Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker: An Unbridled Rage

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  • Опубликовано: 7 янв 2020
  • Disney's failure is now complete.
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Комментарии • 38 тыс.

  • @MauLerYT
    @MauLerYT  4 года назад +18624

    Hello there!
    It's pretty crazy that it's been two years since I put out that video ranting about a crappy movie and now, here we are.
    Disney managed to make, essentially, the exact same mistake as they did in 2017 and so I have a perspective to share on the subject. This video kinda wiped me out a bit, I've been writing, editing and rendering for 3 weeks straight, little sleep/socialising but it meant getting something that normally takes about a month and a half out, in half the time.
    Thanks to that, there may be a couple of mistakes and corners cut but the message is mostly unmistakable;
    The Rise of Skywalker was awful, the sequel trilogy was a disaster...
    But I am thankful for what it brought my life. I'm thankful for you lot enjoying my content and supporting this channel. I guess this video marks the end of an era in a way, or at least the bookend for the two years. I have a bunch of big plans for 2020, I hope to see you lot there. o/
    Also, check out Shadiversity, he makes kickass Medieval media analysis videos - ruclips.net/user/shadmbrooks
    See yah next time folks...

    • @kenjithemilkman
      @kenjithemilkman 4 года назад +194

      love u mate

    • @KaneK1234
      @KaneK1234 4 года назад +151

      MauLer I love you so fucking much Mauler! Do you have a patreon?

    • @KaneK1234
      @KaneK1234 4 года назад +126

      MauLer You are honestly incredible. That can’t be understated. The most intelligent youtuber on this platform.

    • @IcePhysicsGaming
      @IcePhysicsGaming 4 года назад +64

      haha! You made me think of the cloners on Kamino when you said, "in half the time".

    • @TKUltra971
      @TKUltra971 4 года назад +76

      JJ Abrams disliked that.

  • @bentonrp
    @bentonrp 4 года назад +6527

    Rey staring at the suns means nothing to her; She's never seen them before. Luke stared out at them for 19 years hoping out there was better than where he was. Nice try Rey. Nice try stealing everything.

    • @TheAlienGangster
      @TheAlienGangster 4 года назад +475

      More like Disney stealing our childhood

    • @Taojas
      @Taojas 4 года назад +631

      Exactly. Just another example that Rey is not even a fictional character in any sense of the word but rather an Ideological construct. And this is just another example of the gaping black void of total inauthenticity at the very heart of this trilogy. It is a doppleganger draped in the flayed, dead skin of the Star Wars franchise. Maybe Kathleen should change her surname to Bolton.

    • @chillyphil598
      @chillyphil598 4 года назад +304

      My favourite scene of
      Any Star Wars film. Not an original opinion but yeah her looking into them and stealing his name is so contrived. She didn’t even Bond with Luke fuck I hate Disney

    • @wacey7455
      @wacey7455 4 года назад +140

      What really bothered me about that one scene was that not only was Rey standing in the same shot with the two sun's, for some stupid reason the writer also had that stupid comic relief beach ball Droid in the same beautiful picture. It made that scene SO cheap and down right ugly. I get that they were saying the Droid was an important friend with her the entire series and they needed to be standing in the wrap up shot together, but it was so unnessesary and took away from the gravitas of what we are supposed to be seeing. Why even bother having the stupid unfunny robot be there in the ending shot? UHG.

    • @pickyphysicsstudent201
      @pickyphysicsstudent201 4 года назад +122

      I'd rather have Rey stare at something like a dual moon rise. This being something at the start of TFA, showing how she wants to escape poverty on not-Tatooine. Yeah, it sounds dumb but would be distinct and would look cool as both a parallel to the original dual sunset but as it's own spin - kind of like what most of us wished this trilogy would be.

  • @AmberSmith-zx2rp
    @AmberSmith-zx2rp 4 года назад +7391

    "I'm Rey"
    "Rey who?"
    "Uh, I don't have a last name. I'm on my own."
    "So... Solo."

    • @TheInverseGentleman
      @TheInverseGentleman 4 года назад +453

      Fucking nice

    • @LyraLyraPantsOnFyra
      @LyraLyraPantsOnFyra 4 года назад +276

      Nailed it

    • @ripwinkler1595
      @ripwinkler1595 4 года назад +462

      Rey Sand

    • @baphomathedude8057
      @baphomathedude8057 4 года назад +346

      That would actually be better then her desicrating the name Skywalker

    • @Torlik11
      @Torlik11 4 года назад +464

      @@ripwinkler1595 Does that mean she's coarse and rough and irritating and she gets everywhere?

  • @data7193
    @data7193 Год назад +1997

    Luke Skywalker: Fights a sith lord for the first time
    >Loses hand
    >Thrown down a garbage chute
    >Almost dies, needed to be rescued.
    Anakin Skywalker: Fights a Sith lord for the first time
    >Loses hand
    >Thrown into a pile of scrap metal unconscious
    > Obi Wan is also defeated, master yoda steps in
    Rey: Fights sith lord for the first time
    >wins for some reason

    • @ihatemychannelname
      @ihatemychannelname Год назад +263

      lost nothing and has the audacity to call herself a skywalker

    • @HerohammerStudios
      @HerohammerStudios Год назад +127

      You've gotta love our very own Ma-Rey Suuuuuuuueeee

    • @john_1986
      @john_1986 Год назад +111

      "You're no sith, you can barely even hold a lightsaber!"
      - Anakin to Kylo Ren voiceline in Battlefront 2

    • @dakotasherman632
      @dakotasherman632 Год назад +51

      Thry seem to have forgotten that villains are supposed to win from time to time, and be intimidating.

    • @username45739
      @username45739 Год назад +6

      "Rey: Fights sith lord for the first time
      >wins for some reason"
      1) Emu Ren wasn't a sith "lord" - he was a larper, which in itself could be taken as too much of a deconstructive/meta approach for this series.
      2) There's lots of movies where the hero wins at the end of the 1st (sometimes even only!) movie, you should watch more than just Star Wars.
      Hell Luke didn't get violently crushed after trying to taken down a gargantuan space station that shoots lasers - if he had, and then Rey did a trenchrun and won, you'd be typing "Mary Suuueeee loololol" like a mindless fg.

  • @NourArt02
    @NourArt02 2 года назад +720

    Watching 2 hours of the actual movie: ✕
    Watching 2 hours of someone roasting the movie: ✓

    • @BiggieTrismegistus
      @BiggieTrismegistus 11 месяцев назад +29

      I've never seen the sequel trilogy and I love watching RUclipss tearing them apart. It's like it's own little sub genre.

    • @Misery7531
      @Misery7531 10 месяцев назад +1

      The movie was great he's a reviews f****** suck

    • @HansVHimmelreich
      @HansVHimmelreich 5 месяцев назад +11

      @@BiggieTrismegistussadly i paid a cinema to watch these and I can tell you, the roasts of these horrible trashpiles are far more entertaining than the movies, imagine the world without consequences for your actions, that what feminists want and these movies want

    • @liamphibia
      @liamphibia 3 месяца назад +5

      They offer better insight and entertainment than the people behind these damn films.

    • @JadenMoon1475
      @JadenMoon1475 3 месяца назад +5

      *_Po sinking in the sand:_* I HATE YOU!!
      *_Rey:_* YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!! IT WAS SAID YOU'D BE MY RIVAL, NOT LOVE INTEREST!! BRING CONFLICT TO MY STORY, NOT GIVE IT A PRINCE CHARMING!!

  • @ultimatewpn
    @ultimatewpn 4 года назад +5556

    I'm going to pretend that when C3PO looked to the screen and said "I'm taking one last look at my friends", he was speaking to the audience.

    • @soulsdancetomusic
      @soulsdancetomusic 4 года назад +192

      ultimatewpn Noooo, why would you say that!?!?!?

    • @laresial
      @laresial 4 года назад +233

      And JJ Abrams killed him, and they friends in the film what did for save him?, nothing. Nothing at all. They did not mind at all about C2P0

    • @Hirnlego999
      @Hirnlego999 4 года назад +35

      @@laresial I thought that was more of Rian thing to do really, C3PO and R2D2 were not exactly much in TLJ at all.

    • @coh2conscript851
      @coh2conscript851 4 года назад +118

      Dont make me sad like that dude holy fuck

    • @Overlord734
      @Overlord734 4 года назад +180

      He was replaying a footage from ep6 celebration.

  • @shawnyboy77
    @shawnyboy77 4 года назад +29127

    I also love when Rey finds the dagger she says something like "This has done terrible things." while she holds a lightsaber that has literally slaughtered a room full of children.

    • @protheu5
      @protheu5 4 года назад +4809

      Don't you worry about the children. No one's ever really gone.

    • @kingknightisbestknight7398
      @kingknightisbestknight7398 4 года назад +2050

      @@protheu5 they are probably Force Ghosts too

    • @SennaHawx
      @SennaHawx 4 года назад +2743

      @@kingknightisbestknight7398 They're probably chasing Ghost-Anakin all over the Galaxy, so he is unable to help Jake, Kylo and Rey during the plots

    • @eras1066
      @eras1066 4 года назад +1551

      @@SennaHawx
      Stabbing his Force ankles with their Force knives.

    • @TheHalogen131
      @TheHalogen131 4 года назад +368

      Omg that is so true! I just laughed so hard!

  • @noncrete4441
    @noncrete4441 2 года назад +868

    If two lightsabers does that, image what general greivous could have done to him

    • @imperialguardproductions
      @imperialguardproductions Год назад +152

      Just imagine grievous going to tatooine and digging up those lightsabers that Rey buried in *SAND* and then killed Rey immediately and took her lightsaber. If that's how the movie ended, I would give a standing applause

    • @sijul6483
      @sijul6483 Год назад +76

      @@imperialguardproductions fine addition to my collection

    • @imperialguardproductions
      @imperialguardproductions Год назад +29

      @@sijul6483 you ARE a bold one

    • @kodster234
      @kodster234 Год назад +82

      "I am all the sith!"
      "And I am all the Jedi!"
      *Grievous bursts in*
      "And I have all the lightsabers!"

    • @StarWarsomania
      @StarWarsomania 6 месяцев назад +2

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @Fleetches
    @Fleetches 2 года назад +475

    Disney: It's canon.
    Me: No, it's not.

    • @Goibniu001
      @Goibniu001 Год назад +6

      Some political freak's wet dream.

    • @brodeyleembruggen9910
      @brodeyleembruggen9910 Год назад +3

      💣

    • @iana3892
      @iana3892 Год назад +12

      Me: What you think are some kind of Jedi waving your hand around like that?!

    • @mariussielcken
      @mariussielcken Год назад +2

      It's a canon-destroying canon

    • @All2Meme
      @All2Meme Год назад +5

      The Disney canon has misfired.

