never met an autistic person who said they do not want to be autistic, regardless of the difficulties, because autistic is who they are. I will never understand why so many people make such a fuss about autistic people, self-diagnosed or otherwise. There are videos of mothers of autistic children who resent the idea that not all autistic people are like their autistic child and believe there should be a different name for them.... I mean, really, come on! what is wrong with people???!!! In my world (yes, it's very small), if someone tells me they are autistic or deaf or anxious or happy or depressed or Swedish or reincarnated, I am not going to call them a liar and ask them to prove it. It is none of my business. In the case of anxious or depressed, I would probably ask if there's anything I can do, but all the others don't affect me or anyone other than them. I get the impression that social media (tiktok, facebook, et al) have given people the impression that they have a say in what other people believe or are. Before social media, I think it would have been unthinkable to put an article in a newspaper, the equivalent of social media of the past, claiming that people are 'faking' autism or 'jumping on the autism bandwagon' without having seen a doctor. The reaction to such an article would probably have been a complete lack of interest, a healthy 'who cares?' reaction.
I've made a bunch of other comments on relevant topics but I also wanted to say that your beautiful void kitty Sabre looks just like my beautiful void kitty Jasper, and I was tickled beyond belief that you also have a Jasper kitty! (Who looks just like my old kitty Legolas.) 🖤
@@Autistic_AF he was the sweetest boy ever, I miss him. Jasper is also very sweet but very shy so I am the only person (lucky me!) who gets to witness his sweetness.
I left a high demand/control group/religion before I ever thought I may be autistic. I find it more than a little interesting, that the resistance (and the way this resistance was expressed by) family, friends, and other members of the group, towards those who leave, is not dissimilar to the resistance shown towards those who self diagnose as autistic. “You don’t really know” “you’re just awkward” “you’re doing it wrong” “you’re just being trendy” “you don’t want to conform” “you’re just lazy”
Hi Tam, me too. I was in a highly controlling religion throughout my teenage years and left in my mid twenties. I can see similarities too. I think you might be right. -Mike 🧡
I really appreciate your channel. I feel like I have a community here. I began with a question; could I be autistic? Research and time with other adult autistics lead to a self diagnosis. Of course, me being a good little psychologist, I couldn’t accept only a self diagnosis, so for my own peace of mind, I sought a formal, medical, diagnosis. Well, big shock, turns out that I’m quite the clever autistic guy and had been well masking it for decades. But, autistic nonetheless. My point is however, it all began with the question. Any way. Thanks for another video. I appreciate you.
i m a self-diagnosed audhdier i never go to any kind of therapy before ı become 15 (bc my parents doesn't really believes its sth needed and thought i m fine even tho i m f*cking not), i never need any speech therapy, i talked very early even (i was able to say words while 9-10 months old and when i m 16-18 months old i was able to talk in sentences, answer questions and walk freely without any help) but i have extreme sensory issues just a sec ago i cried while trying to wash a dirty glass bc it felt soo bad, i was trying my best but couldn't help it... in the end i put some gloves (the gloves weren't for washing dishes so they make me feel weird when its wet) on and washed it like that which was not the best maybe but it was more bearable than before. its only one of my struggles in my daily life and just bc i didn't get a speech therapy or didn't get a official diagnosis you can't say i m lying, my struggles are real and i m struggling with those for a long time now, i can't even mask it properly for gods sake! my self-diagnosis is valid and if you don't accept it you can jump of a cliff or whatever just leave me alone, i already had it enough
It seems to me that the definition of autism has expanded greatly in recent years. When I was younger, a person who was autistic was nonverbal or inappropriately verbal, completely wrapped up in his own world, oblivious to other people and unable to form or uninterested in relationships with humans. They were often VERY interested in THINGS, like machines, electronics, THE PHYSICAL WORLD, but anything SOCIAL was scary to them. Now, autism covers many who are only slightly different, or have the trait you talked about - monotropism- and usually have social anxiety and awkwardness. This is why there are so many more who now fall onto the autism spectrum.
I live near a fairly large metro area and I still cant find someone who evaluates ADULTS I’ve emailed over 7 so far. All the same response. I started copying and pasting my long scripted message explaining why I would like an eval lol
When you go to many professionals and they take 15 minutes to diagnose you as depressed or anxious... don't care when you say the medication doesn't work, because they know better... when your psychologist laughts at you because you say you relate to X or Y.... it's just normal you will self diagnose. This week my test results came out... The psychologist pretty much said since I have a IQ above average I do not have ADHD or ASD.
That’s horrible, Dani 😞 the psychologist needs retraining. The DSM-5 and ICD-11 both provide for ASD with or without learning difficulties/intellectual disability.
I'm self-diagnosed due to me getting confused in any form of social interaction, added to my anxiety, & over-thinking trying to both answer the question that's being asked & second guessing the follow-up & tailoring my answer to make the answer to the second question easier; Not to mention my speech apraxia. I've seen about 7 medical professionals, only 1 of them guessed I might have autism, but I was far too confused to be to understand what she was saying.
There’s a lot to say about this topic (once I calm down from the intense anger caused by that comedian’s video) but I wanted to say… I’m reading (well listening) to Untypical as well! Great book
Omw I never knew about the books and binders that it's not just a me thing l😂l i love that I struggled to find a specialist but my journey started with documenting everything I could from childhood to recent day to show the specialist and to be prepared. It makes me happy to know I am not alone. This was a great video ❤ well made
For me that 'comedian' is just proudly expressing his ignorance about the topic, but spreading that amount of hate and misinformation is VERY dangerous, he's putting hurdles in the minds of their viewers so next exposure they have to autism will be worse in terms of acceptance and information seeking... So sad that people who are clearly rude and ignorant about a topic can have such an influence on people's minds because they know how to use humour with that crowd... Fuck trust! Long live verification.
Little final comment: He studied politics? Now it makes sense that he can convince a crowd with highly biased and uninformed claims as we see in that 'standup comedy' performance.
I'm self diagnosed and I am so bloody sure, my whole life and daily struggle is, after deleting all of the other things I struggle with, more than obvious. Tic toc for me, a 52 year old woman, is hell on earth. I end up there every now and then and I am totally gutted after jidt a few mins watching stuff. People are spreading dangerous stuff, people are incredibly unintelligent and they all present so horribly loud, arrogant and partially behave so evil, it triggers me horribly
For the love of God, when you can't get help from the medical community, WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO????? god I got sent to a neuropsych by my neurologist who had hoped I could get assessed for add/adhd but the place she sent me DOESN'T EVEN ASSESS FOR ANYTHING we discussed - so they assessed me for alzheimers - I DON'T HAVE ALZHEIMERS! Sweet Baby Jesus.......
I'm self diagnosed after recently finding out at 45yo that I am also Intersex, 47XXY. After going on testosterone replacement, my Autistic traits started getting worse as the testosterone gave me more confidence and put me in more social situations. This led to a self diagnosis of Autism less than a year later. I can identify with both male and female Autistic traits. With both male and female characteristics I believe that my chances of being diagnosed professionally are very limited as I genetically don't fall into the male or female category. I will fully embrace my self diagnosis until such time as advancements in diagnosing Autism become available, such as my Intersex diagnosis which is done via a Karyotype genetic analysis of my chromosomes. I was diagnosed with ADHD and bi-polar tendancies 20 years ago. This should have been Autism and Autistic Burnout as far as I am concerned, and was a common misdiagnosis back in the day because it exhibits many similar traits.
You are diagnosed using "male" traits of autism! Everyone is. The research they did for autism assessments was almost all done on males. So I wouldn't let that aspect stop you from getting diagnosed.
There are so many reason it's difficult to get officially diagnosed as an adult. Here if you can't fork over 3-5 grand for a private assessment forget about it... And that still doesn't guarantee that those doing the assessment will be experienced enough to know how to spot autism in adults. I've heard of people going through multiple assessments before getting a diagnosis. Like, I'm a single person with a mortgage. That isn't feasible for me. The whole Tik Tok thing is annoying in the sense that it gives people an excuse to invalidate others. I don't think MOST self diagnosed autistic people are doing so off of a few videos they saw online... Some people may be self diagnosing because they think it makes them "quirky" but most of us know it's not like that at all. I first suspected I was on the spectrum almost 20 years ago and the more information I've gathered (which is a ton, being how I am...) the more sense it makes. I'm still finding out stuff (as more and more is known about autism, particularly in women) that is like light bulb after light bulb. Heck psychologists apparently suspected I had "high functioning autism" when I was 6 but for whatever reason I wasn't given the proper testing. I think I just wasn't deemed as "autistic enough" or my parents didn't push for further testing. I think I probably would have been given a PDD-NOS diagnosis back then if I had been specifically assessed for autism. Later in life as I learned to mask and then tried to get tested as an adult I was told (after a quick appointment with a psychiatrist who clearly knew little about autism), "Oh you can make eye contact and hold a conversation. Plus you have friends. You can't be autistic..." Then I went back, that time bringing in psychological assessments I had done in childhood, and he changed his tune a bit, saying it was possible, but he more so thought I just had social anxiety (I don't. I've researched and compared it to ASD. ASD makes WAY more sense). Nothing ever happened after that. So here I am. Armed with literally YEARS of information and nothing I can do with it. I honestly never flat out say "I'm autistic" but I still hardly tell anyone that I suspect I am because of the backlash that usually receives.
