Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda: The Nagging Problem of Incompletions - The Clutter Fairy Weekly

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  • Опубликовано: 2 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 50

  • @katherinetwilliams4254
    @katherinetwilliams4254 2 года назад +9

    One of the best gifts a coworker gave me years ago was to stop my obsessing over what needed to be done and list and celebrate what was already accomplished.. that’s become a new pattern…to first celebrate what is complete and then break down the next tasks into smaller increments.

  • @jeannebowes2898
    @jeannebowes2898 2 года назад +7

    We are finally recovering from a plumbing disaster where two baths had to be totally redone. It has taken nearly two years, step by step. I no Longer do crafts, arts, sewing. Supplies were sold or donated many many years ago. We just garden, enough for us. We keep up with the property maintenance, especially important for seniors as well as a clutter free lifestyle. We continue to make improvements as well, leftovers are donated to the Home Resource center promptly. I enjoy your talks as a checklist.

  • @tennesseenana4838
    @tennesseenana4838 2 года назад +8

    I like to think of certain projects as the example of trying to eat an elephant. It can be done - just one bite at a time. There's no way I can sit and knit a sweater at one time. But I can knit a few inches in one sitting. Your video made me remember about a lady I knew. She called herself the queen of the unfinished projects. I finally found out why she never finished any of them. She thought that once one of her art projects were finished, they would be open to criticism of them - ie her, and she couldn't handle that.

  • @nancylanderson8012
    @nancylanderson8012 2 года назад +6

    You gave us good food for thought. I love the idea of doing things in smaller time limits. I always felt I had to do as much as possible and then get overwhelmed. Thank you for that idea.

  • @rebeccariordan6391
    @rebeccariordan6391 2 года назад +18

    I had someone tell me once 'you could be blessing someone else by asking them to help you, especially if you're paying them'.

  • @kennethbailey9853
    @kennethbailey9853 2 года назад +6

    Couldnt wait to see and hear you today

  • @paulineince6433
    @paulineince6433 Год назад +4

    Hi Gayle and Ed thanks for all the motivation! I have been listening to you while decluttering and have
    . now got 4 large sacks of things ready for when the charity shops reopen. Haven’t finished yet. Hoping for at least one more sack.

  • @ruthcopely7695
    @ruthcopely7695 Год назад +4

    When I bring in the mail, I remain standing so I can walk over to the recycling bin for junk mail and then place bills in my pay bills spot. That keeps the momentum going and I can deal with mail efficiently each day. Love your podcasts! 💖

  • @wandayonder9772
    @wandayonder9772 2 года назад +5

    I'm back on board after not decluttering for six months, and have watched all the episodes I missed to get me in the mood.
    The restart is prompted by my adult children saying they don't feel able to deal with sorting my things when I go, even though that may not be for twenty years or so. They worry that if something happens unexpectedly, they'll be stuck with the job. That's just the incentive I need to get back to it!
    So now I'm able to sort with an eye to what will happen to this or that random thing if some stranger has to judge and sort it when I'm gone. I've made a small start and decisions are much easier when seen so objectively, when each item has no history or sentiment attached. The sorting still takes time though.
    I'll do as much as I can by the end of the year and reassess then. Current topics here are exactly right for what I'm doing. Thank you!

    • @suzanbak1
      @suzanbak1 2 года назад +1

      Good brave communication with your children👍🏼

  • @jeanolson1304
    @jeanolson1304 2 года назад +5

    I liked the explanation about finite/ infinite projects. My spouse makes them all infinite!

  • @kimtownsend838
    @kimtownsend838 Год назад +6

    You inspire me as I go through your videos and my large hoard.
    But I often hear you say take things that are to go out, once sorted to the car, I don't drive, I live in the UK. We have to make appointments for the refuse tip ever since covid, also our charity shops do not want a lot of certain things anymore as so many donations have been made since covid, so I feel stuck as really don't want to add to landfill, the guilt of that doesnt help either.I am long-term sick 58 and have whole weeks were I am medicated and can't cope, have very little money to barely scrape by on and you constantly refer to paying others to do the work for you.
    I also have a really bad mould room situation and have been waiting for almost a year and a half for the council to sort it out. So that I can make it into my craft/ office/ wardrobe as our houses do not have closets or basements and are tiny.
    Please consider that we are not all equal in finance, health physical or mental ability we also don't all have people who can help us.
    I find myself tuning out when you dont consider these factors.
    Thank you for all the inspiration 😊

    • @smoofollowingqalroundthewo206
      @smoofollowingqalroundthewo206 Год назад +1

