No Contact Rule For Long Distance Relationships

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  • Опубликовано: 20 янв 2025

Комментарии • 1,3 тыс.

  • @frostedpotato9891
    @frostedpotato9891 Год назад +60

    SHE REACHED OUT! I’ve been no contact for 11 days and no joke I was watching another one of coaches videos because after the gym I was feeling kind of down and doubtful on wether or not I should reach out then BAM. Her name popped up on my phone. Not only did no contact work, but it worked for me too. I was in a much better place mentally to be able to talk to her without sounding like a hurt puppy dog. Which what I would’ve done had I not found these videos, or had not realized that no contact is really about YOU.

    • @mrnegative7718
      @mrnegative7718 Год назад +2

      You were in a long distance relationship?

  • @derivativecovariant2341
    @derivativecovariant2341 5 лет назад +1062

    Whoever breaks up with this guy is in real big trouble

  • @reymondwilliam3844
    @reymondwilliam3844 4 года назад +491

    Ok everyone, listen to coach Lee carefully and follow him. If your loved one really loved you, they come back. I got mine back and we are having a wonderful relationship once again. Peace and blessings to all who are in hard times. Stay strong. Thanks coach lee, you are genius.

    • @danabacon3587
      @danabacon3587 4 года назад +11

      Are you sure? He came back and then we broke off again. Haven’t spoken since July 25

    • @ednacarere7642
      @ednacarere7642 4 года назад +2

      Very encouraging

    • @dacrazybieber
      @dacrazybieber 3 года назад

      how long was your no contact period?

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@dacrazybieber Hello I got my lover back to me with the help of Dr Wilson he helped me return my lover back to me in less than 48 hours he can help you instantly to get your ex lover

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@dacrazybieber Message Him Via Whatsapp

  • @nana0719
    @nana0719 5 лет назад +134

    I'm in long distance relationship breakup and trust me no contact works eventhough you think it is impossible to reconcile with them again... my ex boyfriend is coming back n want to give us a chances! Btw thank you coach lee ❤

    • @ghiec.8353
      @ghiec.8353 5 лет назад +2

      Hi good to hear that. How long it took before he wants to reconcile again? I can relate to this. Thanks

    • @nana0719
      @nana0719 5 лет назад +26

      @@ghiec.8353 it took almost 2 months.. after he broke up with me i just totally disappear from his life no begging no pleading and try to give him space to think about me and miss me.. get busy with your life and dont think about him too much, you dont lose him he lose an amazing girlfriend like you that he cant replace with anyone remember that.. but no contact only works if you are the dumpee i guess 😞

    • @ghiec.8353
      @ghiec.8353 5 лет назад +7

      @@nana0719 Thank you so much. I am the dumpee. After three months of break up and two months of no contact I tried to reach out and he replied immediately asking how am I and my parents, that I should take care of myself always and get enough sleep and rest always. He's also asking if I am still stressed at work. That was 3 days ago. I will just wait for him to initiate contact. I just opened the communication. I just can't stop thinking about him and worried if he has a rebound. 😓😓😓

    • @nana0719
      @nana0719 5 лет назад +7

      @@ghiec.8353 dont initiate communication with him, let him start first.. let him feel what a life without you.. dont always be available for him..i always overthink that my ex already has a rebound and if he already with someone else he will realize soon that nobody cant love him like you and he will start to miss the moment with you.. how long was your relationship with him bfore?

    • @ghiec.8353
      @ghiec.8353 5 лет назад +2

      @@nana0719 almost 1 year. Long distance, same country 45 mins plane ride. I've met him in person already and spent memorable time with each other.

  • @nimavlogs3939
    @nimavlogs3939 3 года назад +112

    I wish everyone who watching this video to have your love back again and have a strong bond. Be strong everyone.. if your intention is pure, it works definitely.. no matter how far you both. Universe guides you. Believe it. God bless you all and again I wish to have your relationship soon in best version 💐❤️

    • @jx10futuristic84
      @jx10futuristic84 3 года назад +1

      Keep you updated what happens I’m in 1 week of NC since she Broke up with me was a wonderful Relationship with no worry’s but all of a sudden boom ..

    • @saikrishna-ex2ui
      @saikrishna-ex2ui Год назад

      @@jx10futuristic84 update?

    • @Alchemist_171
      @Alchemist_171 Год назад +2

      Does it really work? I'm afraid to believe it. Don't want to be the one to have believed just to find out later that she's been sleeping with her new boyfriend while I believed in us. No. I'm tired on this emotions now. I'm tired of carrying this hope. But I can't even give up. God help me man

    • @goodoldfashionedkillingmachin
      @goodoldfashionedkillingmachin 7 месяцев назад

      💐❤

  • @thomaschang2504
    @thomaschang2504 5 лет назад +251

    Coach Lee is that one guy who call's his mother to check if she went home safe.

  • @evahatfield9477
    @evahatfield9477 4 года назад +185

    No contact really works, at first i did all the wrong things but then i went no contact & on the 4th day he texted me & i couldn't believe it. We talked for 3 hours & we are back together.

    • @karenrz98
      @karenrz98 4 года назад +25

      I pray this happens for me

    • @bhonggamelicor8860
      @bhonggamelicor8860 4 года назад +13

      I pray this happens to me too🙏☝️

    • @evahatfield9477
      @evahatfield9477 4 года назад +16

      I'm still with my boyfriend & i pray it works for both of you. I really didn't think we would get back together but i prayed & the no contact after as i said did everything wrong
      Keep the faith 😇

    • @karenrz98
      @karenrz98 4 года назад +7

      @@evahatfield9477 For me it's been 6 days now. I've noticed some behavior, he is checking my statuses, opening up snaps I've sent way before the break up (my ex isnt really active on social media) so I hope these are good signs.

    • @evahatfield9477
      @evahatfield9477 4 года назад +12

      My boyfriend is does not like social media except to text so i would say it is a good sign, where all mine went wrong i told him that i felt he didn't love me anymore so i broke up with him hoping it would wake him up well it back fired on me bc he was so hurt he shut down completely i tried to talk with him & he ignored me for a week & it hurt so bad i called & texted for days finally when i stopped he thought i had moved on, then when he texted me that he missed me my heart skipped a beat. Now we tell each other if something is bothering one of us bc i never want to go through that again , men are just as sensitive as we are i have found out. Don't give up 😇

  • @frvr1048
    @frvr1048 4 года назад +109

    Coach Lee, you don't know how much you have helped me during this emotional crisis. The way your face is framed in the video is up close and personal without being intrusive. It shows your sensitivity and experience in handling and helping people in such pain which is sometimes worse than physical. Thank you, sir. Somehow I feel alleviated listening to the tone of your voice which is firm, knowledgeable to some extent comforting. It actually matters when we feel that at the least someone understands what we are going through.

  • @xPauliAa
    @xPauliAa 5 лет назад +299

    Have you monetized your videos? I think you really deserve it, your videos have helped me so much and relaxed me during the worst times. Thank you, Coach Lee.

    • @joeg9665
      @joeg9665 2 года назад +2

      Me too. And Lees Spotify is great to listen to when driving Thank you Lee

  • @virginiaperge8207
    @virginiaperge8207 3 года назад +95

    Thank you Coach Lee for discussing long distance relationships and break up's You shed light on some uncomfortable truths I'm one month in no contact and it was difficult at first because we talked everyday and now silence but I'm working on myself

    • @danielbrown8602
      @danielbrown8602 2 года назад +1

      Any updates?

    • @virginiaperge8207
      @virginiaperge8207 2 года назад +9

      Update Thanks to Coach Lee, I felt that I deserved better than no contact and the Universe listened and brought me a perfect partner, we are getting next month!

    • @nourdinelotfi6227
      @nourdinelotfi6227 2 года назад

      Update??

  • @ZoneCoverage
    @ZoneCoverage 5 лет назад +250

    No Contact worked, Thank You

    • @oliverallen5324
      @oliverallen5324 5 лет назад +11

      I'm happy for you!

    • @Cntry06
      @Cntry06 5 лет назад +7

      @Kandis J 4 days.....then opened up dialog as to what exactly was going on. Good convo on Sun morning for an hour. Just need time and space, we'll see what happens....
      Working on myself, I've learned a lot from what I've listened to and read. Lots to work on, that will take some time.....
      Again, thanks to Coach Lee and his guidence through all of this....
      Whatever happens I move forward with a better overall understanding of relationships.

    • @Cntry06
      @Cntry06 5 лет назад +3

      @Kandis J Thank you Kandis J.
      Best of everything to You

    • @ChrisHavok
      @ChrisHavok 5 лет назад +7

      @joe l don't tell her that

    • @thehavoc6331
      @thehavoc6331 5 лет назад +4

      Zone Coverage 2019 how long did you stayed in No contact to get your ex back?

