Who Have You Not Forgiven? | 0-100
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- Опубликовано: 4 окт 2024
- We brought in people ages 0-100 to answer some of life’s big questions. In this episode, we asked people "who have you not forgiven?" Tell us what you think in the comments below!
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"I can get rid of the anger, but it's hard to get rid of the memory." Wise answer.
Ayase Yukiya Great answer.
Slightly lower than naruto's lvl but still it was great dialogue
Forgive, but don't forget...
"I can get rid of the anger but it's hard to get rid of the memory" this.
that little 10 year old girl at 1:16 is well beyond her years. i personally need to take that advice.
Yoo they sure she 10?? 👀
I can't forgive my father because he keeps emotional abusing me. I have tried and almost did until he reverted back to his patterns. He told me directly to my face that he wasn't going to change and show me respect as a an adult. I'm done trying to live up to his standards instead I'm working to break away from his story to continue finding my own.
Thank you for sharing your story. All we can ever do is hold ourselves accountable for our own actions. I'm glad you've reflected to know what kind of person you don't want to emulate, as sad as that is. You can change the cycle. Good luck to you. Remind yourself of that example. Learn from it. :)
Grant H. He will regret and change, no matter how long it takes... everybody does i think
I can relate.
You have my respect bro!
@@CF-yr1dm not necessarily
The fact the ages aren’t in order is annoying me so much I just can’t forgive you for this @soulpancake
Should they be in chronological order? Why?
@@aestheticman2662 the question is.....why not??
@@sudhanvakashyap297 the answer is..... think out of the box.
I will never forgive myself for stepping on my dogs paw
Lol
Linda wow
Or tail
My dad.
kmbrose why ?!?
we're in this together with our dads.
kmbrose me too
Same
Same
I haven’t forgiven my abuser, or my father for allowing it to happen. One day I will, but I can’t for now.
Sunset ASMR i went through the same thing. I wrote them a letter. I never sent it, but it helped.
If "one day" ...why not now?
I haven't forgiven my brother who abused me and my sisters. My mum allowed it to happen. He abused us physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually. He's 7 years older than me.
Everyone in my family loves him.
I believe you can forgive and not forget. Sometimes it's important to remember and learn from it. I forgive but I won't let myself be put in that position again if I can help it. Trust has to be re-earned.
Jenny Richardson well said. Plus we might forgive but the other person or people may be as bitter as hell...some people just enjoy being miserable 🌺
Agreed. And what about the opposite? Forgetting, but not forgiving. Do you think you can try to forget wrongs people have done without actually forgiving them for what they did?
I've never forgiven a former friend for outing me in school. As much as I feel better and more confident now that everyone knows I'm gay, I can't let go of the fact that she took away my choice to stay closeted, I wasn't ready at the time but had no choice for everyone to know because of her 😕
Alice Evonic Please stop. You have no right to tell someone how to feel emotions. If they felt uncomfortable, they are uncomfortable. Just because you had a different experience doesn’t mean everyone else has one like yours.
Alice Evonic learn you’re grammar and spelling first
shooketh teaspiller it’s learn **your** grammar, sis 😂😂
That Really struck a nerve. I (my husband & I) had a group of friends for years, we got them into a club we belonged to & slowly my (what I thought was my best friend) turned everyone against us & we didn't see Anyone after that. @ years later my husband died & I never heard from ANY of them. Much more there but, it's hard to let go when you don't know WHY!!!!!
Carol Tassin something like this happened in our friends group when we were in class 10. A new boy came and turned all us against each other and we all were friends since childhood. Now even if we meet we still have grudges against each other.
that last part rings true. i've never been able to forgive the man who sexually harassed me, making me afraid of anything to do with that entire gender. we just stopped talking, and i hope he's grown from it like i did, but every time i see his name or see an old friend hanging out with him, i get absolutely sick to my stomach. despite going through years of mental illness, i think that was the worst thing to happen to me in terms of self esteem.
rebekah schroeder I'm in the exact same boat. I can't hear his name without feeling sick.
Meagan Potts we're stronger than them
I’d never forgiven my father for leaving me and hurting my mom and I never forgave my friend for something she did to me which really hurt me. I love to hear these stories and I am so thankful to be one of the few people who saw this.
