Alhamdulillah for my role as muslim woman. I love my home and husband. I hate to wonder around loosely, I'm happy my husband takes an interest in my safety, deen and general well being.
I came across one of your videos accidentally two weeks ago. I have been watching your videos literally nonstop.I’m becoming a diehard fan of your lectures.Your videos address something that was drastically missing in the Muslim community. We don’t talk about intimacy, we don’t talk about the sex, we don’t talk any of the things that you have a dress in your Videos. Thank you for being honest been real I’ve been informative Thank you!
Everything he said is true. He is a good man. For a convert he is a genius and an inspiration for all of us. As a convert I have a lot to learn from him.
That's I like about brother gabrial the most, people fight in comment box, people will troll him attack him personally and professionally but still he will say what has to be said.
One of the issues that I think is prevalent in the west is that the role of a woman in the household is no longer valued in western society. Women feel pressured to get a job or perhaps some women feel the need to work because of the financial pressure on a single income household. Once they start working, I can understand that cooking and cleaning would go out of the window as a priority because the gender roles within the family are now blurred. Working encourages free-mixing and a woman wearing the legislated hijab to work, will not find herself welcome in most corporate settings and so the hijab she is wearing starts to stray from what is correct according to the Qur'an and Sunnah. And it's a slippery slope from there... If we protect gender roles no matter how backwards it may seem to the rest of society, Muslims would see great benefit in that. After all, the western society is one that has brainwashed women into thinking liberation comes from taking off their clothes, which is much more backward and unnatural. So Muslim women shouldn't seek external validation from a society that objectifies it's women but instead stick to the Qur'an and Sunnah.
Allah has blessed a woman with the qualities of naturing, patience, tolerance , love etc and that is why a child until adulthood will ALWAYS love the mother more whislt the man is masculine so that he can work and earn for his family, protect his family, head of the house because Allah has given him the wisdom to do this.....
@@coastalcc6093 it means that I have had to fill both roles for it seems, like forever. I seem to find that every step is a struggle. I tried to understand why my father found me the man he did but I thought nevermind. You have beautiful children who have given you joy. I'm grateful. I'm tired of doing everything. And I mean everything.
@@SS-kp7hw Okkkk, i understand......& there has to be a solution on how "we" men can be involved or partake proportionally ...... & i cannot think of a valid excuse and each case is different. sometimes, men think their only role (is the main role too) is to work (provide) and that they are the only one's that are exhausted. since we are supposed to be (in general) the stronger one (physically), we need to put that energy into perhaps playing with the kids, assisting in the household chores..... & i know, it will be most appreciating for women just to see a smallll initiative ..... may Allah guide us all.
Yes, and women love that, but the Rasul, peace be upon him, also used that masculinity to help his wives in the home, mend his own socks (similar to ironing your own clothes) etc.
Yes, it is wrong for women to go out immodestly and work but we all live under the oppression of capitalism whether it is in the west or in the muslim world. A German study pre-pandemic indicated that 45% of the cost of items is due to riba in the system. In other words if riba was abolished, items would cost almost half as much. Inflation is so high lately with income stagnant. Women are compelled to work just to pay the basic bills and should do so with haya and in halal endeavours. It is only the very privileged middle or upper-middle class women that get to choose not to work outside the home. My m-i-l told me that in India it is more than common that the mother works outside the home then comes home to manage the house and children while the husband does nothing to contribute. These poor women have no Umar (RA) or khalifa or islamic court system to appeal to for justice. It is not feminism at the root of this problem it is the lack of an islamic system which regulates the relationships between each member of society. you and me (being a Muslim woman) should never considered ourselves has enemies but we should call out the oppression in this system just like in our beautiful examples -- calling out the killing of daughters and the short changing of people etc.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah. *1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi) *2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59 Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"* Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"* 3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
@@NadeemAhmed-nv2br wouldnt say a man who does not work. More like a lazy unhealthy man. If the man is chasing multiple aspirations would it not be okay?
Women tody have to ask their boss(most likely a man) for permission to use the bathroom or to go on their break or to take a off day for eid without batting an eyelash, but Allah and his messenger peace be upon him said take permission from your husband for a couple things and your payment is jannah not a measly 500 dollar paycheck and "why should i ask their husband?". Allahuakbar what a time we live in. May Allah grant us obiedient and respectable wives ameen. Wallahi all of us have become deceived in this dunya including me. Lets learn the fundamental builing blocks and proofs and evidences that build our iman and make it easy for us to hold up islam above any other ideoligy that has been fed to us. May Allah increase use in knowledge amiin.
These issues have arisen because some men abuse the rights given to them by allah. Most women want to listen and are reasonable. But when some men refuse women to visit with family which I have seen happen the that’s abusing your power. Even if you don’t like her sister for example, that’s still her sister. When they walk in a decide they don’t want the meal she has been cooking all day and say cook me some thing else, that’s unreasonable and cruel. These kind of men creat disobedience in women. Good men usually have obedient wife’s. Who they have good communication with and show love and care to.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah. *1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi) *2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59 Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"* Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"* 3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
to be fair if a husband tells his wife not to visit with certain family theres normally a good reason either the sibling will be a bad influence the wife may act different when returning home it is still a right of a husband does this happen often no but if it does its for a reason that the wife clearly can't see because she has love for them
Keep up good work , that’s the spirit , no matter whatsoever whoever likes or dislikes , say whats right,your duty as a scholar is done ,May Allah bless you with more and more courage to keep saying the right things , and I wish more and more women and men are like you,
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah. *1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi) *2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59 Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"* Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"* 3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
When a man has a supposedly good women who stays at home, cooks cleans etc then I have seen in many cases he disrespects her, takes her for granted. It appears as though the more a women does for the man the more he devalues her, not all cases but many. I would add, point is the man has a responsibility to be mindful and not just think of the women as JUST a housewife but rather have regard, respect, for the work she does in keeping a home. But instead the man gives off the attitude that she can’t be anymore than a housewife and in some cases may even talk about women outside who are working, almost as if he is praising them, leaving the women in a place of contradiction.
@@Drigger95 sadly it's becoming more Universal in the west where Muslim men want woman with college education rather than those that choose Deen. We're trying to find suitors for one of my female relatives and the majority of the men we encounter want a college-educated female and we know the fitnah in that environment. That's a reason why my female relative is now acquiring a college degree. I've also seen this mainly in South Asian culture where most men do not give time to their family and they think just earning is enough while Islam actually says to spend time
@@NadeemAhmed-nv2br it’s interesting, I’ve been watching Rebecca Barrett and some others on youtube and they discuss topics such marriage, feminism etc etc it appears men in general are not interested in how much a women earns or even her education/career level, they want someone who is loving, caring and wants to make a home, no drama and these men may not necessary follow any dean or religion and yet your saying Muslim men want this as a requirement, so what’s happened. Personally, I believe that many Muslims have not read the Quran to understand and then implement and implement in a beautiful manner, just my opinion.
Has umma lost common sense 😫. If the women is not cooking what is she eating?? If she has kids what is she feeding them. Also which women does not clean and sits in a dirty space. If she is a housewife what is she doing all day. It’s understandable if she is working and helping with bills which happens a lot in the west, then a man needs to help to enable them to flourish together. If they have wealth and the man can afford to get her help that’s understandable. But if she is not working what will she be doing all day?
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah. *1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi) *2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59 Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"* Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"* 3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
Good question… women nowdays they explicitly say they do not like house chores, they like business outside home, such as shopping, driving, travelling, etc. Their families support them by saying that they love their daughter and they should be happy no matter what, hence making things more difficult.
exactly. BUT people need to look at the wisdom. People icl most men think it’s because they are supremely better(though they have a darajah). Rather the wisdom is soo many. Think about, if women refuse sex the man will go else where to get it haram way. If the men are supposed to be leaders and Mujahidiin, do you expect a his family to argue with him when he makes a certain decision. If a man refuses a particular person to come to their house a good women should try understand and not argue because the protection of his family is on him. If a man knows all day other men are talking about women in the work force imagine how it drives him mad when he knows his wife is out working. Trust me this problem is even faced by non Muslim men(the manly man). That’s why in a Hadith that if a man sees a women who he feels to he should go home and have intamcy with his wife(in my own words)imagine if the wife said “I’m tired and rejected him and his desperate” unless he fears Allāh he’ll definitely go towards a haram path. This isn’t a matter of pleasure it’s a matter greater which zina and illegitimate kids(a whole evil per se), THAT IS THE PROBLEM. I struggle wearing Hijāb(not headscarf) just going good shopping. I think Subhana Allāh such a wisdom all together in Hijāb. It’s a miracle because I don’t understand how women can stay long outside wearing it. Which makes her want to not stay out long. Hijāb fits perfectly well with what a women should be AND her role. Once you take Hijāb out of the equation everything else goes. Think about it. If all those women who wants to wear the trousers where given the proper Hijāb they wouldn’t want to be out there working in construction along with men sharing biscuits like she’s one of them and after that they all talk about her.it’s like that in the police force,army, government level, business level all levels. Men are like hypocrites they treat you like a fellow human and after they are eating you up like a piece of meat. Don’t fool for this “we”. Unless you have to work, work in the least haram place(consult a Shiekh).if you can’t find totally Halal. But 1 there must be necessity then Halal after that speak to your local Shiekh. And when he wants another wife because of her lack of intimacy she’ll have a problem. And most marry behind her back which unfortunately is a problem too. If I was a man I would def marry an introvert it’s usually extraverts that can’t stand being indoors. I think those women are not satisfied with their husbands otherwise should of stayed single. If she was comfortable with him she would know that works comes 1st just as he is out working and that she can have her fun and intellectual conversation when he comes home. And a man should make his wife to feel proud that she was at home all day probably starving for a adult conversation, cleaning after a kids all day with all their “mommy every 2sec), cooking shouldn’t be a big deal although when you have many kids(or even the 2nd) can be tricky. Isn’t it easier for us to be at home and be in charge than be under a boss. Have your own tea breaks, dress comfortable than be uncomfortable and tired while making money for someone else? Come on sisters be honest to yourselves. Stay single if you don’t want to build a family and it’s only about intamacy for you, don’t annoy your brothers. Don’t follow the kufar women, by Allāh they are the oppressed fools. They are not in charge of anything and infact middle class or upper I should say and rich ones kids are most messed up because they have no one to come home to and some parents would travel abroad for work. Support your husband against other men and men respect your women when you come home and don’t think it’s only she has to pity your hard work, I think a mother’s work is nearly as hard as yours(those who have tough jobs such as leadership) it’s not easy being a mother(she wasn’t chosen 3tms over you just for labour). And communicate. Infact, choose wisely both of you!!! Btw a female too
Assalam-o-alaikum. You are different genre of scholar which we urgently need in this era. Within community, there is lack of discussion on masculinity, being male dominant, intimacy, sex and sexuality. That's why today's muslims youth take celebrities as their role models. We need more from you. Also this community need more scholars like you in this genre. Thank you
Who are these women who don"t want to cook, clean and satisfy their husbands? It seems extreme and I have never heard of this new phenomena. The majority of muslim women are very aware of all the hadiths and know their responsibilities as wives. Each marriage is unique with different circumstances and its up to the couple to organize the running of the household that is fair for all.
Incredible how women in the west expect a man to provide but are offended when the man asks them to do housework. One of the reasons I prefer north African women.
Well trust me , not everyone is good or bad , north african women r also full of liberal ideas to the extend that many of them consider marriage as evil even tho they are muslims , and they dont believe about other person happiness when they are not in the mood (individuality) , so i mostly see as a north african man , women that got nothing to do with islam from behavior to clothes to addressing none mahrims. Ask god for a good practicing wife and seek good muslim people to help u finding a muslim spouse.
Yes, women HAVE TO COOK AND CLEAN IF HER HUSBAND ASKS HER TO! As long what the husband is asking her to do is not haram, she has to do everything he says her to do. The only time she can say no is when the husband asks her to do something that's haram. Otherwise SHE HAS TO OBEY HIM. As sad as it is where we are now, we have to start normalizing obedience to husbands and going back to taking on our authentic roles as men and women.
How beautiful It is to be a muslim man. Heavy responsibility but great confidence is laid on them. The more I learn about Islam the more I fell in love with the position of men.
