Cinematic Excrement: Episode 54 - After Earth

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  • Опубликовано: 17 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 672

  • @SwiftNimblefoot
    @SwiftNimblefoot 9 лет назад +197

    As a zoologist, I also wanna point out how stupid a pack of animals would be to attack a giant predator's nest who is much larger then them, and even continue the assault after multiple of their pack are killed - and then just leave the baby birds behind without eating them. No animal is that stupid.

    • @dragonmaster613
      @dragonmaster613 5 лет назад +13

      @Marco Polo what the FUCK is wrong with you?
      You must be a Fucktard!

    • @afrog2666
      @afrog2666 4 года назад +1

      If you`re a zoologist you also know that many animals are dum AF, lol

    • @afrog2666
      @afrog2666 4 года назад +1

      @Marco Polo You need to sort out those mommy issues dude.

    • @RD-lt3ht
      @RD-lt3ht 4 года назад +1

      Why are imbeciles attacking your comment...Sheesh!

    • @Safarichromosomeslol
      @Safarichromosomeslol 4 года назад +7

      @@afrog2666 Still more intelligent than some people, LMAO

  • @breadordecide
    @breadordecide 9 лет назад +182

    Fun fact: the movie was once a simple camping story. Father gets hurt and son goes for help. The son faces his fears against a BEAR. This is probably why they used the name URSA when they ruined the entire premise and turned it into this science fiction nonsense.

    • @alfrankensteinfeldman
      @alfrankensteinfeldman 9 лет назад

      breadordecide Proof or GTFO.

    • @alfrankensteinfeldman
      @alfrankensteinfeldman 9 лет назад +21

      breadordecide Wow. Why didn't they use that concept?

    • @breadordecide
      @breadordecide 9 лет назад +53

      It's a solid idea. They unfortunately ruined it by making it more than it needed to be. An honest down to earth father son story would have sufficed.

    • @alfrankensteinfeldman
      @alfrankensteinfeldman 9 лет назад +7

      breadordecide Agreed.

    • @thoughtsofaleo2916
      @thoughtsofaleo2916 9 лет назад +2

      +breadordecide That's cool that they tried to do polyglot accents and change it according to status. That makes sense, with how lower class might be less educated and use less-refined versions of the accent vs. more upper-class people. Do you see a lower class person in this movie, though, to show the difference? I understand that people didn't understand what accents were being used while watching the movie, and it probably didn't help that Jaden apparently couldn't hold on to the accent for very long in the film (from what I've been told.)

  • @_--_--_--_--__
    @_--_--_--_--__ 4 года назад +48

    I always though Will Smith just needs to let his kids find their own way

  • @GideonGleeful95
    @GideonGleeful95 10 лет назад +69

    5:02. You'd think that, but I'd like to point you to a line from The Last Airbender:
    "My brother and the princess became friends right away."
    You do not "tell" that much in books, a medium that lends itself much more to telling. Think about it. Imagine if you were reading The last Airbender, the novel, and it was written from the first person perspective of Katara. at one point she writes the following:
    "As we stood before the council I caught a glimpse of Sokka starring at Yue. After the council was disbanded, my brother and the princess became friends right away, while me and Aang went with master Pakku to begin our training."
    Compared to:
    "As we stood before the council I caught a glimpse of Sokka starring at Yue. After the council was disbanded, my brother turned to me and said "Hey, I'm going to go talk with the princess." before rushing after her. I saw her smile as he introduced himself, and they began chatting as they walked together. I turned around and me and Aang went with master Pakku to begin our training."
    By the description of the actions that Sokka and Yue have done, I established that they were becoming friends very quickly. I will admit, I'm not the best writer in the world, but even i understand that the best way to establish character and relationships is by telling the audience what they do, not who they are. And Shyamalan is getting paid to do this crap.

    • @WobblesandBean
      @WobblesandBean 10 лет назад +3

      Yeah, that really pissed me off...the movie COULD have been amazing, if he'd scrapped all that stupid narration and cut out, like, half of the scenes. All he had to do was highlight the key points of the first season: Finding Aang, discovering the air nomad genocide, and then defending the water temple.
      None of that earth bender shit, no blue spirit, they could probably have cut the love story between Sokka and Yue, as well. You have a powerful scene of the gang flying away on Appa (who was also mishandled int he film) after leaving the air temple, there's a sense of quiet despair and melancholy...aaaaand then Katara's voice chimes in and destroys any pathos the movie had built up.
      Fuck this movie. And fuck Shyamalan.

    • @GideonGleeful95
      @GideonGleeful95 10 лет назад +2

      Amelia Bee Well, you see, if they miss out the "earth bender shit" then quite a lot of important details get missed out for any sequels they had planned. That said, they missed out tonnes of them anyway. Like REALLY IMPORTANT ONES. Like THAT CHARACTER BECOMES ONE OF THE MAIN CHARACTERS SO YOU HAVE ALREADY BROKEN FILM THREE YOU MORON! level of bad.

    • @MetFanMac
      @MetFanMac 10 лет назад +5

      Amelia Bee As the Nostalgia Critic pointed out, the movie's worst sin was scrapping any all attempts to make us empathize with the characters in favor of exposition up the wazoo.

    • @kazinadbiralamadit6905
      @kazinadbiralamadit6905 4 года назад +1

      @@gamestation2690 the cartoon show relied upon show don't tell while the movie relied upon tell don't show.