  • @tooxlent
    @tooxlent 3 года назад +19

    The emergency break up kit was the best $47 I’ve ever spent my entire life!!

  • @Louis_Vuittonya
    @Louis_Vuittonya 5 лет назад +157

    I had your phone call coaching, everything you said I should do, I did it.. the no contact was hard BUT I stuck it out and my ex would use our daughter as a way to reach out. I stuck to the plan I didn’t reach out. The no contact lasted about almost 2 months, then one day he just reached out over our daughter, but ended up talking about the relationship. At that point I was over the relationship. I had no feeling. I just let him talk and say what he had to say. 2 weeks later he was in a very bad accident and the person he had as an emergency was me. I showed up. I ended up helping him through his recovery and healing process.. I still had my boundaries tho, a month later we decided to take it day by day.. and now we’re planning a family trip this coming week for our daughters birthday. He lives 4 hours away. The distance of his move was what brought on the break up, he moved for a better job and I didn’t want to move. So as for now we’re just taking it day by day.. thanks coach lee!

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 лет назад +16

      Terrific Ton! I’m sorry for the accident but so glad you’re family is together and taking it a day at a time!

  • @oliviaernest7498
    @oliviaernest7498 5 лет назад +77

    I can't believe we ended it up like that. I just miss him so much, I want to move on because that's what we agreed on but my heart still hurts...

    • @axelsalinas5845
      @axelsalinas5845 5 лет назад +15

      Olivia Ernest I think I understand what you feel😔.
      I feel so empty and lonely inside. I just find myself checking her social media to see if she’s active when we don’t talk for days. She says she wants to keep trying but I feel like I’m the only one putting the effort in. I’m not gonna chase her but I wish she’d reach out to me and give me the attention I wanna give her. I thought maybe I should let her go until we can actually get to see each other since It’s not healthy for me to feel sad like this everyday but at the same time I don’t wanna lose her

    • @Sandrahans
      @Sandrahans 5 лет назад +6

      Your not alone,my relationship ended 2days back just for no reason.he said he lost feelings,its long dt but im hurting.i love him so much

    • @oliviaernest7498
      @oliviaernest7498 5 лет назад +9

      I feel better now, I started talking to other people. He was in another relationship and I felt like I should meet other guys and I did! It just feels like we're just not meant to be! I accepted that, I miss him but I don't want him back

    • @axelsalinas5845
      @axelsalinas5845 5 лет назад +4

      Olivia Ernest Not even joking same thing happened to me. I got over it and I started talking to other girls. I accepted it wasn’t meant to be and I don’t miss her anymore. As a matter of fact I started talking to this other girl but we ended things peacefully. Although I felt like this girl was the one and she may have been, it wasn’t the right time for both of us. Weather the universe wants to bring us together in the future, who knows but I’ve gotta keep moving forward🤷🏻‍♂️

    • @jessieliu4917
      @jessieliu4917 4 года назад

      Axel Salinas I feel the same. But my partner and I broke up 9 days ago. We were in it for 13 months. He’s never acknowledged that I was his girlfriend or anything, he called our situation a pickle, because since day 1, he knew we’d end up this way.

  • @cleyvinmay709
    @cleyvinmay709 4 года назад +267

    We are LDR because of this covid
    And its one of the reasons why we broke up and its soo hard
    reality hurts😔

    • @tamsin9422
      @tamsin9422 4 года назад +21

      Same dude

    • @cleyvinmay709
      @cleyvinmay709 4 года назад +3

      @@tamsin9422 Stay strong bro we can do this

    • @cleyvinmay709
      @cleyvinmay709 4 года назад +10

      Im still hoping while building up my self in case she won't reach out

    • @gratefulheartmom3209
      @gratefulheartmom3209 4 года назад +8

      Same here

    • @cleyvinmay709
      @cleyvinmay709 4 года назад +2

      @@gratefulheartmom3209 stay strong ma'am

  • @michaelhernandez1949
    @michaelhernandez1949 4 года назад +22

    i just want say that i didn't think the no contact rule would work but for me luckily it did and it all eerily played out exactly as Coach Lee said it would. At the start of the break up I was calling and texting i even made the trip to see her face to face and she wanted none of it. i then came across this video when i got back home and stuck to the rules of the no contact rule and seven weeks later she reached out and we are now talking and looking forward to the future together. Thank you Coach Lee I cant thank you enough

    • @elissar3580
      @elissar3580 4 года назад

      so she reached out after 7 weeks?

  • @shawdeejay8731
    @shawdeejay8731 5 лет назад +135

    My bf was kinda different .. he said if I would fight for us then I could of changed his mind . But I did no contact and he contacted me 3 weeks later . We’re back together

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 лет назад +83

      Talk is cheap. He didn’t know how he would react or to what. I’m glad that no contact helped you get back together and, actually, you used no contact to fight for him.

    • @tacobelle69
      @tacobelle69 5 лет назад +12

      Sounds like a game player... at what age does this shit stop?

    • @Luminous.Dynamics
      @Luminous.Dynamics 5 лет назад +9

      His ego was hurt. Thats why

    • @tacobelle69
      @tacobelle69 4 года назад +1

      Dalton Galindo yes, I suppose you are right. It’s exhausting

    • @elissar3580
      @elissar3580 4 года назад +1

      hope he reaches out to me soon...

  • @joyhustles
    @joyhustles 2 года назад +12

    Guys listen to coach Lee and and lose hope If you still want your ex back....I have been in LDR and this is our 3rd together.....I have been in NC for 5 weeks blocked in all social media and guess what my ex unblocked me yesterday and he reached out....just being slow and casual at the moment....you got this

  • @dmpann1
    @dmpann1 4 года назад +97

    See my problem was the opposite. I was the one willing to travel. I was the one who always did. He didn’t like the distance .... but didn’t like traveling. Maybe it’s not worth worrying about getting him back.

    • @renestarr5592
      @renestarr5592 4 года назад

      Me too

    • @mercedeslivingston8503
      @mercedeslivingston8503 4 года назад

      Same

    • @libbynovotny9979
      @libbynovotny9979 3 года назад

      my ex came to see me once, i was there far more often on my dime

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@libbynovotny9979 Hello I got my lover back to me with the help of Dr Wilson he helped me return my lover back to me in less than 48 hours he can help you instantly to get your ex lover

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@libbynovotny9979 Message Him Via Whatsapp

  • @smartrockcoolguy
    @smartrockcoolguy 5 лет назад +85

    this guy knows exactly what happens and why things happen...damnn!!

  • @hugocoty1970
    @hugocoty1970 4 года назад +125

    Everyone in quarantine right now

    • @jofreydegraaff26
      @jofreydegraaff26 4 года назад +4

      yeah it's horrible, because my ex girlfriend and i did a lot of plans this summer...

    • @L96_xTeKz1
      @L96_xTeKz1 4 года назад +6

      I’m in the same situation with my ex, she had planned to come see me now it’s all over

    • @jofreydegraaff26
      @jofreydegraaff26 4 года назад +6

      @@L96_xTeKz1 don't give up! if there was love then it's still there. Breaken up seems to be the easiest way for them now, but feelings doesn't disappear in once...the virus have take a lot away from us so please don't let it take your loved once that easy. it's over when you say it's over.

    • @L96_xTeKz1
      @L96_xTeKz1 4 года назад +2

      Jofrey De Graaff thanks for you’re response it’s just what I needed, I know that we had love and it was special! Right now Im thinking many things... I want it to work as I know we would be happy but I have doubts that she wants it to work long term. I’m currently 3 days into no contact. I hope you stay strong too, it’s a once in a lifetime situation and we will all get through this.

    • @bhonggamelicor8860
      @bhonggamelicor8860 4 года назад

      My LDR fiance broke up with me last month..she walk away and told me I won't change..

  • @marthaperez-negrete6893
    @marthaperez-negrete6893 5 лет назад +21

    Thank you Coach Lee! The No Contact Rule really WORKS!!! I would cry, it was so hard, but, you got me through it. I did get the call to come back!!!!

    • @elissar3580
      @elissar3580 4 года назад +1

      how long was the no contact period? so he finally reached out to you?

    • @marthaperez-negrete6893
      @marthaperez-negrete6893 4 года назад +4

      @@elissar3580 2 months

    • @samarztk
      @samarztk 4 года назад +4

      Martha Perez-Negrete my LDR was 2 1/2 months we are crazy for each other but fighting a lot because of the distance. We haven’t met. We broke up last week. Is there hope?

    • @dreamy605
      @dreamy605 2 года назад

      @@samarztk do you get back your ex?