Hi Saber 👋🏽 my favourite part are the endings 🐈 I love cats 💜 that “comedian” is evil and would happily remove anyone who isn’t a bully like him from society and this is why so many NT’s don’t stand up for anything because they don’t want to be targeted by bullies like him! But it’s okay for us to be his punching bag! His words made me cry because as a 38 y/o black woman, life is hard and society is so unkind to me. The struggle to even be accepted to be put forward for assessment has been a battle in itself and I have to wait 2 years to get fully assessed. I’m thinking to go private, but that in itself is hard for me to navigate…anyway he is an idiot and so are his audience for laughing so hard! Cowards!
Hello! 🐈⬛ Awwww I’m so glad you’re enjoying the end of the videos 🧡 - I’ll make a video just about the cats at some point! Your struggles are shared by so many. You’re not alone. Take care -Mike
My own comments will overlap a bit with the video, but hopefully expand on and supplement them well: We can be critical of something without invalidating it. Self-diagnosis has a lot of risks, both to the individual and communities at large. But so does a great deal of professional diagnosis with so many barriers to competent assessment. Autism is one of the most rapidly advancing areas of mental health disorder research, and many mental health professionals are decades behind on the accepted state of autism research and related diagnostic features. Self-diagnosis runs risk of failures in differential diagnosis, or multiple diagnosis. Someone who has some but not all features of autism may in fact have another disorder, which would have very different methods for treatment and different standards of outcome. Someone who is autistic but who also has other disorders at play is more likely to both miss those other diagnoses and the distress they can be causing, and may try to apply autism management skills unsuccessfully to the others. And in both cases the not-fully-informed voice of these people may muddy the waters and add more confusion and possible (unintentional) distress or harm to others. Those risks aren’t all that different from the risks associated with misdiagnosis from professionals either. So we can be informed about and critical of the weaknesses apparent in both self-diagnosis and formal diagnosis, and also see the validity in both. In regards to self-diagnosis, generally no one else will have better knowledge of your own symptoms and experiences than you do. In regards to professional diagnosis, generally no one would have better knowledge of the disorders, their features, and the means to successfully manage them, than mental health professionals. Both have value, ideally they should be working together. I think universally two things are beneficial: 1. Improving our understanding of autism both at the professional and general population levels. 2. Improving access to competent and up-to-date assessment and treatment.
There's one particular guy on RUclips who basically believes that you can't be autistic if you don't have his symptoms. However, as a self-diagnosed autistic, I do believe it's possible to be self-diagnosed, though it does take considerable insight.
Realistically, self identifying as autistic is just step 1 for adults in their diagnostic journey. We didn't get caught in childhood for whatever reason, and for me at least, was trying to figure out what the heck was going on in my brain that was making life so difficult. Figuring that out & self identifying took *months* of research, listening to productions from autistic people & doctors & researchers & institutions & taking the science based tests & connecting the dots in my life. I wrote papers on how my life experiences fit the diagnostic criteria. All of that let me self identify as probably autistic (and eventually adhd too).
Then, *after* I self identified, I had to figure out if pursuing a formal diagnosis was right for me & being an American with no health insurance if I could even afford it. I decided it was important.
Total cost for my diagnosis in Texas ended up over $1500 and I was given help from family paying, massive discounts from the medical provider, and I'm on a payment plan to finish covering cost. Being able to do that was *still* a privilege.
Oh, and even though I'm in a major city, choices for where to go get diagnosed where not great. I found 1 in town that claimed to have the knowledge on diagnosing adults.
Anyway, my point with this was that pretty much all of us who actually went and got diagnosed later in life started by self identifying. You aren't going to go through the frustration or cost of getting a diagnosis without thinking you might be autistic 1st.
Well said, Rose. Hopefully this situation changes for future generations.
I'm happy that I wasn't diagnosed in my childhood or even after... would have been no good for me. There was, and there is still such a poor aknowledgment and huge misunderstanding. I will not search for a diagnosis either. It's just so fine to get to know about this just a few months ago, unexpectedlly, now that I'm 51.I just want to know how to live a better life at this precious moment when everything becomes clear and full of sense. Thanks to every voice, and thanks for every story, cause I find myself a bit in them.
I mean, isn't self-diagnosis the first step to being diagnosed with a lot of things? "My ankle hurts from when I landed on it funny yesterday, I think it's sprained." "I get this horrible headaches that make me vomit and are only on one side of my head, I think they're migraines." Why should autism be any different? I self-diagnosed as ADHD for over a year before I got a diagnosis and now I think I'm actually AuDHD but not sure I'll bother to be diagnosed since I'm already ND. And also for all the reasons Rose and AutisticAF mentioned, because it's expensive and a pain to try to find a good clinician who knows much about autism.
Anyway, I love this video, it's really excellent. What a giant jack-hole that so-called "comedian" is, and not funny at all. You're absolutely right, AutisticAF, that "Comedy is at its best when it punches up and not down." I've added this to my list of good quotes that I find all over the internet.
And that "OG autistic" clip...hilarious!
@ewestner - excellent point on self diagnosis in general.
Rose, I happy you finally got your official Dx! I have a friend my age (I'm 62) who would like to get evaluated and your experience helps to put that in perspective. I'm also low income, but I'm not sure I will ever seek a diagnosis. Maybe due to my ADHD Dx 2 years ago? I think for me, that's enough validation of my neuro-spiciness. I am certain I am autistic as well, but not sure what an official Dx would get me other than the paper to shut up people who say "you can't be autistic."
My ADHD meds and Dx (and consequently feeling different/ better about myself) as well as learning tools to cope and manage have gone a long way to ease my Major Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety, and autism fills the spaces/conflicts that don't align with ADHD.
Indeed😅
What we all forget is most diagnosis start with a self diagnosis. Like, Hey Doc, I think I sprained my ankle. I think my kid is sick. I think I'm pregnant, I think I have a rash... What, are we not supposed to NOT THINK? NOT INVESTIGATE? NOT be CURIOUS? This is all so ridiculous. And with the barriers to getting a diagnosis for Autism, of course most of us stay at Self Diagnosed, Self Idendifying.
It's the people who choose to make fun of the normal part of society, normal part of being human, that are the problem of society. And the fact that he put himself on a platform to be laughed at and then mad fun of people just makes it worse. Comedy should punch up, not down. And he masks it behind laughing at TikTok. What a Bully.
Haha, I just used the sprained ankle example in a comment too! Because I agree completely. And hey, you wouldn't go to the doctor for a suspected sprained ankle if your ankles weren't bothering you, right? "Hey, doc, I'm not in pain or limping or anything but would you check on my ankles to make sure they're working correctly?" "Hey doc, my throat doesn't hurt at all but maybe do a strep test?"
Would you bother jumping through all the hoops to get an autism diagnosis if you didn't think you might be autistic? Um....no.
When i went to the ER with a kidney stone and the nurses asked me what was wrong, I just listed off symptoms. They doubled down, asked me to GUESS what I THINK I have! I told them I was in so much pain that I couldn't think straight. They insisted, saying the worst case scenario was that I guessed wrong and that my guess would take them one step closer to the correct solution.
I actively tried to avoid self diagnosing and medical staff BEGGED for me to throw a wild guess out into the air. And they were right. Thanks to my initial wrong guess, they were able to determine that the source of my pain was located around my kidneys and was not caused by any sort of internal rupture.
You're supposed to go to the doctor every month or so and sit quietly while they figure it out on their own without your unqualified input on your own life experience
Critics: it's not valid without a medical professional's confirmation
Medical professional: you're not autistic, you've got a boyfriend
XD
In my ADHD eval when I said I wanted to pursue an autism eval as well, she said "you can't be autistic, you look people in the eyes." (Actually, I don't- I look at their mouths.)
@@EsmereldaPea me too! Omg
The power of lobbying
My best friend was denied diagnosis for having too many friends
All his friends are neurodiverse!! He struggles to make friends with neurotypicals. He even told the doctor this & they said it was irrelevant bc autistic ppl are basically hated by every person they meet.
@@LilChuunosuke yikes!
I self-diagnosed as gay. I consider it perfectly valid. I treat my autism the same way. Both being gay and autistic explain so much and have made me a lot happier about myself. The autism identification has been useful for relatives to understand me, I have been told. I’m 64. I realised I was autistic only 2 years ago. What point is there in a formal diagnosis?
Hi Steve, yes apt comparison and very perfectly valid.
Self-diagnosed as gay. I like that one. And how can we possibly argue with that?
Strange thought that being gay once was seen as a disability and even was included in a very early version of the DSM. I'm glad that is no longer so.