  • @vahlok1426
    @vahlok1426 4 года назад +2853

    They killed the extended universe for this.
    They killed Kyle Katarn, Dash Rendar, Luke's New Jedi Order, Dark Forces, most of the KOTOR lore, all the post-trilogy novels- all of it.
    For this.
    I can't believe *this actually happened.*

    • @0x777
      @0x777 4 года назад +266

      They also killed the careers of Kathy Kennedy, Rian Johnson and Jay Jay.
      So at least something good came out of those movies.

    • @0x777
      @0x777 4 года назад +12

      @Jimb0 Who did award it, Warner Bros?

    • @maximus6844
      @maximus6844 4 года назад +169

      They also killed Galen Marek and replaced him with Space Aladdin.

    • @vahlok1426
      @vahlok1426 4 года назад +87

      @Megan Todd As a follow up to Clone Wars, Rebels is underwhelming to say the least. Only episodes I truly ended up liking was the ones featuring Vader and the one where Obi-Wan and Darth Maul had their final showdown.

    • @vahlok1426
      @vahlok1426 4 года назад +54

      @Megan Todd Yeah I was super hyped for Thrawn to make a return, only for him to barely be anything close to the original

  • @gyst8878
    @gyst8878 4 года назад +9864

    This is how a generations spanning franchise dies, with roaring laughter.

    • @estebancuadra02
      @estebancuadra02 4 года назад +188

      Gyst Underrated gem of a comment

    • @shaecouture7480
      @shaecouture7480 4 года назад +217

      And thunderous Faps

    • @GrayderFox
      @GrayderFox 4 года назад +286

      I mean, this *is* a fucking tragic waste of a story but I had to avoid busting a gut laughing in public after hearing the Empire lost *because they couldn't go up*.

    • @hoosier3060
      @hoosier3060 4 года назад +34

      Gray guess they needed space viagra or something...

    • @marredcheese
      @marredcheese 4 года назад +29

      Unfortunately, like Palpatine, Star Wars has been dead before...

  • @spoon9854
    @spoon9854 Год назад +633

    The dark side of Disney is a path that leads to many badly written sequels some would consider.. uncanonical

    • @whaguitars
      @whaguitars Год назад +9

      LOL

    • @theenclave4981
      @theenclave4981 11 месяцев назад +15

      They need to remake the sequels, pretend these never existed and set it to 10 years after Endor and either use CGI to remake the OT characters or create and entirely new cast. Add Admiral Thrawn the imperial remnant and maybe Palpatine in a cloned body that Luke proceeds to defeat a few times.

    • @Mothbean
      @Mothbean 9 месяцев назад

      ​@@theenclave4981For the love of God, don't dig up and puppeteer Carrie Fisher's corpse for another movie

    • @KingDizzo86
      @KingDizzo86 8 месяцев назад +3

      @@theenclave4981it might be time to recast the original characters

    • @tylere.8436
      @tylere.8436 8 месяцев назад +9

      ​@@theenclave4981No, they need to just declare it noncanonical and just leave the saga alone.

  • @johnlocke9437
    @johnlocke9437 2 года назад +713

    Just for reference, creamy Sheev had 1080 star destroyers at Exegol. Each star destroyer has a crew of roughly 40,000 (including storm troopers). That means Sheevy Wonder had 42 million men at his disposal, at least 10 million of which were storm troopers. Why was he hiding again?

    • @Connor_Kirkpatrick
      @Connor_Kirkpatrick 2 года назад +243

      Because they don’t know how to fly up

    • @aprinnyonbreak1290
      @aprinnyonbreak1290 2 года назад +44

      Obviously to breed stormtroopers to pilot his ships.

    • @lilbill7385
      @lilbill7385 Год назад +1

      @@aprinnyonbreak1290 that’s why he’s in hiding, he participates in the breeding

    • @macgeorge8229
      @macgeorge8229 Год назад +26

      This not an excuse for the writers but for a galixy that is small like i would expect the empire haveing trillons of soldiers at its hight of whitch 10 mill is not mutch even for the huts space is big.

    • @elibethea4484
      @elibethea4484 Год назад +50

      @Mac George fair point but in the prequels 1.5 Million clones were enough to wage a galaxy wide war. If they had 10 million clones Palpitine had no reason to hide because he would know himself that 10 million is more than enough

  • @DarthDevorin
    @DarthDevorin 4 года назад +3823

    "She trains now!"
    "She trains now?"
    "She trains now."

    • @2nd_Directorate
      @2nd_Directorate 4 года назад +400

      Lets be honest, she didn´t train. She showed off her mastery of the force with never before seen force control.

    • @KneelB4Bacon
      @KneelB4Bacon 4 года назад +145

      "She flys now!"

    • @exhumedlegume8870
      @exhumedlegume8870 4 года назад +72

      Too little, _too late..._

    • @guidologo
      @guidologo 4 года назад +29

      We already had a train in solo didn't we 😉

    • @doommetaldarryl6689
      @doommetaldarryl6689 4 года назад +31

      OH MY GOD, LOOK AT HER GO!

  • @covingtown_
    @covingtown_ 4 года назад +3967

    When Ben Solo jumps down onto the giant chain and says "Ow!", this is his final line of dialogue in the whole movie. Kylo Ren/Ben Solo's final words are "Ow!". This is how the movie treats its own characters and lore.

    • @forsaken-pr5iz
      @forsaken-pr5iz 4 года назад +135

      Lol

    • @Pendragon44321
      @Pendragon44321 4 года назад +704

      Fuck....that absolutely pisses me off. I'm still so pissed about how such a shitty character he is yet he had so much fucking potential. Poor Adam Driver

    • @nightwishfan1991
      @nightwishfan1991 4 года назад +215

      Wow, that's incredibly depressing.

    • @davidredacted3769
      @davidredacted3769 4 года назад +198

      compare to lukes last lines. TLJ is shakespear compared to TROS.

    • @BasicSub
      @BasicSub 4 года назад +253

      Those are my final words regarding the trilogy. Ow!

  • @arrownoir
    @arrownoir Год назад +1130

    Rey took everything. Their legacies, their victories, their lives and even their names.
    She’s like an insatiable bottomless pit.

    • @jiggycalzone8585
      @jiggycalzone8585 Год назад +71

      In terms of the meta, Rey *is* Darth Nihilus

    • @vrika4280
      @vrika4280 Год назад +32

      This reminded me of Morty on Vindicators 3,
      J.J.: It's a miracle I actually ever destroyed anything.
      Morty: Oh, I don't know. You managed to destroy just about everything today; the villains, the heroes, the line between them, my childhood...

    • @username45739
      @username45739 Год назад

      crywhiteboi

    • @username45739
      @username45739 Год назад +1

      I mean she didn't and you're obviously misrepresenting and distorting the movie (she spent a great deal of TLJ trying to vindicate Luke and the Jedi, saying he hadn't failed Kylo and the world etc.), but hey you do you

    • @R0bot4
      @R0bot4 Год назад +39

      @@username45739 stop trolling

  • @michaelfraser1073
    @michaelfraser1073 Год назад +410

    The absolute WORST sin of this movie is how they completely destroyed Palpatine.
    In the OT and the PT, Palpatine was depicted as a master manipulator and tactician. This man spent over a decade carefully manipulating everything, including starting a galaxy-wide war, to engineer the downfall of the Jedi and the establishment of the Republic. He managed to manipulate the Republic against itself, ensuring that not only was the Republic dismanted, but the Senators would cheer it on. He managed to delibaretely manipulate the own great hope of the Jedi to the dark side.
    In this pile of ass, he creates a fleet but doesn't use it, and then alerts the galaxy to his presence before his fleet is ready.

    • @sologamer3122
      @sologamer3122 8 месяцев назад +29

      Honestly as much as I love Luke, Palpatine got the worst character assassination

    • @jacobmonks3722
      @jacobmonks3722 8 месяцев назад +13

      Palpatine in the original trilogy was just a dude in a chair who was incredibly arrogant and incredibly powerful. He didn't have really any layers to him until the prequel trilogy. But he still had a great and imposing presence, but not as much as Vader himself.

    • @juliebartlett4222
      @juliebartlett4222 6 месяцев назад +18

      @@jacobmonks3722 I direct your attention to his arrival on the Death Star as an indication that you are not correct. When he emerges from the shuttle, the first thing you see clearly is his hands. His hands are almost always in frame when he is. He is meant to be seen as a master manipulator, and his goading and taunting of Luke throughout their meeting is indeed masterful.
      His downfall is that he underestimates the power of love, something he lacks.

    • @jacobmonks3722
      @jacobmonks3722 6 месяцев назад +3

      @juliebartlett4222 Yes, but I wouldn't call that a particularly interesting or deep character. Thematically appropriate? Sure. Memorable? Absolutely. Like I said, just the feeling of his presence is his best quality. But did anybody really watch the OT and think, "I bet this guy has a lot of interesting interpersonal relationships and drama in his life and has a very compelling motivation for doing what he does." I'm willing to bet the number of people who actually thought that in the 80s was in the single digits.

    • @StarWarsomania
      @StarWarsomania 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@jacobmonks3722 Did you actually, you know, WATCH the OT?

  • @RawkL0bster
    @RawkL0bster 4 года назад +13765

    “Who are you”
    “Rey”
    “Rey who”
    Rey looks to the distance to see Luke and Leia and the gives a little smirk on her face as she opens her mouth and says...
    “Rey’d Shadow Legends. With over 16 million downloads, Raid shadow legends is free, turn based game with over 400 characters to collect. The devs add 16 champions each month and are constantly updating the game.”

    • @vladtepes2667
      @vladtepes2667 4 года назад +459

      Is this a crossover with Count Dankula?

    • @gerwynjones6862
      @gerwynjones6862 4 года назад +129

      Raya godess of the earth, wonder if she has male genitalia too.

    • @csh8451
      @csh8451 4 года назад +298

      Ah, I see you're an internet historian as well.

    • @RawkL0bster
      @RawkL0bster 4 года назад +59

      @@gerwynjones6862 Long as it's feminine male genitalia.

    • @Fangorum
      @Fangorum 4 года назад +16

      @@gerwynjones6862 - Pffff... Hwa, Hua, haaa: shezzz aw Pout-clown-sneez - so yes‽

  • @treasurecave431
    @treasurecave431 4 года назад +1996

    The force awakens : where is luke
    The last jedi : who is luke
    The rise of skywalker : why is luke

    • @skyguy8786
      @skyguy8786 4 года назад +126

      the sequel trilogy is abt the undoing of luke

    • @treasurecave431
      @treasurecave431 4 года назад +151

      @@skyguy8786 yup and specifically anakin too. And the irony is a fucking palpatine is the last one standing.

