Her father is a hot mess. He doesn't want to believe OP at all because, ultimately, it makes him look like a failure as a parent because he was obvious to her pain. I'm loving Sunny, though. She's a boss.
From what I know of parents from African countries. They would usualy rather suffer for all of time, rather than hurt their pride so I think that's what's happening
EDIT: My comment got deleted when I added a link to the reddit post, so here is the summary of the updates after the video ends. Original post is titled: I'm not going to be the MOH for my Sister's Wedding because she's marrying my bully. This is in the r/AITAH subreddit. I read the rest of the updates so far. To summarize, the whole family had a group video call afterwards controlled by the mom. Mom managed to drag more truth out of people, Violet was upset but still blamed OP. Dad still blamed OP saying it was her fault for "lying by omission" and not telling him that she cut herself. The eldest brother also blamed her while all the other brothers took her side. Her friend Sunny, took over the call when Daniel tried to pretend that he wasnt at fault and she laid out very clearly what happened to OP making him sort of confess a little but playing it off. Mom took OPs side and said she had just believed the Dad, because OP had shut down and wouldnt talk to her which she took as an admission of guilt. OP then went to therapy and told her Dad she was going low contact and Dad tried to impose his own rules on it and OP told him no. Violet also blocked OP still blaming her and saying "shes not the person she used to know". EDIT 9/3/24: OP gave another update 2 hours before this edit. The two brothers on her side saw Daniel at a bar and he tried to act friendly with them but the youngest brother barely prevented the older one from assaulting him. OP went on a small vacation with her friend Sunny to a big city and was contacted by Daniel about this incident, blaming OP for it. OP reached out to brothers to talk about it and they told OP what happened. They also mentioned that the Dad figured out he had been blocked but the brothers refused to pass messages to OP. Violet also discovered that OP had blocked her in return and that made her cry, despite Violet having blocked OP first. EDIT 9/11/2024: OP gave an update 12 hours before this edit. After coming home from their vacation, OP saw that Daniel, her bully, had tried to contact her 20 times over the 3 days, and her sister Violet, 7 times. Daniel called OP a coward for not talking it out and Violet sent crying messages about how she will leave Daniel if OP wants but also accusing OP of causing her harm and blaming her for their Mom refusing to attend the wedding. Also said that the reason the wedding was even on hold was because their Mom refused to pay anymore. Violet also said some very hurtful things to OP before ending the message. OP shared these messages in the family group chat, unblocking her father and oldest brother to do so. OP's father responded by accusing OP of lying about self harm and that he wasn't serious about his earlier statement of not wanting to be her father anymore and accusing OP of being desperate for attention. The father said some unsavory things in the group chat which he unsent later, but OP had screenshot all of them before he did. OP responded with a long text crafted by her and her friends reiterating her abuse by Daniel and confirming she was not going to be a part of the wedding. OP also set boundaries and stated she will go NC if she needs to for her mental health. The oldest brother called OP after she sent that text, apologizing for being a jerk saying he got defensive because his wife is having another baby soon. OP forgave him but let him know it would take a long time to trust him again. OP will be returning to work in the classroom soon and has received supportive messages from staff and students. OP is still going to group therapy sessions which have been mediocre. OP states that they still have urges to self harm but they are mild and are coping well with supportive friends. OP ends by stating her father is blocked again and seems resigned that he made his choice. EDIT 9/16/2024: OP posted in a different subreddit to get advice about going NC with their father and sister about 4 hours before this edit. OP is asking for advice on how to go NC with their Dad and sis since she has been finding it very difficult given that she always used to talk to them daily, despite how poorly she's was treated by them. Her parents are separated right now as well and the rest of the family have joined OP in going NC or LC with sister and Dad. OP mentioned that her dad managed to find her on several apps he never knew about before like Discord, to message her, and has been threatening to fly over and show up unannounced. Dad also texted OP's best friend who said it was some "weird half ass apology". OP has decided to not read the text for now. EDIT 9/23/2024: OP posted an update 14 hours before this edit. OP's Mom is very focused on being with her right now. Also, one of her brothers discovered this story on one