      Kim, I used to live in the UK, and understand your challenges with council/charity shops/etc. I suggest you post on Facebook marketplace or your local church (even Co-op/pub board) what you were thinking of donating. Your village/town likely has its own FB page. Post there what you need help with. Don’t rely in the council (sadly); get your handy neighbors involved. 🙏🏻❤️. You’ll be surprised at how people want to help, just don’t know how! 🙂

    • @boog.2751
      @boog.2751 Год назад +3

      I understand some of your situation. Lived in a tiny home with one small closet for years. I didn't know that there was mold making me sick. I started throwing away everything in the basement when i found the mold.i was able to get out of there eventually but have health issues for life. If you can do a little bit each day it does slowly help. Years ago, I helped a friend declutter and clean her deveased parents very large 5 bedroom 3 bath home for 3 days before the closing date that is was being sold. She hd to spend over $3000 American Dollard to have 4 large trucks hul stuff and trash away that we piled in there. The local thrift store would no longer take our donations as we had filled up their spaces already. So I started putting things on the front yard with a big free sign. A neighbor called his antique collector friends and they took half for their store. Neighbors took the rest.We just had to get it all out and not worry about the money she lost by not taking time to sell it all. We spent the last day cleaning the entire home as there had been mice in the house all winter. I did not get any money for all of my work except pizza for breakfast, lunch and dinner that week. I just knew my friend needed help immediately. I hope you can find a helper. Gd bless you

  • @loventa
    @loventa 2 года назад +5

    Hey Clutter Fairy! I’ve listened to you for the last two years and I kept thinking about how you said rooms didn’t have to be the rooms they came as. We can make our rooms work for what we want to do with them.
    So I’ve finally made our guest room / office / art studio into my office / art studio. We had guests stay twice in the last two years we’ve lived here. I no longer felt it was valuable to keep the queen size bed in there for guests when guests rarely come over! I had my art studio in there too but everything was so cramped that I never wanted to paint in there. We recycled the mattress this past weekend and the office / art studio is so much bigger! I actually started painting in there and it feels much better with the extra space. Now I have one section of the room as my home office for remote work and the other section of the room is my art studio. I’ve also for the last month been decluttering and reorganizing things. I’ve made custom boxes out of cardboard and wrapping it with black craft paper - makes everything look higher end since it’s all the same look. I also have a degree in illustration / fine arts and work in the design field so it’s nice to have a space in the house dedicated to my craft. And now I can make paintings to decorate our house since we don’t have much art on the walls!
    Thanks, Clutter Fairy for helping me realize rooms can be what I want them to be and make them work for me. :)
    (My partner’s family was shocked when we told them we got rid of the bed in our only spare room. We have a two bedroom house.)

    • @TheClutterFairy
      @TheClutterFairy  2 года назад +1

      Love it! You’ve made your house be useful to you!

  • @Sheryl777
    @Sheryl777 2 года назад +4

    I have an upstairs bedroom that was used mostly by 3 sibling cats, and boy did they ever make a mess up there! I'm going to probably have to hire out some of the work like walls they scratched, and a windowsill they pretty much destroyed by chewing on one side of it, but the rest of it I can (slowly) do by myself. I mean I'm having to wash walls and the ceiling because it's been so long since any of that was done. So I'm taking it a little at a time every day, and the parts I've cleaned look SO much better that it encourages me to try to take a little time every day to work on it. Eventually I will finish, but not in a big hurry though.

  • @CM-wh8hn
    @CM-wh8hn 2 года назад +5

    This program was so enlightening! Especially, the idea of focusing only on the immediate one small part, and not wasting time trying to figure a" perfect plan" for a big project. It is so helpful (and freeing) for me, for the first time, to intentionally IGNORE the "end goal". I can see how this relates to other things as well... like weight loss. It always fails for me to figure out a plan on how to lose 50 lbs. But I know I can completely focus on losing just 5 pounds. (, and then after that , focus on 5 lbs again). Likewise, a huge project, like a cluttered kitchen is overwhelming, But I can declutter one kitchen cabinet at a time. I just keep telling myself, "today, am ONLY decluttering One kitchen cabinet.....not the whole kitchen.. so No big deal"

    • @TheClutterFairy
      @TheClutterFairy  2 года назад +1

      You got it! Sounds like you heard what you needed here!

  • @universaltruth2025
    @universaltruth2025 2 года назад +5

    I struggle to keep up with the basics (cooking, shopping, cleaning) & other demands of life that I often run out of energy to get to the clutter. Every now & then I do manage to get rid of a large amount of items like out-grown toys or clothes if an opportunity comes along like a fundraiser or school gala, but still the clutter has built up almost to the point where it is starting to look like a hoarders house. I haven’t given up though.

