Douglas Murray - Are Deep Thinkers More Lonely?
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- Опубликовано: 19 май 2022
- Douglas Murray explains whether brave thinkers are more lonely. Does Douglas Murray think it's harder to be alone? Is loneliness inevitable if you're a deep thinker? How does Douglas Murray deal with the pain of loneliness?
#douglasmurray #themarch #loneliness
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Many intellectual people find it difficult to be social because being a fun social person requires you to dumb down a lot of things, and not think too logically, and more connect with other people on an emotional level.
Or because they’re not socially competent enough. If someone is intellectual they can find other intellectual people to be around. Claiming most are too stupid to be around is pathetic.
@@cpt1255 Straw manning someone else's position to crap on it is also pretty pathetic, work on yourself first.
@@cpt1255 I'd agree with CPT to some extent though. Is it not a little arrogant to assume others are too stupid in order to feel better about your own social incompetence?
@@cpt1255 No
@@MrChangCJ No - not if they are.. As they usually are, if you are high IQ.. Ask someone who is...
"Whole Libraries Die every day in the heads of people!" So true
The problem is that a lot of people just don't burrow down beneath the surface of complex topics. And if you spend your thinking hours tunneling layer after layer, the individuals around you aren't going to easily grasp what it is you're fascinated (or perturbed) about. It's the issue geeks (any stripe, any topic) have always had. The world doesn't necessarily share your specific fixation on a given thing. So how do you still relate? And how can you maintain relations in return? It can be difficult. Worthwhile! But still difficult.
I love being alone so this is not a problem for me. I’m married with adult children and really enjoy my privacy and quiet time. Most people bring nothing to the table intellectually and I can’t stand mindless drivel conversations.
Feel the same way about conversations. Superficial, non-personal small talk gives me nothing - it just drains me of energy.
@@simons.6029 When the weather and the local sport is debated, "the average person" has nothing more to add - more or less..
I can kind of relate to this. Out of interest, what was the last thing brought to the table intellectually and by whom?
Being alone isn't the same thing as being lonely.
@@Andrew-nn1cz I think, we all know that. That might be why, we ended up having a word for each of them.
Such wisdom to be found from Douglas Murray. An actual light in these dark times.
This video made my day much better just in knowing I’m not alone.
You’re never alone, there is always a lot of people near, just remember it’s the quality of person you want around you that matters!
@@TdfJNR thank you for that. I will pay it forward.
@Nick Kerr thank you for that kindness!
@@austin132140 love that thinking, have a wonderful weekend good sir! I’ll try doing the same.
Not alone, but la onely... I wrote that song long ago...
A quote I wrote along the same lines is,
"The road less traveled is the road more lonely."
Brave thinkers are always unique.
Being alone is not the same thing as feeling lonely.
Truths that remain true are never lost. They might not be seen, but they are still there.
@@odenoki9571 that when isn’t false.
@@odenoki9571 I thought the definition of truth was self evident, although not all truths are self evident. Suffering exists. That’s an absolute truth. Up is up is a relative truth. Your ‘up’ from the opposite side of the world is down. A truth is independent of opinion. What are you trying to clarify?
Do you believe in God?
It is lonely being a deep thinker.
Yes and know. My mind feels more isolated than I physically am. Meaning, that I cannot engage in deep conversations with many people because they're incapable. This is definitely getting noticeably worse over time.
I feel you. I'm cripplingly objective and that seems to be rarer and rarer. I don't have a "team" and almost everyone seems to want you to be on one to discuss anything more than the weather.
I'd rather find myself among the ranks of the lonely then the ranks of the insane
Many extremely intelligent people are insane. This world is ruled by the insane intelligent.
Deep thinking leads to the realization that the meaning of life is love.
@Bouncing bunny 🙏
Tell Anna
Also, I think these past couple years made people realize how alone they really are
True. Removal of the peripheral activity magnified solitude
How attached to their small versions of reality everyone is?
Yes. COVID lockdown did that.