of the many story channels and sent it to her, which she verified was her story. The brother was sad at hearing how all of this was affecting OP and they ended up talking on the phone about it while OP's mom was in the room so they drank and cried together. This got them to begin having a deep conversation. OP's mom confessed to having severe PPD after giving birth to OP and Violet, her sister. OP's mom explained that when they were feeding as babies, OP was fussy whenever she wasn't being held by Mom including when OP's dad tried to hold her. This started the dad not liking OP, even though she was just a baby. Then OP's mom confessed a bombshell, the dad has been cheating for a very long time and has 4 other children with this other woman who happened to be a teacher at OP's school. After discovering this, OP's mom kicked him out. OP's dad said that because OP's mom was away all the time for work, or pregnant, or dealing with PPD from the pregnancies, that he was owed this and that he had needs that she wasn't providing him. OP's mom said that he had never said there was any problems and gave him 6 kids, so many in fact it made her unable to have more kids, which is one of the reasons OP's dad said was part of the problem. Both OP's mom and dad came from very large families, so OP's dad "only" had 6 kids and wanted more because it shamed him to have such a small family and for the mom to be the main provider instead of him. Then he said that Violet had known about all of this around age 11, had met their other siblings, and even started to cover for him when she got older. OP's mom stopped the conversation at this point and told OP to not worry about her and apologized for dumping this all on her. OP's mom told her that she reminded her of OP's grandmother which OP took as a major compliment. OP is struggling with feelings of hate now towards her dad and sister. EDIT 9/30/2024: OP actually has two more updates. I will summarize them both here: OP forgot that her Reddit posts were seen by one of her brothers, who found out about their father's infidelity by reading OP's updates. One of the brothers confronted him about it, causing OP's father to call OP's mother and scream at her for it. OP recorded it because of how intense it was and OP's mom let him rant and hung up when he was done. OP's mom messaged the family to apologize for not telling them all sooner about their father cheating on her and she explained everything. OP also sent the recording of their father screaming and calling their mother names. This caused the rest of the siblings, except the sister who already knew, to go NC and be done with him. OP's mother initially cried thinking she broke the family, but then came around after being consoled by OP, declared she is getting a divorce, and they went drinking together for a while, bar hopping. OP's brothers crafted a text to Violet, the sister, and informed her that they are not attending her wedding either and that she can keep their father to herself as she and him "made their choices". This caused OP's sister to have a breakdown and blame OP for breaking her heart and the family and then proceeded to defend their father's affair while blaming and berating their mother. OP's sister also claims to have suffered a miscarriage as a result of the stress, though no one is sure if she was ever actually pregnant. She also threatened to kill herself and so their mother called the non emergency police line to do a wellness check, which got her sent to the psych ward for a psychiatric hold. No one knows where Daniel, OP's sister's fiancé, is during this. The sister is begging for the brothers to come and they all refused. The sister is trying to leave the psych ward but she is not being released and their father came to try and sign stuff to get her released. OP returned to work and said she is an art teacher. She was inundated by hugs and cards from students and co-workers when she returned which made her very happy. She was also sent many nice pictures and drawings made by students to her email. OP's mother is flying home now making OP a little sad but realizes its necessary. OP's new medication is helping now though they cannot having any alcohol which they lament. SECOND UPDATE: OP's father sent an email to her work email, the only place he wasn't blocked. In it, OP's father once again blames her for not being the one to open up to him and claimed to always have been there for her. He also defended his cheating by saying his affair partner was a "wonderful woman" and claiming her mother was not always there to take care of his needs despite taking care of them financially and that OP will learn that a man has needs when she finds one. He also suggested OP take a DNA test, and suggested that their mother cheated as well on her work trips and they may not even be related. He then tries to gaslight her into saying he has always been the good guy and OP has become selfish and manipulative like her mother. He said he expects OP to block him again, the cowards way out. Then said it was just like her "cutting" for the attention she already had.
