Things We’re Too Ashamed To Talk About
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- Опубликовано: 2 окт 2024
- #arttalk #artbookreviews #artcoaching #artproductivity
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I absolutely must sit down for a coffee with you some day.
Say the word, consider it done - I love our conversations:)
@@AdamDuffArt Please! do another podcast together! Thank You Adam, Thanks Ahmed, i really enjoy your videos while i work, maybe is my age (42) but i really identify with your stuff.
:o two awesum doods
@@hyuganokaiten podcasts... what podcasts...
Adam - I want to grow up to be like you.
You are the kind of a teacher who would've drawn out the good in me. You still do, through these videos.
I want to be someone who draws out the good in others.
Thank you.
You just have drawn the good out of me with these words :)
Thank you
@@AdamDuffArt And just like that, the day looks brighter and my heart feels lighter. I love you; happy painting.
@@AdamDuffArt Sick answer, you're really good at this! :D
@@AdamDuffArt thanks for inspiring me and others it's really beautiful of you
Ok raise your hand if you cried a little when Art Daddy Duff cried...
*raise hand*
Last year when sifting through all my bottled-up emotional garbage I found Adam. Started bawling like a child when the emotional purity hit me like a wave. Still does
*raises hand*
again...
Yo, I'm raising my both hands cuz I cried twice
*raises hand*
God damn, yes I did.
Adam Duff video checklist:
Sad orchestral/piano music ✅
Horrifying creatures ✅
Soothing tone of voice ✅
Might make you cry ✅
+ Great dad advises from the heart
this is true hahah especially the crying part
*will make you most likely cry
will make you cry*
Yup
"I am a very disney guy" *makes artworks that are extremely dark*
Duality lol
So?
@@krishansanjula7302 so it looks fucking lit
Sadly, educational system are pretty same everywhere ( i'm from France ).
We dont learn you how to live, how to be a human, how to grow your talents.
We learn you how to be an encyclopedia. That can easily be stored in a shelf, next to thousands of other similar ones
Nobody can teach you how to live or be human. Because it’s just up to the person, what they think is right. If your teacher tried to teach you how to live that would be a problem
@@mysticpyro9181 what adam is doing is teaching us how to live, how to deal with our insecurities and doubts. How to be human means to teach how to relate to others, care, help, collaborate, work, what really means to be in a society. It is a weird concept considering that no school does it, so i think it is hard to many ppl to imagine how a school could really teach what matters, but i dont think it is impossible, i just think it has a lack of interest to make a more caring educational system
On apprend à être de bons citoyens malléables pour les puissants et surtout à être des travailleurs pour le système. Sauf pour ceux qui ont l'argent pour aller au-delà
So one Patrice made such a big impact on adam ( and probably tons of other people) and now adam is making an impact on thousands of people, Jeeez kindness is such a weird thing.
One good deed sparks another
Man, I hated school- nothing takes away your love of reading like being forced to read books you don't wanna read
I completely agree. Even if there were reward programs for reading those books, it just make a pointless chore turn into a paying job, which still isn't what reading ought to be.
I'm only now getting back into reading after making myself read little bits of books I chose for myself every day. I miss some days, even weeks, but I don't scold myself for it, I just remember not to give up entirely and to just read next time I remember to, and those moments I allow myself to sink into a book feels like a bit of that lost passion retrieved.
or reading and learning only for exam.
Absolutely! I loved to read when I was younger, but having to read so many books for classes, exams, etc turned me away from reading for a while. During grad school, I needed a break from animating and wandered into a Barnes & Noble. When I started finding books about art, mythology, etc, the fire was rekindled. To wrap up my ramble - I agree wholeheartedly. If I didn't find books that actually interested me, I'd probably despise reading.
Same here... I read like 30 books when I was in middle school and I enjoyed it so much. Same for comics and manga. But I haven't read a single book or comic book since highschool (it's been like 12 years now)
I can attest to this. If you want to like a subject, perhaps try to do it on your own. The beauty of using your mind to make connections that you can own and maybe even hold dearly is not worth discarding in pursuit of a "concrete system" like schooling.
Not gonna lie, I started to cry while listening this story. The part where you met your teacher again.
Same.
Same T_T
Same Here
I'm 21.
I feel like my mother never believed in the art path that i wanted to take, she is a very conservative thinking woman and only cared for me to not fail school and have enough food to eat. She talks down on me a lot, even now.
At the age of 18 after finishing highschool i spent one year and a half running away from getting a job because i didnt get my graduate diploma because i had to pass 3 subjects: romanian , biology and math. Therefore i couldnt go to college.
I was horrible at math and had no faith that i could learn (i had the hardest type of math to take since i was a math-programming major) but my best friend believed in me. After 1 year and a half at the age of 20 i began studying and asked my mom for money to pay a math tutor.
She constantly asked me if shes wasting money by giving them to me and asked me if i really believe that i can pass math. It was a shitty experience, and on top of that she would rub the fact that i wasted almost two years of my life by not having a job when i was too scared to face the reality in truth back then.
When i had to retake the tests in order to get my diploma i had failed math but i got the diploma last year in the second session , in fall.
Now i'm working for my artschool portfolio, my mother is still unhappy with me but i'm glad i got over that hard step of my life- i'm never going to face math ever again, lol. Thankfully i dont have to!
I know i havent written a lot about my best friend but she was the only one that scolded me and told me that i can and gave me courage to ask for money for a tutor. She was very implicated in this- when i couldnt believe in myself she did and i will never forget that. Sometimes we all need a little push and i believe that it's beautiful that you had a person like that in your life , Adam.
Thank you for sharing!
