7 Tips for Helping Someone Out of a Cult
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- Опубликовано: 14 мар 2018
- (Cedars' vlog no. 201) In response to a request from my Patreon backers, I share my top 7 tips for helping someone out of a cult. While there is no magic bullet for helping Jehovah's Witnesses realize they are being lied to, there are a number of approaches and techniques that will make the task considerably less ominous.
Timestamps (Credit: TomofHelatrobus)
00:01:19 1. Dial down your expectations
00:02:53 2. Remember what it was like when you were waking up from a cult
00:04:01 3. Exploit opportunities, don't force them
00:07:25 4. Compare and contrast with other cults
00:09:05 5. Make truth the central issue
00:10:52 6. Offer an olive branch
00:12:11 7. Kill the stereotype
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Good job! I am an ex-Mormon and those of us who have gotten out of high-demand religions (cults) have so much in common.
I'm currently a Mormon and have never felt that a lot is being demanded of me by the religion, but I think a lot of my natural inclinations conform with what is expected by the religion itself. I think anyone who finds themselves living a belief system that is counter to their preferences should definitely get out of it. I've watched my brother do it, and it took him some time, but he found happiness in his life. The religion wasn't providing it, so why the hell would I expect him to stick around? I wouldn't.
I'm sure if Mormonism were as strict as the JWs though most of my thoughts and opinions would be considered apostate and I'd be kicked out by now though.
Somewhat true but the difference is Mormonism doesn't care what you do as long as your paying your 10%
@@jordanneal576 my opportunity in the church is so demanding and harmful 👁👄👁
I am constantly being told to seek out my own answers to questions and develop my own relationship with God in the Mormon church. There is no shunning or divisive teachings like a cult. The most cultish thing is that people are passionate and want others to join.
Since my wife loves children, I tried the child abuse angle (even showed her a CNN video), but that wasn’t enough for her. Eventually, after a calm discussion, I told her about my fears of shunning and how that may affect our kids if they became witnesses. I told her if one of them decided to leave then all the work we put in for them to be close goes down the drain once mandatory shunning goes into effect- that opened her heart and mind. She then expressed issues she had the Org but didn’t to express. She said that she even questioned the elders about beards, since I had grown one, and they couldn’t give her a scriptural reason. We are now all out. Great points!!
WT COLLECTOR I am, especially since she had a lot more to lose. Her mom and step dad are Witnesses and she had a lot of friends. She’s a people person and she no longer has her social network. She’s unofficially out, so her mom still talks to her, but lost all her friends. Surprisingly, she’s doing better than expected.
WT COLLECTOR Thanks!!!
evan church have peddos evan chotlic church have many peddos
mikael brodin it’s not about that- it’s about HOW it’s handled. Watch the Australian Royal Commission.
Wotiknow Now Hey you never know. My wife got in when she was a kid, so it was decades of indoctrination- so keep hope alive. Best to you!!
Why did it take me 25 years to wake up? That is what haunts me the most.
Yes, be kind, no matter what, and you will feel good because kindness is always the right thing.
From my experience, you can't wake someone up unless they either want to wake up, or already have doubts. I've helped two of my relatives wake up, but they approached me, and they didn't do it by approaching me with the intention to leave the cult, but to challenge me as to why I left, and having that conversation watered the seeds that allowed them to eventually leave the cult as well. The important thing is that THEY wanted to have that conversation, THEY were genuinely interested in my reasons for leaving, which tells me they already had their doubts. The rest of my family doesn't want to hear my reasons, they avoid that conversation as much as possible and I know they won't wake up, so I won't even try anymore.
My wife went back in a couple years ago. She'd been DFed before we met. She was done with the org until a couple years. After a conversation with one of her witness friends, I realized, what if these people did want out? Who would they contact? I've considered printing up card stock into pseudo business cards to give out whenever I chat with a witness.
I don't expect them to see the card and contact me. In fact, I would be fine if all of them found their way into the trash. Because if there's a chance I could help just one person, I think it would be worth it. Keep up the good work Richard!