The 10 year old is such an old soul. Also how do all the 30 yr olds look younger than the 20 year olds?
I don't think there is a definite definition of forgiveness, it's individual to each and everyone of us.
P.s
I am so glad and thankful that they have the happy music at the end!
The 10 year old bullied girl is wise way beyond her years..
The people I don't forgive are those that pretend that nothing ever happened and never hold themselves accountable, always deflecting the blame. I wish I was a troublemaker growing up so the imprint sticks in peoples' minds because right now I'm just too grown to raise issues up - they just pretend!
I see where you're coming from. But I've found that the people who don't apologise, who refuse responsibility for their impact on others- they're the ones who it's most helpful to forgive. It's easy to forgive a sorry person, but the person who isn't sorry has the ability to hurt us so much more, if we don't work on forgiving them. You can live with some pains- but I've found the pain of anger, frustration and injustice can only be healed with forgiveness. It's not about letting them off the hook, it's about not carrying the weight of anger.
Don't forgive people if they don't deserve it. Handing out your forgiveness to someone that isn't sorry is giving them the easy way out and they don't learn anything.
Regardless of what people say, you can move on without forgiving them. You can be at peace without that.
i dont believe so, how can u move on without finishing off loose ends. You gotta atleast try to forgive and before you move on.
I totally agree! I'm the type of person that definitely feels like you never have to forgive someone if they don't deserve it too. You can just keep the memory of the situation, learn from it and move on and be just fine! LOL
Most of the time the other person doesn't care about your forgiveness anyways. I personally feel that being angry and hurt is exhausting and robbing me of life quality, so I choose to forgive them not for their peace of mind, but for my own. I know that it's difficult to let go of the anger because it feels like they get away with what they've done. But let's be honest, they already did. At this point you're anger doesn't hurt them, it's only hurting yourself.
I had to deal with forgiveness recently and upon reading up about it to heal, and move on, I learned something really important about forgiveness. I try to think about it when it comes to hurt me again or attack me again.
“Forgiveness is not a feeling, but a choice.”
Sometimes the hurt will keep attacking us, and in those times we feel, “oh how can I let it go, I don’t *feel* ready to forgive.” Or sometimes “when I think about it I’m still *hurt*, so I can’t forgive them.”
Feelings come and go, they’re not a strong foundation to build relationships on, but making conscious choices can anchor your decisions even when you’re the most emotional.
But to make it clear it’s just like being stabbed. It’s gonna hurt for sure, but once you take that knife out will you be able to heal. You can touch the wound it inflicted and still feel the pain. You will always remember the memory, the scars will always stick with you, but you made the choice to pull the knife out. Despite the pain, and emotions, you choose to heal and nothing will stop that healing process if you stick to your decision. But trying to feel anger from it again is like stabbing yourself again. Trying to find answers is just stabbing your self again. Trying to make the other person pay is just stabbing yourself again. Those are all choices you make as you heal. But wounds will always close, and the pain will fade. The memory will stick with you, but you have chosen to be stronger.
But until you take that knife out and drop it, you will never fully heal. You can learn to live with it, but the wound will never get any better.
And an even bigger obstacle is trying to not use that knife to hurt the other person. Don’t use your “hurt” to hurt others. No matter how much you think they “deserve it”.
It was a tough lesson to learn. It was tough to forgive and no longer expect them to apologize or to “make it up to me”. But making that decision on my own made me feel stronger and freer from the burden. And in turn it leaves the other person in a spot where they have to make the choice too. And if they couldn’t, then that was their choice to keep the knife. But if they want to take it out then I would help them and we could heal together. Obviously I won’t push them to ya forgive me right away. Admitting it to yourself and finally coming to terms with it takes time. But all of us have been in situations where we have made giant mistakes and ones we can’t even bounce back from, no matter how hard we try. (It’s hard when the other person is so unforgiving and won’t give you a chance) But once the person forgives you and you can forgive yourself for making mistakes as a human, can both of us move on. And it doesn’t necessarily mean to be best friends after. But just respecting that they are human too and dropping that connection with no hard feelings.
I’m still struggling with it, but I’ve come to be able to be at peace knowing it was my choice to forgive. That my emotions won’t dictate me. It still hurts, but it’s better for me. Holding on to it just feels like I was cradling that resentment and anger. In my mind I still feel a bit of anger, but it’s almost like an old memory now.