It's better to be lonely and courageous, instead of being in a group and fearful.
The past two years should have highlighted how the hive mindset acts.
Without freedom of speech, you don't have freedom of thought, without freedom of thought, you dont have freedom of spirit/belief.
Maybe, but it sucks anyway...
@@CONEHEADDK Indeed, I'd rather be dumb and happy.
Speech can be curtailed from above because speech is out loud, in public. How can thoughts be policed?
@@godisbollocks You've just made my point valid "curtailed from above". The illusion of authority is paralyzing your mind through fear. Say your truth out loud and you'll gain more spirit.
@@godisbollocksNecro: Thoughts as such cannot be policed but of course, since everyone is learning on the go, suppressing the free flow of information can massively slow down this learning process. It's a bit like companies keeping their production methods secret.
I would say "yes".... Going against the crowd proves that you have to have thick skin to do so, and most likely not many will be going the same way.
I don't get that lonely, but I don't spend much time with other people.
My experience is that most of my closest friendships and acquaintances have been within contexts, that is to say within work, sport or activity. When those activities have been abandoned or relinquished then the ties fade. In retirement I find the greatest happiness when alone but I relish occasional ( but transient ) associations with interesting people.
Chris asks such great questions. They are much deeper than other interviewers and at the same time are not annoying.
You really have a way of getting otherwise sort of sharp, flinty people to open up. Quite the talent. What an interesting conversation.
Great content, thank you.
That was a great observation at the end, everything gets rediscovered and that's the challenge of new generations; rediscovering what previous generations were up to and why.
Chris, been subscribed for a couple of months now, man - great fucking work! These videos are all fucking awesome! I hope you find it in you to keep going with so much great work, brother! Best to you and your loved ones!
There is such beauty in brevity.
The way he describes it as cyclical in my mind is reflective on how we tend to often pass on the wisdoms through every other generation. What I mean is that we often grow up with our parents and then soon realise that adults are not perfect, they are flawed and often we disagree with our parents or then look back on how we were raised and whether we may have done anything differently if we were in their shoes. Additionally, this sometimes knocks down a peg the respect we used to have for our parents but instead transfers that to our grandparents. We feel a deep connection with our grandparents even though sometimes we don't know them as well as everyone else in our lives and as we get older and appreciate morality we try to then preserve the best elements of their generation and pass this wisdom onto the next generation, so in practice we try and pick up on things that our grandparents did right and in essence repeat the cycle again. Once we have children of our own, they will look to their grandparents, which are our parents, and take the best things from their generation, thus completing the eternal repeated cycle 😊
this deserves more views lol super artistic how he ended with 'and that's the march'
Being dim and lonely is rough, being dim but having just enough wit to be aware of how dim you really are is one of life's cruel jokes.
That is one driver of depression in the more self aware and less dim adult person. :|
Douglas is such a king
Lots of excitement in my head.
This is true at the start of your obsessive entrepreneurial journey but you learn pretty quick that life isn't worth it without strong bonds and you re-invest deliberate time into close friends/family/girlfriend. But again yeah the first year or two of fixing your life will be lonely for sure 🤔
Feeling this right now 😥.
That last point resonates a lot with a general theme of Indian scriptures.. cyclical nature of time and life. I am not too deep into it but I think idea of 'avatar' also comes from that. Where people saw shades of someone great that came before in young blood. Mythological stories then might have elevated these ideas like films capture and dramatize zeitgeist now
I have been dealing with thoughts of solipsism lately and I suppose this is more relevant. The march is the only thing.
All the great creative people have been loners.
If we self-educate ourselves in our later years, I have found I have advanced beyond the people I chose to be close to - yes, it is lonely when both of you realize you have outstripped the other one on an intellectual level. It creates an unbridgeable, massive crevasse.
