The mother who wants to break the silence around youth suicide | Wong Kim Hoh meets
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- Опубликовано: 21 окт 2023
- This video contains references to suicide. Viewer discretion is advised.
Jenny Teo lost her only son to suicide nearly five years ago. To help others, she started Stigma2Strength (Singapore) to provide education and awareness on suicide, and co-founded PleaseStay.Movement, an advocacy movement by mothers who lost children. READ MORE: str.sg/iGoy [For ST subscribers]
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• Institute of Mental Health’s Mental Health Helpline: 6389-2222 (24 hours)
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*"Josh did not want to end his life. He just wanted to end the pain."*
If everyone can understand that powerful insight, then we all can start to help our fellow brothers & sisters cope with the pressures of life.
you are ending your pain, but passing that pain to your love ones. sad part. his mother would never stop grieving and blaming herself for what he did. blame herself for not being there, not understanding him, on why did he have to commit suicide. this is the part where she can not really forget. that is how you pass the pain.
"Death doesn't just end your pain, it passes it on to your loved ones."
So true that a young person commits suicide is to end the pain not their life. At that age you have no sense of what you’re giving up in ending your life. It’s been almost 60 years since I tried but failed to commit suicide. My life has had some ups and downs for sure but I’m so glad I got to live it.
Thank you for sharing your story and I am so sorry for your loss. I can't possibly fathom your experience. It was really sad when your friends stopped the conversation when you mention "Josh also liked durians". Thank you for raising this awareness. I am certain Josh must be so proud of you.
Can't shake the feeling that suicidal feelings are a symptom of a loss of of love & joy for life, it is a spiritual(for want of a better defined term) crisis. I remember as a kid watching a TV show about Shaolin monks it helped so much.
A young student was in tears after having left his family & joining the monastery, the Master upon noticing the students distress inquired about his tearful state, the student replied that he felt alone, lonely.
The Master asked the student to quieten himself & then asked the student, "What do you hear?" After some time the student replied through tears, I hear birds singing, squirrels scampering, crickets chirping, insects flying, dogs barking, water running, wind blowing.
To which the master replied, "How is it possible to feel alone"
It is a reference to a nurturing a sense of connectedness to life(spiritual) I hope young people get to know this feeling as I did when I was young.
Very very sorry to hear the loss of your beloved son. I lost my brother at the age of 21 in a train accident. When you mentioned about carrying your sons clothing reminded me of my mother who did the same which made me teary. Stay strong !
This is so heartbreaking. Moving forward after his death must’ve been so hard. We cannot underestimate mental health or other sufferings of the youth. So, so sad.
Her little boy took a short cut to the end, I wish this woman nothing but peace and wellness 🥹
My sincere and heartfelt thanks to you, Jenny, for sharing this … I couldn’t control my tears after listening to what you have shared. Please look after your good self, people who love you and care for you especially your son wanted you to be well.
Thank you for your bravery. Because we all process grief and loss differently, we are uncertain which is the correct way to communicate with the bereaved. For me, when my parents passed away and my beloved dogs, I asked my family and friends not to bring up the subject until a few months later, when I would be able to talk about them, without breaking down. I am relieved to learn it is OK, even welcome, to talk about the departed suicide to their loved ones. Many of us refrain from doing so, for fear of causing further grief and distress. Best wishes to you. 🌹🌹🌹
Thank you for sharing. My heart aches for the loss but I hope your message will help many parents and children to cope with depressions better
it is so brave of you madam to share and spread this awareness.May God will always bless you and your family.
I hope you turn this unimaginable pain into many lives saved. With much love and a tight hug❤
Thank you Jenny for sharing your story. The wound probably will never fully heal but you will carry it and your son will be so proud of your contribution to the society. To those who say "parents shall...", "oh at least it is better...", we really not in a stance to common on other's life, we really can't and know what did they go through. What we can do is reflecting ourselves and how shall we do instead
Thank you for sharing your story. I lost my younger brother and my mother to suicide. I'm still in pain and heartbroken.
This is so sad.
Thank you so much for sharing. I am so sorry for your loss.
It's hard to understand such pain...its even harder to reconcile such loss...only the intense love we r provided in our very existence..motherly love..may all be blessed within His tender loving care...God blessed..
I am so sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing 🥺🙏🍀
Thank you for bringing awareness and sharing your story.
Thank you Jenny for being brave to tell your story and to let the memory of Josh live on in your efforts to share.. and bring awareness to others..
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing
What a beautiful, loving mother you are, Jenny. Thank you for sharing your story. Many, many blessings to you and your son, Josh, your heart in heaven. ❤
We will have that moment mama, when I close my eyes for the last time one day I know my son will be there, if only for an instant before oblivion, but that will be enough
Thank you for sharing...be strong,God loves you and Josh...