  • @genallen769
    @genallen769 2 года назад +7

    Thank you coach. You helped me with my last ex and all your advice worked to the T. We got back together after 5 months of no contact, and while it didn’t work out the 2nd time around, everything you talked about was right. Now I’m currently in a long distance breakup and it’s a different ballgame for sure. He reached out last week after over a week of no contact and unblocked me to say hello and that he hoped I was doing ok. I didn’t respond until 6 hours later (time difference) and just responded cordially and kept on neutral. Haven’t heard from him since and im just keeping to no contact and letting him reach out if he wants to. I learned from my the situation with my last ex

  • @6AM96
    @6AM96 3 года назад +31

    I'm so sad, we never got to meet and moving on makes it even harder. 3 years just gone like that. Hope I will get through this

    • @Jacob-hb2rp
      @Jacob-hb2rp 2 года назад +6

      I feel your pain. 2 years over here and its only been 2 weeks.

    • @littlemissalltrac
      @littlemissalltrac 2 года назад +5

      2 years talking, never met. It's been 2 weeks 😪

    • @iamthestorm1004
      @iamthestorm1004 2 года назад +8

      Sorry for your pain
      2 years LDR, booked 2 fights hotels to meet her. Had to cancel both. I tried so hard. Guess she wasn't emotionally available
      7 months NO contact. I'm doing better day by day. If it's meant to be for us to be together with our exes, then if not it's God's will !!
      🙏🙏🙏💕

    • @Oviraptor10
      @Oviraptor10 2 года назад +2

      Same situation. How did things turn out for you?

    • @Westcoast10
      @Westcoast10 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@iamthestorm1004how did things turn out?

  • @blossom_n_gin
    @blossom_n_gin 4 года назад +14

    I really needed this information.. helped explain why my LTR ended. Thank you, Coach Lee - all makes sense now.

  • @jeffboggs1528
    @jeffboggs1528 3 года назад +4

    I like Coach Lee's video's. Most sound like he hits the nail right on the head. I was with my ex GF for 3 1/2 years. We lived an hour apart so really only got to see each other 2 - 3 times a month. She did come to my house more than I went to hers probably 60 - 40 because I live out in the country. She broke up with me 5 months ago but had broken up with me 2 other times in the past 3 years. I have been miserable without her.. . I've also broken coach Lee's rule's to many times by breaking no contact and begging and pleading. It's been rough. She finally answered a phone call 4 nights ago and I told her I changed my mind and would move in with her if it would save our relationship. She told me she didn't want to get back together with me and she didn't love me anymore. That pretty much drove a knife thru my heart for good..

    • @kungfukenny1540
      @kungfukenny1540 3 года назад +6

      Damn bro that’s terrible. How’s it going now?

  • @reginafrances4390
    @reginafrances4390 5 лет назад +144

    Not true. They CAN work. Depends on how dedicated the ppl involved are.

    • @melaniehamblett4650
      @melaniehamblett4650 5 лет назад +7

      Well said..read my main comment..I sure told this guy..muppet

    • @limon.9575
      @limon.9575 4 года назад +4

      Yeah me and my ex FaceTimed like everyday she’s 5 hours away and we were together for 7 months hopefully it works

    • @limon.9575
      @limon.9575 4 года назад +1

      Jonny Barrera okay so I can confirm she does think of you a lot with NC I kinda let go just a bit and I’m letting God handling it but I’m at least trying to be friends (I can’t see her with anyone else it hurts me to think about) but I’m giving it time now

    • @limon.9575
      @limon.9575 4 года назад

      Jonny Barrera Ig so

    • @hadtoeazyup293
      @hadtoeazyup293 4 года назад

      Limón . update?

  • @silverlining5796
    @silverlining5796 5 лет назад +14

    exactly as i felt on borrowed time from day 1. thanks god I found this one video finally just 2 weeks too late... Long distance relationship is torture.

  • @hanhtran.3107
    @hanhtran.3107 4 года назад +36

    What if I and my ex both are watching this Video and we would apply the same rule to each others 😭? Then no one would break the rule to connect to the other?

    • @itsthepersonnotthegender4309
      @itsthepersonnotthegender4309 4 года назад +4

      its said if youre the one who dump you should contact and if you are the 1 who get dump you should wait

    • @cipryan96
      @cipryan96 4 года назад +3

      The dumper does no contact? For what 😂

    • @nomatshezinxulu1982
      @nomatshezinxulu1982 4 года назад +1

      😂😂was also thinking the same thing

    • @goldenparachute392
      @goldenparachute392 3 года назад +1

      In another video, coach says wait for a specific amount of time (he’s got a video) and after that passes, then contact because you have nothing to lose at that point. And no, you don’t contact to get closure. You have closure. You contact to see if they give you a chance.

  • @FutureLegend100
    @FutureLegend100 5 лет назад +145

    I'm done fighting fam, I'm gonna be the best version of myself and I am a prize,I tryed going over her place she denied me that,if we ever see eachother and she still wants me she needs to put in some work ,cuz I'm done
    Update: she dont need to put any work, just leave em lol. Your better off alone🥳💯

    • @xonlytyrek3601
      @xonlytyrek3601 5 лет назад +3

      Mr. okay same bro💯

    • @frankiesarchives475
      @frankiesarchives475 4 года назад +1

      GG KING 👑

    • @FutureLegend100
      @FutureLegend100 4 года назад +8

      2020 Update : Single And Winning 👊🏼🥳💯

    • @frankiesarchives475
      @frankiesarchives475 4 года назад +1

      @@FutureLegend100 thats epic man! I'm currently going through an ldr breakup myself and I'm kind of lost right now. I hope I get better soon :/

    • @FutureLegend100
      @FutureLegend100 4 года назад +4

      @@frankiesarchives475 the best advice I can give you is keep moving forward, even small steps towards a better you is progress, don't stop even on days you feel you cant keep going, your future self will thank you. No one will look after yourself better then yourself.

  • @Steven-gg1bn
    @Steven-gg1bn 4 года назад +11

    Covid destroyed my LDR. I started a new job in March 2020 that would have allowed me to travel and see my partner a lot more frequently and regularly than before. Those dreams were quickly crushed by the pandemic and now I’m trying NC to try and save our relationship. Every day is excruciating but I’m in love and want them back so bad 😭😭

  • @tulsibloom
    @tulsibloom 5 лет назад +29

    There was a actually so many points brought up in here that I hadn't really thought about or considered which were really helpful. Thanks so much!

    • @jimsota7059
      @jimsota7059 2 года назад

      You mind to share some of this points?

  • @JelenaVecic024
    @JelenaVecic024 4 года назад +9

    "So why say goodbye? What are we sorry for?
    I have lived a magnificent life
    because I really knew how to do it
    If you hear: I died,
    - don’t believe it.
    Because it’s something I don’t know how to do.
    Love is the only air I’ve ever breathed
    and laughter the only language in the world that I understand
    I have just dropped by on this earth, to give you a wink.
    To leave something behind
    like a fluttering trace.
    Therefore, don’t be sad.
    The only thing I care for is
    to remain silly in your eyes and strangely dear to your heart.
    At night, when you look up to the sky,
    you give me a wink too
    let it be a secret.
    In spite of gray days,
    when you see a comet turning the horizon red,
    remember: its me
    still silly flying and living." - An Immortal Poem , M.A.

  • @jiehuang9289
    @jiehuang9289 4 года назад +13

    Tough when you're in two countries and don't have plans for each other in the near future... I guess the two of us didn't like the other deep enough that we were willing to throw back what we have and start a completely blank life in an alien place... But I do miss him, a lot.

  • @MimMdance
    @MimMdance 3 года назад +28

    This annoys the hell out of me because if we would still live in the same place I know I could have gotten back, at least physically and therefore reignite some feeling. There was an open window during the breakup, moments of weakness around Christmas, but of course we could not meet and then she went cold again.
    F**** Corona!

  • @monicawylie3985
    @monicawylie3985 2 года назад +7

    I was in a LDR. it’s been 55 days. This is the second time I’m watching this particular video. Im losing hope.

    • @JoMama123451234
      @JoMama123451234 4 месяца назад

      Update? I'm on day 59 after 3 year LDR. I'm also losing hope

  • @Sabrina-lc1ux
    @Sabrina-lc1ux 4 года назад +6

    I watch this whenever I am engulfed with sadness and loss. I started NC and he texted after 4 days. It was a very casual chat like how,s the weather etc. Then I continue NC again. I cant do or decide anything now due to the lock down and we cant meet up anytime soon. It will take another at least 4-6 months before I or he is allowed to travel. And I am still reflecting . Trying to picture our future together. We are not young couple. There'll be lots of sacrifices to make to be together. The love for each other must be super strong to eventually make that sacrifices and be together.I thought I didnt love him enough. I was looking forward to breaking up but he beat me to it. It has been a week now and I am still hurting. I am still figuring out whether I am sad for the loss of something familiar or for the loss of love. If only someone is kind enough to talk to me. I am hurting.

