One Couple’s Surrogate Nightmare
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- Опубликовано: 11 июн 2024
- What are your rights when the surrogate you’ve hired decides to keep the baby? Family law litigator Fred Silberberg joins the Doctors to discuss the legalities of one couple’s nightmare scenario.
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I just find it super weird that they used the surrogate's egg and not the want-to-be mother.
Chicarabiosa The biological father’s wife might have had her ovaries removed because of something like ovarian cancer.
If the want to be mother couldn’t use her own egg then they should have gotten a donor egg . They should have gone through a surrogacy agency so that this wouldn’t have happened
Pretty sure they did this completely illegally and irresponsibly and David just had sex with Jamie. For all we know this was all done as a pinky promise
It was the surrogate's egg, meaning it's her biological child, what's the debate? Doctor's what are you trying to say? Do you know the adoptive want to be parent? Why are you shaming her for wanting to keep her child? They should have used their own egg?
Monae Jones I agree with you there...if the woman doesn't have any viable eggs they usually use a donor egg and a different surrogate. Using the surogate's own egg was bound to lead to some kind of problem.
Edit: it's pretty easy to grow attached to a child you grew in your body even easier when it's your own flesh and blood....they should have used a donor egg
Thing is she’s not just “the surrogate mother “
She’s the real biological mother.
She is much more of a parent than the people who commissioned this child’s conception, gestation, and birth. She did the gestation and birth. Even if the egg wasn’t hers, surrogate mothers are biological mothers. Gestation is a 40 week biological process. All kinds of messages, nutrients, everything goes in between the mother and the fetus during gestation. The idea that surrogate mothers aren’t biological mothers is absolutely appalling. The idea that a “traditional surrogate” aka a woman who has plans to sell her biological child which she has also gestated and birthed, is most certainly a mother. Not a great one in my opinion but the baby traffickers are much more ethically corrupt than the surrogate mothers, who are being used for their bodies
she is the surrogate lol bio or not she was a surrogate she stole their vavy and tricked them into it so now she gets their kid and child support what trash
@@NStreit04 would if it’s your egg and your husband sperm. The child is not genetically the surrogates child. She Is just a gestational mother. Not everyone can carry there child so that mean they shouldn’t have kids or someone who is not even related to the child can keep them because They birthed them. How are they being used for their bodies they are the ones who have to sighn up through a agency and under go extensive exultations and they get compensated.
That baby has more of a connection to the surrogate mother than the couple who exploited her.
7 years? The child is 7 years old now, they can't just take her away from her mother despite the events. She's formed a bond with her mom, wtf
It would also be kinda weird to take a child from a mom with no other children when they already have 3...
lollsazz not weird because it's not her child, it's the child of the parents with 3 kids as it's their egg and sperm therefore their child
They can as it's their egg and sperm
No, you're wrong. Only the father donated the sperm. The surrogate used her own egg. That's why there's such a debate around b/c the law considers the surrogate to be the actual mother since she's the biological mother.
Chicarabiosa my opinion is she is the mother. I feel sorry for the father and his wife but that is her child. No way they could take it from her with no contract.
Was there no contract?
Phobepotatoegirl Pretty no
This is really weird! I can't believe they had to go through that. This is why it's important to go through with a proper clinic. A background check is also very important on a surrogate. I'm still shocked. This is the dark side of surrogacy! I really hope no one has to go through with it.
surrogacy should be illegal the only dark side is the damage done to the real mother, the one that gets pregnant
Legally the baby is Jamie's and David's.
crystal sparks there wasn't a contract
That is explained in the clip. No, legally the mother is the mother. She is the genetic parent, the gestational parent, the birth parent. There would either have to be a surrogacy contract or an adoption in order for the baby trafficker’s wife to be the legal parent. David is legally the father of the child. Not his wife.
@@NStreit04 agreed
The parents are David and the “surrogate” David’s wife is not the mother.
Wow. Thanks for addressing this. It is, without a doubt, the biggest nightmare of the IPs. They struggle so much in their lives to reach this point where they apply for surrogacy. The application and the other relevant formalities of the program take up enough time and energy. Imagine doing so much, and then ending up with no baby. This would be so disappointing.
Child support 😳WTF!!!!
Get Off Your Bass And Lets Fish I would just terminate my rights let her keep the baby not pay child support. When the child gets older she will want to know her father.
I said sign over the rights too. I wouldn't play that shit.
If God forbid I can’t have a child, I’m doing closed adoption. I’m not putting my body through that or use a surrogate. Personally, I’m not attached to the idea that the baby has to be related to me for me to love them.