I understand why you would feel that way, but I would hope that you might try to be available in case that changes at some point. Sometimes it is the smallest thing that raises doubt, even after someone has been in a cult for many years - because other things have been building up subconsciously - or sometimes it is a big thing: like the cult leader rapes them or something. My point is that you never know when someone you care about might suddenly be open for a conversation, and so giving up on them entirely could end up meaning that you are not there when they need you and do want help.
Good tips, especially tip number 7 "Kill the stereotype"! It's so important for us who want to help family and loved ones still trapped inside the organization, to let them see that we are kind and loving people instead of angry and bitter apostates.
Yeah, it got ugly with my mom the other day. Luckily, mom just said "I don't ask you, so don't discourage me." After 43 years in the Watchtower my mom tells the elders who she is going to speak to or not. When I was disfellowshipped as a young person, she basically told them, I was her daughter and no one is going to make her stop talking to me. It was difficult for her and my dad and I went through the reinstatement procedure for them.....right before I faded and never returned.
I was a Seventh day Adventist, and I am hoping many will come out from this cult
yes in Jesus' name.
This just may be my favorite John Cedars video yet. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Dear Lloyd! I know 3 JW individuals who committed suicide-all of whom I grew up with to some extent. My parents live quite some distance away, and my mother has lived a lifetime of regrets and severe depression. One of her greatest regrets centers around the fact that we never had a true home, we lived in tiny flats or apartments because “the End” would be here at any moment. My father is a prominent elder and is pushing for me to attend this year’s Memorial. I doubt I could stomach it. I have thought long & hard about what to say and how to respond to my parents. I feel that, at their now rather advanced age, it would quite possibly be too much for them to handle to realize that they have spent 7 decades sacrificing for nothing. At the same time, it drives me crazy to see how they spend money they don’t have on certain items such as iPads, because the “Society” wants them to use them in the “Ministry,” while they go without some of the more basic pleasures in life, and etc. It is infuriating. Anyway, I will try to employ some of theses tips without having any real expectations. Thank you again for the work you do!
Oh, and I’m a fader who is incognito-although for how much longer I do not know. Was, unfortunately, baptized as a youngster/minor in 1983. I believe THAT contract should be rendered invalid, like so many others who felt the very real pressure to get baptized or be considered, “weak!”
Did you ever talk to your grandparents about it I want to tell my grandma but i think it would be too much at her 76 yeara of age
Alex Tapia my parents are in their 80’s. If I express any doubts or sound as though I am questioning anything whatsoever, there is a high likelihood of great upset and shunning.
This guy is so smart. Thanks for the advice! Some of his tips can apply to addicts and toxic relationships too.
I really enjoy your videos! I am just waking up although I haven't been to a meeting or "out in service" in almost a year my disfellowshipped son sent me information that I researched and was awakened. So glad I listened to him! Two of my grandkids are still in there with their mother. :( So worried for them. This information is very helpful. Please keep doing what you do. This information is SO helpful to us all.
omg I'm praying I was in it and someone helped me out
I love your channel! I was raised LDS and left the church a few years ago after a laps in faith. You (and the other two apostates)have helped me recognize the depth of my 30+ year indoctrination and I can’t thank you enough. As you know, mind control is a tricky thing to undue and although your channel is based on JW the result of undue influence is the same. Thanks for all the work you do and for helping me figure out me. On a side note..I just have to say, after watching you’re shows over the last few years, you have done a beautiful job on your remodel!
( **** PLEASE READ THIS **** )
Thank you Lloyd for this particular video. I have a close family member, who has been in this JW cult since about year 2000. He is an elder, and a very successful well-known businessman here in San Antonio. He has perfectly followed their rules of not talking to me ever since then. He now has some SERIOUS personal problems which had recently materialized (which makes me look like Jesus). I strongly believe that his so-called "friends" don't fully know about it. I had just recently texted him twice this week (for the first time ever) to politely have a chat. No response. This video here is a God-send to me. That made a BIG difference to my own mental well-being, especially your 3rd tip of not having high expectations. And a big thank you to the Patreons for supporting you. I want to become a fellow Patreon soon.