I've tried to pick people that will grow with me. I guess if you didn't know you'd want to learn more when younger then you've only got your past self to blame for not having the foresight 😅. And could always not try and bridge the crevasse, move on
beautiful
A lot of people in the comments thinking they are smart just because they are lonely
The first RUclips upload, the first time you speak in public, the first time you ask a girl out: these are the hardest experiences, but these are the ones which pay the most dividends in the end
I'm pondering this title alone. Still pondering
Not necessarily lonely, but highly selective and particularly reserved.
I resonate with your take.
I am quite content with the space that I provided myself, but it is in the fact that there are few people willing/able to discuss the things that I find interesting that is distressing.
“Normal people” don’t seem to care about anything interesting at all. 🤷♂️
i enjoy my solitude. i'm not lonely, but i have also never had a long term one on one relationship with a partner.
at least we have a cult here 💕
Being the smartest kid in class, is like being the lonely kid in class… He gives it everything hes got and continues to fail and the whole time they tell him it’s his fault
"We're all individuals!" "I'm not."
Yes!
Whole libraries die in the heads of people every day, trying to succeed as a writer after being depressed and suicidal I got a panic that if I die all the work I'll do could be lost.
In all fairness, it is much easier to seek out and get mentors when you went to Eton and Oxford (he earned it mind you!).
For the not so fortunate gifted young people, it's a tougher gig.
Don't say deep thinkers just say people that think too much. If you spend too much time thinking about anything you lose touch and the ability to communicate with a layman. If you talk to anyone with a doctorate in Medicine or engineering you know what i mean. The only people they can identify and communicate with are other Doctors and engineers. There arent many of them so yes they are lonely. What is to much? Anything that negatively impacts your life is to much. Food alcohol sex or thinking.
Right! And intelligence is most definitely a neutral quality as so many “smart” people use their smarts in completely immoral/sociopathic ways. We’ve been taught to worship it when in fact smarts can be a great danger when employed with a poisoned spirit.
Well put,man.
This reminds me of a line in the bible
"Enter the kingdom of God through the narrow gate for the road to destruction is Broad and wide for the many who travel its course. While the road to life is narrow and the way difficult and FEW ever find it"
I'm so lonely, I just want someone to hold me but they piss me off because how stupid they are ...
You are in others as others are in you. Recognition of stupid is the Recognition of a similar state in you, as how else will you recognise stupid.
That makes no sense
Your attitude is another reason why it’s important that intelligence is a 100 NEUTRAL quality. The world is ran by the insane, immoral “intelligent”. Many intelligent are deeply unwise and sociopathic. The intelligence of humans can be used to justify suppressed empathy/sociopathy toward others “below” them.
@@zoomby4380 a sphincter says what?
@@zoomby4380 The idea that judging negative traits in others is a reflection of what resides within you just isn’t true.
Aren't all creatives. Solitude by Anthony Storr is a must read.
I'm deep thinker but I have courage to interact people sorround me I knew it's so hard always feel lonely.
I think i like being alone.
Solitude is good loneliness isn’t
Me: I’m lonely, does that mean I’m a deep thinker?
Reading the comments makes me think many people think that🤣🤣
I don't have any deep insights. Just found myself to be the first commenter!
Huge fan though
But in doing so you are a genius Sanj.
The first step towards wisdom is understanding that you know nothing.
@@tcorourke2007 I had that thought in college 40 years ago. I went to a 2 year tech school for engineering and aced everything. Went on to a University and was extremely humbled by the much higher level of mathematics (simple calculus vs Newtonian) I needed to relearn. That moment in time made me realize how little I knew.
truth
More complexity = more uniqueness = alone
Check out the book The Code to the Matrix by Sevan Bomar. You should do a podcast with Sevan too he's got a ton of info .
ever decreasing circles.
