MY MAN IS MAKING ME WAIT TWO MORE YEARS TO MARRY ME | Hijabi Talks PT.2 | Aysha Harun
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- Опубликовано: 24 ноя 2022
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FAQ
Where do you live? - Los Angeles, CA
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Age? - 27
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Хобби
No, don't wait 2 years. I did that and that marriage never happened. Keep your options open. Let him go 2 years and tell him connect you in 2 years and see if you still single, but don't wait.
Wisdom
But wait seriously where u going to do dat ? Pls dont u might break if something happened which we are not praying for
Am really not thinking u waiting for 2 years is a good idea
I’d stay with him and keep your options open ( it may be hard to disconnect from him ).. because it takes time to build relationship so it might even take you 2 or more to forge relationships .. so stay with him but reorient your life to meet new people ,
🤭. I’m 47 so it comes with experience 🤭.
Agree, I was with someone who was dragging the situation someone else came who wanted to married me who was even better in all aspects and I did and have been married for almost 24 years 😊
I love the approach of the 3rd hijabi with grey hijab she really listens to the question and everyone’s perspectives before she answers and then when she does it’s well thought out and logical MashAllah 🥰
Same here 🤗
Making money is an action. Keeping money is behavior. Growing money is knowledge.😊
I am Gen X and was raised Muslim, the only role models were our parents and women from the Islamic community. I think its so awesome to see Muslim women in positive TV roles, in magazines on the runway and Islamic clothing so easily available. It's so important to have representation of all brown shades. Thank you Aysha for your strength and vulnerability and to stay firm in your beliefs. #respect! ❤️
I wouldn't wait. Ya'll overcomplicate things. Just do the Nikkah ceremony and put off the financial burden of a wedding. He can either secure the bag or move on. As a girl we don't have the luxury of time like men do. As the saying goes...if he wanted to he would.
What if they want a big wedding and the man doesn't have the money for that celebration yet
@@zua240 that is a materialistic way of looking at things. You have to set your priorities straight. You can always do the Islamic marriage and do the celebration 1-2 years later that’s what Amanda Asad did you can look up her YT channel. I don’t understand why people put their marriage on hold for one big day. It makes everything harder than it needs to be. I’m 24 and if I vetted someone and knew that I wanted to marry them I’m not going to wait till I’m 26 that’s ridiculous. I’m not saying that he shouldn’t have money because we need that security but if a big wedding is the only obstacle I personally don’t think it’s worth it.
@@Kawaii_Imani I do think you should get legally married before if you want to prospone the wedding that fine but a man who does not want to legally marry you is a huge red flag. I also think waiting 1-2 years for a wedding is a long time wow maybe a couple months if you have to wait that long maybe there should be things needed to change.
Screaaminnnggg!! I love the coziness of it all! ❤
Good evening ladies. Love that talk.
No human can fully know another human being. We do not even know ourselves fully. We have a general idea of who we are but human changes daily with each experience. We just hope to change for the better.
I love how cozy they look 😍 💕 the couch 🛋 and the blankets 😍
I grew up in an area where being Black and Muslim wasn’t foreign but there was the assumption that if you were Black and Muslim, then you were a member of the NOI. The NOI were very active in my town, especially when I was a kid. My perspective as an Eritrean was a lot more broad. Also, with regard to identity, I think Gen Z has far more resources they can tap into and mentors they can look to and their understanding of intersectionality is definitely deeper than generations past.
this set up looks so so cozy omg
this was really fun guys! thanks Aisha !
I literally just finished watching your New York video yay. Also Jumma Mubarak everyone
Oh my God... oh my goooddd.. I love this so much 🥰🥰🥰 thank you so much aysha I needed thissssaahh
I’m a Christian, & our dating is pretty similar!
I dated my husband for 4 months before we were engaged, & then 6 months after that we got married. I think 8-18months is a great time frame for know for sure if you want to get married. I feel like most men know in 6 months of dating honestly lol.