I am so sorry that you lost your one and only son..I pray God to comfort you and may he rest in peace❤
it was tough reading the article and watching this video.
hard to understand how such a cheerful and smiling boy is suicidal but u created the awareness.
glad that you have moved on and living on
you lost him but he lives in you with your purpose
brave on!
"how such a cheerful and smiling boy is suicidal" That's the issue with society. Just 'cause someone is making jokes and smiling doesn't mean deep down they aren't suffering. You gotta ask the right question.
@@thefinestpiecethe right question is...... ..
@@thefinestpiecehe die because of a girl left him. How to help ?
Can't shake the feeling that suicidal is a symptom of a loss of of love & joy for life, it is a spiritual(for want of a better defined term) crisis. I remember as a kid watching a TV show about Shaolin monks it helped so much. A young student was in tears after having left his family & joining the monastery, the Master upon noticing the students distress inquired about his tearful state, the student replied that he felt alone, lonely. The Master asked the student to quieten himself & then asked the student, "What do you hear?" After some time the student replied through tears, I hear birds singing, squirrels scampering, crickets chirping, insects flying, dogs barking, water running, wind blowing.
To which the master replied, "How is it possible to feel alone"
It is a reference to a nurturing a sense of connectedness to life(spiritual).
@@veganathSpiritual can help
It is important to have a spiritual and material balance in life. Spirituality apart from giving inner fulfilment, gives clarity and strength and helps one deal with pressures of life, which can otherwise be very overwhelming!
Praying for both the grieving mother and lost son🙏
In order to help those in pain, we can be there for them by acknowledging what they share with wisdom and patience. Let time heal the pain of the wounded heart.
Thank you for telling your story. ❤
Thank you for sharing so we can learn. I'm so very sad for you❤
Despite the mum provided him more than 100% love, care, needs etc. It’s sad that he couldn’t fight the demon inside him.
I just shed a tear...
My mother could never understand my pain because she discredits me but then, my world does not revolve around her anymore now I'm older and wiser. I make new friends while I'll always be a friend to my daughter.
I'm sorry for your loss.
"Mum, I'm ok, please go to sleep."
That gets me all the time.
May Allah inshchAllah give the youths who committed suicide peace in Heaven.
So very sorry for you , I grieve for you as a mother .I will never know your heartache because my son is still here.I can only imagine ,your stronger than you believe. ❤😢😢😢😢❤ I feel your sorrow ,must feel numb.
Many from top schools from what I heard. 😢 education system here needs to do something to prevent tragedies happening.
I lost my loved ones to sucide too... It hurts alot even though it has been more than 23 years since she has passed on. The living has to carry on with the unbearable pains that continue to haunt....please think twice before you chose this path.. NO PROBLEM IN LIFE THAT CAN'T BE SOLVED. ONLY PROBLEM IS WE HAVEN'T THOUGHT OF.
I am sorry for your loss
Thank you for sharing
condolences for your loss
Thank you Madam for sharing. You are A Strong lady keep moving Madam...don stop❤....but if you need to cry just let it out, ya. You will feel better then. My Doa for you too.🧚♂️
Lost the battle of Stress, worry, fear, and anxiety, depression really need to see doctor and take medicine, it really helps a lot.
God Bless. Stay strong. Amen
I sympathise with mothers pain.
I don’t understand how people who are born into previlage race and family could commit suicide.
Here I am, a man of colour, born to rock bottom, no friends no partner, everyday I only have hope to make my circumstances better.
Suicide comes as an option, but my mind never allows me to dwell on it.
My condolence for the loss
I am so sorry for her and hopefully she can move on.
i am so sorry ❤
Why did he take his life? What was the source of pain that was unbearable?
Hugs hugs you Mdm🥺❤️
The issue is when you sense your child is hitting that directions but your spouse is denying this and refuse that mental illness is exist, you as a mother will be in a dilemma specially when you are divorced and in a location that the mother “female” has not guardian over her kids
To those feeling this way. Wanting a way out. It's ok, you'll be ok. Tomorrow's there, we'll get there. Only love. From one who knows. I made it till tomorrow.❤
I’m so sorry
Stay strong mum...
RIP !!! GOD BLESS. ~~~
Context would be helpful... Not only to understand what happened but how to deal with potential new ones in future...
At least he had a good family who cared for him. There are those who never had any family members by their side throughout their entire lives. Suicide is probably one of the most painful experiences in life.