Glad you read this. And oddly enough, just an hour after I wrote this - he texted me back! I kept your tips in mind as I replied back to him (pragmatically) on what was going on with me, and not so directed at him. He did not reply back to that immediately yet, but that's alright for now. I'm keeping that communication bridge open. And I'm personally feeling better already. Thanks again from San Antonio!
Im going to try and help my parents even though im only 13. They need to know the bad things about JW's
I don't envy your predicament, but your will to help your parents is very admirable. Good luck!
Be careful indoctrination can make people do things that you would never expect them capable of doing. The best thing you can do is work on yourself. If you become someone who is emotionally healthy and able to take care of yourself you will be in better shape to help your parents. Good luck.
^ Yes, this is good advice. A careful approach would be good for you at this point in your life. By all means do what you can, but don't do anything that will make your situation worse. Grow as a person, learn things, and give yourself the tools to become independent when the time is right.
GOOD LUCK!!!!! You're a smart kid!
Be very careful. I would make plans for myself. Being a teen is hard. Be sure to develop normal friends. Focus on education. If you want to go to college, you need to take the academic track. If you want a trade, you need to develop it. Only you know what your parents are like. My mom dropped the Witnesses when I asked her as a teen. One never knows for certain how a person will react. You could reference objective facts without stating a disloyalty to the WT. It took me many efforts to leave emotionally. My big toe would get wet and I would run back to my parents. Gradually, I did more and more. Normal things felt awkward in the beginning. I pretended to be a friend who grew up in a normal environment. You should be proud that you are so aware at your age. Children have legal rights to be their own persons. This area of law has changed a lot in the last few decades. I wish you the best.
Great to see you in front of the bookshelf again.
My sister-in-law is on the cusp of joining the Jehovah's Witnesses.
This advice is rather relevant for me.
A little more detail, in case someone would like to suggest more help.
I live in Oregon, she and her husband (my older brother) live in California. We stay in touch over FaceBook, mainly.
My brother is not religious, but does buy into nearly every conspiracy theory - chemtrails, anti-vaxx, anti-chemo. You name it, he believes it.
They've had a rocky marriage, so I think that my sister-in-law finds familial comfort in the Jehovah's Witnesses. I'm not sure how to explain it to her that she's trading one corrupted relationship for another.
I've tried to explain to her that the claims the bible makes are physically impossible and her only reply was "god can do anything". I was unable to get her to question her own retort.
Any advice?
Jeremy Higgins if you can explain the many false predictions from the JWs like 1975, would be a valid point. Even a little information can help, don’t try to burry her with information at first. Hope this might help, all the best!
Not being religious myself, I haven't taken the time to research any falsehoods pushed by the Jehovah's Witnesses.
Is there anything like a handy reference I can start from?
Excellent advice. So many times when we wake up we want to run to our loved ones with so many facts and we're passionate. They immediately shut down because they're afraid and if they were being influenced by Satan and their faith is being tested. The best thing that we can do is give them a little facts bit by bit and be very kind and understanding. Just like you said at one time we were in their position. Thanks again for the great tips.
zoeyhillion THIS
I wish i showed this to my family before my mother got super religious, now i don't know what to do I'm an atheist, but I come from an extremely religious family. I don't know how I realized that i was wrong. I was always open to different opinions and view-points, I can thank this channel, DarkMatter2525, TJKirk, Armored Skeptic, and Telltale Atheist for dragging me out around 6 months ago. However I am only 14 and have another 4 years before I can move away or have an excuse to spend less time talking about religion. I don't know how long i can fake religiousness for and I find myself occasionaly slip up. I love vidoies like these, they keep me sane. From the deepest pit of my heart, thank you.