Good luck on your art school portfolio.
Considera-te norocoasa. Nici macar profesorii de desen nu au crezut in mine. Profesoara din clasele 1-8 s-a ocupat exclusiv de colegul de banca pentru ca era mai talentat. Daca ma sustinea si ma indruma putin, poate faceam macar liceul de arta. Acum e prea tarziu pentru asta. Am 31 de ani, stau cu parintii, nu gasesc nimic de munca si nu gasesc nici un fel de solutie sa ma scolesc in arta. Ah si cel pe care il consideram cel mai bun prieten m-a abandonat cand a aflat de orientarea mea sexuala. Good times.
The more we struggle the better the results we get. Now you only have even bigger reason to become a great artist and blow everyone's mind (;
😓
Wow I believe you it was hard and I know how it feels like to have a parent, that wants the best for you, but dont understand what is best for you. Sometimes we need this kind hand that pushes us the edge. Thx for sharing aswell Sorina
thank you for sharing Adam, im 17( asian) and i hate the school system here so much, i have to hide my true feelings and act nice infront of the teachers because i dont want to be targeted by them so i could just pass highschool bcause my grades were already terrible.From my experience,I think almost everyone forgot the true meaning of education, of schools; all people want now is a god damn diploma, they dont even care about the education, everyone only cared about having high grades and getting a university degree, its like they never even cared about the learning part. when i told my classmates i was gonna be an artist they told me art wasnt a real job and i should just be a normal person to go to university and get a degree to find a job. I think people forgot how vast education is, and not just the subjects in schools, thats why people judge us as a bad , lazy, irresponsible, dumb person for being bad at school, because everyone has their own strengths! :D. The only joy i find in going to school right now is to hangout and talk with my friends, and finding out an amazing and successful artist like you shared your story and said that being judged by your school and by your parents and friends just for my school grades doesnt define yourself really touched me. Love you, man.
Ps you have an amazing mom btw :)
That feeling is entirely mutual
as an Indonesia, people STILL want to get the Diploma because they believe that having those can guarantee you a job without Skill... How can you work without Skill is one thing... You can't do your stuff without any Knowledge whatsoever, you'll be going blind at first and you'll be blinded until you either start growing those skill overtime or you give up
Hey Em Ok, so I ended up writing quite a long comment, I hope it's helpful to you. Take the advice or encouragement you want from it. I'm an artist myself (22) and I sort of understand where you're coming from, even though I'm from a different environement/culture (Northern Europe). My long-term boyfriend is Asian from Hong Kong and he has told me about his experiences being an artist in a (very much) traditional asian family and country. We've had long talks about this, plus I have friends in Japan, China, Indonesia, Australia and India that have opened up about their experiences as well and what has worked for them. So that is what the rest of my comment is coming from (feel free to ask me any questions if there is any or if my writing is unclear):
If art is what you want to do then you'll find a way! A degree (or two hahaa) can be a good idea anyway, but make sure it is something that is beneficial for you.
Going overseas to study can be an awesome experience in itself if you have the opportunity. Furthermore in college/uni, even if parents or someone makes you take a degree that is not the one you want, research and find out if you can take electives that are art-related and stuff. Enjoy the social life and culture exchange and speak to like-minded people! Find ways to connect with art communities like volunteering, galleries, museums, events, even school clubs/societies.
There are lots of ways you can make art on the side of a study or other work too, find the means to make your own success, and take good care of yourself so that you can withstand the opinions of those who think "art ain't a real job". Prove them wrong, you've got this!
And definitely your grades do not define you, as long as you don't need them to get into a specific school then focus on passing and learning life skills and spend time being social and making art (if that is what you want). Even a couple of years later people don't really care about grades, and in an art degree or career the art you make, the passion you have and the emotions you evoke/capture are what counts.
Though remember if you end up doing things you don't want to, that the knowledge and skills you earn from that is not wasted. It can be helpful or give inspiration to what you do want to do. For example I work freelance and there is a business side to it so if I had studied commerce then that part would be easier for me to manage. Another example is learning about nature and science, that can help you understand the structure of the animals and plants you are drawing or how elements are put together if you want to make them in 3D.
Be openminded and determined and it will get you far. Again, take care of yourself too (like exercise, enough fruit, sleep, positive social interactions and so on). If you are in a toxic or unsupportive environment and especially if you have an artistic soul then it can be tough to stay motivated if you're not mindful of it. I really hope my words are encouraging to you, and even if I've never met you I believe in you, you got this. Again let me know if you have any questions or anything is unclear
It's fucking insane how much school influences you as an adult... I had a handful of great teachers that made me survive school.
One day (after finishing uni) I went to a parent's evening with my little brother (in place of my parents, as a guardian) and I saw one of those teachers. I was fucking trembling because I knew what he was gonna ask. I told him the truth, how I finished a degree in a subject I had no interest in, and now I'm unemployed & living with my parents, not knowing what to do. What he said almost brought me to tears. He said "you were always so focused, you'll find something". It made me both sad and angry at myself, because that was no longer me.
I'm 24 today, and have no fucking clue what I want to do. There isn't anything that I truly want (what does that even mean anyway?). It's like I forgot how to enjoy life because of school. It went from taking school too seriously as a kid, to not giving a shit but STILL making the wrong choice to go into higher ed, to waste 3 years of my life.
I haven't even partied/socialised during college/uni and didn't study either, because getting a "pass" mark was easy. Mostly just played video games and basketball. Then art came along, and yes I love doing it, but again I can't tell if I do, because it's not something I want to do as a job.