Early prevention is needed. Never underestimate the power of depression. Our negative emotions are like subtle seeds, when small. But they can grow. The more a person dwells on the depressive thought.. The seed will start to grow into a plant. As the person continues to dwell, it will continue to grow. From a young plant, it will become a tree, then from a tree, it will eventually become a jungle. Once it becomes a jungle. The person will have no control over his thoughts. His darkened mind will take over him and it will suggest all kinds of negative things to him. that;s when the person will have no choice but to want to end the pain.
So, the lesson here is, always deal with the negative thought while it is there. Better than that, always cleanse the mind every single day by meditation. Becos there will be always some dark thoughts dwelling inside a person which he or she may not be aware at all.
I learn meditation 27 years ago. My master once said that a day without meditation is a dark day. I meditate twice every single day. Like taking showers, I need to cleanse not only my body, but my mind in order to remain sober.
Singapore does not have a culture of meditation for children in Singapore. LKY once suggested that students in school could learn meditation if the teachers can teach them. He saw the benefits of meditation from his own experience after having lost his wife to illness. But with our fast pace of life and religious constraints, young people simply do not have the means to practice meditation, only a few have the opportunities because their teachers knew how to meditate.
Mental help group are not enough. Some deeper needs need to be addressed. Most mental help groups often suggest meditation. But to find a good meditation resource is very very difficult.
Meditation is a very important life skill which not many people knew. The ultra modern world has no place for such things. We are simply too caught up material pursues that we have neglected our spiritual needs. And most times, we don't even know what is true spirituality. So we simply just shut it off. To most of us, materialistic aspirations are more important.... until it's too late.
The problem with today’s world is that we value modern logic more than pure wisdom.
Pure wisdom is actually hard to come by. The wisdom poured out from ancient books are sometime quite out dated for the current world situation. While the real pure updated wisdom are mostly ignored.
If only modern dwellers know where to find pure wisdom and value it more in schools of today’s societies, a lot of suicides maybe about to be avoided.
People died not knowing what is wisdom. People chose the wrong way becos no one taught them the right way, the light way.
The most highest truth has to be taught by someone who not only knew the highest truth, but someone who has realised the highest truth. someone who lived the highest truth.
There are only two things that really exist in this world: Light and darkness. Light wants to build the world, while darkness wants to destroy the world.
People who lived in the dark, with the dark, will eventually be consumed by destruction and death.
Wisdom from Heaven is Pure
wisdom from the world is evil
James 3
Two kinds of Wisdom!!
JESUS CHRIST IS WISDOM ✝️❤️
My advice is both parents have to spend more quality time with your kids; quantity and quality matters, there is no “shortcut” or “workaround”.
...end the pain? What kind of pain was he goin thru? Mind to share?
This news 2 years ago. Herself in depression as well. Divorce family.
Oh. Divorce.....
Divorce has an issue ..
be strong..
Hugsss
There must be something she's not saying about why he suicide
人,最大三遗憾:
一儿时失去父母。
二中年失去伴侣。
三年老失去孩子。
希望这位妈妈请珍重,保重。
A temporary separation on earth. I believe you will be reunited with him again in heaven. Pray for God"s wisdom and peace be with you.
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. (Matthew 5:4)
Miracle does not last
So, what can help? Friend and family support, counseling, spiritual support, psychotherapy, psychiatric treatment?
JESUS CHRIST OF NAZARETH
CAN SET YOU FREE ✝️❤️
GOD bless
John 3 v 16-17
John 8 v 32
Life near born either died ..live well here your son will be happy on the another dimension ❤️
Pain is part of life ...
Indeed
Because
All have sinned
And
Fall short of GOD'S GLORY
@@godsamazinggrace5331 Won't be needing God if not for sins
Old people refuse to die, young people refuse to live.
Bloody wrong way to put it. And you have idiots giving you the thumb-ups.
There are those terminally ill who wish to live
And
there are those who are given a life but wants to end it!!
I think a complete video will be more helpful
To forget the pain you need to be happy like what your son last told you. Try to dress differently or read book that you usually would not pick up or change to a vegan or detox diet to for a few weeks or try learn a new sport or dance. Very sorry for your lost lady.
Not a good question by interviewer at the end..
To a teenager / young adult, what can cause so much pain? Ok, academic stress can be one big cause, or family problems, but if no academic stress or family problems, then what else can cause pain? To address the issue of youth suicide, we need to understand the causes first?
He got Girlfriend problem. Family divorce. Mother also depression.
You don't need an external reason to be experiencing depression. Our emotions are controlled by chemicals in our brain and imbalance in those chemicals can cause us to feel or not feel certain ways. It's something that is very mortal and out of our control. I think the important thing would be to educate people to be more aware of this, and to help those who need help to seek out for potential solutions.
