I hope you enjoyed today's video! Receive a free Organic Orange Blossom Hydrolate with your purchase of $40 or more with Typology. Glow Duo: bit.ly/4djl4KO Lip Oil: bit.ly/4fd4TAN 9-ingredient moisturizer: bit.ly/4c1RRTV Which of these 5 characteristics have you mastered? Which do you struggle with? Let us know in the comments below. Thank you for watching! Love, Jennifer
YES. I work with people who are intelligent and accomplished, genuinely thoughtful people, but SO inelegant-swearing, talking LOUDLY, leaving their dirty dishes in the communal sink, leaving trash everywhere. Very poor form.
I wanted to add that Elegant people value themselves and time; both their time and the time of others. Hence they arrive on time and do what they say they will do. They do not compete because they recognize their value and worth.
I think “do what you say you’ll do” is such a key to living a life of integrity. If you do that, it makes you heads and shoulders above many, many others.
I noticed a friend of mine, when her child was small and she needed to correct his behavior, she would get down low and whisper in his ear. This seemed very respectful to the child and everyone around them, exuded elegance.
I love how you define and describe elegance. It's not at all about wealth or "snootiness" or even what we think of as Beauty. It's about character - aligning my outward appearance and behaviour with who I am internally and who I want to become. Lovely stuff, Jennifer. Thank you.
I'm working on not interrupting people. Part of this has to do with being excited about a topic. But, i need to listen more and jump in less. I try to draw on the example of an older cousin of mine. I see her as always calm and elegant. Sometimes, I try to "channel" how she would handle a social situation and it helps. Thank you for this discussion.
Indeed, the consistent practice of nice manners and behavior becomes habitual after a while, a point I make often to my 14-year old son. I'm his father by the way. The words "polish, sophistication, and gentility" come up a lot in some of the conversations we have about improving personal habits. Usually at the breakfast table. Something else occurs to me with elegance in our movement. . . dropping or putting things down (keys, books, glasses at the dining table, shoes on the floor, etc.) with a loud THUMP. Instead, set things down carefully (and quietly). A point my late mother and her mother (both from the south) always made to us children.
My favorite reminder on here is about scrolling. I even journaled about this last night because I really have been going through a “vacuous season” in my life lately and doom scrolling has been both a fallback and making it worse. Thank you for today’s video!
I’ve been scrolling a lot online since a lot of weird political drama has been going on in the U.S. for the past few weeks. This happened to me during the pandemic too. Realizing why I do this helps me make better choices and put my phone down and look for other ways to cope. I can find real ways to make a good impact in the world.
Iv missed watching your videos, I find them aspirational, encouraging, funny relatable..and CLASSY, ofcourse. Id like my hair to be more elegant, I tend to wear it up alot because its wavey and not styled professionally. I find the phone and over using it with scrolling and just the screen itself invasive and unnecessary to my senses ...Id like to use more natural light to read write and learn or be outdoors . Language and content is something Im sensitive to, pretty good at, though I do sometimes curse bad intensioned people..I love how you laugh in between your points, becos humour is a great influencer. What about eating, taking time to sit down and eat peacefully without rushing or using just one utensil, that is something I miss lately. When we refrain from one thing we allow for something better, time is used well. Rest is important .. Can you elaborate more on this topic ..and do more reanactments..😅😅❤❤ thank you for inspiring and uplifting the day Jennifer.. Love Liat
I struggle most with moving elegantly (unless I consciously think about it) and being elegant under stress and pressure, when I totally lose it and then feel embarrassed.
Hi Jennifer, i have been the odd elegant person standing out since I was a child. It was my tendency towards being an introvert, but I am going to especially work on with holding my tendency to tell someone "too much" in any conversation. It makes me feel terrible afterwards. This video is a wonderful reminder; so thank you. Have a lovely day! Elizabeth
@@Erin_29 So many different interpretations of that, applied to so many individuals, including a few brazen firecrackers who aren't very "ladylike," in my opinion.