I bet someone has validated your self diagnosis of gay 😂 That is a perfect response ❤
Self diagnosed as Gay😂😂😂🤣❤️👍
@@reneedevry4361 I have had occasional help! My husband, for example.
If self diagnosis is a trend, it's a trend that has lasted multiple decades now.
I WISH autism was trendy back in the 90s….
@@Matty272 Would've made life a lot easier, huh?
also if autism were a trend,, there wouldn't be idiots like this so-called 'comedian' going around spewing the r word for some cheap jokes
I have pretty severe ADHD (tested at 5, parents refused treatment, finally got treatment at 21) but at that time you couldn’t get a dual diagnosis so I just beat myself up thinking I was weird or stupid. Dipped in and out of the research for several years before being okay wish self-diagnosis because I didn’t want to be That Person or whatever. Re-evaluating everything from an autistic perspective has helped so much of my brain work better, I didn’t even know emotional regulation was a possible thing, simple changes for sensory things have made a world of difference and I can see where my thought processes differ with others and compute between the two much more gracefully. I am in a more rural area now and can’t drive (legally blind) so a formal diagnosis would be fairly difficult, expensive, and not really change much for me. I’m far more interested in learning the adaptive strategies for myself and for interacting with others so I can make cool stuff and enjoy my life. Sorry for the rant, lol, just still convincing myself that’s okay I guess. 😅
Hey Lexi - honestly that’s so relatable! Simply knowing about sensory and emotional regulation and how it’s possible and techniques to assist us is empowering. -Mike
I see a lot of myself in this comment, with the most notable difference being that I don't have any issues that keep me from driving so I'm more mobile to come and go from my rural home.
I'm glad you're finding peace and self-understanding, and are pursuing things that are so meaningful to yourself.
These things are making all the difference for me, too.
I had a "mid life crisis" at 50, and my GP couldn't be bothered to make any effort to find out the cause. 5 years later I did the Aspi Quiz after hearing a trailer for a radio programme on autism, and took it to another GP who just gave me a blank look. It took another 8 years, and two attempts, to get my diagnosis (at 63). I didn't want to accept I was autistic without a diagnosis, so up to that point another 13 years of my life had been wasted, and more harm done. 3 years later I was starting to realise that autism didn't explain everything about my life, and self-diagnosed myself with ADHD. I've been on the NHS waiting list for that for a year, with another 3 years to wait, so tomorrow I have a private assessment that I've only had to wait 5 weeks for. Anyone who tries to tell me that self-diagnosis is invalid is likely to learn some new, and pretty obscene, language, that I started to learn in school playgrounds long before the internet, or personal computing, was invented!!!! And tick-tock, to me, is the sound that the wind up clock on my parent's mantelpiece made 😀.
My ADHD Dx literally changed my life! I don't feel "normal" but I feel so much better about my life and able to handle things so much better! Part of it is meds (I'm on Strattera) and part of it is accepting myself and learning coping and management skills. Good luck to you! Some studies say that there's up to 80% comorbidity of autistic who also have ADHD. (And up to 50% of ADHDers who have autism).
Oh - I got my ADHD Dx a few days shy of my 61st birthday, so I'm right up there with you at 62 with 63 lurking around the corner.
I doubt I'll seek an official autism diagnosis. Not sure what it would do for me, but that's just me. Maybe if I had the extra money to do so, I would.
how much was it to go private? i’ve been on the waiting list almost 4 years! (they told me it would be a year but we know what it’s like :/)
Rock on
The funny thing is that better comedians then him have bits about discovering they are autistic at 35+
Yes, very good point!
One of my very favorite comedians is Hannah Gadsby, who has an entire stand-up special on Netflix about her autism diagnosis. (Seriously, if you haven't seen her show Douglas yet, please watch it because it's amazing. Warning: some parts are NSFW.)
@@ewestner Oh God she is the worst comedian of all time. She is just hateful not funny. I was thinking Jim Jefferies
@@ExistenceUniversity hmmm, ok, I totally disagree but that's ok. :)
@@ExistenceUniversity - I absolutely LOVE her. I don't find her hateful at all. But to each their own.
I don't believe his self diagnosis as a comedian
😂😂 best.
I knew something was wrong with me my entire life.
And yet it was so hard for me to get a diagnosis of autism as a child because my mom would literally lie on the diagnosies sheets and say that I was lying.
Now, at 24 with a "Yeah, you're autistic." confrimation; Take that, mom!
I’m sorry you’ve had that experience 😳. Congrats on the diagnosis.
I'm 42. I spoke to my mum yesterday 15 mins after making the first call to book an appointment at a GP. She said "I'm so glad you are now doing something about it, I always knew". I don't think she realises how much that sentence broke me. So much hardship could have been avoided.
Thankfully Hannah Gadsby, Fern Brady and others are doing a great job of improving autism awareness in the standup comedy space. You don't have to punch down to be funny.
I LOVE Hannah Gadsby. I've watched her Douglas special at least five times and LOL so hard every time. My only regret is that I'll never be able to watch it for the first time again.
I've not heard of Fern Brady but I just saw this quote of hers and now I love her too. 'She has also said, "an autistic brain [can] provide an escape route from the traditional paths laid out for women".' I'll have to check out her stuff.
OMG I saw a couple of Hannah Gadsby's specials years ago. Didn't realize she was autistic, but it makes a lot of sense now I think about it, lol. I'm gonna have to find her again. She's funny.
I love them so.
It’s such a classist take. It took me nine years to get my daughter diagnosed and so many trips to doctors. Nobody in my area can diagnose adults and if they could it would be thousands of dollars. I’m fine just knowing my daughter came by it naturally and relieved to know she won’t struggle with feeling broken Iike I did.
I only eventually paid for official assessment to knock the imposter syndrome on the head. Even now I need to remind myself it's the real me because I have mastered masking as a different human all my life...self diagnosis was the first step to freedom...
I understand completely.
It's either TikTok that gave me autism, or society is to blame.
I mean: as long as it's not me I'm satisfied. 😁😂
Autism is definitely the fault of TiKTok. ADD/ADHD is society’s fault. 😜
Hopefully this one stays up longer than the last one!!
Let’s hope so! 🤞 😂😂
You didn’t mention aroma- or chrystal therapy so you should be in the clear 😆
@@JanneGlass😅
@@JanneGlass Something tells me it’s not the Lavender Mafia that was behind the last video!
As someone not diagnosed until late 50s, I DID seek a diagnosis or explanation over the years. And as luck would have I received several (incorrectly) over the years. I was treated for eating disorders (turns out not feeling hunger or thirst can cause significant health issues) that i didnt have. There has been a myriad of mental and physical issues put down to other causes by professionals. And the ensuing treatments, which were always unsuccessful would cause me to retreat and hide and ignore fir another 5, 10 years. Even with an education and more importantly, insurance and resources I gave up time and time again because most days being alive was unexplainably difficult, and I didn't have it in me to keep trying to push that rock uphill.
Totally relate
Thank you for your evenhanded and well-reasoned, well-articulated response to this issue. It definitely doesn't seem like appropriate content for a stand-up comedian.
Thank you ☺️
Took me 46 adult years to self diagnose and 14 professional psychiatrists did not spot it in all that time😂😂😂
If you search Autism Canada for adult resources, they send you to an Autistic RUclipsr in the UK.😂😂😂😂
🥰🥰🇨🇦
You’ve been through the wars on that front, Renee!
I didn’t know about Autism CANADA 🇨🇦 doing that 😂😂. I hope the resources are good!
Maybe through the wars but I have survived whereas I know 27 personally that did not. Those wars helped me to gain skads of the very rare quality of "resiliance".
Very grateful for this.❤️👍
@@reneedevry4361😢🧡
You could've been talking about me... same 46yo when I self diagnosed where no "professional" (and I've seen many) had even thought about it. Professionals are only just now starting to realize how much they don't understand about autism. I've been trying to reach out to professionals for help and even then they go back to their backwards ABA treatment therapies and trying to make me addicted to every possible medication that does me more harm than good. Simple things like having a "safe room" or a support pet will forever remain out of my reach (even though the law in Europe says every ND person has a basic right to it).
Those kind of professionals are the ones that NT people put their trust in... my trust in them is 100% gone.
I went to tons of psychiatrists in the USA from 1990 to 2022 and none of them spotted autism. They saw all of my problems as a female as mental health issues. I do have some mental health problems which helped hide the autism. But I finally got diagnosed with autism in March of 2023.
man do i hate “comedians” who have to ostracize and bully groups of people to make a crowd laugh. so gross.
The only thing this self-diagnosed ‘comedian’ proves is he doesn’t understand generational gaps and that he’s clearly getting old
Haha, that word choice though. 😂 Having a filter is overrated, no? 🤭
@@Leto85 who needs filters? 😘
@@JanneGlass You even put a 😘 at the end? Lucky me. 😳
Self diagnosed comedian... perfect.