Anon Y. Mous
I wish you the best , and I can relate
Stay strong man continue being a good person but dont let false religions take you down
I hope things have been getting better, and that you've been well during this whole pandemic thing. Hopefully you are starting to have a bit more independence - in some places, 16 is old enough to make more decisions for yourself. Good luck!
Thank you for helping me to "wake up". My sister recommended your videos to me because of your kind and genuine approach.
Great advice Lloyd and it's advice that I would have been unable to take or agree with when first I left the cult. Having lost my wife, children, home "friends " and life as I knew it, I was driven by anger. The softly softly approach that you advocate is the best way to go when trying to help someone get out of watchtower or any other cult. Sometimes it is best to say nothing at all. We (apostates) are expected to be confrontational and irrational. Our demeanor can be our best tool to show cult members that we are not demons. I'm very sure that this video will help many to help those still in watchtowers grip. For me the best point that you made was that either it's true or it isn't. And we know that it's a crock, thank you Lloyd and keep up the excellent work.
When one is angry and feels betrayed, it is hard to be soft. Kindness is a virtue. The anger has to be directed somewhere.
True, but it helps to remind oneself how many of us used to view apostates - I vaguely remember an loud, angry mob outside a convention hall when I was little and it was very scary for a 9 year old...it may have confirmed WT indoctrination during my upbringing und undermined my critical thinking for even longer as I only got out in my 40s :-( Lloyd is spot on...fight cults with kindness and compassion!
You are so kind. You're simply an amazing person, so much inner light and strength.
I was almost a JW. I have been a bible study of an elder for 1 and half year. Attended meetings, circuit assembly and conventions oh and memorial too. At first it was ok but as the time goes by the elders will interfere with my private life. My aunt was disappointed I did not marry a JW woman and now she is about to shun me. I hope she wakes up, she’s a JW for about 35 years or more. Keep up the great work! Im waiting for JW to knock on our door , I cant wait to show your videos to them.
ive been watching leah remini and scientology with my wife and while there are big differences there are policies like the way they protect the org and shunning. and its a real eye opener. she is finding it very emotional to watch. im dying to say, LOOK that exactly what jw does, but no, she is smart, she can make the connection :)
Well it is going to get a lot more uncomfortable when Leah starts on the JW's this season! YAY!!!!
I often find myself in tears watching Leah Remini. It is going to be interesting how she handles Jehovah's Witnesses. There are so many parallels. Granted Scientology is worse.
Kevin, you deserve thousands of more followers than you currently have. Your videos are non confrontational, informative, and most importantly, comedic gold. I just showed a current doubting JW and a faded JW your video on The Bethel Boy and Pillowgate, and we all just about died of laughter. You have my heartfelt thanks, and please keep up the good work.
Moses_Freebird thank you :) kind words indeed
Wotiknow Now I’ve woken up and my wife doesn’t know. Was it difficult “coming out” to your wife initially?
Absolutely right about needing to feel in control and give yourself permission to look behind the curtains. Noone could have made me see it.
All of this is so important. I've watched it 3 times and I think if I could just do these 7 steps it would give me the best chance of waking up some of my family. Actually doing it and not outing yourself as apostate is the hard part.
Also with family members its hard to not get emotional. I have never DARED speak to my parents about this but I tried with my sister a couple of times and she turned into a banshee, I didnt recognise her. She wouldn't let me speak she kept shouting over me, dragging things up from years ago that I had said or done or hadnt done rather than give an actual answer to what I asked. She succeeded in getting a rise out of me after half and hour I lost my temper with the nonsense she was spouting and how mean she was being and not listening to me even though I listened to her. Its hard to stay calm when someone wont let you finish your sentences!