    • @cyclone4273
      @cyclone4273 4 года назад +32

      @@treasurecave431 At this point its all about palpatine

    • @cranbury25
      @cranbury25 4 года назад +127

      The Force Awakens : Fuck the OT
      The Last Jedi : Fuck the PT, OT, & TFA
      The Rise of Skywalker : Fuck the PT, OT, TFA, & TLJ

    • @niewesoa5299
      @niewesoa5299 4 года назад +75

      But no one ever really asks how is luke

  • @joak9992
    @joak9992 Год назад +121

    I don't know why anyone asks why Kylo is so angry all the time. I'd be angry all the time if I was in these movies too.

  • @sparco956
    @sparco956 Год назад +247

    "Cloning techniques only the Sith knew"
    "Wait didn't the Galactic Republic fight a war with clones back in the day?"
    "Force-shut up"

    • @Philip54622
      @Philip54622 Год назад +1

      Its as stupid as hux saying that they need to destroy the Republic because they support the resistance, like what the actual fuck how is 100 people and one cruiser so much more important than a whole galactic wide government with a proper army and navy.

    • @liamphibia
      @liamphibia 3 месяца назад +4

      *THE CLONE WARS EXISTS, JJ!*

    • @JadenMoon1475
      @JadenMoon1475 2 месяца назад

      ​@@liamphibia:
      Evil guy once in command, loses command, makes a clone to take the throne while he acts as the puppeteer from the shad- *_WHAT THE FUCK?!?!? ALL YOU LAZY ASSES DID IS RIP OFF THE "Arise, Serpentine, Arise!" FROM THE SHOUT FACTORY G.I. JOE CARTOON!!!!!!_* Give me a fucking break!!!!!

    • @JadenMoon1475
      @JadenMoon1475 Месяц назад

      ​@@liamphibia: *_THAT_* is why you can literally roast the "SeQuEl TrIlOgY" by *_QUOTING THE PREQUELS!!!_*
      Seriously! Pretend for a minute you had your mind wiped - You know, what they did to C-3PO *_TO PROTECT LEIA FROM PALPATINE!!!_* - and you watch ANH where Luke asked Obi-Wan: "You fought in the clone wars?". Now watch the prequel trilogy - Attack of the Clones in particular.
      Tell me you weren't excited for that huge battle on Geonosis!!

  • @Milkra
    @Milkra 4 года назад +11728

    “I am all the sith”
    “And I am all the Jedi”
    Someone was paid to write this

    • @MediumRareOpinions
      @MediumRareOpinions 4 года назад +1215

      "I'm every women, its all in me..."

    • @spandsbab
      @spandsbab 4 года назад +915

      Obi-Wan: Anakin you were the chosen one! Rey to self: Hihihi, I am the ONLY one... How to ruin 40 years of Star Wars in just 2 sentences...

    • @Thatslifebro_
      @Thatslifebro_ 4 года назад +432

      I AM THE LAAAAAWWWWW!

    • @scottski02
      @scottski02 4 года назад +429

      @@MediumRareOpinions "I'M EVERY WHAMEN!"
      --Batwoman trailer

    • @jgfear
      @jgfear 4 года назад +389

      And I am Iron Man

  • @edmonddantes563
    @edmonddantes563 4 года назад +3316

    Who are you ?
    “Rey”
    “Rey’d shadow legends”

    • @Ramacastelo
      @Ramacastelo 4 года назад +53

      I laughed out loud. I thank you!

    • @DMitr0
      @DMitr0 4 года назад +23

      comment of the decade contender 😂
      starting off 2020 extra strong huh 😅😏

    • @iiEchoUK
      @iiEchoUK 4 года назад +29

      This is the most ambitious comment of 2020

    • @dongxx
      @dongxx 4 года назад +2

      🙃

    • @hartianx1698
      @hartianx1698 4 года назад +4

      Pretty sure I saw that somewhere else but it's still chuckleworthy

  • @paulyb2405
    @paulyb2405 2 года назад +196

    I go back to the originals. Like many I've seen and read pretty much everything there is about the Galaxy Far, Far Away. I've been involved in this journey, following all our heroes and anti heroes for over forty years. I was in a packed cinema for Rise of Skywalker. At the end when Rey is asked "Who are you?" And she replies "I'm Rey, Rey Skywalker." Two people from different sections of the cinema called out "No you're not!" To which a gaggle of laughter went around the audience as they left their seats to walk out. On the way home it hit me. After forty plus years and the galaxy sized adventures I've been on with countless characters it ended in laughter. People actually laughing at the ending. I found that sad, still do. What a way to go out.

    • @jaieregilmore971
      @jaieregilmore971 2 года назад +21

      Depressing right that why I believe Star Wars ended in return of the Jedi and is the happy ending to Star Wars which looking at the six movies it didn’t need a sequel and honestly the Disney trilogy is not a story worth telling.

  • @cpl.oralove425
    @cpl.oralove425 Год назад +202

    I come back often to these. They make me not feel alone in my own UNBRIDLED RAGE.

    • @whaguitars
      @whaguitars Год назад +8

      Agree I'm re-watching Drinkers and Maulers reviews.

    • @haoyuezheng6082
      @haoyuezheng6082 Год назад +4

      same. Even every swear word is used on point lol

    • @0That_Guy0
      @0That_Guy0 Год назад +2

      Try out the reviews from E;R, you might enjoy those too! He went ballistic with this trilogy.

    • @BiggieTrismegistus
      @BiggieTrismegistus Год назад +5

      I'm not a huge Star Wars fan and have never seen the sequel trilogy, yet I love the various long RUclips videos shitting all over these movies. So many beloved franchises have been wrecked over the last few years; my beloved Star Trek, Doctor Who, Marvel Comics and DC Comics have suffered the same fate as Star Wars. There's something cathartic about seeing how pissed off so many fanbases are nowadays. Star Wars fans are as sick of this shit as everyone else.

  • @burr69
    @burr69 4 года назад +7110

    This entire trilogy could’ve been redeemed if Rey, at the end, said “I’m Rey palpatine” and then electrocuted that old lady

    • @marekkralik8290
      @marekkralik8290 4 года назад +836

      Well,shit ... I agree holy fucking shit that woud be hillarious.

    • @griffith4723
      @griffith4723 4 года назад +448

      No, no, no. It would’ve been funnier if she said “the force is female” out of nowhere and electrocute her with the sky instead of her hands. She then proceeds to be in every episode and movie and issue of Star Wars media and make it a fucking comedy, while being an all-out feminist.

    • @adrianogoulartcarvalho7144
      @adrianogoulartcarvalho7144 4 года назад +229

      The movie would still have a lot of problems, but at least it would've been something

    • @somedude5581
      @somedude5581 4 года назад +263

      The only way to fix this trilogy is to retcon and reboot episodes 7-9.

    • @zenosol234
      @zenosol234 4 года назад +157

      @@somedude5581 and maybe this time, actually plan ahead. write more than a single episode instead and just make up more as you go along

  • @toganium4175
    @toganium4175 4 года назад +2853

    Remember in The Force Awakens when Han Solo said, "that's not how the force works!"
    That line applies to this whole film.

    • @nont18411
      @nont18411 4 года назад +77

      Dwebly II Hate to admit it but having Han back as a force ghost still make more sense than Han as a “mEmoRY”

    • @skittybug6937
      @skittybug6937 4 года назад +58

      @@nont18411 I mean, at least there's precedent to Han wielding a lightsaber in Empire. One could construe that as having at least a weak connection to the force (as JJ intended with Finn). But when Ryan went nowhere with that...UGH. This is why you don't let multiple directors with opposing creative visions take over from each other in the middle of an arc.

    • @niahoad
      @niahoad 4 года назад +23

      Or when poe yelled: Tell us, you have a plan!

    • @KingOfAllDragoons
      @KingOfAllDragoons 4 года назад +6

      Nirawit Karnjanasomwong especially since Kylo didn’t even know Han that well

    • @patricklemire9278
      @patricklemire9278 4 года назад +3

      all three of them .....the TNHTFW Trilogy.

  • @Taktaagic
    @Taktaagic 2 года назад +171

    I will never get tired of hearing people call the connection thing between Rey and Kylo “Force Skype Calling”

    • @JadenMoon1475
      @JadenMoon1475 2 месяца назад +1

      Minus the stupid part each sees the other's surroundings & appearance - *_That stupid part Rey tells Kylo to please put a shirt on_* - it's just basic telepathy. The Family Guy spoof of ESB; "Something, Something, Something, Dark Side", even poked fun at it.

  • @EvanSol919
    @EvanSol919 Год назад +251

    I feel bad for all the actors. I'm sure they all signed up thinking this was going to be an amazing experience but ended up being victims of a bunch of higher ups that didn't know what they were doing.

    • @legendarydavo
      @legendarydavo 8 месяцев назад +8

      Honestly definately don't blame them. You have the money and potential future job prospects... why wouldn't you.

    • @juliebartlett4222
      @juliebartlett4222 6 месяцев назад +2

      @@legendarydavo It is true that one does not say "no" to Disney and have a career afterward.

    • @aronthedev3074
      @aronthedev3074 5 месяцев назад +4

      Especially John Boyega. He was so excited to play that character in TFA and by the TRoS he looks so defeated.

  • @steel8231
    @steel8231 4 года назад +3845

    I still cant get over how they said throughout the entire movie, "Dont be afraid of who you are" and then Rey goes and ditches her name because she's afraid of dealing with the Palpatine name.

    • @loukes7758
      @loukes7758 4 года назад +48

      Steel well Leia says “never be afraid of who you are” and then Rey sees a vision of herself from the dark side and the vision says “don’t be afraid of who you are” and then hisses at her. To me, that image of herself was mocking Leia and trying to show her how terrifying the person she could become truly is. I think it’s fucking awesome.

    • @loukes7758
      @loukes7758 4 года назад +2

      BELLA ben solo

    • @Debicus
      @Debicus 4 года назад +46

      @@loukes7758 Eh. Too little too late for Rey.

    • @wourag3885
      @wourag3885 4 года назад +9

      I actually thought she took the name cos she wanted to bang Kylo, so thought it was spiritually hers 🤷‍♀️

    • @steel8231
      @steel8231 4 года назад +29

      @@wourag3885 if that was the case why wasn't Ben Skywalker's force ghost there with Luke and Leyla's?

  • @lariotmoneus241
    @lariotmoneus241 3 года назад +2313

    Rey ended up right back where she started, on a desert planet, lying to herself about her family, and hoping for someone to return. How are we supposed to see this as hope? How is that a character arc?