Your discussion at around 4:35 about yelling for children hit me hard because I did work on that in myself a lot. We had four kids in a two-story house with a big backyard--very conducive to yelling, haha! I made the decision to actually go out close enough (or up the stairs far enough) so I could speak only a slight bit louder than my usual voice to be heard. I did not want to be remembered by my family and neighbors as a shrew, lol! The thing is, the habit is still with me, now 35 years later. I still find myself going closer to the location of people before speaking whenever possible. As you pointed out, it has become who I am. We CAN train ourselves! Thanks, as always Jennifer, for your great content. 💜
@@jackiebowen6239 Our kitchen was at the opposite end of the house from the kid's rooms. We installed two wireless doorbells for them. No more yelling down the hall!
Do you find that people ask you, “Where are you going?”, due to being dressed elegantly? I have 5 daughters and we get this a lot. One day we had a doctor ask if we were going to a tea party because we had dresses on. When my girls were younger I never took them out with dirty clothes, barefoot, and without their hair done. What would astonish me is how many people noticed. I would get comments about how well behaved they were, or asking about the ones who weren’t with me. I always had them walking quietly and behaving in stores. They knew we would leave if there was any acting out. I wasn’t a strict mom by any imagination, but I taught them there was a time to climb trees and a time to act elegantly. I didn’t use that word, but it was the same thing. It became ingrained in them. To the point that when they were 10 or so, they wouldn’t go shopping with me during the summer due to the way the kids who were out of school behaved. They found it unpleasant to be around as did most everyone else in the store.
Your elegance even show in the way you are writing this comment. Neat, full sentences, without clutter. Even paragraphs to keep your thoughts organized. Thank you for sharing this 👗🌿
I always dress nicely for the doctor because I have seen how others dress at the hospital and I feel they should at least see have the pleasure of seeing a couple decent looking patients each day. This being said my daughter was in the hospital for a very long time 12+ months. It was not an enjoyable situation but I made an effort every day to wear actual clothing and put myself together. It helped me feel better about our sad situation and I think helped me care for her in a more cheerful manner. Moping around in pajama all day would serve no one. Granted my outfits were very casual but they were actual clothes.
@@rebeccabaca559 I hope your daughter is doing well. I can’t imagine 12+ months in a hospital. You are so right regarding feeling better when you get “ready”. I am so much more productive when I do as opposed to when I don’t.
I don’t have children, to raise my voice at but all elegance goes out the window when my dogs won’t come in from the yard 🫣 a great reminder to do better. Thank you Jennifer!
The one I connected to the most is on controlling my actions to a situation when I’m not expecting it. I over react at times when something angers me. Also, the posture thing is a struggle for me. The thing I do best with is I get up, dress up and try to look my best everyday. Even if I’m not going anywhere. I’ve read all your books and watch your videos so I credit you and Thank you for continuing to bring forward things we can change or not change to live our best lives!
I have a bad tendency at work to hit the panic button when an unexpected situation arises, especially if I feel like my own competence is being called into question. I try (but don’t always succeed, LOL) to resist the urge to reply immediately or “fix” the situation. I try to remind myself that it’s okay to take a little time and formulate the best solution than to respond right away and then have to send multiple emails backtracking my initial message. Not only is taking time a more poised response, it also looks more professional. But hitting the panic button and saying or doing something rash is something I’m afraid I will always struggle with.
The other day I was sick in bed and needed my tissue box but didn’t want to yell for my husband, and I sat there and asked myself why don’t I just holler at him like most people do? This video makes me want to lean into and embrace my natural inclinations to be more elegant. I used to think I was just timid and anxious so I would push myself to act more “normal” but when I do that I don’t feel aligned with my true self.
