1. Effort 2. Chivalry 3. Genuine interest 4. Responsible and secure 5. Communication skills Thank you, I agree with most of this. Still working on #2, though I am planning to defeat my rival in a jousting tournament next week and dedicate my victory to her.
@@bobarvianto5550 lmao na thats why men cant be fukd anymore what is it a fukn science what have they got to.offer for you to be perfecting formulas. Nothing and no effort.
It is possible fellas to be a gentleman while also being very masculine. There is a big difference between nice guys, bad boys, and good men (notice the word choice behind the adjectives)
@@drip369 My girlfriend seemed quite enamoured by the iron age style spear in my bedroom she saw on our first video meetup (I think it was between our 1st & 2nd IRL dates) - she suggested I must have it for capturing women...
@@simontmn haha dude! On my livingroom wall, seen in pics and on IG are my double sided axes with the middle poker, skull in the center of the spokes and many girls always wanna touch em hahaha they're probably a few pounds each. Definitely always gets brought up. I always lock my trigger guards before any arrivals haha
I had met a girl online. Our 1st date happen to be on my birthday. She was polite enough to get me a funny birthday card. I thought is was sweet & genuine. I didn't even mention my b-day. She had remembered from seeing my profile. We ended up dating for one year.
My ideal first dates...shooting pool, bowling, puppy play date, coffee (though I don't drink it often), etc. Dinner dates for first date is overrated and flowers are a bit much. On a side note, a girl and I have a mutual favorite song and her birthday is coming up soon. I'm practicing playing it on guitar and record a video to send it to her. Something thoughtful
Giving an effective compliment comes to specificity and realness. Only give a compliment when you actually WANT to give one and make sure it's about something she did rather than the obvious (i.e. You're so beautiful/gorgeous). If she put a lot of effort into her outfit or she says something interesting or has knowledge and passion about a particular topic, complimenting that will have a great impact.
Went on a first date with an awesome woman recently and it was the first time I felt strongly attracted to both intellect and approach to life/worldview of a potential partner. I let her know my appreciation in a genuine yet humorous way and she took it really well. I doubt we'd have had such a great date if I just complimented her looks in a shallow way (which I could have done, since I found her to be quite attractive physically as well)
Great list. When I started dating, my parents made sure I knew all of these. Funny story, I went out with a woman to a fancy restaurant and she was shocked when I opened the door for her and pulled out her chair when we sat down. She told me it was the first time a guy had done that for her.
That’s awesome man! I went out with a girl a couple weeks ago, got her flowers and she said it was the first time she ever received flowers, I was shocked lol
I would add one little item, treat the service personnel (wait staff, bus staff, etc). If you do that you will be desirable, as a decent person. But some of these can be boiled down to: be interesting to her as well as interested in her.
I look for chemistry and “natural” flow. It’s more subconscious, I suppose, but I observe her mannerisms that indicate her sense of character & awareness.
I'm glad that you take into consideration that there are guys who mean well, even if they might make mistakes out of nervousness, and that it doesn't have to be because of things like narcissism on his part.
An interesting take I've heard about chivalry is that one shouldn't be chivalrous towards just women. One should be chivalrous towards everyone in general.
My biggest problem lately is when connecting online to someone and exchanging in a conversation and then being ghosted as soon as i attempt to plan a meet. It seems too many people just want to chat but get weird when you try to eventually proceed to the next step. I just think online chats have kind of taken the place of actual in person interaction. Not a good direction imo
How much are you talking to them before asking to meet? I haven't had your experience but I also plan the meetup without spending too much time texting
@@JAREDGRAF8181 we talk about job, area we live, experience on the site, etc.. We don't get into detail about personal stuff like family but just the general background. I figure a few days of communicating should be enough if the right questions and info are conducted. It seems it's not about the answers but about people just wanting pen pals. I tell you it's weird.
@@pdg61met That could be why. I get it though. Those are obviously all the things you'd want to know but you gotta remember her inbox is fuuuuuulllll of guys asking the same stuff. Gets really boring for them. I just try to joke around about something for like 5-10 messages then tell them we should meetup.
I have been watching your videos for a while now, they’re really helping. Not only am I better around ladies, I’m also feeling a difference in other areas of my life too. Thanks a lot for your great and honest advices, you’re a true hero!
@@CourtneyRyan I find a combination of your videos and those by Alexander Grace combine to give a really good perspective. Your tone is softer but you have a lot of good common sense, he is a bit harsher and goes a bit deeper into psychology. Your lighter touch is a really good compliment to his style, it would be cool to see you interview or just chat with him some time.
Things men should look for in a woman: Is she late? (Does she have any respect for your time?) How does she treat the wait staff and hostess? Does she drink too much? Does she always get the most expensive thing on the menu? Is she playing on her phone while you’re sitting there thinking ,”WTF” How much effort did she put in? Did she wear makeup? Did she dress up? Does she thank you for the meal? Was she interested in you and your life or did she just want to talk about herself? Or even worse just play on her phone and get a free meal?
Oh believe me bro, I’ve leaned by now if she’s red flagging and breaking most of the rules you listed. While she’s in the bathroom, doing whatever, I’ve called the waiter/waitress over, asked them to do separate checks while handing them my card and a $20 bill to speed up the process. Before the girl is even done washing her hands in the bathroom, my check has been paid, with tip covered. The best payback is the dumb bitch coming back to the table, not even glancing at the check book, thinking I’m picking up the tab, while I tell her I’m all set, she just needs to pay her side….with a fat grin on my face 😈
1 Actually... While women will respond to things like tall, rich, and handsome (and also, things like race), these aren't predictors of long-term relationship happiness. So says Big Data. 😊 Do women have to be chivalrous, too, or is it only a one-way street? What would that look like? Offering to pay her half of the bill? Or are there other behaviors high-quality women should be displaying?
well, modern chivalry is vastly different from what chivalry was intended to be. The concept was to help people in need (usually women because they were needier back then). And 50 years ago, women didn't work so they couldn't pay and both genders considered them to more delicate than men. Now, women have achieved income parity and insist on being equal to men in other ways too, EXCEPT in the dating world where they want to eat their cake and have it too (they want chivalry but also equality, whichever is beneficial to them at the time). Now someone please tell me why I should have to pay for a woman's meal when she earns the same or more, and is competing for the same promotion? It absolutely sickens me to be treated that way.
Happy hump day Courtney! Great information Courtney and to me, first impressions always count whether it's a date, or a job interview, etc. Make it count 🙏🏻
I’d like to add a couple, though these aren’t exclusive to girls and first dates, these can apply to any friendship or relationship. Smile and make them laugh. And when I said make them laugh I don’t mean be corny and start doing comedy routines. I mean just be generally humorous, if the personality suits you. Some people don’t have any humor in them whatsoever, and for them I wouldn’t force it as it would be awkward. But these are two qualities that from a psychological perspective, warm you up to someone on a subconscious level. People like being around others who smile, give off warm, positive charming vibes, and make them laugh. It makes them feel comfortable and at ease and you desire to be around people who make you feel happy being around them. Happiness and positivity rubs off!
About #4, I feel like women these days want guys who go out and get drunk and do drugs because they’re more social and fun and stuff like that. I personally am not super social. And I hate getting drunk. I never have and never will. I mean, I still want an attractive girl, but I shouldn’t have to potentially risk my life just to get one.
You shouldn’t want to be with a girl who wants that anyways if it doesn’t align with your values. I don’t drink either, I promise there are other girls who feel the same!
If you're with a girl and she says she needs a guy like that, be grateful. Because now you know to not waste your time on her anymore and find someone else.
I had this concern when I quite drinking a few years ago. Its honestly never been an issue though. I also realized that if a woman doesn't like me because I abstain from unhealthy things, then she is absolutely not someone I want to associate with.
There are plenty of really attractive women that admire guys that don’t drink or do drugs as long as they’re interesting. That’s the caveat. If you’re boring that’s the reason she’s not interested, it’s not the sobriety 😂
On my first dates , I’ve always told myself this “What would James Bond do?” I got that tip from Corey Wayne. Being charming & mysterious has worked well for me.