I’m sorry but every time someone has told me “he’s just picking on you because he likes you” has ended so bad. One of them brought weapons to school…on the same bus I was on…you can’t tell me it’s not bs
I got told that a while mob of bullies has crushes on me and THAT'S why they decided to push me down a flight of stairs and chase me with bats 🙃 all 20 of them now have thriving lives and I now have ptsd 😅
As it turns out it is only OP's father and sister who are truly horrible and the rest are just heavily damaged. For context: The dad is ab*sive emotionally and only physically with the oldest (who from my understanding was from the mothers previous relationship). He also believes "real men" should have multiple wives and that OP's mother was lucky to have him. Yes he cheated and has 4 other children with a teacher form OP's high school. He also knew the sister and bully were dating even though they "weren't supposed to be because grades should be their focus". He didn't intervene with the bullying because it would have disrupted his "golden daughter" The sister was actively dating the bully during high school and had him bully her to impress her because he was a love sick puppy dog. She knew about the affair from age 11 and has a relationship with the other woman and her kids. She hates OP because she was the moms "favorite" and that is why she had her puppy dog bully OP.
Ops father is a basket case of disappointment. I have so many words to describe how much of a terrible father he is. If this was a AITA post Daniel, Ops parents would definitely get 5/5, while Ops sister would get 4.5/5. There’s not enough time in the day to describe Ops parents and her sister, but they’re the worst.
The thing is you know that that sort of man will eventually be hurting OP's sister. He has a violent narcissistic streak and when things get tough in his marriage, or the sister puts on weight in pregnancy, all hell will break loose. I know what its like to be the DND/gaming girl in a jock family. It's tough because we are usually much more sensitive than those who got everything handed to them on a platter. They don't understand how hard it is to live our lives, even though you love them so much. I'm now close to my family but it took about 15 years of asserting my personality to them to realise it's not just a phase. Be true to yourself OP and keep close with your brothers that believe you. Also tell them, or your Mum why you acted out as a kid. How you never felt loved or wanted by them. My Mum used to constantly tell me that raising me was exhausting and she shouldn't have had another child. It hurts so much. I know she loved me but when you hear that your whole life as a "cute anecdote" it makes you not wanted. Good luck girl. It's impressive that you are an international DM! Mad respect as that is so hard. ❤❤
The father is a the biggest AH OF A PARENT IVE EVER READ ON REDDIT!!! Really ur gonna believe a dude that is sticking his "worm" into the other twin he could manipulate and now the dude is doing the same thing to the father
MY EXACT THOUGHTS but as it turns out the sister knew and encouraged the bullying and the bully did it to impress her. The dad also did nothing because it would interfere with his golden child's relationship. The sister hated OP because she was "mom's favorite" which the mother didn't play favorites from my understanding of the reddit posts. Also the dad hates OP because OP would only be calm and not fussy when the mom help her when they were babies.
Your father is the worst and that liar who who hurt you is the worst a person can act like q victum while he is a beast who hurts hurts and never cares your momis the best what your dad did the worst not beleaving you
I can't listen to this, the way it's worded gives me a headache!🤬 Just tell the damn story without like, 'like jumpin all ova the fsmn place, like ya know?'
![Quando Rondo - Grow Up [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/8zFnCg3BO4Q/mqdefault.jpg)
Her father is a hot mess. He doesn't want to believe OP at all because, ultimately, it makes him look like a failure as a parent because he was obvious to her pain. I'm loving Sunny, though. She's a boss.
The father is a failure. Plain and simple. And he’s taking the cowards way out.
From what I know of parents from African countries. They would usualy rather suffer for all of time, rather than hurt their pride so I think that's what's happening
EDIT: My comment got deleted when I added a link to the reddit post, so here is the summary of the updates after the video ends. Original post is titled: I'm not going to be the MOH for my Sister's Wedding because she's marrying my bully. This is in the r/AITAH subreddit.
