Hank Tried to Kill Me With a Hammer

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  • Опубликовано: 28 окт 2024

Комментарии • 1 тыс.

  • @dennischiu272
    @dennischiu272 10 лет назад +458

    "Why did I have a hammer?!"
    -Hank Green, 2013

    • @onismbeloved
      @onismbeloved 9 лет назад +3

      What episode was that

    • @kierstinthorn
      @kierstinthorn 9 лет назад +1

      Yeah, what Mia said, haha.

    • @dennischiu272
      @dennischiu272 9 лет назад +5

      Kierstin Thorn​​ Well, I don't remember the exact name; it's the one where Hank is doing a Q&A with his parents. :)

    • @Ekvitarius
      @Ekvitarius 8 лет назад

      Which video was that in?

    • @dennischiu272
      @dennischiu272 8 лет назад +3

      +ÆKVITARIØS Hank's Q&A video with his parents.

  • @brwneyedgirlx19
    @brwneyedgirlx19 8 лет назад +227

    "Get thee to steak and shake!" Ah, I love falling down old vlogbrothers videos holes.

  • @Nanancay
    @Nanancay 10 лет назад +160

    ' Hank tried to murder me with a hammer'
    'You were very irritating'
    LOOOOOOOOOOOOL that wasn't a direct quote but your mum made me laugh

  • @theleafthinker3383
    @theleafthinker3383 8 лет назад +126

    John admitted that he loves Hank, and it's not even Esther Day. Wow, what a world.

  • @joshuasims5421
    @joshuasims5421 6 лет назад +48

    Wait...John has crazy ideas and Hank shoots them down? Every episode of Dear Hank and John establishes that today, this has reversed.

  • @pooquellec5223
    @pooquellec5223 11 лет назад +51

    I smothered him? That's not killing that's just hugging." XD 'Yup just hugging'

  • @s0m
    @s0m 16 лет назад +14

    Your mum is the best: "You were really irritating him".
    Bless parents for always letting us know our place in life.

  • @LtColOwnage
    @LtColOwnage 11 лет назад +85

    5 YEARS LATER IT BECOMES RELEVANT AGAIN.

    • @EggBastion
      @EggBastion 5 лет назад +5

      And now 5 years later again.

  • @sherylhosler9487
    @sherylhosler9487 9 лет назад +134

    Wow, your mom sounds like mine: "Well, you're the older sibling, so if the younger sibling tried to hurt you, it was only because you were instigating!"

  • @HoneySpecials
    @HoneySpecials 12 лет назад +23

    "He tried to kill me with a hammer!"
    "You were probably being irritating."
    Good point, Mama Green.

  • @trishmartin520
    @trishmartin520 10 лет назад +28

    I love you
    "All I ever did was spill red cough syrup on his bread spread and hug him too hard and somehow I'm the inferior sibling" 😂😂😂

  • @jamestown8398
    @jamestown8398 8 лет назад +45

    "The best way to get inspired to write is to buy 20 - 30 copies of each of my books."

  • @RockStarMae21
    @RockStarMae21 10 лет назад +35

    I picked this video because I thought the title said "Hank Tried To Kill Me With a Hamster"

  • @kat14kalvya
    @kat14kalvya 10 лет назад +88

    I am so behind with these. I feel bad having not found this before. I have only been a nerdfighter for a year...

    • @sgracesful
      @sgracesful 10 лет назад +8

      Don't feel to bad, I've only been a nerdfighter since March

    • @Sylvyi
      @Sylvyi 10 лет назад +10

      Don't feel bad, I've only been a nerdfighter since I read TFIOS like 3 weeks ago :)

    • @sarkasticchik9133
      @sarkasticchik9133 10 лет назад +8

      We are all in that boat. Or most of us, I always find new videos it makes happy :)

    • @flamingfuryforce4
      @flamingfuryforce4 10 лет назад +5

      I've only been a nerdfighter for about a month, when the girl I like told me about "the universe is weird": she doesn't like me, but I am still a nerdfighter!

    • @Jindorek
      @Jindorek 9 лет назад +3

      i'm just amazed that there are only 2 million of us. I mean there are 7 billion people on the planet. are you all spreading the word?