In my culture maid is a normal thing even if she doesn't work but the maid is an extra help so the wife will still cook and look after the house, husband and children but the burden is lowered so when the husband comes home at the end of the day she will not be too tired for him. I think the problem is both parties need to be understanding and appreciative of eachother
Imagine trying to be like "I'm fine to clean the kitchen if you're going to cook (that particular meal). But, can you please not leave a large mess in the kitchen by being tidy when you cook, and also put all of the used ingredients away after you take them out.." only to receive "I have to cook this way, sorry!".... hahhahahaha... Man I regret getting married after my previous divorce. Life is difficult for all living creatures, but home life isn't supposed to be complicated. and sadly I have a pretty negative perception of women now.
What a sad state of affairs when the man goes out for hours to provide for you yet you can't cook for him, wash his clothes etc and spend quality time with him in the bedroom department. It's just basic duties that don't take a lot of time yet they bring a lifetime of joy into the home life mashaallah.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah. *1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi) *2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59 Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"* Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"* 3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said: Zayd ibn Thaabit RA said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allaah, and he recited the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door” [Yoosuf 12:25] ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”
@@stanislavalexandravich3216 Following your logic we can say that behind every happy husband there is a miserable wife. So which one will you sacrifice?
@@shannons6188 sister I woudnt make a comment like that. Yes it is true that when Allah is happy with his servant tjat is good for him but saying it like this seems kind of childish like that way you tali to a kid which is not appropriat for Allah. He is the mosz high our rabb the one deserving the most respect. Im not making a fatwa but I do not think this is right.
OK sisters, you don't cook, you don't give intimacy, you don't clean the house, you want to work and earn for yourself, etc etc...so please tell me what is it that you supposed to do ?
@@the.art.of.shadows please don’t shame women like that, women respect themselves. If a women doesn’t want to do these domestic jobs then she can work and earn money. Simple
Sometimes, she has to have a back up option, which is a job. Let's say a convert woman that isn't accepted by her family gets married, stops working, gives it all, but she gets divorced after some years of marriage for whatever reason. She did not work and she has little to nothing. What is she gonna do? Live on the streets after the 3 months pass until she can find a husband?
The community can help. I also dont think parents would never accept their daughter back. Also there are institutions for jobs its not that hard to find one tbh if your not picky
Who are these sisters that refuse to cook for their husbands? I feel like people are exaggerating honestly bc I can't begin to imagine a woman so petty that she cooks to feed herself and doesn't at least make an extra portion for her husband. These conversations seem to exist in the realms of RUclips comment sections and gender wars.
@Chadjeet Fuqsdeep better food. AND sounds like you never had a real women that you don’t understand what a women can REALLY bring to the table. Men lack a lot and only a women can complete him. The women you’re thinking of who has too many demands of worldly things then she is gonna be a good wife. Look for the one who has Deen that the one who the Prophet alayhi salaatu wa salaam advices out of beauty and wealth or linage. A righteous wife would be good.
the funny thing is that they do everything for their boss, some women even go so far as to perform sexual acts with the manager. but when it comes to the man who is the gateway to paradise, then all of a sudden liberal feminist ideas come to the fore.
If early Muslim men did cooking and other housekeeping tasks, then how can you expect them to go out and fight or cultivate or earn, or do dawah? It does not make sense, even in today's time with all the modern day conveniences it takes time to cook and clean. Should men sit back? No! They need to be providers. Btw, they make better chefs. :D
Salam alaykum everyone. Thank you dear brother for defending what Sunna says about the role of the woman in the home. I would like to take a step back and elaborate on another point that causes the women to not want to cook and clean. Like you said, it all has to do with context. In my opinion, women are using the views of the liberals to express something else that is bothering them. In my opinion, not wanting to cook and clean is an cover-up expression of an unmet need and it is the unmet need that I would like you to address more because if we can identify what is bothering us at an emotional level and it is solved, we will have no problem cooking and cleaning for our husband. In my previous mariage, I realised that I was not getting enough validation of my husband's love for me, not because they were non existant but because we didn't show love in the same way (a book that speaks about this and that I highly recommend is : "the 5 languages of love" by Gary Chapmann). This led me to frustration and not having the energy to do housechores (also because I'm not the sort of person who show's my love by doing acts of service). But at the start of the mariage, I was fine with housechores because my love tank was full. If a woman is already bitter about something, she will more likely accept any "evidence" that comforts her state. If she has lost her bond with Allah, this will be even more difficult for her because she will have lost al furqan (the ability to distinguish good behavior that is pleasing to Allah from bad behavior detested from Allah) I wouls like us to explore more about the reasons for our bitterness and question our relationship to Allah. This is a reminder I do for myself first of all. We are all human and Allah accepts the repentance of the sincere believing man and woman. May Allah helps us stay on sirat al moustaqim (the straight path). Amin.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah. *1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi) *2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59 Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"* Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"* 3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
Salāmu alaykum brother. Baraku Allāhu fik. I have a request. I would appreciate if you addressed the men in your next topic who are abusive and arrogant towards their wife. Who care not for their kids or wife or even not work/pray/ or even addicted to alcohol. It boils my brain to see sisters being oppressed and this is widespread. And link: the husbands that expect the rights who are married to good women but don’t give them their rights. What kind of quality of kids can she raise with husband like that and so what kind of generation of Ummah will rise if households are like that. I think just as how important a man/father is if he lacks and is not a good man and abusive how detrimental that would be verse if a women was a bad woman. And that the reason a man has a high level is that how damaging it could be if he wasn’t fulfilling his rights. We know women are if not the most greatest fitna in the world but where are their men? That the men have become de’uses. The men are the head but if they loose it I.enjoy fulfilling their rights then the society would break up. I’m not those modern women but a genuine request that you grill them and hold them to account because majority of the women are suffering. Baraku Allāhu fik for your efforts.
@@ik5441you are right about checking and the opposite can be given as a spouse. A Somali proverb is : marriage is like a a dark room(you enter). I.e. you see the room has a nice door, nice building etc but once you enter you don’t know what you’ll find. And this regardless of who you picked( pious or not).
May Allah forgive and protect all Muslims dead or alive and grant us jannah by His mercy Aameen yaa Rabb Let’s share the reward together few seconds great reward in sha Allah:) Al-Qur’an is the greatest dhikr🌳❤️🥰 Subhan’Allah🌳❤️ Alhamdu lillah🌳❤️ Laa ilaaha illaa Allah🌳❤️ Allahu Akbar🌳❤️ Laa hawla wa laa quwwata illaa billah🌳❤️ Astagfirullah wa atuubu ilaihi🌳❤️ Subhan’Allahi wa bihamdihi Subhan’Allahil Azweem🌳❤️ May peace and blessings of Allah be upon our beloved prophet his companions and entire household🌳❤️ Yaa Allah whoever read these Azkar guide and grant them jannah without judgment or punishment Allahumma Aameen🤲🏼❤️
..when discussion about what to do in your life, with your best friend ever(wife/husband), become a topic for public consensus, you know society is rotten to the core..
Let the wife work and have her career, pay for a maid or take food from outside, the west is full of halal restaurants, it could be also a way to help our brothers who run their halal restaurants or fast food spots. Do this so you can rest and get intimacy on your off days. Muslim women have jobs, education, friends, hobbies… we don’t live just for you and I’m happy that it’s this way! You know why? Because I’ve seen those type of women who do nothing but cooking and cleaning getting treated like maids, the husbands don’t have conversations with them because there’s nothing to talk about since all her days are the same at home. I believe that respect is more important than anything in the world and if you think that women who work will cheat on their husbands etc I’ll gladly tell you that chatrooms in Arab countries are full of married women who are online all the time chatting with strangers because they’re bored in the house. Salam!
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Please, share this video. So much corruption from the modern muslim sisters, and I am too worried for my future marriage. I dont wanna deal with a wife who's gonna become stubborn and disobedient. I just want Allah to bless me with a wife who is content being at home and doing house duties whilst I work and provide. Please ya Allah
what is the point of the man having a wife around the house , just to put a roof over her head and clothe her. And she does not have to do anything. This is why some people talk about what she brings on the table. And many women hate hearing men ask that
This is completely unAmerican. What could a Muslim man expect here? and expecting a woman to ask her man for permission? May 200 years ago, but that ship sailed into history a while ago. Now the roles are reversed and most men don't notice or care. Some even support it.
A Noob summary: Yes. Women need to cook and clean for their house as they are the shepherds of their homes. That is, unless they are also having Jobs to begin with. In that case, both of you have to equalize it. But then, this is not the ideal islamic situation which the Quran and sunnah establishes. The ideal Islamic situation is for the man to handle financial responsibility, whereas the woman handles the responsibility of the home. If the woman starts working like a man does, then the woman will not be able to fullfill her ideal islamic responsibility which Islam has established for her. So, yes. Serving the household is indeed a woman's responsibility, and there are no ifs and buts in it. But a man should also help the home from time to time. But this does not mean a MAN should only do so, but the main person responsible for the home specifically is the woman. References: Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: I heard the Messenger (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) say: "All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd, a man is the shepherd over his family and a woman is the shepherd over her husband’s house and his children. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd." In another wording: ''All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his herd. A man is the shepherd over his family and is responsible for his herd. A woman is the shepherd over the house of her husband and is responsible for her herd. A servant is the shepherd over the wealth of his master and is responsible for his herd. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd.'' Sahih/Authentic. - [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] Explanation Everyone is entrusted with the protection and care of those under him, and will be held accountable for them. For instance, a ruler will be asked about his subjects on the Day of Judgment. Likewise, a man is responsible for his family, and he should command them to obey Allah, forbid them to disobey Him, and fulfill their due rights. He will be asked about these duties on the Day of Judgment. Also, a woman is responsible for keeping her husband’s house and for caring for the children, and she will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment. A servant is also a protector of his master’s wealth and will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgment. So everyone is invested with the responsibility of protecting those under their care and they will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment. If you think you can bring out an argument that overlaps this one. Feel free to do so, but make sure to cite references rather than ignorantly stating your own desire coated opinion.
If satanic propagaters are untiring I wish more and more people like you are untiring aswell to fight all hidden evil, I pray for more people like you ,we all need to train our sons and daughter both about our religion only then we ll be able to fight false propaganda.If our generation doesn’t ve a strong religious base and education they will be easily manipulated by evil,
To be honest, this is the * best* video so far! Masha Allah! With the proofs and excellent explanation! But these women will still try to twist and add some caramel to it
Alhuma Barek Allah Brother you speak the truth without any hesitation, it’s very rare to find content like this and Muslims like you, who has the guts to speak the honest truth. Please continue with your works.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said: Zayd ibn Thaabit RA said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allaah, and he recited the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door” [Yoosuf 12:25] ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”
@Rabya Ahmed Im not being a chauvinist, I simply asked a question. I simply want to see the reactions. Made too many assumptions. Of course men dont own there wife but is it too much to ask to just cook, clean, raise children and be a kind house-wife? Of course as long as the husband is bringing in enough money, there shouldnt be the need for the wife to work, if there isnt enough income then sure the wife can help but Im talking about a normal circumstance. Alot of Women these days even if there is enough money they still want to study and work, is it too much to ask to be a house-wife(again assuming the husband brings in enough money). Trust me the last thing I am is a chauvinist, I was raised by a single mother who did everything for me without a father.
@Rabya Ahmed Rabya, I am a woman, but I don't sell being a housewife short, the role of a housewife is very important, why? Because they hold the nuclear family in tact. I am a child of the early seventies (49) I've seen children be left at home, while their parents worked, and this was the U.S., my Mom was (almost) the only housewife and my childhood friends used to be so jealous of me, my parents raised us well because they made us their priority, and those kids who used to be left at home... upon growing up had gotten in all sorts of trouble including substance abuse, sexual promiscuity, and even being incarcerated. So the decline of society has been prevalent since woman have been in the "workplace", (this was the agenda of the West, to make life unbearable and force women out of their homes), I myself am married, been married for 31 years (Alhamdulilah) my husband sometimes struggles financially, we didn't live "extravagantly" I remained home and raised 6 kids, now four of my children are married with families of their own, my son doesn't want his wife to work and three of my daughters are also housewives, and they're not rich, with that being said I won't say that there are times woman need to help too (there are) and it doesn't mean that you're less than a good mother and wife, (I'm sure you're both), I'm not saying you can't be. I'm just putting it contextually, and Alhamdulilah our deen is for all ages, it's not only relevant to one time period in history, it's applicable in all times and our Prophet (PBUH) was adamant that a woman stayed homebound in support of her family.