19 this year, wasting my time in uni, not studying at all but no socializing as well due to covid (and laziness). Always thought I'd love drawing and only had no time to draw when I was in high school. Turns out now that I have quite a lot of time I still can't sit down and draw... Just wasting my time on video games. It sucks when you feel like you'd enjoy something but in reality you don't really, idk what I truly want as well.
I would say keep doing the art mybe eventually you will find other areas in art that you like. I'm 31 and in the same boat wasted uni of 2 years back at age 24 it was terrible. But I've always came back to art it had never left me even tho I'm mediocre at it. I think we all waste time at something inevitable.
@@steve00alt70 Oh yeah I have no intention of stopping, it's just that I enjoy doing it for my own sake and I'm scared that I'll need to drop it one day when I get "a real job"
@@kamingaaa I think the key for us is to be good to ourselves and stop self criticising so much. I used to take everything too seriously so this whole idea was alien to me.
The fact that you find yourself unable to "just draw" with all the spare time probably has nothing to do with your lack of passion/interest, and everything to do with mental health side of things. At least that's how it was always for me. I was expecting it from myself to draw everyday no matter how I felt, and that just isn't healthy.
So please... Take care of yourself man and I wish you the best. I know what it's like being alone and hopeless in a building full of students having the time of their life. I know it's hard af and I'm talking to myself here too, but try and focus on things you genuinely enjoy doing. It's one of the only things that keep me going nowadays, even without friends.
@INCOGNITO, my best advice to give is to draw everyday, maybe for only a minute or for 20, and push through the boredom. Talking from experience, passion is never enough to meet your expectations, especially when starting out. You’ll find it boring and wish you could just stop but it’ll give you a schedule and help build a habit. Passion and habit are nothing without discipline. You’re doing great by trying, just keep going!
This really hits home, I never fitted in school nor did I ever had good grades, the mix of ptsd, anxiety and adhd really didn't help. I had the chance to go to a small private boarding school for girls in Canada, QC and that proably saved my ass. Each year I failed my maths class and had to go to summer school but the teachers at school were angels, they really gave their best and I'll always thank them for that. I never realised how smaller scalled classes gave more opportunities and time for the teachers to help the students. I don't think I would have passed high school if I didn't had good teachers !
It can sometimes take only 1 amazing teacher to transform you forever - I think I should make a video about that very topic :) I think that’s needed after this bit of a rant
Good god I hated school. I was academically lucky and never struggled too hard with studies, but the monotony and pressure of measuring oneself on a scale of how "hireable" and "not hireable" one is, was a genuinely traumatic experience and gave me terrible self worth. I didn't heal from it until years later when I took some drawing classes at my local art gallery, and the teacher who was a professional portrait artist told me I had potential and that I should go for it. I owe that man my whole career 🌷
Love hearing stories like this ♥️
Adam, you made me cry. Because you are being human to us than ever before, that makes me wanna keep going and make more art and stories! Thank you ~
when I got to 18 minutes I was diving into the comments to see if Patrice was here. would be lovely if he did end up ever finding this, I think it would make his day.
🤗😭❤amazing what one incredible person can infuse into us.
Sharing a thought...
I've had to learn to let things percolate. It takes time for our ideas, thoughts, and feelings to steep. A teabag does not immediately create tea when the water is added. It takes time for the truths of the tea to impregnate the water, and to impart the taste of the tea, infusing the water with the truth we intuitively feel.
I’m going to remember what you said Cindy - how beautifully expressed
Having someone believe in you when you yourself can't is so incredible important and uplifting. I have dyscalculia and it made very insecure and anxious. Teachers wouldn't help so I would just sit there not knowing what to do. We tried getting therapy but this didn't really help and I just gave up. When I entered job school (I'm from germany it's called a Berufskolleg, basically high-school that has diffrent apprenticeships. I hope I make sense XD) anyway I joined the course for design. When I started I went to another math tutoring and met the best math teacher. Up until now I hated math and never wanted to try because I wouldn't understand anything anyway. He loved math and he loved teaching it. He would go off and talk how the whole world consists of math and explaining why it's important. Got reminded of him when you talked about Patrice(hope I wrote the name right) Thanks to him I got more comfy with math.
I love great teachers - I’m fact, I’m planning a video on it, they can completely transform your life
It is nice and sad at the same time. Everything bad you experience in life, if you can use it to help at least one other person, it was all worth it
I feel like, if Patrice ever could hear you tell this story, he would absolutely be moved to tears and his year would be made.
Someday in the distant future, a world-renowned artist is gonna cite you, Adam, as one of their inspirations. I do believe that will happen one day.
I love you.
You hit me hard specially on this video, all my life school was a prison, I'm 22, I got free from school only 3 ago, and keep fighting everyday to be productive to make art, to one day get a job I'm happy and proud of, I keep not only drawing and animating, but movie making of comedy, horror, story making etc.
I felt bad and good with this video because you reminded me of what my life has been all these years but also what I keep reminding myself each day, that I'm enough that I'm a work in progress, because I'm an artist, thank you for lending me a hand.
And it hit even harder when you mentioned Portugal, I'm from Portugal and I really think the school system is a joke and as you said, even the teachers know it.
You just gave me a boost of motivation to keep going, you are what the word teacher should be.
