He Smashed ANOTHER TV...
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- Опубликовано: 27 авг 2024
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We're now up to 3 smashed TVs since we moved house last year. We need a new plan...
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I'm a 38 year old RUclipsr from the UK. I've got a cracking beard and I'm currently going through the autism diagnosis process. I started this channel back in 2017 and by the time I left my full-time job as a Computer Science teacher in July of that year, my partner Anna was trapped in our house by our son Andy, who is autistic and had refused to go to school for 18 months. Our daughters Lucy and Amy and our dog Dave hardly saw me because I was always working to try and solve all our problems! Today I'm a full-time content creator and always at home when the kids get home from school (all our kids!) and Anna has been able to return to university. This channel is the story of my ongoing journey! Previously known as lollujo Vlogs and The Chapman Family.
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#Autism #SmashedTV #Parents
awww, Anna looks like she is going to cry. :( HUgs.
😭🫂
This comment is just for Anna, from mom to mom I know how hard this is we have replaced xboxes, tv, and tablets so many times and its so frustrating. I often feel like its my fault when my son breaks things. I hope you know you are an awesome mom and I respect the heck out of ya for how you handle trying behaviors. I hope things get better and looking forward to catching you on stream at some point!
My friend has a son that dose this an now she is not replacing things he breaks .to teach him you can’t get another one just because you threw a fit an smash yiur tv iPad he has autism to he gets new things later on
Anna needs a hug, and I'm sending a big one!
I can understand why Anna is so grumpy and fed up its totally understandable and a valid response. Id be exactly the same. I think you have a point Kevin. The internet not working properly made Andy think it was the tv that was broken because when he smashed the others a new 1 arrived and the problem was fixed so it seemed like the tv was the problem to him. I really hope you all have a better rest of the week.
You guys got this. Anna you’re so strong. Amazing woman. I’ve been a behavioral therapist working with autistic kids. I understand to some degree.
This is not meant in a bad manner:
I have experience in dealing with Autism [I have an autistic brother] I would recommend making Andy wait longer than a month for new TV, [maybe 2 or 3] Clearly Andy is very clever and has "logically" figured out that you will both "give in" as you said he doesnt "rely" on the Tv anymore so for your own sanity I would advise not replacing it so quickly.
again this is meant in the nicest possible way, im not trying to be nasty, Im trying to make a suggestion
Hope Anna is OK, she's clearly feeling for Andy emtionally while dealing with the simultainious parental frustration.
Indeed.🫂
Staying calm in this situation is so hard I think Anna being grumpy is absolutely fine 😂
My heart goes out to Anna she just looks so deflated, but this is their true life...
@@williamkelly5689 meaning?
@@JulieSmart69 I wasn’t hating, someone had left a hate comment but had deleted it after I commented back to them 🙄
Blimey, I had no idea that's what a TV looked like under the screen.
I didn't know you could peel of the LCD screen.
@@ObviouslyKieran same
Not all TVs are like this. A led TV or oled wont have this. If this isnt a broken screen the film is what makes our eyes see also prob a flaw with the TV as Bush isnt the best make also but for him its ok
@@michaelwebster6219 That's why I said LCD screen...
Totally learnt behaviour. He’s a smart cookie and like you said worked out that he can get a new telly by breaking it.
Good on you not letting him have a new telly straight away! This should get rid of the learnt behaviour. You guys are doing amazing
I agree with you Kev don't replace the TV. Certainly feels like learned behaviour that a smashed telly = New One
That is spot on he has got that in his head
Also about a TV cabarnet make 1 it isnt that hard also 800 is not much if it's going to work you cant really say it wont work when u dont know. Make a frame out of MDF to sit the TV in and the thick plastic perspex over it you can do that for 100 or so but make it so u know he wont break it
I couldn’t imagine how difficult it would be to manage Andy’s behavior and not get frustrated. But you’ll manage, as you always do in the end! Stay positive 🤘🏻
Honestly, well done to you for not giving in this time and NOT replacing the TV as that would be rewarding him, plus, as you mentioned, before, you are not made of money. My mother would have done the same to me, as well as ground me for at least 3 months and make me pay off the damage. I think from a young age, I was taught that this wasn't acceptable (which may or may not have contributed to me overly apologizing for accidently breaking stuff and then offering to replace it.). I would also like to congratulate you in admitting that it was yours and Anna's fault for giving in to him in the first place every time he did it and that circumstances meant he was effectively babysat by technology which is possibly why he is like he is now. Not a lot of parents in the situation can admit that. I do 100% agree (and this goes to Anna especially) that it is high time to get strict now.