    • @charmierodrigo9959
      @charmierodrigo9959 4 года назад

      Same situation sis. I feel you💔

    • @charmierodrigo9959
      @charmierodrigo9959 4 года назад

      Mine is worst actually. He got engaged in just less than a month. He is from Saudi and he was pressured by his family to get married. We been together for 2 years. I can still feel he loves me. He messaged me and told me to let him build me a future for me. I can't . I don't want anything from him but himself. I'm so hurt.

  • @gabrielamedrano6866
    @gabrielamedrano6866 28 дней назад +1

    I like when you say "but don't worry" after you put the worse that could happen 🤭 Thanks for the video.

  • @Theinsomniac826
    @Theinsomniac826 5 лет назад +68

    That's very interesting that most are in long distance relationships like me. He pursued me from a distance in 2014 and is now saying he won't close the gap and move.

    • @majormoku
      @majormoku 5 лет назад +7

      Same... and so he bailed. 4 years gone. 😞

    • @barbarashyamaleechong8754
      @barbarashyamaleechong8754 5 лет назад +8

      @@majormoku same with me ..we been in a relationship 5 yrs and he is there every day but recently have been very distant and sometimes vague in his conversation with me and when I kept asking him about it he hot angry and we argued I hot angry and hung up ..he has not contacted me since..I texted him explaining myself and apologizing. But nothing from him ..not sure if he just ignores my last 2 text or turned off his read receipts..I miss him but I'm trying no contact ..😔

    • @majormoku
      @majormoku 5 лет назад +7

      @@barbarashyamaleechong8754 I know it's hard. I've not talked to him in a month now. I'm just trying to work on myself and heal... at this point things are out of my hands. I hope you find some calm and peace.

    • @barbarashyamaleechong8754
      @barbarashyamaleechong8754 5 лет назад +4

      @@majormoku Thank you ..yeh I'm trying to focus on me too ..its been almost 2 weeks and He has done this before..but never for this long....lets see...

    • @jillbrown8036
      @jillbrown8036 5 лет назад +5

      Me to he pursued it with me to.😐he went after me!2014 is it the same guy😅😅😅😃

  • @karankumarofficialid
    @karankumarofficialid 2 года назад +7

    Sir only one video on long distance relationship please upload more videos in this topic or long distance relationship ex back series ND what are the positive point on long distance relationship , love from India

  • @judytregarthen9094
    @judytregarthen9094 4 года назад +40

    Today is my 3rd day of no contact, and we are long distance. To be honest I don't think we'll ever talk again it's just a gut feeling. God has other plans for me.

  • @YankeeBlueFalcon
    @YankeeBlueFalcon 5 лет назад +26

    Thank you Coach. Your insight is invaluable to helping me(us) understand how attachments, childhood conditioning and fear based decisions can be identified and confronted. Each of your videos is great reminder to me and your audience of how to change behaviors that are self-sabotaging.

  • @dylanm.4473
    @dylanm.4473 5 лет назад +66

    I’m trying no contact rn I hope this works cuz I’m hurting

    • @formangrilling111
      @formangrilling111 5 лет назад

      Dylan M. I feel like it doesn’t bro :/

    • @alighadz2872
      @alighadz2872 5 лет назад +3

      Don’t worry man listen these videos help but only for a certain amount of time but honestly you want something permanent so listen to me when I tell you go to religion whatever religion you believe in resort to that trust me it helps much more.

    • @jessarosario2776
      @jessarosario2776 5 лет назад +1

      Dylan M. update?

    • @dylanm.4473
      @dylanm.4473 5 лет назад +4

      a bced it worked you are just going to have some trust issues

    • @avilawhelbert9559
      @avilawhelbert9559 4 года назад

      Dylan M. It does

  • @AmazingScorpioWoman
    @AmazingScorpioWoman 5 месяцев назад

    Been watching you from Cairo, Egypt for days and days, you saved me from myself. He lives in Florida and we met at work in Egypt, he ghosted me brutally and suddenly he reached out casually after the 4 months solid no contact. I responded casually and we will see how it will go from here.

  • @mononokhune289
    @mononokhune289 5 лет назад +19

    My ex wished me happy Valentine's day,during no contact rule.

    • @abeerhasan2627
      @abeerhasan2627 4 года назад +3

      Monono Khune Mine too! Simple “hey just wanted to say happy valentines”
      Like wtf is that

  • @Kmgo-r2c
    @Kmgo-r2c 4 месяца назад +2

    17days no contact, and the break up was 37days ago. I broke the first contact period after 12 days. I didn’t beg but I reached out a few days, to check on her. I was supposed to move to her country ( i lived there with her for some months, and we were separated now 2 months) and right before that she broke up with me, because she wanted to be alone and got a new job. I leave this comment here so i can look back at it in the future. I feel the situation is hopeless, and that she won’t be reaching out again. I hope i can read this in the future and laugh at it.

  • @Cjmaverick77
    @Cjmaverick77 5 лет назад +57

    I was in a somewhat long distance relationship. We saw each other once a week. We lived only 60 miles apart which isn’t bad compared to most LDR. I didn’t care, I was always willing to make the trip every week and she was too..but then things changed and it seemed like she wanted something more convenient. I always tried to prove that it was worth it, because she was worth it (before she changed) and I was willing to move out to her area but in the end, she just distanced herself and broke up with me. Day 54 since the break up and NC.

    • @ryancoburn6607
      @ryancoburn6607 5 лет назад +13

      My girlfriend lived an hour and 15 minutes at first it was only once or twice a week n the last 4 months together i would stay at her house alot but when we were not together we were texting alot but it became too much for her. When i was texting alot more than her. Probably pushed her away n me being too nice and putting her first n doing everything she wanted. I helped her move and was supposed to stay with her during the week and 2 days later she wanted a break for the weekend i gave her 5 days n it got to the point where i wasn't patient enough and felt like she was stringing me along. She basically told me she doesn't love me anymore n wants to focus on herself and get her life together and will contact me whenever it happens. Which I'm not holding her to that but at least we didn't end on bad terms but today is day 5 no contact and haven't heard a peep from her since.

    • @mridhulml9238
      @mridhulml9238 4 года назад +1

      @@ryancoburn6607 what happened now? please update?

    • @kungfukenny1540
      @kungfukenny1540 3 года назад +1

      @@ryancoburn6607 update

    • @TChalla-yg8bl
      @TChalla-yg8bl 2 года назад

      went through somewhat of the same thing..

  • @MUTAONAIR
    @MUTAONAIR 4 года назад +5

    Coach lee sir! You are absoultley right about everything you said in this video. Thank you very much for this information.

  • @conradsmith9441
    @conradsmith9441 4 года назад +9

    We spent a total of 90 hours together, but most of those hours were of us talking on FaceTime.

  • @maryambalouchkhosravi851
    @maryambalouchkhosravi851 3 года назад +2

    Omg i was doing the no contact rule for 3 week and i saw this with long distance relationships and wrote an text to my ex now i am the meaning of life! This really works

  • @tinkertaylorm0624
    @tinkertaylorm0624 5 лет назад +26

    Your videos have been helpful, especially this one. Thank you. It made me realize what I need to work on, thank you for all that you do.

  • @hb-studentoflife
    @hb-studentoflife 3 года назад +1

    Coach Lee is the sh**! He truly gives incredible advice.

  • @ThomasCassonActor
    @ThomasCassonActor 5 лет назад +17

    Has there ever been cases of someone moving on completely and then months years later it rekindled and they get back together?

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 лет назад +14

      Absolutely.

    • @ThomasCassonActor
      @ThomasCassonActor 5 лет назад +6

      @@RealCoachLee heck.. So don't cry yourself to sleep if they moved on. If it's meant to be..

  • @danielbrown8602
    @danielbrown8602 2 года назад +4

    She told me when we met she was okay with me being a truck driver. Now all of a sudden she isn't. She left me for someone else that she had been chasing for years. She turned cold and sent me packing. Left me homeless after asking me to move in.

    • @Benedict-n6j
      @Benedict-n6j 19 дней назад

      Same with me bro, she left me because I'm unemployed

    • @danielbrown8602
      @danielbrown8602 19 дней назад

      ​@Benedict-n6j
      We got back together 5 months later. We're now married. She's currently in the hospital and I'm uncertain if she will make it. It's like she's given up on life.

  • @osahonosa9186
    @osahonosa9186 5 лет назад +18

    I came here looking for advice on what to do. I got mostly negatives out of it tbh...