Beautifully said ❤️
Not forgiving someone is like taking a poison and expecting the other person to die from it.
Julie L how beautifully said❤️
At Home With Nika Thanks! I know forgiving can be difficult but it hurts you more than the other person...
Julie L sometimes you can try over and over to forgive someone, but at the end of the day you still have negative feelings towards them.
Kaylee B Yes that's true unfortunately. I've had to forgive someone who did really bad things to me and yes I am still sad when I think about what that person did but I mostly feel bad for him. After all those years I sort of detached myself from those events, I put them behind me. I try to not let them and that person affect me anymore.
Julie L not really
Oh def, I will hold a grudge until the day I die.
Monica Fontaine same, my family always called me the grudge too lol
Sometimes I think yes, but the memories just strikes me back and there I'm hating that person again.
I haven’t forgiven my ex bestfriend. We had been friends for about 12 years, and at one point I had been dating a guy for 1 year and a half and I wasn’t completely happy in the relationship, so since she was my bestfriend I’d vent to her sometimes, and she always motivated me to break up with the guy saying that he was a horrible bf and that I deserved someone better etc. After some time I did eventually beak up with him, not because of her obviously, and since I started college I started seeing her less often. To summarize, she started dating him without even telling me, and I only found out about a month later and in the meantime she talked to me as if this wasn’t happening. She never even tried to talk to me, so technically she threw away our friendship of over 12 years and even though she hasn’t apologized, I can’t forgive her for what she did.
Isabella Pezzato That’s a devious ‘friend’. Stay far away.
TiaB I agree and have completely removed her from my life.
Isabella Pezzato This is a troll^^. Don’t feed it!
Some of the people in this video seem to think that they haven’t truly forgiven someone if they still remember the anger they felt for being wronged. Forgiving and forgetting are two separate things. Nobody expects you to forget, but forgiving is always the best option (at least in my experience). If you are still angry at someone about something, you probably haven’t forgiven that person, but just remembering anger is not holding a grudge.
I'm surprised that nobody mentioned not forgiving themselves. Or am I the only one that can't forgive myself? 😕
Well to be honest, I don't know what forgiven means but with my ex, I talk to her sometimes, don't hold any grudge against her, I wish her all the best in her life. But do I want to get back with her? Big NO.
The Brown Guy Traveling Bless U
I think it's okay to not forgive sometimes and I am really grateful for the platform this video (and channel) provides to get stuff like that of your chest. It is always nice to know that you are not alone. Like a lot of people here I have a difficult parent-child relationship or non-relationship for that matter and although I've let go of the anger, that was just hurting myself, recent events showed me that I might never be able to forgive her. My mother - among other things - kept me from my beloved grandparents when I was younger and now that my grandmother had a terribly fast case of dementia and died last week, I am hurting so much. I miss her so much, I miss the person she was before that horrible disease came and I am so incredibly sad, that I missed several years when she was the wonderful grandma I knew because of my mother. My mother did other things to me, let other things happen that might seem worse if you compare it, but this hurts so much right now. I'm not angry anymore, but I'm nowhere close to forgiveness, I might never be. A great hug and thank you to everyone sharing their stories about forgiveness or the lack of.
What a great honest, and real video. Glad this is being brought up and spoken about. I really liked seeing different people from different experiences and walks of life all together in this. One group of people not represented I just noticed though, which may be considered in the future, is people with disabilities. Thanks so much for this!
I can't forgive myself for all the pain I caused to me and my family when I was at my teens. Now that I'm older, I can understand better. I was a very difficult kid, stubborn, crying when I couldn't get what I wanted, I was gonna run away from home, I made my father so angry that he had to hit me,multiple times. I can't forgive myself for falling to depression. I can't forgive myself for trying to take my own life. I'm careless with a big ego and even though I know what's wrong, I don't do anything to change it. I can't forgive myself for letting those bullies harass me daily and not doing anything to prevent it. I can't forgive myself for so many things, and I'm only 21. The worst part is that I know that I won't be able to move on if I just don't let it all go. It's hard, but I owe it to my family. They deserve to have a healthy, nice, happy, kid,who loves them more than anything in this world,but most of all, I know I deserve to be happy. Everyone does. But Sometimes, some of us, have to try a little harder to obtain that..
