The hidden roots of your pain...

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A person who lets their unconscious guide their behaviour will always make for a bad parent.
Why?
Because parenthood requires extreme responsibility which can only first come from a place of strong self-awareness.
You cannot guide someone else if you yourself lack self-direction and integrity.
This is why the greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of the parent.
The unlived life can haunt the parent if they lack self-awareness, maturity and responsibility to reconcile with their past experiences of the psyche.
It’s the abyss, the shadow which is full of self-loathing, regret and resentment of what “could” or “should” have been.
This causes the parent-child relationship to grow under bad faith.
Rumination’s or fantasies of desires for a different life abandons the conscious presence that is required for a child to grow and prosper in communion with the parent.
This lays a negative insecure foundation for both avoidance and anxiousness within the relationship.
Desire for self-interested irresponsibility rejects the supremacy and responsibility of guardianship causing the relationship to suffocate under the weight of unconscious influence and behaviour.
Let me give you some example:
Vicarious Living: parents might seek to unconsciously experience their unfulfilled dreams through their children, expecting them to achieve what they could not.
Transgenerational Trauma: Psychological issues or traumas that parents have not resolved can be unconsciously transmitted to their children. This can occur through behaviours, attitudes, and emotional responses that children absorb and internalise without explicit awareness.
Identification and Limitation: Freud's concept of identification involves children adopting characteristics and behaviours of their parents as part of their own identity development. If parents have anger problems, insecurities and are high in neuroticism children will unconsciously adopt these behaviour patterns through environmental conditioning.
Identifying and addressing these unconscious patterns of experience are fundamental to your self-development.

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