    • @tacobelle69
      @tacobelle69 5 лет назад

      It’s sucks but it’s the truth

  • @TheGreshamgirL
    @TheGreshamgirL 10 месяцев назад +1

    What if I blocked him after he dumped me (after a conflict), then the next day I unblocked him and he had blocked me too. Does that make me the dumper? He said “I’m done”, but I think he was trying to talk it through and I just blocked him instead.

  • @_Lazare
    @_Lazare 2 года назад +3

    LDR .... through knowledge and that heart break , I have changed and rightly so !!! I gained so so much on my own , I actually caught up with everything that deemed doing ! Never seeked anything other than bettering myself ! And ... I’am so thankful for my ex !
    Yes ! I do hope she reaches out one day . I’am not sure of any direction if that were to happen tho I’am grateful being words of everything I have acquired from her and that indeed made me who I’am today . So yes at times I think of her . It doesn’t rule me tho now , it simply made me an excellent person ! And for that I’ll always be greatful to her ! Whether she knows that or not ! It’s ok .
    I’m one happy guy now because of her !
    So be thankful in everything !

    • @sukiarts
      @sukiarts Год назад

      @StLazare did she reach out?

  • @mikhailpartap335
    @mikhailpartap335 4 года назад +27

    I've been in a long distance relationship for 12 years with my ex.We usually see each other almost every month I fly to her. Everything was fine until the quarantine period and we haven't seen each other in 6 months and not sure when due to travel restrictions. It's really difficult because we are both each other's first love. Last time we met we even discussed getting engaged and started looking at it because next year we planned to move in together . I'm really hurt because we sacrificed soo much for so long then she broke up last friday. Any suggestions?

    • @bullfitness5398
      @bullfitness5398 4 года назад

      Yes please.. I can use some help with this situation too

    • @H2oLordgsm
      @H2oLordgsm 3 года назад +4

      its useless long distances are trash ..

    • @rwentfordable
      @rwentfordable 2 года назад +5

      What's the point of a LDR for that long? 12 years is insane. It's a potential of one, there's no real thing as a LDR. Should have a plan to finally live together.

    • @nishantbafna9333
      @nishantbafna9333 Год назад

      I feel so sorry for you... I wish she comes back.

    • @fruitsarelife7073
      @fruitsarelife7073 Год назад +1

      To be fair 12 years is extremely long. And the pandemic probably gave her the feeling that it’s never going to end. But yeah it’s still sad.

  • @seeya7610
    @seeya7610 5 лет назад +19

    What If both parties did dumping simultaneously during an argument and no contact from both ends now ?

    • @mattykay1137
      @mattykay1137 5 лет назад +1

      See Ya
      Maybe reach out
      Play it cool
      And say
      Hope all is well
      It would be nice too hear from you
      Have a great day
      Then go into no contact and wait Untill you get a response
      Don’t push anything too heavy if your partner responds
      Keep it civil.

    • @michaeljackson7361
      @michaeljackson7361 4 года назад +2

      Forget them

  • @benmartin3959
    @benmartin3959 4 года назад +2

    My girlfriend of two years broke up with me a couple months ago after 5 months of long distance due to college (and I go to a military service academy so I can’t just get on a plane and see her when I please). Sucks big time. When I first came home for Christmas and saw her, which was about a month after the breakup, we actually had a couple really good days together and it felt like normal. We both said we really loved it and it was looking up. A couple days later she broke my heart again saying we should just be apart. I went full no contact, she texted me on Christmas Eve and Christmas, and then the other day she asked if we wanted to see each other before I go back to school and I agreed. So we’re getting dinner tomorrow and I fly back across the country the next morning. I’m so nervous and don’t know what she’s gonna say, as she was clearly wanting to see me before I go back. And I know we’re back to what made us break up in just a couple days. We were so good together but maybe we just need to grow up some more.
    Also, my older brother and his girlfriend survived this exact situation (I go to the same school he did). 4+ years of long distance. They’re the anomaly, but I still have hope for me because our relationship was so good and I know I’m a catch in her eyes. Wish me luck.

    • @florankechi6871
      @florankechi6871 4 года назад

      I know of a powerful man who help me bring back my Ex in just 2days after many years ago

    • @florankechi6871
      @florankechi6871 4 года назад

      Just message him now on WhatsApp and your problems will be solved within 2days

    • @florankechi6871
      @florankechi6871 4 года назад

      +2349137313732✅

  • @lisawilliams4365
    @lisawilliams4365 4 года назад +8

    It was long distance relationship I did not know he was married when I found out I dumped him

  • @Dragracer612
    @Dragracer612 3 года назад +2

    I'll never try another LDR...if 3 hours is considered long distance. But this is hell on earth. I pray for us all.

  • @jhazcam5670
    @jhazcam5670 Год назад +3

    Just wanted to come back here and comment that my 3 years ldr ex came back after 83 days! As cliche as it sounds you just have to give it time and focus on yourself during that time. No contact is crucial to give your ex the time to process through their feelings. Were taking it slowly right now, but I personally feel so much better about us again. I hope the best of luck for everyone! Please do remember that no contact is for you and not to solely get your ex back. You have to be courageous enough to live your life for you! Good luck!

    • @winterkai12
      @winterkai12 Год назад +1

      Did you ever talk or NC at all within this 83 days?

    • @jhazcam5670
      @jhazcam5670 Год назад +2

      @@winterkai12 Nope, no communication at all. For the majority of the time I was radio silence.

    • @winterkai12
      @winterkai12 Год назад +1

      @@jhazcam5670 thank you so much, I was so confused on doing radio silence and NC. I really wanted to do radio silence, my ex keeps on viewing my stories, I want him back but I felt like he didn't deserve any update about my life anymore. The breakup happened before the supposed meetup.

    • @winterkai12
      @winterkai12 Год назад +1

      @@jhazcam5670 honestly, you just gave me the strength to go radio silent instead. Thank you.

    • @JorgeSalgado-w2t
      @JorgeSalgado-w2t 11 месяцев назад +1

      Mine is 2years and 4 months ldr 399miles away now it’s been 46 days no contact and blocked on everything because of begging and before being blocked, I showed up at her house she was upset still and she told I will tell you when it’s the right time again but I was desperate. It’s because of school for her 😢 busy and stress or friends changing her mind or maybe someone she’s talking to who knows. I miss her and our little dog I got her on her 20th birthday 😢. We did a lot of memories together.

  • @reignreadings
    @reignreadings 12 дней назад

    Literally just got hit with this. Thank you so much for your video. I’ll be watching your „ex” one after this too.

  • @anyakosta364
    @anyakosta364 5 лет назад +10

    soo True............ every time i came back to him for 6 month in the year 1st Month was a honeymoon......... then followed with the coldness and a silent treatment
    god help me why im still in love............. with this soul mate........... 9 years after..............i should feel i deserve it............i actually feel our long distance....... have saved our
    relationship........ cause up close and personal we both acted none committed........... he left me up right and left any time he can abandonment me and i have acted out the same
    due to revenge feelings or not.......... Universe........... is not against us....... but trying to set up what we are able to face........and sadly....... it was only that much.......

  • @diovestv6656
    @diovestv6656 5 лет назад +11

    My ex still loves me but she choose to break up than to give our relationship second change. we are in a long distance relationship. she cried while saying it's over, what should I do? please help me.

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 лет назад +2

      Definitely no contact as the video says. Watch this video all the way through: m.ruclips.net/video/GQR5Wefd-Uc/видео.html

    • @diovestv6656
      @diovestv6656 5 лет назад +1

      Hope everything will goes as planned. From now on then I will rely on your advice coach Lee thank you so much .

    • @topgunner1962
      @topgunner1962 5 лет назад +2

      @@diovestv6656 update?

    • @juniorlugo2814
      @juniorlugo2814 3 года назад

      Update

    • @kungfukenny1540
      @kungfukenny1540 3 года назад

      @@diovestv6656 update

  • @sean2119
    @sean2119 4 года назад +19

    No contact worked ! My ex reached after a month no contact. But I would be able to visit her anytime soon, should I back to no contact for a few months? Or keep texting with her "politely"?

  • @shawnjesseman664
    @shawnjesseman664 4 года назад +10

    I'm not sure me and my exes relationship would be considered long distance or not. She lived an hour away and we were together twice a week. I've been in no contact for 3 days, the breakup was a month ago.
    I will add, we were together for 2 and a half years.

    • @benspeer3075
      @benspeer3075 4 года назад +1

      11/2 years for me, distance was only 54 minutes away, claimed it was distance that killed it, loves me but not in love etc. been in NC for a month now

    • @AimedWolf
      @AimedWolf 2 года назад

      Updates?

    • @shawnjesseman664
      @shawnjesseman664 2 года назад +2

      @@AimedWolf Haven't seen or heard from her in over 2 years.