    • @MinscFromBaldursGate92
      @MinscFromBaldursGate92 3 года назад +1

      Shyamalan nerfed the earth benders so bad.

  • @michaeljespersen3323
    @michaeljespersen3323 10 лет назад +93

    Funny how a big flaw in After Earth is how there are absolutely no signs of civilization, and a big flaw in Battlefield Earth is that there's too much and its completely unaffected by the 1000 years that passed

    • @jspaingreene6350
      @jspaingreene6350 4 года назад +15

      Another coincidence is that they're both scientologist related. ick.

    • @wolfieinu
      @wolfieinu 4 года назад

      @@jspaingreene6350 Wait, what's the Scientology connection with After Earth?

    • @unthawedwater747
      @unthawedwater747 4 года назад +3

      @@wolfieinu the Smith's are in the church, so indirectly related

    • @wolfieinu
      @wolfieinu 4 года назад +1

      @@unthawedwater747 Oh, fair enough. I thought maybe the storyline had something to do with their doctrine somehow.

  • @MTtheBiased
    @MTtheBiased 9 лет назад +12

    As a person who has seen several documentaries on Scientology, the obvious themes present within this movie pretty much make this more of an advertisement for Scientology promo to me than anything else. Especially considering the fact that one of the core principles in Scientology is that fear and all other emotions are caused by a ''reactive mind'' that one can ultimately get rid of or suppress. Anyone else notice this ?.

  • @TheAtheistGamer
    @TheAtheistGamer 10 лет назад +191

    Now that should be a internet meme. DENIED SIT DOWN! come on. who is with me?

    • @warrirornunluv801
      @warrirornunluv801 10 лет назад +31

      DENIED! SIT DOWN

    • @TheAtheistGamer
      @TheAtheistGamer 10 лет назад +7

      Alexis Hernandez
      Oh okay...

    • @warrirornunluv801
      @warrirornunluv801 10 лет назад +4

      TheAtheistGamer I'm sorry, it's my failed attempt at a joke. But seriously, you're right...that quote MUST be a meme!

    • @TheAtheistGamer
      @TheAtheistGamer 10 лет назад

      Alexis Hernandez
      yes! i am making a video on this so i can make into a internet meme! everyone will love it!

    • @warrirornunluv801
      @warrirornunluv801 10 лет назад +2

      TheAtheistGamer Godspeed to you, sir! -salute-

  • @bradwolf07
    @bradwolf07 9 лет назад +160

    When Jayden's character says he wants to work with his mom...I like to imagine that is was actually Jayden telling Will that. That makes me smile thinking that

    • @ahmataevo
      @ahmataevo 4 года назад +9

      I'd like to think the mom in question was Will's stripper girlfriend in the 1996 Independence Day

    • @mihaitha
      @mihaitha 4 года назад +1

      @@ahmataevo nah, she didn't age well.

    • @sanyonazyin6063
      @sanyonazyin6063 3 года назад +2

      Kitai: Dad I want to work with mom (because I hate you)

    • @MinscFromBaldursGate92
      @MinscFromBaldursGate92 3 года назад +7

      DENIED! Sit down!

    • @peterlane1391
      @peterlane1391 3 года назад +6

      My guess is Katai is doing a lot of internalizing here. He feels guilt for not being able to help his sister, and he interprets his father being emotionally distant as him blaming Kitai and thinking he was cowardly. His father doesn't have to do something to give him that idea. People internalize ideas that are completely in their head all the time. The problem is you needed better writing to develop this idea. We should have spent more time with Katai before the big mission.

  • @RileyWhiddenIsArguablyInsane
    @RileyWhiddenIsArguablyInsane 9 лет назад +94

    Google's Auto-translation called Cipher "Diaper."
    Life is complete.

    • @floydlooney6837
      @floydlooney6837 6 лет назад +8

      Riley Whidden Diaper Rage, a good name for a rock band

  • @TheAdarkerglow
    @TheAdarkerglow 4 года назад +26

    "The toast landed... jellyside down!" -- Yeah, Devil was a real step up alright.
    It should also be noted that they don't simply track humans by smelling their fear. They smell their fear AND NOTHING ELSE.

    • @DeathIsAroundUs
      @DeathIsAroundUs Год назад +1

      Stupid line I agree it’s typical Shyamalan dialogue but the movie was still good could have been better but good

  • @cloudstrife532220
    @cloudstrife532220 10 лет назад +97

    The twist is there is no twist.

    • @SuperTonyony
      @SuperTonyony 9 лет назад +23

      What a twist!

    • @LinkMarioSamus
      @LinkMarioSamus 5 лет назад +4

      At the time, I don't think Shyamalan had had a twist in any of his films since The Village. Since then Split had one, but that twist didn't affect the movie's own plot.

    • @zayntomlinson7758
      @zayntomlinson7758 4 года назад

      @@LinkMarioSamus only because he wrote Split back when he wrote Sixth Sense, otherwise the twist would've been dumb

  • @davesmith2480
    @davesmith2480 8 лет назад +43

    Fear is a stimulus that gives a burst of adrenaline for the 'flight-or-fight' response. It gives an advantage in dangerous situations.