Obviously everyone is different but that’s just me. There are sooo many kids in this world who need a loving home.
Wait just realized they already had 3... why were they soooo desperate for a 4th?
if you ever get a surrogate DO IT ALL BY THE BOOK!!!! legal contracts reputable places do not do this!! never trust anyone to have your child this is nuts
This was quite interesting to watch. This is definitely something that IPs are most terrified about. It's what makes the decision of going for surrogacy so difficult. Thanks for this upload!
Sound good. How beautifully you explained the things. People who are going through this situation should watch this video. In this way, they would get some awareness of it. Keep making such kind of videos and make us aware of such techniques.
This is pretty messy, it's her egg and her baby so what can you do. Of course she has the rights to the baby its her own child.
you are doing a great job , I highly appreciate your efforts . Being a young girl, this information is really important . Thank you so much for making us aware. I really adore you .
Many people going for surrogacy face terrible times after the procedure. This is because they have not completed the legal documentation. The video tells the legal processes in detail. It tells why it is important to complete the legal essentials. It also elaborates what kind of documents are needed. It will save the parents to be from a difficult post procedure thing. It would be great watching this for all the IPs.
Personally I would never allow another woman to get pregnant with my husbands baby. I’d rather adopt. Win win.
This actually becomes the nightmare for the people who got such things. And that's the reason you have to look for the contract based surrogacy procedure.
that lawyer Fred is damn fine
Okay, in the beginning, this was unfair and I understand the pain. However, 7 years old, 7 years she has grown up with the mother. So long as this child is being cared for, at this stage, the best interest of the child is to stay where they are, how traumatic to uproot the child now.
Hi, How are you? This is a really informative video. Be careful while taking a decision. You have to consider all the issues. You have to prepare for all. Good luck all.
Well it's your fault now. It's been 7 years. The kid grew up with the mother. You can't just take her away. Maybe at 1-3 years at most but 7 years? You've already lost..
Jami Christine my understanding is that they have been fighting for 7 years to get that child
Carole Couture Yeah. But they need to think of that kid now. That kid is now with it's biological mother
Jami Christine Yeah, I get what you mean...You've got a point. I didn't see it that way but you might be right.
Jami Christine it's not their fault if they've been fighting since she was a baby it's their egg and sperm therefore their child
Ro x no it's her egg and the other lady's husbands sperm so I think that's where it all went downhill...
Thanks a lot. Your posts really make me realize the issue You may be required to prove that you have permission from the mother for you to have left her country, effectively taking her baby away from her. In some cases you may be asked to prove that that you have permission from the Children's Protection authority of the country of the child's birth. If the mother has a different citizenship from the country in which she gives birth, then that doubles the paperwork.
Surrogate mothers are indeed amazing mothers ever. They sacrifice their everything for other's feelings of happiness. but sometimes surrogate mother did refuse to hand over the baby to the intended parents. if they had to refuse then why the give hopes to the infertile. it is really a heartbreaking situation.
They shouldn't have to pay child support 😤
Why?
It's the father's sperm???
That's why legals are 100% important. And look into who's carrying your child. A lady I know just gave birth to a preemie baby, didn't take care of her self and was constantly in and hout of the hospital for pain meds. That baby is going to have issues. Don't be so desperate to have a child you skip steps. Get to know your surrogate and don't trust agencies to do background checks, do them yourself. It will save you in the long run. I am a surrogate and hide nothing from my guys from medical to personal.
Such an unfortunate story. This is the first time I got to know about such a surrogate incident. But I think the surrogate has the right. She is the biological mother. She gave birth by herself. Her eggs were used. She must have the child.
Adoption can cost $29,000.00 and up per baby. surrogate mother cost $120,000.00. fertility treatments can cost $50,000.00.
Viktoria Van Eycke keyword "can." surrogacy usually in most cases costs around $10,000-$45,000 TOTAL idk where you got 120 grand from
Sophie Harris doesn't guarantee a baby on the first round. plus u need a loan that can cost you monthly payments. you have to be rich to do it
Sophie Harris one to get a loan must have a high paying job with very excellent credit
you do know adoption isnt that simple right?...
Viktoria Van Eycke I think it's despicable to put a price tag on the gift of life. Money does not make a person a good parent.
The child needs to be taken away from that woman. She stole a couple's baby, betrayed their trust AND forced them to pay for it. She is extremely selfish and disgusting. She shouldnt be trusted with children, let alone raise one.
hello friends! I am very thankful to you guys for such an informative video. it really proved helpful for me. I am so much devastated about my infertility. Then some of my friends suggest me to subscribe to your channel. Then I see your video. I am very happy now to hear your success story. also, pray for me guys. Stay blessed.