It can. Bear in mind-- James Bond is a fictional character, so that will only take you so far. Find men who are successful with the type of relationship model you want to achieve, and emulate them. 👍
I guess it depends on which version of James Bond you’re talking about. Some of the older ones were pretty aggressive and handsy with every attractive woman they happened to come in contact with. They followed the philosophy of “50 no’s followed by a yes is still a yes”
this is spot on as always Courtney 🙂 as a man, I can't help but notice the nice vids have a bias towards catering to women. us guys look for stuff too. there was a clue about not berating the guy that opens the door for you. should the girl take the initiative with something like "let me get us the ride" or "I'll cover the bar tab before dinner," that is going to be huge. just showing up, even if pretty, is not enough. zero initiative means zero future dates by *my* choice. in fact, even the first date might not make it past the bar/appetizers should there be some entitlement attitude or no participation. the things girls do and expect don't have to be the same things that guys do and expect. I still sure do appreciate when the man's perspective is also included. "5 Things .. Turning People OFF!" is a good example 😎
It's worth noting there's a balance between 2 and 4. Insisting on the former can come across as insecurity in many conditions. I have a relative who went on a date once. She happened to get to the restaurant door first and opened it for her date. His reply as she got near was to annoyingly complain "I'll get that!" in a whiny voice instead of thanking her for doing it. Once he showed that side of him he ruined his chances and there was no further dates. A good rule of thumb is to be chivalrous with a gal, but if she gets there first and tries to be polite to you, accept it to show security in yourself. If you're seriously looking for a relationship you'll need this anyway. It's a two way street.
Loving your content Courtney! Been watching for a couple months now and your content has been so inspiring and refreshing in my journey to sharing a fulfilling life with a valuable good girl. A great insight you made that a girl who denies chivalry and doesn’t allow you to pay for her ticket is a red flag makes a lot of sense now
Excellent video Court. Men, this is just old school 101 dating strategy. It is and will always be your responsibility to make sure the date is a success. Make plans, dress nice, good hygiene, good eye contact, be polite and thoughtful. Make the date completely about her. Ask thought provoking questions, shut up and listen. Add additional questions to her last response. Only supply personal information or anything about yourself if she asks. Make sure she feels safe, comfortable, and that your genuinely excited about her being there. Do nothing that even remotely suggests anything sexual. This is a key point she is looking for. The first date tends to be more of a interview for women. You are being evaluated for a possible relationship. Your being critiqued that entire night. Just have fun and let the date flow. This will make her feel comfortable. Pay for the damn meal ! If it goes well and she feels a connection. You may get another date. Remember, if she is a high value woman she has a truck load of options. Good Luck ! "Men display, Women choose"
You forgot to kiss her feet in the end . Dafuk is this shit,it's not a job interview,it's a 2 sided communication. If you do all this shit it's like you say " I'm 100% yours ,you don't have to bring nothing into the table ,now I have to make you like me " No ,you test as well
Can you do a video on eyeglasses and/or sunglasses for men? For example I sometimes wear aviator sunglasses; but lately I've been getting comments that I look like a cop and very unapproachable. It's even worse when I wore a baseball cap with the aviators.
A girl I dated didn't like me being chivalrous. She is a feminist and used to say I don't need a guy doing things for me. She never said no when I used to pay for her though. She stopped dating me hope it was for the good.
It was. Women can be feminists and in favor of equality, while appreciating men who treat them respectfully. If what she was saying, is that she prefers to be treated like crap, then you did the right thing-- you made space for a guy who can do that for her. Or, if she gets sick of dating the guys, she can chase women, and find out how the other half lives. 🙄
She don't need to man leads to her becoming the man she wants to marry crying why no one wants her and she'll end up miserable. It's sad. Feminazis surely spread lies and ruin lives.....that's why Courtney is a blessing to her male&female audience. She shows men what to look for and exemplifies what women should seek to "be"
Does doing chivalrous things mean anything to women? (Holding doors open, offering your jacket, standing when she leaves/arrives at the table when you're out for dinner, walking on the side closest to the traffic when you're walking on the sidewalk together {In case a car is out of control and jumps the curb, the man would be hit first.}, etc.). Or is that all old fashioned now?
Chivalry is a code amongst Knights of Yore - it meant that they would not run a civilian through with their knife, sword, lance, axe, arrow or bludgeon. It was never about opening doors or pulling out seats.
I'm not sure about being direct... it depends on the situation and how far has the dating been going. If you are very straight forward on a first date that you are looking for something serious for example, you can come off as needy/desperate, and also women like mystery, if you take away the mystery from the beggining, it can kill the attraction.
As long as you leave to others the responsibility to make you happy, you will always be miserable, because that is actually your job? Linda Alfieri It is high time I addressed something there's a narrative that men in general louse in life or are at disadvantage with regard to dating. So many things are wrong with that notion. Many problems we men face are also faced by women but in different ways. We all suffer from loneliness, heartbreak, lack of self-control and fear of humiliation. I think we should not base our whole existence on what genitalia we have rather try to be human for once! Don't get me wrong of course we are men, and of course, there are women but our gender identity is secondary and our individual identity is primary. For example, I was born male but when someone asks me who I am ii don't say that I am a MAAAN( neither would anyone with any sense) but I say I am Avid Hossan, a random guy on the internet. Your life is not about your gender, race, ethnicity or anything stupidly superficial like that it's about you, all of you!
Hey Courtney! What is your opinion of whether or not a guy should pay for the first date? As a guy, I believe we should but many men (including myself) have been taken advantage of by women that are just looking for free drinks or a free meal.
If you're worried about that, then I would pre-screen her, before you even ask her out. You should have standards. That not only makes you more attractive, but also saves you time and money. From there, do gradual escalations of time, resources, and commitment. Start with a coffee date, or one in a park. If she's the right woman, it won't matter as much. If she's the wrong woman (only after free meals and drinks), that should get rid of her quickly. Good luck! 😊
You can do it for your Wife, Mom, Sister. However, in my sight, NO!!!. You do not know how your so-called relationship are going to developing. If you are gonna doing tis with every woman always....., bankrupcy will come sooner or later. I do remember myself a couple of years ago when I refused to do this, She was shocked but after.....she began respecting and loving me afterwards. So, keep in touch with your Dignity
avoid meeting them for a meal. I've come across waaay too many women who are only interested as long as I'm providing food and entertainment. Women have no problems saying no when they want to. Men should not feel bad about saying no either.
Need your help with a watch purchase…..please pick one from your (not Teddy’s point of view). #1) Rolex Yacht-Master blue dial #2). Cartier Santos medium Thanks much, Courtney! Always appreciate a woman’s perspective
1. Effort (how much u put into first impresion, style...) 2. Be a gentleman. 3. Genuine interest (ask questions, don't look at other girls...) 4. Give a compliment (not sexualized) 5. Responsability, security (show on time, don't drink to much). 6. Good comunication skills.
Thank you for your wisdom. I am recently cut loose to date from 26 years of marriage. I don't know if flowers on 1st date is good. Its awkward to have flowers to deal with walking around having dinner. I like the idea but i don't know of its a burden and old fashion in a bad way.
I do hope maybe one day I can meet Courtney ryan it whould be cool to talk to her i think she is so beautiful and always gives good advice thank you Courtney and the people who replied y'all be safe out there
You can do all this and a bad boy can still come in and ruin everything. You can do everything right and become a couple and a bad boy can still come and ruin everything Love doesn’t exist in 2022. You are merely the current option while they wait for the better option to arrive.
Great content, Its interesting hearing the female perspective. The only thing I disagree with is that a man should text you after the date. Since we have done all the Persuing through asking you out and setting up the date. To follow up with a text after the date communicates an over eagerness in my view. There's some psychology to this. If a woman is unsure of how the date was for you it makes her think about you non stop until she can't take the suspense anymore and sends you a nice text about how she had a great time (assuming she actually did). Its important to then communicate to her you also had a great time and then it's now a man's responsibility to take the lead and set up another date. Just drawing from my experiences. This approach has given me more success. This may be misconstrued as "game" but I think most women unwittingly play it a bit to determine any disqualifying criteria.
On a great first date I had recently, I let her know I had a great time and would love to see her again and just paused for a couple of seconds. She actually took initiative and asked for my number, and texted me the same evening. Since I asked her out in the first place, I think we've both taken some initiative now, which feels like a pretty good sign
@@max8m1 Its different if you do it in person versus text. It can actually communicate strength and assertiveness if you do it face to face. So great job mate.
