I have a 12 yr old he has seen his dad's narcissist behaviour and is in the grieveing process at the moment, he don't want to see him again but still has to get through the fact that it's his own dad. I constantly have to council him and build his confidence back up.
God bless him. I hope he comes out of it stronger. Im 21 and also grieving my narc father. Constantly need to process that he is my father, but at the same time I never want to see him again.
I’m only 9 days in and my 10 year old feels the same, he is happy and doesn’t want to see his dad but i can tell he is in pain and angry about his dad actions the day I kicked him out. His dad name called him and scared him and he is still trying to grasp it all I hope your son is going strong
Bless you all. I jus got trapped into a relationship with this girl I had just left, she is the most flagrant disrespectful dishonest person/narcissist I have ever met. She's even diagnosed NPD with sociopathic features. And I got trapped by pregnancy which was both of our irresponsiblity but I am such an empath that I am already feeling the pain and confusion that my child, and all your children have to go through with dealing with her. I just hope it works out for the best and really hope I can jus go back to no contact with her so please pray for me that it's not really my kid she got in her, because lord knows I was far from the only man she was sleeping with. Or pray I find strength to have to deal with her for what is seemingly the rest of my life at this point.... Those three months of no contact were so amazing and peaceful, I'm in tears typing this. Neither one of us are even close to ready to be parents, are in no position to financially support a kid. I jus... - this is my worst nightmare come true.. I feel so sad
Experience has taught me that if possible, a trusted third party should be available to talk with your child. This will give them a neutral party to build trust with before it comes down to "he said", "she said". Don't put them in the position to have to choose their loyalty.
There is so much content for adults who experience narcissistic abuse, but nothing really for the children and it's DESPERATELY needed. It'd be amazing if you could make more content on this area. The most frustrating part is that the court system enables these parents. Mental health is considered when it's depression or addiction, but a toxic personality disorder isn't. I've been searching for any material that addresses the impacts that ASPD has on parenting and the way it affects a child and there's nothing!!!
Did you ever find anything useful. My friend is dealing with this now. Her ex has NPD and passive-aggressive personality disorder. CPS didn’t find enough evidence of abuse, despite a mark on his back and the child reporting emotional abuse to his therapist. The therapist got the police and CPS involved. But my friend found out they’re not going to do anything else and that’s the end of it. Her son has to go to the Dad’s every week and doesn’t want to. My friend doesn’t know what else to do. Her son is getting emotionally abused and there doesn’t seem to be anything else she can do.
Totally agree with you, and I’m also desperately looking for ways to support my children and ways to understand and deal with his behavior. My child’s counselors are not up to speed either, trying to keep them going in a positive direction, when they need to be validated in their struggle and pain first. And like you say, courts are not open to have a mental evaluation of another parent, giving them free access to the children.. it’s so sad
I have a 10y old child that needs a lot of help and treatment from a specialist to recover from the narc stepdad and narc biological dad. I've been in therapy for months,my senior care is to heal my child from the abuse. Not only for him to be healthy but also for preventing him to grow to a narc adult. Thank you Ben 🙏
I appreciate you sharing this information…if you are not black and blue no one sees or listens to you. Why do we need to do 3x the work just to have our basic needs met. This makes me cry. It is scary, it can be incestuous, it is not fair. I pray for children to safe, seen, heard, respected. My dream is to help children who have been affected by true narcissistic abuse. No one deserves to fight in this war you didn’t choose, do not want and can never win.
Thank you! I needed this so badly I don’t know how to handle things I’m fine when people hurt me but not when my children get hurt that’s when I get angry and need to find a way to set boundaries and protect them
Mine… I think they still idealize him… pretty sure I’m the main recipient of abuse so far (although we’ve been separated for several years now), but I know it probably won’t stay that way. 😢
Wow, this was very eye opening. My step sons bio mom, is a Narcissist. In the beginning, it used to mentally drain me & I always felt I had to be one step ahead. As I’m healing & growing , I’m realizing i approached stuff wrong. I’m now approaching it from a place of understanding and boundaries . Thank you, for the truth ❤ I will always be my step sons biggest advocate & stand in the gap with truth .