  • @togepiss
    @togepiss Год назад +176

    It's so sad watching the director hopelessly stare at his cast for the smallest form of affirmation

    • @BiggieTrismegistus
      @BiggieTrismegistus 11 месяцев назад +55

      It _would_ be sad but that director is loathsome hack JJ Abrams so it's actually heartwarming to watch.

    • @All2Meme
      @All2Meme 5 месяцев назад +10

      @@BiggieTrismegistus The JJ stands for JarJar, so it all fits together when you think about it that way.

    • @darkzeroprojects4245
      @darkzeroprojects4245 6 дней назад +1

      Sad in a pathetic sense honestly.

  • @tunabones5534
    @tunabones5534 Год назад +96

    I don’t understand how the people responsible for this could let this happen unless everyone involved with the writing absolutely despises Star Wars

  • @mauridelb
    @mauridelb 4 года назад +1916

    It is ironic that this trilogy tries to be so "nostalgic" and offers "fanservice", but at the same time destroys the entire history of the original trilogy.
    Everything the heroes of the original trilogy did was in vain.

    • @annnee6818
      @annnee6818 4 года назад +67

      Yes. It would make me furious if it wasn't so sad. I'm ignoring everything after the OT because 90% of it stinks.

    • @krieghart5515
      @krieghart5515 4 года назад +78

      Yeah, what was the point of fan service when the fans it was servicing will notice how it undermines what the fans were fans of to begin with? Fuckng stupid and incompetent to the point of chaotic villainy.

    • @Alknix
      @Alknix 4 года назад +3

      Now it wasn't. That was then, this is now. Nobody promised that evil would be vanquished forever, and if that's what you imagined, it's your problem. There was a 30 year gap, for fuck's sake! You know what that equals to? The gap between WWI (you know, "the war to end all wars') and WWII. I wonder if there might be some parallel here.

    • @2nd_Directorate
      @2nd_Directorate 4 года назад +94

      @@Alknix What you say makes absolute sense...IF it would be a new evil. Using the "old" one, who was allready defeated is straight up making the OT and everything our heroes did obsolete.
      And btw your analogy doesn´t hold truth, as there were different "evils" but i guess that escaped you. You just saw the WW I and WW II title and thought it is a continuation and belongs together...

    • @krieghart5515
      @krieghart5515 4 года назад +51

      @@Alknix That's nice you came up with all that, but the problem is they don't tell the story of how that happened. It's more or less fine for it to happen but it also has to make sense. The writers make no attempt at explaining anything, they just pitch the accomplishments of the OT off the roof just so they can copy it in a flashier, meaningless way.
      Disney Star Wars is a plagiarizing, greedy abomination that failed to capture what made the OT last all these years, which is a simple story and fleshed out, relatable characters who are shown to care about each other.
      Hell, most movies to come out in the last few years have been exploiting sensitive topics in order to appear on the moral good side when in actuality, they're just selling what's trendy. They don't care about equality or activism, only what they think will sell. If they had worked on the writing on top of pushing sensitive topics in an escapist adventure IP, they probably would stand to make exponentially larger stacks of cash, so it just shows how incompetent they are on top of their greed.
      It's indefensible unless you're completely delusional.

  • @britbloc123
    @britbloc123 4 года назад +16264

    This entire trilogy was just about Rey taking everything from Luke: His Lightsaber, his powers, his friends, his loved ones, his homestead, even his name.

    • @matthewcollins4773
      @matthewcollins4773 4 года назад +2508

      His purpose. His legacy.

    • @shuyuwang6122
      @shuyuwang6122 4 года назад +2733

      A palpatine taking everything from a skywalker

    • @SCWRMComms
      @SCWRMComms 4 года назад +1575

      Even his freaking X-Wing.
      -Jovahexeon

    • @incubussatyrius4965
      @incubussatyrius4965 4 года назад +1819

      Girl was introduced as a scavenger.
      Sounds consistent.

    • @pierrelindgren5727
      @pierrelindgren5727 4 года назад +717

      Rey is what a Java looks like underneath their hood.

  • @lordtornado3321
    @lordtornado3321 Год назад +47

    Some wise guy said this on the other side of RUclips:
    "It actually all started with the Force Awakens. It literally undid everything the original heroes achieved. Relagated Luke to an island, leia to a failed general, and Han back to his smuggling ways. Turned a rebellion that won back into a small pack of "resistance" It also narrowed the world down again to just Skywalkers and recloned Vader and the empire in Kylo and the first order. I don't know why so many people fail to see how terrible of a setup TFA was for the rest of the sequels"
    And it sums up MOST of the problems perfectly IMO.

    • @Novodantis
      @Novodantis 4 месяца назад +1

      Absolutely. TFA already fucked up the plot by the opening crawl.

  • @0That_Guy0
    @0That_Guy0 6 месяцев назад +47

    Mauler: Why are you so angry all the time?!
    Kylo: I read the script.

  • @XanderKarr
    @XanderKarr 4 года назад +2921

    “they can’t activate shield in atmosphere”
    *gungans enter the chat*

    • @thinkwithurdipstick
      @thinkwithurdipstick 4 года назад +376

      Well clearly the sith weren’t bombad enough to get their shields to work

    • @Mozoleum27
      @Mozoleum27 4 года назад +21

      A new challenger, lol.

    • @danielchew8739
      @danielchew8739 4 года назад +312

      Droideka: am I a joke to you?

    • @kylescoolclips
      @kylescoolclips 4 года назад +56

      those were rayshields, but you have a point nonetheless

    • @Mozoleum27
      @Mozoleum27 4 года назад +27

      Durge:Do you even know me? I got those on my fucking hands that could deflect lightsaber blows

  • @blackenedwritings
    @blackenedwritings 4 года назад +2238

    End of VI
    Obi Wan Force Ghost: "Should we tell them Palpatine still lives?"
    Yoda Force Ghost: "Nah."
    Anakin Force Ghost: "lol"

    • @Arkyubus
      @Arkyubus 4 года назад +268

      Force Ghost is a light side power. The dark side users leave remnants of themselves on items, or... They're supposed to, or used to... Who fuckin knows anymore...

    • @brandond9181
      @brandond9181 4 года назад +178

      Anakin: "Are you kidding? This is where the fun begins!"

    • @ehellstrom7127
      @ehellstrom7127 4 года назад +183

      @@Arkyubus There's a simple explanation to this. Anything that comes from Disney is not Star Wars, it's Shit Wars instead. And therefore can be dumped into the toilet.

    • @Arkyubus
      @Arkyubus 4 года назад +49

      @@ehellstrom7127 Mandalorian is pretty great.
      Fallen Order is really great.
      Movies are garbo for the most part; I actually liked the Force Awakens; they could have had an interesting about a galaxy that is in a never-ending cycle of war and rebellion, and the trilogy could have explored the reason why. I wish all the things it set up weren't squandered in The Last Jedi, and then spiraled out of control in Rise of Skywalker.

    • @ehellstrom7127
      @ehellstrom7127 4 года назад +38

      @@Arkyubus I don't really care if Disney bumbled their way into decent stories. As long as they continue to call this festering pile of a trilogy canon, then as far as I am concerned it is the canon for Shit Wars which includes everything else they touched.

  • @RainbowMan9407
    @RainbowMan9407 6 месяцев назад +55

    I've never seen a movie more terrified of upsetting people.
    Ironic, isn't it?

  • @andrewadams8601
    @andrewadams8601 Год назад +85

    I love explanation that the Knights of Ren ended up being so incompetent that they just got lost on the way to TLJ lol

    • @Philip54622
      @Philip54622 Год назад +6

      Lol I had to rewind that twice it was too good

    • @All2Meme
      @All2Meme Год назад +7

      Not only did they lose their way, but they lost the script to the Sequel Trilogy that didn't suck.

  • @4ll3sb4n4n3
    @4ll3sb4n4n3 4 года назад +6281

    I hate Disney humor, it's course, rough, irritating, and it gets everywhere.

    • @lutherburgsvik6849
      @lutherburgsvik6849 4 года назад +91

      So it belongs on Tatooine then...?

    • @thesnipingseal8011
      @thesnipingseal8011 4 года назад +280

      Luther Burgsvik pretty harsh insult for tatooine. Don’t you think

    • @lutherburgsvik6849
      @lutherburgsvik6849 4 года назад +79

      @@thesnipingseal8011 yeah, I suppose so. It was just that he said *'rough, irritating, and it gets everywhere'* and that kind of sums up sand. And Tatooine is a desert planet full of sand, so I thought it was kind of amusing.

    • @luk11c4
      @luk11c4 4 года назад +7

      LMAO.

    • @de4th1snt3nough
      @de4th1snt3nough 4 года назад +15

      Are you referencing something? I cant place it... its like my mind is steering me away from it

  • @vanz681
    @vanz681 4 года назад +1741

    Anakin: *Hates sand*
    Rey: *Buries his lightsaber with sand*

    • @runningoncylinders3829
      @runningoncylinders3829 4 года назад +132

      That’s like Indiana Jones hiding his whip amongst a crowd of similar-looking snakes. He would Never!

    • @afriendlycadian9857
      @afriendlycadian9857 4 года назад +55

      @@runningoncylinders3829 just thinkong about that made me choke on my water

    • @isaac14ac
      @isaac14ac 4 года назад +50

      How dare she so disrespectful first she does that then steals they’re name! Give us more reason to hate her.

    • @SirDankleberry
      @SirDankleberry 4 года назад +80

      Anakin: *I H A T E Y O U*

    • @kneau
      @kneau 4 года назад +39

      Vanz worse yet, Rey *Ruins* his lightsaber with sand. Finely crafted things rarely remain unscathed once “introduced” to the equivalent of beach sand.

  • @MelonHead78
    @MelonHead78 2 года назад +177

    Fans: we had a deal! You promised us an epic sequel to the OT
    Disney: I am altering the deal, pray I don’t alter it any further

    • @thatoneguy-kj9nk
      @thatoneguy-kj9nk 9 месяцев назад +4

      Underrated comment

    • @curtiskretzer8898
      @curtiskretzer8898 5 месяцев назад

      🍿No.Please.
      "Alter it" further🍿

    • @lukeroberson2115
      @lukeroberson2115 3 месяца назад +1

      Fans: This deal is getting worse all the time.
      Disney: Here is a unicycle!

  • @Kevin-jb2pv
    @Kevin-jb2pv 4 месяца назад +10

    I like to imagine that Kylo was perfectly fine after he healed Rey, but then she was so attrociously bad at kissing that it killed him instantly.

  • @death-king1834
    @death-king1834 4 года назад +3324

    Remember Anakin's whole reason for turning over to evil in Revenge of the Sith was derived from his fear of losing his wife and Palpatine's promises of them learning the power to save her? But apparently the Light Side had the means of accomplishing that already. So it makes Vader's whole reason for turning bad completely pointless.