@@JanneGlass People in hazardous environments with toxic gasses
I recently saw a presentation from a professor in neuroscience about autism. It was very interesting and she was amazing, but one detail comes to mind now. She said if not for cooccurring conditions and masking, the diagnosis of autism would be so simple that the receptionist could probably do it. And if that is true, why would one not be able to know for themself? If I am honest, all the tests and information gathering I did served mainly to ease my doubts and unlearn the things I thought I knew about it, so I could get a clear view. Yes it is useful and good to dig deep and be certain, but there was a moment when I heard Paul Micallef talk about his experiences, that a shift of perception just happened and I knew "this is me". And to be even more honest, at first I searched for proof that it was not true, but there was really no getting away from it after that.
Linkk
@@evelynn1173 It was this one: ruclips.net/video/YnU01HBN6zg/видео.html
Wow, just wow! That video is so unkind! It is very offensive and why we are still pushing through ignorance and trying to educate and strive for acceptance. We blocked Tic Toc from our son's phone due to the type of stuff that is on there. This video just solidifies that I, as a parent, have made the right decision.
Oh gosh yes. Block TikTok absolutely. My son is/was older when TikTok released and all his classmates and friends at school had it. It’s so difficult to parent (and develop) kids these days with some of the worst influences a button press away.
Indeed🎉
I've seen many healthcare "professionals" over the years but never once had one even suggested I could be neuro diverse, yet they made me go through so many psychological tests. After wondering for over 40 years why I felt I wasn't like everybody else, and picking up more and more clues of what autism really is, I decided to do an online test. I ticked nearly all the boxes... so I did another test, and another, and another... all from reputable institutions and each and every one of them put me in the bracket of highly likely to be autistic.
So I discussed it with my friends, my wife and all of them recognized and confirmed that I have all these traits.
Fast forward a few years later, I talk to psychiatric nurses, psychiatrists etc and even asked them to be officially tested. Their response: "Why? You already know you're autistic, what are you trying to achieve with it?"
Is that the kind of professionalism neurotypicals rely on?
I think when it comes to self-diagnosis it's just important to think about why you are doing it. I have seen some self-diagnosers who do it for the wrong reason or self-diagnose without researching properly. However aside from those people I think self-diagnosing is very helpful. It actually lead me to get a professional diagnosis.
A diagnosis can be so difficult to get. I spent years just diagnosed with adhd and slowly over time I started getting misdiagnosed for a lot of things. I then switched psychiatrists, she said that in order to get diagnosed with autism I would have to switch my medication (bc it was contradicting each other) for other meds and then after doing everything and ruling out every possible diagnosis, only then would she diagnose me. I ended up going off all my meds (except for adhd) and going to a neurodivergent centre for my diagnosis, which involved my mum taking me along with her on a work trip (I literally had to fly across the country). It's been such an exhausting journey, I don't know why psychiatrists gate keep autism, and are more comfortable to diagnose someone with (example) bipolar than autism.
Misdiagnosing is so problematic!
Wow! I can’t imagine dealing with that! I am so glad it’s getting better, my diagnosis went so well, and my heart breaks for others who had so much push back from complete and utter ignorance! Things will get better for the younger generations, thank goodness!!
It's not gatekeeping to rule out other causes of symptoms. That's the entire basis of medicine.
@@terminaldeity but they would literally go with a diagnosis with no supporting evidence, like bi polar, I was diagnosed BP at 13 after talking to a doc for 5 minutes, never have showed any mania or cycling. I was actually autistic with ADHD, BP is an extremely common misdiagnosis for autistic woman and those AFAB.
I was diagnosed with 14 mental health disorders over 30 years before being diagnosed with autism. A couple were right but most of them were wrong.
@@terminaldeity It is gatekeeping when they make it so hard to get an autism diagnosis. Most mental problems can be diagnosed very easily. You just see a psychiatrist. One session and you have a diagnosis. Autism is a long waiting list, expensive or both. It takes a special appointment of 3+ hours for an autism assessment.
Also, many mental health professionals discourage adults from getting an autism diagnosis. This happened to me and many other adults who later received a diagnosis of autism.
Those are two ways of gatekeeping an autism diagnosis.
Self diagnosis is so very valid! I am diagnosed late in life at 37, the same time as my teenage daughter.
I haven’t personally come across any videos of someone claiming to be autistic and get the feeling they are faking it, haven’t had any red flags pop up. Where are all of these creators faking autism? They all seem genuine to me, my pattern recognition is very keen, and I can spot a disingenuous person quite accurately. I’ve noticed a large correlation with women or those AFAB being accused at a much higher rate, as a woman who can mask decently, it makes me so angry!
Changed my sub to "all" because I want to see more content from you. Maybe it's the maturity.
Thanks, Andrea!
Love this, Mike! Your take on this is spot on. Very insightful.
I also cringe for any ND in this audience that were pretending to enjoy this for fear of standing out. Extremely tone deaf comic! He won't go far without some humility.
Thanks, Scott. Yes, I did think that - it might be entertaining noise but it could put people back.
I’m pretty sure I’m on the spectrum. Never used tik tok, so idk what’s happening over there. I’m in my 30’s and have had many struggles in life. Did lots of research into my mental health, and life issues, not even thinking about Autism. A lot of things lines up, started asking my family things like “did I do anything weird as kid? Did I have any strange behaviors?” And such. They told me a buch of things that line up with undiagnosed ASD. A few things I’ve always had issues with were insomnia, stomach issues, and severe chronic migraines. No medical professional could ever find anything wrong with me. For decades. My only issue is, where I live the cost of an assessment is in the thousands, and most will only asses children. I’m not looking to be Autistic, I just want to know what the hell is up with me. If I am, I have my answer and I can stop worrying and just rock in with life finally understanding myself for the first time in my life. If I’m not, cool, but I’m going to keep searching. The professionals dont know, so I’m on my own doing research and have been for a long long time. At this point it seems like I’m the only one who can help me and will actually put work in. But so much lines up. I’ve talked to friends I know who are diagnosed, who would know better than people who actually are on the spectrum. After having heartfelt conversations with them, they all either said “I could have told you that! Why didn’t you ever ask?”, “heeeeey! You sound just like me!”, or “oh, wow, I thought you already knew that?” So, like what do I do with that? Lmao some told me I was definitely on the spectrum and getting the assessment would be a waste of time to hear something I should already know and has been obvious to everyone around me. So if people who are actually diagnosed are saying that and not even getting offended. I can function enough to work and live life almost normally, although it’s difficult. Man, I honestly just want to know, no matter what the outcome is. I just want the truth whatever it is. Like I went through all of my medical records, my history, family history, and a lot of my moms side of the family are on the spectrum, some need lots of support, others not so much, so hereditary for sure. Also, people say because I do have to obsessive hobbies, sensory issues, my social issues. It took me until I was almost 20 to understand sarcasm. I’m not gonna say everything, it’s too much, but a lot overlaps, but I wont say I am until I have answers. But yeah, I was more shocked that people were like “yeah, we know” instead of “how dare you?” So idk what to think or how to progress at this point.
Yeah, and what Dan doesn't mention is that professionals didn't bother to learn much about autism so there aren't many experts in it. Most people pass around the diagnosis responsibility. It's obviously not taught well to psychology majors. The horrific ABA still exists. That makes me lose any respect or trust for the psychology profession as a whole. And for politicians who have done nothing to protect autistic people (who are the most discriminated against in the workplace).
Thank you Mike and Sabre :)
I've also got folders, but they're digital ... despite me being old enough to be retired :)
And on that, my age limits the chance of getting support (on the grounds that I'm no longer working and thus "don't need anything"!), but I've also had many decades of masking to undo, and people like that pseudo "comedian" (perhaps, if he is the opposite of comedian, that "naidemoc") don't help me nor society in general, as society is better in every way when it is progressive and inclusive.
On the other hand, you DO help, so, again, thank you Mike and Sabre :)
Thank you, Kayleen! My folder was digital, too! (Although I made printouts…). 📚
I self diagnosed with ADHD for about half a year and i finally got an official diagnosis last January :))
Something I think is important, is that recent statistics are saying 1 in 36 children are autistic, previously it was thought to be 1 in 2,500. Can you imagine how many people have been missed? How many people will never know they’re autistic? How many people who are only now finding out they’re autistic?
I would have chosen a work at home career for sure. Too late now. (or at least one with mostly neurodivergent people in it . . .Not a hospital full of sociopaths who stab each other in the back.
Another good video Mike, very on point. Still masking here and self diagnosed for now 😊
Perfectly valid, Helen! And, very nearly the first commenter on this unannounced video drop lol! 😂😂
@Autistic_AF You were just checking to see if I was awake weren't you! I'm also getting back on to MC in a bit, my back is a bit better now, so fancy starting a new project, maybe the welcome centre 🤔 😆 or maybe an octopus 🐙 😀
@@BlueRoseHelen252I vote for the octopus 🐙. By the way. I jumped on as soon as I saw the notification, but there is just no possibility of beating you to it 😅
@pardalote 😆 yes I'm thinking Octopus too, I am wide awake tonight after sleeping off my bad back pain, so this evening I'm going to be awake a while.