  • @EldritchAugur
    @EldritchAugur 3 года назад +3

    I'm not long distance with my GF but we basically operated as such due to having opposite work schedules and subpar living situations that made it very difficult to see each other frequently. I worked really hard for months to get myself a better job, and get myself my own place so we could have more space and have a real relationship. It took almost a year and one of the most stressful periods in my life to pull it off.
    Unfortunately a couple weeks after I started my new job and began planning for a place to move into she broke up with me. She said she was tired of trying and doesn't see a future with me. She's figuring out her future as well and is planning on going to college a couple hours away from me. I tried to tell her that I would do anything to make it work, 2 hours away isn't that far. I could drive there and spend the whole weekend with her every weekend and we'd be able to see each other more than we've ever been able to in our entire relationship. We've been dating for almost 2 years and the only time we've been able to spend the night together is a few days total on vacation. But all it did was make her more angry, I could tell she thought it was just an excuse even though I was being sincere.
    I don't know how to convince her that it could work other than just backing off for a while and seeing if she'll change her mind.

  • @NofyahShemTov
    @NofyahShemTov 2 года назад

    We're dating on and off for two years. We kept breaking up because of two hours distance driving and work schedule. I had to move to a less expensive city, and he's the one with the good job and kids. I'm a widow with kids so I'm not beholden to an ex. I took the plunge and moved closer. We'd broken up two months before. I expected nothing. At first when I needed something I asked him lightly "would you like to do me a favor?" And it slowly built from there... doing errands together, small excuses to get together during his lunch, etc.. slow and cautious. With a time balance.. so far so good. But here's the caveat: every time we struggled with time commitment when we were far away I'd known it wasn't because of a fight or because of no attraction. It was the opposite, extreme attraction with the frustration of distance. I also had to accept before I moved that maybe we wouldn't be together at all.
    I also had major problems with the apartment I was moving out of and he handled many arguments with my landlord that I never expected him to help with.
    Is it where I want yet? No. We're both cautious. But he's stepping up, helping me with furniture and putting my resume out there.

  • @ivia_ol8356
    @ivia_ol8356 5 лет назад +8

    We weren't in a relationship so to speak, we were getting closer, but I pushed real hard and in return he cut me off. Did no contact for 5 weeks, it didn't work. I reached out with casual message, he didn't open it

    • @stillencharger
      @stillencharger 5 лет назад +5

      Livia_Ol i contacted almost 7 weeks later no response, don’t reach out I would let them chase you, we lived together at some point, we were a couple for 5 years.

    • @edgeofugly
      @edgeofugly 5 лет назад +1

      Your fault. Youp pushed him off, he doesnt find you attracting anymore. Lesson learned, Move on

  • @haizin7321
    @haizin7321 2 года назад +3

    He cheated and I walked away . Been in no contact since April. I never begged or explained anything….just went on radio silence since I felt that’s what he wanted. We were in LDR for 9 years this year …i felt disrespected and unappreciated ,thus I went no contact and radio silent…

  • @VeronicaSofiaNitu
    @VeronicaSofiaNitu 5 лет назад +11

    Hey Coach Lee, can you make a video about the guy initiating No Contact first?
    Last week a guy I liked blocked me on every messaging platform with no warning, even though we'd been friends for 5 months and voice called every day for about 4-5 hours a time. He blocked me a week before my flight to his country, where we were planning to hang out.
    I know self improvement should be a constant regardless of who initiates NC but I'm curious to hear about what the likelihood of him coming back is, or about what we should be doing about social media in that time, etc.
    Thank you! Love your videos!

    • @sarahjane6494
      @sarahjane6494 5 лет назад

      Veronica Sofia Nitu yes same thing is happening to me now!!!! Pls help😭

    • @VeronicaSofiaNitu
      @VeronicaSofiaNitu 5 лет назад +3

      @@sarahjane6494 Girl he ended up unblocking me, messaging me to apologize, and I took that opening to block him everywhere myself so he couldn't contact me anymore. Went NC ever since, been minding my own business and to be honest with you, it's been a massive relief.
      My advice to you is that if he's acting like an asshole, he is one and he's not worth sticking around for. Move on to something better

    • @TheBloodyBlackJackal
      @TheBloodyBlackJackal 5 лет назад +2

      Veronica Sofia Nitu I mean... some people have emotional issues that cause them to act in erratic and irrational ways, doesn’t mean they are being “an asshole”.

  • @A07667
    @A07667 Год назад

    I was in a 8 month long distance relationship. My ex gf lives in Poland and me in USA. We met online and then once in person during the summer. I wasn’t working for some time because i was prepping for law school. When i returned I got busy with law school felt overwhelmed and ended up breaking up with her. Something I never thought I’d do because I loved her but it did feel like she was too needy. Anyway, we got back together within a few days but me doing that changed our dynamic. We argued a lot. She felt i wasn’t listening to her and it was true. So she would yell and lash out to me (she was also bi polar and maybe borderline too) then one day she broke up with me. I accepted it at the time as I thought it was best. She kept speaking to me after and we spoke almost as if we were together saying I miss you and so on. I even re booked a ticket to see her for winter break. I didn’t want to get back together during this time. Wanted to see her in person. She kept saying she missed me then changed about a month before my trip to see her. I got jealous and she hated it and said we were just friends (i feel she met someone) i flew all the way to Poland for her to meet me and say we will never be together and that my feelings made her uncomfortable. I begged once while i was there but she left me alone in this country after i landed. It was cruel. She was different. Looked at me as if she never had any feelings. The last time i went it was bliss. I really felt we loved each other but I guess it was stronger for me because I have been so broken up crying every night. I can’t believe i flew to another country for her and she didn’t feel anything for me. Unfollowed all my social media. I did text her once during the time i was there and she said she regretted she gave met her new number. (Thats what i meant i begged) stopped messaging her. It’s been 2.5 weeks. I can’t believe she did that to me. I’d never do this to someone unless they cheated or were abusive to me in the past. She had her Ig private and then un did it a few days ago and I believe i saw her with another girl. Not sure but i think so. I’m so depressed because even though i did what i did and broke up that time. I still loved and still love her. This was the most intense I felt for someone . I’m sure she doesn’t care for me at all after how she acted. That’s another level of no caring. Knowing someone you claimed you used to love traveled to see you and you meet them there first day in the country and abandon them. During Christmas and new year by the way. I felt so alone but it’s my fault ? Because she wanted me to not accept the breakup it seemed. I let her go. I hate myself currently.

  • @denbysk8
    @denbysk8 4 года назад +3

    So true i was in a ldr for nearly 2 years not good please people it doesnt work. Save yourself the heart ache focus on yourself and allow someone to come into your life who is near you and not in another country. Believe me im going through some serious heart ache atm. Take my advice dont do it. Its a rare thing if it works

  • @dogchopz
    @dogchopz 2 года назад +1

    Hi coach Lee.
    I was with my ex girlfriend for a year and we were totally in love. But unfortunately she was 24 and I was 41.. we have so much in common and connect well. But a few times over the year we argued about her wanting to travel.. thus only came out when we were drunk. I said if you’re going travelling we need to break up. She cried and never wanted to. Fast forward a year and she got offered a job on a yacht whilst seeing her more privileged friends in France. It was a take it or leave it and start within a week job.. when she got back she told me and said she wasn’t sure how long she’d be and wanted to do a bit of travelling too. I broke up with her because she couldn’t give a deadline. She wanted to do a long distance relationship but I said no.
    She cried hysterically for days before she left.. we both were crushed. It’s been a month now and I still think about her. She was finding reasons to contact me but I said I don’t do “friends”after a breakup.
    She then contacted me making chit chat.
    I ignored her as it was too painful to keep in touch. She said she would of been loyal but I know with the passing of time feelings and loyalties fade.
    She may be back in 6 months or more.. or less.. or maybe never as she was fed up with her job and had no friends of her own where we/I live.
    I’ve been no contact but I don’t know what to do long term.
    I really want to be with her again once she’s got this out of her system.. as she wasn’t ready to commit properly because she needed to travel and hebe some experiences first.
    What do I do?

    • @Rahkiya
      @Rahkiya Год назад +1

      Find someone the same age.

    • @bernieoconnell5515
      @bernieoconnell5515 Год назад +1

      Exactly. What are you at. She’s young enough to be your daughter anyway and wants different things from
      Life. She will get over the crying believe me when she meets lads her own age. Do her a favour and let her go.unless you want to end up being her papa.

  • @jlj777
    @jlj777 5 лет назад +15

    Long distance relationships are mostly just a string along game and we all know that. There will always be of excuses why cohabitation is not right at this time. More than likely the honeymoon period has passed and there is no need to move together when you can just drop by and have sex without the responsibility.