    • @arikutin1032
      @arikutin1032 4 года назад +284

      😄😄😄😆😆😆😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
      I literally never realized that before now! That's hilarious!

    • @whitworth5s248
      @whitworth5s248 4 года назад +318

      Yet completely justified because at no point did any Jedi bother to tell him that this could be done.

    • @Capri_00
      @Capri_00 4 года назад +81

      Wow, greatest point ever!!!
      But Anakin wasn’t a Gary Lou.

    • @arikutin1032
      @arikutin1032 4 года назад +389

      @@whitworth5s248 why wouldn't they? The whole point of the Light Side is healing and protection. If it existed, the Jedi would be teaching this one.

    • @themapplesperiod
      @themapplesperiod 4 года назад +83

      I loathe this movie, but to be intellectually honest you could come up with an explanation like 'Rey could only do it because it was a dark side power Sheev had but sort of in reverse. And Kylo did because of the connection between the two I guess, fuck it why not.' But then the movie would've actually had to acknowledge this and not act like it was totally normal to do that.

  • @Obi-Wan_Kenobi
    @Obi-Wan_Kenobi 4 года назад +3828

    Remember when Mark Hamill didn't like what they did to Luke and all the Last Jedi fans disrespected and ignored him? He was just the precursor. Now the entire cast can taste the disappointment Mark was forced to drown in.

    • @jedi196
      @jedi196 4 года назад +307

      Well no, true fans didn't ignore him. In fact they highlighted what he said and was backing him up the whole way. Pretty unfair that you said everyone disrespected and ignored him when it was the opposite of that with the actual fans.

    • @theflyluciano7877
      @theflyluciano7877 4 года назад +361

      @@jedi196 Hello there! My man Obi-Wan here said all The Last Jedi fans not all Star Wars fans

    • @donaldjgumpofficial5754
      @donaldjgumpofficial5754 4 года назад +85

      It's possible that the rest of the cast didn't want to jeopardise their roles in episode 9 so they waited.

    • @jedi196
      @jedi196 4 года назад +107

      @@theflyluciano7877 ah yes I see that now. Thanks for pointing it out :)

    • @theflyluciano7877
      @theflyluciano7877 4 года назад +76

      @@jedi196 It's alright, alright, alright. Misreading things happen to the best of us (meaning you a Jedi are the best of us)

  • @TGtornadoe
    @TGtornadoe Год назад +36

    Rey started on a sand planet and ended on a sand planet… theory.
    The entire trilogy was a hallucination by Rey.

    • @sijul6483
      @sijul6483 Год назад +3

      More believable than most things in the script.

    • @scienceviking4490
      @scienceviking4490 Год назад +2

      That's the best interpretation I've seen of this trilogy.

    • @dodojesus4529
      @dodojesus4529 11 месяцев назад +3

      She stayed outside a lil while to long and is currently coming down from a big case of heatstroke

  • @tigadirt
    @tigadirt Год назад +50

    I'm so embarresed that i didn't think about how ridiculous a quick sand ceiling would be until he pointed it out.

  • @lukefrederiks5906
    @lukefrederiks5906 4 года назад +2536

    “Commander Mauler. The time has come.”
    “Execute Order: Unbridled Rage”

  • @TheArcher143
    @TheArcher143 4 года назад +2391

    The next movie better start with Luke waking up and realising these last 3 movies have just been a bad dream.

    • @marekkralik8290
      @marekkralik8290 4 года назад +82

      Hah,brilliant!That will make more sense then wholw sequel trifuckinglogy

    • @-cams.
      @-cams. 4 года назад +123

      and he just woke up from partying too hard with his friends after Episode VI lol

    • @sadnessofwildgoats
      @sadnessofwildgoats 4 года назад +11

      I heard a rumor from a reliable source that the prequel trilogy will be erased from the in universe timeline.

    • @MrMah-zf6jk
      @MrMah-zf6jk 4 года назад +31

      @@sadnessofwildgoats uh huh sure.

    • @kierrakim4761
      @kierrakim4761 4 года назад +13

      Then he goes and tries to kill Ben who is sleeping in his Jedi School, starting the cycle over again

  • @spartan5713
    @spartan5713 10 месяцев назад +89

    Welcome to Disney Star Wars, where:
    -Being run through by a lightsaber doesn’t kill you
    -Being thrown down a shaft, your body exploding, and then your body being further destroyed with the Death Star exploding doesn’t kill you…(side note, thing still looked in pretty good shape after being blown into a million pieces in Jedi)
    -Being sucked out into the vacuum of space doesn’t kill you.
    -Being shot by Chewie’s blaster and sliced across the head doesn’t kill you.
    -But a simple force projection kills the greatest Jedi through exhaustion.🙄

    • @jacobmonks3722
      @jacobmonks3722 8 месяцев назад

      Being sucked into space kills you, but you can survive for a short time, assuming you don't implode from the lack of pressure (some advice, exhale everything if you ever have to be in a vacuum). Leia being a Jedi is an easy justification for her lasting longer. Also remember she was hospitalized and out of commission almost the whole rest of the movie, so it still had huge consequences. She didn't just move past it; she barely survived.
      Luke's projection is the single most intense usage of the Force we've seen in any of the movies. In Episode 5, Luke struggled with basic telekinesis, and in Episode 6, presumably after years of practice and honing his skills, he still couldn't fully control all his thoughts and emotions when it mattered most. There are always going to be feats that are difficult even for trained Jedi, and Force Projection just happened to be too much for Luke's old and out-of-practice body.
      I have no defense for the other ones, though. Palpatine should have stayed dead, and Kylo Ren, in general, is mishandled in the last movie.

  • @Ascerious
    @Ascerious 6 месяцев назад +19

    Han, Leia and Luke were the fortunate ones. Think about Chewbacca, who lost his year-long friends and is now stuck with Rey

  • @TheMedievalNerd
    @TheMedievalNerd 4 года назад +2313

    "What's your name?"
    "Rey."
    "Rey who?"
    Rey looks around.
    "Rey Star Wars"
    Rey winks to the camera.
    DIRECTED BY JJ ABRAMS

    • @Spaceman2921
      @Spaceman2921 4 года назад +107

      This was the point where I stood up and applauded in the cinema.

    • @T--kq3pj
      @T--kq3pj 4 года назад +71

      Who even asks question like that. Rey who? Who talks like that?!

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 4 года назад +35

      @@T--kq3pj James Bond. Rey is new 007.

    • @gokakarotku
      @gokakarotku 4 года назад

      Nice job stealing jokes 👍

    • @marscld252
      @marscld252 4 года назад +21

      Hahaha! I would've added two points for the movie if that had happened, upping it to a 3/10. Still better than TLJ and TFA's -7 and -2.

  • @SiddharthShenoy
    @SiddharthShenoy 3 года назад +2292

    “Hi, I’m Peter Parker”... “Rey Skywalker”... “Oh we’re using our made up names? I’m Spider-Man then”

    • @suffering-everyday
      @suffering-everyday 3 года назад +89

      she buried your lightsaber in the sand next to your mom

    • @claws811
      @claws811 3 года назад +10

      @@suffering-everyday yeah

    • @vakentine8173
      @vakentine8173 3 года назад +9

      Wow this is amazing...
      Hope you have a good day!

    • @jamesteller7791
      @jamesteller7791 3 года назад +3

      It's OK ani

    • @davidripley2916
      @davidripley2916 3 года назад +4

      My made-up name is Awesome Bastard!
      * Disclaimer
      - Not really, it's Awesome
      (The bit I made up)

  • @AliceBowie
    @AliceBowie Год назад +82

    Let's just assume that Palpatine took over Rey's body, and just played it cool and didn't tell anyone. Then he buries the lighsabers as an intentional insult, and says his name is skywalker to gloat, knowing he's gonna do bad stuff in their name.

    • @dodojesus4529
      @dodojesus4529 11 месяцев назад +8

      Probably play the long game, train "jedi" gain ever more control inside the new republic. Remember time is no longer a factor since palps can just posses another young body.
      Sheev dominatus

    • @Mothbean
      @Mothbean 9 месяцев назад +4

      Go for Papa Palpatine!

    • @thathandsomedevil0828
      @thathandsomedevil0828 8 месяцев назад +4

      Don't write the story for incompetent writers, it is pure garbage.

    • @StarWarsomania
      @StarWarsomania 6 месяцев назад +2

      I actually had an idea for a fanfic based on this premise. It would be told through the POV of a character who’d recognized him in Rey, but Palpatine had backed him into a political corner where absolutely nobody believed him, and he could do nothing but panic from the middle distance.
      A dystopian story would just sort of leave that as an ambiguous/open ending.
      A more hopeful story would have the POV character find a way around his machinations, and have the only other character who knew (Rey, trapped inside her body like a Goa’uld host) help him expunge the “Sith soul” from her body.
      My muse is unfortunately wandering the back hills of nowhere, and she only shows up to throw good prompts at my face to just run away again.

    • @aronthedev3074
      @aronthedev3074 5 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@StarWarsomaniathat would be a way more interesting story than anything Disney is capable of atm. Palpatine would use Rey just as he did his political power in the prequels, putting pieces in place that will benefit him later but under the guise of doing it for the "good of the galaxy." Everyone sees Rey as the ultimate hero and so never really questions what she's doing, except for this one person who knows the truth and desperately tries to get people to see what they see.
      I really like that idea!

  • @montyboon4127
    @montyboon4127 2 года назад +100

    What really pisses me off about force heal is how much it breaks the canon. Every single death could be summed up with "but they could have forced healed them". I was watching clone wars with my mum who doesnt watch much extended universe star wars and satine got game ended, my mum said the best thing ever "why didnt obi wan just yknow, do the force thing that revives everyone" and i was like "spot on, if its a thing, why not do it?"

    • @spartanonxy
      @spartanonxy Год назад +22

      In old EU force heal was a thing but came pretty much in two forms. One was a form of first aid. It was not able to fix severe wounds. And was a rare power. The second made people heal faster and was common but at best it turned 3 weeks to heal to 1 week to heal. There was only ONE exception that the EU went out of its way to portray as well exactly that a exception. Even by Jedi and Sith it was treated as a outlier bordering on full blown miracle.
      Yes healing can be done with the force in old EU but it was bound in rules. This is the biggest problem with the force in the sequel trilogy. It is not bound in any rules or guidelines. It is just plot contrived nonsense.

    • @donovandelozier7156
      @donovandelozier7156 9 месяцев назад +2

      "Force thing that revives everyone" because to revive someone you need to trade all your own life force.

  • @cazabrow1967
    @cazabrow1967 4 года назад +1101

    "Who are you?"
    "Rey"
    "Rey who?"
    "Reypublic Senate"
    Force ghost Mace Windu: "not yet."