Do you think majority of women choose to work? After listening to this man speak disrespectfully about wives (“tight jeans”…), I say Alhumdulillah Islam came and: 1. Allah prohibited jaheleya of men to bury girl child… and 2. Allah gave wives rights and husbands responsibilities 3. Allah gave women right to marry or not (It’s not fard), and take a divorce/qulah as needed 4. Allah said to men he can marry four if he can treat his wives equally further advising men on taking one wife. 5. Allah made men financially responsible for his wife and children. 6. Allah said paradise is at the feet of mothers 7. Prophet said Allah could’ve made wives make sujood to their husbands BUT HE DID NOT. Why do you think Allah did not order that? 8. Allah told wives to obey their husbands as He gave husbands full responsibilities for his wife and their childrens. And Allah said, best among you is he who treat his wife the best. Men want to marry doctors… professional women and want them to work. So now a days both husbands and wives work and so rest of the house chores have to be shared. And if the wife is stay at home then she can be expected to do 8 hours of housework as the husband is doing 8 hours at his job. But she needs rest just like he does. She is not a slave. She is a wife. She has to take care of herself too like he should. The roles of husband and wife is to be a comfort for each other not a burden or pain. Using kind words will help move mountains. On topics that are gray or not clear in Islam, do not create fitna. If certain things are important for you in marriage have it written in the nikkah agreement. For example, if a husband wants his wife to not work or wants her to cook every day then talk about these things before marriage and write it in nikkah agreement. You can do that. If the woman or girl doesn’t want to cook or doesn’t want to work, have it written in nikkah agreement. This video is not helpful in my opinion. Why place fuel in the fire!! We already have such a bad situation with Muslims not marrying or staying married. Let’s talk about solutions not problems. Boys want to play around instead of committing to marrying. Or we have those men who want to marry professionals and make the wife an atm machine. I can talk about these problems of Muslim men all day but I think it is better to talk kindly about our sisters and provide solutions. May Allah guide all of us and give us taufeeq to please Him alone, aameen.
Which is why Islam has established this lifestyle as the best one and the only one with the best of the best chances of success. A man takes care of his family's financial issues, whereas the woman takes care of the home of her husband's home. Meaning, their children and his house, she is responsible to serve his house. Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: I heard the Messenger (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) say: "All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd, a man is the shepherd over his family and a woman is the shepherd over her husband’s house and his children. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd." In another wording: ''All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his herd. A man is the shepherd over his family and is responsible for his herd. A woman is the shepherd over the house of her husband and is responsible for her herd. A servant is the shepherd over the wealth of his master and is responsible for his herd. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd.'' Explanation Everyone is entrusted with the protection and care of those under him, and will be held accountable for them. For instance, a ruler will be asked about his subjects on the Day of Judgment. Likewise, a man is responsible for his family, and he should command them to obey Allah, forbid them to disobey Him, and fulfill their due rights. He will be asked about these duties on the Day of Judgment. Also, a woman is responsible for keeping her husband’s house and for caring for the children, and she will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment. A servant is also a protector of his master’s wealth and will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgment. So everyone is invested with the responsibility of protecting those under their care and they will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment.
@@ummamanaah5064 nah bro thats not the reason there are shit ton of narcissistic feminist liberal clowns in comment section who would dislike the video because this brother speaks the truth as it is and their fragile ego cant handle the truth
I think when it comes to these topics, discuss this with the potential spouse! come to an agreement, I just think it's ridiculous people fight over this! sometimes as women, we're not able to do domestic work. Normal, your sick or whatever. People need to have some common sense, your husband works all day and provides for you and he comes home to no cooked meal and a filthy house! it's just diabolical. Unless you have many children and you need help get help. I don't understand what the issue is.
Understand in the hadith of the prophet it does not state helping it states busying serving his family if he is helping that means it is one person responsibility he is just doing it but that is what he used to do anytime he is in the house and when it is time for prayer he goes out.
But Gabriel understand that not all women want to go out and do what you are saying the house keeping responsibility is both on husband and wife shari'ah does not dictate it.
Women should choose a profession that will benefit the women and children of the ummah and which they can balance between their OBLIGATIONS of their family (HUSBAND).... KALAAS
@@Deaxon1 u understand or u don't. Wisdom and experience comes with time.... u either have it or don't..... pressed, nope..... I'm just taking the opportunity to express here (although not the best of platforms) as this topic is vast.....
@@imeeeemi6929 Ibn Hibbaan narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman prays her five (daily prayers), fasts her month (Ramadaan), guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be said to her: ‘Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.’” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 660.
@@Deaxon1 yes it helps..... and i haven't studied but i can the interpretation from a shaykh of authority...... and unfortunately, many are milkshaykhs now
Parameters of Obedience to husband 1. Sex when he requests (taking condition of wife into account) 2. Not given charity (his money) except with his permission 3. Not leaving home except with his permission 4. Not to fast nafl w/out his permission/knowledge 5. Do not allow anyone in the house unless it’s someone he approves of Outside of these five, obedience is not mandatory on a wife.
Let's rather listen to what a knowledgeable guy says Also it's not an 'obligation' of a husband to give her gifts It's not his obligations to but her nice things But ALL husbands do these EXTRA things, why? Because 1) they love their wife 2) Marriage won't flourish if it's a rights transaction It will only flourish if BOTH HUSBAND AND WIFE do extra! And if a husband doesn't do extra Things, his wife will probably say he is oppressive, this and that even tho he fulfilled his obligations! But she will leave him because she cherry picks You expect gifts, romantic things from him, then cook and clean Then it's fair Give favours, get favours It's a two way street
@@aatif7518 Not it is not. Also my points above are gathered from sound, Islamic sources. To your points about doing extra, yes, the operative word is extra. I agree that in a loving marriage, these things should be done. But in Islam, when discussing rights and obligations, that is a different matter. Meaning, she is not committing a sin according to Islam if she refuses to do them, or she wants to have a conversation and discuss it and come to some sort of mutual agreement.
@@deedeee6271 if she refuses to do them Husband would get angry Like the same say, if a husband refuses to buy something nice a wife asks, she will get sad, she will get a bad mood But is the husband sinning? No Can the wife ask for divorce? No (But the woman will ask saying he is cruel)
In todays society ppl are losing their roles and responsibilities as men and women. If he provides , takes care of you physically, emotionally and mentally, cultivates you and puts a roof over your head taking care of his needs and his household is the least you can do as his wife .... if he lacks in something encourage him to do better but don't do less or deny him things to discipline him... our aim should be to be the best version of ourselves at all times regardless of how the other half is behaving.... compete and out do each other in love and sunnah not pettiness subhanallah ...
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said: Zayd ibn Thaabit RA said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allaah, and he recited the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door” [Yoosuf 12:25] ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”
I don't have a problem with "obeying" or any other part of the deen that emphasises men being leaders over women.... I don't know what part of my comment made you leave 2 comments about "obeying a husband" was there something that triggered you ??
@@summerflower4058 you're replying under the assumption that just because I posted comments here I must be opposing you. There are other options you know, maybe, you can take heed from. Like backing you up with facts from Qur'an and sahih hadiths (which I actually did, btw)
I thought you were one of those feminist hunters lol and I'm far from that . Anyways Jazakallah to both of you my brothers our thoughts were aligned and thats all that matters.
Just because I speak for the haqq I'm a feminist! When I speak pro polygany it's 'way to go sister' from the brothers, but when I speak about the treatment of sisters in the home according to the sunna I'm a feminist. 'I asked `Aisha what did the Prophet (peace be upon him) use to do at home. She replied. "He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer." حَدَّثَنَا حَفْصُ بْنُ عُمَرَ، حَدَّثَنَا شُعْبَةُ، عَنِ الْحَكَمِ، عَنْ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، عَنِ الأَسْوَدِ، قَالَ سَأَلْتُ عَائِشَةَ مَا كَانَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَصْنَعُ فِي أَهْلِهِ قَالَتْ كَانَ فِي مِهْنَةِ أَهْلِهِ، فَإِذَا حَضَرَتِ الصَّلاَةُ قَامَ إِلَى الصَّلاَةِ. Reference : Sahih al-Bukhari 6039 In-book reference : Book 78, Hadith 69 USC-MSA web (English) reference : Vol. 8, Book 73, Hadith 65
I read somewhere and will appreciate if anyone can confirm .... the mother of girl baby has half the quantity of milk to that of the mother of a boy baby..... makes sense, girls are soft, fragile, etc whilst a boy needs more milk and grows stronger, etc
Min 11.35: It was Ibn Abbas not Ibn Omar. Ibn Abbās said, (I fear that) stones will soon rain down upon you from the skylI say, "The Messenger of Allāh () said;" and you say, “Abū Bakr and Umar said!" 1 This narration is quoted in numerous works of ibn Taymiyyah such as Majmoo’ Al-Fatăwā, vol. 20, pp. 215, 251, vol. 26, pp. 50, 281. It is also mentioned in numerous works of ibn al-Qayyim such as Zád al-Ma'äd, vol. 2, pg, 195. Ahmad #3121 and Bazzār #5052 record it with the words, I think that you are soon to perish! I say, "The Prophet () said," and he says, “But Abū Bakr and Umar proscribed it!" Ibn Muflih, a-Adāb al-Shariyab, vol. 2, pg, 74 said that it was hasan. Ibn Abdul-Barr, Jämi Bayān al Ilm, vol. 2, pg, 1209 records it with the words, By Allāh, I do not think you will stop until Allāh punishes you! We narrated to you the words of the Messenger of Allāh () and you narrate to us the words of Abū Bakr and Umar!' The isnād is şahih. Tabarānī, alAwsat #21 with the words, Woe to you! In your view, do (Abū Bakr and Umar) come before what is in the Book of Allah and what the Messenger of Allah () legislated for his Companions and his nation? Haythamī, vol. 3, pg, 234 said the isnād was hasan.
If the men were real men lots of problem would not happen. Some men wants to put the financial burden on women otherwise throw tantrum and women bcs of kids tolerate lots of things.
Maybe when the mother is like Khadijah. She must obey him and make the house a place of peace for him. so when he tells the wife to do everything she obeys immediately with no arguments and is happy. So she should by default do everything in the house. Like cook, clean, do the laundry etc (btw this is her duty in marriage but feminists are complaining). A woman should serve her husband without expecting anything from him. Then maybe because the man is so stress free he will be willing to help or do things on his own from the goodness of his heart. This will definitely increase the love between the spouse whether he helps or doesn't because he will be able to appreciate his wife more.
@@shadowstorm5261 without expecting anything from him? You mean you want the sisters to abide by Islam but not the brothers? So when the Prophet, peace be upon him, mended his own shoes, and helped is wives around the house you don't want to follow that? This is why our sisters have gone towards feminism. You have a British Colonialist mind, not the mind of Rasul. Have you forgotten the Khalifs that went to the house of the old blind woman; cleaned, and cooked for her every day? They didn't send their wives. You seem to have forgotten the sadaqa to give to your wives; you think that they are only servants for you. Don't you know that a husband who helps his wife will earn more respect and love from her? Do you want to be in the house all day every day dealing with the children? Wow, there is just no wanting to work together. It's all about you, you, you.
@@alliyahsgalaxy the wife shouldn't ask anything like dish washer, vacations by planes, TV smartphones as all these weren't there during the era of prophet Muhammad saw
Did he just correlate every career working women to someone who wears pants, freely mixes with men, wears "Convertible hijabs", and puts lipstick on. like how do you seriously think that is an okay statement to make? Just say you want women to stay at home and do nothing but take care of you if thats what you want. Don't however rope in amazing women, who are both great moms and career women ( doctors, teachers, counselors etc.) and are also religious and uphold their duties. Don't belittle women to either staying at home or becoming deviant kufaars as soon as they start thinking of contributing to society. There is a world you are ignoring in which muslim couples share duties (household, finances or otherwise, however they please) and both grant the islamic rights upon each other. It seems like you have a deep hate for any career seeking women (given by the fact that you keep tying that to deviance), so hopefully you can rid your heart of all that extremism. Cooking and cleaning is such a basic skill that everyone should know and complete. People can share the duties depending on who works more and less, there shouldn't be much debate after that.