@@callumpistell1574 Thanks man, appreciate it. Over the last couple years I've grown a lot more confident in myself and happy with my life overall, and I think it truly helped my chances of finding a good partner. I'm not foolish enough to moon after a woman after the first date, but I do hope it continues to go well :)
I would never be caught using my phone on a date, especially since even when I go shopping or I'm at work I always leave it behind (even though I know right now I am on my phone at work but it is in the cup holder and I always plan some free time at 11 a.m. Wednesdays and Fridays)
Totally fine with this list - as long as she is neither a promiscuous woman nor a single mother. There’s no way on Earth I’d ever (knowingly) put in so much effort for either.
What do I look for? Well, I definitely look for eye contact, posture, table manners, and listen for humility&manners just to make sure that first impression in-person matches consistently the more we hang out
separated 1 year ago, back trying to date at the age of 50.. showed all that in a lot of 1st dates.. not going anywhere.. I am a bjj athlete, fit, job stable, etc.. no luck whatsoever.. Toronto is a terrible city for dating.. your videos are great btw!
Something I will usually do especially when going out with with woman at night is to ask if they would like me to walk them to their car or wait with them if they Uber. It's a small touch but I want to make sure they are safe before I go.
I have never dated. The woman who later became my wife was in my tent three days after we had met. I kicked her out. She had to wait three years until I finally said YES. It was probably a mistake, but we had been happily married for 32 years until she died. I hope sharing my experience with women will help someone. Cheers!
Recap: 1. Is his name Justin? 2. Does he follow Courtney Ryan? 3. Does he make comments on RUclips videos? 4. Is he good at making lists? 5. I can’t think of a fifth right now You’re welcome, everybody
Alcohol literally ruined my entire life!😩 Although I'm from Northern Ireland and _everyone_ drinks, especially on dates. Most girls I know can drink American men under the table.
Girl I’m interested in at work was flirting with me saying my cologne is intoxicating, acting shy around me, smiley all the time etc last night she said something about her doing a strip tease and “maybe ull get to see it one day” so I asked her out on the spot. (Keep in mind I’ve only had 1 legitimate convo with her and a couple back and fourth one liners, also never validate or compliment her and keep it short, and ignore her 90% of the time) She said maybe, and I laughed and said I don’t do maybes. She then said well she has a boyfriend right now but she’s working on leaving him because she’s unhappy. I just said o okay and kept it moving. She was cheesing hard after I walked away.She then came around later to tell me she felt she didn’t word that right (she made it sound like she didnt mean it to sound like a no?) she wasn’t expecting me to ask her out and her heart was pounding but she told me that she would love to hang out but she’s not the type to cheat or something . I just said okay we’ll take my number. She then said her bf goes through her phone but she has ig. I said nah I don’t do ig. ( she only has like 70 followers so idk if she’s one of those types)shes not the baddie type. seems like a nice unexperienced girl. she didn’t seem weirded out. I just said I understand and told her to have a good night. Now today we haven’t spoken at all, but she was talking to all the beta simps that giv her attention. I plan on just giving her space and waiting for her to reach out to me. What you guys think? I don’t think she would of told me she is trying to leave her boyfriend if she wasn’t a little interested nah?
Sounds like she's a tease that just craves attention. She switched from you to the Beta Simps when things got too real for her when you asked her out. Also, gotta say it, She's not being that much of a "nice girl" if she's flirting with everyone when she's got a BF (or says she has), don't put this girl on a pedestal. Honestly your plan is right though, just give her space and wait for her to reach out. I doubt she will and in any case, dating a girl at work isn't a great move anyway.
This is a make or break like a job interview. Act interested when she talks to you. Eye contact is very important. Stay off your phone. Add some humor. We love that.
For me the main cause of not connecting with people, be it dating or friendship, was lack of genuine interest in people. I found out about my resentment towards people, pessimistic (and not realistic btw) worldview, personal fears, traumas and lack of knowledge and competence in human relationships, lack of insight about myself (WHAT do I do and WHY, what do I WANT. Knowing correct answer to these questions requires honesty with yourself, ability of critical thinking). There is no shortcuts - you are who you are, there is no way of pretending to be they way you actually don't feel without harming at least one person out of two. You are strong, capable and attractive. The problem is not lack of value. It may be just not enough maturity: lack of knowledge about yourself and people, lack of competence in social skills and self regulation skills, lack of ability to set and achieve your goals in systematic way with critical thinking. One step at the time. Use your mind to find the best ways of achieving something, don't dive into the endless sea of abstract ideas, it is useful instrument, but without acting and analyzing results of your actions you will be overwhelmed with thoughts while standing in the same place in life. Ask yourself what is the matter of the situation, find the problem/set goal, find multiple ways of achieving desired goal, choose the best solution and apply it, analyze the result. Repeat. In order to solve a problem, you must first identify it correctly. And this requires honesty with oneself, critical and logical thinking, a sufficient understanding of the subject. And remember to have enough rest! Take care!
Very good comment. I need this, I want to have relationships with direction and purpose. Sometimes I lost interest because of improper planning and having no genuine purpose for the relationship. Especially where I thought the person is not attractive enough I would say "well I will not go for long term anyway so what's the point of putting more effort"
Random question but do you ever feel that we have all this advice for what men should do but never look at what women are not doing?? I think men should always put their best foot forward no matter what, and dating is suppose to be hard. If dating wasn't hard people would never leave the market. But i think we a promoting men to be gentlemen, but what does that say about women out there? Are they not dating gentlemen? are gentlemen not attractive to women for them to give them a chance? I can say from experience and from asking women, a lot of women have low standards for men (they have been with) but are promoting the opposite. I mean just look at all the single moms and what not. I hope men and women keep striving to be the best because that what we are meant to be and nothing less.
The great women have already gotten the memo. The other women, well... it's a buyer's market for them. Life isn't fair, but their attitudes do change at about 40 or so, due to necessity. They hit the Wall, and if they don't have a guy at that point, the pickings start to get slim.
Hey Courtney! I love your channel and all the tips you give us fellas out there 😊 Keep it up as I always enjoy seeing a new video! One small thing I noticed when the words "communication skills" came up is that communication is spelt incorrectly. No biggie! I'll be sure to add these 5 tips to my list to remember 😄
I agree with questions; and making it reciprocal, that s why I always found useful the I ask you answer then switch roles back and forth about passions, fav things to do, wathever, you can also use this as an escalation method. Don’t neglect kino (when appropiate) too, to escalate physical contact (also as a way to test, her responsiveness to you lightly casually touching her, maybe side ways just a rub of the arms, shoulder, etc) and also what is being talked about being more funny and sexual (in a progressive way to not come up as creepy at first) you don’t want to talk about her looks, maybe something more like hey I like your shirt so much, looks lovely on you. Instead of damn girl ya hot. (Yeah me and how many other girls? , then you loose the is he going to be secure to me if I choose him, no one likes to be cheated, yet they like competition, so being preselected is accepted, it’s more of a future kind of thing they don’t want the prince to be a beast after, but the beast to become their king) I’m also thinking about how well cream and Black combines, I saw the 75 suit combination out of 5 and those 2 are some with navy blue white and that other lighter blue… and keep linking conversations to escalate and have a multidate. You can just have coffee. Or you can have a coffe and say hey you mind coming for some milk I need to buy my mother? So you have made multiple memories stored on her to afterwards think about. Being a gentleman or educated should be priority for everyone in general, you want to treat others well. Also adds conversation too, oh let me walk in this side of the road is about chivalry you knew why this was? If a car comes crashing into us I can stop it with my superpowers (playfulness) well not really although I’m strong! Works better if you are actually not that strong, but this comes from ancient times to protect when carriages came by so you didn’t get muddy protected by the man; also you feel more protected this way having man and wall to avoid purse steals etc.. this add story, interesting facts, you caring about her. Brownie points to cash in later when having more connection styles of interpersonal… sex, I mean sex. But it’s not all about just sex. It’s about being compatible, secure, able to have fun together, and enjoy sex to the fullest. Oh wow we just talked about the same thing hehe you go girl! It’s basic stuff really so sad some people don’t get to know this, so I’m very happy to see channels like this that help others, good job! Yeah texting after is super important. I really enjoyed our time together. Looking forward to meet you again. Then after, you have demonstrated interest and now it’s ok to make her miss you a bit Oh that feeling of connecting with someone is so nice, maybe that’s why I’m a bit astrofetichist (I like finding compatible people a lot, and I use the astrology medium for it) I don’t know if this even exists, I just invented it to understand my own feelings. Have a nice day I’ll keep watching your interesting channel and giving you feedback. In business is important that a leader has a elevator methodology (saying to have proper feedback from workers etc) a chain is as strong as it’s weakest link, and sometimes who really know the product are not the ceos but the mere workers installing it knowing customers what fails etc etc so that’s why I like to give my feedback and fills my ego a bit too. So sorry if I’m intense, I’m just really excited about the conversations and info sparked from your content. It’s amazing to me. I lost my friends when little and had to learn to seduce to not be alone. So I like this a bit.