    • @cha02psc
      @cha02psc 4 года назад +73

      Cazabrow so... it’s t-Rey-son then?

    • @purpleemerald5299
      @purpleemerald5299 4 года назад +27

      Pedagogue Squinting *”RRRRREEEEEYYYYY!!!!!”*

    • @tekakiuluy3221
      @tekakiuluy3221 4 года назад +5

      I see you're one of the padawans in r/prequelmemes aswell

    • @thecheesefactor
      @thecheesefactor 4 года назад +3

      “Sweet Princess, if through this wicked witch’s trick, a spindle should your finger prick. A ray of hope there still may be in this, the gift I give to thee.”
      “And from this slumber you shall wake, when true love’s kiss, the spell shall break.”

    • @cazabrow1967
      @cazabrow1967 4 года назад

      @@tekakiuluy3221 Shit, he knows..

  • @YeTism
    @YeTism 2 года назад +373

    George Lucas is a flawed genius. His writing wasn’t always great, but who cares. He knew how to build a fantastic world and captivate an audience. No one else can make a Star Wars movie

    • @berliner0
      @berliner0 Год назад +2

      Too right

    • @Klespyrian
      @Klespyrian Год назад +19

      I'd watch a Peter Jackson Star Wars movie

    • @YunethAlwis
      @YunethAlwis Год назад

      wait, isn't his writing great, just not the execution?

    • @papryk3102
      @papryk3102 Год назад +18

      There are many talented and proven writers and directors who could make films set in this universe which would tell meaningful stories respectful of the lore and the world of Star Wars. It's just that such people don't get hired by Disney and they never will because they would not cooperate in writing and directing their films with a corporate AI that makes idiotic decisions based on what will lead to 0.1% more sales in tickets and merch.

    • @YeTism
      @YeTism Год назад +11

      @@papryk3102 I’d watch a Denis Villeneuve star wars movie

  • @DirtyDozen6612
    @DirtyDozen6612 2 года назад +60

    Palpatine firing lighting at Rey whilst his face is getting melted made me laugh out loud in the cinema

    • @JadenMoon1475
      @JadenMoon1475 3 месяца назад

      But.... why though?!?!? *_MACE WINDU DID THE EXACT SAME TO HIM IN REVENGE OF THE SITH!!!!!_*

    • @lorenzobarbato4558
      @lorenzobarbato4558 Месяц назад

      ​@@JadenMoon1475 In Revenge of the Sith it's clear Palpatine does it to show Anakin that, if he stopped using the lightning, Windu would have struck him down with the lightsaber and to force Anakin to react, since he wes becoming too weak for that reason. I could elaborate more if needed

  • @Aerolian
    @Aerolian 4 года назад +883

    Anakin: "I don't like sand - it's coarse and irritating and it gets everywhere."
    Rey: LOL *Proceeds to bury his Lightsaber in the same planet that he was enslaved in and the same planet that he expressed his utter disgust for its coarse sand.
    Continuity at its finest.

    • @cb_norwood
      @cb_norwood 4 года назад +148

      Well after all the sequel saga is about the ultimate all-encompassing defeat of the Skywalkers at the hands of the Palpatines.

    • @shawklan27
      @shawklan27 4 года назад +34

      Don't you remember guys?! The prequels aren't canon in the sequel trilogy!

    • @busterbladex
      @busterbladex 4 года назад +85

      You can actually say the same for Luke Skywalker. He literally wanted nothing more than to leave Tantoinne and be somewhere else.... hell, you can say the same for Leia because she was never born or even know the planet...

    • @steevrawjers
      @steevrawjers 4 года назад +1

      Flash Out lol more like contempt

    • @steevrawjers
      @steevrawjers 4 года назад

      CB Norwood true that's for sure

  • @gayflower900
    @gayflower900 3 года назад +2773

    Finn has the best and most consistent character arc in the whole trilogy
    Episode 7: “REY”
    Episode 8: “REEYYYY”
    Episode 9: “REEEEEYYYYYY”

    • @tengkuhafiz4174
      @tengkuhafiz4174 3 года назад +216

      As the Y in Rey got longer, he’ll eventually end up shouting Reyyyyyyyyyy’d Shadow legends

    • @sweetyeetus
      @sweetyeetus 3 года назад +26

      This comment is criminally underrated. XD

    • @haillobster7154
      @haillobster7154 3 года назад +13

      Best black character in film!

    • @Sockren
      @Sockren 2 года назад +1

      @@olskoolkool3342why you gotta get so political on us bro

    • @olskoolkool3342
      @olskoolkool3342 2 года назад +8

      @@Sockren Dude! My bad - I often listen to Mauler in bed, and must have rolled on my phone and dropped all those emojis 🤣 Your comment is the only reason I realized 😜

  • @ibtgb2
    @ibtgb2 2 года назад +21

    I’m wondering why one of the “resistance” fighters decided “hey, we’re launching an assault on the emperor and the entire first order’s thousand ship army, should I bring the horses?”

  • @ciarangrainger2465
    @ciarangrainger2465 Год назад +43

    What was your reaction to the ending of TRoS?
    Daisy Ridley: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 😬
    John Boyega: 😑
    Oscar Isaac: *Silently raging*
    Ian McDiarmid: Da fuk was that???
    Kelly Marie Tran: 😱
    Naomi Ackie: Keep it together 😭
    J.J. Abrams: 🥺 why you not like muh movie?

  • @Luccaluke
    @Luccaluke 4 года назад +599

    It has been stated a million times and it shall be stated a million times more:
    The expanded universe died for this!

    • @IRMentat
      @IRMentat 4 года назад +29

      Luccaluke
      More like. Star Wars:Disney is dead, long live Star Wars:EU! (Not EA, EU)

    • @Liberator130
      @Liberator130 4 года назад +14

      @HorizonEngine05 Fallen Order is probably one of the best written stories out of the new Star Wars continuity, and it still has massive problems in regards to the writing, including character motivations and plot holes.

    • @kaptainkabul9499
      @kaptainkabul9499 4 года назад +21

      Thrawn triology is my canon ending. Not caring one bit for Disney.

    • @Liberator130
      @Liberator130 4 года назад +3

      ​@HorizonEngine05 ​ Gotcha. I feel mixed on the mechanics of the game. Mostly, I think Upper Echelon Gaming had a great assessment on the game.

    • @paulnaughton9923
      @paulnaughton9923 4 года назад +7

      EU Fans: Legends never die.

  • @papaofthejohns5882
    @papaofthejohns5882 4 года назад +3949

    “I’m Peter by the way”
    “Rey Skywalker”
    “Oh, we’re using our made up names? I’m Spiderman then.”
    Was the perfect conclusion to this rant 😂

    • @aidanmattys7488
      @aidanmattys7488 4 года назад +143

      Loved it so goddamn much. That edit was more satisfying than the end of the entire "skywalker saga"

    • @dongxx
      @dongxx 4 года назад +59

      Actually she's Rey mclunky

    • @wopjohn
      @wopjohn 4 года назад +23

      Rey Jettster

    • @aidanmattys7488
      @aidanmattys7488 4 года назад +19

      Rey Jebwalker

    • @Rishi123456789
      @Rishi123456789 4 года назад +22

      Rey Shitwalker.

  • @chrisandrew7577
    @chrisandrew7577 Год назад +24

    "Here's a mcmuffin"
    Genuinely made me laugh my ass off

  • @afinch93
    @afinch93 4 года назад +1591

    Having palpatine back completely undermines Anakins sacrifice.

    • @AAron-jj7zx
      @AAron-jj7zx 4 года назад +146

      And Luke didn't bring balance to the force.

    • @ViceArancibia
      @ViceArancibia 4 года назад +75

      @@AAron-jj7zx but a nobody did. Sorry Sheev's granddaughter

    • @bavarianpotato
      @bavarianpotato 4 года назад +53

      @@AAron-jj7zx well luke was never really supposed to, anakin is and was the chosen one.

    • @kingmaoh5566
      @kingmaoh5566 4 года назад +72

      @@bavarianpotato Technically Anakian's sacrifice was supposed to bring balance to the force

    • @MajinMist603
      @MajinMist603 4 года назад +14

      ​@@bavarianpotato Luke was suppose to bring a new order that uses both light and dark ( they don't see it like that because the force is the force there is no bad and good sides it just how you use it) .

  • @DS-mo1xf
    @DS-mo1xf 4 года назад +721

    She took their life.
    She took their weapons.
    She took Leia's son.
    She took their victory.
    What more could she take?
    Might as well take their name.

    • @Straker9063
      @Straker9063 4 года назад +79

      And Po's robot

    • @stlchucko
      @stlchucko 4 года назад +66

      And their moisture farm

    • @DanceySteveYNWA
      @DanceySteveYNWA 4 года назад +66

      And Lukes xwing

    • @danielburks2257
      @danielburks2257 4 года назад +69

      She also buried their lightsabers on the planet that was painful for them. Let me list some things that happened there.
      1. Anakin was a slave
      2. Qui-Gon died there
      3. Anakin's Mom died there
      4. Anakin killed not just the men but the women and the children
      5. Luke's "uncle" died there
      6. They had to rescue Han
      7. Leia was a slave

    • @ProfessorFanatic
      @ProfessorFanatic 4 года назад +42

      To Daniel Burks: Qui-Gon died on Naboo, but I see what you mean. More bad things than good are associated with Tatooine in terms of the movies.

  • @tcook6759
    @tcook6759 9 месяцев назад +22

    I love this rant. Nobody can rip on a bad movie like Mauler can. Excellent video.

  • @shermanballz
    @shermanballz Год назад +14

    Even without the explosion: Leia and Luke are old as hell, and Palatine was already old when their dad was a little boy.
    What is he, like 120?

    • @StarWarsomania
      @StarWarsomania 6 месяцев назад +5

      Assuming he was at least 50 at TPM.
      That makes him about 60 in AotC.
      And let’s round up and say 65 in RotS.
      Luke and Leia are a little less than 20 in ANH, so he’d be in his early to mid 80s. Let’s say 85.
      TFA takes place 30 years after the Battle of Yavin. So, yeah, he’d be 115.
      Turns out his birthdate is 84 BBY, so yeah. 30 years plus one year between TLJ and TROS is 115 years young baby.