My wife says "you just see things that way because you dont believe" regardless of what the actual topic is. Frustrating!! Thanks for your channel and insight Mr.Evans
I left a cult two years ago, it was such a difficult process but I’m so grateful to be free! Lloyd offers such excellent, spot on advice. It fits perfectly even though mine was a different cult (the ‘no name church’ which has maybe a couple million members). All my dear family members are still buying into this spiritual fraud and they may see me as a lost sheep. I continue to show them love despite the hurt and I hope one day they may have their eyes opened to see through the establishment and continue to be Christians outside of the legalistic, controlling environment of the group.
Y E S
I love that leaving a cult doesn't necessarily mean that you stop believing in your God, it just means you stopped believing in the humans that caged you in what they wanted you to believe in.
Another brilliant video. Keep up the great work 💝
Totally agree with "kill the stereotype".. I've come to the place that I no longer want to convince anyone to leave.. but I am happy to be a support for them if they choose to leave. I like the reminder to basically be a good, kind, loving person for yourself, not to manipulate another person... great video!
I cant wait to write my awakening story...scariest and almost deadly experience...I want to help others so their story can be easier!
I'm interested in hearing it Ms Medina
You are so wonderful. Thank you for all you do. Your concise and reasonable videos are fantastic and mean so much to so many of us. You've saved so many people. It makes me so frustrated that jws *think* they're saving people and apostates are evil, when ready they're making "good seem bad, and bad seem good". Please keep up the incredible work.
I wish I could be an effective activist like you. I miss my family. I miss community. This makes me feel much less alone.
The real value of these videos is deprogramming people that have left the cult and/or serve as a warning for those who might be being sold or pressured to join
Hi Lewis! I’ve been watching for a while, and I’ve just decided now that I’m going to leave Jehovah’s witnesses in 9 months! Thanks for all the inspiration and help with waking up :)
My mother is a JW and joined when I was in my late teens, so over 30 yrs, she is anything but kind or loving and she ruined my younger brothers live with this cult.
He ended up on drink and drugs and the mental abuse put on him by her and her desire to engage him in her cult has left me bitter towards her to this day.
I definitely agree with all of these tips! Especially about not forcing the issue, but being ready to take the opportunity when THEY bring it up, because they inevitably will. This can be so difficult sometimes when you just want them to know everything you know. But patience, calmness and kindness is definitely key. Thanks for putting this together for all of us!
This is so timely, having just accessed this particular video of yours. By the way I’ve watched many of your presentations and find each one encouraging. The work you have so tirelessly pursued regarding pedophiles in the organization is stellar. Thank you Loyd.
I searched for "tips on making a cult" and found this
I'm very thankful for the great job you have been done. You dont imagine how much I appreciate it.
I quit the Seventh Day Adventist Church, which I believe is the slightly older sister of the Jehovah's Witnesses.
Well put Sir! This is incredibly practical advice for someone who is actually trying, or hoping, to wake someone up from a cult (as opposed to someone viewing the feat from the position of an academic or spectator). The endeavor is SO MUCH more than comparing conflicting narratives in an honest forum, and going from there!
In addition to a few rather important external sources, there were several 'active' JWs who very casually brought up questions and issues, in a nonthreatening atmosphere, who really got me to think about what kind of ideology I was subscribing to.
Most helpful video I’ve watched so far on this. Thank you.
I find if I respect my loved ones choices, don't appear to be judgmental, and use kindness, this makes our relationship better. Also showing character and integrity gives them no reason to find fault with me. All your points are very helpful. Please keep doing these videos, helping people cope with these issues.
Wonderfully done! And oh my....your voice! It's like butter. I am so thankful for you sharing your advice here.
Good video. I have a hard time trying to explain certain aspects of my past with the troubled teen industry here in America. A lot of people are unaware of how predominate this stuff is. Thank you for all the great work you do.
Great video, Lloyd! Good luck to those trying to help others get out of a cult. My prayers are with you. Ask questions that you can refute with hard information.
No point praying..Lloyd is an agnostic atheist :-)
Absolute gold! Thanks for this.