  • @rosecomedygold
    @rosecomedygold 8 лет назад +29

    That's not killing. That's hugging.

  • @jyjryu22799
    @jyjryu22799 7 лет назад +2

    Cant wait for them to look back on this video. One of my faves

  • @greeblygreebly
    @greeblygreebly 11 лет назад +11

    "You were really irritating him" LOL, that's such a mom thing to say.
    "What have I told you about driving your brother into a homicidal rage?"
    "Not on the bedspread."

  • @jokiaragon
    @jokiaragon 10 лет назад +49

    I tried to smother him- that's just hugging that's not killing" rotfl :D

  • @KabisCube
    @KabisCube 8 лет назад +11

    I just stumbled upon this older episode and had the "oh man he looks so much younger here!" reaction, then I looked in the mirror and realized that 8 years has passed since I saw this video last time.
    Lets just say I looked a lot younger 8 years ago as well.

  • @Kristina
    @Kristina 16 лет назад +10

    Oh wow, the new katherine's cover is very different... dont know what I think yet, need to see it in my hands I suppose. :)

  • @ksb0408
    @ksb0408 10 лет назад +3

    Oh, my goodness. It's great because so much had changed and yet many things are still the same. Like your voice.

  • @adamross2025
    @adamross2025 9 лет назад +31

    You spent four years on Looking For Alaska... Did you eventually find it?

    • @LifeofMarie267
      @LifeofMarie267 7 лет назад +8

      Adam Ross My dad saw me reading it and he told me what roads to take to Alaska. That's what happens when you are the daughter of a trucker...which I am.

  • @pipers_mom
    @pipers_mom 12 лет назад +5

    "I tried to smother him?...That's just hugging.That's not killing." HAHAHAHA

  • @vladtepes97
    @vladtepes97 8 лет назад +46

    the most tragic part of this video is not the news about attempted fratricide or the pamphlet larceny. the most tragic part of this video is the fact that mrs green didn't recognise her son's phone number and he had to identify himself.

    • @18SUNANDA
      @18SUNANDA 8 лет назад +17

      this video is 8 years old, he probably called her on her potato phone

    • @vladtepes97
      @vladtepes97 8 лет назад

      18SUNANDA
      i thought potato phones came out only after that.

    • @stephjones8036
      @stephjones8036 7 лет назад +6

      oh, I still identify myself to my parents when I call them. Not sure why, but I do!

  • @yuvalne
    @yuvalne 3 года назад +9

    "I have a crazy idea at least once every 45 minutes, and I count on Hank to be like 'that is a terrible idea'"
    How things have changed...

  • @Sly-zn4sp
    @Sly-zn4sp 5 лет назад +6

    "Are you wearing a disguise?"
    That kid is possibly over a decade old and i hope he becomes the president

  • @izzybellab6024
    @izzybellab6024 9 лет назад +69

    When i first read the title I thought it said "Hank tried to kill me with a hamster" o-o

    • @natedaviz9178
      @natedaviz9178 9 лет назад +4

      And every month we buy a hamster

    • @hossainsalwa99
      @hossainsalwa99 9 лет назад +1

      Isabella'sEmptyChannel Now I'm trying to imagine how you could kill someone with a hamster.

    • @milliongem9860
      @milliongem9860 9 лет назад

      Feliciano Vargas No! How could you bring that up?!

    • @truboo4268
      @truboo4268 9 лет назад

      +Salwa Hossain Shove it down their throat and wait for them to suffocate?

    • @hossainsalwa99
      @hossainsalwa99 9 лет назад

      +Bryan Cotto .... There's always that.

  • @LamanKnight
    @LamanKnight 13 лет назад +1

    "Just keep at it." That's the best book-writing advice anyone has ever given me. Thanks, John!

  • @TheLordofRabbits
    @TheLordofRabbits 11 лет назад +6

    out of context. "I am clearly not an expert in the field of finishing" that is all

  • @Sprut6
    @Sprut6 16 лет назад +1

    I loved fewer questions with longer answers even if my question wasn't answered. :) I loved the little boy that asked you if you were wearing a disguise...that's adorable! You should have said yes and that you were a superhero. haha

  • @AyaMBayomi
    @AyaMBayomi 7 лет назад +5

    I wonder how the next generation of the Green family will feel about this when they watch it in a few years of from now

  • @milli2007
    @milli2007 16 лет назад

    I bought and read Katherines about 2 weeks ago and then I bought and read Alaska 3 days ago and they were both GREAT! Thanks so much for writing them John!