Working remotely has ingrained so many bad habits for me. Often in the morning, if I run to the store to grab a few things with my 14 month old son, he is dressed with intention. I find it easier to find patience when he looks nice. I usually look a step or two more casual (giving myself some grace with that statement). There are most certainly seasons of life, but in this season my son is soaking up all he sees and starting to imitate it. Thank you for the reminder on being better.
Jennifer I loved this video and watched it twice! I need to work on thinking more elegantly. You handled the Starbucks incident so maturely. Too bad those ladies in the parking lot were acting like children!
That's a very beautiful bouquet 💐. Would you consider meeting with your subscribers next time you visit England? I live in Hampshire, and I would love to meet you. 😊
I stopped watching TV about 18 years ago and never went back. Except for the occasional show like All Creatures Great and Small, I don’t watch it ever. * But lately I find myself becoming an Internet news junkie! Recently I gave myself a week long break from all news and I was shocked how many times my fingers gravitated on my photo to my news apps. It felt good to give myself a break and I’ll be taking breaks again from time to time. *But the way, for ACGS fans, my husband and I took a trip to the Yorkshire Dales National Park in June to scope out scenes from the show. It was a total blast! We even got to see some filming and the actress who plays Mrs. Hall was incredibly sweet and kind. We saw so many of the iconic places in the series. I highly recommend the visit, it was simply gorgeous.
That is great how you handled the fighting ladies! I also rush around and it is my natural speed to be quick but that does signal to our brains that we are constantly in a stressful situation (almost that flight response). So I am really trying to work on being efficient but not in a way my body thinks is being flustered. I also don't watch TV but just read and RUclips.
Thank you for the great reminders! Moving elegantly is my biggest challenge…being a “doer” and wanting it done “yesterday” contribute to the hasty moves. 😅 Changing the mindset is step one. Will take your tip of filming myself. 🙈
After living in Europe I learned to be more elegant. My mom was born in Europe so maybe I had some ingrained. Whenever I’m in a situation, over charged or unjust. I approach with reasonable speech….and it always gets resolved.
Speaking uplifting is one area I’ve been working on lately. What motivated me is it’s a Spiritual work of Mercy. All the areas you presented are well worth the effort . Thank you for your words!
Like you, I don’t move elegantly. I do try to walk smoothly& slightly swaying the hips. May I mention….. one of my granddaughters walks& moves very gracefully. She began ballet lessons when very young! She’s been in ballet classes over her growing years & is in high school now… & is very graceful in everything way. You’re still young & could take some type of graceful dancing classes. I’m too old now, however I do take fitness classes & water aerobics which helps in body movements.
What am I best at? Probably dressing in my preferred style. I love to wear dresses because they're automatically feminine but also comfortable! I'm determined to get dressed every day regardless of where I'm going or what I'm doing. I am probably worst at language and reacting to stuff. I would NOT have done as well as you did in that Starbucks situation. Yikes. Traffic is a trigger for me so I try to mentally prepare before I have to get out during rush hour.
Lovely and much needed content. I had a chance to see myself on camera once - unaware that I was being recorded I was doing a simple daily task. I didn't recognize myself at first. I thought: who is this incredibly tense person? 😊 It made me think.
All of these were great; I work in customer service and developing a calm exterior habit is something I am daily working on. Thinking elegantly is my stronger point. All of your suggestions were excellent.
...I believe that the Universe was using you as a " Teacher ", Miss Jennifer ... to the Two wonen involved in the altercation as well as for your children..; As you stated... Of all the individuals they could have approached.....But it was your Energy and your Vibration,that set that in motion and not only did you probably teach them a really good lesson... Also, Your children were observing this ,and learning is always " present ". What a valuable experience for them... and your behaviour and responses were proof - to yourself- that you can handle situations that arise, with Grace and Elegance and Wisdom. This World we are experiencing needs more if that .. Yes, kindness is important, as well.. but as you also mentioned... being Authentic and standing firm on your Core Values, Morals, and what is unacceptable... is much needed. I commend you and I thank you for sharing this Story...it is a Life Lesson.. Great Topic ,and definitely watching again... I was thinking...a printable,lol...... to remind us to not become lackadaisical in our Journey ..... ✨️💟
Thank you for sharing your ideas. The one idea that shined out to me was using elegant words. I like to gather ideas for cooking, sewing, gardening and etc. from the RUclips so I can make our home a sanctuary. If the host of the program uses inappropriate language or negative comments, I remove it from my site. Thank you again for sharing.