Rational and kind. Great approach :)
1. Dial down your expectations 1:19
2. Remember what it was like when you were waking up from a cult 2:53
3. Exploit opportunities, don't force them 4:01
4. Compare and contrast with other cults 7:25
5. Make truth the central issue 9:05
6. Offer an olive branch 10:52
7. Kill the stereotype 12:11
I like this video. It's helpful to those of us wanted to get loved ones out. My wife was DFed when we met, and eventually married. She started "missing" the feeling of being part of a "community" so she went back in. At first she was taking the kids with her while I was at work.
I eventually won that battle. Now that they are secure, I'd like to get her out. Here's my status with your advice...
1. I've done this. The head-on approach didn't work, so I'd dial it back. (See 6.)
2. I was never in, so this doesn't apply, but I can try to imagine.
3. The other day JWs were canvassing our street when we were getting home. Being from my wife's congregation, she pulled over to chat. I spoke with the witness, starting out with questions. Once she felt comfortable with light conversation, I eventually got her to admit she's actively shunning her daughter. I told her I felt sorry for the both of them. (Long story.) She admitted, when I asked if her daughter ever called her on the phone, if she'd answer it. "No, no I wouldn't." I apologized again. I remembered you and your father, Lloyd. And I said to her: "That's terrible, imagine what it would be like never seeing your grandchildren because of this organization." My wife acted like none of the heady parts of our conversation bothered her. But it gave me good practice talking to a witness.
4. I've heard this several times, about documentaries on Netflix about Scientology. I need to find a way to make it not so obvious.
5. This is difficult for her. She denies that they use loaded language. Our kids have admitted to her that she does, but she's in denial. It's like she's two different people.
6. I've been considering going to meetings or the convention with her. We had a discussion a few days ago, where she said I shouldn't listen to or read apostate sites. So I've been compiling a playlist of former JWs who aren't the extremists she's been lead to believe they are.
7. One of the main reasons I never would debate witnesses before, is I didn't want to play into their persecution complex. I didn't want to come across as confrontational. What I found, is it's best to build a rapport. Start out by asking how their service is going, since you're likely encountering them while they're trying to recruit. If you come out and ask about shunning people for going to a birthday party, they are likely to either lie to you, or shut down, and their "pit boss" may pay you a visit. So I recommend you start light, then build your way up. Ask about baptism, and ask about the lifelong commitment. Then get to shunning. Ask if they've ever been required to shun. Just go from there.
Good luck!
Great video - thanks for sharing these tips!
Thank you so much for this video!
Thanks for your video mate
Awesome, great advice, gonna put these tips in use. THANK YOU!!!
Great advice Lloyd!
SuperB tips, I thought I could snap my family out of it just as easily when my eyes opened. They are under a pretty powerful spell.
Especially your tip about respect fully applies to me, I find it very hard to stay calm and respectful about it.
I just love your intro song lol so uplifting and awakening
I have a friend who is very dear to me who I've been trying to figure out how to help. I grew up kind of cult adjacent, but not in a cult. This had been super informative.
Best informative youtube video. Thank you!
This very helpful thank you!
Thank you so much I’m atheist my wife’s still in Jws .. she hasn’t made love to me in over 3yrs .... she says I’m trying to take from her the only thing she truly has .. and I can feel what she’s feeling .. I will use you tips and give it more time
My husband told me once before we got married that the JWs were a cult. We got married and I tried to prove to him it wasn't a cult. I did so much research for about 7 years and then last year I came to the conclusion and told him yeah its a cult. 🤣 luckily I never got baptized.
Excellent advice thank you!!
I was a part of AA for 8 years. So this title hits home with me
It's easier for an abused wife to leave her marriage (and we know how hard that is). The abuser's insidious power penetrates your mind and spirit. He convinces you that if you leave, no one else will ever want you because you're unworthy and unable to function witthout him.
And if you have financial dependency, you feel more trapped.
These women become expert apologists for their abusers - saying they're just imperfect, it's not that bad, things will get better, they'll trust fate or God, want to be loyal because this person did so much for them at some point in the past.