  • @sam_6254
    @sam_6254 9 лет назад +4

    John, YOU ARE MY FAVORITE AUTHOR I LOVE YOU

  • @FreakingNarwhals
    @FreakingNarwhals 12 лет назад +1

    I know this video is super old, but this video encouraged me so much! I've been writing a book since september and I'm only on the fourth chapter. But knowing it took four years to write looking for alaska made me not feel so bad about it! :D

  • @a.benara
    @a.benara 8 лет назад +8

    So it's the first video I click on today and, "Good morning, Hank, it's Tuesday, July 7th."

  • @Kiwikake
    @Kiwikake 16 лет назад

    I just happened upon this video a minute ago, and instantly smiled. You're phenominal. Truly.

  • @mallorykendrick2172
    @mallorykendrick2172 10 лет назад +30

    I don't understand how a person that writes such depressing books can be so hilarious. How does that work?

    • @NautrallBeauty
      @NautrallBeauty 9 лет назад +11

      Not depressing. Enlightening, in order to reach enlightenment you must suffer

    • @adrift-at-c
      @adrift-at-c 9 лет назад +5

      NautrallBeauty That's depressing.

    • @cynderellylastname6060
      @cynderellylastname6060 6 лет назад +2

      He has a darkness deep inside him

    • @cynderellylastname6060
      @cynderellylastname6060 6 лет назад +2

      Also, hello from three years into the future!

    • @sylvy16
      @sylvy16 Год назад

      i am incredibly depressed but i also love being funny in front of others. I don’t know how but it just works. Maybe think of it as compressing all my happy thoughts into a small amount of time, so it looks like i’m very happy

  • @4nrnia
    @4nrnia 12 лет назад

    This is seriously one of my favorite vlogbrothers videos ever.

  • @andrewstewart01
    @andrewstewart01 6 лет назад +4

    Fair warning John, Hank has just bought a new hammer and seems to really enjoy stroking it.

  • @MicahTheZombie
    @MicahTheZombie 16 лет назад

    You inspire me. Both of you... Down there. And up here. And over there.

  • @OctoberNite
    @OctoberNite 10 лет назад +10

    Bad at finishing ? Don't you have a child

  • @foxcatlionpants
    @foxcatlionpants 11 лет назад

    I was 5 when you started writing Looking For Alaska and I read it this year. I don't know why but this blows my mind.

  • @jakemorrison5146
    @jakemorrison5146 8 лет назад +9

    that phone though. lol

  • @patwolfie
    @patwolfie 16 лет назад +1

    That was a fabulous video about your writing experiences. I, too, have stolen from my publisher (promo stuff at ABA). And as the middle of three brothers, I am familiar with the trying to kill thing, both on the receiving and dishing out end. You made me feel excellent by admitting you took four years. My longest was three (snurk snurk) Seriously, keep up the good work. You are hilarious.
    Steven Spruill

  • @mineola_
    @mineola_ 6 лет назад +6

    The Green brothers have such a bad grasp of what is a real memory, and what is a memory of the other one. lol

  • @lundylow
    @lundylow Год назад +2

    0:27 Hindsight is funny. John recently made a video where he talked about how Hank is the one with the thousands of big ideas and John feels like he has to wait for his own to happen. At first I thought this moment here felt like "wait that's the reverse, isn't it?" But John has also been more open about OCD and mental health in recent years, so maybe it's more a matter of "a thousand thoughts for fun projects that might go nowhere" vs "a thousand thoughts I can't control."

  • @ksb0408
    @ksb0408 10 лет назад +3

    I fell into a wormhole and found 2008 on youtube and those glasses... Nice glasses...

  • @abdullahenani9670
    @abdullahenani9670 Год назад +1

    14 years later on recommended, wow

  • @KatySom
    @KatySom 10 лет назад +5

    Killing you with a hammer? Wait..... i'm sorry but that is coincidentally a subplot of a potter puppet pals episode.