I personally think Andy needs other non-tech based outlets, like maybe gardening, or something related to building or making things, as ideas. I myself walk my dog, draw, paint, felt, do some gardening, walk around town, plan day trips, etc. Another idea I thought, would be to not only teach him that smashing up stuff isn't acceptable, (which I am glad you're getting on top of now), but I would also maybe use Disneyland as an incentive, or at least the finances of it. So, every time he smashes up a TV, maybe remind him that it costs a lot of money, and that with every smashed TV, is less money for Disneyland. It sounds harsh, I understand, but it's an idea that I think you could try. Which ever you decide, the end line is you CANNOT allow him to do this.
People tend to forget that autistic people and kids CAN be manipulative as well, and it is VERY important to get this nipped in the bud ASAP and get on top of it, (this is especially towards Anna) before they do this to more people because one day, they might do this to a person, who won't take that kind of thing and metaphorically, give him a black eye. Even worse, could get arrested.
A thought about a possible way to limit the damage to the tv's in future maybe to get a sheet of polycarbonate sheet over the screen area 🤔
You’re allowed to be grumpy too Kev, it must be bloody hard work!
I love you, Anna! You’re such a strong woman! You’ve been handed a tough situation, but you’ve handled it marvelously!
Yes, Anna has every right to be grumpy. I get it, too. She’s taken the responsibility for Andy’s actions, mom guilt, frustration and feeling helpless. It’s hard to be a mum, especially to a special atypical child.
Our son has autism and smashed a TV. We invested 60 quid in a viso max TV protector screen . . Bought it on Amazon. All good so far. Cheaper option than expensive cabinets.
Plus some white paint
When you get a new TV, you should insure it with Domestic and General. They will replace or fix any TV. My son does this. They have replaced it every time.
Great idea in theory but an insurer would whack up the premiums and try to wiggle out of costly replacements if it became a regular occurrence.
They're a business after all and can't act as a charity/community group.
@@beecity1007 ruining their lives is abit steep.
@@beecity1007 you have made an account to post this, Andy has autism and can't stop it *normally* although this time he may have done it intentionally. it isn't something that can be taught out of someone. In this situation you just have to find a way to get around all these things being broken and Anna and kev getting hurt etc.
@@danroberts7826 exactly
@@beecity1007 Indeed.
All of the decisions you've made as parents through this TV saga for want of better words, every decision you made was the right one! You know what's best for your child and you did what you had to do. Don't feel like this is your doing by stumping up a new TV so quickly in the past! Love you guys xxx
I completely understand Anna’s reaction, its such a frustrating situation and you are handing it the best you can. Ill have a look around on the internet to see if i can find something else cheaper than that site I suggested. And all ask around some colleges to see if they know anything too. Also, I agree. Annas tee shirt is pretty cool.
I'm glad you kept the raw footage in of you 2 bickering, it shows real people, real emotions and the strain it can put on you dealing with these situations. You can see from Anna she feels broken or deflated. Huge praise to you both
Sorry to hear you guys are having a bad time
Hopefully things we get sorted soon
Sending lots of love from an ASD mum
💗💗
Sending hugs to Anna 🥰 Let’s hope you can find an Andy proof tv cabinet!
Sending love and support. Being a parent is the hardest thing in the world and there are days when you just want to give up and lie in bed and cry. It's completely valid and okay to feel that way regardless of situation. Remember that bad moments or bad days don't make bad lives. Keep going guys you're doing an amazing job! Anyone can see that by how far Andy has come as a person.
Build a cover over the TV, you can get clear plastic so you can see through it.
Could not get over how pissed Anna look
Relationship goals = Anna " your cameras" Kev "our Cameras"
I'm so sorry guys, maybe you could set up a gofundme page for the new cabinet + TV? I know you probably don't like asking for help but I'm sure a lot of us here would love to help.
I worked in a group home one time to where we had an autistic resident that LOVED TV's. The company bought a cabinet for the new TV. It was anchored to the wall while sitting on the floor. I think the company paid about 1200.00 for it, but it definitely solved the problem of the TV fund draining so fast. I would definitely look into getting one for Andy. The TV stand needs to be as close to the wall though so that it can be secured.