This reasoning applies to cult member logic. You won't convince the woman that her husband is a monster. She has to get tired of it and want out - badly.
these are great tips my friend
Thank you for the tips!
I'm working on my kids and their mother. This articulates extremely well the approach I strive to take. I feel like I'm making some wonderful progress. Thank you for thinking video, and thanks to your patrions! You guys rock!
Thank you. GOD BLESS YOU.
thank you john i was in the prosperity cults for over 30 years
What does your T-shirt say Lloyd?
Great video! Very ‘timely reminders’ (lol).
Wish this video was available 20 years ago. Quite good points there indeed.
Great video. I think in general that it is hard to convert any religious groups not just cults. I think we have to dial our expectations when it comes to any religion
Lloyd I think I have become an undercover bible study! It happened so fast but I wanted to use the way you spoke to the JW in Disneyworld of asking non-attacking questions to make them think. Unlike that brother, these sisters at my door would not even mention how God was going to act to bring about a new world, they skirted around the answer to the point of excusing themselves and offerig to show me scriptures next week to explain as 'it was not a quick answer'
I will try this, in the hope that we can get ourselves out of this Covidiot Cult.
I’m going to use some of these tips to my friend in a pyramid scheme, I’m convinced her “business opportunity”’is costing her a fortune
I’m trying to help my daughter and her bf get out of SCJ cult. They moved in together far away from us but she’s still texting us once in a while. Thanks for the tips.
So very true on all counts...especially tip 4. Leah Remini one is excellent and helped some of my loved ones just naturally make connections. Then when ready showed them you, critical thinkers, Susan Gaskin, and or Miss Mowse. All good since not very confrontational but more digestible to aggressive types...like the lovely couple in New Mexico.
Thank you
You must've been a real golden individual when leaving the cult and telling your wife and she did not leave you.
Thanks for the practical advice, I received an unsolicited letter from a JW recently. This will help with my reply.
Well reasoned. I'll try to keep this in mind when JWs come to my door.
Have you ever reached out to Megan Phelps-Roper, outspoken but respectful apostate of Westboro? I'd love to see an interview or collab.
John, PLEASE do an interview with Anthony Magnabosco. I think his techniques are incredibly helpful with coming to "the truth".
Very helpful Lloyd, thanks. I want to learn to help as much as I can. Anyone know of other videos and /or written information on how to help others out of the JW CULT ?
Most people change slowly, even if they're not involved in a cult, I'd say.
Really agree with the kill the stereotype advice. Not easy though. 💕
Compromise, compromise, compromise. Whether we like it or not. For people we love ❤️ in the org.
my first doubts come up when i saw a documentary about mormons in tv and how much similaritys whe have
And as always, thank you for watching.
Gotta go with #4 minus season 3 special
7 tips to stop in 1'everlasting life, 2 perfect health, 3. Loved ones ressurected, 4 jehovah will speak to us persanaly, 5' we will all make no mistakes, 6 cant wait 7'its gonna be wonderfull,
Making the offer to prove their religion right can be tricky. Cults internal reality is twisted and they only slowly let you in once you begin responding to their tricks
I am 14 and I really want to get my uncle’s & Grandma out of the jehovah witnesses cult… My uncle’s has been in the cult since 14 and I wouldn’t want to hurt him by letting him know what the tea really is about jehovah witnesses but at the same time I want them to have freedom in life bcz I really care about them and love them🥺 I am going to try it anyway bcz I want my uncle’s & grandma to have freedom in life…💕
I AM EX JW AND I JUST LOVE YOUR VIEOS THANKS
Have you thought about creating a video on how JW’s deal with members dealing with addiction? My 70 year old father was disfellowshipped when he got addicted to his pain pills. His life quickly went downhill after that and died a few months later. They never even checked on him even after I begged them to help me. Opioid addiction is a national crisis, I’m sure there are more stories like his.