I mean of course he hates it because I’m the west they allow for free mixing and promote the woman beautifying herself in public. Causes for great fitnah not only between the couple but in her so called “job” unless if she’s some doctor.
First off, realize that Islam isn't something to be managed with everything else. If you believe it to be true, Islam comes first (in how you live your life) and then you can fill your time with whatever else. Second, your idea of being a career woman and equating that to the only way (implied) to contribute to society is without merit. Child rearing is an equally important part of society and should be focused on more. Just because the Western view equates labor that is exchanged for money as the only kind of "valuable" or "productive" labor doesn't mean we have to. All labor is equally strenuous and deserves appreciation. Mothers/wives who dedicate their time to the care of children and the home should be valued more because that is more selfless then being a career women (emphasis on career. Women who have to work have to work. No judgement on them) will ever be. On your point of couples balancing out responsibility, to assume that they juggle between roles is again something you should think about. Roles are set early on in the relationship and changing them drastically effects the relationship (this isn't a sitcom) or it could lead to destabilising the quality of life for the children. Lastly, no one says a woman shouldn't be a doctor or whatever else she wants but in the context of marriage her role is to the children and the home. Anything else she does is secondary. If it becomes difficult then that is what is dropped (unless there's a need for it then the couple can work it out between themselves). Wives who value work more than their role (career women) can't be thought of as performing their religious duties (it's not just Salah and fasting) similar to a husband who doesn't provide for his family in everything. And it is advised to them to stop because it may compromise their primary duty. Cooking for someone who's been out all day is a kindness. It should be done with that intent and it should be something the husband appreciates.
@@junaid2266 I said they could be both. Never did I say being a career woman was the *only* way to contribute to Society. My question is why do they have to choose? They can do both, it’s belittling to say you can only do one. Like for gods sake our beloved prophets wife was a business woman and she still had children, however Khadija( RA) had a supportive husband who not only helped her with her career ( worked for her) but also helped around the house. I am an aspiring pre-health student. I will not only help heal people with the knowledge I will inshallah have but will also raise Amazing children bidniallahi tacalaa. My spouse *will* help me around the house. Point. Blank. Period. If that makes me a crazy lunatic feminist then that’s you’re opinion. He’s sole responsibility isn’t just finances. That is how many men get away with being absent fathers, when you teach young men that their only responsibility is earning money, and the rest of the families duties lie on the mother. Now to your point of roles being changed, that’s not what I said. I meant each couple will do what’s best for them, i.e they will decide on that @ the beginning of their marriage. Who are we to dictate what a couple decides to do with their kitchen and living room??? If they both decide to share household duties as in * I’m responsible to take out the trash, bring kids home from school, teach my kids Sunday school, and you’re in charge of this this and that* what is so wrong with that?
A woman cooking for her husband today, is much more difficult than it was 30 years ago, and even more harder than it was 100 years ago. We have to take into account what's changed around us and how life is nowadays. Especially if living in the west. Not absolving women from their duties, but are we taking this into account?
How with all this new technological advancements cooking today is easier then it was 100 years ago? Today you have everything you need to cook easily available in nearby stores so will you kindly tell me how it is harder today than it was 100 years ago?
Lol It's easier today Before you need to heat the coal, burn firewood, have less equipments Today, you got stove, dishwasher, taps with clean fast water, cookers,ovens, washing machines, etc
Yes wives should do their job, plus when we have older kids they should be taught responsibilities & they can help the wife with these duties. It’s not that hard to cook, clean & have sex lol what’s the big deal ladies?? I am a women btw
🤣🤣🤣🤣exactly. BUT people need to look at the wisdom. People icl most men think it’s because they are supremely better(though they have a darajah). Rather the wisdom is soo many. Think about, if women refuse sex the man will go else where to get it haram way. If the men are supposed to be leaders and Mujahidiin, do you expect a his family to argue with him when he makes a certain decision. If a man refuses a particular person to come to their house a good women should try understand and not argue because the protection of his family is on him. If a man knows all day other men are talking about women in the work force imagine how it drives him mad when he knows his wife is out working. Trust me this problem is even faced by non Muslim men(the manly man). That’s why in a Hadith that if a man sees a women who he feels to he should go home and have intamcy with his wife(in my own words)imagine if the wife said “I’m tired and rejected him and his desperate” unless he fears Allāh he’ll definitely go towards a haram path. And when he wants another wife because of her lack of intimacy she’ll have a problem. And most marry behind her back which unfortunately is a problem too. If I was a man I would def marry an introvert it’s usually extraverts that can’t stand being indoors. I think those women are not satisfied with their husbands otherwise should of stayed single. If she was comfortable with him she would know that works comes 1st just as he is out working and that she can have her fun and intellectual conversation when he comes home. And a man should make his wife to feel proud that she was at home all day probably starving for a adult conversation, cleaning after a kids all day with all their “mommy every 2sec), cooking should be a big deal although when you have many kids(or even the 2nd) can be tricky. Isn’t it easier for us to be at home and be in charge than be under a boss. Have your own tea breaks, dress comfortable than be uncomfortable and tired while making money for someone else? Come on sisters be honest to yourselves. Stay single if you don’t want to build a family and it’s only about intamacy for you, don’t annoy your brothers. Don’t follow the kufar women, by Allāh they are the oppressed fools. They are not in charge of anything and infact middle class or upper I should say and rich ones kids are most messed up because they have no one to come home to and some parents would travel abroad for work. Support your husband against other men and men respect your women when you come home and don’t think it’s only she has to pity your hard work, I think a mother’s work is nearly as hard as yours(those who have tough jobs such as leadership) it’s not easy being a mother(she wasn’t chosen 3tms over you just for labour). And communicate. Infact, choose wisely both of you!!! Btw a female too.
Do you have small children? I don't think so. You would be talking differently. When you don't have time to even go to toilet, then yes, it's freaking problem to do all those things.
People here obviously live outside reality, never been married and do not have idea what they are parroting about. Do you even have idea how hard it is, to cook and clean while taking care all day for small baby/babies? I have 4 months old child (that does not take long naps during day, only 10 minutes) and beside being up half of the night, and taking care of her all day long, from which my back hurts horribly, I don't have time to cook and clean. My husband helps me. He sees how hard it is, and he doesn't have that much evil in him like people here, who have guts to require food and clean house from an overworked woman. I'm writing this at 4 AM, while taking care of my baby, while my husband is sleeping.
Exceptions don't make the rule. Most babies sleep for hours. Typically a baby sleeps like 11-14 hours a day. This is plenty of time to do other things, while observing your kid on a baby monitor or something
@Zik Zak so the man comes home and wants to relax. When will the woman relax? If mam wants good looking wife and food and good mood in home, he must take care of babies himself after coming from work.
@@alghurraba There are a few hadiths with regards to the child showing love and allegiance to the mother over the father thrice before the fathers turn. This emphasises on the fact that due to the sacrifices of the mother she has earned the gold, silver and bronze medal. Father gets the constellation prize. You don't get this without working for it. Secondly as the popular hadith goes, jannah is under the feet of the mother. The sacrifices you are making now for your babies is the reason jannah is under your feet, you do not earn such a status as jannah being under your feet by doing nothing or complaining. This status isn't easy to achieve. My advice to you would be to persevere and realise that the status you have as a mother in Islam is honoured and respected for these very struggles you are facing. It doesn't come easy. The more you complain about it the more you detract from the rewards. I'm sure your husband would help if he could. But the reality is that the main carer of the babies is the mother and the husband does what he can to make it easy for his wife. The husband also makes many sacrifices during this time as well. Don't get it twisted.
Alhamdulillah for my role as muslim woman. I love my home and husband. I hate to wonder around loosely, I'm happy my husband takes an interest in my safety, deen and general well being.
You and your husband both are lucky sister
May allah bless you....Ameen
May Allah bless you. I also want a husband like Sahabas. They were good muslims.
I came across one of your videos accidentally two weeks ago. I have been watching your videos literally nonstop.I’m becoming a diehard fan of your lectures.Your videos address something that was drastically missing in the Muslim community. We don’t talk about intimacy, we don’t talk about the sex, we don’t talk any of the things that you have a dress in your Videos. Thank you for being honest been real I’ve been informative
Thank you!
Sameeee
Everything he said is true. He is a good man. For a convert he is a genius and an inspiration for all of us. As a convert I have a lot to learn from him.
That's I like about brother gabrial the most, people fight in comment box, people will troll him attack him personally and professionally but still he will say what has to be said.
and you are his troll police?
@@tonyausten2168 if he is a troll police that makes you? I mean some1 has to keep you guys in check dont you think 🤭🤭
@@_Ruhul10 Nice ,meeting you again Troll Police. :)
@@tonyausten2168 so you confirm you're a troll?
One of the issues that I think is prevalent in the west is that the role of a woman in the household is no longer valued in western society. Women feel pressured to get a job or perhaps some women feel the need to work because of the financial pressure on a single income household. Once they start working, I can understand that cooking and cleaning would go out of the window as a priority because the gender roles within the family are now blurred. Working encourages free-mixing and a woman wearing the legislated hijab to work, will not find herself welcome in most corporate settings and so the hijab she is wearing starts to stray from what is correct according to the Qur'an and Sunnah. And it's a slippery slope from there... If we protect gender roles no matter how backwards it may seem to the rest of society, Muslims would see great benefit in that. After all, the western society is one that has brainwashed women into thinking liberation comes from taking off their clothes, which is much more backward and unnatural. So Muslim women shouldn't seek external validation from a society that objectifies it's women but instead stick to the Qur'an and Sunnah.
Such a deep and great comment!
Do you think majority of women choose to work?
Allah has blessed a woman with the qualities of naturing, patience, tolerance , love etc and that is why a child until adulthood will ALWAYS love the mother more whislt the man is masculine so that he can work and earn for his family, protect his family, head of the house because Allah has given him the wisdom to do this.....
not for everyone....you sound spoilt...try being the man and the women. earthly punishment for I dont know what
@@SS-kp7hw I am confused at your comment "try being the man and the woman" & "earthly punishment for i don't know what"..... please explain
@@coastalcc6093 it means that I have had to fill both roles for it seems, like forever. I seem to find that every step is a struggle. I tried to understand why my father found me the man he did but I thought nevermind. You have beautiful children who have given you joy. I'm grateful. I'm tired of doing everything. And I mean everything.
@@SS-kp7hw Okkkk, i understand......& there has to be a solution on how "we" men can be involved or partake proportionally ...... & i cannot think of a valid excuse and each case is different. sometimes, men think their only role (is the main role too) is to work (provide) and that they are the only one's that are exhausted. since we are supposed to be (in general) the stronger one (physically), we need to put that energy into perhaps playing with the kids, assisting in the household chores..... & i know, it will be most appreciating for women just to see a smallll initiative ..... may Allah guide us all.
Yes, and women love that, but the Rasul, peace be upon him, also used that masculinity to help his wives in the home, mend his own socks (similar to ironing your own clothes) etc.
If we follow the sunnah properly these problems wouldn't arise
Yes, it is wrong for women to go out immodestly and work but we all live under the oppression of capitalism whether it is in the west or in the muslim world. A German study pre-pandemic indicated that 45% of the cost of items is due to riba in the system. In other words if riba was abolished, items would cost almost half as much. Inflation is so high lately with income stagnant. Women are compelled to work just to pay the basic bills and should do so with haya and in halal endeavours. It is only the very privileged middle or upper-middle class women that get to choose not to work outside the home. My m-i-l told me that in India it is more than common that the mother works outside the home then comes home to manage the house and children while the husband does nothing to contribute. These poor women have no Umar (RA) or khalifa or islamic court system to appeal to for justice. It is not feminism at the root of this problem it is the lack of an islamic system which regulates the relationships between each member of society. you and me (being a Muslim woman) should never considered ourselves has enemies but we should call out the oppression in this system just like in our beautiful examples -- calling out the killing of daughters and the short changing of people etc.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah.
*1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi)
*2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59
Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"*
Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"*
3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
@@jubairomar2676 b******* a man who does not work does not deserve to be married and his marriage deserves to be an annulled and voided.
@@NadeemAhmed-nv2br Welp if crap comes outta ur mouth then u also don't deserve a husband 🙂🙂🙂. We men don't wanna die faster from broads like you. 🙂🙂🙂
@@NadeemAhmed-nv2br wouldnt say a man who does not work. More like a lazy unhealthy man. If the man is chasing multiple aspirations would it not be okay?