Sorry to hear about this, must be so stressful for you both. Sorry Kev, your expressions when the subject of your camera came up, was bit David Brent esque 😂
"Does me buying cameras offend you"
Tough cabinets, are brilliant. I worked for the NAS and a new company with autism and both use these. I might be worth getting in touch with the NAS as sometimes they sell them or donated once they are no longer used. You could also possibly make one yourselves with the perspex and strong wood and then possibly on the wall, as they are so expensive.
Hope you guys are ok and hope as a family you get to enjoy the rest of your staycation:)
Hugs for Anna. Parenthood is stressful enough even on good days, so when things go wrong it is really tough. Unsure about what to do about a cabinet unfortunately but hope you fix it somehow.
Sending one huge hug from one mumma to another!
Poor Anna she looks so sad and frustrated hoping the rest of the week is better xx
I personally think you and Anna deal with situations better than anyone I know. There’s being grumpy and then there is just finding things difficult and upsetting and for sure you both are the latter. You both work together so well and I commend you both for it because I wouldn’t be so calm and collected. Be proud of yourselves and try not to be so hard on yourselves. Keep being amazing and I’m loving your too Anna 🥰
I know nothing of technology but what about a projector in a cage on the ceiling. Could it work with gaming?
My 6 year old son has autism and we have an industrial case around his tablet because he spits/dribbles on the tablet and water damages at least twice a year. Only problem is he's non verbal so shouting doesn't work so we got this case and it's worked a treat 🤣 completely understand the frustration, little man's cost us hundreds in tablets.
That does feel like learned behaviour
On a more positive note that is an amazing t shirt Kev
We use the cabinets you're talking about. Yes they are very expensive but i promise they are unbreakable. They can withstand a very angry and strong 20 year old man during a meltdown who is desperate to break the tv lol. Hope that gives you some clarity
I feel your pain and I wish I had an answer for you!! Sending you love and hugs!! I know that doesn't really help but I care for you all!! On a side note I love your shirts!!
if your having wifi issues were ever possible use powerline adaptors, they use the mains cable for internet
I feel so sorry for you both you look so deflated and I feel your pain. Kev laughing past the pain and Anna a bit snappy - my heart goes out to both of you. Wonderful parents, it’ll all work out ❤️ sending my love
Anna sending you massive hugs totally feel your pain and frustration.
My heart goes out to Anna, is there no way of a grant or something that could help with the costs ? X
I usually feel bad the day after a meltdown, I'm sorry your TV is broken
Hang in there. Keep putting the left foot in front of the right. We’re rooting for ya!
Mate watching these video''s I have so much respect for you and seeing the effort you and Anna put in for your family. Jolly good show. Slam Dunk and Sir Harrison Davis would be proud!!!!
Sending my love to you all I can see how difficult it is for everyone. I hope you get the internet sorted soon xxx
Kev I appreciate the video has nothing to do with internet connection but when you mention it you should try a power line adapter for the pc downstairs. If it's working well wired then a set of power line adapters should carry a similar supply as a wired connection.
Love watching the videos and it’s just amazing how much we rely on technology to the point of we don’t miss it until we don’t have it just love the way Anna was using the freezer to cool down
Have you tried making or getting made a bespoke pespex box for a tv? With holes in it for the cables etc. Much more resistant to break from glass. And gives Andy a thing to smash that might seem like his tv but isn't? Hope you manage to get some help with this!
Big hug Anna! 💕💕if if jumped into the icebox 😉
Would love to give Anna a hug.
sorry for the rubbish day hugs you both
If anyone is a jerk, it’s pretty damn understandable she’s not too happy about her son struggling, broken TV’s and stressing about what the next step they’ll take is. So everyone better not start on Anna cos that woman is an amazing mum.
Hi Kev and Anna:
We have a wall mounted cabinet with sturdy glass protection a distance away from the TV so the force of the impact of won't damage the TV ect,
Not sure how much they are and where you can get them from but they are very good and should be strong enough to resist protect the Andy's TV, Xbox ect whenever he experiences a problem he's not sure on how to respond to,
I hope this is useful to you please let me know and big hug to Anna 🤗
Time for Kevin to become handy with a saw. Make a frame n use flexible plastic/glass then it's totally inclosed and hopefully Andy proof
A new plan is required for TV s. Maybe no tv in his room.