Surrogates should not do this. They should sign a contract befor doing anything. Issues like these should be taken into account. It is not is that someone else is taking your child. Laws and regulations should be strictly followed.
This is so terrible. I can't believe it. How can the surrogate keep the baby? She cannot claim the baby. I wonder what's wrong. The baby is supposed to be handed over to the intended parents. I hope everything gets fine soon.
hi everyone. Your video is very informative. I am not aware from surrogacy process before watching this video. but I think that after watching this video I am totally aware of its whole process now. and the charges that are paid to the surrogate is highly reasonable. Although the couple can’t pay the charges for her pain some ethical values are held between these to characters. Nice to meet you guys. stay blessed dear.
Shouldnt have used her egg
Hello everyone. How are you all doing? I become a parent through surrogacy! This happened a few years ago. I really feel bad for the couple here... 7 years of lawsuits is terrifying alone... Then you remember what they are fighting for... It's just super scary. When I started surrogacy I was very afraid of this. I was shocked to find out that this very rare... Especially if you take measures to prevent it. For example going on to a clinic that provides security. In my case it was Biotexcom! So nothing bad happened on my journey. Hope things are fine for you all too... God bless you all!
Security in some cases means they lock the woman into a facility and force them to give up the child. The hormones women get during the pregnancy bind them to the child, so even if they agreed to it, they still want to keep the child later and feel a great sadness when they have to give it up. I think surrogacy should be illegal because of the pain it causes the surrogate. I think if a woman gives birth to a child it is hers, even when it does not have her DNA.
Hey. I have been through this phase in my life. I know how hard this is. I am glad I came across the right people. The right professionals. Or else i would never be able to cope up with my situation. Thanks to good clincs.
Lydia Martin
Hi Lydia
What clinic are you referring to?
I am sorry you had to deal with that. truly a strange cruel world we live in. I hope things are looking up for you. The mutual bond between the parent and the surrogate mother is everything. I don't think things can move on without deeper understanding. This is why I'd always opt for an agency. Currently in contact with biotexcom. Will soon attend the London event on18 August. Pray for me guys.
The surrogacy agreement is a huge deal, plus never use the surrogate's eggs.
Always sign a contract have it notarized talk to a lawyer
This is so horrible. It is really the biggest nightmare of the IPs. They struggle so much with the entire procedure. They don't deserve this. This is why going to a proper clinic or agency is important. They take care of these matters.
After 7 years it should just stay how it is if the child is healthy and happy.
But any woman who would steal a couple's baby, betray their trust and on top of that force them to pay child support would make an awful mother, I definitely wouldn't trust her with a child if that is the kind of attitude she has towards other human beings. Disgusting woman.
I’m hoping she grew attached especially after her husband left her and views child as someone that will love her unconditionally and she can love unconditionally that won’t leave you.
Instead of just a money maker
Jennifer I get what you are saying, but she hasn’t had any problems proving she’s a good mother in court. At least the kid has a relationship with her father. If they do eventually win it would be cruel not to let the kid see her biological mother. But that bitch would be paying child support. Lol
They shouldn’t have to pay child support.
Hi there! Thank you for making this video. If surrogate mothers have her own eggs then the baby will be her. She has the right to keep it. If you want surrogate mother then she must have her own babies first. Very first child of the surrogate mother is not good. People should be aware of all legalities.
I can't believe this. What's going on in this world? This way, no one would be able to trust each other. I feel poor for the parents. They must have felt so bad. How can the surrogate do this to them? I wish there was a solution to this.
This is incredible. It seems illegal to me. Did they not make any contract? I have heard, that according to the contract, the baby must be handed over to the intended parents. How can she be a surrogate without having her own children? Quite confusing. Now the child is already bonded to her mom. Seems difficult to take him away.
In this case she used her own egg so essentially the “surrogate” mother is the biological mother and would need to give the baby up for adoption.
That's the reason that you should always look for the contracts first. If there is no contract you should stop. I had an interaction with the IP who went for surrogacy with BIOTEX.com. They said that there was an open agreement. And that's what the initial steps they took. This actually makes me feel better.
does anyone here know where i can watch full 'the doctors' episodes from the uk ?
That’s her egg,so it’s her kid
It was the surrogate's egg, meaning it's her biological child, what's the debate? Doctor's what are you trying to say? Do you know this woman? Why are you shaming her for wanting to keep her child? They should have used their own egg?
The child is NOT hers. There was a legal agreement and she broke it.