I wish you all the best ❤️
We all need to make mistakes which are irreversible to some degree in some moments of our lives to learn and grow wiser from them. The type of feeling you get after you suffered for years since you made some huge mistake and finally can understand the lesson, is irreplaceable. It’s melancholy in it’s purest form which strengthens your sense of your inner self. We should embrace all mistakes we made because they are bringing us closer to the person we really want to be. As far as teaching goes, I feel that once you gather enough of hard lessons in life and you don’t let them knock you down, you are so grateful for this knowledge, you can find deeper sense only in sharing it in some kind of way with others. As one wise man once realized “happiness is only real when shared”. We all want to be happy so…
You know, lately I’ve been thinking what’s the point of being empathetic. Luckily my friends appreciate me for being there for them.... but in common social “competitive” perspective, I feel that I am not even recognized. I even start doubting my friends’ words (and I am sorry for thinking that way). This contradiction hurts.
I don’t know a good way to put in in words, but listening to your story with your teacher has made me want to believe in my friends again. After all, they are beautiful. Thank you again Adam.
I wish someone would've tell me that like 10 years ago.
Me too. God damn sitting here blubbering like a child over being told I'm worthy regardless. I needed to hear that, and I'm 34. Damn.
@@aliz4467 i feel your pain.
I don't know if I am too sensitive or what but i cried again watching this one ^^' Gosh, How I wished I had a teacher who would tell me all this. There are so many mistakes that could have been avoided... I'm in my twenties but I had a verry similar youth, being a gifted child, not matching verry well with what society expected me to be and taking shelter in art. I can rely so much it hurts. I don't know if it's because all artists necessarily go through those hardships but i've never been so much moved by a content creator until now. I'm always putting distance between myself and what I'm watching, but your words man...It's like they were meant for me. Knowing our true value is a daily struggle but watching videos like yours really helps a lot. I mean it. Thank you so much and keep up the great work. You must be such a wondeful teacher, I have no doubt about it. PS: My stepfather is named "Patrice" too ^^
It’s really strange how easy it is that you think about yourself as a failure and isolated ever thought so many people go through the same. Still it’s so much easier to just let your fears run amok and lose sight of yourself. Human psychic is really a tricky thing to deal with.
Thanks for your openness, your willingness to be vulnerable is quite inspiring!
Thank you for sharing this. This kind of information is very useful to many people,. I have constantly been an advocate of sharing these kinds of dark "secrets" as they are necessary for those who have similar secrets to understand they are not alone. It id never too late to figure out who you are and what you want. Things like this, or mental health or anything that holds people back need to be shared so others with it won't feel ashamed, and those who don't will understand it better and not shame those with them.
I had a VERY hard time in school, it was boring, I had medical issues that made it harder, no friends, bullies, etc. I hated it.. I dropped out my senior year and thought I'd never want to go to school again. Now I'm 22, getting my GED, and I want to go to school to be a medical/mental advocate for those in psych hospitals and homes(while still doing art). I'm actually eager now and can't wait to reach my goals.
Adam, you are a wonderful human being. I'm not a very emotional person, in fact im quite the opposite, but you videos nearly bring me to tears. The fact that you are here for the people that need you makes me un imaginably happy. I have a good life and a good family, i dont really have any trouble with education, which makes me feel guilty about having problems. it makes my problems seem incomparable to some of things other people face. Your videos make me feel good, they make me feel amazing in fact. They halp me to deal with my struggles as minor as they may be. And i want to tell you this, i want to share with you a how youve helped me and so many others.
okay wow this made me cry.
i’m disabled and struggling a ton in school and this gave me hope that i won’t be stuck here forever. i’ve basically dropped out twice due to mental illness and i’m finally going back at 18 to get it done and over with so i can go to university and study what i actually want to and work on my art.
i’m gonna try to stop letting my work as a student define how i perceive my worth as a person.
cuz i can do some really awesome stuff when i’m not burdened by all these academic things.
thank you for this video. seriously thank you.
hello art dad
Thank you for this. Being at a very academic school that doesn't really give room for art has been killing my drive to make art. I really needed to hear this.
Thank you. Needed to hear this today. Primary/high-school for me was uneventful but college...I'm at serious risk of getting kicked out due to failing grades. It's hard not to feel like a complete failure, especially since I fought like hell to pass. I don't think my professors meant it, but it definitely felt like in the beginning when i was doing well in my lower division geology classes they supported me and thought I had so much potential....but as soon as I crashed and began to struggle it felt like they just, turned their backs on me. I no longer had potential I was just a screw up who wasn't applying myself. Damn it really hurt. It's still rough but I needed that little bit of hope. :) there might just be hope for me yet...
thank you adam, for being the only person (aside from my sister) who believes I'm not a lost cause. thank you.
I cried a bit this felt like he was talking about me as a kid who went through options in America constantly being told i have potential but with no one to encourage me along the way until i turned 22 and found this channel
I'm turning 17, but while I'm listening to your video, I'm sitting here in an emotional mess. A little bit of tears falling down... I feel the same about school. My school in particular is terrible. There's a handful of students who will go out of their way to insult, harass and bully you, and that type of behavior has contributed to my depression. I've been trying to claw my way out of this depression for months, but your video hit home on the red dot... Thank you Adam. I needed to hear this...
I...I had no idea how much I needed this. I'm an Indian 16 yo teen, and I belong to an emotionally abusive family full of people who're all successful in fields of science whereas I'm the complete opposite. I want to be a writer and artist. I can't tell them because they'll bully me into leaving all of it, and they've already forced me into taking up the science stream in highschool. I struggle with science more than anything and after multiple tries to suppress my artistic desires and do well in academics, I'm finally giving in fully. For me. I _need_ art to live. But my needs don't keep me from feeling worthless and scared because I don't fit into their worldview and .
Hearing you, a professional artist whose HS days were pretty much like mine, gave me so much validity. It's exhausting to be scared all the time, alone with my feelings. Friends say they understand, maybe they do, but I've got no one to guide me.