@@BlueRoseHelen252 I am glad to hear your back is a bit better 💜
Thank you for covering this. I don’t really have words right now for that comedian, other than his ignorance is shocking.
Fantastic video, covered all the things. I just found you the other day. Amazing tribe of cats 😺
I love your username!
I paid $1,700 for an assessment or would have had to wait two years. The evaluation was negative, even though I have many traits and scored highly on a standardized test I found recommended online. I found out later that in the province where I got the assessment, I would have received a monthly stipend from the government for life if I had fallen below some income threshold, so I am still determining what I believe. I decided to skip knowing and think of my life without the pathology label while having solid suspicions. Thank you for this discussion. When I think of my earnest attempt to understand why I am specific ways, that comedian is offensive. It was anything but whimsical. Mind map. I love it.
My parents both have different types of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I was never allowed to set boundaries and if I ever dared to, I got physically and emotionally abused for even trying. Throughout my life, people just stepped over me and abused me in any way- employers, friends, partners, my siblings, even my children. I'm self-diagnosed for about three months and have healed tremendously from my cptsd in only two years, due to learning about the abuse, learning to recognise red flags and making huge changes in my life. Now I have only very few people in my life- no friends or acquaintances, but people I have to communicate with, on a daily basis. I'm just learning to set boundaries and I'm beginning to realise how much in my life I actuallly did and endured, that got me depressed and suicidal for 50 years.
Heck, us Boomers / Gen Jones never had opportunitues to get evaluated unles we veered way off of what was considered "normal" for children - like being very disruptive in class.
I agree - way off, Esmerelda. Way off. My dad said re; psychologists - “it just wasn’t the done thing”, which I thought was accurate.
I went to the state mental hospital in 1990 at age 15. So my behavior was off. The problem is that back then usually only level 3 autism was recognized. Asperger's wasn't in the DSM until 1994. So because I had no language delays and was a female even after 1994 my autism wasn't recognized. I don't even mask a lot. All of my problems were viewed through a mental health lens. I have been diagnosed with 14 mental illnesses (not all at the same time) over a 30 year period.
So back then even if your behavior was off you probably wouldn't have gotten an autism diagnosis. You more likely would have been diagnosed with mental problems. Especially if you were female. Or if you masked a lot as a male.
I'm about the same age as you... I can't do TikTok... just 0 interest. I don't get the draw of it. Social media wasn't a thing when I was in school... I consider myself a xennial.
I think what bothered me more than his jokes was the laughter to them. So many people thought it was funny... so it wasn't just one guy. 😭 That laughter made me feel ill...
I starting to think I might be autistic after a Mom on the Spectrum video popped into my RUclips feed and I decided to check it out. I went down a rabbit hole after that. [before youtube I thought I was "kind of ADHD" and "kind of OCD"... autism wasn't even an option because I didn't have learning difficulties and wasn't like Sheldon Cooper]. Meg was one of the ones I had a lot of "me too" or "not everyone does that?" moments watching... which was one reason why I joined her discord and there have been daily "ME TOO!"" moments there. My nurse practitioner said only kids can get free assessments and I'd have to pay thousands of dollars (I think she had to research it)... others told me there was a waiting lists of years... but I wasn't given that option and I don't have have thousands of dollars (I live alone and only work part-time). I think a diagnosis would help with my deep imposture syndrome...
I don't think I mask well... I'm just super shy and don't talk much. I did well in school and just didn't try hard enough to make friends (according to family). There's nothing wrong with me, I just don't apply myself, I don't try hard enough, I need to put myself out there more...
Here's a diagnosis for Dan Soder. Those who make their trade in cruelty often hide the deepest insecurities behind the weakest character.
I diagnosis him as NOT funny. This was a miss. He needs to work on his writing.
Self diagnosis helped - me to understand why things turned out the way they did and why often in social situations I feel I don't fit in. It came as a shock initially but then came a feeling of relief. As for the comedian on Tik Tok - not worth listening to as it is just rubbish.
An amazing video!!! Thank you so much for this conversation.
Glad you enjoyed it, Erin! 🧡
The worst part is he isn’t even funny. Like, you have one job!
Exactly! Do a funny!
Thanks for putting this out here for us man ❤
No problem 👍 🧡
Self diagnosis is valid! I was diagnosed with ADHD in the early 80s, I spent the last year researching autism once I suspected (I work in biotech as a job and I know how to do academic research), talked to many people on the spectrum, done all the usual tests, and was told many things by my mother about the autistic-like things I did as a child. While I am not formerly diagnosed, I am now very sure I am an autistic person who was never picked up when younger because I learned how to mask to get by, even if it often didnt work with coworkers over many jobs. I am not even sure at 49 if its worth seeking a formal diagnosis, especially given the track record for medical professionals with autism misdiagnosis, huge waiting lists, not to mention the stigma, and other potential fallout including being turned down emigration to some countries, higher insurance, and potential job issues. It's enough to put many people off pursuing a formal diagnosis.
Kindness, understanding, decency, civility and respect are universal values that everyone deserves to receive. Ridicule by parody is not comedy. It's just a bigot behaving like a bigot.
Do I quack like a duck? Ten years ago I visited a transgender people's support group and discovered I did, having struggled with my identity for thirty-five years after having been outed and called a pervert by my mother in my teens. For most of that time I'd considered myself an inexplicable freak of nature, but now I know about (most likely) diethylstilbestrol (DES) that was supposed to prevent my mother from having a miscarriage, and Robert Stoller's work on psychosocial development "The Transsexual Experiment" and realise that everything fits. The jigsaw was there and I was the lonely missing piece unable to make sense of my experiences. Accepting myself and coming out was like doing up a zip and becoming one whole person, not two.
So many trans people (who are out) are autistic. It is being pathologised endlessly by bigots as a reason to resist acceptance and treatment of trans adolescents for whom having the one puberty appropriate for them would be enormously life-enhancing. Yet Occam's razor shows that autistic people are relentlessly authentic and less influenced by social stigma, so are likely to reflect the proportion of trans people in a hostile and unaccepting society as a whole, most of whom never find the courage to accept themselves, let alone come out.
I didn't believe I was autistic, but I had figured out that I have CPTSD after decades of being misdiagnosed and treated for anxiety and depression. It was in a support group for CPTSD where a friend was discussing her late diagnosis of autism and ADHD and I had another "it sounds like me, do I quack like a duck?" moment. It grabbed my attention and made it impossible for me to continue to listen to her until I had my own answer and I realised that was autistic behaviour even whilst it was happening. Of course I did the self-assessments there and then, discovered that I'm autistic and ADHD AF too and rejoined the meeting. At an appropriate time (I managed to exercise self-restraint) I 'came out' to the CPTSD group and it was "Yes, it's been obvious to us since you joined, it didn't occur to us that you didn't know." A second enormous validation and tremendous relief.
Accepting myself again has made so many things make sense, including a self-harming incident when I was under ten years old and the school teachers told my parents to get me assessed, which they took as an insult, not as a call to action. Sharing my self-discovery with my adult offspring has made my eldest and youngest aware of their autism a whole generation earlier than I have and is enabling them to be compassionate towards themselves and make accommodating life choices early in their adulthood. This brings me joy beyond measure. Self-diagnosis FTW!
Thank you for sharing your story 🧡 - it’s encouraging that the trend - if there is one, seems to be towards increased awareness, and self compassion. -Mike
The electronic mind map is spectacular!!! ❤
Hi Mike! Hi Sabes! 👋 Mike, I love your mind map 💜 looks just like the sort of thing I draw for all sorts of reasons, but mine are the old fashioned pencil and paper sort.
That "comedian " literally made me feel sick. I cannot fathom such a lack of empathy and understanding of another human being's intrinsic worth and value. How is it that such mocking distain is entertainment?! Or considered funny? It makes me appreciate the genuine welcome and warmth within the Autisticats community. 🐈🐱🐈⬛❤
Hey Pardalote! Sabes waves his paw 🐾! Haha mind maps are great, I find. I like electronic over paper since I can add extra data to the nodes and move them around. It’s almost meditative.
The comedian’s comments were just nasty. 🤮
100% I have never understood the mentality of those who find it so funny to mock others or laugh when people do so.
@Autistic_AF Oh Sabes, I feel honoured that you acknowledged me 🐈⬛
Mike, I would totally appreciate you posting a video (or talking through in a live) how to do these electronic mind maps. I am a bit out of touch with the possibilities of the digital world. Sometimes, technology makes me feel like I am "old and need new paint" like Annie and Clarabel. 😄
Pardalote - it will be done! It’s on the list :)
@@Autistic_AF thanks 😊
I really love and appreciate your perspective
It's not a lifetime of feeling different for me, it's a lifetime of feeling defective when I try to live in neurotypical ways. By denying a person authority on their own lived experience and treating autism as a medical condition only, we only further the harm that people have already been subjected to
Thank you Mike and Sabes 😍
Thank you, Tracy! 🐈⬛🧡
I self diagnosed when I understood what was different about me.