I think they’re more just letting public know that if your going through with finding a surrogate do so in a smart matter not rushed. Aka lots of contracts and don’t use surrogates egg unless you went full depth in contract
Emogirl Did you not watch the video? It wasn’t a legal agreement. It was a verbal one but not in writing. She wanted to keep a child that is legally and biologically hers. People think when they have money they can get away with cheating the system but this time they played themselves.
no contract, nothing illegal
Alex Berry She knew this before she was impregnated and agreed to it! I’m wondering if it was a scam from the beginning?! Like she knew she was headed for divorce wanted another baby but needed financial support to do it!! Now child support from both men and a free babysitter every other weekend from someone who would be unlikely risky of ill treatment, aka a father who wanted a child to begin with! That woman is no different that any other scam artist and thief not to mention selfish to the point of putting herself ahead of her child!!!
Try not to stress. I truly trust you don't get any terrible news. Simply continue attempting. What's more, regardless of whether you do simply recollect it isn't the apocalypse. Stay strong
HI, I hope you are fine. I hope all your problems fade away and your life a successful life.
This is really sad and upsetting. It is wrong and illegal. The child should be allowed to live with her mom. Legally the child is of James but there was no contract. It is not right after 7 years to take the child away from mother now.
This is why I wouldn't be emotionally strong to carry a baby for nine months and give it away. if you want to be a surrogate mother you have to be sure you're STRONG ENOUGH. Don't mess with a couple who are giving you all the hope for a baby.
You want to have one, child with a man you love, then he goes off with the, surrogate and she raises your, child and t gfve anything to see her, worst, event ever!!!
I'm a surrogate and the intended parents stopped all payments and communication once they were born at 30 weeks and 4 days.
Wait so your saying they just dumped their baby on you!?! That’s messed up especially if you aren’t making enough for an unexpected baby.
Uh oh. Its horrible. when people do scams like these and steal the very soul and joy of someone else its heartbreaking. Surrogacy should be promoted positively. These kind of incidences are what makes it illegal in many states.
Having children is really a blessing. Surrogacy is very convenient for infertile people. I had blessed with a child through surrogacy. Surrogacy is really a great blessing for people like us. Surrogacy is a highly successful procedure. Everyone good luck. Take care and lots of love.
I'm really happy for you. wishes you good luck with your trying. The thing really appeals me is your husband is cooperative with you.I am pregnant through IVF . I went to Biotexcom for this. I am glad they were very cooperative.
This is extremely strange! I can't trust they needed to experience that. This is the reason it's imperative to proceed with an appropriate facility. An individual verification is additionally critical on a surrogate. Regardless i'm stunned. This is the dull side of surrogacy! I truly trust nobody needs to proceed with it.
Why do people say couple's are desperate?
Hi, This was informative video of the week. 'Family law litigator Fred Silberberg joins the Doctors to discuss the legalities of one couple’s nightmare scenario' you people discussed a lot of the information. This is what that makes people to have a good decision on the basis of such information that you told us. Thank you for you all and your love :)
Obviously they didn't do ivf they tried saving money and it wasn't contracted up properly. It was irresponsible and it was a risk that could have worked out but sadly it backfired.
Never heard of such an incident before. Although it was the parent's child, if he is happy and healthy with the mom, she should be allowed to stay there. Seven years is a big time. He must have developed his bonding now. Anyways, did she not sign the contract first? Looks very illegal.
Jamie, MY SUPPORT TO YOU!! It’s your baby!!!
That's why you have legal contracts
She's not the mother she's a surrogate
Okay in the beginning this was unfair and I understand the pain.
However, 7 years old, 7 years she has grown up with the mother. So long as this child is being cared for, at this stage the best interest for the child is to stay where they are, how traumatic to uproot the child now
Zay Say But the child is growing up with an evil woman who stole a baby, betrayed a couple's trust AND forced them to pay for it. she's definitely not a fit mother if that's the kind of behaviour she thinks is acceptable.
What I’m not ok with is she stole time from biological father he missed important milestones in the child’s life because she decided to run and hide child
@@Jenniferhehshebw she didn’t steal a baby! THE BABY IS HERS BITCH,IT WAS HER EGG
Really....Nine years she had no missed appointments or missed medication. You feel she is unfit. That is a sad...sad...sad shame. They should be liable to reimburse all expenses associated with this.
Sounds like The Handsmaid's Tale on Hulu.
Damn that lawyer is fine
everyone saying its her kid, ITS NOT sure it may be dna wise but she agreed to be the surrogate! just because her husband left her doesnt mean she can rob them of their money and also THEIR BABY!
Mc Nugget too right.
She did agree, but again this is a human who has feelings and I bet she bonded with the baby in her belly. From what I understand they didn't do this correctly from the start, both parties are wrong. Taking the money, I agree is morally wrong.