The assurance that someone made it and I might be okay after all is comforting. Thank you for sharing your experience. I have more than just hope to hold onto now. Lots of love.❤❤❤
... Honestly. That feeling that you invoke whenever I listen to your video is something I cannot describe. I listen to all your videos and this is the 1st I have ever written.
I am 30... my parents were never really supportive of me doing art. I did sciences in both high school and when I went to college. I haven't actually gotten my diploma. I fell into depression in my 1st year and I kind of fell by the way side. My parents actively tried to sabotage me doing art to a degree as in my country there is a saying "if you aren't a doctor, a lawyer or an Indian chief. You are nothing."
I have been struggling to try and get back into art. And looking around i feel so out of place. But it's the mental side that drags me down. I went through therapy again ended in the past week and with it all, I try to use my daughter as a way of motivating myself but it doesn't work all the time. I don't know. I feel as if I am rambling about these things without getting to a point.
I just truly feel as if I am a waste... but I don't want to continue feeling that way. And listening to you open up... I feel the wells of emotion and have cried so much it felt as if a load came off when I did. Thank you so much. Thank you for everything. I have been meaning to say it for some time now. But I just couldn't do it. Thank you. I was in very dark places and you helped.
Just making me sit here and bawl my eyes out while I'm trying to paint dammit! xD
Kept waiting to hear something "shameful", didn't hear anything. :v
But seriously though, Adam, you are such a wonderful person, it's always nice to take a timeout and listen to your soothing voice and words for a while. Today's talk also hit home for me, as i've also had A LOT of problems navigating school, having been an undiagnosed aspie till i was 26, dealing with an anxiety disorder for almost as long and showing a not-insignificant number of ADHD-like symptoms in retrospect. All this is to say that i fit in poorly both socially and institutionally, getting bullied and having extreme difficulty with (and sometimes irrational antipathy to) utterly normal things like homework despite getting the "you have such a good head, please, PLEASE use it!" at the parent-teacher talk almost every year (not to say i'm a genius, many of my peers just compared unfavourably to door hinges). The things we were forced through were just impossibly boring to me, and i literally could not force myself to give a shit about it, so my performance was all over the place.
High school (equivalent for Denmark) at least didn't see me bullied, but curriculum got harder, and this trend continued to university where i've dropped out of two studies and scored some nasty stress-related issues before FINALLY graduating this January and probably never looking back. But here's my point, finally: As much as i've hated school, studying and the outdated rigidity of the educational system, i have nothing but respect for the many teachers who got me through this shit. They taught me, helped me, encouraged me and supported me, and quite frankly i would never have made it through without them being so... Extra. It really is as you say, they're doing their best within the confines that are set for them. It's telling that i remember the passionate teachers as well as i remember the few good friends i've made along the way.
Hell, i also like sharing what knowledge i have, i just don't think i'm a good fit for a teacher position for various reasons. This got more rambly than intended, so imma cut to the chase: Big thanks to all the passionate teachers around the world for their efforts, and additional thanks to you Adam, for the talks, the inspiration and for being so open with us all, i appreciate it a lot. You've probably heard that a thousand times already, but i'm all for making that number bigger. :v
I certainly will save up for a mentorship with you. Hope to see you in a few months, your art talks and philosopht resonates with me and I feel like there are specific art skills you could help me with too.
I wish I had a 'Patrice' in my life :')
Hi Adam, I've just "discover" your videos, and I must say that I loved them, thank you for such great content, I hope you are doing well. Cheers from Mexico
I'm just happy that my parents are just supportive to all of my decisions. I've always been a dyslexic kid when I was young and got homeschooled eversince 2nd grade. thriving in the game art industry was a pay off for them to all the things they've done for me
Thanks Adam, I'm so happy that you feel comfortable enough to share this story and all of its emotion with us. After a hard semester of online college, this message is truly welcomed - my soul feels just a little more complete today.
Adam, this resonated with me on a level I cannot even articulate. My early education was an absolute disaster, too. I attended a horrid public middle school back in the early 1980s where prison rules applied. I was mugged, beat up, pickpocketed, and had guns pulled on me twice. I attended "homeroom" each day to avoid truancy, but I skipped every class except health and art. I found myself in the school's computer lab when I was cutting class. Mind you, this was back when gargantuan, noisy, and hot mainframes had about as much computing power as one of today's typical recharger blocks! No one asked me to leave, even though every adult in the lab knew I was cutting class after class. The computer lab was my safe haven. No one mugged or assaulted me there. This went on for two very long years, and needless to say, I completely flunked middle school. I guess my parents got the memo a bit late, and they decided to take me out of there. I was sent off to a private high school and was wholly unprepared for the academic rigors of a "normal" high school, let alone a private one. I somehow managed to pull a C average, even though I don't recall doing a stitch of homework. Long story short, I was a VERY late bloomer and fell in love with teaching biology after attending community college. Many years later (I am 51), I will defend my dissertation in animal behavior in just a few short months. It's been a long road, but I'm here to say that virtually anything is attainable when you have a true passion for something, whatever it may be. Now I consider myself a lifelong educator, scientist and, now I'm learning how to paint digitally! So I guess you can add "lifelong learner" to that list! Bless you and yours, Adam. You are a gem, brother.
Congrats!
that is really inspiring respect for that thinking ♥️
I apreciate that you take your time to speak with us more often and trust us to tell stories about you, much love
Thank you Adam and Patrice ❤️
This video, among all the other great videos you have made, hits so very close to home. I appreciate your content, more then I can properly express.
Lol, I went through 5 schools too. Now I'm seriously searching info about my own Patrice to thank her
26:15
"...he started to cry, as im starting to cry..."