    • @Jeffrey314159
      @Jeffrey314159 7 лет назад +2

      dave smith The gift of fear is life itself! There is nothing to fear, but the 'fearmongers' themselves - - I said that

    • @jamescrow4915
      @jamescrow4915 4 года назад +1

      Not really people who give into that have never been in a situation requiring clear and present thoughts. Putting fear and apprehension out of your mind are important in a crisis

  • @ph89787
    @ph89787 9 лет назад +19

    3:56 can Shyamalan say Marty Stu?
    "Everything on this planet is designed to kill humans." Clearly Shyamalamadingdong hasn't been to Australia. Also is Jaden starting to turn more and more into Hayden Christensen?

  • @tyrantgregcagkaiju71
    @tyrantgregcagkaiju71 9 лет назад +40

    Even in Battlefield Earth, the characters stumbled upon the remains of the human civilization built long before the movie's setting. And that never happens at all in THIS movie?!

    • @MrAlcazar
      @MrAlcazar 8 лет назад +1

      The genius of Shayamalan!

    • @munromister777
      @munromister777 8 лет назад +4

      Without humanity maintaining the structures, a lot of it would collapse within 1000 years. There would still be some structures still standing (hell, some will be up for a very long time), but most need constant human tinkering. Mind you, a lot of this comes from the show Life After People, but it's a good show. lifeafterpeople.wikia.com/wiki/Timeline_of_collapses

    • @schwarzerritter5724
      @schwarzerritter5724 8 лет назад +2

      Artificial structures crumble much faster if the planet freezes over every night.

    • @floydlooney6837
      @floydlooney6837 6 лет назад

      Tyrant Gregcag so far in the future there'd be nothing left

    • @the_regular_dinosaurus_rex
      @the_regular_dinosaurus_rex 4 года назад +2

      some iconic landmarks, especially really old ones might still stand. like the colloseum or the pyramids

  • @cloudysky581
    @cloudysky581 9 лет назад +16

    After 'DENIED SIT DOWN' we both smirked at the EXACT same time.

  • @schwarzerritter5724
    @schwarzerritter5724 9 лет назад +54

    Mrs. Rage, can Cipher come out to play?

  • @HoopsAndDinoMan
    @HoopsAndDinoMan 10 лет назад +32

    I request a Cinematic Excrement review of Noah

  • @moonman375
    @moonman375 9 лет назад +84

    I like this better than the nostalgia critic version.

    • @clearspira
      @clearspira 9 лет назад +29

      I like most things than the nostalgia critic version. He is overrated.

    • @patrickshields5251
      @patrickshields5251 9 лет назад +3

      ***** so is confused matthew and he actually liked this piece of shit

    • @patrickshields5251
      @patrickshields5251 9 лет назад +3

      ***** oh you subcribed to him, never mind

    • @roberttreacy8271
      @roberttreacy8271 5 лет назад +7

      Agreed. NC is overrated.

    • @yesman9792
      @yesman9792 4 года назад +4

      NC is some grade A cringe bois

  • @JesseWolfboy
    @JesseWolfboy 10 лет назад +32

    "What in God's holy name are you blathering about?!" LMAO, that was a great cut!

    • @JesseWolfboy
      @JesseWolfboy 9 лет назад +3

      Lol, yeah would also have been a great cut! That's the fun thing about these RUclips reviews. These guys can take clips from anywhere, cut them together with voice-over and create something really funny in a way that no other medium does...

  • @beeman2075
    @beeman2075 7 лет назад +9

    Reflecting another commenter, Jayden's acting was pretty alright in The Karate Kid remake. He has a lot more to learn as an actor, but under the right direction, he's not that bad. That film also had some very good acting from Jackie Chan, particularly when Jackie's character is emotionally upset in the 'student teaches the master' scene.

  • @alfrankensteinfeldman
    @alfrankensteinfeldman 9 лет назад +64

    "I like it but I think it's something bad". Huh, that's what my wife said. :)

    • @aamiller90
      @aamiller90 6 лет назад +2

      William Glover haha such a stupid line

    • @MrDirtclodfight
      @MrDirtclodfight 4 года назад +2

      Yeah, but your wife says that to a lot of people.

    • @sebastianemond5313
      @sebastianemond5313 2 года назад

      12:57 - 13:01 🤨... Who the f- cares if you like it kid?

  • @dynamitenetworkinggroup8435
    @dynamitenetworkinggroup8435 3 года назад +11

    i haven't laughed this hard in a long while. You're a genius sir! the accent comment and how the ursula hunts are howlarious details. This is the future, right? So surely they have the technology to create a HazMat suit that already exists today - has existed for atleast a decade if not more...

  • @CAMarino92
    @CAMarino92 10 лет назад +74

    This movie was destined to be a failure: Will Smith is a great actor, and while I not agree on your views of Jaden being a decent actor (I consider him a very mediocre actor) I agree that he can hone his craft with time. But that's not an excuse on this movie sucking: Will is SO vain and desperate on trying to push his son to become a star who forgot how make a quality film. But the movie just sank when Will hired Shamblezan as a director to suck any energy or potential left.
    I can say this movie might be worst than The Last Airbender: There, I said it, and I'm not taking it back. I grew to hate this movie at the rate it became one of the worst movies I've ever seen. While the Last Airbender was made out of laziness and not understanding the source material, After Earth was the product of pride of Will Smith and his whole family.
    Many people will disagree with me, but everyone we can agree this movie sucked bear balls.

    • @brabhamF1
      @brabhamF1 5 лет назад +9

      YMS said it pretty accurately. Jayden runs around acting all cool and emotionless while Will's greatest part of acting are very emotional roles. They basically play a role designed for the other.