Mother is depress + fierce ,+ no father love. + No girlfriend love
The mother looks very fierce. To be honest. You can sense the vibes. No offense though. Just few can take this stress of daily fierce
Teenagers often cannot handle broken romantic relationships. Thats why its best they only start at around 21. Not in secondary school etc. I have seen many young people turning their own lives upside down after their relationships breakdown.
🙏
People dont want to end their lives
Its something troubling them
Sooo if that thiing is not resolved ,there is no human alive that can endure that intense pain or suffering
If u can endure its not that intense ,u overcome it or live with it
Its personal
Pain may never go away BECAUSE life is full of challenges.
But pain can be managed.
Schools, colleges, universities should teach the necessary life skills that deal with emotional + psychological pain management.
❤
rip
What pain? What was his pain?
I may seem a bit hard wanting to know his reason for his suicide. Everyone has their reason and every reason could be different. To know so that when we do meet and search the library of reason, We may be more aware the better approach to that person. I have lost a best friend many years ago, I think he feel personal inferiority. Committed suicide on the day I was supposed to bring him out upon his sister's request to cheer him up. It took me six years to accept the loss. I was then not even 18 years old, not a Christian. Little I know how serious his problem and how the correct way to help him. Now I am 68 years and recently converted, I often wish if I could wind back the time. Many of us have little knowledge to understand and provide the necessary help but so long our heart is willing, we will find a way to help them. I am a Christian and I fully trust the ability of my Lord Jesus Christ to help this people in his full capacity. I hope you will go along this path and find the acceptance of your loss of him and yourself to avoid the path he had chosen. I can be sure because of his Love for you, he wants you to live in good spirit and not feel anyway he is bringing you down in your life. If you are OK, he is OK ❤.
Oh my goodness. Your answer is that you think to use Lord jesus Christ to help him. Indirectly you are saying without Jesus, you have no idea on how to help at all. Cmon, you can do better that this uncle.
What kind of pain was he suffering from??
Because everyone goes through pain in varying degrees and frequency
Too much money. Open mouth get liao. Too painful
@@oceanblvd8what happen to your Thai PM ?
@@oceanblvd8you paws still keying. Why too painful to key ?
@@tankman20064comment here comment there. too boliao
@@ssunfloweringchange account reply also boliao 😂
❤✝️🙏
22nd November 2022
You will see him at restriction time bliven God ,heavenly God known more than every body what Josh fill
Where is the father?
Is he close to his father?
So sorry for your loss…
But it may also a problem of a missing father ….
Society nowadays degrade the role of the father .. taking away the strongman to destroy the family…
Many Singaporeans youths are depressed,after spending a lot of money & goes to debt,they have to compete with FT from 3rd world countries for a job
You sound like a professional psychologist giving such views but your sucky english really say otheriwse
Those foreign talents from the third world were raised by loving mothers who knew how to nurture their children like human mothers, not hyena mothers, tiger mothers and jackal mothers who drain their children's life energies, crush their souls and make them want to kill themselves.
Life is full of hard knocks
Ups and downs
Stand up again and again
you will realize that you can be resilient!!
Life's lessons grow an individual
sorry for your loss. Ask St Michael the Archangel for help and Archangel Raphael for healing
Child growin in tix stress small city?
Where the father ?
한국에서 벌어지고 있는 이 모든 괴롭힘은 잘못된 것이며, 중요한 것은 당신이고, 당신의 삶은 소중하다고 믿게 만드는 것입니다. ❤
🙏🙏🙏
RIP 🪦 anyway
Too much pressure to living in Lion 🦁
Sorry 😢 in terms of education level achievements ? Or salary level
Too complicated, anyway better than Hongkei ? We are living in a tiny coffin ⚰️ room 😅£600 a month not including E bill 💸 & water 💧 etc 😅
When he found he is already rich. He live his life without a purpose. That the problem. Human need a purpose.
if you have nothing better to say, just shut up.
@@ClaraFlater_than_surface_board go hug your cat
@@ClaraFlater_than_surface_boardyou got purpose. 😂😂😂😂😂. You everyday complain PAP lor😂
Have to follow Buddha teaching...life is precious than any others...so the desire of sucide will not comes up.
What pain...?
I wish this young man had accepted Islam. 'Self-Deletion' is Forbidden in Islam, as your Life is a 'Test' an Examination and is not meant to be an 'Easy Journey.' Youngsters today, think they'll 'Magically' Cruise through Life like a Celebrity or Popstar ... but it isn't designed (intelligent-design) that way.
Your sin is forgiven for Jesus’s sake!
Dear mum, you should have said to Josh at that very moment, "son, remember in life, no difficulty is worth ending. There are solutions to every problem, if u still can't figure out, let me join in the brainstorming together with you, we are a family forever."
No head no tail. Maybe too rich.
Indeed , there must be something she's not saying about why he suicide