& yes, we waited to have sex until after we were married. 🙌🏿✨💍🙏🏿♥️
Yes! I would argue that men oftentimes know even sooner! Congratulations to you 🎉❤✨
@@fatimah230 thank you! To God be the glory for writing our love story! 🙌🏿✨🙏🏿
Honey you were engaged after 4 months?!? 😳 Say jokesss
Teach me how 😭😭😭
@@billybobisnotavailable a man of God will only bring clarity, not confusion to your life. 🙏🏿💚
He knew what he wanted & what he was looking for, & when everything aligned - we both prayed, daughter godly advice and wisdom from others, & then we moved forward. My husband truly has a servants heart. We both entered this journey thinking about what we can give to each other. Not what can we get. & God has truly blessed us. I pray all women who desire marriage have a healthy & secure partnership! 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿♥️♥️♥️
I enjoyed this so much
Definitely want to see more
Aysha...I like how you respond...because you really know what you want and you will not let someone make you think two ways about it. There is nothing as beautiful and powerful as a woman who is certain about herself, what she wants, and what her priorities and goals are in life - You are intentional and have a direction for your life. You have no time to waste or be distracted! You have truly come of age and I am so proud of you! Keep soaring higher and into being all that God made and wants you to be! That is the best thing ever, IN THIS LIFE!
We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.
Maya Angelou
Love this !!!! Would love to see more
You’re black and Muslim 😂. I got that a lot when I was leaving in Malaysia. In Nigeria 100M black people are Muslims, not to mention the rest of Africa. We’ve definitely learned a lot from each other thanks to the internet.
I agree, Keep your options open !
Brutally honest talk !
❤ aww I missed your intro🥰 very soothing
Hi Aysha 🎉 haven't watched your vlogs in a while, i hope you're good I'm glad I'm back
Sara the not being accepted as black and having an identity crisis is every east African Muslim girls life story in our generation- I'm Somali living in the UK and literally I would have kids from the Caribbean tell me im not black beacuse I'm Somali and I would have my Pakistani and Arab friends tell me I'm not black because I'm muslim- so Aisha I 100 understand you saying people didn't know Muslims could be black and this is Muslims speaking to me. I remember telling my dad this and he told me to say to my Pakistani friends that Islam came to us ( East Africa ) when their ancestors where still Hindus - it felt like a mic drop moment. My father passed away during COVID so could you please make dua for him.
lol exactly
SubhanAllah, Your abbo sounded like an amazing man. May Allah grant him Jannahtal Firdose and reunite you with him!! May Allah illuminate his grave and forgive him! Ameen 🤍
May Allah swt grant your father the highest place in Jannah.. Ameen.
What you wrote about what you father told you to say to Pakistanis is actually quite terrible and I think you should remove your comment for his sake.
I'm a British Pakistani and I'm deeply offended by what you wrote! Who do you think the Sahabas were before accepting Islam? Literally Islam came at a time when most people (which is written in the holy Qur'an) were pagan worshippers and so were the sahabas!
There is a possibility your ancestors could have been pagan worshippers not much different to hindus. Infact if you ever read the history of India you would of known that
Persian people were one of the major ethnic groups, who accompanied the ethnic Turco-Mongol ruling elite of the Mughal Empire after its invasion of the Indian subcontinent and Afghanistan and thats how many muslims not only came to India but converted to islam.
I think it's awful you would think that's a "mic drop moment" as mocking is certainly not the way in islam. Would you mock the sahabas for their past or faith they were born into?
@@AJ-il1lm8ph7z thank you for the dua for my father it's genuinely appreciated ....but I'm not going to remove my comment...the comment is not to Mock South Asians at all but historical FACTS. Islam same to east African during the first migration of the prophets companions. We were Muslims long before Islam came to South Asia or even Persia. If you find historical facts mocking...I'm not really sure how to comfort you...Allah love you 😘
@@AJ-il1lm8ph7z I think she is not mocking them. Back then brown muslim maybe didn't acknowledge her being muslim and black. And her father (rahimahulah) reminded her that the first hijra of the sahabas was to the horn of Africa. So there are black muslim since the almost the beginning of Islam. But there are out there people who will belittle or didn't acknowledge that we are muslim (even now ) and that's worse if the women doesn't wear a hijab.
I could listen to Nabat speak all day. She’s so well spoken, Masha Allah
Salam, loved the collaboration. Loved the honesty of your views as well as the diversity in opinion. May Allah bless you all 😊
Girl are you wearing the dress by With love Leena, The Drop collection? Orange looks really good on you!!
Super excited and wonderful video❤❤❤❤❤❤
I love this. I'm not Muslim and couldn't follow everything. So I did some research and feel like I have a better grasp. But, I thought you had a video where you sort of explained dating and marriage. Can you tag it?
I just love your vlogs ayshaharun 💯
Your vlogs are the best!!!!!!🎉💯❤️
I have never heard the black Muslim vs a brown Muslim thing. But I have been told so many times even until this day "can't you just take the pepperoni off the pizza". Lucky now in my part of Western NY, there's a lot of pizza places that have beef pepperoni.
