Personal Hygiene For Autistic Women
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- Опубликовано: 14 июл 2024
- As always I'm using terms like women and girls and so on super loosely, relate to the bits you relate to and ignore the rest! That's assuming anyone relates to any of this, which I hope you do!
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Wearing makeup is really bad with my senses. It has a particular odour which always gives me a headache. And I’m completely with you on the nonsense which is hair removal! What a waste of time 🙄
I always remember a line from the sitcom "3rd Rock From the Sun" in which I think Kristen Johnston's character asks one of the males "why is my body much higher maintenance than yours?" A comic line but also a true one when you think of the amount of money, time and often discomfort women and girls go through so they can "look good". Those who want to opt out of it are often shamed, including by other females. Leaving aside all the efforts to cultivate a "feminine" image there is the unavoidable business of periods and the possibility of getting pregnant. Certainly females can get pleasure out of all these things (maybe not periods!) but there are plenty of challenges.
Hugely relate to the nail biting and your description of your own nails as 'disgusting' and 'horrendous'.
My nails are my #1 insecurity. Very embarrassing but I've never been able to stop biting.
I think It was one of the only stims I was able to use in public (esp school) as a kid and now it's dug into my body/mind so deeply.
Thank you for this last couple of videos but especially this one. Personally I can’t stand makeup, it’s sensory hell. I will tolerate many things but I can’t stand that, no matter what imperfections it could cover.
I have however recently been thinking about the hell that is hair removal. Not randomly, I have a smear test booked for next week and I am aware that many people remove all body hair and I didn’t know how much to remove to be considered acceptable. I obviously know to shower close to my appointment but I have been worried about being seen as ‘normal’. You have reminded me to just be myself and I’m autistic and dealing with enough without making an unpleasant sensory experience even worse by worrying about stuff I shouldn’t worry about. This video was timed really well for me as I was genuinely worried. Whereas now I’m just not looking forward to the appointment.
You were brave enough to say a lot of things similar to how I feel but felt alone about. I genuinely hope you don’t get any unkind comments about your personal hygiene as you deserve great credit for your courage in being so open in covering difficult topics.
Another amazing video Dana 😊 I love that you have the courage to say what I'm very often thinking! And no doubt what a lot of us are thinking too. It's a difficult topic and I don't tell anyone in my life about it because it's humiliating, so it makes me quite 'secretive', which sucks. I reckon A LOT of people feel this way and wouldn't wanna talk about it, so Thankyou once again for being the one to speak about it!
The sensory hell of that transition to baths and showers is SO difficult and there is a hell of a lot to it like you say. It takes me hours for baths and people would despair with me for my long showers too.
I have Body Dismorphic Disorder as a lovely little add-on to all my other mental health bs and ASD, so when I do my hair and makeup it HAS to be perfect and I HAVE to do it every single time I leave the house or have to see anyone. It's an absolutely debilitating amount of effort and I'm still in burnout so forever running on empty. It literally takes me hours to get ready to leave the house, and there are millions of reasons why I hate leaving the house as is.
The hair removal thing has caused me so much stress over my life, I've actually really wished I was a guy "If I have to exist at all" so many times. I once asked for the Phillips Lumea (IPL hair removal like the 'Nono', probably butchered the spelling) and it was NOT cheap. This would've been maybe about 12 years ago, and I couldn't even deal with the very quick flash of light on my skin because it came with a bit of heat and I can't do hot things. I became literally scared of it because I used to describe it like having a match put out on my leg, even though I knew it wasn't that hot. I have the hypersensitivity and have a lot of fear and issues around temperature etc, so I had no choice but to SELL THIS EXPENSIVE AF GIFT from my lovely mom that I'd practically begged for as a young teen. She understood and wasn't mad despite us having so little money bless her, but once again it left me wondering why it was one of many things I couldn't just handle like everyone else.