  • @BackeB
    @BackeB 3 года назад +1

    I started dating this girl i December. We dated for a month and build a really nice connection. She lives in another country. We met there, but in the beginning of Jan I went home for different reasons. Our connection still got stronger and stronger in my view, even though we were apart. About one month ago the replies started to slow down on her part. A few days later we talked and she said our connection was fading away, and that she’s unsure about us getting together again. The confusion was total for me because it all was good until she basically started ghosting me. Now, I understand the disadvantage in dating one month and being apart for two.
    Now I’m back in her country for work. I’ve sent one text saying I made it back despite covid. No reply. Now I’ll be silent until (and if) she reaches out. Wish me luck

  • @27bobbyrix
    @27bobbyrix 5 лет назад +24

    My ex broke up with me and said we can be friends. So i tried the no contact rule she reached out to me 3 weeks later and said "you forgot about me." I was little confused.

    • @arzhb.4471
      @arzhb.4471 5 лет назад +19

      How I wish my for my ex to do the same thing.

    • @thehavoc6331
      @thehavoc6331 5 лет назад +2

      Bobby Jackson were you guys In long distance relationship? What caused you guys to break up?

    • @JelenaVecic024
      @JelenaVecic024 4 года назад +2

      @@arzhb.4471 wish that too.. :(

    • @thehavoc6331
      @thehavoc6331 2 года назад +1

      Any updates?

  • @BrainStew1763
    @BrainStew1763 Год назад

    My gf and I dated for 5 months. At the beginning of the last month of us being together, she moved 1,700 miles away. This move was planned and she had told me about this before we started officially dating.
    We had a plan that I was supposed to see her next month. The day she left, I became super depressed and I fell apart. I talked to her every day but I had a lot going on with my job, health, family, that made it hard for me to devote all of my attention to her and my phone. My communication with her wasn’t good enough, she didn’t feel special, and she couldn’t handle the guilt of leaving me and her family. We’ve been in NC for only 3 days now but it hurts so bad.

  • @smooclothingline8216
    @smooclothingline8216 5 лет назад +12

    Me and my ex have been broken up for about a week the same amount of time I've been in NC with him we've been in a LDR about 18 months, when I finally decided that I was going to move he told me we should break up because he doesn't want to feel like he's forcing me to move. He doesn't even want to talk to me Im extremely heartbroken what should I do?

    • @natural91LC
      @natural91LC 7 месяцев назад

      Same thing happened to me … he did that after I got my visa. He blocked me because I texted him too much asking for an exclamation and he said I wanted to fight. I have a lot of dialysis and made mistakes but I’m not the only one. He broke my heart 💔 did he ever come back?

  • @StaceyFeltham
    @StaceyFeltham 4 года назад +1

    together almost 6 years
    living together almost 5
    he goes away for work training, he calls me up and says he has no more room left in his life for me. Then a bunch of excuses, i flew to him he clearly still loves me and he said he doesnt know if he made the right choice but he made a choice . This entire thing so a bloody mess and its heatbreaking as i believe his friends got into his head

  • @brightlight7388
    @brightlight7388 5 лет назад +10

    We chatted already 3 yrs and we both feel the same way.. We video call everyday. We meet once but he dont want commitment and dont like the word "distance" but he said he loved me. Until he asking me to give him space to breath but he dont want to lose contact with me. .. Every day he message me to ask how i am. Everytime i open up about meeting him again. He always said he dont know what he want... ☹️
    I loved him so much but have to pretend that i dont have feelings for him.

    • @jessieliu4917
      @jessieliu4917 4 года назад +1

      Similar situation here. We broke up 9 days ago ;(

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@jessieliu4917 Hello I got my lover back to me with the help of Dr Wilson he helped me return my lover back to me in less than 48 hours he can help you instantly to get your ex lover

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@jessieliu4917 Message Him Via Whatsapp

    • @ishakumohammed6154
      @ishakumohammed6154 3 года назад

      @@jessieliu4917 + 2 3 4 9 0 6 3 7 3 1 6 5 0.. .

    • @thehavoc6331
      @thehavoc6331 2 года назад

      Any update?

  • @OraclesFTP
    @OraclesFTP Год назад +1

    Coach lee I need your help or anyone here’s advice. Me and my ex broke up for about 2-3 weeks ago. She called me after having no contact with her for 6 days because some serious thing happened to her and she was scared and hurt. She called me crying and I was there for her to help her be more calm and make her feel more safe and I was there to listen to her. A few days pass and I’m trying to talk to her and she being very distant doesn’t respond fast or seems uninterested and other times she responds fast we face time too and she smiling at me and I’m making her laugh. Not flirting with her or asking about us at all. A day later she told she can’t handle the pressure of us being a thing or not or can’t hold my hand right now or tip for around me. She told me she loves me still and said we should work on ourselves and said “I know we’ll find eachother again”. I told her I completely understand and told her I love her too and didn’t argue or beg and let her go. Should I stay no contact permanently or reach out in 2-4 months? I don’t want to lose her or if she does move on I want to respectfully leave it alone. We were together for a year and 2 months and did see eachother a good amount of times too. I visited her, she visited me.

  • @spatulawithcurd5051
    @spatulawithcurd5051 4 года назад +18

    Wait so do we do no contact or not? I kinda got confused by this video

    • @TheJoppa99
      @TheJoppa99 3 года назад +1

      Right? When should we who have gotten broken up with make a move? I know your comment is five months old.. How did you manage, what happened? :(

  • @chloeilling4014
    @chloeilling4014 8 месяцев назад

    Ldr for 3 years
    I ended it with him as he promised for 2 years he would move in .promised he would look for a job in my town and then accepted a job in his town.he didn't drive but would visit as much as he could and im a single mum i would drive him home, pick him up , stay at his when i could. He lives with his father and is possibly losing his job due to company problems. We live 2 hours apart.
    What hurts the most is him promising to move in and now doesnt want to unless my behaviour changes (hes been aggressive/violent in the past) blames me for everything blocked me after i told him i missed him he use to say i was tryjng to guilt trip him into moving when i was only trying to express how after 3 years im tired of ldr.
    It hurts how he moved in with a few other exs and not me.
    Ive blocked him everywhere and trying to move on its so painful. He claimed i was the love of his life he helped so much in my home but obviously didnt love me enough to close the distance. Do you think if i leave him alone he will have a change of heart??

  • @baphometbby
    @baphometbby 4 года назад +3

    I noticed the conversations we had had started to get boring a week before we broke up and I didn’t see it before and he felt I wasn’t listening to him and now I feel really bad because I realize I was responding without any real input and it probably felt cold. He decided we’re incompatible, now I don’t know what to do or if he’ll miss me that much. He still loved me I believe

    • @asmaghars
      @asmaghars 4 года назад

      Give us an update im in this situation.. Im dying

  • @Poopooshoe90
    @Poopooshoe90 5 лет назад +4

    My gf just broke up with me, we have been a couple since 17yrs old now nearlly 29. She says she’s sad but doesn’t know why . She cheated on me with her dance partner. Who’s a girl but she’s not gay? The girl was married and her wife was abusing her. So my gf was always helping her and supporting her. Now she says she might have feelings for her, and she loves me but doesn’t want to have a future. Even though that’s all we talked about. She doesn’t seem like herself she talks and acts differently now. And says because she cheated on me she can’t be around me. Any help? She was my world and my life and heart literally feels broken and over

    • @henare101
      @henare101 5 лет назад

      This is always the case the person becomes obsessed with the other person and makes them act in ways you've never seen before, mean, un caring, brutal, dishonest etc. They will get over it eventually and realise what they've done was horrible. when the act like this they're in a heightened state and not thinking rationally

  • @verakeys8912
    @verakeys8912 5 лет назад +7

    What if he broke up with me right before I was about to move to his city? I still want to move there because i used to live there and it’s a better city for my life and career. I have friends and family there. I don’t want to seem like I’m chasing him though. The fact that I’m still moving has almost forced me to leave alone the idea of getting back together with him because I don’t want to seem like I moved anyway just to try to be with him. I’m moving there for myself only now

    • @scarlett8146
      @scarlett8146 5 лет назад

      Have you ever told him you would move to his city?

    • @verakeys8912
      @verakeys8912 5 лет назад

      ZHANG Scarlett yes he knew I was going to move there. But he doesn’t know I still am following through with that

    • @carlatraini8804
      @carlatraini8804 5 лет назад +1

      @@verakeys8912 I am i the same situation: I was working on a plan to move to him, we discussed this together but when things were becoming more concrete, he decided to break up during the last time I went visiting him.
      Now my plans are moving on and I may move to his city or 2 hours far away, which would change everything for us. But I don't even know if this will interest him at this point. :(

    • @smooclothingline8216
      @smooclothingline8216 5 лет назад

      I'm going through the exact same thing my guy and I have been in a long-distance relationship for about 18 months and I finally decided that I was going to move there and then he breaks up with me it's been a week and I am feeling very devastated and Confused

    • @verakeys8912
      @verakeys8912 5 лет назад

      I wrote this 2 months ago. I no longer am moving there. Things are going great for me where I am now. It turns out the reason he left me was for another woman and they are still happily together and I don’t want him back anymore bc ive been dating guys who are better than him.