So sorry to hear
Oh yes. Love around the world. Hahaha. I went to Spain and they gave my Black face the cold shoulder because I was there for summer studying the Spanish language. I went 3 times and then decided, they were too cold. Love around the world? Please. You can't even get love at the local level consistently.
I happen to think that the word ;Cult, should be extended to other forms of group thinking also.There are so many forms of brain washing when you really deeply start scrutinizing the world around you.
I was never a baptized JW, but i grew up in a family of 30 odd people whom were all JW's. I put my foot down at 12 and said i'm not going to another meeting. I had been waiting for that day for half of my life at that point. Somehow, 12 seemed very "grown up" to me when i was 6, and although i didn't feel grown up at 12, i still dared to stand up for myself then. It became the turning point for the whole family in many ways. I could write at great length about that, but it would become a book, so just to make it understandable in short terms where i'm heading at with that thought is, Politics.
The ONE thing that i did take with me, throughout my life, from the JW's, is, i never trusted the system..(and it never gave me a reason to trust it) , and i have always been capable of seeing through the lies of the system thanks to the JW's. So, in an odd kind of way, i am grateful to them for that.
I find it extremely "funny", in a way, that this system; (that accepts and allows religious freedom, and freedom to practice their religion in the way that they see fit (with JW's not doing for example Military service nor voting) ;later on do not understand, that as you have grown up in a CULT, that brain washed you to NOT vote, or be involved in this WORLDLY system in any way, you have BECOME that way. You started thinking that way. If you'd say, -I AM a JW and i won't vote because of my religion, then people will say ..Oh..ok then, fair enough. But if you say, I am NOT a JW, but i grew up as one, and was told all my life that politics is a load of ballony and now i actually believe it having seen the system throughout my life..well, then that's NOT acceptable..to the system. Because, now i am/have NO religion at all, and i never will have, because i un-brainwashed myself from religions..and as i grew up, i still learned that the JW's were right about the system of politics..they're just liars. Ironically, exactly the same way as the JW's are, excluding the God part.
It's a funny tricky thing this..Does anybody else find themselves with the same "dilemma"?
No. I believe we have a moral responsibility to be involved in civic affairs. When we are not involved, dictators and corrupt people rule. My friends hold public office. One is a former JW who was in my congregation. We were raised to see that the world was bad. True, there are bad governments. We also need to acknowledge all the civil rights and liberties that western democracies have. Not every country allows one to leave a religion or political cult. One of the main reasons I left the Witnesses was their constant statements that the United States and Great Britain were just as bad as the Nazis and other Axis powers. I longed to be a political activist and consider myself part of the political civil rights movement. We were encouraged to be snarky to the world. Sophistication is not a bad thing in itself. Besides the Witness, I blame the fact that public schools cut back on civics and history education. Wealthy people emphasize civic engagement. I worked hard to be part of the conversation. Maybe it is age-related. I grew up with strong advocates on TV and the national stage during the civil rights movement and protests against Viet Nam. Donald Trump does give one pause, however. If I do not advocate, other people will determine my life choices. People who stand on the side get screwed.
Janice Hussock very well put. Politics is a muddy terrain but if you don't make yourself part of the conversation you have no way to change that conversation one day. Thank you for this true testimony.
Quick question. I’ve watched your early videos about turning in your disassociation letter, as well as the video about helping your wife wake up. Were you frightened to share your initial doubts with your wife? Nervous to let her know you were going to be inactive?
Very much so, but I reasoned the issue needed to be addressed sooner or later.
John Cedars Thanks Loyd. I came clean with my wife and had a bit of an emotional breakdown, which for me is extremely out of character. She was extremely receptive and had a few questions. She’s respecting my choice to fade out, but promised her I’d help for the time being with our newborn. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Bro she needs to be saved fam I’m scared 😭😭😭😭
Of course, one of the first things to look for, is how honestly they believe what they believe. An honest believer will be much easier to get through to than someone who truly has "faith". Because, as Aron Ra says, "Faith is the most dishonest position that it is possible to have."