Women tody have to ask their boss(most likely a man) for permission to use the bathroom or to go on their break or to take a off day for eid without batting an eyelash, but Allah and his messenger peace be upon him said take permission from your husband for a couple things and your payment is jannah not a measly 500 dollar paycheck and "why should i ask their husband?". Allahuakbar what a time we live in. May Allah grant us obiedient and respectable wives ameen.
Wallahi all of us have become deceived in this dunya including me. Lets learn the fundamental builing blocks and proofs and evidences that build our iman and make it easy for us to hold up islam above any other ideoligy that has been fed to us. May Allah increase use in knowledge amiin.
And these women are increasing,and we muslim men are becoming simps,it's high time to change these things.
These issues have arisen because some men abuse the rights given to them by allah. Most women want to listen and are reasonable. But when some men refuse women to visit with family which I have seen happen the that’s abusing your power. Even if you don’t like her sister for example, that’s still her sister. When they walk in a decide they don’t want the meal she has been cooking all day and say cook me some thing else, that’s unreasonable and cruel. These kind of men creat disobedience in women.
Good men usually have obedient wife’s. Who they have good communication with and show love and care to.
@@sarahosman9030 These are very extreme cases. What he is talking about is very common.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah.
*1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi)
*2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59
Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"*
Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"*
3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
to be fair if a husband tells his wife not to visit with certain family theres normally a good reason either the sibling will be a bad influence the wife may act different when returning home it is still a right of a husband does this happen often no but if it does its for a reason that the wife clearly can't see because she has love for them
Keep up good work , that’s the spirit , no matter whatsoever whoever likes or dislikes , say whats right,your duty as a scholar is done ,May Allah bless you with more and more courage to keep saying the right things , and I wish more and more women and men are like you,
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah.
*1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi)
*2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59
Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"*
Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"*
3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
When a man has a supposedly good women who stays at home, cooks cleans etc then I have seen in many cases he disrespects her, takes her for granted. It appears as though the more a women does for the man the more he devalues her, not all cases but many. I would add, point is the man has a responsibility to be mindful and not just think of the women as JUST a housewife but rather have regard, respect, for the work she does in keeping a home. But instead the man gives off the attitude that she can’t be anymore than a housewife and in some cases may even talk about women outside who are working, almost as if he is praising them, leaving the women in a place of contradiction.
don't universalize your own experience.
@@Drigger95 this is a platform for us to share our thoughts, experiences etc
@@Drigger95 sadly it's becoming more Universal in the west where Muslim men want woman with college education rather than those that choose Deen. We're trying to find suitors for one of my female relatives and the majority of the men we encounter want a college-educated female and we know the fitnah in that environment. That's a reason why my female relative is now acquiring a college degree. I've also seen this mainly in South Asian culture where most men do not give time to their family and they think just earning is enough while Islam actually says to spend time
@@NadeemAhmed-nv2br it’s interesting, I’ve been watching Rebecca Barrett and some others on youtube and they discuss topics such marriage, feminism etc etc it appears men in general are not interested in how much a women earns or even her education/career level, they want someone who is loving, caring and wants to make a home, no drama and these men may not necessary follow any dean or religion and yet your saying Muslim men want this as a requirement, so what’s happened. Personally, I believe that many Muslims have not read the Quran to understand and then implement and implement in a beautiful manner, just my opinion.
True
Has umma lost common sense 😫. If the women is not cooking what is she eating?? If she has kids what is she feeding them. Also which women does not clean and sits in a dirty space. If she is a housewife what is she doing all day. It’s understandable if she is working and helping with bills which happens a lot in the west, then a man needs to help to enable them to flourish together.
If they have wealth and the man can afford to get her help that’s understandable. But if she is not working what will she be doing all day?
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah.
*1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi)
*2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59
Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"*
Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"*
3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
@@jubairomar2676 “peace”
Good question… women nowdays they explicitly say they do not like house chores, they like business outside home, such as shopping, driving, travelling, etc. Their families support them by saying that they love their daughter and they should be happy no matter what, hence making things more difficult.
exactly. BUT people need to look at the wisdom. People icl most men think it’s because they are supremely better(though they have a darajah). Rather the wisdom is soo many. Think about, if women refuse sex the man will go else where to get it haram way. If the men are supposed to be leaders and Mujahidiin, do you expect a his family to argue with him when he makes a certain decision. If a man refuses a particular person to come to their house a good women should try understand and not argue because the protection of his family is on him. If a man knows all day other men are talking about women in the work force imagine how it drives him mad when he knows his wife is out working. Trust me this problem is even faced by non Muslim men(the manly man).
That’s why in a Hadith that if a man sees a women who he feels to he should go home and have intamcy with his wife(in my own words)imagine if the wife said “I’m tired and rejected him and his desperate” unless he fears Allāh he’ll definitely go towards a haram path. This isn’t a matter of pleasure it’s a matter greater which zina and illegitimate kids(a whole evil per se), THAT IS THE PROBLEM.
I struggle wearing Hijāb(not headscarf) just going good shopping. I think Subhana Allāh such a wisdom all together in Hijāb. It’s a miracle because I don’t understand how women can stay long outside wearing it. Which makes her want to not stay out long. Hijāb fits perfectly well with what a women should be AND her role.
Once you take Hijāb out of the equation everything else goes. Think about it.
If all those women who wants to wear the trousers where given the proper Hijāb they wouldn’t want to be out there working in construction along with men sharing biscuits like she’s one of them and after that they all talk about her.it’s like that in the police force,army, government level, business level all levels. Men are like hypocrites they treat you like a fellow human and after they are eating you up like a piece of meat. Don’t fool for this “we”.
Unless you have to work, work in the least haram place(consult a Shiekh).if you can’t find totally Halal. But 1 there must be necessity then Halal after that speak to your local Shiekh.
And when he wants another wife because of her lack of intimacy she’ll have a problem. And most marry behind her back which unfortunately is a problem too. If I was a man I would def marry an introvert it’s usually extraverts that can’t stand being indoors. I think those women are not satisfied with their husbands otherwise should of stayed single. If she was comfortable with him she would know that works comes 1st just as he is out working and that she can have her fun and intellectual conversation when he comes home. And a man should make his wife to feel proud that she was at home all day probably starving for a adult conversation, cleaning after a kids all day with all their “mommy every 2sec), cooking shouldn’t be a big deal although when you have many kids(or even the 2nd) can be tricky.
Isn’t it easier for us to be at home and be in charge than be under a boss. Have your own tea breaks, dress comfortable than be uncomfortable and tired while making money for someone else? Come on sisters be honest to yourselves. Stay single if you don’t want to build a family and it’s only about intamacy for you, don’t annoy your brothers. Don’t follow the kufar women, by Allāh they are the oppressed fools. They are not in charge of anything and infact middle class or upper I should say and rich ones kids are most messed up because they have no one to come home to and some parents would travel abroad for work. Support your husband against other men and men respect your women when you come home and don’t think it’s only she has to pity your hard work, I think a mother’s work is nearly as hard as yours(those who have tough jobs such as leadership) it’s not easy being a mother(she wasn’t chosen 3tms over you just for labour). And communicate.
Infact, choose wisely both of you!!!
Btw a female too
That was a very well written and accurate comment sister. Finding women like you is really rare.
@@aarfeenanees9147 lovely comment. Baraku Allāhu fik
Assalam-o-alaikum. You are different genre of scholar which we urgently need in this era. Within community, there is lack of discussion on masculinity, being male dominant, intimacy, sex and sexuality. That's why today's muslims youth take celebrities as their role models. We need more from you. Also this community need more scholars like you in this genre.
Thank you
Be careful he's not a scholar, but alhamdulellah for his videos
Who are these women who don"t want to cook, clean and satisfy their husbands? It seems extreme and I have never heard of this new phenomena. The majority of muslim women are very aware of all the hadiths and know their responsibilities as wives. Each marriage is unique with different circumstances and its up to the couple to organize the running of the household that is fair for all.
Jazaak Allahu khairan brother Gabriel❤
Incredible how women in the west expect a man to provide but are offended when the man asks them to do housework. One of the reasons I prefer north African women.
Well trust me , not everyone is good or bad , north african women r also full of liberal ideas to the extend that many of them consider marriage as evil even tho they are muslims , and they dont believe about other person happiness when they are not in the mood (individuality) , so i mostly see as a north african man , women that got nothing to do with islam from behavior to clothes to addressing none mahrims. Ask god for a good practicing wife and seek good muslim people to help u finding a muslim spouse.
@@Abujound I’m a North African Muslim women and I didn’t get infected by this western disease. Although what you said was true. I’ve seen it.
Yes, women HAVE TO COOK AND CLEAN IF HER HUSBAND ASKS HER TO! As long what the husband is asking her to do is not haram, she has to do everything he says her to do. The only time she can say no is when the husband asks her to do something that's haram. Otherwise SHE HAS TO OBEY HIM. As sad as it is where we are now, we have to start normalizing obedience to husbands and going back to taking on our authentic roles as men and women.
He cannot ask her what is overbearing and not within his rights for islam. ex being a wife doesn’t have to take care of her in laws
@@killlachief589 women shouldn't ask their husbands what are beyond basics of life too. No vacations, cars, etc
@@d.bcooper2271 okay
I Want to know that is there is any concept of women's own choice in Islam or not?
Br Gabriel supported his arguments by the Quran and Sunnah - if you don't like it you don't like Islam
How beautiful It is to be a muslim man. Heavy responsibility but great confidence is laid on them. The more I learn about Islam the more I fell in love with the position of men.
WOAH, The comment section is a battle field
In my culture maid is a normal thing even if she doesn't work but the maid is an extra help so the wife will still cook and look after the house, husband and children but the burden is lowered so when the husband comes home at the end of the day she will not be too tired for him. I think the problem is both parties need to be understanding and appreciative of eachother
Imagine trying to be like "I'm fine to clean the kitchen if you're going to cook (that particular meal). But, can you please not leave a large mess in the kitchen by being tidy when you cook, and also put all of the used ingredients away after you take them out.." only to receive "I have to cook this way, sorry!".... hahhahahaha... Man I regret getting married after my previous divorce. Life is difficult for all living creatures, but home life isn't supposed to be complicated. and sadly I have a pretty negative perception of women now.
What a sad state of affairs when the man goes out for hours to provide for you yet you can't cook for him, wash his clothes etc and spend quality time with him in the bedroom department. It's just basic duties that don't take a lot of time yet they bring a lifetime of joy into the home life mashaallah.
MashAllah sister if only every sister thought the way you do
Ma chae Allah,
JAZAK ALLAH KHAIRAN
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah.
*1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi)
*2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59
Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"*
Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"*
3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
Happy Husband Happy Life!
Happy Allah, Happy Life! Inshallah
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said:
Zayd ibn Thaabit RA said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allaah, and he recited the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door”
[Yoosuf 12:25]
‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”
Behind every happy wife there is a miserable husband 🙂
@@stanislavalexandravich3216 Following your logic we can say that behind every happy husband there is a miserable wife. So which one will you sacrifice?
@@shannons6188 sister I woudnt make a comment like that. Yes it is true that when Allah is happy with his servant tjat is good for him but saying it like this seems kind of childish like that way you tali to a kid which is not appropriat for Allah. He is the mosz high our rabb the one deserving the most respect. Im not making a fatwa but I do not think this is right.
The best of you is the best among you to his family and I'm the best of my family (SCW)
My Allah show us the right path-- Ameen
yes we do n proud of doing so because it's a feminity thing n that's how Allah SW created us with such abilities.
Jazakallahu khayr.
The first question to ask any liberal or feminist is whether she wants to choose her religion or her career.
Pray you're 5 daily salaah, fast in the month of ramadaan, don't allow a strange man at his house and take care of the "HOUSEHOLD"....
OK sisters, you don't cook, you don't give intimacy, you don't clean the house, you want to work and earn for yourself, etc etc...so please tell me what is it that you supposed to do ?
Freeloading I guess🤣🤣
Sit at home put makeup take it off put on again and more for social media
May Allah guide us ameen
give her self to all man in the street while you provide and take care for her !
@@the.art.of.shadows please don’t shame women like that, women respect themselves. If a women doesn’t want to do these domestic jobs then she can work and earn money. Simple
@@Hi-nl1mr then she should stop manipulating Shari'a.