Αnnα Suντ You can do it! Please try. I’ve found that forgiveness is easier than not.
Continuing to be so hard on yourself is like poisoning yourself, slowly. You’ll stay sick. You sound like an intelligent person. You’ve admitted your faults to yourself and us. Finish the process, and allow yourself to heal. That’s all, just decide to heal. You’ll be so glad you did. The people in your life will be, too. 😊
Myself, more than anything. I'm at the point where I know that if I want to make a difference and try being happy again, I need to forgive myself first.
When she said "my brain says move on, but my heart is still hurting"... I felt that
Sometimes it's just ignoring the pain cause you can't face the truth and confusing it with forgiveness.
My mother...... “I can get rid of the anger but it’s hard to get rid or the memory” thank you
That girl who is 19 has so many ex boyfriends I swear that in every video that I watched so far she talked about her boyfriends or exes 😂😂😂😂😂
My first year I was moved out of my family home, was also one of the most traumatic times in my life. One of my roommates at the time had went on a drug binge after breaking up with his girlfriend, then one night he had a cocktail of drugs and he went insane, hammering on my door, yelling non sensical threats, eventually tries to break my door down to kill me and my dog, we escaped and tried running but he grabbed my dog and started choking and biting him, I react like a owner and start stomping on the back of his head until he let go, while running I called 911 as he chased us with a knife, he was arrested, released when he was sober, and then tried to come after me again for calling the police. He disappeared after that, but it took years to get over the PTSD, I will never forget or forgive what he did.
36 is my favourite person
I cannot forgive the person who almost got me sent to jail for something I did not do. I also cannot forgive the person who stole a few thousand dollars from me and lied about it. I have tried to forgive and let it go but it is very difficult for me.
msrjjon feel the same.
you gotta forgive bro, its only hurting yourself more than its hurting anyone else. I with you the best of luck tho.
Carrie Hew exactly!
You don't understand how relieving it felt to hear someone be able to say "my mom"
I believe that forgiveness is a constant and ever changing process. You don’t just forgive someone and it’s over. It’s not just a one and done situation. You wake up everyday and you make a constant choice to not let that other person or situation win over your happiness by not forgiving them. It’s like living, you put your feet on the ground each day and you make a decision to keep doing it.. and you do it for as long as you’re alive.
this brought up so much emotions from me. Its crazy how you can suppress a memory or past hurt, yet when reminded you find out you haven't let it go or forgiven. Another wonderful masterpiece, thank you
I had held a grudge against my childhood bullies for years. I realized there were many factors at play as I grew older. Many of my bullies were also bullied themselves, and many were actually nice guys when i ran into them outside of school growing up. As an adult I tracked some of them down and spoke with some of them, apologized for the things I did wrong too and forgave them. When you realize how many factors are at play in each persons behavior and the various things that may have led to them acting out it becomes hard to not forgive others. You can only have true peace when you are able to have compassion, even for your "enemies".
My old friend, I had a conversation that we needed to leave, she had givin me depression and anxiety, that I still have. Keep in mind that she still thinks that we are friends and has done so much more to me than many could think of doing. She and my ex cyber bullied me, she told me I was ugly and that I didn't deserve to live. This has gone on from 4th grade (which is when I hated myself so much that I didn't want to live anymore) till now. She believes that I have forgiven her, but I don't think I ever will. This has gone on throughout so many breakups and so many bad things where she turned against me and neglects to fight for just ONE THING FOR ME, EVEN THOUG I DID SO MUCH FOR HER. I just can never get over it.
You can't carry that pain in your heart every day. I'm still living with the repercussions of things people have said and done to me, but i forgive them because it's my way to move on and let go. They're still stuck in the past, but i have a long life ahead of me that i won't taint with past scars.
2:23 thank you so much I really needed that 💕
Forgiving isnt about forgetting, but is that the memory won't cause you pain anymore
I refuse to waste my life not forgiving people. I try my best to not hurt anyone but I know that it’s part of life. My hope is that people will forgive me when I make mistakes. I have forgiven even the deepest and most difficult things and will continue to forgive.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to allow certain people in your life. Sometimes forgiveness means moving forward with no bitterness or ill will towards someone
.