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 5 лет назад +3

      I don't know... Jaden at least can emote, a thing that a lot of mediocre actors can't even get right. I know I sound too indulgent but with Shyamalan at the helm I can't bring myself to put the blame completely on Jaden.

    • @dliston1
      @dliston1 4 года назад +1

      except he is not a great actor. He just plays himself

    • @Flaris
      @Flaris 3 года назад +1

      I can agree that this movie sucked. Worst than the Last Airbender? Yeah, I can't go there. I think butchering source material that completely takes it to another level compared to this movie. But they are both god awful experiences.
      This movie was just doomed. The vanity project side of it was setting it up to fail. But then Will Smith who is an actor locked in with charisma decided to team up with a director that sucks all charisma out of his actors and makes them give the flattest performances possible. Yeah...no shock this failed .

  • @robbylebotha
    @robbylebotha 4 года назад +13

    This is a story all about how,
    My ship got torn and turned upside down,
    So if you got a minute just sit right there,
    And I'll tell you how we made the worst film of the year...

  • @frankm.2850
    @frankm.2850 Год назад +2

    A father/son camping trip gone wrong might have actually been a decent movie.

  • @MelBrooksFan78
    @MelBrooksFan78 10 лет назад +43

    Smeghead, since you reviewed two of Shymalan's worst films, do you think you could tackle "The Happening?"

  • @SwiftNimblefoot
    @SwiftNimblefoot 9 лет назад +8

    Cypher Rage, the little known brother of Johnny Quest villain Ezekiel Rage, was always unnoticed, hence the nickname Cypher. :D

    • @victorhernandez8723
      @victorhernandez8723 5 лет назад +2

      I didn’t think anyone remembered the Real Adventures of Johnny Quest!

    • @shadowleon659
      @shadowleon659 Год назад +1

      ​@@victorhernandez8723 A great cartoon reboot that's sadly forgotten.

  • @HoboJoe83
    @HoboJoe83 10 лет назад +23

    Cypher Raige:One of the missing member of Youngblood.

  • @KjvakWolf
    @KjvakWolf 9 лет назад +10

    that tidbit with tyrion was frigging hilarious

  • @brucebaker810
    @brucebaker810 4 года назад +6

    Admiral Raige, Space Ranger Corp. About to retire.
    "I'm getting too old for this ship."

  • @georgeandrews1394
    @georgeandrews1394 9 лет назад +13

    I just realized something... if these guys have remote probes for observation, why don't they have remote probes that can pick up things or operate simple machines? I guess what seems to be a light military ship wouldn't really need a probe like that for much other than basic repairs, and I could understand that Cypher and Katai probably wouldn't be able to jerry-rig one to fly out 100 km and continue to maintain contact with the ship. Still, it seems like something that would be a useful emergency tool.

    • @hemmingwayfan
      @hemmingwayfan 9 лет назад +9

      +George Andrews You're not familiar with the works of M. Night Shamalayn are you?

  • @roberttreacy8271
    @roberttreacy8271 7 лет назад +8

    "Show, don't tell". Didn't you remember anything from The Last Airbender?

  • @princessolmeca2933
    @princessolmeca2933 7 лет назад +4

    There will never be a Will/Jayden movie better than 'The Pursuit of Happiness.'

  • @serenitymoon825
    @serenitymoon825 10 лет назад +12

    You are literally the only person I have heard call Jaden Smith a good actor.

  • @scaunethec7747
    @scaunethec7747 8 лет назад +9

    "That's what you get when you use AT&T" -- I wholeheartedly agree with that.

  • @stagelinedpro
    @stagelinedpro 10 лет назад +5

    Much better then The Nostalgia Critic's review.

  • @LeafingThroughTheFrames
    @LeafingThroughTheFrames 10 лет назад +12

    Hilarious episode. I loved all the jokes. So glad I never saw this movie. Your review will suffice. Keep up the work, can't wait for the next one!:D

  • @LaineMann
    @LaineMann 8 лет назад +30

    I got this confused with Battlefield Earth. Is that a bad sign?

  • @MariahSyn
    @MariahSyn 10 лет назад +12

    The ship was "deathproof" but you needed to be in the kid's seat and strapped in for it to take effect. =P

    • @ahmataevo
      @ahmataevo 4 года назад

      So the lesson of this movie is, immortality strap-ons are good for you?

    • @MariahSyn
      @MariahSyn 4 года назад

      @@ahmataevo Wow, how far down did you have to go to find that comment? I mean, that's either really worrying or really dedicated. :|

    • @ahmataevo
      @ahmataevo 4 года назад +3

      @@MariahSyn - Sometimes the comments are more entertaining than the video itself

    • @MariahSyn
      @MariahSyn 4 года назад

      @@ahmataevo touche. I don't even remember what my comment was about, lol

  • @roberttreacy8271
    @roberttreacy8271 5 лет назад +4

    Alien monsters that smell our fear? Sounds like a game of Mad Libs.

  • @BeatchBall
    @BeatchBall 10 лет назад +6

    I saw the trailer for this movie, and decided not to even bother with it. I'm glad to see that my decision was justified.
    You do good work, Sean. I've been a close follower of you since Eragon; which is still one of my favourite reviews. As RUclips reviews go, you're probably my favourite next to Doug Walker (a.k.a. Nostalgia Critic). Keep it up.
    A sequel? Oh please say it's The Sea of Monsters! Please! I have never thrown my 3D glasses at a screen before, but that film brought me damn close.