Sometimes, she has to have a back up option, which is a job. Let's say a convert woman that isn't accepted by her family gets married, stops working, gives it all, but she gets divorced after some years of marriage for whatever reason. She did not work and she has little to nothing. What is she gonna do? Live on the streets after the 3 months pass until she can find a husband?
The community can help. I also dont think parents would never accept their daughter back. Also there are institutions for jobs its not that hard to find one tbh if your not picky
Who are these sisters that refuse to cook for their husbands? I feel like people are exaggerating honestly bc I can't begin to imagine a woman so petty that she cooks to feed herself and doesn't at least make an extra portion for her husband. These conversations seem to exist in the realms of RUclips comment sections and gender wars.
@Chadjeet Fuqsdeep there are many benefits of marriage. If you have no need for it there is no fault on you if you stay single. Wa alaikum as salaam.
@Chadjeet Fuqsdeep better food. AND sounds like you never had a real women that you don’t understand what a women can REALLY bring to the table. Men lack a lot and only a women can complete him. The women you’re thinking of who has too many demands of worldly things then she is gonna be a good wife. Look for the one who has Deen that the one who the Prophet alayhi salaatu wa salaam advices out of beauty and wealth or linage. A righteous wife would be good.
@Chadjeet Fuqsdeep People like you complain about their daddies not coming back from the grocery store.
@@lilies8964 oh no bruh why you have to do him like that 😂😂😂😂😂
the funny thing is that they do everything for their boss, some women even go so far as to perform sexual acts with the manager. but when it comes to the man who is the gateway to paradise, then all of a sudden liberal feminist ideas come to the fore.
If early Muslim men did cooking and other housekeeping tasks, then how can you expect them to go out and fight or cultivate or earn, or do dawah?
It does not make sense, even in today's time with all the modern day conveniences it takes time to cook and clean.
Should men sit back? No! They need to be providers.
Btw, they make better chefs. :D
Salam alaykum everyone. Thank you dear brother for defending what Sunna says about the role of the woman in the home. I would like to take a step back and elaborate on another point that causes the women to not want to cook and clean. Like you said, it all has to do with context. In my opinion, women are using the views of the liberals to express something else that is bothering them. In my opinion, not wanting to cook and clean is an cover-up expression of an unmet need and it is the unmet need that I would like you to address more because if we can identify what is bothering us at an emotional level and it is solved, we will have no problem cooking and cleaning for our husband.
In my previous mariage, I realised that I was not getting enough validation of my husband's love for me, not because they were non existant but because we didn't show love in the same way (a book that speaks about this and that I highly recommend is : "the 5 languages of love" by Gary Chapmann). This led me to frustration and not having the energy to do housechores (also because I'm not the sort of person who show's my love by doing acts of service). But at the start of the mariage, I was fine with housechores because my love tank was full.
If a woman is already bitter about something, she will more likely accept any "evidence" that comforts her state. If she has lost her bond with Allah, this will be even more difficult for her because she will have lost al furqan (the ability to distinguish good behavior that is pleasing to Allah from bad behavior detested from Allah) I wouls like us to explore more about the reasons for our bitterness and question our relationship to Allah. This is a reminder I do for myself first of all. We are all human and Allah accepts the repentance of the sincere believing man and woman. May Allah helps us stay on sirat al moustaqim (the straight path). Amin.
Most Asian women cooks nd clean do all the house work .
Ameen to your conclusion, Brother Gabriel! Jazak Allah khair.
Truth can't reason with feminism. Fairness can't meet pride.
Great video
It’s a woman’s job to cook and clean but that doesn’t mean a man cannot help out or cook for her when he chooses to.
Perfectly said
@Chadjeet Fuqsdeep That is correct too
If he provides and takes care of the rest you're in no place requiring this from him.
@Chadjeet Fuqsdeep She needs his permission to work outside.
The women need to obey their husbands. This is mentioned both in Qur'an and sunnah.
*1)* When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked which woman was the best, he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding his person or property doing anything of which he disapproves" ( At Tirmidhi, An Nasaa'i & Al-Bayhaqi)
*2)* "O you who have believed, obey Allah and obey the Messenger and *those in authority among you."* Sura Nisa verse 59
Men are the authority in the house and authority/guardian of their wives. The Noble Prophet Pbuh said *"The man is the shepherd of the people of his house"*
Also in *Sura Nisa 34 it's said "if they (women) obey you, seek no means against them"*
3)Ibn Maajah (1853) and al-Bayhaqi (14711) narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu‘aadh ibn Jabal came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), who said, “What is this, O Mu‘aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said, *“Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”*
Aslam-u-Alikum
Will the Shaikh or any brother provide the reference of the Hadith of Asma bint Yazid. I shall be grateful
Salāmu alaykum brother. Baraku Allāhu fik. I have a request.
I would appreciate if you addressed the men in your next topic who are abusive and arrogant towards their wife. Who care not for their kids or wife or even not work/pray/ or even addicted to alcohol.
It boils my brain to see sisters being oppressed and this is widespread.
And link: the husbands that expect the rights who are married to good women but don’t give them their rights.
What kind of quality of kids can she raise with husband like that and so what kind of generation of Ummah will rise if households are like that.
I think just as how important a man/father is if he lacks and is not a good man and abusive how detrimental that would be verse if a women was a bad woman. And that the reason a man has a high level is that how damaging it could be if he wasn’t fulfilling his rights. We know women are if not the most greatest fitna in the world but where are their men? That the men have become de’uses. The men are the head but if they loose it I.enjoy fulfilling their rights then the society would break up.
I’m not those modern women but a genuine request that you grill them and hold them to account because majority of the women are suffering. Baraku Allāhu fik for your efforts.
I agree let’s here it too.
@@ik5441you are right about checking and the opposite can be given as a spouse. A Somali proverb is : marriage is like a a dark room(you enter). I.e. you see the room has a nice door, nice building etc but once you enter you don’t know what you’ll find. And this regardless of who you picked( pious or not).
May Allah forgive and protect all Muslims dead or alive and grant us jannah by His mercy Aameen yaa Rabb
Let’s share the reward together few seconds great reward in sha Allah:)
Al-Qur’an is the greatest dhikr🌳❤️🥰
Subhan’Allah🌳❤️
Alhamdu lillah🌳❤️
Laa ilaaha illaa Allah🌳❤️
Allahu Akbar🌳❤️
Laa hawla wa laa quwwata illaa billah🌳❤️
Astagfirullah wa atuubu ilaihi🌳❤️
Subhan’Allahi wa bihamdihi Subhan’Allahil Azweem🌳❤️
May peace and blessings of Allah be upon our beloved prophet his companions and entire household🌳❤️
Yaa Allah whoever read these Azkar guide and grant them jannah without judgment or punishment Allahumma Aameen🤲🏼❤️
Jazakallah khair very good points both for men and women! We are Muslims and we have to follow Quran and Sunnah no buts and ifs about it ✌️
..when discussion about what to do in your life, with your best friend ever(wife/husband), become a topic for public consensus, you know society is rotten to the core..
True. It's been vilified by the dominant value system now.
Let the wife work and have her career, pay for a maid or take food from outside, the west is full of halal restaurants, it could be also a way to help our brothers who run their halal restaurants or fast food spots. Do this so you can rest and get intimacy on your off days. Muslim women have jobs, education, friends, hobbies… we don’t live just for you and I’m happy that it’s this way! You know why? Because I’ve seen those type of women who do nothing but cooking and cleaning getting treated like maids, the husbands don’t have conversations with them because there’s nothing to talk about since all her days are the same at home. I believe that respect is more important than anything in the world and if you think that women who work will cheat on their husbands etc I’ll gladly tell you that chatrooms in Arab countries are full of married women who are online all the time chatting with strangers because they’re bored in the house. Salam!
Who cares what you think. Shariah decides what is right or wrong in family relationships not our desires.
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Please, share this video. So much corruption from the modern muslim sisters, and I am too worried for my future marriage. I dont wanna deal with a wife who's gonna become stubborn and disobedient. I just want Allah to bless me with a wife who is content being at home and doing house duties whilst I work and provide. Please ya Allah
what is the point of the man having a wife around the house , just to put a roof over her head and clothe her. And she does not have to do anything. This is why some people talk about what she brings on the table. And many women hate hearing men ask that
This is completely unAmerican. What could a Muslim man expect here? and expecting a woman to ask her man for permission? May 200 years ago, but that ship sailed into history a while ago. Now the roles are reversed and most men don't notice or care. Some even support it.
جزاك الله خيرا
An eye opener for Muslim brothers and sisters.
A Noob summary:
Yes. Women need to cook and clean for their house as they are the shepherds of their homes. That is, unless they are also having Jobs to begin with. In that case, both of you have to equalize it. But then, this is not the ideal islamic situation which the Quran and sunnah establishes. The ideal Islamic situation is for the man to handle financial responsibility, whereas the woman handles the responsibility of the home. If the woman starts working like a man does, then the woman will not be able to fullfill her ideal islamic responsibility which Islam has established for her. So, yes. Serving the household is indeed a woman's responsibility, and there are no ifs and buts in it. But a man should also help the home from time to time. But this does not mean a MAN should only do so, but the main person responsible for the home specifically is the woman.
References:
Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: I heard the Messenger (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) say: "All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd, a man is the shepherd over his family and a woman is the shepherd over her husband’s house and his children. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd." In another wording: ''All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his herd. A man is the shepherd over his family and is responsible for his herd. A woman is the shepherd over the house of her husband and is responsible for her herd. A servant is the shepherd over the wealth of his master and is responsible for his herd. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd.''
Sahih/Authentic. - [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
Explanation
Everyone is entrusted with the protection and care of those under him, and will be held accountable for them. For instance, a ruler will be asked about his subjects on the Day of Judgment. Likewise, a man is responsible for his family, and he should command them to obey Allah, forbid them to disobey Him, and fulfill their due rights. He will be asked about these duties on the Day of Judgment. Also, a woman is responsible for keeping her husband’s house and for caring for the children, and she will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment. A servant is also a protector of his master’s wealth and will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgment. So everyone is invested with the responsibility of protecting those under their care and they will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment.
If you think you can bring out an argument that overlaps this one. Feel free to do so, but make sure to cite references rather than ignorantly stating your own desire coated opinion.
If satanic propagaters are untiring I wish more and more people like you are untiring aswell to fight all hidden evil, I pray for more people like you ,we all need to train our sons and daughter both about our religion only then we ll be able to fight false propaganda.If our generation doesn’t ve a strong religious base and education they will be easily manipulated by evil,
To be honest, this is the * best* video so far!
Masha Allah! With the proofs and excellent explanation!
But these women will still try to twist and add some caramel to it
Salam brother!
@@Azadbaran257 wa alaikum as salaam brother
Alhuma Barek Allah
Brother you speak the truth without any hesitation, it’s very rare to find content like this and Muslims like you, who has the guts to speak the honest truth.
Please continue with your works.
"convertible hijab" lmao
And "hump" hijab.
Women, are helpmates. If, you don’t want to be a helpmate to your husband, why even get married? Just say’in.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said:
Zayd ibn Thaabit RA said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allaah, and he recited the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door”
[Yoosuf 12:25]
‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”
@@jubairomar2676 In layman’s terms, what’s your point?
@Sammy Sammy My comment stands like a planted tree. Thanks.
the purpose of marriage is to avoid sin.
@@MrJazmine87 yea but like she said if you do nothing dont marry. If you dont do anythint your sinning as well
Should Men Provide & Protect?
Yes.
Men should provide and protect, and women should rear the children and take care her husband, and take care of the house.
@Rabya Ahmed Im not being a chauvinist, I simply asked a question. I simply want to see the reactions. Made too many assumptions. Of course men dont own there wife but is it too much to ask to just cook, clean, raise children and be a kind house-wife? Of course as long as the husband is bringing in enough money, there shouldnt be the need for the wife to work, if there isnt enough income then sure the wife can help but Im talking about a normal circumstance. Alot of Women these days even if there is enough money they still want to study and work, is it too much to ask to be a house-wife(again assuming the husband brings in enough money). Trust me the last thing I am is a chauvinist, I was raised by a single mother who did everything for me without a father.