    • @glauberglousger956
      @glauberglousger956 12 дней назад

      I mean... There's nothing that says the Dark Side prevents you from going senile, add that to being in a broken body unable to handle his power, and I think Sheev lost a few brain cells
      Or maybe it's all due to him being old

  • @skeletorrobo
    @skeletorrobo 3 года назад +1590

    Disney Original Starwars treatment.
    Han: Stabbed
    Luke: Vaporised
    Leia: Shamed to death
    Vader: sacrifice meaningless.
    Chewie: blanked by Leia.
    Lando: robots
    M.Falcon: hacked by L3-37
    C3P0: 'friends' can't stand him
    R2D2: replaced by a ball.
    Adml. Ackbar: blown up
    Palpatine: wins

    • @jackbrown2838
      @jackbrown2838 3 года назад +21

      Yes

    • @mundogameplay1341
      @mundogameplay1341 3 года назад +32

      Vader’s sacrifice isn’t meaningless, he saved is son, “killed the emperor, redeemed himself, and if that wasn’t enough...
      He destroyed the Imperial Leadership by killing the Emperor
      Although I like Dark Empire over ROS
      Having said that, Indeed, Disney screwed the Sequels...badly...very badly

    • @calt7964
      @calt7964 3 года назад +167

      @@mundogameplay1341 Vader’s sacrifice has been dampened, and made worthless by this movie because the emperor wasn’t killed and his son still died trying to dismantle the empire they believed had been destroyed when they originally “killed the emperor.” His sacrifice meant accomplished nothing in the grand scheme of things.
      TL;DR The empire lives on as the first order, his son still dies to the empire he tried to destroy, and the emperor wasn’t actually killed by Vader. So his sacrifice has a lost a lot of its previous weight and meaning.

    • @calt7964
      @calt7964 3 года назад +14

      Though I do agree it isn’t entirely meaningless. He saved his son in the moment, I just believe that his sacrifice has lost a lot of meaning.

    • @mundogameplay1341
      @mundogameplay1341 3 года назад +4

      @@calt7964 If you said it like that, yeah, at least in canon his sacrifice has lost a lot of meaning!!!

  • @TheCrazyHedgehogLady
    @TheCrazyHedgehogLady 4 года назад +724

    Palpatine's explanation for still being alive was essentially "Something something DARK SIDE." D:

  • @joeker5208
    @joeker5208 8 месяцев назад +20

    This is one of the greatest films of all time. I have never seen a film so desperate, so pathetic, spiteful, and ashamed of it’s mediocrity in my life. I can not watch this movie without laughing my ass off. 14/10, wouldn’t watch again

  • @JonAleksanderKrancan
    @JonAleksanderKrancan Год назад +14

    2022 and still watching this now. Thanks Mauler.

  • @KenMabie
    @KenMabie 3 года назад +1541

    "everyone just dies and comes back in this film"
    yeah except Luke, Han and Leia you know .. the characters people actually like

    • @tymgames8307
      @tymgames8307 3 года назад +13

      Oh wait. I realised this at this second and then I see your comment xD. But that's so true

    • @KenMabie
      @KenMabie 3 года назад +8

      @@tymgames8307 Troof

    • @Jay9966
      @Jay9966 3 года назад +16

      It's probably because they are actually dead in real life or because their patience for the fucking fail reboot was spent.

    • @_Aemse
      @_Aemse 3 года назад +1

      thats for episode 10 downfall of the landflyers which totally flips all tropes on their heads

    • @Greg-yu4ij
      @Greg-yu4ij 3 года назад +1

      Thank God I watched this and not that JJ turd fest.

  • @aryaadityapurbadi5527
    @aryaadityapurbadi5527 4 года назад +1975

    MauLer uploads Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker: An Unbridled Rage
    Everyone: "Loooong have I waited...."

    • @luhedi6303
      @luhedi6303 4 года назад +6

      Arya Aditya Purbadi I literally posted that and then I saw this comment. Lol

    • @jmuk3571
      @jmuk3571 4 года назад +11

      I’ve been looking forward to this for a year. Can’t wait for the 3 part review like he did with TLJ

    • @willsono408
      @willsono408 4 года назад +5

      Long-man BAD!!!!!

    • @goldenstatewarriors9418
      @goldenstatewarriors9418 4 года назад +9

      Long have I waited ... for it to come out on DVD so mauler can do his huge 3-part review and we can all enjoy it more than the film.

    • @KneelB4Bacon
      @KneelB4Bacon 4 года назад +3

      "This will be a day long-remembered."

  • @vincents1087
    @vincents1087 10 месяцев назад +11

    “I want to move away from that stupid to talk about a different stupid” 😅

  • @dababyman8039
    @dababyman8039 2 года назад +41

    It’s hilarious how rey can deflect the most powerful lightning ever seen in Star Wars with ONE HAND after being significantly weakened whereas mace windu struggles vs a weaker force lightning using both this hands and not having all his life sucked out of him by a wrinkly old freak

    • @user-bb1ti6ct7s
      @user-bb1ti6ct7s Месяц назад

      Exactly my guy destroyed thousands of ships a few sec before, but then cant even kill a girl from which he basically took most of her soul. Disney logic is so good🤡

  • @Onirium
    @Onirium 3 года назад +1408

    Disney is going to make a sequel to The Lord of the Rings. Sauron is back because he had made a copy of the ring, so he was dead, but not really. Do you remember Gandalf? The wizard that returned from the dead to keep fighting? He is hidden because he's scared and traumatised. The main character is a female hobbit who never left the Shire, but she kicks ass with every possible weapon with absolutely no training. She can even turn invisible at will. When she brings Gandalf his lost staff, the wizard throws it away because the concept of good and evil in the original trilogy is too simple and people have to grow up. I think it's going to be a great success!!

    • @Ealsante
      @Ealsante 3 года назад +124

      Well, here's a million dollars, which I will set on fire. *Sets on fire*
      Now here's 300 million dollars, shut up and go make a movie with it, go!

    • @camcraft5196
      @camcraft5196 3 года назад +69

      Wow good job describing the sequel trilogy

    • @CallanElliott
      @CallanElliott 3 года назад +15

      Gandalf left Middle-Earth at the end of LotR anyway because his work there was done. His duty was already complete.

    • @Onirium
      @Onirium 3 года назад +44

      @@CallanElliott you are right, I also love the LoTR, my story is ridiculous on purpose. But just for fun, maybe it could happen in the years after Sauron is defeated and before Gandalf leaves Middle Earth?

    • @Onirium
      @Onirium 3 года назад +9

      @@keyboardkaos3279 I hope you are wrong, I'm so hyped about that series...

  • @agentcarter2219
    @agentcarter2219 4 года назад +620

    Disney Star Wars Sequel Trilogy: The single most squandered opportunity in the history of cinema

    • @jaredt5127
      @jaredt5127 4 года назад +24

      congrats kathy, you did it.

    • @Micoryourboss
      @Micoryourboss 4 года назад +12

      Honestly there was no opportunity there. They should have left Star Wars as it was. The ending in Return of the Jedi is pretty final and does not leave much open

    • @adas2051
      @adas2051 4 года назад +37

      Michael van Moolenbroek you can still have some sort of continuation without repeating ANH. Look at the EU.

    • @HardReset_YT
      @HardReset_YT 4 года назад +10

      The star wars universe is large and lengthy. The biggest mistake was using a time period so close to the OT heroes.
      While these films are bad for what they did to the lore and all that, the OT character assassinations are possibly the most egregious sins of the sequels.

    • @Teppest33
      @Teppest33 4 года назад +7

      Remember, Iger and Kennedy had a sequel trilogy treatment/outline that they got from George Lucas, which they discarded in favor of this unoriginal cash grab. They had everything in their hands and it’s now turning into a sinking ship.

  • @JanniTV
    @JanniTV Год назад +17

    Sheevino Palpationo was the Leader of Both Clone wars sides, led an Empire, killed the Jedi Order yet this Film Portraits him as a Dumb person. Magnificent

  • @jpanduezadlf
    @jpanduezadlf Год назад +10

    In TLJ Luke didn't read the "Sacred Jedi Texts", in TROS Luke wrote them.

    • @All2Meme
      @All2Meme Год назад +3

      Maybe Luke was smoking some of Yoda's "Dagobah Green" at the time and forgot what he wrote?

  • @drewwagner5227
    @drewwagner5227 3 года назад +1535

    “I killed a guy who had a military ID and now every military base lets me in no questions asked” - ROS writers

    • @doubleyellows6742
      @doubleyellows6742 3 года назад +69

      As if with this level of technology they would rely on a literal ID card for that kind of thing anyway. Even in ROTJ they used access codes, not actual ID cards.

    • @logicaldude3611
      @logicaldude3611 3 года назад +73

      @@doubleyellows6742 "It's one of the codes that lets people go wherever they want sir, so it checks out."

    • @doubleyellows6742
      @doubleyellows6742 3 года назад +5

      @@logicaldude3611 😂

    • @Kevin-jb2pv
      @Kevin-jb2pv 3 года назад +19

      This is why I regularly attack servicemen.

    • @thebystander1636
      @thebystander1636 3 года назад +7

      To be fair, while I was enlisted, this was actually a thing. Except it was your car. Had you stole an enlisted guys car you could have gotten on any US Marine Corps base in the states. You got a little red/blue sticker that went on your windshield, and as long as you didn't have hippie hair, they just waved you on through the gates as long as you had that sticker. Terrorist with bombs or not, ohhh well!

  • @edwardwindsor2516
    @edwardwindsor2516 4 года назад +1615

    "They can't activate shields in atmosphere"
    Droidekas: Allow us to introduce ourselves

    • @Yhur4x
      @Yhur4x 4 года назад +170

      Even the gungans hat deflecting handheld shields in phantom menace ffs

    • @matthewmuir8884
      @matthewmuir8884 4 года назад +96

      If it had been something about that atmosphere specifically, it might have made more sense. But even then, we know its possible to build a shield around a planet from Rogue One.

    • @asandax6
      @asandax6 4 года назад +105

      The second deathstar was protected by a shield projected from the planets Surface. I believe JJ thought Star Wars and Star Trek are the same thing.

    • @rollewestbom
      @rollewestbom 4 года назад +19

      Yhur4x grey even had the gigantic shield that enclosed the whole army

    • @Meanpooh
      @Meanpooh 4 года назад +6

      I was thinking that the whole time.

  • @Mick-hp4yg
    @Mick-hp4yg Год назад +15

    I love Anthony Daniels at the beginning. He made such a WTF face and didn't even care that JJ was right there 😂

  • @Suitsnstylesguy
    @Suitsnstylesguy Год назад +16

    The clip in the beginning was so freaking funny
    I had never seen that but the fact the actors were like that is freaking hilarious

  • @unlimitedninja3635
    @unlimitedninja3635 4 года назад +763

    I would've much preferred if Kylo survived and Rey died for an ending that made more sense.
    "who are you?"
    "Ben."
    "Ben who?"
    "Ben Skywalker."