  • @joejitsu034
    @joejitsu034 4 года назад +2

    Damn. I found this channel 5 years late. Story of my life 😭

  • @marklarizzle
    @marklarizzle 4 года назад +1

    I feel so bad for people who think Hollywood losers are the only ones who make pretty moving pictures on the magic picture box.

  • @WobblesandBean
    @WobblesandBean 10 лет назад +15

    I never knew about the first draft. That actually sounds like the basis for a good story! So...why the whole scifi thing? And it just occurred to me: Earth is still perfectly viable. Life is flourishing. The atmosphere is less breathable, but they clearly have means to overcome that!
    So WHY are they bothering with fighting hostile aliens who clearly have superior technology when they can just go back home? I think giant birds and monkeys are a little less threatening than genetically engineered monsters, guys!

  • @TheQfe
    @TheQfe 10 лет назад +8

    I love you and i love your videos :3

  • @SMAXZO
    @SMAXZO 9 лет назад +46

    No...Cypher Rage sounded like a bad 90's comic book character.

  • @shelbyoconor1430
    @shelbyoconor1430 9 лет назад +9

    I remember my reaction to this movies first trailer. " oh this doesn't look to bad" then directed by Shamilon appeared on screen, " oooooohhhh this is going to suck!" yeah after what he did to the last airbender I have no fate in the man. I mean my mom (who has never seen the original show) hated the movie, and she thinks twilight is as good as Harry Potter!!

  • @quiettimegaming3642
    @quiettimegaming3642 3 года назад +3

    12:58 lol... now I see why he didn’t get “promoted to the rank of ranger (sir)”...
    What kind of ranger wouldn’t know the functions of their gear and the meaning/purpose of something as significant as the entire color of the suit changing?
    He’s said to be an excellent student in the classroom... I would imagine he would know about every weapon, gadget, and gear.
    Imagine someone looking to get into the marines saying they didn’t know the purpose of their gear.
    So this just confirms Katai is slow, and the only reason he’s made it as far as he has is nepotism

  • @TrueMetis
    @TrueMetis 9 лет назад +4

    You know there should have been a twist at the end. That the other distress beacon was broken too.
    Or alternatively the Ursa hit him so hard him beating the Ursa and getting off of earth was just a delusion caused by his brain injury. Yeah think I'ma go with that.

  • @biggeek2256
    @biggeek2256 5 лет назад +2

    So in short: Ursa’s are pretty much the poor man’s version of the Grimm from RWBY but instead of being attracted to negative emotions, they are attracted by fear. I believe I gave a decent summary for the Ursa’s in this movie

  • @billa107
    @billa107 10 лет назад +6

    It's got to be Grown-Ups 2. Gotta get the mandatory Sandler film outta the way! lol

  • @Super165i
    @Super165i 8 лет назад +29

    This movie was also accused of promoting The Church of Scientology.

    • @3Guys1Video
      @3Guys1Video 7 лет назад +2

      John Travolta?

    • @JohnSmith-eo5sp
      @JohnSmith-eo5sp 6 лет назад +5

      No, that whole "place yourself in the moment" line of dialog that Cypher Raige delivers to Kitai . That is a Scientology credo

    • @wedgeantilles4712
      @wedgeantilles4712 5 лет назад +3

      Well, battlefield earth was without a doubt plastered with scientology beliefs from start to finish and so is this, in a way.

    • @ahmataevo
      @ahmataevo 4 года назад +3

      @@wedgeantilles4712 - Fun fact - Battlefield Earth was authored by Ron Hubbard himself

    • @wedgeantilles4712
      @wedgeantilles4712 4 года назад +2

      ahmataevo: That wouldn't surprise me at all.
      It's a shitty movie about their delusional conspiracy shit.

  • @roberttreacy8271
    @roberttreacy8271 8 лет назад +4

    Fun fact: Will Smith considers this as his worst movie.

  • @emmaduncan2991
    @emmaduncan2991 7 лет назад +3

    I wonder if Trey Smith, wonders why dad isn't handing him a movie franchise?

  • @GideonGleeful95
    @GideonGleeful95 10 лет назад +6

    Suggestion for next review having seen the Nostalgia Critic's review: Food Fight.

  • @noeldomingo125
    @noeldomingo125 8 лет назад +11

    Jaden Smith has only one expression throughout the film

    • @floydlooney6837
      @floydlooney6837 6 лет назад +2

      Noel Domingo he can really furl those brows, man!

    • @gamleskalle1
      @gamleskalle1 4 года назад +2

      Still one more than Seagal.

  • @24KGoldbackGorilla
    @24KGoldbackGorilla 3 года назад +1

    Cypher reminds me of my father, a master at 'ghosting', well I've only seen him do it once.

  • @ConnorNotyerbidness
    @ConnorNotyerbidness 2 года назад +4

    It is a crime that nobody has put Denied Sit Down over will smith slapping chris rock

  • @kristinfrostlazerbeams
    @kristinfrostlazerbeams 4 года назад +1

    I've figured out the accents!!! They are from Cartmanese, like in South Park Cartman. It dawned on me when the kid was yelling about "What did you want me to do" blah blah. All I could think was "sweet," said how Cartman says it. Respect may authoritah!