Hey Courtney every time I try to make the first impression & walk up & approach to a Girl that I like all they do is just walk away from me. Why does that happen to me every time ?
@@CourtneyRyan Ok but it has been going for me for a long time ever since I was in the 7th Grade in Middle School until now still in College but I gotta ask Y.R. Beautiful California Dime Girls so DANE Judgey all the time to us nice guys
@Ante Petrish try approaching women with a friendly view and get advice. Ask them what can you do better and what you can work on when approaching women. Women love helping men, most men do not have the confidence to do it. Furthermore, it allows a women to be brutally honest knowing that she is helping you. Do it with many people around so she feels safe (places where women frequent, coffee shops, gym, etc). Build your confidence and figure your best optimal approach. Trial and error works but you have to view it from a womens' point of view, they do not know you nor do they know what you want from them. Example: never approach a woman from behind or without a genuine charismatic aura.
@@CourtneyRyan Wait, this has got to be some sort of pick-up line. "...Congratulations on the pregnancy..." "...I’m not pregnant..." "... well, the night is still young..." I'm so sorry, I'll get my coat.
Women want chivalry but put zero effort in themselves these days. Maybe if they start to treat us better all these things like chivalry will come back. Men are generally now putting in exactly what we are getting back which isnt much at all.
@Tony Sayers. So true, brother. Women were prettier, more ladylike and worthy of respect back in the "Old days", ('70's and '80's). No 300 lb. women with tattoos and body piercings back then.
I wish courteney was my girlfriend but she is already in a relationship it sucks but I hope the guy she is with treats her right makes her feel special etc
Nr 1 is a strange point. For most men it is extremely difficult to get a date. Many have to invest dozens to hundreds of hours for a date. How much effort do you expect? The whole lifetime for a single date?
Hundreds? Dude you're picking the wrong women. Choose girls who choose you. Invest in those whom invest in you. Sounds like you need some social-proof on your side
@@drip369 not hundreds of hours for one woman of course. That's all time added together from one date to the next. I've never met a woman who chose me. This choice does not exist for me.
Courtney - Are great women (with values and looks like you ... tbh) still around at age 30-40? Or are they already gone by that point? Are they on dating apps, or are the great ones mainly found the old-fashioned way of real life interaction?
Being on time is about how one manages their own time AND about being courteous and respecting another's (not just a date's) time. Furthermore, if he/she has a clock on the date, then YOU just wasted date time.
4:43 - 2 drinks Courtney ?? That almost seems a bit restrained .. If I'm going out to have drinks with a girl, I want us both to have a good time .. Not like it has to be St. Patty's Day but just ya know casual drinking .. Just go with the flow : ) Especially if your maybe dancing or playing pool or shooting darts or something .. Big factor is the type of drink it might be AND how long you are at the bar and if you are going to different places throughout the night .. If you're both drinking Long Island Iced Teas then yes 2 or 3 is plenty for each of you lol !!! But no chance I'm having 2 Bud Lights for the entire night if I got all prepped and shaved etc and to go out on a date with a girl. Some bars are so bad with the mixed drinks. They do the small plastic cups load it with ice and hardly any booze and both guys and gals can easily drink them quickly .. Especially if you are out dancing at a nice club or something Can you imagine as a guy waiting in line to get into a club/bar with a girl and saying, "Listen, we are both at a 2 drink maximum tonite." That's lame lol .. Heck she might even skip out of line with you thinking you are broke and don't have money lol .. All guys are trying to impress and show up to her on a 1st date but Geesh I'd also like to enjoy my time out too !!! I worked all week as well .. Don't have to get drunk or sloppy. I think all of us that are responsible know when enough is enough and as someone that can handle themselves 2 drinks is just warm up time if you ask me ; ) If I'm actually going out especially in this day and age I'm having more than 2 ..
1. Effort
2. Chivalry
3. Genuine interest
4. Responsible and secure
5. Communication skills
Thank you, I agree with most of this. Still working on #2, though I am planning to defeat my rival in a jousting tournament next week and dedicate my victory to her.
6. Cowboy hat.
na too much effort and interest too clingy seeya later youll get ghosted
@@alexr9349 its about how much you show it, too much or too little will send them the wrong message
@@bobarvianto5550 lmao na thats why men cant be fukd anymore what is it a fukn science what have they got to.offer for you to be perfecting formulas. Nothing and no effort.
7. PhD
Or… ?
It is possible fellas to be a gentleman while also being very masculine. There is a big difference between nice guys, bad boys, and good men (notice the word choice behind the adjectives)
Absolutely!!!
@@CourtneyRyan there has been this phrase spreading around for a while now that women love a civil man who has the potential to be lethal
@@drip369 My girlfriend seemed quite enamoured by the iron age style spear in my bedroom she saw on our first video meetup (I think it was between our 1st & 2nd IRL dates) - she suggested I must have it for capturing women...
@@simontmn haha dude! On my livingroom wall, seen in pics and on IG are my double sided axes with the middle poker, skull in the center of the spokes and many girls always wanna touch em hahaha they're probably a few pounds each. Definitely always gets brought up. I always lock my trigger guards before any arrivals haha
I had met a girl online. Our 1st date happen to be on my birthday. She was polite enough to get me a funny birthday card. I thought is was sweet & genuine. I didn't even mention my b-day. She had remembered from seeing my profile. We ended up dating for one year.
My ideal first dates...shooting pool, bowling, puppy play date, coffee (though I don't drink it often), etc. Dinner dates for first date is overrated and flowers are a bit much.
On a side note, a girl and I have a mutual favorite song and her birthday is coming up soon. I'm practicing playing it on guitar and record a video to send it to her. Something thoughtful
So fun! ❤️
@@CourtneyRyan 😊🙏
Such a sweet idea!
@@Introvertedalpha thank you for the support
@@tommygunn6901 You're so welcome! :)
It takes so much courage to face everything you've gone through and remain standing. You're setting a beautiful example for so many people.😇
🥉
@@GurvanCustom FYI, serious shit can happen in the "first world" as well. Stop being so self entitled and self righteous!
False
@@Tondaloona03 yep sickening simping here jesus christ
Giving an effective compliment comes to specificity and realness. Only give a compliment when you actually WANT to give one and make sure it's about something she did rather than the obvious (i.e. You're so beautiful/gorgeous). If she put a lot of effort into her outfit or she says something interesting or has knowledge and passion about a particular topic, complimenting that will have a great impact.
Absolutely!
Yes! 🔥
@@CourtneyRyan What's your take on making a move and going for the kiss on the first date? Thanks
Went on a first date with an awesome woman recently and it was the first time I felt strongly attracted to both intellect and approach to life/worldview of a potential partner. I let her know my appreciation in a genuine yet humorous way and she took it really well. I doubt we'd have had such a great date if I just complimented her looks in a shallow way (which I could have done, since I found her to be quite attractive physically as well)
Great list. When I started dating, my parents made sure I knew all of these.
Funny story, I went out with a woman to a fancy restaurant and she was shocked when I opened the door for her and pulled out her chair when we sat down. She told me it was the first time a guy had done that for her.
🙌🏼 love it!