The doctors didn't even see me and they said I was just depressed. 😂 Trust me I'm not depressed.
As long as you know and understand yourself then you can find like minded people to be a community with.
I would like to share a story I feel is relevant to the conversation of self-diagnosis:
A few years ago, I had to go to the ER for intense abdominal pain and nausea. The pain was so intense that I had to look up my own personal information on my phone to fill out a form. I couldn't even remember my middle name because the pain was so intense. Regardless of this, multiple nurses asked me one very important question:
"What do you think might be the issue?"
That's right, multiple medical school graduates asked me to provide my uneducated opinion on the cause of my visit. I said I wasn't sure and they encouraged me to guess. They WANTED me to self diagnose!
And I'll admit right now, my first guess was wrong. I thought it was appendicitis. The nurse immediately asked to feel around on my stomach and began putting light pressure on the area surrounding my appendix and confirmed that my guess was incorrect. But now, they had a general idea of where the pain was (it wasn't exactly over the appendix, so i helped guide her hands to where the pain was most concentrated) & knew it would not be intensified by pressing down on it. They eventually came back to me and narrowed it down to two things. I forget what one of them was, but when they said "kidney stone," I immediately blurted out that kidney stones run in my family and that was most likely it. Again, they proceeded with testing based on MY assumptions.
A good doctor knows that no amount of testing or education will allow them to feel what we feel in our own bodies. Our bodies and brains are designed to protect itself. Our self diagnoses and uneducated assumptions about our bodies can often get extremely close to reality despite our lack of medical degrees. I've heard so many stories of people being told by doctors they were fine or that tests for the condition they believed they had came back negative, but the patient was confident that something was wrong and kept demanding to be tested more by various different doctors before one finally told them they had been right all along.
So this idea that we cannot know we are autistic because we aren't doctors is ludicrous. Good dctors value the words and opinions of their patients. I may not have access to the $200 textbooks they needed to graduate, but the internet is filled with free educational resources and no amount of schooling will allow doctors to know exactly what it has felt like to exist in this body my whole life.
That question is part of the diagnostic techniques. Here’s another one, “Why do you think you might have autism?”….
Your answers will indicate to primary care doctors what to offer you.
@@Autistic_AFThat would be sensible rather than saying that you don't have it. Even if you don't have autism you might have something related.
That man is horrible, and people laugh. 😢 This is why masking even exists.
Hey Ella, yes indeed.
I was chilling with my friend, he likes listening to standup while cooking and stuff. And this guy came on. And it triggered me. I’ve NEVER been triggered by a comedian before. I’ve never really been triggered at all, but I told him “SHUT THIS OFF!” And had to go to another room and hang out with his dog for ten minutes to calm down. He played music for me to calm down, very thoughtful of him, but “Rainbow Connection “ was one of them. Now it’s a great song but it turned on the waterworks I tell ya. It REALLY made me feel like it was about autism at the moment.
While I disagree with your take on tiktok (I likely wouldn't have made my way here without some tiktok videos causing me to question my own behavior), I very much appreciate your advocacy for self-diagnosis and adult autism in general. There's a lot of throw-away content on tiktok. But there's also a lot of really great and useful material. Tiktok is unfairly (in my opinion) under fire and in danger of being banned here in the States. I think that would be a shame, not to mention the freedom of speech implications. Again, thanks very much for your work for our community, Mike. I appreciate you.
I don't care if they ban TikTok. China doesn't allow free speech. They are way worse at banning free speech than the USA. So why support China and TikTok if you are worried about free speech?
If you can say the same thing on another platform then you can still speak freely. It is if you are banned from saying something across platforms that the government is censoring you.
China uses TikTok to spy on the USA. That is a bigger issue with TikTok than free speech in my opinion.
Great video and very important topic! :)
There are also plenty of people who SHOULDN'T get diagnosed because it wouldn't be useful, practical, or even safe for them to do so.
As a high support needs person, the danger of self diagnosis is people never finding out that people like me exist. No one actually treats it like a disability anymore, making it harder to get people to understand how much help we need.
We Autistic people exist in all colors and shapes (metaphor) I think bringing awareness of the meaning of Spectrum and showing how diverse the autism community is, is a good thing. We need more support and we should fight together for getting it instead of excluding one to another.
❤
Jeannette
True. I don't like the movement claiming that it is not a disability and that we can do everything neurotypicals can, when that's simply not true. Disabled does not mean "bad" or "broken" like they seem to think it does... they're actually being more offensive denying autism being a disability than if they were to just accept everyone is different.
@@fungustheclown666 personally I believe in a mix model for disability. I recognize that there are things I can't do but that can be because of me or because of society... I find it a little disturbing when there is a positive toxic speech about autism but I also feel bad with the all negative speech (like the spot from Autism speaks)...
But invalidating someone else's experiences because they are different from mine is a whole other book...
For me more scarier than anything else is the inability to find middle ground in the ASD discussion.
I am a medium support needs person. I think everyone knows that high support needs autistic people exist. A few extremist low support needs people might try to deny it or say that we should be split up into autism and Asperger's groups again. But where do I fit then?
My problem is with people who try to claim that autism is not a disability. For me and many other people autism is a disability. Because a few people don't need much or any support doesn't mean that we all don't need support.
Autism is a disability. For most people who are diagnosed with it.
Great presentation. ❤your cats!
Thank you, Tessa! 🐈 🐱 🐈⬛ 🐈 🐱 🐈⬛ 🐈 🐱 🐈⬛ 🐈 🐱 🐈⬛ 🐈 🧡🧡
I'm sitting at about 1000 lines in Notepad++ for things I plan to print off for my formal assessment. That doesn't include the folders of report cards
otes from teachers 😅
Haha I moved to Obsidian because I needed LAYERS for my notes
I’m a Notion guy myself! 😜
Notepad++ - I KNEW IT!
@@TheLexikitty if I had realized I was going to be taking so many notes, I would have used OneNote 😅
But for some reason I thought I would just have a page or so 🤦♂️
I'll have to look into Obsidian, though. It looks like it can sync across different devices which would be handy!
As you like Notepad++ - moving to Obsidian will be very straightforward for you imo!
People self-diagnose allistism more often than not and no one seems to have an issue with it. I guess just because it’s a majority of people who are not thinking things thru of what self-diagnosis entails. It goes both ways.
How about we position diabetes, alcoholism, and autism in a group of things with some similar qualities: 1. There is a physical component - your body processes and reacts to the world in different/non-typical ways. 2. You can have a worst-case situation where you end up "sub-optimal", or you can recognize that you've got a problem and can do something to lessen or eliminate the worst effects, and 3. Self-diagnosis is what helps you respond to your condition in the way that gives you the best outcome, whether it's going to the doctor and getting medication (diabetes), or it's totally avoiding what sets things off (alcoholism), or finding ways to cope (everything from "better masking" and self-accommodation to supported accommodation). The first two conditions have become normalized, it's time to accept similarly the existence of autism.
All 3 do best with acceptance and support from the people around you. Ridicule, ostracism, and denial all simply promote sub-optimal outcomes.
As a recently *self diagnosed* AuDHD adult of 58 - finding out about ASD was a revelation to me and it made perfect sense of my life and my quirks. As cringe-worthy as it sounds, I was led down this path of discovery after watching Love on the Spectrum and having some of my ignorant misconceptions about ASD overturned. A lot of reading and ASD Tuber videos later and I don't need an official diagnosis to validate this although of course, that would be nice. But the amount to time and hassle involved is just not worth it for me. I don't need support, as I've built my life around my needs and I don't need to prove anything to anyone, so I probably never will go through the official diagnosis process. And that's okay for me.
I saw "55 signs of autism" by Orion last Thursday, not searching for symptoms, it just was there on my YT-Page and curious as I am, I guess Google knew already...
It made "DingDingDing" constantly. Yesterday I took the time and wrote every single one of those down (yeah, some are redundant), three I don't relate with and 30 I strongly relate with giving mutliple examples from my own life. By now I've made ALL Tests linked at Embrace Autism and the Monotropism one and not a single one is on the edge or "maybe" side. They're bullseye and why they shouldn't be, as Orion and 100 hours later into YT-Videos like these, it just explains everything that happend and happens in my life. I put that "I'm a weirdo, I'll never buy even a plant because that will die by my negativity into a box" and put all my energy into hiding what I couldn't explain, simulating a person that earns his money in order to make a living, that is somewhat socially accepted.
And one week later there is:
- I know why basically everything was and is the way it s in my life, I and others were wondering about
- I finally noticed being 46 years, that I'm not alone! This is a handful!
- Now I need to find a way to stop torturing myself without losing the ability to afford living
- I need to accept myself finally and need to change where I live, how I live
- An official diagnostic: Will take two years plus to even get an evaulation started. In the best case they tell me what I already know. Then I could apply for being a "disabled person" and stop working, which is incredibly hard in Germany and all the great benefits you get is that your aren't even allowed to be part workforce anymore and barely get the rent paid on "benefits" for the rest of your life. That entire process might take five years including ging to social courts. If you don't have clinical depression by then, chances are good you get it from eating pasta with ketchup every day ending up doing, what Autist peaple seem to do with that Outlook...