  • @Mosesree
    @Mosesree 4 года назад +8

    2014: "I for one welcome the coming apocalypse"
    2020: Yeah, might wanna reassess, mate

  • @cyanmanta
    @cyanmanta 8 месяцев назад +2

    Knowing that the screenplay was cowritten by Will Smith makes it even worse. Imagine you're a teenage boy, your dad just wrote a story about how awesome he is, and your character arc in it is that you become just like him. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, not even Jaden.
    Also, Shyamalan really shows his incompetence as a director when he works with kids. He has no idea how to get good performances out of them. Haley Joel Osment was a fluke, likely helped out on set by Toni Collette and Bruce Willis. Every other child performance I've seen in his filmography has been bad.

    • @moopig50000
      @moopig50000 5 месяцев назад

      Isn't there a part of the movie when Jaden says "I'm better than everyone, even you!" I like to think this whole thing is a punishment for Jaden claiming to be a better actor or something

  • @Guhonter
    @Guhonter 4 года назад

    Here we are 6 years later and this finally got recommended to me, thanks YT!

  • @georgesalisbury5996
    @georgesalisbury5996 10 лет назад +6

    Let me guess: Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters!

  • @roberttreacy8271
    @roberttreacy8271 7 лет назад +6

    Kitai makes Bella Swann look intelligent.

  • @gmanz8487
    @gmanz8487 4 года назад +3

    Is it me or do I have a feeling Smeghead is much more convenient than Nostalgia Critic??

  • @TheCoffeeNut711
    @TheCoffeeNut711 10 лет назад +4

    That blade weapon is fucking stupid. Its the future and the best they can come up with is a close combat darth maul blade?

  • @moviemaker1986
    @moviemaker1986 9 лет назад +4

    Clementine!
    Now I want to see Smeghead review the game.

  • @rushnerd
    @rushnerd 10 лет назад +8

    oh GOD that explains the dog scene in Walking Dead :(

    • @WobblesandBean
      @WobblesandBean 10 лет назад +4

      Yeah...that's just messed up. And the sign of a HORRIBLE WRITER.

    • @ShintaroKisaragiPastorCola
      @ShintaroKisaragiPastorCola 10 лет назад +2

      Yeah, but he definitely pulled an emotional trigger on the people playing the game. Albeit sadistic, it's good if someone's able to toy with your emotions through small events in the somewhat near beginning. It brings you right back into the feel of The Walking Dead.

    • @WobblesandBean
      @WobblesandBean 10 лет назад +3

      Shintaro Kisaragi
      See, that's where I disagree. Building pathos through your characters or in a way that makes sense to the overall story = good. Doing so in a cheap manner with no context or buildup, like randomly throwing in a dead/dying animal = bad.
      Basically, the only way this guy knows HOW to tug at our heartstrings is to simply add a cute widdle animal out of nowhere and then have it die. It's cheap, it's lazy, and it's just plain disgusting.

    • @rushnerd
      @rushnerd 10 лет назад +1

      Amelia Bee
      I didn't think it was bad or cheap (mostly because the whole game series pulls this shit constantly) It was just another choice to be made and poor Clem had to defend herself like always. At least you have the option to humanely let the dog die.

    • @ShintaroKisaragiPastorCola
      @ShintaroKisaragiPastorCola 10 лет назад

      Amelia Bee Ah, well, I can't disagree there. I never thought about it that way.

  • @bradwolf07
    @bradwolf07 9 лет назад +9

    I'm not one to give M. Night a pass (ESPECIALLY for the travesty he called the Last Airbender), but for this movie I'm willing to overlook his "contributions". In fact, when I saw this, I had no idea M. Night was even involved until after when I looked it up on IMDB. I see this trainwreck as the Smiths fault. First they tried to get the daughter a singing career (Whip my hair back and forth should be considered a war crime) and then they tried to make the son into an action star. UTTER FAIL. And Will Smith is such a charismatic actor, but you wouldn't believe it by watching this movie. They tried to make Jayden look good and only succeeded in making him look like a whiny little piss-ant and Will look like talking cardboard.

    • @sulffffffur
      @sulffffffur 9 лет назад

      The thing about The Last Airbender is that the failure of the film wasn't Shyamalan's fault either.

    • @MetallicaRules
      @MetallicaRules 7 лет назад +1

      +Jovonthony Pridetano Yes it was.

    • @sulffffffur
      @sulffffffur 7 лет назад

      +MetallicaRules Sir... I'm gonna need you to do a little research.
      Shyamalan's first draft was said to be good, only to get fucked up with rewrites. Sure, it didn't help that he hyped it up, but still.

    • @MetallicaRules
      @MetallicaRules 7 лет назад

      And he was the one who rewrote it, was he not? So even then, it's still his fault. And also, the first draft of his script referenced all 20 episodes and would have been several hours long, doesn't seem like much of an adaptation if you try to do that. I would just watch the show if that was the case. If you're going to do an adaptation, you need to know right from the beginning what parts to include, what parts to scrap, and what to change in order to fit the change from show to film. Shyamalan did not prepare properly for this role, and thus, he screwed up. I once wrote a 15 page research paper for school, but the assignment required it be 8-10 pages, so, because I did not plan appropriately, I had to cut several parts out in order to meet the criteria. And guess what, my essay suffered, and the grade showed it, and I have no one to blame but myself for that ordeal because of my own actions. Sure there were some stuff that was out of his control, but for the large part, it was him that caused the movie to fail.

    • @sulffffffur
      @sulffffffur 7 лет назад +1

      MetallicaRules No, he didn't rewrite it. A ghostwriter did. So you might need to go back to the drawing board with that wall of text.