That’s awesome man! I went out with a girl a couple weeks ago, got her flowers and she said it was the first time she ever received flowers, I was shocked lol
That's so sweet! 💙
I would add one little item, treat the service personnel (wait staff, bus staff, etc). If you do that you will be desirable, as a decent person. But some of these can be boiled down to: be interesting to her as well as interested in her.
10000%
I look for chemistry and “natural” flow. It’s more subconscious, I suppose, but I observe her mannerisms that indicate her sense of character & awareness.
🙌
I'm glad that you take into consideration that there are guys who mean well, even if they might make mistakes out of nervousness, and that it doesn't have to be because of things like narcissism on his part.
Of course!
I really appreciate the acknowledgment that this is all about good women. If you put in effort, it should be for someone's whose worth it.
💯
An interesting take I've heard about chivalry is that one shouldn't be chivalrous towards just women. One should be chivalrous towards everyone in general.
Interesting insight, thanks for sharing!
Be a gentleman to everyone, yes - including other men. It's for your own benefit!
My biggest problem lately is when connecting online to someone and exchanging in a conversation and then being ghosted as soon as i attempt to plan a meet. It seems too many people just want to chat but get weird when you try to eventually proceed to the next step. I just think online chats have kind of taken the place of actual in person interaction. Not a good direction imo
I would only meet people in person. Online chats just add more hurdles, and until you have basic game handled, you don't need extra hurdles.
How much are you talking to them before asking to meet? I haven't had your experience but I also plan the meetup without spending too much time texting
@@JAREDGRAF8181 we talk about job, area we live, experience on the site, etc.. We don't get into detail about personal stuff like family but just the general background. I figure a few days of communicating should be enough if the right questions and info are conducted. It seems it's not about the answers but about people just wanting pen pals. I tell you it's weird.
I agree, this can be a challenge. Thanks for sharing your experience.
@@pdg61met That could be why. I get it though. Those are obviously all the things you'd want to know but you gotta remember her inbox is fuuuuuulllll of guys asking the same stuff. Gets really boring for them. I just try to joke around about something for like 5-10 messages then tell them we should meetup.
I have been watching your videos for a while now, they’re really helping. Not only am I better around ladies, I’m also feeling a difference in other areas of my life too. Thanks a lot for your great and honest advices, you’re a true hero!
I am so glad to hear it! Happy you’re here 😇
@@CourtneyRyan I find a combination of your videos and those by Alexander Grace combine to give a really good perspective. Your tone is softer but you have a lot of good common sense, he is a bit harsher and goes a bit deeper into psychology. Your lighter touch is a really good compliment to his style, it would be cool to see you interview or just chat with him some time.
Exactly right.
The "manosphere" is full of people enabling the grievances of misfits. THIS is positive advice and solid insight.
💯
As a dude of the manosphere - I highly encourage you to follow the advice here.... and then watch the results. We will leave the light on for ya.
@@dedeborya9015 Eh, you need both IME - the light and the dark.
Things men should look for in a woman:
Is she late? (Does she have any respect for your time?)
How does she treat the wait staff and hostess?
Does she drink too much?
Does she always get the most expensive thing on the menu?
Is she playing on her phone while you’re sitting there thinking ,”WTF”
How much effort did she put in? Did she wear makeup? Did she dress up?
Does she thank you for the meal?
Was she interested in you and your life or did she just want to talk about herself? Or even worse just play on her phone and get a free meal?
those are obvious signs but yes I agree.
Oh believe me bro, I’ve leaned by now if she’s red flagging and breaking most of the rules you listed. While she’s in the bathroom, doing whatever, I’ve called the waiter/waitress over, asked them to do separate checks while handing them my card and a $20 bill to speed up the process. Before the girl is even done washing her hands in the bathroom, my check has been paid, with tip covered. The best payback is the dumb bitch coming back to the table, not even glancing at the check book, thinking I’m picking up the tab, while I tell her I’m all set, she just needs to pay her side….with a fat grin on my face 😈
Great video as always Courtney, great insight!! I have a countdown each day until your next upload😂
You’re awesome! Thank you 😊
1 Actually... While women will respond to things like tall, rich, and handsome (and also, things like race), these aren't predictors of long-term relationship happiness. So says Big Data. 😊
Do women have to be chivalrous, too, or is it only a one-way street? What would that look like? Offering to pay her half of the bill? Or are there other behaviors high-quality women should be displaying?
🙌🏼 I’ll make a video!
@@CourtneyRyan I'll watch it. 😁😂
@@CourtneyRyan definitely!🙂
Interesting perception sir.
well, modern chivalry is vastly different from what chivalry was intended to be. The concept was to help people in need (usually women because they were needier back then). And 50 years ago, women didn't work so they couldn't pay and both genders considered them to more delicate than men. Now, women have achieved income parity and insist on being equal to men in other ways too, EXCEPT in the dating world where they want to eat their cake and have it too (they want chivalry but also equality, whichever is beneficial to them at the time). Now someone please tell me why I should have to pay for a woman's meal when she earns the same or more, and is competing for the same promotion? It absolutely sickens me to be treated that way.
Happy hump day Courtney! Great information Courtney and to me, first impressions always count whether it's a date, or a job interview, etc. Make it count 🙏🏻
Hi John! ❤️
@@CourtneyRyan Hi Courtney! ❤
Lol it's not hump day, its leg day 💪
@@drip369 👍🏻
I’d like to add a couple, though these aren’t exclusive to girls and first dates, these can apply to any friendship or relationship. Smile and make them laugh. And when I said make them laugh I don’t mean be corny and start doing comedy routines. I mean just be generally humorous, if the personality suits you. Some people don’t have any humor in them whatsoever, and for them I wouldn’t force it as it would be awkward. But these are two qualities that from a psychological perspective, warm you up to someone on a subconscious level. People like being around others who smile, give off warm, positive charming vibes, and make them laugh. It makes them feel comfortable and at ease and you desire to be around people who make you feel happy being around them. Happiness and positivity rubs off!
About #4, I feel like women these days want guys who go out and get drunk and do drugs because they’re more social and fun and stuff like that. I personally am not super social. And I hate getting drunk. I never have and never will. I mean, I still want an attractive girl, but I shouldn’t have to potentially risk my life just to get one.
You shouldn’t want to be with a girl who wants that anyways if it doesn’t align with your values. I don’t drink either, I promise there are other girls who feel the same!
If you're with a girl and she says she needs a guy like that, be grateful. Because now you know to not waste your time on her anymore and find someone else.
I had this concern when I quite drinking a few years ago. Its honestly never been an issue though. I also realized that if a woman doesn't like me because I abstain from unhealthy things, then she is absolutely not someone I want to associate with.
There are plenty of really attractive women that admire guys that don’t drink or do drugs as long as they’re interesting. That’s the caveat. If you’re boring that’s the reason she’s not interested, it’s not the sobriety 😂
On my first dates , I’ve always told myself this
“What would James Bond do?” I got that tip from Corey Wayne. Being charming & mysterious has worked well for me.
It can. Bear in mind-- James Bond is a fictional character, so that will only take you so far. Find men who are successful with the type of relationship model you want to achieve, and emulate them. 👍
🔥
I guess it depends on which version of James Bond you’re talking about. Some of the older ones were pretty aggressive and handsy with every attractive woman they happened to come in contact with. They followed the philosophy of “50 no’s followed by a yes is still a yes”
this is spot on as always Courtney 🙂
as a man, I can't help but notice the nice vids have a bias towards catering to women. us guys look for stuff too. there was a clue about not berating the guy that opens the door for you. should the girl take the initiative with something like "let me get us the ride" or "I'll cover the bar tab before dinner," that is going to be huge. just showing up, even if pretty, is not enough. zero initiative means zero future dates by *my* choice. in fact, even the first date might not make it past the bar/appetizers should there be some entitlement attitude or no participation. the things girls do and expect don't have to be the same things that guys do and expect. I still sure do appreciate when the man's perspective is also included. "5 Things .. Turning People OFF!" is a good example 😎
It's worth noting there's a balance between 2 and 4. Insisting on the former can come across as insecurity in many conditions.
I have a relative who went on a date once. She happened to get to the restaurant door first and opened it for her date. His reply as she got near was to annoyingly complain "I'll get that!" in a whiny voice instead of thanking her for doing it.