I read the rest of the updates so far. To summarize, the whole family had a group video call afterwards controlled by the mom. Mom managed to drag more truth out of people, Violet was upset but still blamed OP. Dad still blamed OP saying it was her fault for "lying by omission" and not telling him that she cut herself. The eldest brother also blamed her while all the other brothers took her side. Her friend Sunny, took over the call when Daniel tried to pretend that he wasnt at fault and she laid out very clearly what happened to OP making him sort of confess a little but playing it off. Mom took OPs side and said she had just believed the Dad, because OP had shut down and wouldnt talk to her which she took as an admission of guilt. OP then went to therapy and told her Dad she was going low contact and Dad tried to impose his own rules on it and OP told him no. Violet also blocked OP still blaming her and saying "shes not the person she used to know".
EDIT 9/3/24: OP gave another update 2 hours before this edit. The two brothers on her side saw Daniel at a bar and he tried to act friendly with them but the youngest brother barely prevented the older one from assaulting him. OP went on a small vacation with her friend Sunny to a big city and was contacted by Daniel about this incident, blaming OP for it. OP reached out to brothers to talk about it and they told OP what happened. They also mentioned that the Dad figured out he had been blocked but the brothers refused to pass messages to OP. Violet also discovered that OP had blocked her in return and that made her cry, despite Violet having blocked OP first.
EDIT 9/11/2024: OP gave an update 12 hours before this edit. After coming home from their vacation, OP saw that Daniel, her bully, had tried to contact her 20 times over the 3 days, and her sister Violet, 7 times. Daniel called OP a coward for not talking it out and Violet sent crying messages about how she will leave Daniel if OP wants but also accusing OP of causing her harm and blaming her for their Mom refusing to attend the wedding. Also said that the reason the wedding was even on hold was because their Mom refused to pay anymore. Violet also said some very hurtful things to OP before ending the message. OP shared these messages in the family group chat, unblocking her father and oldest brother to do so. OP's father responded by accusing OP of lying about self harm and that he wasn't serious about his earlier statement of not wanting to be her father anymore and accusing OP of being desperate for attention. The father said some unsavory things in the group chat which he unsent later, but OP had screenshot all of them before he did. OP responded with a long text crafted by her and her friends reiterating her abuse by Daniel and confirming she was not going to be a part of the wedding. OP also set boundaries and stated she will go NC if she needs to for her mental health. The oldest brother called OP after she sent that text, apologizing for being a jerk saying he got defensive because his wife is having another baby soon. OP forgave him but let him know it would take a long time to trust him again. OP will be returning to work in the classroom soon and has received supportive messages from staff and students. OP is still going to group therapy sessions which have been mediocre. OP states that they still have urges to self harm but they are mild and are coping well with supportive friends. OP ends by stating her father is blocked again and seems resigned that he made his choice.
EDIT 9/16/2024: OP posted in a different subreddit to get advice about going NC with their father and sister about 4 hours before this edit. OP is asking for advice on how to go NC with their Dad and sis since she has been finding it very difficult given that she always used to talk to them daily, despite how poorly she's was treated by them. Her parents are separated right now as well and the rest of the family have joined OP in going NC or LC with sister and Dad. OP mentioned that her dad managed to find her on several apps he never knew about before like Discord, to message her, and has been threatening to fly over and show up unannounced. Dad also texted OP's best friend who said it was some "weird half ass apology". OP has decided to not read the text for now.