  • @henchmen999
    @henchmen999 5 лет назад +1

    Jesus, even this comedy review is harder than hell to watch.

  • @afrog2666
    @afrog2666 4 года назад +1

    PG13 with that ragdoll death scene shown over and over to make sure your kids get traumatized, well, ok then..

  • @JeffreyDeCristofaro
    @JeffreyDeCristofaro 3 года назад

    Wow, I never thought the inflamed amygdala would give off a distinctive odor... thanks for that scientific insight that seemed to come right out of bright of day, M. Night Shamaylan!

  • @suk6323
    @suk6323 3 года назад +1

    The scientologist version of Quiet Place

  • @RJLiams
    @RJLiams 9 лет назад +4

    It would actually be pretty cool if Kati met other humans on Earth. Let's be honest here. 7 billion people on this planet. I highly doubt a quarter of that was actually able to leave Earth. There had to have been humans left behind. Since we're animals ourselves wouldn't it make sense that those left behind evolved to survive such harsh environments over the millennium? It would give credit to "everything has evolved to kill humans."
    You definitely got it right Smeg. This was a huge wasted opportunity.

    • @robertmoore0304
      @robertmoore0304 9 лет назад +2

      Come to think of it, shouldn't there have been some ruined buildings as well?

    • @TiciTotyTony
      @TiciTotyTony 9 лет назад +2

      Oblivion is the better version of this movie :)

    • @thoughtsofaleo2916
      @thoughtsofaleo2916 9 лет назад +1

      +Robert Moore Even after a millennia, there had to have been SOME ruins. We've been here for a while and covered a lot of the landmass -- though Katai doesn't cover much of the planet, he should've run into something during his trip....

    • @Jeffrey314159
      @Jeffrey314159 7 лет назад +1

      Ricky Williams What Cypher Raige should've said was: for a thousand years all lifeforms on this planet have evolved without fear of humans. They are all feral beasts..

    • @floydlooney6837
      @floydlooney6837 6 лет назад +1

      Ricky Williams that might have been a better movie

  • @rushnerd
    @rushnerd 10 лет назад

    WELCOME TO ERF. You nailed it.

  • @monroeriddell5822
    @monroeriddell5822 Год назад +1

    I need to say this: The movie established the atmosphere is unbreathable. So, what the hell are those plants all around producing?!! For anyone who paid attention in science class, you'd know that plants produce oxygen. But if the air is unbreathable on earth, then all the plants would be dead ant the land would be desolate, making that whole thing believable, yet they're clearly green and vibrant throughout the movie!

    • @fermintenava5911
      @fermintenava5911 9 месяцев назад

      Well, technically the atmosphere is mostly unbreathable for humans. That doesn't mean it has no oxygen, but it might have a different composition that we are used to. That has happened all throughout natural history, and there have been plants regardless.
      However, such a difference would probably hold not only a problem for humans, but for the various mammals and birds, because they lived in the same atmosphere as we did.

  • @dauzjinonline
    @dauzjinonline 10 лет назад +4

    Yes..Percy Jackson 2 confirmed.!!

  • @Bllll957
    @Bllll957 8 лет назад +5

    I just learnt that Shyamalan will be working on The Last Airbender 2 after his movie Split. Please, can we make a petition or something to erase him from existence??

    • @elsamaria2999
      @elsamaria2999 8 лет назад

      What!? I though the Last Airbender was a flop. Why would they make a sequel to a flop?

    • @Bllll957
      @Bllll957 8 лет назад

      +Elsa Maria because Shitmalan us a self-indulgent arrogant dude who can produce and write his own movie? Because he's filthy rich because he made so many shitty movies? :s

    • @MetallicaRules
      @MetallicaRules 7 лет назад

      He has said that he would start working on the script, but let's be real here, no studio would ever greenlight it, not after the critical failure of the first one and with how public perception of the movie has only gotten worse and worse as time has gone on. Not to mention that the entire thing would have to be recast since it's been 7 years and most likely none of the original cast would even want to come back after the first train wreck of a film.

  • @DrShaym
    @DrShaym 9 лет назад +7

    I'm drinking a store-brand soda while I watch this and it tastes like shit.

  • @wildgirl6557
    @wildgirl6557 9 лет назад +4

    Cinematic Excrement, can you review the film version of A sound of thunder.

  • @lolstephsis
    @lolstephsis 10 лет назад +7

    Definitely should have stuck with simple storyline

  • @BubblingBrooke
    @BubblingBrooke 10 лет назад +4

    I really hope it's Percy Jackson 2. It was terrible but at least it had a few funny lines in the beginning.

  • @cheechalker8430
    @cheechalker8430 5 лет назад +3

    What do you get when you mix the Will Smith family and Scientology?
    After Earth

  • @quiettimegaming3642
    @quiettimegaming3642 3 года назад +1

    18:46 lol, you just made a mouthful of beer shoot out of my nose!

  • @origamipein18
    @origamipein18 10 лет назад +1

    Deep down, I knew After Earth was gonna bomb. What's worse is that it was directed by Shyamalan!
    So glad I never saw it.

  • @schwarzerritter5724
    @schwarzerritter5724 8 лет назад +2

    This movie kind of reminded of the Star Trek episode where Quark and Odo (who could not shapeshift at this time) crashed on a random planet. Most of the equipment got destroyed in the crash and the emergency transmitter got damaged, so they have to carry it to a mountain to work. The entire episode is just carried by two characters in ridiculous makeup bickering and it is an entertaining episode.