Ahh these are lovely tips! Now I know why I’d feel irritated at my mum yelling when it’s dinner time, it’s just not elegant 🤣 I especially love the one about replacing doom scrolling with reading… My other challenge is I get curious about words and places/people that come up in books, and I end up going on my phone to look them up and sometimes slide down a rabbit hole researching other things related to them 🐇 At least it’s educational, but maybe I should get a paper encyclopaedia instead to reduce screen time 😆
This happens to me too! I love historical fiction, so when I read something I want to learn more and then find myself talking down the rabbit hole of scrolling.
I does take thoughtful effort to remain elegant and I'm thankful you keep us in the right frame of mind. Elegance is something I saw in my mother and I strive for it in myself, it is a practice. My strengths are always trying to be kind to others and present myself as a lady. Thank you again Jennifer for these gentle reminders!
Jen, you ALWAYS had great posture. It was one of the first things I noticed about you. I even asked if it was something you were aware of. You said that you worked on it and taught yourself. I was so impressed by that. I even asked if you practiced Yoga. I believe you said "yes".
I have really worked on holding my tongue and not engaging others with inappropriate speech or arguing . My current habit to accomplish is to slow down, live in the moment and move with elegance.
@suzanhurd1296 As I'm approaching 60 years old, I have come to realize that there is little for me to argue about or defend, as I don't approach conversations as a way to prove myself or defend my ego or actions. It's pretty freeing no longer giving a cr@p about what people think, but still being nice and pleasant in the process.😁
It's so funny there's been an influx of how to be feminine, classy content on tiktok and YT, but I feel like your videos/channel is the only one I need. You get to the crux of it without going over the top ( i.e consumerism) or just focusing on the outward appearance, its a wholistic approach. There are influencers out who would have spending thousands of dollars on beauty maintenance monthly, and even more in the quest to be classy/chic/feminine. Insanity!
I struggle with the “yelling at the kids” one. They are all over the house and I tend to default to that to get them to come and do chores or eat dinner.
My favorite elegance inspo is the Queen in the movie "Anastasia" There is a moment when she is "kidnapped" and when the vehicle stops, she is seen sittting there under such an extremely stressful circumstance with perfect posture just sitting. I'm always striving for my inner Queen.
Beautiful and worthwhile information. Thank you for walking with great grace in the world, and sharing your example of elegance with us! You are superb! ❤
The picture that was up for this video. Cracks me up. When I was first married, I used to yell for my husband and my mother told me that I look like a fishmonger’s wife Screamin.. Lol 😅
Thank you Jennifer, another thoughtful and soothing video, and kudos to you for handling that situation so calmly. Moving elegantly is my strength, I trained in ballet for over 15 years when I was young, and I still love dancing today, I go to 5Rhythms classes which is about self-expression. My speech is ok, but I wish I used a wider variety of vocabulary, I could be more articulate. I do make an effort with how I dress, and adding jewellery only takes a minute and will polish any outfit. I often get compliments on my style, although my summer wardrobe needs some work. With acting and thinking elegantly, there's always room for improvement, and since I started meditating (Vedic meditation) every day, I'm definitely improving.
You landed on my feed/I clicked/now I'm a new subscriber, most of the things your saying, I guess I learned from my dearest mother, I miss her immensely, I recently retired & have so much time now being entertained by these lovely/interesting you tube contents, I do have to work on my wardrobe when home, I have gone from dress slacks/skirts/heels/different purses to wearing jeans/sweats/sneakers w/orthotics, lol, but when going out, I clean it up a bit. I am definitely going to show this video to my beautiful grand dtr who is growing up before my eyes, like a bolt of lightning, Please, where did you get the Robe or Kimono Robe you are wearing when patting in the glow drops on your face? TY for your time.