How’s he gonna play Xbox if there’s no tv in his room?
@@christoperaaron8218 downstairs?
@@christoperaaron8218 yes downstairs
Your both doing amazing as parents it’s a learning curve and don’t even doubt yourself there is no guide to how to be parents but your both doing your best and we can all see that 💯❤️
I found this website
Robust Lounge Furniture TV Cabinet for Autism | Reinforced beds.
Hope this is helpful. 😀
Oh dang. Guess you are the Telly museum lol🥰
Hope your both ok? And hopefully things get easier for you. I'm going through the same thing at the moment
Are we allowed to Like Grumpy Anna? She plays off giggly Kev so well.
I'm so sorry to hear this happened again Kev and Anna, Anna has every right to be grumpy its perfectly understandable and valid and good for you Kev saying that if anyone has a go in the comment section at Anna they are getting blocked i hope things get better sending Anna hugs take care
hugs for you both of you .
A big hug to you Miss Anna!
Hope Anna feels better
Hey Guys. You’ve probably already considered it but have you thought about a small PROJECTOR (if there’s room/wall space). It may be a faff to install but I’m sure it’d be easier to protect/box in than a tv. Keep up the good work.
yer they use these tv protector things in pubs and bars even in beer gardens but I imagine there not cheep
You guys look so broken 😢. I feel bad for you and him. I know you guys will handle it all though. Best wishes to everyone ❤
If I were u I would make Andy do chores and things like that to earn some of the tv money so he knows if he breaks something he needs to work to get a new one
That would not work
Oh dear you clearly have no idea about Andy's situation, that totally wouldn't work
It's worth a try, plus, autistic kids NEED to learn to do chores as it's part of life skills.
Have you considered using a projector as a tv setup? Not sure if that’s an option or something Andy would accept but just a suggestion:) alternatively you can actually buy smash proof tv enclosures
www.jameshoggdisplay.digital/collections/outdoor-tv-enclosures/products/display-shield-19-30-enclosure
It's so hard looking after a child but one with sen is twice as much work and your allowed to be upset, these people who chat crap you try and look after a child with sen trust me it's the hardest thing in the world.
I understand thoroughly what you're going through. My brother once got angry and smashed his own hand by banging it ON THE tv and broke his bones, radius and ulna. It was a month long storm with hospital and operation and crying..... But his hand is fine now. Please don't worry. Lot's of love ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Imagine the situation in OT when doctors had to anesthetize him... The nurses were half in tears 😱😱😱
Don't we all wanna give Anna a cuddle . Bless her , the poor lady was about to cry and I feel so sorry for her . I did not know you could buy things like protected cupboard . Let alone make them , well spotted Kev's dad for spotting them . Yeah you properly have to put in living room . That way , he being checked over and he's in a good area . Hope you guys are ok 👍👍
Can you use the thick plexiglass (just thinner than "bullet proof") on all six sides, four sides and bottom glued together with epoxy or silicone (10 gallon+ fish tank style)? The top will be on hinges and a lock for access to remove tv if need be. Drill some big holes in sides and top for sound and heat venting, some smaller holes on bottom to screw this tv cabinet down to a sturdy table/desk/etc. Just something I thought up, we have Lowe's and Home Depot here in the states and we can rent the tools to drill the holes. not sure if you have anything like there.
It seems the main issue is that he has regressed when it comes to his communication skills. You are probably already doing this, but throughout the day, I would repeat a script with him about what to do if there is a problem with his tv. Also maybe put some visuals by the tv like a print of a stop sign saying “do not break tv” and another printed paper saying “Go ask mom or dad for help”. Laminate them and stick them by the tv. Have him read you the signs before he gets his tv remote for the day and at night when he gives the remote back. Maybe start a sticker reward chart just for him showing responsibility and care for his electronics.
Yes. I have a feeling my mother would have done this with me, but thankfully, I never did this.
I wouldn't say he regressed but his new go to seems to be to smash tv's and this could be a puberty thing puberty while on the spectrum result in some wild behvior he gets frustrated with his tech and instead of asking for help he let's his rage get the better of him I think they should find a way to integrate some of those headspace meditations into his everyday find some morning ones for him to do and teach him to deep breath maybe even make social stories so he can grasp it better he just needs to learn that faulty tech can be fixed or replaced but that he cannot smash it
Please, forgive Me is this comes across as Harsh, or Me being a Jerk, but I say.