Wow!!! I can't wait for after work today to learn everything I can from you! I have a 10yr old boy and 8 yr old girl that I need to help grow up to be healthy people. They have a horrible dad that we have to deal with this issue on. Thank you so much for helping the kids!
I'm here to support you on your healing journey. If you need assistance, please schedule a one-on-one session with me at rawmotivations.com/one-on-ones.
It's never too late to begin your healing journey! Join our free masterclass and discover how to break free from toxic relationships here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..
Thank you so much for your video. This is so difficult to explain to a person who does not understand narcissism but everything you said happened to my teenage children now and I am forced to watch their pain and neglect.
Thanks. Court is next Thursday. During an interview with the court appointed assessor, I told her How can I show compassion to my son, while trying to answer questions he doesn't know he is asking? His birthday is two days before. Two years this is what she is giving to him, not only for his birthday but for the rest of his life. I hope things change, if not with her then through the court. I feel a lot of shame and guilt, but when we have our time together we make memories My mother used to call me ugly. Instead, I say You are beautiful You're doing a great job. Daddy is very proud of you And I love you very much. Stay warm
We're here to support you on your healing journey. Take the first step by joining our free masterclass, where you'll learn how to break free from toxic relationships and much more. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass
My kids are 12 & 6. The differences btwn them are obvious. My oldest was exposed to all of the chaos, the lies, the hatred, the uncertainty, the substance abuse, the emotional, psychological & at times physical abuse of my ex. My youngest was exposed to those things but only for a short while. CPS kept getting involved & finally required my ex get therapy & take it seriously, learn to stop blaming, stop lying & learn how to be accountable-and they forbade him to be near the kids or me until he did those things. It has never occurred. The devastation he left behind is apparent in my oldest. He has become so defensive, so mistrustful, so depressed & he doesn’t seem able to move forward. My youngest wasn’t exposed to as nearly as much so he’s not having as many issues. Though they’re both heartbroken after being abandoned & also bc they’ve been learning who their father figure truly was/is. My ex scapegoated my oldest (nearly as terribly as he did me) & treated my youngest like the golden child. In any case, I wonder if you can do a video on how to help your children (& adults) work through the narcissistic defenses we unintentionally pick up while being narcissistically abused. I had the kids & i in therapy but can no longer afford…as my ex robbed the kids savings accounts as well. He of course pays no child support nor does he help with medical expenses so we are left uninsured. It’s on me to try to help our kids. Thanks so much for what you’re doing. You help so many of us! ❤
What about men who have a narcissistic ex-wife? I know you stated you help women. Do you have any tips for men who are struggling w/ not seeing their children because of the narcissistic ex-wife?
I am not able to see my grandchildren because their mother threatens all sorts of evil. Whenever my son tries to leave her she goes ballistic. She is dangerous.
When is good age talking kids bout narcissistic if u have certain family member r acting abnormal dont feel safe negative feelings emotional around them people talking badly bout them warning but they r not related to them neighbors these people know something not right bout them u don’t see courption cause depending commuity u live in
But if I’m truthful with my step kids I’d have to explain that their mother’s behavior is not appropriate. She has recently bombarded our teen with texts disparaging their father (my husband). If we explain to them how inappropriate it was, how are we any different than she is when she calls him a narcissist and ‘guides’ them on how to ‘greyrock’ us?
I have a 12 yr old he has seen his dad's narcissist behaviour and is in the grieveing process at the moment, he don't want to see him again but still has to get through the fact that it's his own dad. I constantly have to council him and build his confidence back up.
God bless him. I hope he comes out of it stronger.
Im 21 and also grieving my narc father. Constantly need to process that he is my father, but at the same time I never want to see him again.
I’m only 9 days in and my 10 year old feels the same, he is happy and doesn’t want to see his dad but i can tell he is in pain and angry about his dad actions the day I kicked him out. His dad name called him and scared him and he is still trying to grasp it all I hope your son is going strong
I’m going through the same thing. My kids are 16 and 17 and don’t want anything to do with him.