As for periods, I take the mini pill now as the normal one was triggering migraine attacks, and this mini pill happens to have stopped my periods. I didn't like that initially because I used to bother with relationships so I stupidly used to rely on my periods to reassure me I wasn't pregnant 🤦🏻♀️😒 As that would be my absolute worst nightmare. But my periods, whilst they were generally light and didn't have terrible pains, it was always emotionally I'd suffer! I'd be a spiralling depressive mess! I'm already quite emotionally disregulated and I feel TOO much anyway, so I don't miss the intense mood disruption of periods. Nowadays I fully appreciate not having periods and always hope it stays that way 😅
Anyway, rambling again. Point is, I once again agree with everything and I've watched part 1 aswell. You're basically another me in so many ways and I didn't know that existed so 🤣 thankyou.
Side note, then I'll stfu 😂 - As I requested your PIP video a while back (and loved the video as I knew I would), I just thought I'd let ya know I'm heading in the direction of the tribunal stage, so fingers crossed they get their shit together and help a b!tch out 🙃😅 Thankyou again Dana. Wishing the best of health and happiness to you, your family and your furbaby family 😺
I literally refuse to wear makeup for several years now. I mean, if it is ok for a man to NOT paint his face, why shouldn’t it be ok for a woman? It’s not that we women are naturally uglier than men and so have to hide our faces under paint while for men it is socially acceptable to just show their face as it is! And: I don’t need people to believe that I’m more beautiful than I actually am. And: I’m not here to decorate other people’s world. End of the rant. Thanks for the video, Dana 😊
I watched to the end! Thank you for making this! I understand all of your points. I do many of the things you named. Don’t shave my arm pits unless I feel like it, only shave the visible part of my legs. I wash my face in the shower, which is the sum and total of my skin care routine. I only wear make up about once a week and never remember to take it off properly.
I went for short hair ever since highschool because I found long hair soooo hard to maintain and style to societal standards, and I HATE the way it feels when it's touching my face and shoulders.
Right now I'm growing it long because id like to try long hair at least once in my life. I have to keep it in a braid otherwise I deal with all the same problems and frustration as when I was a kid!
PS. awesome video. Thank you for talking about this.
Hello. I'm an autistic woman too and one of my interests is skincare and makeup. If you want to know anything specific feel free to ask me. Even if I don't know the answer I'd love to research it and find out. I also have sensory issues ofc so I've found products that don't exacerbate that.
I hate shaving and wearing makeup, I hate doing my hair too!
I think you are beautiful without makeup!! Thank you for your perspective, I love the way you talk. This was helpful for me to understand my teenage daughter who I believe might be being bullied. She won't tell me if she is. She won't let me help her.. any tips for me on how I can help her?
Aw thank you! Personally I quite often kept bullying from my parents because I was embarrassed, both that it was happening and by the things that were being said and done to me, I obviously can’t say if it’s the same situation with your daughter, but that was my experience and I think I’d have really benefited from someone asking about it and specifying I didn’t need to tell them details, or even just a chat with confirmation that bullies are always out there and often choose victims purely because they can, not because there’s actually anything wrong with the person being bullied, and that they’re not weak for having it happen to them!
Beyond that, having people that try to love and support you is the most vitally important thing to have as a teen anyway, never mind one being bullied, and it sounds like she’s sorted in that department! 💕
@@DanaAndersen you are one amazing and smart person!!! I was bullied too and I agree they do it just because they can and a lot of times it's led by jealousy. You have a beautiful light about you and I'm so happy you didn't allow them to dim it!! Keep shining beautiful🌟. Thanks for responding!!! I tried sharing my story with her and she still says she's not being bullied. So I will trust her and be there for her as much as possible 😁 sending you lots of love💕
Skincare took me so long to figure out. I’m 25 and I just learned how to stop having dry flakey skin on my face. It was so embarrassing so I watched so many videos to try and figure it out 😑
Have you tried reusable period pads? I like them, though my flow is not heavy
I use them too, they're a game changer!