  • @erwinsmith2066
    @erwinsmith2066 8 месяцев назад +1

    I broke the no contact, asked for a 2nd chance. He took a day and stayed firm on his decision to break up. Im not sure if no contact will work. However, i am practicing no contact. However, he asked he wanted to be in touch .

  • @MelodyLovesMusic
    @MelodyLovesMusic 5 лет назад +5

    I believe it can work,if they both wanted it to.

  • @angelavoita
    @angelavoita Год назад

    I can’t believe I’d write this comment, but after 6 month he reached out to me, even being on long distance.
    Thank you to Coach Lee for saving my dignity❤ …I now know we are not for each other but staying NC is the key.
    I don’t feel like responding to him even though Coach Lee recommends to answer in general “let me know when you are in my city” - I’m not planning to 😂

  • @mcosta6423
    @mcosta6423 Год назад +3

    For me it was a little bit different. Most part of our relationship was in the same city. 5 min away from my house. Only the last 7 months of our 4 years and 6 months together. During those 7 months apart I was there every 30 days (or less) and I would stay there with her for, at least, 20-25 days. So it was not that much time away from each other. She moved to be closer to her family. She had every chance to breakup with me when she decided to move but she didn't. Also, during this period away, she found out she had a minor cancer in the uterus (she found in the beginning). But the reason she gave me during tbe breakup is that she didn't see a future on the relationship because of the way I handle finances (which I agree. I have a good job, some savings but I don't count the cents like her). Anyway... I said I wanted to move to be with her, have kids. I putted all the cards on the table for her to decide when we had the breakup. Not up to me anymore. It's been almost 5 weeks of NC. I'm not blocked on whatsapp (we both don't use social media). Wish me luck, everyone.
    P.S: I'm working on myself. Getting a better finance education, some spreadsheets to control it, working on the anxious person I became in the end of the relationship...
    Also...I'm 37 and she is 32.

    • @mrnegative7718
      @mrnegative7718 Год назад +1

      Any update bro ?

    • @mcosta6423
      @mcosta6423 Год назад

      @@mrnegative7718 Yes but not the one you probably want to read. We are not back together and we will never be. And I'm ok with that. I'm on another relationship that is WAY better than my last one. We spent 6 months in NC but I broke it in October (her bday). And we've been talking like nothing happened. Like friends again, just like how we started. I don't feel anything for her anymore. No hard feelings as well. She decided what she had to do at that point and I don't blame her. So... Yeah! Not a get back together story but a successful one for me, at least.

  • @BrutalacePSN
    @BrutalacePSN 2 года назад +1

    My Long-Distance ex-GF broke up with me 18th of December (6 years relationship), and I cried and begged for many days and asked her to be honest with her thoughts about it. We have always been honest and trusted eachother and she pointed out a few things after I desperately wanted explanations. It came as a shock for me, she has been thinking of breaking up for 6 months and didn't tell me anything, neither did she hint about it, so she tried to hold on as long she could, since she really didn't wanna leave me. But it happened, and she cried with me over the phone that she never wanted to hurt me etc. We have never ever fought or argued with eachother and had insanely good chemistry and minds. There was a few things she pointed out that made her "lose her feelings/attraction" for me and I said I am sorry and wanted to get rid of that attitude. (I might have had some strong opinions on stuff and too judgemental, but never something against her.)
    We had a focus on being healthy and tried diet and stuff, and I might have pushed her too hard on that and I said I regret taking it so seriously, that I always have been happy for who she is, no matter how her soul and body look like.
    Anyways, after I begged she was willing to have a pause to think about it, but it could take months she said, but I was too desperate and texted her 2 weeks after breakup that I wanted more clear answers.
    She said "if you want and answer now, it has to be a no. I am 100x sorry but I need to find myself, I don't feel happy anymore and no feelings for you, although I love the person you are. You are the best person I know on this planet and you have infinite good sides about yourself."
    She didn't want the same as me anymore "move into a house, live together etc" because having a relationship is a fulltime job, and she is working fulltime and is studying at the same time. She have gotten new friends (colleagues) and they hang out some times and I understand that she want that, since my emotional attraction fell. She wanted to be alone. But she says she still loves me as a person and care very much about me. She wanted us to still keep in contact since she likes me, but I said that would be very hard for me to do after having a 6 year relationship with her, so I would rather not keep you as a friend, and that I will never forget her and that I am sorry.
    The distance was never a problem though, only 1,5 hour drive and we saw eachother every month.
    1st of January I said
    "I am sorry for texting so much about it, and that we shouldn't communicate with eachother for a while, but if she has something important it is fine.
    Not only because of your sake, but I am going to spend alot of time on myself as well, make a better version of myself, both mentally and physical. And I am also sorry if you regret this in the future, maybe I don't want a relationship either when that time comes. I hope I do, but it can happen. Good luck, love you."
    She answered that it comforts her that I will work onmyself and she has everything I told her in her mind and said good luck and that she loved me as well. (not in a romantic way I guess)
    Since then, I have started No-Contact, the time moves so slow in my head. It's painful. I feel like I fucked this up completely. I discovered this channel way too late.
    @Coach Lee, your videos calms me down. Thank you. If I ever get my ex GF back I will PayPal directly to you. I watch your videos everyday.

    • @JoMama123451234
      @JoMama123451234 4 месяца назад

      Update?

    • @BrutalacePSN
      @BrutalacePSN 4 месяца назад

      @@JoMama123451234 No contact at all, but the days are going so much better now. It takes time, time is the best there is.

    • @BrutalacePSN
      @BrutalacePSN 4 месяца назад

      @@JoMama123451234 It is kinda fucked up because it all happened for no reason at all, never fought and never any toxic stuff happened in these 5 years. Proves alot that this person (ex) is not worth it. everything I done for her

  • @MagusNegi6344
    @MagusNegi6344 3 года назад +4

    How long would you say to go no contact before contacting them as per what you said on 14:10? 4 weeks (30 days)? 3 weeks? Thank you.

  • @andersm1415
    @andersm1415 4 года назад +5

    Five year ldr ended a month ago. He’s met someone who lives in the same country/city while I’ve been stuck in lockdown. Doubt there’s any chance of getting back together but would love to have the friendship and messages back.

    • @niwasazuke
      @niwasazuke 3 года назад +1

      We are in the same situation still in no contact for 1 month now

  • @candicemaxwell6282
    @candicemaxwell6282 5 лет назад +4

    We were together all the time. Lived together once even. He cheated slept with the 2 women the day I found out and left. We got back together he was 100% awesome until one day he told me to leave the house over an argument, I left in one day 2 hrs away. He grabbed another girl and went no contact with me. He did love bomb me until he found someone.

  • @sydney8216
    @sydney8216 7 месяцев назад +2

    I feel so hopeless. I’ve been in a relationship with girl for 5 years long distance from ny to Canada and it was perfect until the arguments and petty fights.. now I feel like she has lost attraction for me because of that plus distance and maybe her friends suggesting that she can do better. She’s so mean now and I feel so lost because she was my best friend now I feel like I’m dealing with this alone. and she’s throwing hints that she might be moving on to someone else but idk if it’s breadcrumb games or it’s real. She still has our pictures up everywhere but still being cold I’m so confused

  • @alicechung708
    @alicechung708 5 лет назад +6

    Thanks for this video Coach Lee :)

  • @ladyingebrigtsen3354
    @ladyingebrigtsen3354 2 года назад +2

    I literally begged my husband to assist me with paperworks so I can be a full time wife for him (not 90 days on off situations due to the limitation on my visa). Instead his response was: we’ll see, if you behave well in the next 3-6 months i’ll consider the paperworks.
    Had lots of things on my plate already due to work shifting during pandemic time, his response lead to a severe depressive episode. He could not handle that because he said the responsibilities are way too big for him to handle if there’s something happen to me.
    He asked for a separation and I said I didn’t want it. Now it’s been almost a month aince we talk to each other. I’m focusing on my recovery (physically and mentally) and getting through a lot of therapies to get over with.
    Your videos are really lighting up the days when they feel so dark for me. Thank you so much!
    Ps. I do really love your hair colour! I sent a screen capture of your hair colour to my stylist so he can give me the same hair colour in the next few weeks 😊