EDIT 9/23/2024: OP posted an update 14 hours before this edit. OP's Mom is very focused on being with her right now. Also, one of her brothers discovered this story on one of the many story channels and sent it to her, which she verified was her story. The brother was sad at hearing how all of this was affecting OP and they ended up talking on the phone about it while OP's mom was in the room so they drank and cried together. This got them to begin having a deep conversation. OP's mom confessed to having severe PPD after giving birth to OP and Violet, her sister. OP's mom explained that when they were feeding as babies, OP was fussy whenever she wasn't being held by Mom including when OP's dad tried to hold her. This started the dad not liking OP, even though she was just a baby. Then OP's mom confessed a bombshell, the dad has been cheating for a very long time and has 4 other children with this other woman who happened to be a teacher at OP's school. After discovering this, OP's mom kicked him out. OP's dad said that because OP's mom was away all the time for work, or pregnant, or dealing with PPD from the pregnancies, that he was owed this and that he had needs that she wasn't providing him. OP's mom said that he had never said there was any problems and gave him 6 kids, so many in fact it made her unable to have more kids, which is one of the reasons OP's dad said was part of the problem. Both OP's mom and dad came from very large families, so OP's dad "only" had 6 kids and wanted more because it shamed him to have such a small family and for the mom to be the main provider instead of him. Then he said that Violet had known about all of this around age 11, had met their other siblings, and even started to cover for him when she got older. OP's mom stopped the conversation at this point and told OP to not worry about her and apologized for dumping this all on her. OP's mom told her that she reminded her of OP's grandmother which OP took as a major compliment. OP is struggling with feelings of hate now towards her dad and sister.
EDIT 9/30/2024: OP actually has two more updates. I will summarize them both here: OP forgot that her Reddit posts were seen by one of her brothers, who found out about their father's infidelity by reading OP's updates. One of the brothers confronted him about it, causing OP's father to call OP's mother and scream at her for it. OP recorded it because of how intense it was and OP's mom let him rant and hung up when he was done. OP's mom messaged the family to apologize for not telling them all sooner about their father cheating on her and she explained everything. OP also sent the recording of their father screaming and calling their mother names. This caused the rest of the siblings, except the sister who already knew, to go NC and be done with him. OP's mother initially cried thinking she broke the family, but then came around after being consoled by OP, declared she is getting a divorce, and they went drinking together for a while, bar hopping. OP's brothers crafted a text to Violet, the sister, and informed her that they are not attending her wedding either and that she can keep their father to herself as she and him "made their choices". This caused OP's sister to have a breakdown and blame OP for breaking her heart and the family and then proceeded to defend their father's affair while blaming and berating their mother. OP's sister also claims to have suffered a miscarriage as a result of the stress, though no one is sure if she was ever actually pregnant. She also threatened to kill herself and so their mother called the non emergency police line to do a wellness check, which got her sent to the psych ward for a psychiatric hold. No one knows where Daniel, OP's sister's fiancé, is during this. The sister is begging for the brothers to come and they all refused. The sister is trying to leave the psych ward but she is not being released and their father came to try and sign stuff to get her released. OP returned to work and said she is an art teacher. She was inundated by hugs and cards from students and co-workers when she returned which made her very happy. She was also sent many nice pictures and drawings made by students to her email. OP's mother is flying home now making OP a little sad but realizes its necessary. OP's new medication is helping now though they cannot having any alcohol which they lament. SECOND UPDATE: OP's father sent an email to her work email, the only place he wasn't blocked. In it, OP's father once again blames her for not being the one to open up to him and claimed to always have been there for her. He also defended his cheating by saying his affair partner was a "wonderful woman" and claiming her mother was not always there to take care of his needs despite taking care of them financially and that OP will learn that a man has needs when she finds one. He also suggested OP take a DNA test, and suggested that their mother cheated as well on her work trips and they may not even be related. He then tries to gaslight her into saying he has always been the good guy and OP has become selfish and manipulative like her mother. He said he expects OP to block him again, the cowards way out. Then said it was just like her "cutting" for the attention she already had.
please get more if u can
@@ManWithTheBones My summaries include the latest updates that OP made. I'll add more if they update again.
Thank you for the update
@@faytquicksilverwaiting for you for the update ❤
@@faytquicksilver thanks for your time!and please keep the thread so we get notified ^^
I’m sorry but every time someone has told me “he’s just picking on you because he likes you” has ended so bad. One of them brought weapons to school…on the same bus I was on…you can’t tell me it’s not bs
Right??? It’s literally NEVER that and whoever thought that for the first time while being bullied is mentally challenged and needs therapy.