@Rabya Ahmed women don’t even bother to marry a man who can’t support all of em
@Rabya Ahmed Rabya, I am a woman, but I don't sell being a housewife short, the role of a housewife is very important, why? Because they hold the nuclear family in tact. I am a child of the early seventies (49) I've seen children be left at home, while their parents worked, and this was the U.S., my Mom was (almost) the only housewife and my childhood friends used to be so jealous of me, my parents raised us well because they made us their priority, and those kids who used to be left at home... upon growing up had gotten in all sorts of trouble including substance abuse, sexual promiscuity, and even being incarcerated. So the decline of society has been prevalent since woman have been in the "workplace", (this was the agenda of the West, to make life unbearable and force women out of their homes),
I myself am married, been married for 31 years (Alhamdulilah) my husband sometimes struggles financially, we didn't live "extravagantly" I remained home and raised 6 kids, now four of my children are married with families of their own, my son doesn't want his wife to work and three of my daughters are also housewives, and they're not rich, with that being said I won't say that there are times woman need to help too (there are) and it doesn't mean that you're less than a good mother and wife, (I'm sure you're both), I'm not saying you can't be. I'm just putting it contextually, and Alhamdulilah our deen is for all ages, it's not only relevant to one time period in history, it's applicable in all times and our Prophet (PBUH) was adamant that a woman stayed homebound in support of her family.
Another good video
الحمدالله (الزواج محراب من محاريب العبادة )
If you look at 23:07 you will see that in Islam women are playing in the easy mode, while we men have it difficult and challenging.
Do you think majority of women choose to work?
After listening to this man speak disrespectfully about wives (“tight jeans”…), I say Alhumdulillah Islam came and:
1. Allah prohibited jaheleya of men to bury girl child… and
2. Allah gave wives rights and husbands responsibilities
3. Allah gave women right to marry or not (It’s not fard), and take a divorce/qulah as needed
4. Allah said to men he can marry four if he can treat his wives equally further advising men on taking one wife.
5. Allah made men financially responsible for his wife and children.
6. Allah said paradise is at the feet of mothers
7. Prophet said Allah could’ve made wives make sujood to their husbands BUT HE DID NOT. Why do you think Allah did not order that?
8. Allah told wives to obey their husbands as He gave husbands full responsibilities for his wife and their childrens. And Allah said, best among you is he who treat his wife the best.
Men want to marry doctors… professional women and want them to work. So now a days both husbands and wives work and so rest of the house chores have to be shared. And if the wife is stay at home then she can be expected to do 8 hours of housework as the husband is doing 8 hours at his job. But she needs rest just like he does. She is not a slave. She is a wife. She has to take care of herself too like he should. The roles of husband and wife is to be a comfort for each other not a burden or pain. Using kind words will help move mountains.
On topics that are gray or not clear in Islam, do not create fitna. If certain things are important for you in marriage have it written in the nikkah agreement. For example, if a husband wants his wife to not work or wants her to cook every day then talk about these things before marriage and write it in nikkah agreement. You can do that. If the woman or girl doesn’t want to cook or doesn’t want to work, have it written in nikkah agreement.
This video is not helpful in my opinion. Why place fuel in the fire!! We already have such a bad situation with Muslims not marrying or staying married. Let’s talk about solutions not problems. Boys want to play around instead of committing to marrying. Or we have those men who want to marry professionals and make the wife an atm machine. I can talk about these problems of Muslim men all day but I think it is better to talk kindly about our sisters and provide solutions. May Allah guide all of us and give us taufeeq to please Him alone, aameen.
Which is why Islam has established this lifestyle as the best one and the only one with the best of the best chances of success.
A man takes care of his family's financial issues, whereas the woman takes care of the home of her husband's home. Meaning, their children and his house, she is responsible to serve his house.
Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: I heard the Messenger (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) say: "All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd, a man is the shepherd over his family and a woman is the shepherd over her husband’s house and his children. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd." In another wording: ''All of you are shepherds and every one of you is responsible for his herd. A leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his herd. A man is the shepherd over his family and is responsible for his herd. A woman is the shepherd over the house of her husband and is responsible for her herd. A servant is the shepherd over the wealth of his master and is responsible for his herd. So all of you are shepherds, and every one of you is responsible for his herd.''
Explanation
Everyone is entrusted with the protection and care of those under him, and will be held accountable for them. For instance, a ruler will be asked about his subjects on the Day of Judgment. Likewise, a man is responsible for his family, and he should command them to obey Allah, forbid them to disobey Him, and fulfill their due rights. He will be asked about these duties on the Day of Judgment. Also, a woman is responsible for keeping her husband’s house and for caring for the children, and she will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment. A servant is also a protector of his master’s wealth and will be questioned about that on the Day of Judgment. So everyone is invested with the responsibility of protecting those under their care and they will be questioned about this on the Day of Judgment.
Yes women should cook and clean lol that’s common sense
Its really suprising to see that no1 disliked the video lmfao i mean look at the comment section its a complete warzone
This is 1 of the most wise English teacher speaker in the Islamic community that is why.
@@ummamanaah5064 nah bro thats not the reason there are shit ton of narcissistic feminist liberal clowns in comment section who would dislike the video because this brother speaks the truth as it is and their fragile ego cant handle the truth
Suggestion - if you're going to speak non-English, provide translation on the video.
I think when it comes to these topics, discuss this with the potential spouse! come to an agreement, I just think it's ridiculous people fight over this! sometimes as women, we're not able to do domestic work. Normal, your sick or whatever. People need to have some common sense, your husband works all day and provides for you and he comes home to no cooked meal and a filthy house! it's just diabolical. Unless you have many children and you need help get help. I don't understand what the issue is.
Understand in the hadith of the prophet it does not state helping it states busying serving his family if he is helping that means it is one person responsibility he is just doing it but that is what he used to do anytime he is in the house and when it is time for prayer he goes out.
Marriage is based on mutual understand and love mercy in islam not a power hungry race
Elaborate please!
Hahaha.. are you sane?
But Gabriel understand that not all women want to go out and do what you are saying the house keeping responsibility is both on husband and wife shari'ah does not dictate it.
Brother Gabriel I see that one my comments I wrote on here, which was pretty innocuous, was removed...I just want to know why?
@@frabgas27 Thank you for letting me know, because I felt kind of bad.
Women should choose a profession that will benefit the women and children of the ummah and which they can balance between their OBLIGATIONS of their family (HUSBAND).... KALAAS
She should be a BOSS BABE CEO ! Yeaaah !
@@artarak497 hilarious
@@artarak497 and what will u be, sisi boy?
They should stay home
That's better for.them
@@Dada-yf1hg husband should fulfill his responsibility
Women should cook and clean that is her responsibility
Fatwa shopping or shaykh shopping..... 😆
You sound pressed. Cry over it.
@@Deaxon1 u understand or u don't. Wisdom and experience comes with time.... u either have it or don't..... pressed, nope..... I'm just taking the opportunity to express here (although not the best of platforms) as this topic is vast.....
@@imeeeemi6929 Ibn Hibbaan narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman prays her five (daily prayers), fasts her month (Ramadaan), guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be said to her: ‘Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.’” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 660.
@@imeeeemi6929 key word “obey her husband”. What you have to obey? Study it in fiqh. Nothing excessive. Did that hadith help at all?
@@Deaxon1 yes it helps..... and i haven't studied but i can the interpretation from a shaykh of authority...... and unfortunately, many are milkshaykhs now
Parameters of Obedience to husband
1. Sex when he requests (taking condition of wife into account)
2. Not given charity (his money) except with his permission
3. Not leaving home except with his permission
4. Not to fast nafl w/out his permission/knowledge
5. Do not allow anyone in the house unless it’s someone he approves of
Outside of these five, obedience is not mandatory on a wife.
Let's rather listen to what a knowledgeable guy says
Also it's not an 'obligation' of a husband to give her gifts
It's not his obligations to but her nice things
But ALL husbands do these EXTRA things, why? Because
1) they love their wife
2) Marriage won't flourish if it's a rights transaction
It will only flourish if BOTH HUSBAND AND WIFE do extra!
And if a husband doesn't do extra Things, his wife will probably say he is oppressive, this and that even tho he fulfilled his obligations! But she will leave him because she cherry picks
You expect gifts, romantic things from him, then cook and clean
Then it's fair
Give favours, get favours
It's a two way street
General obedience is mandatory!
@@aatif7518 Not it is not. Also my points above are gathered from sound, Islamic sources. To your points about doing extra, yes, the operative word is extra. I agree that in a loving marriage, these things should be done. But in Islam, when discussing rights and obligations, that is a different matter. Meaning, she is not committing a sin according to Islam if she refuses to do them, or she wants to have a conversation and discuss it and come to some sort of mutual agreement.
@@deedeee6271 if she refuses to do them
Husband would get angry
Like the same say, if a husband refuses to buy something nice a wife asks, she will get sad, she will get a bad mood
But is the husband sinning? No
Can the wife ask for divorce? No
(But the woman will ask saying he is cruel)
@@deedeee6271 provide your proofs
GOOD MIC. KEEP IT UP
In todays society ppl are losing their roles and responsibilities as men and women. If he provides , takes care of you physically, emotionally and mentally, cultivates you and puts a roof over your head taking care of his needs and his household is the least you can do as his wife .... if he lacks in something encourage him to do better but don't do less or deny him things to discipline him...
our aim should be to be the best version of ourselves at all times regardless of how the other half is behaving.... compete and out do each other in love and sunnah not pettiness subhanallah ...
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said:
Zayd ibn Thaabit RA said: The husband is the master (sayyid) according to the Book of Allaah, and he recited the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“They both found her lord [sayyid] (i.e. her husband) at the door”
[Yoosuf 12:25]
‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: “Marriage is slavery, so be careful with regard to whom you give your daughter for enslavement.” In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are prisoners with you.”
I don't have a problem with "obeying" or any other part of the deen that emphasises men being leaders over women.... I don't know what part of my comment made you leave 2 comments about "obeying a husband" was there something that triggered you ??
Let him copy and paste then I'm not really bothered with anything he said it just felt random lol
@@summerflower4058 you're replying under the assumption that just because I posted comments here I must be opposing you. There are other options you know, maybe, you can take heed from. Like backing you up with facts from Qur'an and sahih hadiths (which I actually did, btw)
I thought you were one of those feminist hunters lol and I'm far from that . Anyways Jazakallah to both of you my brothers our thoughts were aligned and thats all that matters.
Just because I speak for the haqq I'm a feminist! When I speak pro polygany it's 'way to go sister' from the brothers, but when I speak about the treatment of sisters in the home according to the sunna I'm a feminist. 'I asked `Aisha what did the Prophet (peace be upon him) use to do at home. She replied. "He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer."
حَدَّثَنَا حَفْصُ بْنُ عُمَرَ، حَدَّثَنَا شُعْبَةُ، عَنِ الْحَكَمِ، عَنْ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، عَنِ الأَسْوَدِ، قَالَ سَأَلْتُ عَائِشَةَ مَا كَانَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَصْنَعُ فِي أَهْلِهِ قَالَتْ كَانَ فِي مِهْنَةِ أَهْلِهِ، فَإِذَا حَضَرَتِ الصَّلاَةُ قَامَ إِلَى الصَّلاَةِ.
Reference : Sahih al-Bukhari 6039
In-book reference : Book 78, Hadith 69
USC-MSA web (English) reference : Vol. 8, Book 73, Hadith 65
"Havining some milk or something"
What is the name of the book by Eman Douglas please?
"A well-guarded treasure" by Iman Daglas
Jazàkallahu khairan
@@shufaaally777 thanks
I think it depends on a husband's financial circumstances though and the available of cheap labour
I read somewhere and will appreciate if anyone can confirm .... the mother of girl baby has half the quantity of milk to that of the mother of a boy baby..... makes sense, girls are soft, fragile, etc whilst a boy needs more milk and grows stronger, etc
Sorry never heard
@@fatumaadam3067 but it makes sense any ways.....
I doubt it, they need the same amount of calories at that age regardless of gender
I ain’t going to cook or clean for no one lmao not my job it’s the mans job to do that 😁
Oh brace yourselves this is about to get interesting lmfao 😉😉🤣🤣🤣
Min 11.35: It was Ibn Abbas not Ibn Omar.
Ibn Abbās said, (I fear that) stones will soon rain down upon you from the skylI say, "The Messenger of Allāh () said;" and you say, “Abū Bakr and Umar said!"