All my faves ❤❤❤
I love watching your vlogs❤️❤️❤️❤️
hijabi from france here 🙋♀️ i love the concept!
oooh we love a girl talk AND YOU BETTER NOT QUIT ON US OR ELSE WE FIGHTING SIS LOOL JUMAA MUBAREK GUYS
I RAAAANNNNN HERE!!!
I love the video guys and I'm really into the content. You guys have a lot of great conversations.and cool discussions. I'm going to keep watching. 😎🤓😝😜
I want to learn more about the Islamic faith. Where should I start? Love your channel by the way! Just subscribed!
Look for mufti Menk
This was amazing
FINALLYYYYY. 🤗🤗🤗🤗
I love your content beautiful
Asalamualaikum Sis 😘❤️ The title! 😆
2 years Nope! You can fall into sin that way. Plus you could be sacrificing your fertility.
About waiting, ur right. I waited 17 years and no proposal but I know now he was using me 4 a visa
My favorite ❤❤❤❤
My favorite ❤️❤️❤️
Never clicked on a video so fast 😘😘
Hi Aysha, Asalam Aleikum 🥰🥰🥰🥰
This is scary...2 yrs... No girl shoul be put in zat position to wait for her man...
Salam Alaykum!
I do love the representation, its so nice seeing black Muslim women in an online space.
I would just say to be very cautious about the advice/comments made especially geared towards other young Muslim women. You guys said yourselves that people like Aysha serve as a role model to other Muslim women, especially those that are young & wear hijab so hearing some of the advices/comments shared were a bit concerning.
Allahu 'alam, I'm truly commenting just as a benefit to you all & hoping it is not something that may count against you with Allah swt.
My honest advice to sisters who are thinking about getting married to any potential man who she thinks he is the one. 2 years or more is too much for getting to know each other and it’s a waste of time and energy to put in a relationship like this. According to studies, the average amount of time of getting to know someone before engagement should a period of 6 months to 1 year. Once when you guys made it to the engagement, it should last for a period of 4 to 6 months, or a year,if possible, determining if you guys will make it to the marriage. If a man wants to marry you within 2 years or more, then sis walk away cuz he is not the one for you and he will twist and turn the relationship. If he want to get to know to you, you must ask him if he is willing to come over to her house to get permission from her parents before and he say to you “ I am not ready” or “I need more time to think about”, then walk away. Asking critical questions is important for him to give you the answer to see if he is the the right one for you.
At the end of the day, any man who is serious about choosing you to marry and gets permission from your parents, will be the real one. Please do not waste your alls time and energy into these things and it’s not going to be worth it😤. I’ll pray for you all to find the the man that you deserve.
My favourite 😍 ❤️ 💕 ♥️ 💛
Masha Allah, Muslim woman❤
Asalamu Alaikum! the thing abt Muslim dating apps is quite contradictory since dating is haram. Obviously, there's boundaries in Islam to make it halal but i think we should avoid them all together 😁
Where would he live if not at home?
The Pashmina era 🤣♥️♥️♥️♥️
Biiiiiiiiig single till married energy
Alhamduillah I'm planning to wait two years or more to get married Inshallah
I love you ♥️♥️♥️
A man that doesn’t live at home HAHA 😂
20:50 people do change 🙄 even if you are living with each other
❤❤❤
This is so interesting🥰🫶🙏🏽💖
TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHERE TO START...WELL FIRST, I'M 55! I WATCH AYSHA FOR HER CONTENT. BUT ALL I REALIZED FROM HER AND HER DIVORCE REMINDED ME OF MY YOUNG MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE. EVEN MORE THE SEVERE DISCONNECT WITH MUSLIMS TRADITIONS AND HOW CERTAIN BLACK AND WHITES DO LIFE/LIVING! SO MUCH OF HOW PEOPLE DO ONE ANOTHER.... I'LL NOT FULLY UNDERSTANDING! BECAUSE OUTSIDE OF LOVE (ANYWAY) WHAT DOES IT MATTER (NOT SPEAKING LIFE INTO ONE ANOTHER IS ITS OPPOSITE).... GOD/ALLAH IS MORE THAN WE "WILL" AND COULD EVER IMAGINE, THINK, OR BELIEVE... FOREVER ❤️✌️🕊️🌹
Where’s your dress from …. The one in the into video 😍😍😍
Winning a draw??
I won't rush anything and I think what she wants is defiantly important.. so I would wait if she wanted us to. If there was no reason to I wouldnt. I would ask her as soon as I'm able to.