Once he showed that side of him he ruined his chances and there was no further dates.
A good rule of thumb is to be chivalrous with a gal, but if she gets there first and tries to be polite to you, accept it to show security in yourself. If you're seriously looking for a relationship you'll need this anyway. It's a two way street.
Loving your content Courtney!
Been watching for a couple months now and your content has been so inspiring and refreshing in my journey to sharing a fulfilling life with a valuable good girl.
A great insight you made that a girl who denies chivalry and doesn’t allow you to pay for her ticket is a red flag makes a lot of sense now
Excellent video Court. Men, this is just old school 101 dating strategy. It is and will always be your responsibility to make sure the date is a success. Make plans, dress nice, good hygiene, good eye contact, be polite and thoughtful. Make the date completely about her. Ask thought provoking questions, shut up and listen. Add additional questions to her last response. Only supply personal information or anything about yourself if she asks. Make sure she feels safe, comfortable, and that your genuinely excited about her being there. Do nothing that even remotely suggests anything sexual. This is a key point she is looking for. The first date tends to be more of a interview for women. You are being evaluated for a possible relationship. Your being critiqued that entire night. Just have fun and let the date flow. This will make her feel comfortable. Pay for the damn meal ! If it goes well and she feels a connection. You may get another date. Remember, if she is a high value woman she has a truck load of options. Good Luck ! "Men display, Women choose"
You forgot to kiss her feet in the end .
Dafuk is this shit,it's not a job interview,it's a 2 sided communication.
If you do all this shit it's like you say " I'm 100% yours ,you don't have to bring nothing into the table ,now I have to make you like me "
No ,you test as well
If you want a conventional, long-term relationship with women, then Yes, this is the way to go.
Can you do a video on eyeglasses and/or sunglasses for men? For example I sometimes wear aviator sunglasses; but lately I've been getting comments that I look like a cop and very unapproachable. It's even worse when I wore a baseball cap with the aviators.
A girl I dated didn't like me being chivalrous. She is a feminist and used to say I don't need a guy doing things for me. She never said no when I used to pay for her though. She stopped dating me hope it was for the good.
It was. Women can be feminists and in favor of equality, while appreciating men who treat them respectfully.
If what she was saying, is that she prefers to be treated like crap, then you did the right thing-- you made space for a guy who can do that for her. Or, if she gets sick of dating the guys, she can chase women, and find out how the other half lives. 🙄
She don't need to man leads to her becoming the man she wants to marry crying why no one wants her and she'll end up miserable. It's sad. Feminazis surely spread lies and ruin lives.....that's why Courtney is a blessing to her male&female audience. She shows men what to look for and exemplifies what women should seek to "be"
Does doing chivalrous things mean anything to women? (Holding doors open, offering your jacket, standing when she leaves/arrives at the table when you're out for dinner, walking on the side closest to the traffic when you're walking on the sidewalk together {In case a car is out of control and jumps the curb, the man would be hit first.}, etc.). Or is that all old fashioned now?
Chivalry is a code amongst Knights of Yore - it meant that they would not run a civilian through with their knife, sword, lance, axe, arrow or bludgeon.
It was never about opening doors or pulling out seats.
I'm not sure about being direct... it depends on the situation and how far has the dating been going. If you are very straight forward on a first date that you are looking for something serious for example, you can come off as needy/desperate, and also women like mystery, if you take away the mystery from the beggining, it can kill the attraction.
As long as you leave to others the responsibility to make you happy, you will always be miserable, because that is actually your job? Linda Alfieri
It is high time I addressed something there's a narrative that men in general louse in life or are at disadvantage with regard to dating. So many things are wrong with that notion. Many problems we men face are also faced by women but in different ways. We all suffer from loneliness, heartbreak, lack of self-control and fear of humiliation. I think we should not base our whole existence on what genitalia we have rather try to be human for once! Don't get me wrong of course we are men, and of course, there are women but our gender identity is secondary and our individual identity is primary. For example, I was born male but when someone asks me who I am ii don't say that I am a MAAAN( neither would anyone with any sense) but I say I am Avid Hossan, a random guy on the internet. Your life is not about your gender, race, ethnicity or anything stupidly superficial like that it's about you, all of you!
Praying for Texas 🙏🏾
Thank you.
👊
Got it! Chivalry applies to Great Women! 👍
🙌🏼❤️
Hey Courtney! What is your opinion of whether or not a guy should pay for the first date? As a guy, I believe we should but many men (including myself) have been taken advantage of by women that are just looking for free drinks or a free meal.
If you're worried about that, then I would pre-screen her, before you even ask her out. You should have standards. That not only makes you more attractive, but also saves you time and money.
From there, do gradual escalations of time, resources, and commitment. Start with a coffee date, or one in a park. If she's the right woman, it won't matter as much. If she's the wrong woman (only after free meals and drinks), that should get rid of her quickly. Good luck! 😊
I’ve done a bunch of videos about this! Go check them out
You can do it for your Wife, Mom, Sister. However, in my sight, NO!!!.
You do not know how your so-called relationship are going to developing. If you are gonna doing tis with every woman always....., bankrupcy will come sooner or later. I do remember myself a couple of years ago when I refused to do this, She was shocked but after.....she began respecting and loving me afterwards.
So, keep in touch with your Dignity
avoid meeting them for a meal. I've come across waaay too many women who are only interested as long as I'm providing food and entertainment. Women have no problems saying no when they want to. Men should not feel bad about saying no either.
just aim for a low-cost 1st date (coffee, a walk in a park) instead of dinner in a restaurant (it's expensive and cringe). problem solved
Need your help with a watch purchase…..please pick one from your (not Teddy’s point of view).
#1) Rolex Yacht-Master blue dial
#2). Cartier Santos medium
Thanks much, Courtney! Always appreciate a woman’s perspective
Yachty for sure
I'm going on a first date tomorrow so this video was very timely. Thanks for the advice 😄
Yaay! :D
1. Effort (how much u put into first impresion, style...)
2. Be a gentleman.
3. Genuine interest (ask questions, don't look at other girls...)
4. Give a compliment (not sexualized)
5. Responsability, security (show on time, don't drink to much).
6. Good comunication skills.
Effort is a love language.. would this list apply to first meeting them? Not necessarily a date? I'm not a dating apps guy.
Yes first meeting them would be included too!
Loved the point about showing genuine interest; you explained it really well. Thanks!
Would love to see you do a video on out of all the tips you've ever given us , what Teddy succeeded in doing and not doing (green/red flags).
I love to sit down and listen to some wisdom from courtney cute voice 🥰
Thank you for your wisdom.
I am recently cut loose to date from 26 years of marriage. I don't know if flowers on 1st date is good. Its awkward to have flowers to deal with walking around having dinner.
I like the idea but i don't know of its a burden and old fashion in a bad way.
I do hope maybe one day I can meet Courtney ryan it whould be cool to talk to her i think she is so beautiful and always gives good advice thank you Courtney and the people who replied y'all be safe out there
You can do all this and a bad boy can still come in and ruin everything. You can do everything right and become a couple and a bad boy can still come and ruin everything
Love doesn’t exist in 2022. You are merely the current option while they wait for the better option to arrive.
Your quip about holding the door and being called a misogynistic was hilarious thank you for that.
Great video. Wish this channel first existed when I was in high school and college.
Great content, Its interesting hearing the female perspective. The only thing I disagree with is that a man should text you after the date. Since we have done all the Persuing through asking you out and setting up the date. To follow up with a text after the date communicates an over eagerness in my view. There's some psychology to this. If a woman is unsure of how the date was for you it makes her think about you non stop until she can't take the suspense anymore and sends you a nice text about how she had a great time (assuming she actually did). Its important to then communicate to her you also had a great time and then it's now a man's responsibility to take the lead and set up another date. Just drawing from my experiences. This approach has given me more success. This may be misconstrued as "game" but I think most women unwittingly play it a bit to determine any disqualifying criteria.
Seems to have gone better for me when I text something right after date, while we're still in the date energy.
On a great first date I had recently, I let her know I had a great time and would love to see her again and just paused for a couple of seconds. She actually took initiative and asked for my number, and texted me the same evening. Since I asked her out in the first place, I think we've both taken some initiative now, which feels like a pretty good sign
@@max8m1 Its different if you do it in person versus text. It can actually communicate strength and assertiveness if you do it face to face. So great job mate.