  • @Janeyvrocks
    @Janeyvrocks 16 лет назад

    I live in the UK and although I haven't seen any of John's books in the shops - I have been able to order them on Amazon. 'Alaska' and 'Katherines' are in stock and you can pre-order Paper Towns.

  • @tegantalks9612
    @tegantalks9612 9 лет назад +4

    This reminds me of the time I was trying to get some music off the computer in my brother's room and he came in and pulled the chair out from under me and tried to beat me with it! Then since I'm older, my mom got mad at me! Like wtf mom, my brother just tried to kill me with a chair!

  • @thezenofjen
    @thezenofjen 16 лет назад

    thanks for the link ... just ordered. excited to start reading your books !

  • @ham4fun
    @ham4fun 11 лет назад +10

    ive been tryin to finish off a book for the last 20 years. damn im slow

    • @ham4fun
      @ham4fun 10 лет назад

      a book i was writing

    • @magnuspeacock5857
      @magnuspeacock5857 5 лет назад

      @@ham4fun have you finished yet?
      Where can i find it?

    • @ham4fun
      @ham4fun 5 лет назад

      @@magnuspeacock5857 no i havent. i think the last time i even looked at it was 10 years ago.

  • @LauraSomeNumber
    @LauraSomeNumber 7 лет назад

    I don't know why RUclips wants me to rewatch old Vlogbrothers videos but I like it.

  • @leslierodriguez6547
    @leslierodriguez6547 8 лет назад +3

    $3.99???? Wow, it has increased.

  • @DaleBernardoQueLio
    @DaleBernardoQueLio 10 лет назад

    First, that flip-phone has to be a Nerdfighter Star Trek communicator. But more on topic, my sister once kicked me in the gut with pumps on. Admittedly, I was pushing on her bedroom door, insisting that I be heard while she was attempting to close the door because she wasn't taking crap from 'little brother'. The fact that you and Hank are so close despite distance is testimony to the power of sibling feuding.

  • @minefilms1122
    @minefilms1122 10 лет назад +20

    i'm so glad hank didnt succeed. if he did then brotherhood 2.0 wouldnt exist, all the books john made wouldnt exist, and vlogbrothers wouldnt exist. also nerdfighters wouldnt exist.

    • @coena9377
      @coena9377 5 лет назад

      Also Hank would probably be very psychologically traumatized from knowing he killed his brother as a toddler.

  • @juliaskluver7392
    @juliaskluver7392 12 лет назад

    I do volunteer work in my school library and yesterday i found out that we have every single one of your books that i have heard of. The one thing i like about my school has just been announced to the public. :)

  • @bridgethealey3231
    @bridgethealey3231 10 лет назад +4

    I bought paper towns today! Why did Hank try to kill you with a hammer?

  • @catherinesvideos156
    @catherinesvideos156 4 года назад +1

    "not an expert in finishing" oh little did you know what was coming for the wimbly womblys and the swoodilypoopers

  • @alihaleem8264
    @alihaleem8264 9 лет назад +4

    why doesn't vlogbrothers still have a theme song????????

  • @brettkonz2955
    @brettkonz2955 4 года назад +2

    My lord I am so deep in vlog brothers videos that I am here in 2020 -> 12 years after posting 😅

  • @kourtneybarnes5801
    @kourtneybarnes5801 9 лет назад +3

    I'm writing a book, Lets say I'm stuck in chapter 15...................

    • @sparky9264
      @sparky9264 9 лет назад

      Add a second love interest, or another life-or-death scenario (depending on your gender.)

    • @kourtneybarnes5801
      @kourtneybarnes5801 9 лет назад

      Sparky Thank You!

    • @amnaajaib9126
      @amnaajaib9126 9 лет назад

      Kourtney Barnes I'm still stuck on the ending of chapter one, believe me you're doing brilliant!

    • @nykidxxx
      @nykidxxx 9 лет назад +1

      Kourtney Barnes Kill off the main character

    • @sam_6254
      @sam_6254 9 лет назад

      Ni Yao That would be interesting

  • @MUTEscifan31W
    @MUTEscifan31W 15 лет назад

    I agree. I got inspired to write after I read your books.