Mc Nugget there money ok 😁but their baby 🤔
I think $459 is not that much and this is why adoption is important. Why did they want another one when they were blessed with some already? If the wife could have loved a baby that wasnt her egg....they could have loved a child that wasn't biologically theirs...
Way too many BioTexCom comments like wtf
They did no research
There's nothing that they can do about it
Hello, I hope you are living happy and doing awesome. Surrogates some time do for humanity and some of them do for the money. But in both cases its hell hard to handover that happiness you carried in yourself. So due to some state or the legal issues, the parents have to face the circumstances. When surrogacy is legal you are free to go but when you are under restriction then you can't do anything then you have to move to some other places where you easily have the baby. The best choice for the women if she is infertile then shes must choose the option of surrogacy or the IVF.
It is horrible for a woman to bring a child into the world and then have to give it away, even if she agrees to it. The hormones tell her it is hers and that she has to keep it. Also the baby gets used to the mother in the womb, it hears her voice and heartbeat, it should be with his real mother, which is the woman that gave birth to it, whether it has her DNA or not.
then she should have had a child with her husband
Humans are not robots, who knows if she planed it or if she thought she could give up the child but then realized she had feelings for it. Either way, I think surrogates should not be allowed.
For me, that's a three parents babies. Surrogate is a birth and legal mom to many countries. To be fair, women has a relationship with baby 's dad. . She is the only women wants the baby. She is a legal mom because she paid a lot of money . Surrogate mom is a birth mom., But she never in love with baby 's dad. Why does she want that baby. , Even thought she wants sperm donation to have baby. She needs to see the man ' s picture. Not all the man she wants. She has no right to keep the baby. She must return the baby for the women have the problem infertility. If she can't help infertility couples. Don't do it, let another women do it. I believed there are a lot of women with big heart. Nice can help women infertility to have kids.
This is very wrong. Proper contracts are made. No one has the right to deny this. The baby is of intended parents always. Not the surrogate. They should do something about it. Otherwise, there is a chance many would start doing the same thing.
It’s so weird to me people take these things too lightly it’s a person it’s a baby you’re creating a soul
Their biggest mistake was using her egg.?....
A mom decides to raise her baby. It’s sad for the intended mother who is now the step mom. But I have such joy for the mother who followed her heart and decided to raise her child.
Her child?? That’s not biological hers it’s like kidnapping.
@@idontcaretbh22 they called her “traditional surrogate” which means it was her biological child. Her mama bear senses turned on and thank God she had the power to raise her own child under the law.
I would be the perfect surrogate.... didn't want to bring my own home.... 😂
sad
Can I digress ? Mr. Dr. Why not have the couples on to fight it out?
I feel bad for the couples. How can a surrogate do this? They already knew that the baby didn't belong to her. I can understand her feelings. It is not easy to give your child to someone else. But commitment is a commitment. Couple should solve this matter according to law. keep updating me about this matter. I hope the issue will be solved soon. Good luck
WHAT THE HELL?
This is a terrible outcome for the child. All the so called adults involved should be ashamed of themselves for creating this lifestyle for the child. The child is now picking up the emotional tab of the selfish needs of the parents.
It's her baby. Her egg her baby.
The biological mother is the surrogate in this case. Why didn't they use their own egg?
And after 7 years just let it because at this point the best for the daughter will not be to rip her out of her mothers arms. Plus they have 3 kids already
The man doesn’t have to pay child support he paided. Why should he pay for child support when she made a agreement
I would feel sorry for the parents if they couldn't have children and this was their only option but they already had 3 children why were they so desperate for a 4? Also they shouldn't have used her egg then because then it just creates a liability because it is now her child.
That's why the surrogate must have not have blood ties to the child
Giving birth is hard and giving that baby up even if it isn't hers is difficult, but she should not do that
Dear God
You go to be kidding me. I don't fee for both sides. They should have received their children.
Sorry to hear about it. It is really sad news for the parents. I think parents did it for illegally? i also have a child through surrogate. We have bee gone through legal process. We didn't face such problems. Also our surrogate was quite helping. I hope this dispute will be solved soon.
Split custody
Actually, this is so sad. Before you go for surrogacy you should make a legal contract. In this case, the child is with the mother. The one and only mother. She's the mother of her genes, the mother who nurtured her in the womb and raised her. There is nothing anyone can do about it.
Yes but the father should have rights as well it’s his child too. I personally think they should have split custody that way the child can be with both parents equally.
Jamie has the biological rights to the child. It’s her egg her baby
They should never have used the surrogates egg.
j'ai kiffé