I think having a TV in the Bedroom is not going to work out with Andy :( , I think it needs to be in the Lounge like the Old House, So You can Keep an Eye on Him. Anna is right there. I am afraid I have to say it may end up being a case of "No Games unless someone is Watching" :(
Perspex "Bash Protection" is a Good idea, a Shield against the Controller. Those Xbox Pads are Pretty Heavy! Your Dad has a Good Idea there. That or the Super-Tough Cabinet.
No, Anna is Right! I actually agree with Her that You Probably do not need So many Camera's! Sorry, I have to agree with Anna there.
You are also Right however, £1000 is the Price of a Holiday! You do not have the Money for a Load of TV's and a Holiday, its Either Or.
Well, I am afraid I see it mostly being a case of either a TV Downstairs, or Someone is going to have to Sit in His Room with Him... even with the Cabinet or the Bash Plate, As I am Sorry to Say, and this is coming from someone with Autism, this is Striking Me as a "learned Behaviour" . You need to keep an Eye on Andy when He Plays Games I think.
Either way, I also think it is Ridiculous that modern Consoles are so reliant on something as unreliable as the Internet, to the point they basically do not work without it, they really do need a "Failsafe" Offline mode, like STEAM has, IMO, for when the Internet Fails, so the Games will still boot up and Play, but, You don't get achievements, cloud save or Multiplayer.
I hope the Rest of the Week goes a Lot Better.
Either way, You are Right to come down Hard on this, the Home Andy will go to in Future is most likely *not* going to tolerate this kind of Behaviour, so, indeed, it needs to be nipped in the Bud.
Can’t stand the heat get out the kitchen haha seriously tho much love to u all my brother has autism and I have it mild so understand the struggles Andy and others go thru
Just want to send Anna a big Geordie hug. She looks so sad about it. I can't imagine how hard it must be worrying about the internet going off and what might happen, we have terrible internet here and it stresses me out, so I bet it works Andy up so much.
Stressful times for you guys. In regards to TV cabinets brand new are starting at £600 new, but it may help contacting any local care facilities and see if they have suppliers they can recommend or if maybe any have ones they are no longer needing, might be able to get one that way for less? All the best for you all though.
My sons autistic and the amount of stuff thats been broken is insane. My heart goes out to you both, especially Anna.
I'm autistic and I don't just break things frequently. These anger issues Are separate from autism.
@@rafialiprosser9909 my little boy is also 6 probably should of said that.
I hope you find someone to sort a cabinet out. On a happier note I love Anna’s top
Oh Anna, I didn’t think you were being grumpy. It is understandable that you are upset and fed up with the situation.
I’m so sorry for all of you. Anna , this must be devastating for you. But you are a wo mother doing the absolute best you can do given the situation. Kevin is amazing too. Hang in there. Ohhh by the way it’s 108 degrees here in Las Vegas. So trust me I feel ur pain for the heat. 🥰
Have a polycarbonate case made for the whole TV.... Wall mount the TV wall mount the polycarbonate case. I had the exact same issue. 3 days was our record. I had a joiner make mine and get it installed and bolted to the wall while it was at school
It or they
For your wifi issues, take a look at TP Link Deco's. Since buying them we've had no issues with wifi all over our house
The cabinet is expensive but would have already paid for itself by now. Might be worth saving up for one.
Aaah Anna , I feel for you . I think the cabinet is a good idea .
I totally understand we had the same issue. Omy this is very hard
Hello i work in a home for disabled kids, where televisions were also a problem. What we did was creating our own, it was created out off 2X4 and plexiglass. not aesthetically but did the job and were dirt cheap. If you want more information please don't be afraid to reach out!
Hope your are all good. I feel really bad for you .
If you want a protective tv cabinet then I’ll suggest if you check with pubs and restaurants some might be selling them
Run a wired connection to Andy's room, or better yet to the middle landing, and then have a switch with wired connections branching off to all the locations in the house where you need more reliable internet.
Oh no!
Hopefully your local Facebook etc will have a second hand replacement between now and the end of July
Oh no, sorry to hear
We got one those TV protective cabinets they are pretty good i notice the price has gone up alot since we got ours though. Only thing you have to watch is he cant tip it over but he will never be able to break into one.
Can you get a box to put around the TV, something he can’t get into to protect it? Perspex glass?