I got told that a while mob of bullies has crushes on me and THAT'S why they decided to push me down a flight of stairs and chase me with bats 🙃 all 20 of them now have thriving lives and I now have ptsd 😅
I hate OP's family (well, most of them) for not believing her
As it turns out it is only OP's father and sister who are truly horrible and the rest are just heavily damaged.
For context:
The dad is ab*sive emotionally and only physically with the oldest (who from my understanding was from the mothers previous relationship). He also believes "real men" should have multiple wives and that OP's mother was lucky to have him. Yes he cheated and has 4 other children with a teacher form OP's high school. He also knew the sister and bully were dating even though they "weren't supposed to be because grades should be their focus". He didn't intervene with the bullying because it would have disrupted his "golden daughter"
The sister was actively dating the bully during high school and had him bully her to impress her because he was a love sick puppy dog. She knew about the affair from age 11 and has a relationship with the other woman and her kids. She hates OP because she was the moms "favorite" and that is why she had her puppy dog bully OP.
Ops father is a basket case of disappointment. I have so many words to describe how much of a terrible father he is. If this was a AITA post Daniel, Ops parents would definitely get 5/5, while Ops sister would get 4.5/5. There’s not enough time in the day to describe Ops parents and her sister, but they’re the worst.
The thing is you know that that sort of man will eventually be hurting OP's sister. He has a violent narcissistic streak and when things get tough in his marriage, or the sister puts on weight in pregnancy, all hell will break loose. I know what its like to be the DND/gaming girl in a jock family. It's tough because we are usually much more sensitive than those who got everything handed to them on a platter. They don't understand how hard it is to live our lives, even though you love them so much. I'm now close to my family but it took about 15 years of asserting my personality to them to realise it's not just a phase. Be true to yourself OP and keep close with your brothers that believe you. Also tell them, or your Mum why you acted out as a kid. How you never felt loved or wanted by them. My Mum used to constantly tell me that raising me was exhausting and she shouldn't have had another child. It hurts so much. I know she loved me but when you hear that your whole life as a "cute anecdote" it makes you not wanted. Good luck girl. It's impressive that you are an international DM! Mad respect as that is so hard. ❤❤
The father is a the biggest AH OF A PARENT IVE EVER READ ON REDDIT!!! Really ur gonna believe a dude that is sticking his "worm" into the other twin he could manipulate and now the dude is doing the same thing to the father
💀 father doing the deed with his daughters husband 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 (over use of 💀) lol
if he changed he wouldnt lie about the past lmao
MY EXACT THOUGHTS but as it turns out the sister knew and encouraged the bullying and the bully did it to impress her. The dad also did nothing because it would interfere with his golden child's relationship. The sister hated OP because she was "mom's favorite" which the mother didn't play favorites from my understanding of the reddit posts. Also the dad hates OP because OP would only be calm and not fussy when the mom help her when they were babies.
That dad is a piece of crap he's her biggest bully
I hate parents who do favourite's
this story would be so much easer to follow if there wasn't so many mis pornouncations
I can never find these titles on Reddit itself. Does this go by another name? Or is there a link to the story?
It's on the AITAH subreddit called "I'm not going to be the MOH for my Sister's Wedding because she's marrying my bully"
@@Becca9488 ty
@@Becca9488 Thanks aton.
"My truth" translation; i left out the bits that make me look bad
I need more
Your father is the worst and that liar who who hurt you is the worst a person can act like q victum while he is a beast who hurts hurts and never cares your momis the best what your dad did the worst not beleaving you
I have 5 other sibling and me so we are 6 and I will tell you it pretty messy but it is also fun at sometimes I am the second youngest 😂
I can't listen to this, the way it's worded gives me a headache!🤬 Just tell the damn story without like, 'like jumpin all ova the fsmn place, like ya know?'
Agreed! The wording and language is terrible!
Geez, OP is pathetic.
Try to explain why you came to this conclusion without looking like a massive asshole.
Wtf