Me, starting to cry: "God fucking damn it, ADAM!"
i have been struggling with this for the past year and a half, and you just made me cry to the idea that it's ok to mess things up. you sir, just touched my soul and for that, i thank you from the bottom of my heart.
A beautiful story and Patrice sounds like a wonderful human being that about everybody should have in their life!
The best way to find a positive environment is to make one.
Fortunately for me, I never had many negative experiences at school. I pride myself in bringing joy to other peoples lives. Doesn't matter if I had a bad day or not, I just do my best to bring the best out of everyone. What comes around goes around. Something I learned really quickly as a kid.
I was hearing as podcast while drawin hands but FIVE HIGHSCHOOLS WTF? Ok I'm editing this down real quick just to say, because of the pandemic right on my last year at school, I just felt like not doing anything, it doesn't make sense trying to follow an art career but wanting to study on this fucked up condition to get into some random college and study FiNe ArTs (here in Brazil we don't have that much of art subjects at colleges), I don't wanna do that and then finally hearing to this amazing piece of video, these mesmerizing 40 minutes that made me cry twice can only lead me to say thank you, thank you for leting all of us remember that we are not alone, as artists and as human beings.
Acts 2:17-21 New International Version (NIV)
17 “‘In the last days, God says,
I will pour out my Spirit on all people.
Your sons and daughters will prophesy,
your young men will see visions,
your old men will dream dreams.
18 Even on my servants, both men and women,
I will pour out my Spirit in those days,
and they will prophesy.
19 I will show wonders in the heavens above
and signs on the earth below,
blood and fire and billows of smoke.
20 The sun will be turned to darkness
and the moon to blood
before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord.
21 And everyone who calls
on the name of the Lord will be saved. .....
Matthew 25:31-46 New International Version (NIV)
The Sheep and the Goats
31 “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.......
At school I was always told by teatchers that my drawings and scribbles was a waste of time, friends told me the drawings I did was always the same, bland and uninteresting. I got scared of being who I was, I shut myself and my art in, I would still draw and animate, but I did not dare call myself an artist.
It wasn't before finding you Adam, that I was able to see myself as who I actually am, to accept and be happy with that, to wear it with pride. I've had one other teatcher do this to me and I love him with all my heart. He was the first teatcher to truly talk *to* me, not down, not up. But looking me in the eyes and being there as almost a friend. He helped me a lot, adviced me to take a break from school. I honestly think the man might have saved my life in doing so, I was not going down a good path. But It was through him that I was able to more find myself, and through you that I was able to truly accept who I am. I thank you for that, and I really, *really* look forwards to spending time with you and learning from you. It brings me a lot of joy to think about. You're doing a fantastic job Adam, keep it up.
Equally, I love you with all my heart, and happy painting ;}
I wouldn't worry too much about the "bland" part. It's inevitable that your art will develop character and personality over time as long as you continue to have interest in it.
When I dare myself to think back to my early schooling years, I am reminded as to why I don't fear Hell. Oh, I got the certificates and diplomas, but I just don't see myself as a graduate. I'm more like a survivor. I survived primary school, I survived high school. They were Hell because I was constantly shamed for being different from everyone else. I was overweight, left-handed and spoke with a broken accent. I still am all those things.
College was better. Not because of the parties American colleges are famous for. Bermuda's schooling was way more strict than that. What made college better was that society as a whole finally decided to give it a rest. I wasn't made fun of nearly as much, and was actually able to concentrate on my work.
It was not easy finding work, though. I'm not exactly social. I was expected to be an accountant, but my skills are in - you guessed it! - art. After a bit of struggling, I found work with the local newspaper for about two decades, until one day they told me my position was made redundant due to the economy.
Since then, temporary jobs have been few and far between. But to keep myself sane, I remember my true skills in art and literature. My goal, along with finding work, is to remind the world (and myself) that I am an artist and a writer.
Thank you for this moment!
Not certain if I'm listening to a video or lapsed into some kind of life review and I'm dead. Sounds Very familar.....
Hope I'm not dead. LOL
I really relate to the school feeling clinical feeling. Even when I was going to the supposed better school nothing really hooked me.
Every class felt like it was another opportunity to nap or dream about other things. I never really aspired to be anything and because of that my folks never tried to get me to aspire to do something. It wasn't until I started seeing something and feeling something with creating that I started to feel something different. Like something akin to a purpose to keep living?
Teachers, parents, alot of people never understood me cause of how weird people took neurodivergent kids. I had a lot of adhd, depression, anxiety, just a lot I was dealing with that I didn't even realize was pain I was exp riencing on a day to day basis. Thankfully I started the journey to mend and understand my pain and having art as a therapy tool has been life saving.
This sounds like the ADHD-PI anthem. Other than sports, this sounds like my childhood/teen experience. Except I didn't have the emotional investment from alternative teachers, but they did treat me as a human. I still don't understand why all schools are not run 5hat way after all these years. Unfortunately, by the time I hit the workforce, my career art skills were undeveloped and I had no clue how to be a professional artist and was anxiety-ridden. So I stalled out and got nowhere.
Ohhh Adam! Since I am listenibg to your voice, I have been blessed by a person that is kind and knows a lot. Funny that everytime I am in my head thinking too much of my creativity and where I should go in life, you hit my spark over and over again with that beautiful speech of yours. Thank you for sayiny the words I was waiting for somebody to say. Thank you for beeing a teacher. Thank you for beeing the person who you are. Love you with all my spark
Adam - we .... I love you too with all my heart and you are like the best teacher for all of us, or at least for me. you are person that inspire me, keep me moving and feel like belive in me.
