A Viral Moment
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- Опубликовано: 30 июн 2024
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Change Tomorrow Today’s focus is building a bridge within our community to help bring enlightenment, understanding, love and most importantly togetherness. As we discuss difficult and sensitive topics, most of which has caused a rift between us, it’s our wish that we can come together and find solutions. Rather than bashing one another, we’d like you all to accept our differences and enter into dialogue. Change starts there.
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This girl loves to use SIGN (Shame, Insults, Guilt, Need to right) language when she doesn't like a question . Tell her to not use SIGN language when answering a question, i promise you it will be hard for her to do
Men should not ask a woman how their kids are going to be an asset to him. But men should analyze before getting with a single mother , are those kids going to be a liability or not to him.
I like the 3 of you... keep it going!
Only have your kid 2 days a week and then claiming to be a single parent is nasty work 😂
i was about to correct you, but then i went back and listened to it again. you're right. her dad has her daughter, then the baby dad has the child the other 5 days. womp
@klemremy6963 Yea. Reflecting on my “village” over a decade ago. I guess I should be ashamed that I made a great choice in who I had my child with or that my father is an amazing black man who had my back? I won’t.
@@vicbadd Other people raised your child for you so you could go date. Claiming to be a single mother is disingenuous
@@vicbadd you can if you want, or dont. i was actually going to correct him in defense of you, initially, but what he said was actually right. the only point i had in what i said was "i thought you were wrong and was gonna tell you so, but it turns out you werent. ha! I was the one who was wrong." i had to go back and listen to exactly what you said because i thought you were saying your dad had your kid for 2 days and you had it for 5. i misunderstood.
She checkmated herself with that statement. She thought she was flexing
I dont like how she tries to police a bm tone. Meanwhile she can use any type of tone she wants. Blk men need to call out the double standards and selective outrage.
she literally said "i dont wanna deal with drama from a baby momma", which actually implies the BM is angry and volatile, but then also says "i dont think black men should imply that black women are angry". I dont think she really realizes what she's saying when she says it. i watched the whole video and she often says one thing but rejects the principle of her own idea when she hears it from someone else in other words.
@klemremy6963 Drama from a baby mother implies that the BM is the problem? Not the baby mother? I clearly said sometimes people don’t know how to let go. I was not referring to the BM only. We hear about these domestic issues often and it is indeed something to be concerned about. Both men and women can be violent. My cohost was concerned about the children I was concerned about drama and my wellbeing which is a fair concern for anyone, male or female.
What’s your name ?
Me: Tigers drink coffee
That’s not what I ask
Me: I answered the way I wanted.
🤦🏾♂️
@DADECOUNTYSHOOTA Basically. And guess what, at that point you have the right to do what? Walk away. 😂 life is about choices.
When the brother asked “ how are your kids an asset to me” what I thought he meant was, “ since I as a man, with no children, have to come in and take care of not only you, but your children as well, what do I get from that? “ Which I think is more than a reasonable question since the sister mentioned that she wanted nothing to do with men that have children and also, that she basically brings herself to the table, and that if you don’t want to take care of her kids then you’re not even a real man. Rewind the tape is you don’t believe me.
I actually would be cool dating a single mother if I already had kids and my relationship failed. But as a single man myself with no children whatsoever, I would never lol.
Genuine question for the sister, in what way does it make me less of a man to not want to commit to a woman who has children that aren’t genetically mine? Is that not just another form of standard that men have same as you. You literally said you wouldn’t date a man who has children that weren’t yours because of likely drama with the mother. Do you think it’s possible to extend that logic to men that have the same standards?
Lastly why should a man take on kids that aren’t his? Love ain’t enough. You know this, that’s why you need a brotha with some resources. Why should you just loving a man be enough for that man to take care of you and your children?
I acknowledge that I could just be so flawed that I’m unloveable, but, it has been my general experience that “love” has never been enough for anyone or anything especially when relationships are concerned. Who I am as a person and how I treat those around me and my community don’t matter to women at all. Only what I can do and how I look matters. Doesn’t matter how much I love my job if I can’t do it well. So I have to stay on it and get results.