@@callumpistell1574 Thanks man, appreciate it. Over the last couple years I've grown a lot more confident in myself and happy with my life overall, and I think it truly helped my chances of finding a good partner. I'm not foolish enough to moon after a woman after the first date, but I do hope it continues to go well :)
@@max8m1 Yeah, you did good!
I would never be caught using my phone on a date, especially since even when I go shopping or I'm at work I always leave it behind (even though I know right now I am on my phone at work but it is in the cup holder and I always plan some free time at 11 a.m. Wednesdays and Fridays)
Totally fine with this list - as long as she is neither a promiscuous woman nor a single mother. There’s no way on Earth I’d ever (knowingly) put in so much effort for either.
This was a great list. Thank you.
What do I look for? Well, I definitely look for eye contact, posture, table manners, and listen for humility&manners just to make sure that first impression in-person matches consistently the more we hang out
These suggestions are fine if your interested in a traditional feminine woman. The problem is finding a traditional woman.
Women NEED to express interest as well by making a gesture or sending a text. The days of being old Fashioned are gone in this online world
"Chef's Kiss"
Had to look that one up. Nice.
Women wanting tall men is just an internet thing lol most women are with men of average height as you see in real life.
Superb comment. I feel most of the culture wars and all the hatred is really an online thing. Reality is very different from the online mania.
Miss Courtney Ryan I always try to be the best version of myself wearing my suit and tie.
Courtney, you and your content! ❤️
Thank you! ❤️
Welcome courtney
First here
On first date video 🤣
Your Tips always work
😎
separated 1 year ago, back trying to date at the age of 50.. showed all that in a lot of 1st dates.. not going anywhere.. I am a bjj athlete, fit, job stable, etc.. no luck whatsoever.. Toronto is a terrible city for dating.. your videos are great btw!
Thank you Courtney for great advice.
Great advice.
Something I will usually do especially when going out with with woman at night is to ask if they would like me to walk them to their car or wait with them if they Uber. It's a small touch but I want to make sure they are safe before I go.
Good to know. Also 1st
I have never dated. The woman who later became my wife was in my tent three days after we had met. I kicked her out. She had to wait three years until I finally said YES. It was probably a mistake, but we had been happily married for 32 years until she died. I hope sharing my experience with women will help someone. Cheers!
A very deep informative not shallow at all
This really helps
Recap:
1. Is his name Justin?
2. Does he follow Courtney Ryan?
3. Does he make comments on RUclips videos?
4. Is he good at making lists?
5. I can’t think of a fifth right now
You’re welcome, everybody
😂🙌🏼
Being older. Not have dated in years. Id give myself a Cee. My follow through was very clumsy. But I'll learn.
Alcohol literally ruined my entire life!😩 Although I'm from Northern Ireland and _everyone_ drinks, especially on dates. Most girls I know can drink American men under the table.
You're right on the money on everything you said Courtney Ryan thumbs up 👍 love the video
Girl I’m interested in at work was flirting with me saying my cologne is intoxicating, acting shy around me, smiley all the time etc last night she said something about her doing a strip tease and “maybe ull get to see it one day” so I asked her out on the spot. (Keep in mind I’ve only had 1 legitimate convo with her and a couple back and fourth one liners, also never validate or compliment her and keep it short, and ignore her 90% of the time) She said maybe, and I laughed and said I don’t do maybes. She then said well she has a boyfriend right now but she’s working on leaving him because she’s unhappy. I just said o okay and kept it moving. She was cheesing hard after I walked away.She then came around later to tell me she felt she didn’t word that right (she made it sound like she didnt mean it to sound like a no?) she wasn’t expecting me to ask her out and her heart was pounding but she told me that she would love to hang out but she’s not the type to cheat or something . I just said okay we’ll take my number. She then said her bf goes through her phone but she has ig. I said nah I don’t do ig. ( she only has like 70 followers so idk if she’s one of those types)shes not the baddie type. seems like a nice unexperienced girl. she didn’t seem weirded out. I just said I understand and told her to have a good night. Now today we haven’t spoken at all, but she was talking to all the beta simps that giv her attention. I plan on just giving her space and waiting for her to reach out to me. What you guys think? I don’t think she would of told me she is trying to leave her boyfriend if she wasn’t a little interested nah?
Sounds like she's a tease that just craves attention. She switched from you to the Beta Simps when things got too real for her when you asked her out. Also, gotta say it, She's not being that much of a "nice girl" if she's flirting with everyone when she's got a BF (or says she has), don't put this girl on a pedestal.
Honestly your plan is right though, just give her space and wait for her to reach out. I doubt she will and in any case, dating a girl at work isn't a great move anyway.
@@jleano609 things actually going good but I’m still keeping my distance when I can and not gonna let my guard all the way down
I need to work on #5.
Maybe don’t comment on her smell if you don’t know her that well 😂
More of a second date compliment
This is a make or break like a job interview. Act interested when she talks to you. Eye contact is very important. Stay off your phone. Add some humor. We love that.
🙌🏼❤️
You look so classy and simple 😍 . All you videos look amazing and your voice tone its so....glamorous🙂
For me the main cause of not connecting with people, be it dating or friendship, was lack of genuine interest in people.
I found out about my resentment towards people, pessimistic (and not realistic btw) worldview, personal fears, traumas and lack of knowledge and competence in human relationships, lack of insight about myself (WHAT do I do and WHY, what do I WANT. Knowing correct answer to these questions requires honesty with yourself, ability of critical thinking). There is no shortcuts - you are who you are, there is no way of pretending to be they way you actually don't feel without harming at least one person out of two.
You are strong, capable and attractive. The problem is not lack of value. It may be just not enough maturity: lack of knowledge about yourself and people, lack of competence in social skills and self regulation skills, lack of ability to set and achieve your goals in systematic way with critical thinking.
One step at the time. Use your mind to find the best ways of achieving something, don't dive into the endless sea of abstract ideas, it is useful instrument, but without acting and analyzing results of your actions you will be overwhelmed with thoughts while standing in the same place in life.
Ask yourself what is the matter of the situation, find the problem/set goal, find multiple ways of achieving desired goal, choose the best solution and apply it, analyze the result. Repeat.
In order to solve a problem, you must first identify it correctly. And this requires honesty with oneself, critical and logical thinking, a sufficient understanding of the subject.
And remember to have enough rest! Take care!
Very good comment. I need this, I want to have relationships with direction and purpose. Sometimes I lost interest because of improper planning and having no genuine purpose for the relationship. Especially where I thought the person is not attractive enough I would say "well I will not go for long term anyway so what's the point of putting more effort"
@@wisecounsel6135 genuine interest and good feelings seem to me as a good enough purpose!
Random question but do you ever feel that we have all this advice for what men should do but never look at what women are not doing?? I think men should always put their best foot forward no matter what, and dating is suppose to be hard. If dating wasn't hard people would never leave the market. But i think we a promoting men to be gentlemen, but what does that say about women out there? Are they not dating gentlemen? are gentlemen not attractive to women for them to give them a chance? I can say from experience and from asking women, a lot of women have low standards for men (they have been with) but are promoting the opposite. I mean just look at all the single moms and what not. I hope men and women keep striving to be the best because that what we are meant to be and nothing less.
The great women have already gotten the memo. The other women, well... it's a buyer's market for them. Life isn't fair, but their attitudes do change at about 40 or so, due to necessity. They hit the Wall, and if they don't have a guy at that point, the pickings start to get slim.
If women expect men to be gentlemen, then it is only fair for men to expect women to be proper ladies.
Hey Courtney! I love your channel and all the tips you give us fellas out there 😊 Keep it up as I always enjoy seeing a new video! One small thing I noticed when the words "communication skills" came up is that communication is spelt incorrectly. No biggie! I'll be sure to add these 5 tips to my list to remember 😄
Great video as always, the two-tone sweater not so much
Great video, thank you Courtney, you are a real sweetheart. I appreciate what you do.