  • @sharoncass5671
    @sharoncass5671 Год назад +2

    Hi Gayle and Ed.
    I’ve enjoyed some of your programs I’ve come across thank you for inspiring me to get things out of My closet lately and also getting rid of of. books so before 2022 ended. I had.
    Clothes and shoes out of my closet and sent books I wanted to. Get. Rid of to the Library today 1-3 2023. Also have my oven cleaned out Today after. the holidays and it makes me feel That I’ve accomplished a lot in a short time. Thanks again. And May God Bless

  • @solarhydrowind
    @solarhydrowind Год назад +2

    One thing that I started doing, to remember completed tasks, is to save To Do lists in the same kitchen drawer where I keep receipts ~ to be cleaned out every few months ~ also before and after photos!

  • @gerriwestrick9357
    @gerriwestrick9357 2 года назад +4

    One button! About 4 months ago a button popped off my blouse. It's dark red. To keep from losing it I put one square of toilet paper on my otherwise perfectly cleared off dark brown vanity, and put the button on the square of white toilet paper.
    One sewing needle! Also about 4 months ago I got out my sewing box, did whatever I needed to do and put the sewing box away only to notice the needle I used didn't make it back into the sewing box. To keep from losing it I put it on the magnet that sits next to my knitting chair for holding yarn needles and steel crochet hooks.
    While watching Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda for the third time, it finally occurred to me to get the blouse out of the closet, the button off the toilet paper square and the needle off the magnet. Then I got the sewing box down, found appropriate thread and a thimble and sewed that stupid button on. I returned the sewing box with the needle to its closet shelf and I tossed the square of toilet paper. FIVE MINUTES MAX!
    Question: How long will it take me to get used to not having a square of TP on the vanity or a sewing needle on my magnet?
    Thank you Gayle and Ed! Whether you two know it or not, you nag me in the nicest way.

  • @CM-wh8hn
    @CM-wh8hn 2 года назад +1

    I finally did it! Combining this week's program....."incomplete projects" , with next week's program... computer files.... I just today completed an important task. Completing last week's tittle, I finished organizing years of my medical files.. And anticipating your upcoming program, regarding computers, I finally created a ONE page document of a "medical resume" for me. It has my updated medical data, that I or my family will need in an emergency. Including medical insurance info, emergency contacts, physicians, medications , medical conditions, and past surgeries/ procedures. I just emailed this one page document to my family members, and myself, and my husband. And printed a copy of it to keep in my car. And I can update and email this medical info yearly, easily by editing that one page document file. Thank you, Gayle and Ed so much for giving us that extra push we all need. And for your excellent, experienced, professional advice.

  • @solarhydrowind
    @solarhydrowind 2 года назад +4

    Love last week's tittle: bedroom as refuge! And loved listener's comment that cleared-off table gave whole room calm feeling 🙏🕯️💡🐌💖. Loved what Amelia said about paper backlog... I have same...

  • @lindakurtz2653
    @lindakurtz2653 2 года назад +3

    So helpful! In the aftermath of having lost my house to fire I struggled with how to eat this herd of elephants. I quickly realized that I had to identify what was most critical first and just take a bite. I found it helpful to give myself permission to take breaks recognizing how important it was to get the most important stuff done quickly. I acknowledged I was never going to get it all done in the amount of time I had and did the most important stuff first so I could be ok with letting the rest go. Now, having plowed thru the work of clearing out the house I can see and acknowledge (and pat myself on the back) at the amount of work I DID get done. Not enough time in life to agonize over what I didn't get done. I do not recommend this approach for decluttering!, but I can rest in the calm now and am determined to be intentional about what things need to come back into my space. On a side note about getting stuff to a donation center- I schedule that trip on a monthly basis when I'm heading in the direction of the donation center.

  • @Lenneeful
    @Lenneeful 2 года назад +1

    My house is pretty much where I want it to be... except for my art/craft workshop room. The difficulty is that working from projects to projects, I never know, when my motivation slows down, if I'm really finished with it. The materials I use are then left there for days, weeks, months and even years. I had a bunch of wall paint cans I kept for painting baskets I was making (years ago) and I didn't know if I was going to restart that craft again. So, the solution is to take advantage of little events like my daughter in law asking me if I had white paint. I went to that cupboard and realized that all my paint had gone hard after years of being unused. I am proud to say that yesterday, I took all that paint to my hardware store recycling shed. My thinking is now : "It's easy to go back and pick up more paint, for free I might add, from that shed where there is a ton of them if I ever want to make baskets again". Now I can use that newfound space for the fabric I have for my current project : making puppets.