    • @elsamaria2999
      @elsamaria2999 8 лет назад

      Unlike this movie.

    • @Jeffrey314159
      @Jeffrey314159 8 лет назад

      Star Trek DS9 and Voyager generally sucked due to bad writing and over-reliance on bad cgi

    • @schwarzerritter5724
      @schwarzerritter5724 8 лет назад +2

      Jeffrey314159
      Deep Space 9 had excellent writing. But the CGI was television level.

    • @Jeffrey314159
      @Jeffrey314159 8 лет назад

      +Schwarzer Ritter It was very very bad science fiction.
      And they were always reliving the race riot issue.

    • @schwarzerritter5724
      @schwarzerritter5724 8 лет назад

      Jeffrey314159 What was so bad about it?

  • @masonallen3961
    @masonallen3961 5 лет назад +1

    27:04
    Jaden: I want to work with Mom.
    Will: Me too.
    I’m debating if that was an line in the script or just a conversation between Will and Jaden that was recorded by mistake. Between her roles in the Madagascar films and Girls Trip, I think Jada is single handedly supporting the entire Smith family.

    • @wedgeantilles4712
      @wedgeantilles4712 5 лет назад

      And Collateral.

    • @joejitsu034
      @joejitsu034 4 года назад

      What? I’m pretty sure Will has earned far more money than Jada. In fact, it’s obvious he has 👍

    • @creatrixZBD
      @creatrixZBD Год назад

      The man in the family provides, isn’t that how it’s supposed to go? 😊

  • @SwiftNimblefoot
    @SwiftNimblefoot 9 лет назад +4

    Snicker... Nova Prime? Really? They settled on that, not knowing that Nova Prime was the rather Xenophobic Prime who became NEMESIS Prime... certainly not a guy you wanna annoy by taking his planet. :) (sorry, Transformers reference)

    • @Peridoot3
      @Peridoot3 9 лет назад

      +Swift Nimblefoot And partners with Jhuaxis(Sorry, I dont know how to spell the actual name)

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot 9 лет назад

      Proto Star Jhiaxus. Comes from "Gee, Axe Us", given as an in-joke name to the villain of the G2 comic when the creators learned that their comic will be cancelled in 12 issues, no matter what. :)

    • @Peridoot3
      @Peridoot3 9 лет назад

      Swift Nimblefoot Hah, that's awesome! I wish I knew that b4.

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot 9 лет назад

      Proto Star Read G2! despite the almost Rob Liefeld-ish artwork and the typical nineties grim and grit, it is one of the best Marvel TF stories.

    • @Peridoot3
      @Peridoot3 9 лет назад

      Swift Nimblefoot Ah, ok, thanks dude! I just know who he is thanks to the IDW comics

  • @simonfrederiksen104
    @simonfrederiksen104 3 года назад +1

    where is Cinematic Excrement: Episode 53!?

    • @roberttreacy8271
      @roberttreacy8271 5 месяцев назад

      Since that episode was dedicated to Justin Carmichael (aka Jew Wario), that episode was removed after the news of his abuse came to light.

    • @simonfrederiksen104
      @simonfrederiksen104 5 месяцев назад

      @@roberttreacy8271 this one? ruclips.net/video/Q1b-1_LAH6s/видео.html

  • @Deinonuchus
    @Deinonuchus 9 лет назад +4

    I prefer M. Night Shamalamadingdong.
    Everything bad about the story in this movie can be summed up in this little fact: Will Smith is a Scientologist. (This also explains Jaden Smith's moronic tweets.)

  • @vinny142
    @vinny142 3 года назад +1

    18:38 The more I hear this acting the more he sounds like Cartman. I keep expecting him to say "Respect my authoritaaaah!"

  • @georgesalisbury5996
    @georgesalisbury5996 10 лет назад

    Fun fact: this is actually the first film to be photographed with sony's new fancy 4K camera technology!

  • @Flowerbarrel
    @Flowerbarrel 7 лет назад

    Oh? Now I know who to thank for that traumatizing, never-playing-this-again Walking Dead dog part.

  • @matthewjohngrabow9365
    @matthewjohngrabow9365 4 года назад

    I like that "smelling our fear" thing. I never saw the movie.

  • @frankallen3634
    @frankallen3634 4 года назад

    Even desert plants survive overnight freezes, as long as it isnt extended for days they will be fine with daily icing

  • @sirtalkalotdoolittle
    @sirtalkalotdoolittle 5 лет назад

    Earth looks pretty nice to me. Green and lush.

  • @MrDalevich
    @MrDalevich 4 месяца назад

    I would have though that the functionality of the suit would have been day 1 lesson 1 of his advanced ranger training. Especially a trainee who thought he was 'ready'.

  • @kp4889
    @kp4889 4 года назад

    Can we talk about, that this boy never uses this stabbing thing, just until the end, to stab the creatures that attack him?

  • @SebaZavaK
    @SebaZavaK 10 лет назад +2

    Yeah, Jaden Smith is a pretty decent actor (I liked him in Kung Fu Kid, aka. the Karate Kid remake with no karate in it), but he's INSANE. (Just check out his Twitter account.)

  • @brucebaker810
    @brucebaker810 4 года назад

    The mama bird tontons herself, really. Like the tonton coming to Luke. Splitting itself open. And falling ver Luke to enclose him.
    --------- ----------
    That there wasn't a twist...WAS THE TWIST!