Bless you all. I jus got trapped into a relationship with this girl I had just left, she is the most flagrant disrespectful dishonest person/narcissist I have ever met. She's even diagnosed NPD with sociopathic features. And I got trapped by pregnancy which was both of our irresponsiblity but I am such an empath that I am already feeling the pain and confusion that my child, and all your children have to go through with dealing with her. I just hope it works out for the best and really hope I can jus go back to no contact with her so please pray for me that it's not really my kid she got in her, because lord knows I was far from the only man she was sleeping with. Or pray I find strength to have to deal with her for what is seemingly the rest of my life at this point....
Those three months of no contact were so amazing and peaceful, I'm in tears typing this. Neither one of us are even close to ready to be parents, are in no position to financially support a kid. I jus... - this is my worst nightmare come true.. I feel so sad
Experience has taught me that if possible, a trusted third party should be available to talk with your child. This will give them a neutral party to build trust with before it comes down to "he said", "she said". Don't put them in the position to have to choose their loyalty.
There is so much content for adults who experience narcissistic abuse, but nothing really for the children and it's DESPERATELY needed. It'd be amazing if you could make more content on this area.
The most frustrating part is that the court system enables these parents. Mental health is considered when it's depression or addiction, but a toxic personality disorder isn't. I've been searching for any material that addresses the impacts that ASPD has on parenting and the way it affects a child and there's nothing!!!
Did you ever find anything useful. My friend is dealing with this now. Her ex has NPD and passive-aggressive personality disorder.
CPS didn’t find enough evidence of abuse, despite a mark on his back and the child reporting emotional abuse to his therapist. The therapist got the police and CPS involved. But my friend found out they’re not going to do anything else and that’s the end of it.
Her son has to go to the Dad’s every week and doesn’t want to.
My friend doesn’t know what else to do. Her son is getting emotionally abused and there doesn’t seem to be anything else she can do.
Totally agree with you, and I’m also desperately looking for ways to support my children and ways to understand and deal with his behavior. My child’s counselors are not up to speed either, trying to keep them going in a positive direction, when they need to be validated in their struggle and pain first. And like you say, courts are not open to have a mental evaluation of another parent, giving them free access to the children.. it’s so sad
I have a 10y old child that needs a lot of help and treatment from a specialist to recover from the narc stepdad and narc biological dad. I've been in therapy for months,my senior care is to heal my child from the abuse. Not only for him to be healthy but also for preventing him to grow to a narc adult. Thank you Ben 🙏
I appreciate you sharing this information…if you are not black and blue no one sees or listens to you.
Why do we need to do 3x the work just to have our basic needs met. This makes me cry.
It is scary, it can be incestuous, it is not fair.
I pray for children to safe, seen, heard, respected.
My dream is to help children who have been affected by true narcissistic abuse.
No one deserves to fight in this war you didn’t choose, do not want and can never win.
Thank you! I needed this so badly I don’t know how to handle things I’m fine when people hurt me but not when my children get hurt that’s when I get angry and need to find a way to set boundaries and protect them
Mine… I think they still idealize him… pretty sure I’m the main recipient of abuse so far (although we’ve been separated for several years now), but I know it probably won’t stay that way. 😢
Wow, this was very eye opening. My step sons bio mom, is a Narcissist. In the beginning, it used to mentally drain me & I always felt I had to be one step ahead. As I’m healing & growing , I’m realizing i approached stuff wrong. I’m now approaching it from a place of understanding and boundaries .
Thank you, for the truth ❤
I will always be my step sons biggest advocate & stand in the gap with truth .
Wow!!! I can't wait for after work today to learn everything I can from you! I have a 10yr old boy and 8 yr old girl that I need to help grow up to be healthy people. They have a horrible dad that we have to deal with this issue on. Thank you so much for helping the kids!
I'm here to support you on your healing journey. If you need assistance, please schedule a one-on-one session with me at rawmotivations.com/one-on-ones.