  • @hannaho9471
    @hannaho9471 7 лет назад +8

    Original clickbait

  • @knockknock16
    @knockknock16 16 лет назад

    I loved "An Abundance of Katherines". It's one of my favorites for its wit and funny graphics. Something can be charming, and NOT cheesy. I love you.
    Seriously, I laughed so much. I bought a copy for my I-can't-finish-a-book best friend. I thought that your book can break her curse!
    ***crosses fingers***
    Hassan won't let me down.

  • @pseudocaveman
    @pseudocaveman 14 лет назад +1

    "Well, I'm sure I was being irritating, but he tried to murder me with a hammer!"
    Best Vlog Brothers quote, ever.

  • @KungfuCow5
    @KungfuCow5 12 лет назад

    Once again John changes the rules in order to win: smothering = an enthusiastic hug.

  • @BillyTheMadHatter
    @BillyTheMadHatter 11 лет назад

    This was the first ever vlogbrothers video I ever watched. I thought I would only watch a few more. Boy, was I wrong.

  • @RoamingChicken
    @RoamingChicken 16 лет назад

    This was awesome! I am an older sibling myself, and my parents never seem to notice when my sister does something bad! It's always me! Here's some random questions:
    1. If you were somehow transported to the middle ages, what would you be? king, peasant, knight, ect.
    2. If you had to be eaten by any animal, which would it be?
    3. Would you rather eat a slug or a spider?
    4. Are you working on another book?
    5. Would you rather move to India, Poland, Togo, or Peru?

  • @InuKagndWolfsRaingrl
    @InuKagndWolfsRaingrl 12 лет назад

    O_O I read An Abundance of Katherine's last summer, and JUST realized that you wrote it!!! Awesome!!

  • @theocaratic
    @theocaratic 7 лет назад +1

    whoaa... i found an old one! never been this far down the rabbit hole before

  • @shannongurl992
    @shannongurl992 15 лет назад

    I'm reading Cat's Cradle now by Vonnegaut (I've read SH5 and Mother Night too) and he's so amazingly weird that you just can't help but love him.

  • @cookiedemander
    @cookiedemander 5 лет назад +1

    My twin brother threw a hammer at my head...it got stuck in my bedroom door approximately three inches to the left of my FACE! We laughed, then quickly began trying to disguise the hole so our Dad wouldn’t see that we had been fighting again. The common enemy (parents) is a strong bond for siblings.

  • @kelseyhm
    @kelseyhm 14 лет назад

    @survivalgun It's the copies of the book that are pre-released, It's the book privately released by its publisher before the book is printed for mass distribution.

  • @awesomearra
    @awesomearra 16 лет назад

    Lol, "that's just hugging." I like the new Katherines cover. And I NEED Paper Towns like Pudge needs Alaska.

  • @keltermoo
    @keltermoo 16 лет назад +1

    "That's just hugging. That's not killing."
    LOL IRL.
    Oh, John. You kill me with a laugh hammer.

  • @boingboingcurls
    @boingboingcurls 16 лет назад

    This comment come sin two parts. Part one:
    I'm in a great mood because I just ordered my advanced copy of Paper Towns. What's so great about this is that I don't have to do the mind boggling task of deciding which cover I would buy if I was in an average bookstore. I'm pretty sure that decision is made for me. And I like that you have readers' guides because I would usually do the same in order to get my hands on some.

  • @R00nilWazlib
    @R00nilWazlib 16 лет назад

    I am going to read your books now, just because you are awesome. And hilarious.

  • @InterplanetJanet77
    @InterplanetJanet77 16 лет назад

    I've read both of John's books, and I must say. I am an exquisite writer.

  • @CanadianSliwka
    @CanadianSliwka 16 лет назад

    Me too!! I just got caught up with all the videos just now.
    Sibling rivalry really does exist everywhere. But, as I am the younger sibling, I will always side with Hank. Nothing personal John!
    -Sylvia

  • @swickscrumtralescent
    @swickscrumtralescent 16 лет назад

    You guys are hilarious. I love every video you two make!!
    How do you keep so fresh?