(Do you notice, that basically like 90% of the struggles are economically induced? I would never found out or even cared if I was financially independent in a way that would never has required masking in the first place, wearing me down)
thx for the content. thank you for sharing!
Thanks, Rick 😊
Great video.
I know I was so masked a very months ago 😅
for me a late autism diagnosis took 3 years and only 8 years after was to be tested for adhd too self diagnosis can be the way of describing the expected outcome for some on something that could take half their life to get.
Hey Jack, it takes so long - and I don’t understand why some folks wish to ‘gatekeep’ autism like it’s an invisible ring. -Mike 🧡
I've had a hard time fitting in my whole life but grew up at a time when mental healthcare was pretty much only for people whose illness makes them a danger to society. For everyone around me I was just weird so I missed the window when autism is most easily identified. Nobody ever considered the possibility of me being autistic (me included) until a couple of years ago when I had a complete meltdown at work (a different decade, a different country). I've been seeking a formal diagnosis since then. Even if it is not autism, it will help me understand myself better and navigate the situation in a way that doesn't lead to constant distress and subsequent burnout. The thing is it is extremely difficult to get a formal diagnosis. You either sit on a waitlist for a very long time, get an assessment from someone with limited experience whose final conclusion is "inconclusive" because there isn't sufficient data from your childhood or pay a large sum out of pocket to do it privately. I already got the "inconclusive" result and went through a 7-month waitlist for a specialized facility only to be told at the intake appointment that they have staff shortage and I should go find another place. I am on another waitlist now but at this point I'm not getting my hopes up I will ever get an answer, no matter how relatable the autistic experience sounds. So I understand people who try to self diagnose. If the system fails you, you can't do much else. Personally, I wouldn't label myself because I'm very sensitive to rejection and I don't want a potential different diagnosis to once again make me feel like I don't know where I belong. I do however fully understand people who do it to find peace within themselves.
i’ve noticed that it tends to be allistics who like to white knight for autistics and claim that self-diagnosis takes away from “real autistic people.”
autistics ourselves, on the other hand, tend to be much more accepting and understanding regarding self-diagnosis and autism.
Even with an official autism diagnosis you don't get much official help. If you self diagnose you will probably get no official help. So how does it harm someone?
@@Catlily5 i think you misread my comment
@@ornithowlogist I was adding to it not debating you
@@Catlily5 ohhh my bad
@@ornithowlogist 👍
I feel great distress for the self-diagnosed audience members at that show. 💔
Though, they probably aren't at that show because they have better taste in comedy
13:32, I feel like the mind map was all the proof you needed, my man.
I’m at that point in my journey and I just had to look back on an email I sent to my VP at work and I feel like I should bring that to my doctor for my assessment.
It was an email that could have been “am I correct in thinking that we do x because it would prevent y” but it was a four paragraph infodump deepdrive manifesto as to how doing x would prevent y then ending with “am I thinking about this in the correct manner”.
Like… how was I not catching this shit before.
“How was I not catching this shit before”…. Awareness 💯%
Thanks for your comment, Tyler. Appreciate that!
I think the main risks are that it can look like other things, like cptsd, and self diagnosis can prevent you from getting the care you need if that is the case. But I was self diagnosed before I was diagnosed, and then once diagnosed... There werent really resources, because I am already technically a successful adult. I could have saved myself that bill and all the time waiting if I just had faith in my own assessment. Because there aren't really many useful interventions once you are grown, are good at masking, are successfully employed. So what do you even do with that paper.
I would actually encourage many people to self diagnose, tbh. The end result is the same.
One of the interesting parts of being self-diagnosed late in life is knowing there may have been a time where I laughed with that crowd... Now I'm viscerally hurt by his words.
Growth is a funny thing, especially when it's facilitated by Tiktok (i love being part of the audhd community there)
There’s an AuDHD community on TikTok? That’s a good thing.
What is wrong with these people (the so-called comedian) who make fun of people who say they are autistic. If there were not self-diagnosed people to laugh at and bully, they would be doing the same to newly diagnosed adults. What's it to them?
Also, I have never met a neurotypical who actually understands what autism is/feels like or who would want to be autistic. On the other hand, I have never met an autistic person who said they do not want to be autistic, regardless of the difficulties, because autistic is who they are. I will never understand why so many people make such a fuss about autistic people, self-diagnosed or otherwise. There are videos of mothers of autistic children who resent the idea that not all autistic people are like their autistic child and believe there should be a different name for them.... I mean, really, come on! what is wrong with people???!!! In my world (yes, it's very small), if someone tells me they are autistic or deaf or anxious or happy or depressed or Swedish or reincarnated, I am not going to call them a liar and ask them to prove it. It is none of my business. In the case of anxious or depressed, I would probably ask if there's anything I can do, but all the others don't affect me or anyone other than them.
I get the impression that social media (tiktok, facebook, et al) have given people the impression that they have a say in what other people believe or are. Before social media, I think it would have been unthinkable to put an article in a newspaper, the equivalent of social media of the past, claiming that people are 'faking' autism or 'jumping on the autism bandwagon' without having seen a doctor. The reaction to such an article would probably have been a complete lack of interest, a healthy 'who cares?' reaction.
I've made a bunch of other comments on relevant topics but I also wanted to say that your beautiful void kitty Sabre looks just like my beautiful void kitty Jasper, and I was tickled beyond belief that you also have a Jasper kitty! (Who looks just like my old kitty Legolas.) 🖤
Hello Jasper! 🐈⬛
Sabre’s climbing all over me at the moment! Awww Legolas is a great name for a tabcat!
@@Autistic_AF he was the sweetest boy ever, I miss him. Jasper is also very sweet but very shy so I am the only person (lucky me!) who gets to witness his sweetness.
🧡🧡🐈⬛
I left a high demand/control group/religion before I ever thought I may be autistic. I find it more than a little interesting, that the resistance (and the way this resistance was expressed by) family, friends, and other members of the group, towards those who leave, is not dissimilar to the resistance shown towards those who self diagnose as autistic.
“You don’t really know”
“you’re just awkward”
“you’re doing it wrong”
“you’re just being trendy”
“you don’t want to conform”
“you’re just lazy”
Hi Tam, me too. I was in a highly controlling religion throughout my teenage years and left in my mid twenties. I can see similarities too. I think you might be right. -Mike 🧡
I really appreciate your channel. I feel like I have a community here. I began with a question; could I be autistic? Research and time with other adult autistics lead to a self diagnosis. Of course, me being a good little psychologist, I couldn’t accept only a self diagnosis, so for my own peace of mind, I sought a formal, medical, diagnosis. Well, big shock, turns out that I’m quite the clever autistic guy and had been well masking it for decades. But, autistic nonetheless. My point is however, it all began with the question.
Any way. Thanks for another video. I appreciate you.
😅 oh that digital collage of Donald Triplett's TikTok will haunt me for days. That was brilliant 😂
I think he’d have liked it!
i m a self-diagnosed audhdier i never go to any kind of therapy before ı become 15 (bc my parents doesn't really believes its sth needed and thought i m fine even tho i m f*cking not), i never need any speech therapy, i talked very early even (i was able to say words while 9-10 months old and when i m 16-18 months old i was able to talk in sentences, answer questions and walk freely without any help) but i have extreme sensory issues just a sec ago i cried while trying to wash a dirty glass bc it felt soo bad, i was trying my best but couldn't help it... in the end i put some gloves (the gloves weren't for washing dishes so they make me feel weird when its wet) on and washed it like that which was not the best maybe but it was more bearable than before. its only one of my struggles in my daily life and just bc i didn't get a speech therapy or didn't get a official diagnosis you can't say i m lying, my struggles are real and i m struggling with those for a long time now, i can't even mask it properly for gods sake! my self-diagnosis is valid and if you don't accept it you can jump of a cliff or whatever just leave me alone, i already had it enough
It seems to me that the definition of autism has expanded greatly in recent years. When I was younger, a person who was autistic was nonverbal or inappropriately verbal, completely wrapped up in his own world, oblivious to other people and unable to form or uninterested in relationships with humans. They were often VERY interested in THINGS, like machines, electronics, THE PHYSICAL WORLD, but anything SOCIAL was scary to them. Now, autism covers many who are only slightly different, or have the trait you talked about - monotropism- and usually have social anxiety and awkwardness. This is why there are so many more who now fall onto the autism spectrum.
I live near a fairly large metro area and I still cant find someone who evaluates ADULTS I’ve emailed over 7 so far. All the same response. I started copying and pasting my long scripted message explaining why I would like an eval lol
When you go to many professionals and they take 15 minutes to diagnose you as depressed or anxious... don't care when you say the medication doesn't work, because they know better... when your psychologist laughts at you because you say you relate to X or Y.... it's just normal you will self diagnose. This week my test results came out... The psychologist pretty much said since I have a IQ above average I do not have ADHD or ASD.