Chris is smart tax for the complexity of mind is loneliness
I would love to know how this translate in big 5 personality scale. For example I'm pretty sure Douglas Murray scores high on conscientiousness
@@Welsh_Veteran_420_Z don't know how to respond but I've watched the lectures on personality and from what I have understood is the Meyers-Briggs scientifically not valid. I also did a MBTI test and the results where a bit interesting. But if it comes to accuracy I'm pretty certain big 5 is more reliable
I've gone through this a lot, especially over the last 5 or 6 years. Most people simply don't know much about anything that doesn't directly involve them.......nor do they have any interest. I'd rather listen to a podcast 9 times outta 10 than talk w/your average normie.
"If you're so smart, why aren't you happy?" Naval Ravikant
Totally dependent on the person sense of belief.
Love it when Douglas speaks of hope and positivity. As a great a writer as he is, the topics he writes about often evoke feelings of anger and negativity.
What constitutes deep thinking though?
Caring about things a that matter; not pop-culture mainstream bullshit.
The saint must walk alone.
I am totally with Mr Murray on this, it is incredibly sad when we lose someone like eg. the great BB King but the many thousands and thousands who were influenced by him will continue and perhaps in time will develop their own original licks to give the world and on it goes.
Deep thinkers aren't always deep logical thinkers. Some are deep emotional thinkers. Both types of people are probably more lonely but loneliness is also a choice. It isn't something to feel victimized by. Are you taking advantage of the social opportunities around you?
He talks so slow. Watching it on 1.75x speed and its still slow
I don't understand anything in this conversation. I would be happy to review the book though if the author would like me to do that. At any rate to send me a hardcopy of the book please ask RUclips for my email address.
High IQ people are more lonely cos people who are less intelligent make you feel so lonely.
They can be nice, can be easy to get on with. But there is a lacking of gain from those people.
You are everything and no thing , alone but not alone , real but an illusion , you are the cosmos and a paradox . Lol
Vitai lampada tradunt ... they hand on the torch of life, is a quotation from De Rerum Natura a poem by the Roman philosopher Lucretius.
Define high IQ - there are very few. They can choose to be alone, or amongst "imbicils" - like asking Messi to train alone or with pre school kids..
What a waffler!! He didn't answer the question and is just stating the obvious (we discard in order to discover, even if it has already been found!) - which, after finishing his muttering for 4 minutes, ends with a little smug smile as if he said something profound 🤣
Opposite conclusion: Deep thinkers arent more lonely because theres no such thing as "emotional intelligence", there is just "intelligence". People with higher levels of intelligence (who are capable of thinking more deeply than average), will therefore have the ability to have higher quality social skills. Better quality social skills allow for more social connections. Loneliness is a negative emotion dimension, so its not something people choose voluntarily, because negative emotion is generally to be avoided. So therefore people who are able to think more deeply will on average have a stronger ability to avoid loneliness, because their stronger cognitive abilities will benefit them in the social realm, and help them have more friends and avoid loneliness as a result.
Your IQ has nothing to do with your ability to be sociable, or not. I think the issue arises from lack of understanding, or interest, in what less intelligent people concern themselves with.
Being intelligent keeps people from making friends because “normal” people are concerned with things that are mundane.
Studies have been done that show that if a person’s IQ is two standard deviations higher than the person that they are interacting with that conversation and understanding becomes more difficult. Also, high intelligence is less common so it is more difficult to find those that you can relate to and engage with on a similar level.
Have you tried having conversations with stupid people? It almost induces violence.
Genius is a lonely place…. Take it from me 🙂
This comment is genius! 😂
42…. Dude you look 52 …
No, he really doesn’t.
Jesus, you black men are so obviously bigoted. It is a miracle that you cannot discover why you are hated.
You mean, MAN are lonely
The comments are more enlightening than this boring video.
Ikrrrrrrrr
OUR UNENDING CIRULAR REASONING IS WHAT MAKES THE WORLD AWFUL OVER AND OVER AGAIN !! AROUND AND AROUND IT GOES AND I AM NOT HAPPY WITH THIS VIEW OF LIFE IT IS SO LIMITING!
GRAMMER ERROR: IT IS LONELIER NOT MORE LONELY , VERB CONJUNCTION IS IMPORTANT!