Yes my 20 1/2 is stuck at the age between 12&15. He's caused SO MUCH DAMAGE I WISHED I know what I know now & NOT be so BLIND
What did he do? My sons are getting destroyed
Very important message to me I have a 12 year old son and 20 year old daughter everything you said was real 🙏😢
It's never too late to begin your healing journey! Join our free masterclass and discover how to break free from toxic relationships here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..
Thank you so much for your video. This is so difficult to explain to a person who does not understand narcissism but everything you said happened to my teenage children now and I am forced to watch their pain and neglect.
Thanks.
Court is next Thursday.
During an interview with the court appointed assessor, I told her
How can I show compassion to my son, while trying to answer questions he doesn't know he is asking?
His birthday is two days before.
Two years this is what she is giving to him, not only for his birthday but for the rest of his life.
I hope things change, if not with her then through the court.
I feel a lot of shame and guilt, but when we have our time together we make memories
My mother used to call me ugly.
Instead, I say
You are beautiful
You're doing a great job.
Daddy is very proud of you
And I love you very much.
Stay warm
We're here to support you on your healing journey. Take the first step by joining our free masterclass, where you'll learn how to break free from toxic relationships and much more. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass
Very important topic, thank you
Thank you for this video‼️
Create awareness among children that some people in family are npd narcsts
My kids are 12 & 6. The differences btwn them are obvious. My oldest was exposed to all of the chaos, the lies, the hatred, the uncertainty, the substance abuse, the emotional, psychological & at times physical abuse of my ex. My youngest was exposed to those things but only for a short while. CPS kept getting involved & finally required my ex get therapy & take it seriously, learn to stop blaming, stop lying & learn how to be accountable-and they forbade him to be near the kids or me until he did those things. It has never occurred. The devastation he left behind is apparent in my oldest. He has become so defensive, so mistrustful, so depressed & he doesn’t seem able to move forward. My youngest wasn’t exposed to as nearly as much so he’s not having as many issues. Though they’re both heartbroken after being abandoned & also bc they’ve been learning who their father figure truly was/is. My ex scapegoated my oldest (nearly as terribly as he did me) & treated my youngest like the golden child. In any case, I wonder if you can do a video on how to help your children (& adults) work through the narcissistic defenses we unintentionally pick up while being narcissistically abused. I had the kids & i in therapy but can no longer afford…as my ex robbed the kids savings accounts as well. He of course pays no child support nor does he help with medical expenses so we are left uninsured. It’s on me to try to help our kids. Thanks so much for what you’re doing. You help so many of us! ❤
I’m in the same exact situation. My boys are 10 and 6. It’s so heartbreaking, I want to help my oldest but can’t. I’m getting him into therapy asap.
6.03 my son popped up and yells that's Dad. The parent that needs feeding..wowsa
Excellent video 🙏
Very helpful. Thank you!
So glad! Would love to help you on your healing journey. If I can be of help feel free to grab a time here at rawmotivations.com/one-on-ones
What about men who have a narcissistic ex-wife? I know you stated you help women. Do you have any tips for men who are struggling w/ not seeing their children because of the narcissistic ex-wife?
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I am not able to see my grandchildren because their mother threatens all sorts of evil. Whenever my son tries to leave her she goes ballistic. She is dangerous.
Going through this Right NOW. My son has left his girlfriend - almost 4 weeks now and it's been quite a "ride"
When is good age talking kids bout narcissistic if u have certain family member r acting abnormal dont feel safe negative feelings emotional around them people talking badly bout them warning but they r not related to them neighbors these people know something not right bout them u don’t see courption cause depending commuity u live in
Age appropriate so when they can understand the concepts and having a safe emotional space for them to ask and answer
But if I’m truthful with my step kids I’d have to explain that their mother’s behavior is not appropriate. She has recently bombarded our teen with texts disparaging their father (my husband). If we explain to them how inappropriate it was, how are we any different than she is when she calls him a narcissist and ‘guides’ them on how to ‘greyrock’ us?
You explain the truth when asked and provide and emotionally safe space. Because if it domes across as attacking then it will never work.
👍💚