  • @LoveShiaGDSN
    @LoveShiaGDSN 15 лет назад

    I have one of the $3.99 copies because I bought it at my school's bookfair.
    Which reminds me, my librarians totally LOVED me (it was mutual. they were my favorite over any teacher I ever had at that school). I helped them start the book club and was the first president of it. I even typed out the constitution thingy. They always asked me when they had money to buy books which books I thought they should get.

  • @Samanthagax
    @Samanthagax 16 лет назад

    JOHN. I'm excited for the new book!
    ...That's all I got.

  • @pizzalilly
    @pizzalilly 16 лет назад

    OMG
    I thought I'd heard the name John Green before!
    I love your book Looking for Alaska! Was amazing! Made me cry!
    Its like half one in the morning and I decided to watch a vlogbrothers video 'cause my film isnt loading. But yeah I've never watched one of your videos before as I haven't really had a chance but I'd heard you were an author, not realising I actually had one of your books. So I just totally freaked out and paused the video after you mentioned Looking for Alaska to check. Lol =]

  • @lauranaut
    @lauranaut 16 лет назад

    "Oh, I did. Shucks!" lol.
    Love the new cover, and I'd definitely like a discussion guide.
    Question: Favorite actor?

  • @Xanthius
    @Xanthius 16 лет назад

    Hank is the space between spaces that holds all things living or dead together as a whole.

  • @cpate0005
    @cpate0005 14 лет назад

    You're right. It's super duper freaking awesome. I struggled for a long time to find a sort of outlet for my spirituality and it turns out Unitarian Universalism was the answer to that. For me at least.

  • @emptythecan3793
    @emptythecan3793 3 года назад +1

    Nowadays Hank is having a lot of ideas and counting on John to reign him in. How the tables have turned!

  • @Squirl7504
    @Squirl7504 10 лет назад

    I really really really like your book paper towns. it is #3 on my top three favorite books you wrote. :D

  • @gelingeling
    @gelingeling 13 лет назад

    Oh god! It makes me sooo happy that it took you four years to finish Looking for Alaska. I mean, not happy in a schadenfreude way. But I'm writing on mine since like two years and yah, that's a relieve.

  • @juniperdovah
    @juniperdovah 16 лет назад

    I seriously love you John!
    I definitely would love to score a discussion guide so here's my question...
    Have you ever thought of taking a road trip to various used book stores in the US and leaving a signed copy of your book there? lol I would so do that if I was an author.
    I'm sure the trip would make great material for another novel as well lol so a win-win really xP
    Love you John! DFTBA!

  • @elia19
    @elia19 16 лет назад

    please show more of willie ! more from his life and yours, like when you feed him, how you play with the little nerdfigheter...

  • @monicaerwin3359
    @monicaerwin3359 6 лет назад

    10 years later and i’m still here ✌🏻

  • @ellamalfoy8
    @ellamalfoy8 16 лет назад

    ME TOO! They said they'll have the paperbacks when they come out in August. So I ordered it off Amazon instead. And that makes me sad, cause now I have to wait a week.

  • @lilyellis2761
    @lilyellis2761 11 лет назад

    Saw the bunny at the bottom of the description before it even started, and liked.

  • @xxscream
    @xxscream 16 лет назад

    When writing what do you usually do? This pertains to listening to music, making videos, playing with Willy, etc. whilst writing.
    Yeah, horrible question. DTFBA.
    and your Amazon video is absolutely awesome. :]

  • @Kisf0rKelly
    @Kisf0rKelly 16 лет назад

    XD That's so funny! I can totally picture like, a mini-Hank running after you with a hammer. I can also picture a mini-John running towards mini-Hank with his arms outstretched yelling "BUT I JUST WANNA HUG YOU!"
    hahaha

  • @PsychoCellist
    @PsychoCellist 16 лет назад

    I've discovered the secret...Willy gets his adorable head-turn thing from you!
    When you are imitating children that either recognize you or fail to see the nerdy awesome that is your glasses, you tilt your head to one side JUST like Willy does!~
    Oh, it's so cute~
    Well, I'm not going to lie, it's cuter when the puppy does it.
    Murder could be cute when the puppy does it.
    But still. That's so cool!

  • @TwilightBookaholic
    @TwilightBookaholic 14 лет назад

    It's ok John, I too tried to smother a sibling....with wipes though....cause I thought she was my doll and apparantly that's how I take care of small children....