Yr a class act Courtney yr Intel is articulate and precise ..good work
320k! Getting closer to that 2M! 🎖
I agree with questions; and making it reciprocal, that s why I always found useful the I ask you answer then switch roles back and forth about passions, fav things to do, wathever, you can also use this as an escalation method. Don’t neglect kino (when appropiate) too, to escalate physical contact (also as a way to test, her responsiveness to you lightly casually touching her, maybe side ways just a rub of the arms, shoulder, etc) and also what is being talked about being more funny and sexual (in a progressive way to not come up as creepy at first) you don’t want to talk about her looks, maybe something more like hey I like your shirt so much, looks lovely on you. Instead of damn girl ya hot. (Yeah me and how many other girls? , then you loose the is he going to be secure to me if I choose him, no one likes to be cheated, yet they like competition, so being preselected is accepted, it’s more of a future kind of thing they don’t want the prince to be a beast after, but the beast to become their king) I’m also thinking about how well cream and Black combines, I saw the 75 suit combination out of 5 and those 2 are some with navy blue white and that other lighter blue… and keep linking conversations to escalate and have a multidate. You can just have coffee. Or you can have a coffe and say hey you mind coming for some milk I need to buy my mother? So you have made multiple memories stored on her to afterwards think about.
Being a gentleman or educated should be priority for everyone in general, you want to treat others well. Also adds conversation too, oh let me walk in this side of the road is about chivalry you knew why this was? If a car comes crashing into us I can stop it with my superpowers (playfulness) well not really although I’m strong! Works better if you are actually not that strong, but this comes from ancient times to protect when carriages came by so you didn’t get muddy protected by the man; also you feel more protected this way having man and wall to avoid purse steals etc.. this add story, interesting facts, you caring about her. Brownie points to cash in later when having more connection styles of interpersonal… sex, I mean sex. But it’s not all about just sex. It’s about being compatible, secure, able to have fun together, and enjoy sex to the fullest.
Oh wow we just talked about the same thing hehe you go girl! It’s basic stuff really so sad some people don’t get to know this, so I’m very happy to see channels like this that help others, good job!
Yeah texting after is super important. I really enjoyed our time together. Looking forward to meet you again. Then after, you have demonstrated interest and now it’s ok to make her miss you a bit
Oh that feeling of connecting with someone is so nice, maybe that’s why I’m a bit astrofetichist (I like finding compatible people a lot, and I use the astrology medium for it) I don’t know if this even exists, I just invented it to understand my own feelings.
Have a nice day I’ll keep watching your interesting channel and giving you feedback.
In business is important that a leader has a elevator methodology (saying to have proper feedback from workers etc) a chain is as strong as it’s weakest link, and sometimes who really know the product are not the ceos but the mere workers installing it knowing customers what fails etc etc so that’s why I like to give my feedback and fills my ego a bit too.
So sorry if I’m intense, I’m just really excited about the conversations and info sparked from your content. It’s amazing to me. I lost my friends when little and had to learn to seduce to not be alone. So I like this a bit.
Great video Courtney !! Such great tips and advice !💗💗💗💗
I have at least 10 different suits with added waistcoats and accessories to be the best version of myself.
You have impeccable fashion sense.
Hey Courtney every time I try to make the first impression & walk up & approach to a Girl that
I like all they do is just walk away from me.
Why does that happen to me every time ?
It happens sometimes. Same thing happened to me when I did street interviews 😂
@@CourtneyRyan Ok but it has been going for me for a long time ever since I was in the 7th Grade in Middle School until now still in College but I gotta ask Y.R. Beautiful California Dime Girls so DANE Judgey all the time to us nice guys
@Ante Petrish try approaching women with a friendly view and get advice. Ask them what can you do better and what you can work on when approaching women. Women love helping men, most men do not have the confidence to do it. Furthermore, it allows a women to be brutally honest knowing that she is helping you. Do it with many people around so she feels safe (places where women frequent, coffee shops, gym, etc). Build your confidence and figure your best optimal approach. Trial and error works but you have to view it from a womens' point of view, they do not know you nor do they know what you want from them. Example: never approach a woman from behind or without a genuine charismatic aura.
@@GJones247 Ok then I'll try doing that if it works that is of course ahah
Congratulations on the pregnancy 👏 countney you're make a great momma 🥰🤗
I’m not pregnant…. Lol
@@CourtneyRyan
Wait, this has got to be some sort of pick-up line.
"...Congratulations on the pregnancy..."
"...I’m not pregnant..."
"... well, the night is still young..."
I'm so sorry, I'll get my coat.
@@lastwhitemanalive7177 guys, guys! Do not do this......she(all women) may press charges
Women want chivalry but put zero effort in themselves these days. Maybe if they start to treat us better all these things like chivalry will come back. Men are generally now putting in exactly what we are getting back which isnt much at all.
It’s a two way street for sure!
@Tony Sayers. So true, brother. Women were prettier, more ladylike and worthy of respect back in the "Old days", ('70's and '80's). No 300 lb. women with tattoos and body piercings back then.
@@paulgiarmo3628 True, in the 70's and 80's most women were slim and attractive, not these lumbering hippos that you see now.
And if you guys are creative like me and can plan a date where you can show off some competency skills, that will also go far for you
Always smart to have a plan. But also, be spontaneous occasionally. Keeping a woman guessing somewhat is good to keep things fresh and exciting. 👍
Courtney! Off topic but leather slides, brown driving mocs or espadrilles for by the pool!?
I wish courteney was my girlfriend but she is already in a relationship it sucks but I hope the guy she is with treats her right makes her feel special etc
If she gets mad at me for being a gentleman. The date ends...immediately.
Nr 1 is a strange point. For most men it is extremely difficult to get a date. Many have to invest dozens to hundreds of hours for a date. How much effort do you expect? The whole lifetime for a single date?
Hundreds? Dude you're picking the wrong women. Choose girls who choose you. Invest in those whom invest in you. Sounds like you need some social-proof on your side
@@drip369 not hundreds of hours for one woman of course.
That's all time added together from one date to the next. I've never met a woman who chose me. This choice does not exist for me.
Effort and attraction goes together. No attraction no effort. What a shocker.
Courtney - Are great women (with values and looks like you ... tbh) still around at age 30-40? Or are they already gone by that point? Are they on dating apps, or are the great ones mainly found the old-fashioned way of real life interaction?
You are a great women Courtney, when is the next RUclips live stream? Next month? 😊
Hoping to do it soon! I’ve been so busy 😂
@@CourtneyRyan soon is good 😊
Being on time is about how one manages their own time AND about being courteous and respecting another's (not just a date's) time. Furthermore, if he/she has a clock on the date, then YOU just wasted date time.
I have a question for Courtney what if the girl I'm on a date with wants to have sex and I'm not quite ready and she gets mad at me what should I do
Great question. Nothing wrong with taking it slow but also keep in mind… are your values aligned with hers?
@@CourtneyRyan I've never had sex before I do want to take it slow get to know the girl I'm on a date with thank you for responding
4:43 - 2 drinks Courtney ?? That almost seems a bit restrained .. If I'm going out to have drinks with a girl, I want us both to have a good time .. Not like it has to be St. Patty's Day but just ya know casual drinking .. Just go with the flow : ) Especially if your maybe dancing or playing pool or shooting darts or something ..
Big factor is the type of drink it might be AND how long you are at the bar and if you are going to different places throughout the night .. If you're both drinking Long Island Iced Teas then yes 2 or 3 is plenty for each of you lol !!! But no chance I'm having 2 Bud Lights for the entire night if I got all prepped and shaved etc and to go out on a date with a girl.
Some bars are so bad with the mixed drinks. They do the small plastic cups load it with ice and hardly any booze and both guys and gals can easily drink them quickly .. Especially if you are out dancing at a nice club or something
Can you imagine as a guy waiting in line to get into a club/bar with a girl and saying, "Listen, we are both at a 2 drink maximum tonite." That's lame lol .. Heck she might even skip out of line with you thinking you are broke and don't have money lol ..
All guys are trying to impress and show up to her on a 1st date but Geesh I'd also like to enjoy my time out too !!! I worked all week as well .. Don't have to get drunk or sloppy. I think all of us that are responsible know when enough is enough and as someone that can handle themselves 2 drinks is just warm up time if you ask me ; ) If I'm actually going out especially in this day and age I'm having more than 2 ..