Just because you don’t have a toxic parental dynamic doesn’t mean that it’s not the norm for people in general and single parents in particular, nor does it invalidate the experiences of others.
I acknowledge that as a 26 year old with nothing but fails ( for relationships ) under his belt that I am clearly a flawed individual and still have plenty to learn. Maybe I’m just a crappy person. Maybe I’m just hideous. But I don’t think I’m wrong about this
@DariusYoung I love the way you posed your questions and your train of thought in general. Failed relationships or not you seem to be a pretty level headed person. I’ll attempt to answer the questions asked.
1) I am hesitant to date men with children. I have done so in the past. The gentleman that asked the question has children as well.
2) that doesn’t make you less of a man. I believe you should date according to your preferences. We all should.
@DariusYoung 3) I stated I take care of my children. I stated I am not looking for a man to come in and take care of them.
Again this all boils down to preference. Some men don’t want to date women with kids and that’s okay. Once you learn the woman has kids you can decline.
@@vicbadd I hear you and you’re right, we all have preferences and should act on them. I think the other part of that particular back and forth though was the double standard applied to the preference. I would think a man was a little crazy if he had kids but said he wouldn’t date a woman with kids. Yes, it’s a preference, but if you’re gonna say that then people are definitely gonna look at you funny lol. That’d be like a guy saying he only dates women with cars, except he doesn’t have a car himself. Again, we’re all adults, so do what you wanna do, but just like ladies tell us that we probably need to stop looking for pretty women and just get what we can because we’re average men, well the same applies here. Having kids puts women in the same sort of arena as average men. Yeah we can be good people individually, but because of our inherent station, it’s just tougher for us when there are more desirable options available.
As much as women don’t like this to be the case, children automatically remove said woman from being “top tier” or anything like that in the eyes of most men.
If you think you’re top tier personally, that’s great! We should all have good self esteem for sure. Not saying to think of yourself any less at all. What I am saying is that, in the eyes of the vast majority of men, mostly due to the fact that we’re still animals, do not want to deal with another man’s children at all, even in a removed capacity. People love comparing humans to lions. Well, the male lions tend to un alive any of the cubs that are left from the previous males rule once they’ve taken over a pride. Of course I’m not insinuating anything like that would or should happen to human children, I’m just saying that you’ll find this to be the case in most parts of nature.
All that to say, just because something is a preference, doesn’t make it reasonable. If that’s the way you wanna go then more power to you, for sure! I honestly respect how you said it with your chest and stood on what you said! Mad respect! I would just like to offer the possibility that a change in perspective may open up new horizons for you…
But again, I’m just a nerd. Lives alone, and it’s still figuring stuff out. Please take everything I just said with the largest of salt grains.
Also thank you for taking the time to respond to me! That rarely happens ( probably because I’m long winded lol)
@@vicbadd last thing I’ll say on this. Any man who gets in a relationship with a woman that has kids and does take care of said kids and what ever other children that may come is an American Hero and should be treated as such (unless of course he’s obviously abusive like putting his hands on you or your children or stealing or name calling or anything like that)
I'm going to be honest, the only person on the podcast that was positive throughout was the brother that was/is married with children. The other brother sounded too red pillish and as far as the sisters concerned I was with her until she said that she wouldn't date men with children because there might be some drama to it which is not necessary the case. But overall the podcast is good. Keep her going
I think she was being 1-sided as well. She shames guys for not dating single moms, but she won't date single dad's?
i think she just didnt have a good concept of what she's saying. well none of them recognized that they had the same point, just about different people in the situation. she focused on drama with the baby mom. he focused on drama with the kids. i think she just rejected it because it excluded her and made her not an option for ppl like him.
@@klemremy6963that one guy was solid
@WeOnLocNation Thank you 😊 and to add context, yes I’m hesitant due to drama but I am not against dating men with children.