Secret video!!! Yes
😉😉
no fair
forgiveness is something that my heart never got to practice.. and so is my ancestors'.. i have a lot of people i haven't forgiven.
36 is my person too, love to all of you people
There's plenty of people in my life who have done some damage, but I've always forgiven them when they deserve to be, or when I feel like I should move on, it's a lot of pain being felt towards people who don't deserve a part of you. I''m grateful my mom taught me how important it is to forgive at such an early age.
Aw man this really got to me.
My dad; he was never there when I needed him the most
Yes, myself
HOW DOES THIS ONLY HAVE 2,000 views?!
Mini303 it says it’s only been uploaded two hours ago but how come your comments from 5 days ago
Wat??? Ur comment says 5 days ago but this was uploaded today?
Sakari's Edits it was unlisted
Forgiveness is earned. And you should only forgive when you are ready, not out of obligation.
In my 20’s I got scammed out of my life savings. It was about 70k. It’s hard to move on when you occasionally still see the people involved.
For me the after sometime feelings of anger, bitterness, hurt, love they all die at one point including that person. It doesn't matter anymore. What remains is an empty soul and body
This one is interesting because I think people sometimes confuse forgiveness with trust. I'm not angry with my dad for what he did, but I don't trust him enough to let him back into my life.
yes. but I think in a couple years, when it's been a longer time and i'm not as fucked up over it, I will. they'll never gain my trust again though, I don't think I'll be able to give them that again..
There were three people at seperate times who stressed me a bit and helped make me have a seizure... My family was affected and I can't forgive them if they ever apologize to me... One was a friend, other was his boyfriend and lastly was this manager I worked with....
Yes, only because I’m extremely ill, and refuse to keep toxic people in my life, as it would only make me sicker if I didn’t.
There's several people in my life that I'm not forgiving and I don't dwell on it. I'm not going to forgive them. They did not ask for forgiveness.
I learned 20 some years ago that my life is a bubble and there are those that I choose to allow into my bubble and there are those who do not belong in my bubble and once I realize that I have to let them go and I'm better for it because not all people are compatible no matter how much you try, whether that be a platonic love or romantic love.
I love the guy at 0:57 who always gives non-serious answers
Yes, one person I have not forgiven is my mother. I've accepted her in my life several time and every time she had hurt me and I just had enough. It feels as though my mother wants my forgiveness so she doesn't feel like the bad person. Though she's hurt me I still love her but I have to keep my distance.
1:09 gonna see what he's feeling, what he's not
36 is so articulate, I love her
I (had) a friend that was autisitic and he always got angry at me and hit me but society was pretty much encouraging me to not to stop being friends with him because he was autistic. Once he beat me up badly then pushed me in a puddle. Didn't get in trouble cuz his mum came in and said that I told him to beat me up. He also cut another of my friends in the head, called a kid fat, shouted the f word, threw a chair at me and he never got punished. When me and my friends mentioned it to others WE GOT IN TROUBLE. I hate him now and will never forgive him. Rant closed
I love this channel. What an amazing topic you guys have chosen.. I love all the videos. N i can actually see the effort and time the people of this channel has put into it. Amazing job !
Why should you forgive them when they're not deserving of forgiveness? I mean, they don't even feel sorry for the wrong things they did to us. Forgiveness is like trust, it has to be earned!
How did I find this secret video and why is it unlisted anyway?
I Write A Song A Day woah. it says it’s only been uploaded 2 hours ago
Hi. I have a close friend that was murdered. So, to the woman in the video that lost a brother in the same way, first, I am so sorry and I admire you so much, and second, which steps did you take to heal? It is really, really hard. Greetings
Seelenpfannkuchen...
N. Sc. Lol
Can u pls put it in order
Forgive but don't forget that way you know how people really are and you don't have to spend your time being angry at the world
I’m having trouble forgiving my parents for treating me the way they did. They claim they raised me right and gave me everything, but the emotional aspect was lacking, and they forced me to be fearful of and intimidated by them every time I misbehaved through hitting, slapping, spanking, and sugarcoat it and call it “discipline”. When I mentioned this to them they claimed it “wasn’t that bad”. The belt-shaped scars on my butt say otherwise. And that’s why I’m cutting them off wine I move out.