2 years is such a long time, even for a non-muslim. If you know yourself and what you want, why wait for two years? It truly shows that the person does not really care about you and does not have an understanding of who they are. It's better to end things so that you can be found by the person who is ready to go to the next level.
I met my husband on muzmatch too 😅
I am Fijian-Indian. People are confused that I am Muslim that looks like South Indian. Growing up people thinks Muslims are not from India.
Yes to a man living alone after age 25. A must have in the western world
I still get asked "how are you muslim and black?"
Please come my Qatar.
Your mom’s was a good answer the best role model you can ask for . I feel we need to teach our kids about Aisha r.a Khadijah R.a Sumayyah RA so these women should
Be our role model.
💜💜💜💜💯
I’m not gonna lie I did enjoy this but I literally feels like every answer never even mentioned their deen or Islam which is lowkey worrying cuz why have we normalized dating and literally haram stuff like this is a Muslim talk but why is Islam not even a big part of this convo
The part where you spoke on the pizza seems so miniscule to most but it really isn't!!! Speaking from experience...almost all races including our own to find it impssoible to believe out we were born Muslim. People automatically assume based on race the default religion has to be Christianity.
You can get your nikkah done on the phone
I definitely I’ll marry you in two years somebody😂😂😂😂 I wanted to finish school then work for a year before
I’m with Aysha. What do you mean you never had to take care of your own place?
But this is hijabs talks 😂😂😂
brown scarf seems very odd
what are their guy cousins talking about lol? If your muslim and your not ready to be married don't talk to anyone leave women alone. If he is stringing you along leave him immediately. It will just lead to haram unnecessary relationships and a lot of emotion turmoil. 'struggle years' and testing the relationship...lol I'm dead.
Am I the only one who doesn't understand the muslim dating thing? Literally this is misguiding the ummah! There is no such thing as "Muslim dating".Free mixing with the opposite gender is prohibited in islam and thats it! You can meet through family, friends or through modern day matrimony services but you have to be accompanied with a mahram and you can not go on dates or be friends and let's be honest there no way someone who's been dating for so long has never crossed the red lines of Islam even of that means flirting. Please muslimahs do not follow their advice.
So how does colorism work in you community does that exist like favoritism of lighter skin women do your men prefer lighter skin over darker?
.
Also Ayesha was your ex intentional in perusing you also I feel like you always have your guard up when your talking about your ex marriage you need to speak in it .
Wow, looking crazy with those huge microphones in this age of technology !!!!!
People look just fine with whatever they choose to use to get their point across in any age. Obviously, the conversation should be the focus here.
The only thing “looking crazy” is your weird focus on tangible objects…🥴
@@Khadijah_time Still looking crazy lol:)))
@@Khadijah_time Not to mention the piles and piles of blankets, aesthetics matter.
@@sharonaustin4025 Yup! You’re STILL “looking crazy” 👀🥴
@@Khadijah_time Still a hot mess, and yes the microphones and everyone wrapped in bulky grey blankets still look crazy.
its called vetting. just like you vetted him for sex he's vetting you for marriage. the day after your marriage 2 years from now will be no different than today. so whats the rush? its funny how men can't feel entitled to sex & has to wait for it, but women feel entitled to commitment & won't wait for it. funny how that double-standard works.
Dang Ayesha was being so disrespectful and full of herself in this video lol she thinks just cuz she makes the most money her opinion matters the most lmfao
No she is just speaking from experience! Because once you experience a marriage and a divorce your opinions are a hundred percent different than someone that has never been married. I’m speaking from experience.
Projecting much ?! I think she wanted to say more that was opposing the general view of the majority but she refrain herself from talking too much and she was letting the other people's opinions shine. She has the most experience among them, I would have loved to hear more from her
How was she disrespectful? I didn't see that, most of the time she made it clear it was her opinion, I think you are just hating on Aysha 🤔
If your ready for marriage and truly want to complete half your deen it won’t take 2 years to figure out if you want to marry someone or not. If they don’t see your worth after a few months and have some sort of plan/suggests meeting the family etc then leave your in a situationship.
2 years is too long and to wait another 2 years after 🥴🥴🫠
There may be more people visible with some sort of hijab on, but we had a much better representation of the correct hijab. The longer we’ve been in the west, the lighter our hijabs have become and the tighter our clothing has become.
Good point!
Ma'sha'Allah, Exactly!! On point👍
I meant my husband on muzmatch. I recommended it to a friend who found her husband there as well.