Thank you for being there, really thank you - You don't ever know how many times I had willpower to move forward only cuz your video.
All best and happy painting
You shouldent feel that bad about you leaving the school - hack, due deep depresion and seeng no reason to study (becouse i already had practice and real skills in graphic design) i dumped 3 school and never finish one. After third one i just start work as graphic designer. It is 16 years and i never had problem to find job and been never ask "what kind of school do you have". But i dont want to say that shool is not important. You find friends and contact that you wouldent met - this is the most of school i ever had. And you need to have character to learn professional skills by yourself. But just for me, school never was something i needed. (i mean exept the elementary :-))
I absolutely love listening Duff while doing boring (but necessary) art studies.
Damn wish I could keep on reading more comments🖤, love you guys, we don't know each other, but still I believe in you, there's always a silver lining, something to love, appreciate the small things, your path probably will be hard but you can do it, if not you then who, all of the troubles you've been through and hopefully not more to come, would you wish those would have happened to someone else after knowing what it feels like, because I don't and neither should you, plus we can't actually transfer our bad experiences to someone else, now we can only acknowledge them and do our best once again with what we have❤️
Or idk I'm just another human, we all have our troubles, but please don't give up, at least pointlessly because yeah maybe sometimes we also should know when to give up, but so new and better stuff comes out of that experience 🖍️
Oh yes, school, the institution that is more akin to a poultry farm than a place of learning.
I won't share the whole elementary and high school story necessarily, but it echoes with yours, Adam, even if I did not have trouble with passing the grades. In truth, I spent some good third of my highschool years on sick leaves because I simply saw no point to waste my time with the classes if I could just go to the after-hours lessons and do all the tests there with just fine grades. After taking my time to reflect, I've come to realize that for the past ten years, I've been doing nothing but unlearning everything I had been taught in school, and fixing every dent that uniform education put in me.
I say this because it was only in university that I truly learned what actual education was like. It was there that I could choose whom I associated myself with, where I found truly like-minded individuals I could befriend that shared my interests, where I truly learned applicable things that impacted the very way I thought about the world. It was in university that all the philosophy professors treated us as equals in the debates, and corrected our flawed thinking with persuasion, not merely looming over us from a position of authority. It was thanks to discovering the Stoic philosophers that I could still the turmoil in my head and accept the world and myself for what it all is. And it was in this environment that I realized that all great thinkers were still human, still flawed, still could be criticized, and it took a certain amount of pressure off my own shoulders. Everyone gets criticized, both deservedly and especially undeservedly. That's just how the world works, because conveying our thoughts to others is an eternal problem with no solution in sight.
And that is where art comes in. Art is that attempt to bridge those gaps that words cannot, make those connections that logic alone is not sufficient to make. We all carry our scars and bad experiences, but they are also what allow us to see things others might not, understand things without words that for others might require an essay to conceptualize. For all our doubts and fears, they also give us that unique way of expressing ourselves, and if we find the correct outlet for it, the world will appreciate it. Your words resonate with many because there's truth in them. Truth of this world is what truly makes art work, and without it, it's just lines on a canvas.
Patrice sounds like a true Teacher with the capital T, that person that truly makes a difference and offers direction in our lives. Those people are valuable beyond words, and you, Adam, are one of them. Thank you.
Wow, wonderful story and beautifully told! I just discovered your channel this morning :-)
Man, I'm not very emotional but I'm crying right now. You can't just do this to me. I didn't even get a chance to prepare.
Thanks for giving me back some hope. The last two years were really rough for me, since I graduated high school and dropped from the face of the earth, with no real plan on what I can and want to do with my life.
Now I know what I want to do with the rest of it, thanks.
How much love you have for Patrice makes me love him too. I can hear it in your voice and I live to be like Patrice and you. That human connection and love means so much to us as a humans and it’s all I ever crave. Deep human connection and emotion.
Deep, having a mentor like you would be a gift. Thanks for your Insight!
''...is very intelligent if only they applied themselves'' woah did I get that , it wasn't till later I learned I had undiagnosed adhd. This is nearly exactly what I lived , well except the passionate teacher part. I didn't meet that till much much later in life and after much abuse for being different. It is unfortunate I'm afraid that a lot of student that did not fit the mold in Québec education system were subject to abuse and neglect. I must admit the fact that people care now about bullying kinda always surprise me because before you where always the problem if you where bullied , abused and if you say anything the teacher where the actual one bulling and making your life harder. I had gave up art, I had give up do anything other then getting a low level job really and not make any wave to survive. Until I gave up on that too and deceided to just try to do something that look fun and if it didn't work out I just end it cause there was no motivation to continue. Luckily I choose to do violin making , and the teachers there where very passionate. I was devastated when I got my diagnostic of fibromyalgia and could not do that work professionally , but I learned some strenght from going there and it got me to pick up art again. Art motivate me to just keep trying. Thank you for sharing your story today, it is good to see I was not the only one that never fitted in a mold that was offer in this life.
Everytime I happen by one of your videos its like I've found my way back to an area of peace. Such amazing life advice, thank you💙
I deeply, deeply wish I had a teacher like Adam back in school as this reliable anchor of hope... Thank you for every single one of your words said today, yesterday, last week or last year! Thank you!
Constantly making me emotional with new vidoes and new topics and doing it flawlessly
I don't know if i ever will be such a good artist like you, but I hope one day being able to be as much as a genuine, kind spirit as you are now Adam. Thank you so much for this.