1 This narration is quoted in numerous works of ibn Taymiyyah such as Majmoo’ Al-Fatăwā, vol. 20, pp. 215, 251, vol. 26, pp. 50, 281. It is also mentioned in numerous works of ibn al-Qayyim such as Zád al-Ma'äd, vol. 2, pg, 195.
Ahmad #3121 and Bazzār #5052 record it with the words, I think that you are soon to perish! I say, "The Prophet () said," and he says, “But Abū Bakr and Umar proscribed it!" Ibn Muflih, a-Adāb al-Shariyab, vol. 2, pg, 74 said that it was hasan.
Ibn Abdul-Barr, Jämi Bayān al Ilm, vol. 2, pg, 1209 records it with the words, By Allāh, I do not think you will stop until Allāh punishes you! We narrated to you the words of the Messenger of Allāh () and you narrate to us the words of Abū Bakr and Umar!' The isnād is şahih. Tabarānī, alAwsat #21 with the words, Woe to you! In your view, do (Abū Bakr and Umar) come before what is in the Book of Allah and what the Messenger of Allah () legislated for his Companions and his nation? Haythamī, vol. 3, pg, 234 said the isnād was hasan.
Be good to do follow up shortened 10 min video. Summarising directly the issue
Was it really ibn umar who said قال الله و قال رسول or another sahabi
If the men were real men lots of problem would not happen. Some men wants to put the financial burden on women otherwise throw tantrum and women bcs of kids tolerate lots of things.
Assalamoualeikoum," She's a revert".
I know! Every one is born a muslim inshallah
What's the book's name ?
A well-guarded treasure
@@InternationalGamingkinggamer jazak Allahu khayran
@@afraas7176 wa iyyakum
The husband should at least clean up after himself, iron his own clothes ie like the Prophet mended his own socks.
He won't have to. Because his wife will do it for him.
Maybe when the mother is like Khadijah. She must obey him and make the house a place of peace for him. so when he tells the wife to do everything she obeys immediately with no arguments and is happy. So she should by default do everything in the house. Like cook, clean, do the laundry etc (btw this is her duty in marriage but feminists are complaining). A woman should serve her husband without expecting anything from him.
Then maybe because the man is so stress free he will be willing to help or do things on his own from the goodness of his heart. This will definitely increase the love between the spouse whether he helps or doesn't because he will be able to appreciate his wife more.
@@didafm oh so follow British colonial rule rather that what the Prophet, peace be upon him, did?
@@shadowstorm5261 without expecting anything from him? You mean you want the sisters to abide by Islam but not the brothers? So when the Prophet, peace be upon him, mended his own shoes, and helped is wives around the house you don't want to follow that? This is why our sisters have gone towards feminism. You have a British Colonialist mind, not the mind of Rasul. Have you forgotten the Khalifs that went to the house of the old blind woman; cleaned, and cooked for her every day? They didn't send their wives. You seem to have forgotten the sadaqa to give to your wives; you think that they are only servants for you. Don't you know that a husband who helps his wife will earn more respect and love from her? Do you want to be in the house all day every day dealing with the children? Wow, there is just no wanting to work together. It's all about you, you, you.
@@alliyahsgalaxy the wife shouldn't ask anything like dish washer, vacations by planes, TV smartphones as all these weren't there during the era of prophet Muhammad saw
Did he just correlate every career working women to someone who wears pants, freely mixes with men, wears "Convertible hijabs", and puts lipstick on. like how do you seriously think that is an okay statement to make? Just say you want women to stay at home and do nothing but take care of you if thats what you want. Don't however rope in amazing women, who are both great moms and career women ( doctors, teachers, counselors etc.) and are also religious and uphold their duties. Don't belittle women to either staying at home or becoming deviant kufaars as soon as they start thinking of contributing to society. There is a world you are ignoring in which muslim couples share duties (household, finances or otherwise, however they please) and both grant the islamic rights upon each other. It seems like you have a deep hate for any career seeking women (given by the fact that you keep tying that to deviance), so hopefully you can rid your heart of all that extremism. Cooking and cleaning is such a basic skill that everyone should know and complete. People can share the duties depending on who works more and less, there shouldn't be much debate after that.
Very well said dear friend
I mean of course he hates it because I’m the west they allow for free mixing and promote the woman beautifying herself in public. Causes for great fitnah not only between the couple but in her so called “job” unless if she’s some doctor.
Stop with your "exceptions" ! 95% fit the description so he has the right to generelise
First off, realize that Islam isn't something to be managed with everything else. If you believe it to be true, Islam comes first (in how you live your life) and then you can fill your time with whatever else. Second, your idea of being a career woman and equating that to the only way (implied) to contribute to society is without merit. Child rearing is an equally important part of society and should be focused on more. Just because the Western view equates labor that is exchanged for money as the only kind of "valuable" or "productive" labor doesn't mean we have to. All labor is equally strenuous and deserves appreciation. Mothers/wives who dedicate their time to the care of children and the home should be valued more because that is more selfless then being a career women (emphasis on career. Women who have to work have to work. No judgement on them) will ever be. On your point of couples balancing out responsibility, to assume that they juggle between roles is again something you should think about. Roles are set early on in the relationship and changing them drastically effects the relationship (this isn't a sitcom) or it could lead to destabilising the quality of life for the children. Lastly, no one says a woman shouldn't be a doctor or whatever else she wants but in the context of marriage her role is to the children and the home. Anything else she does is secondary. If it becomes difficult then that is what is dropped (unless there's a need for it then the couple can work it out between themselves). Wives who value work more than their role (career women) can't be thought of as performing their religious duties (it's not just Salah and fasting) similar to a husband who doesn't provide for his family in everything. And it is advised to them to stop because it may compromise their primary duty. Cooking for someone who's been out all day is a kindness. It should be done with that intent and it should be something the husband appreciates.
@@junaid2266 I said they could be both. Never did I say being a career woman was the *only* way to contribute to Society. My question is why do they have to choose? They can do both, it’s belittling to say you can only do one. Like for gods sake our beloved prophets wife was a business woman and she still had children, however Khadija( RA) had a supportive husband who not only helped her with her career ( worked for her) but also helped around the house. I am an aspiring pre-health student. I will not only help heal people with the knowledge I will inshallah have but will also raise Amazing children bidniallahi tacalaa. My spouse *will* help me around the house. Point. Blank. Period. If that makes me a crazy lunatic feminist then that’s you’re opinion. He’s sole responsibility isn’t just finances. That is how many men get away with being absent fathers, when you teach young men that their only responsibility is earning money, and the rest of the families duties lie on the mother. Now to your point of roles being changed, that’s not what I said. I meant each couple will do what’s best for them, i.e they will decide on that @ the beginning of their marriage. Who are we to dictate what a couple decides to do with their kitchen and living room??? If they both decide to share household duties as in * I’m responsible to take out the trash, bring kids home from school, teach my kids Sunday school, and you’re in charge of this this and that* what is so wrong with that?
Convertible hijabs
They should ESPECIALLY if husband asks
End of story
After all he is the one bringing money not the pet cat
A woman cooking for her husband today, is much more difficult than it was 30 years ago, and even more harder than it was 100 years ago. We have to take into account what's changed around us and how life is nowadays. Especially if living in the west. Not absolving women from their duties, but are we taking this into account?
How with all this new technological advancements cooking today is easier then it was 100 years ago?
Today you have everything you need to cook easily available in nearby stores so will you kindly tell me how it is harder today than it was 100 years ago?
Lol
It's easier today
Before you need to heat the coal, burn firewood, have less equipments
Today, you got stove, dishwasher, taps with clean fast water, cookers,ovens, washing machines, etc
@@akhlaqansari8628 Ok
Lol the system .. is broken
Yes wives should do their job, plus when we have older kids they should be taught responsibilities & they can help the wife with these duties. It’s not that hard to cook, clean & have sex lol what’s the big deal ladies?? I am a women btw
Ha 😅
🤣🤣🤣🤣exactly. BUT people need to look at the wisdom. People icl most men think it’s because they are supremely better(though they have a darajah). Rather the wisdom is soo many. Think about, if women refuse sex the man will go else where to get it haram way. If the men are supposed to be leaders and Mujahidiin, do you expect a his family to argue with him when he makes a certain decision. If a man refuses a particular person to come to their house a good women should try understand and not argue because the protection of his family is on him. If a man knows all day other men are talking about women in the work force imagine how it drives him mad when he knows his wife is out working. Trust me this problem is even faced by non Muslim men(the manly man).
That’s why in a Hadith that if a man sees a women who he feels to he should go home and have intamcy with his wife(in my own words)imagine if the wife said “I’m tired and rejected him and his desperate” unless he fears Allāh he’ll definitely go towards a haram path. And when he wants another wife because of her lack of intimacy she’ll have a problem. And most marry behind her back which unfortunately is a problem too. If I was a man I would def marry an introvert it’s usually extraverts that can’t stand being indoors. I think those women are not satisfied with their husbands otherwise should of stayed single. If she was comfortable with him she would know that works comes 1st just as he is out working and that she can have her fun and intellectual conversation when he comes home. And a man should make his wife to feel proud that she was at home all day probably starving for a adult conversation, cleaning after a kids all day with all their “mommy every 2sec), cooking should be a big deal although when you have many kids(or even the 2nd) can be tricky.
Isn’t it easier for us to be at home and be in charge than be under a boss. Have your own tea breaks, dress comfortable than be uncomfortable and tired while making money for someone else? Come on sisters be honest to yourselves. Stay single if you don’t want to build a family and it’s only about intamacy for you, don’t annoy your brothers. Don’t follow the kufar women, by Allāh they are the oppressed fools. They are not in charge of anything and infact middle class or upper I should say and rich ones kids are most messed up because they have no one to come home to and some parents would travel abroad for work. Support your husband against other men and men respect your women when you come home and don’t think it’s only she has to pity your hard work, I think a mother’s work is nearly as hard as yours(those who have tough jobs such as leadership) it’s not easy being a mother(she wasn’t chosen 3tms over you just for labour). And communicate.
Infact, choose wisely both of you!!!
Btw a female too.
Do you have small children? I don't think so. You would be talking differently. When you don't have time to even go to toilet, then yes, it's freaking problem to do all those things.
@@alghurraba Then how did women do it 100s to 1000s of years ago?
@@alghurraba This is a great question because I actually have 6 kids Alhumdillah & 3 under 7 ☺️ the first 3 I had back to back. So yes you can!
Sheikh women need help....when having large families.
People here obviously live outside reality, never been married and do not have idea what they are parroting about.
Do you even have idea how hard it is, to cook and clean while taking care all day for small baby/babies? I have 4 months old child (that does not take long naps during day, only 10 minutes) and beside being up half of the night, and taking care of her all day long, from which my back hurts horribly, I don't have time to cook and clean. My husband helps me. He sees how hard it is, and he doesn't have that much evil in him like people here, who have guts to require food and clean house from an overworked woman. I'm writing this at 4 AM, while taking care of my baby, while my husband is sleeping.
Exceptions don't make the rule. Most babies sleep for hours.
Typically a baby sleeps like 11-14 hours a day.
This is plenty of time to do other things, while observing your kid on a baby monitor or something
Correct
Exceptions don't change the rulings
@Zik Zak so the man comes home and wants to relax. When will the woman relax? If mam wants good looking wife and food and good mood in home, he must take care of babies himself after coming from work.
@@alghurraba Being a mother and being a wife are two separate things. You can be divorced and still be a mother.
@@alghurraba There are a few hadiths with regards to the child showing love and allegiance to the mother over the father thrice before the fathers turn. This emphasises on the fact that due to the sacrifices of the mother she has earned the gold, silver and bronze medal. Father gets the constellation prize. You don't get this without working for it.
Secondly as the popular hadith goes, jannah is under the feet of the mother.
The sacrifices you are making now for your babies is the reason jannah is under your feet, you do not earn such a status as jannah being under your feet by doing nothing or complaining. This status isn't easy to achieve.
My advice to you would be to persevere and realise that the status you have as a mother in Islam is honoured and respected for these very struggles you are facing. It doesn't come easy. The more you complain about it the more you detract from the rewards.
I'm sure your husband would help if he could. But the reality is that the main carer of the babies is the mother and the husband does what he can to make it easy for his wife.
The husband also makes many sacrifices during this time as well. Don't get it twisted.