I can forgive a person, but i will never forget what you did to me thats how i feel about it but everyone is different
A toxic friend I had that made me think that getting rid of people that I’ve known for years, then she stopped socializing with me because I wouldn’t abide by her rules. She played with my feelings and caused me to regain the depression that I’d thought has quieted down. I let her back into my life constantly and she stole people from me and turned them against me. I stayed oblivious to this until I decided to tell her about my mental state and she made a joke out of it. I kept making an effort to keep her as a friend and she ended up ignoring me and acting as if I wasn’t there. I don’t hate her, but there’s a part of me that gives her 1/3 of the blame for manipulating me the way she did. I take 2/3 because I know all I had to do was walk away, but I had so little friends that I clinged to who I had. Idk that was long... sorry. 😐
I have not forgiven:
*myself*
My answer is myself, and probably I should start working on that.
Way of life: forgive but not forget.
There's a boy at my school and I feel like it's his only mission to systematically destroy my life. Way back in year five and six it used to be much worse, he'd follow me and call me names, but now, in year 11, it still kind of is a thing. We have a few classes together and I feel like I end up with him in almost every group project- it's terrible. He really does everything to make me look stupid in front of everyone. A few weeks back I told him it's people like him who cause others to commit suicide. Of course he just laughed at me, but I truly hope it made him think.
Forgiveness, can you imagine?
I’m a very emotional person and I’ve been bullied for 8 years. I’ve forgiven them many times but it always kept happening. I’m working really hard on trying to forgive them. For myself. It’s just really difficult because it was such a big part of my life and of course it wasn’t that long ago
Forgiveness is the willingness to let go of sth that hurt you.Definitely not an easy thing to do.
Awe it's this kid again!
2:13 :"0 such wisdom
I haven't forgiven my bullies who caused me so much trauma, the boy who abused me or the father who left. And sometimes people dont deserve forgiveness.
You don’t have to forgive the people who hurt you. Sometimes recognizing your anger and letting it go, doesn’t involving forgiveness for that person but for yourself. I was sexually abused and I’ll never forgive them, but I forgive myself for being so angry and depressed afterwards. Happiness tip: let the little things make you outrageously happy, be grateful for the little things. It took a few years but it helped me. Maybe it can help you too.
There are a lot of people I haven't forgiven, for a lot of reasons. One that jumps out at me is someone who used to be my best friend. We had a fight over something really stupid, when I was honest with her and she got mad at me for it, and after that she made friends with this guy I really hate, and when she came over to try to patch things up in our friendship, she told me that she made bets with him about how long my relationship at the time was going to last. I haven't talked to her since, and I'm glad. For the record, she bet three months. It lasted for thirteen.
That's such a shitty "friend". Glad you didn't take her back into your life, some people are not worth it.
i will always forgive but that doesn’t mean i don’t forget
When I was 5 I caught my mother trying to abandon me and my brother. I stood there and talked her out of leaving. I will never forgive myself for stopping her. I would have been so much better off without her.
As i see some people don't forgive really simple things. I don't forgive someone because he did something that made me cry everyday for almost a year. But i still hope i can find the power to forgive him...
My husband, for leaving us.
I was a huge jerk to a bunch of people when I was younger. I want to apologize, but I just can't bring myself to do it, like I can't face them, and expecting them to forgive me is selfish. Like how can a few words make up for years of hurt?
❤❤02:17-02:30
Heiki Ka ❤️
2:57 ~ That's it!
My dad. My step dad. My next door neighbor. My two ex best friends. My elementary teachers. My first boss. The management at my second job. Myself.
HOLY CRAP THE TEN YEAR OLD GIRL LOOKS TOO MUCH LIKE BAILEE MADISON!
Sevval THANK U FINALLY SOMEONE MENTIONED IT, i was scrolling through the comments to see if anyone noticed
"I was actually looking for a woodo doll at some point in my life"
Im dead 😂 you go boy
every time man, these videos make my eyes so watery... Do u guys have a dedicated team of onion cutters cutting onions upon each view? T_T
But thank you guys, for asking such real questions to not just these people in the video but to us all.