I love my teachers but man I am such an awful student... I've been shoving all of my schoolwork to the side to only work on art with the goal that I'll some day be a great artist like you or Proko or Ethan Becker, and what I fear most is that I won't have what it takes because I'm flunking high school but I dunno
Thank you for making this video. My education has always been rocky, I'd been to many high schools as well. I can relate to you on so many levels and I look up to you more than anyone.
Thank you ☺
i always disliked school, for a lot of the similar reasons adam did, it's too sterile and shit like that, also i feel like it could really use some development. Now that i'm focusing mostly on art, i'm realizing i actually really like learning new stuff, it's often fun to learn, it's the way school teaches that i never liked. Also adam, if you're reading this, i don't think there was anything shameful in this whole video, loved it ;) .
Often I listen to your videos while drawing to relax and for inspiration. Today, I needed this. Thank you!
thank you adam, in a world where children are diminished and conditioned to hate the things we love about ourselves, you make the underdogs feel seen AND heard and valued
35:40 hit me hard. I've felt like that for the last 8 years. I just don't know how to get out of this headspace anymore. It's like any and all motivation to do anything at all is just gone. These videos really help me. Honestly they do. I wish I had a teacher like you growing up.
you literally made me cry. thank you, you're a great teacher
Really Really great talk! you are always my background chanel while im drawing, thank you for your sincere and kind words!
In Lithuania we have a saying that the easiest is to get into university and hardest into kindergarden , and i think its our education system in a nutshell, my studies actually felt like a scam , a student is basically a bag of money for university so the more you get the better..... i was always passionate about art and i had no doubts about my career choice, i grew up in a really small town, we did not even have an art school so when i was about to finish high school i started going to capital city for private lessons so i could have a chance to pass entrance exams into academy of arts , i put a lot of effort and time into that and i was successful , my dream came true, until i realised that its actually a nightmare... Teachers were just bad , they would evaluate based on they'r personal preferences, so there would always be a lot of drama, i would not have any solid lectures they would just give tasks but no guidance in later years even the task was your own thing to come up with because you are the artist i was studying printmaking and i can tell that the teachers would not be interested in that subject themselves , every time someone would do anything but printmaking for example installation video art etc they would be praised even though it would be very amateur and for the people who actually study those subjects would look cringy, i just heard a lot of - google this google that, or you should have learned this in art school , so i wasted 4 years on bachelor studies and started to hate what i loved the most.... Then i had to decide what to do, to study more or to get some kind of job , i felt like i got no education and i have no qualifications so i decided to study masters at the same university but different department painting this time and that was another mistake it deepened all the issues i had, i guess many would ask why did you go to the same place for the masters , but the thing is when u finish really shitty studies and get a worthless degree you stop seeing yourself in some better place you think that you are not good enough. So now i have 2 university diplomas i am master of arts with love and hate relationship to it and endless uncertainty about my skills and self esteem. Just wanted to share some of my experience related to art education, sorry for a long messy essay :)
Thanks for sharing this. I think it is beautiful and reminds us how wonderful vocational teachers are.
You never fail to get my spark burning like a wildfire. Every time I start one of your videos and the music starts, I'm unraveled. Your words touch places I didn't know existed and most importantly, you always remind me to be kind, not just to other people, but to myself as well. Thank you, seriously.
omy goodness, now look at you now inspiring beautiful charming talented teacher ever, what a life, hope me find that light at the end of tunnel too. amin
I respect your life it was hard am living it now in Algeria North Africa most of ppl don't care about art , games .. and this my job making games! ....... I hope you good luck
I‘m so thankful for your videos! Thank you very much Adam! ❤️
Man this video broke my heart. This is beautiful et true. Your videos somehow give me hope.
thanks adam , you are really courageous for making video like this maybe with time i will gain the courage thank you .
AND DAMN YOU FOR TURNING THE SPOTLIGHT ONTO ME NOW IM BAWLING MY EYES OUT HAHAHAHA :'(((((
On this channel, after all the advertisements, all the noise and poppy colors you can witness some calm and sincere truth. I'm not an artist, but subscribing to LUCIDPIXUL was one of the best decisions I've made on internet.
Thank you Adam.
Hey, I just wanted to let you know that you've helped me so much recently and I really appreciate your content. I'm a very young artist and was going through a huge change in my school life and listening to you helped me so much. Whenever I'm drawing or doubtful I always come here and listen to one of your videos and it just helps me think that everything is not so big as it seems. You give me courage and hope. I am so thankful to you and I'm sure everyone else here is too. I hope you have a great day and once again thank you.
When I decided to take a chance on myself at 45 yrs old, the planets must have aligned, because there you were Adam to encourage me on. After dropping out of college, losing my position at what i thought was my dream job at a game studio a decade before, and taking a normie 9-5 at a television studio doing shit graphics, late 2019 I decided I had had enough. Its now been just over a year since taking that bet on myself, each week you push me on to keep working harder. Things are now starting to slowly solidify and I am getting recognized by my peers and im producing the best work in my life. I have so much love for you and Trent Kaniuga, I dont have words to express how deeply i truly feel. Bless you, You have made a positive impact on my motivations to believe in myself. My best way I can think of to thank you is to keep pushing myself everyday to follow my passions and become the artist i want to be. I hope one day i have the pleasure of meeting you in person. thank you again Adam from the bottom of my heart.
are you me? I'm 46, I want to quit working my television job and create film and art, but I feel so far behind.
@@ShermanWilliamsVideo be fearless, believe in yourself. it really is never too late, we have a bunch of advantages the youngesters dont!
@@ShermanWilliamsVideo find me on twitter, I would love to follow your journey back into the creative field. 🙏♥️😇
When Art dad Cried, i cried as well ;-;
Thank you for sharing the story...
The purest of All my love to you! This was incredibly touching.