  • @pattitaylor7300
    @pattitaylor7300 2 года назад +3

    I have a quilt top from high school with signatures of people that I embroidered. I also added little pics that reminded me of them. Some of these people have died. Did not finish the quilt. Trying to decide how to dispose of. Probably going to put a pic in the Facebook group and see if anyone wants it. I now only take on small projects. Dish cloths, hats, but no more afghans, or quilts.

  • @A222Z
    @A222Z 3 месяца назад +1

    Mending .. hmmmm 🤔??? That seems like an ancient kind of task. I used to have an Asian lady do any sewing tasks. She was phenomenal. Sometimes a saftey pin will work on a Missing button, but i do have needle & thread for sm touch-ups which are quite rare.

  • @pnwforesthermit4506
    @pnwforesthermit4506 2 года назад +3

    For me it’s the fear of messing the project up. Part of the perfection issue 😢

  • @A222Z
    @A222Z 3 месяца назад

    Btwn exercise sets, I usually spend the time straightening, but have reached the pt of nothing to straighten, so I am dusting instead. ...😊 Paper stuff is corralled to 2 bags = I have a system in place for dealing w/that as well. So very happy.😁 Then I guess, I will re - go thru containers & see if I can yet again condense. 😊

  • @A222Z
    @A222Z 3 месяца назад +1

    Veterans are nice, bc they come monthly to your home.. however, idk about sm towns.

  • @snow999
    @snow999 2 года назад +4

    I don’t think I’m ever “snappy” haha.

  • @bonnieinthespirit6373
    @bonnieinthespirit6373 Год назад

    12:42 mins! ThAnks I’m glad heard this.

  • @janfromnycsavesmoney8723
    @janfromnycsavesmoney8723 2 года назад +2

    Love this!!

  • @betzy7514
    @betzy7514 2 года назад +1

    Sounds like another title for this episode could have been…”Stuff And Projects, Don’t Let Yourself Get ‘Should’ Upon”

  • @annarussell3751
    @annarussell3751 2 года назад

    Thank you so much for that wonderful wisdom! I keep waiting for that big chunk of time. When I get that, I have still found something else to do or didn’t have the motivation.

  • @Micheleoneandonly
    @Micheleoneandonly 2 года назад +6

    We all know "Half a Job Rob"

  • @bonnieinthespirit6373
    @bonnieinthespirit6373 Год назад

    Books I kept : Bible, fasting book, 4/5 raw fruit n vegetables juice . I kept these.

  • @kathryndalton9867
    @kathryndalton9867 2 года назад +3

    No 1.i haven't a car. No 2.in UK were not met at Charity shop door. We have to take it in. Sometimes they order us to take it home as they've no room. So I now give to random people

  • @acmpmen
    @acmpmen 2 года назад +2

    Unsurrender to the suckness! Thank you!!!

  • @bonnieinthespirit6373
    @bonnieinthespirit6373 Год назад

    Then another pass thru master closet. . I want it cleared out. The STUFF IS MINIMUM BUT I WANT LESS. . I gave my expensive good stuff away .

  • @kathryndalton9867
    @kathryndalton9867 2 года назад

    I keep buying the wrong tools to unfasten cabinet. Someone told me Alan keys but I got a set it's not those. Not pozzies either or screwdrivers

  • @estherharris5307
    @estherharris5307 Год назад +1

    How do you join Zoom or facebook?

    • @TheClutterFairy
      @TheClutterFairy  Год назад

      Every week there is an event post on our website. It includes a link to the upcoming zoom and instructions. Next week’s event post is here:
      www.clutterfairyhouston.com/event/celebrate-get-organized-month-by-restarting-organizing-projects/
      Or you can go to The Clutter Fairy Facebook page any Tuesday at noon US Central time and catch the livestream. We hope you’ll join us live someday soon!

  • @ros8986
    @ros8986 2 года назад +4

    Vital Documents - I would like to encourage people to gather vital documents (birth certificates, ID's, passport, marrige certificate, divorce certificate, social security card (if you are in the US), will, bank account nunbers, credit card numbers, house purchase doc, etc) - put in a waterproof bag with a shoulder strap (or a daypack), so that if you should need in an emergency to leave your home in 5 minutes, you will have them.

    • @CM-wh8hn
      @CM-wh8hn 2 года назад +1

      I love this idea. esp the waterproof idea and backpack idea.

  • @bonnieinthespirit6373
    @bonnieinthespirit6373 Год назад

    Family. Photos. 2.family current address.3. My Jesus notes, dreams. His words to me.4. Birthday cards used/ unused. 5. Misc to file. This the LAST OF THE PAPER(?). Then one more pass. I will toss it to trash.

  • @idaiga4418
    @idaiga4418 Год назад

    Aq