That’s horrible, Dani 😞 the psychologist needs retraining. The DSM-5 and ICD-11 both provide for ASD with or without learning difficulties/intellectual disability.
@@Autistic_AF thank you! I'll keep looking for help ❤️
Good luck 🤞 🧡
I'm self-diagnosed due to me getting confused in any form of social interaction, added to my anxiety, & over-thinking trying to both answer the question that's being asked & second guessing the follow-up & tailoring my answer to make the answer to the second question easier; Not to mention my speech apraxia. I've seen about 7 medical professionals, only 1 of them guessed I might have autism, but I was far too confused to be to understand what she was saying.
There’s a lot to say about this topic (once I calm down from the intense anger caused by that comedian’s video) but I wanted to say…
I’m reading (well listening) to Untypical as well! Great book
It’s the next Tea and Tails book club book!
@@Autistic_AFTea and Tails!? What’s that? I feel like a failed fan as I should know that having watched nearly every non-live video of yours… 😅
Bookclub! There’s a playlist on my channel. Next video coming soon!
And no you’re not failed! It’s been so lovely to have you on the channel, dude! -Mike
Omw I never knew about the books and binders that it's not just a me thing l😂l i love that
I struggled to find a specialist but my journey started with documenting everything I could from childhood to recent day to show the specialist and to be prepared. It makes me happy to know I am not alone.
This was a great video ❤ well made
Hi Kati! 👋, thank you - and well done documenting everything! Research mode for the win! -Mike
@Autistic_AF thank you! Someone gets it!!! I'm not alone hehe 😉
Definitely not alone. 🧡 #oneofus
For me that 'comedian' is just proudly expressing his ignorance about the topic, but spreading that amount of hate and misinformation is VERY dangerous, he's putting hurdles in the minds of their viewers so next exposure they have to autism will be worse in terms of acceptance and information seeking... So sad that people who are clearly rude and ignorant about a topic can have such an influence on people's minds because they know how to use humour with that crowd... Fuck trust! Long live verification.
Little final comment: He studied politics? Now it makes sense that he can convince a crowd with highly biased and uninformed claims as we see in that 'standup comedy' performance.
GenXer-we didnt have anything but a classroom for kids with the most obvious differences. The rest of us were just being difficult.🤣🤣🤣
13:41
Had to pause and laugh because Staples is like my candy store.
I'm self diagnosed and I am so bloody sure, my whole life and daily struggle is, after deleting all of the other things I struggle with, more than obvious. Tic toc for me, a 52 year old woman, is hell on earth. I end up there every now and then and I am totally gutted after jidt a few mins watching stuff. People are spreading dangerous stuff, people are incredibly unintelligent and they all present so horribly loud, arrogant and partially behave so evil, it triggers me horribly
For the love of God, when you can't get help from the medical community, WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO????? god I got sent to a neuropsych by my neurologist who had hoped I could get assessed for add/adhd but the place she sent me DOESN'T EVEN ASSESS FOR ANYTHING we discussed - so they assessed me for alzheimers - I DON'T HAVE ALZHEIMERS! Sweet Baby Jesus.......
Please share your music playlists!!! I'd love to listen :)
Tik Tok is AWFUL 🤮
I'm self diagnosed after recently finding out at 45yo that I am also Intersex, 47XXY. After going on testosterone replacement, my Autistic traits started getting worse as the testosterone gave me more confidence and put me in more social situations. This led to a self diagnosis of Autism less than a year later. I can identify with both male and female Autistic traits. With both male and female characteristics I believe that my chances of being diagnosed professionally are very limited as I genetically don't fall into the male or female category. I will fully embrace my self diagnosis until such time as advancements in diagnosing Autism become available, such as my Intersex diagnosis which is done via a Karyotype genetic analysis of my chromosomes. I was diagnosed with ADHD and bi-polar tendancies 20 years ago. This should have been Autism and Autistic Burnout as far as I am concerned, and was a common misdiagnosis back in the day because it exhibits many similar traits.
You are diagnosed using "male" traits of autism! Everyone is. The research they did for autism assessments was almost all done on males.
So I wouldn't let that aspect stop you from getting diagnosed.
like you said, that audience seems to laugh at anything. what a weak routine and pitiful humans
Probably just a drunk and inebriated audience.
@@Autistic_AF yeah, no doubt. I think you'd have to be pretty gone to survive his set
There are so many reason it's difficult to get officially diagnosed as an adult. Here if you can't fork over 3-5 grand for a private assessment forget about it... And that still doesn't guarantee that those doing the assessment will be experienced enough to know how to spot autism in adults. I've heard of people going through multiple assessments before getting a diagnosis. Like, I'm a single person with a mortgage. That isn't feasible for me.
The whole Tik Tok thing is annoying in the sense that it gives people an excuse to invalidate others. I don't think MOST self diagnosed autistic people are doing so off of a few videos they saw online... Some people may be self diagnosing because they think it makes them "quirky" but most of us know it's not like that at all.
I first suspected I was on the spectrum almost 20 years ago and the more information I've gathered (which is a ton, being how I am...) the more sense it makes. I'm still finding out stuff (as more and more is known about autism, particularly in women) that is like light bulb after light bulb. Heck psychologists apparently suspected I had "high functioning autism" when I was 6 but for whatever reason I wasn't given the proper testing. I think I just wasn't deemed as "autistic enough" or my parents didn't push for further testing. I think I probably would have been given a PDD-NOS diagnosis back then if I had been specifically assessed for autism. Later in life as I learned to mask and then tried to get tested as an adult I was told (after a quick appointment with a psychiatrist who clearly knew little about autism), "Oh you can make eye contact and hold a conversation. Plus you have friends. You can't be autistic..." Then I went back, that time bringing in psychological assessments I had done in childhood, and he changed his tune a bit, saying it was possible, but he more so thought I just had social anxiety (I don't. I've researched and compared it to ASD. ASD makes WAY more sense). Nothing ever happened after that. So here I am. Armed with literally YEARS of information and nothing I can do with it. I honestly never flat out say "I'm autistic" but I still hardly tell anyone that I suspect I am because of the backlash that usually receives.
Hi Saber 👋🏽 my favourite part are the endings 🐈 I love cats 💜 that “comedian” is evil and would happily remove anyone who isn’t a bully like him from society and this is why so many NT’s don’t stand up for anything because they don’t want to be targeted by bullies like him! But it’s okay for us to be his punching bag! His words made me cry because as a 38 y/o black woman, life is hard and society is so unkind to me. The struggle to even be accepted to be put forward for assessment has been a battle in itself and I have to wait 2 years to get fully assessed. I’m thinking to go private, but that in itself is hard for me to navigate…anyway he is an idiot and so are his audience for laughing so hard! Cowards!
Hello! 🐈⬛
Awwww I’m so glad you’re enjoying the end of the videos 🧡 - I’ll make a video just about the cats at some point! Your struggles are shared by so many. You’re not alone. Take care -Mike
Hi, the mind map you used looks good, would you mind sharing the name of the software please
Simplemind Pro
@@Autistic_AF Thanks
Oh my God my comment was so long. I’m so sorry but hopefully someone at least someone connects with that.😂
😂 certainly not the longest comments out community has posted! There are some essay writers in the autisticats!
My own comments will overlap a bit with the video, but hopefully expand on and supplement them well: We can be critical of something without invalidating it. Self-diagnosis has a lot of risks, both to the individual and communities at large. But so does a great deal of professional diagnosis with so many barriers to competent assessment. Autism is one of the most rapidly advancing areas of mental health disorder research, and many mental health professionals are decades behind on the accepted state of autism research and related diagnostic features.
Self-diagnosis runs risk of failures in differential diagnosis, or multiple diagnosis. Someone who has some but not all features of autism may in fact have another disorder, which would have very different methods for treatment and different standards of outcome. Someone who is autistic but who also has other disorders at play is more likely to both miss those other diagnoses and the distress they can be causing, and may try to apply autism management skills unsuccessfully to the others. And in both cases the not-fully-informed voice of these people may muddy the waters and add more confusion and possible (unintentional) distress or harm to others.
Those risks aren’t all that different from the risks associated with misdiagnosis from professionals either.
So we can be informed about and critical of the weaknesses apparent in both self-diagnosis and formal diagnosis, and also see the validity in both. In regards to self-diagnosis, generally no one else will have better knowledge of your own symptoms and experiences than you do. In regards to professional diagnosis, generally no one would have better knowledge of the disorders, their features, and the means to successfully manage them, than mental health professionals.
Both have value, ideally they should be working together.
I think universally two things are beneficial:
1. Improving our understanding of autism both at the professional and general population levels.
2. Improving access to competent and up-to-date assessment and treatment.
There's one particular guy on RUclips who basically believes that you can't be autistic if you don't have his symptoms.
However, as a self-diagnosed autistic, I do believe it's possible to be self-diagnosed, though it does take considerable insight.