    • @laalaag2auntyayag776
      @laalaag2auntyayag776 4 года назад +91

      That would have been awesome. Wouldn’t it be Solo though? Idk, I think I’d surely use the Skywalker name too just for the clout

    • @exquizzetmtg2779
      @exquizzetmtg2779 4 года назад +59

      @@laalaag2auntyayag776 kylo is blatantly based on Jacen Solo (who had a twin sister named Jaina) and Benjamin Skywalker, Jacen's apprentice from Legends, seen in the Legacy of the Force series of novels

    • @MobiusLeader007
      @MobiusLeader007 4 года назад +130

      That would have given weight to the "Rise of Skywalker" title. Instead of having every Skywalker dead and a Palpatine stealing their name.

    • @bkers10
      @bkers10 4 года назад +46

      ​@@laalaag2auntyayag776 If Ben did survive he would probably have to go on the run, otherwise he would be called to pay for the crimes he committed with the First Order. Changing his name from Solo to Skywalker may have helped him remain undercover while also symbolizing his return to the ways of a Jedi.
      It's still a tad flimsy, but I would have liked that a lot more than "Rey Skywalker." BARF!

    • @darkmistico
      @darkmistico 4 года назад +24

      omg yes .. and would fit perfectly with the title of the movie.. ¨The rise of skywalker¨ who is rising if all the skywalkers are dead as f

  • @marcusa.ragnos1041
    @marcusa.ragnos1041 4 года назад +853

    Rey’s Christmas list to Disney:
    “Dear Disney, please steal for me...
    -Anakin/Luke’s lightsaber
    -Anakin/Luke’s last name
    -Anakin’s chosen one status
    -More power than Anakin or either of Anakin’s kids
    -Better piloting abilities than Anakin/Luke
    -Better engineering abilities than Anakin/Luke
    -Poe’s droid
    -Luke’s film score moment on Tatooine
    But please make sure I don’t challenge Leia in leadership capabilities or show me clearly being more powerful than Leia or doing things we know she can’t do. That would just be over the top.
    -Sincerely,
    The New Chosen One”

    • @AkulaSpawn
      @AkulaSpawn 4 года назад +48

      Don't forget she now owns Chewbaca's Falcon.

    • @marcusa.ragnos1041
      @marcusa.ragnos1041 4 года назад +3

      Dang forgot a few 😂

    • @mobbs6426
      @mobbs6426 4 года назад +6

      The Force Un-wha.?
      And who's this Pussy Starkiller everyone was talking about a few years ago

    • @parkeypence5974
      @parkeypence5974 4 года назад +14

      Don't forget Anakin's X-Wing

    • @pyramidion5911
      @pyramidion5911 4 года назад +2

      @@parkeypence5974 your joking right

  • @PickledShark
    @PickledShark 6 месяцев назад +8

    “If anything, you could skip the OT because it’s largely irrelevant compared to the larger narrative of Rey vs Palpatine”
    That’s easily the most damning condemnation of the sequels that I’ve heard. Absolutely true though

  • @thekeegster6278
    @thekeegster6278 5 месяцев назад +9

    Despite the flaws of the prequels, the story and writing is immaculate. Having a hopeful young hero turned into a manipulated tragic figure by a villain that wins not because of brute force (heh), but through years of meticulous planning is perfect. Anakin’s main drive was to save the ones he loved from dying, and Palpatine knew this, and Palpatine was able to effortlessly manipulate Anakin to the dark side through years of neglect and betrayal from the Jedi Order. We hardly see writing like this in movies nowadays and I think this is what makes Star Wars so special.
    The sequels are made by a bunch of five year olds smashing action figures together and written as such. I’m more than fine with putting episodes 7-9 into the rivers of Mustafar where it belongs and never acknowledging that it’s canon.

    • @tyrannozilla
      @tyrannozilla 5 месяцев назад +4

      Prequels > Disney

    • @toothgrinder2760
      @toothgrinder2760 4 месяца назад +4

      “The sequels are made by a bunch of 5 year olds smashing action figures together and written as such.”
      “The sequels are made by a bunch of 5 year olds smashing action figures together and written as such ^whom Ioathe George Lucas, and wanted to destroy his legacy.”

    • @billjacobs521
      @billjacobs521 2 месяца назад

      Well, you can't say the writing was "immaculate" when the dialogue was so often shit. But yes, the prequels do have alot of good to them, they are just flawed--the sequels are pretty much constructed of flaws.

    • @jez76
      @jez76 2 месяца назад +1

      The prequels could’ve been so much better had George left the directors chair to someone else. Someone who could’ve pointed out weak points and challenged some decisions.
      But the main story of Anakins fall and Palpatines rise is fantastic.

    • @Pimploaf_YTP
      @Pimploaf_YTP 20 дней назад

      The writing in the prequels is terrible but I prefer it to bland corporate floundering

  • @gankgoat8334
    @gankgoat8334 4 года назад +572

    I remember fondly now when Jar Jar was considered the worst thing to happen to star wars, we were so naive back then.

    • @557deadpool
      @557deadpool 4 года назад +51

      @@revolverswitch Jar Jar was not that bad

    • @WolfLykaios
      @WolfLykaios 4 года назад +9

      Naive indeed
      I feel so stupid

    • @jorgeloredo100
      @jorgeloredo100 4 года назад +39

      Jar Jar was supossed to be Darth Plagueis, George was going to make an amazing turn till the fans bitched him in to a corner. At least that man had a plan...

    • @VileVamp
      @VileVamp 4 года назад +3

      I hated Anakin more than Jar Jar in that movie, even as a kid.
      Also, guy above me is totally reaching.

    • @The-Secret-Door
      @The-Secret-Door 4 года назад +13

      That confused me for a second; when I read "Jar Jar" now, I automatically think of Abrams!

  • @Milkra
    @Milkra 4 года назад +865

    Fun fact: the transmission palpatine sent through the galaxy offscreen can be heard in the Fortnite Star Wars tie in event. That’s right, Fortnite is now canonically relevant to the full Star Wars story.

    • @tadpolegaming4510
      @tadpolegaming4510 4 года назад +231

      Jesus Christ

    • @georgelea4297
      @georgelea4297 4 года назад +65

      Oh what joy

    • @matteolucchi1205
      @matteolucchi1205 4 года назад +116

      😂(😥)🔫

    • @MLPDethDealr32
      @MLPDethDealr32 4 года назад +10

      Wasnt that also a plot point in the 2015 Battlefront game as well?

    • @thinkwithurdipstick
      @thinkwithurdipstick 4 года назад +117

      Y’all remember when video games were based on the movies, not crucial parts of them? I member.

  • @deepbasu9619
    @deepbasu9619 Год назад +11

    Ok, note on the star destroyers rising. Why in hell did it not cause a massive Exogulquake, each one is meant to be assembled in space (if I remember correctly, the Kuat Drive Yards makes them in space), and the whole area that Kylo and all of Palpatines followers would immediately be hit by a magnitude 10 quake, they would be decimated and covered in rubble

  • @beowulfcole4173
    @beowulfcole4173 2 года назад +50

    I might've missed something here, but isn't the falcon on pasana? They leave in ochi's ship, and then lando has it at the end. So how the hell do they get it back to rescue Rey from the star destroyer? Do they teleport that through the force too?

    • @callumpears1523
      @callumpears1523 2 года назад +16

      Oh shit that's a good point. They just suddenly have the Falcon on Kijimi and then use it to get to the Endor Moon despite leaving it with Lando and going to Kijimi in Ochi's ship.

    • @StarWarsomania
      @StarWarsomania 6 месяцев назад +1

      If I were writing answers for the shit writers, i would say that the First Order had already impounded it when they took Chewie prisoner. The Stormtroopers originally saw them at the party at Pasana, so they could have easily found the Falcon and taken it onto their Destroyer to look for clues about the Resistance or their base, particularly since they had already lost track of the crew.
      This also explains why Hux knows where it is - he already signed off on paperwork to have it impounded and searched, but since he’s a spy and wants the Resistance to stop Kylo, he’s been delaying anybody tearing it apart as long as he can get away with it.
      If I was explaining things for the writers, this is what I would say.
      But since I’m not ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ dunno magic teleporting ship.

  • @gganbp
    @gganbp 4 года назад +616

    Luke wakes up in the little tree house on Endor after the party with the Ewoks last night.
    "Now that was a very weird dream", he says. And then this movie ends.

    • @theorionproject6172
      @theorionproject6172 4 года назад +62

      A heavy night on the blue milk.

    • @nathaniel04
      @nathaniel04 4 года назад +31

      One too many death sticks for Luke!

    • @pantognost
      @pantognost 4 года назад +16

      Pedro :P ok. From now on this is what happened as far as I’m concerned. Thanks for the solution mate.

    • @gganbp
      @gganbp 4 года назад +6

      @@pantognost I'm not the first one to think of this, I saw it in another video. I don't remember which one, tho

    • @adamfrisk956
      @adamfrisk956 4 года назад +4

      @@lillostmiracle568 And rethink your life

  • @hillerm
    @hillerm 4 года назад +758

    The whole Disney Star Wars trilogy is just fan fiction to me.

    • @lite4998
      @lite4998 4 года назад +45

      Michael Hey. Not all fanfiction is this bad. Some of it is decent.

    • @davemac9563
      @davemac9563 4 года назад +30

      Michael written by someone who has no knowledge of fiction writing.....who was also drunk.....AND WHO KNEW NOTHING ABOUT STAR WARS

    • @0x777
      @0x777 4 года назад +9

      It feels a lot like a story you'd find in a computer game. Or maybe a tabletop RPG. Where the GM doesn't know what the characters are going to do, so he has to keep his options open and (ab)use the Force as the deus ex machina when the characters fuck up royally and there is no other way to keep the story going except to make the omnipotent magic rescue them.

    • @wxedsanddokx
      @wxedsanddokx 4 года назад

      Same

    • @TheDukeOfPannekoeken
      @TheDukeOfPannekoeken 4 года назад +1

      Amen

  • @Buckethat_Trey
    @Buckethat_Trey 5 месяцев назад +11

    I miss the MauLer rage

  • @JelloTypeR
    @JelloTypeR 2 месяца назад +4

    There’s no Snoke without fire. That’s why he’s immersed in water.

  • @devastator06
    @devastator06 4 года назад +1912

    finally a worse love story than twilight

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 года назад +82

      I thought that was "Fifty Shades of Gray".

    • @Stigma-ba115
      @Stigma-ba115 4 года назад +279

      @@cartooncritique6625 Fifty shades of REY

    • @tessalyn6895
      @tessalyn6895 4 года назад +127

      @@cartooncritique6625 that doesn't count since it is literally a twilight fanfiction

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 года назад +24

      @@tessalyn6895 Fair point.

    • @yojez
      @yojez 4 года назад +45

      That’s exactly what I was thinking! Who fucking thought that having her hook up with a dude that murdered his father was a good idea? It’s so much worse