I was recently complimented by a friend of the family at a gathering on the poise way I “carry” myself. I was truly stunned by this compliment. I think poise and patience within the confines of my own home are challenging for me and one I qualities I would like to master. Thank you for such a mindful video. I included these 5 pillars of elegance in my Commonplace Journal.
The way you handled the situation at Starbucks is incredibly inspiring to me. Such an admirable mama bear move and I hope to be that way when I'm with my own 2 young children!
I appreciate this video! I am always well dressed at work and even on the weekends in public. I often have people approach me and ask for advice, many times I have been mistaken for the owner of boutiques and salons. I am sure that is why the two ladies approached you…you are so polished and put off an assertive demeanor. On another note, the endless scrolling! I am not a TV watcher, but do love RUclips. Lately, I have been binge watching political campaign rallies and getting caught up in the back and forth mudslinging. This is so unlike me, as I despise politics. Thanks for the reminder to pick up a book and maybe set a timer❤
@KLynn998 In the 1990s when I had an extremely tiny clothes budget, I was somehow mistaken for an airline attendant, a lawyer and a business owner. I always found good (and cheap!) clothes at TJ Maxx and sample sales in NYC. People would stop and comment. Now, I dress like a wallflower but still cannot dress so casually to wear jeans or sweats. 😊 It's been my experience in the past, when wearing casual clothes, people treated me very differently. It was a more positive experience for me to dress up (i.e. what used to be called "business casual") every day. 😊
I did ballet through high school and then I had a spinal fusion surgery so that really helps with my posture and moving gracefully! Could definitely work on some of those other areas though!
I appreciate what you said about slowing down. My bad lifetime habit is to do things at the last minute and then rush around. I now try to take the time to put things out calmly and ahead of time, such as my shoes at the front door (since we only wear slippers in the house), moving slowly, while thinking about my fun plans ahead.
Thank you for this video. It was a refresher of the themes in your book. I am best at the last characteristic. I have always believed we should be life long learners and enjoyer of reading and the arts. The being calm in difficult situations is my hardest one. I am learning to take deep breaths and count to 10 before reacting to a situation. Thank you Jennifer! You have truly have been an inspiration to me and my life is better for it. Blessings!
I will start with my strength... Think Elegantly-I am a life long learner and I love everything about the arts. I am an English teacher and I watch life intently to pass the knowledge on to my students. It is all in the details!!! My weakness- Speak Elegently- Nope, I have a LOUD volume and cuss regularly. After listening to this video and reading all of your books this summer I am going to change my ways. I also went to Paris and had a delightful time, and you were always on my mind. I value you a lot! Thank you!!!!!!!
I love this topic. And the story about the two women was so funny! More elegance & reading! I’m currently reading John La Carre and building that habit once again. So satisfying, reading. It feels like a mini-vacation.
So much to think about here! I am currently on a mission to present myself better through my outward appearance. I recently got color and style analyzed by House of Colour and this has been a huge help 👍🏻
If i did what you did here in Minneapolis, I would probably be in a hospital or dead. Society has become so violent---especially the youth. Our state leadership certainly has set a tone here....I hope the country takes note. I think a moral and calm presence is exemplary.
Thank you, Jennifer, for your very doable and practical list of elegant practices! It is so easy to become complacent and let an elegant habit slip. Something I find helpful is that I choose my best and most intimate friends to be women who also practice these qualities. Their elegance raises me up, and I hope mine does the same for them. You are loved and appreciated!💖
Oh my goodness, Jennifer! That Starbucks story was crazy! I live in Mississippi, and that sounded like some stereotypical “Waffle House behavior”- not a California Starbucks! I lol-ed at your response to the women! You did handle that well, and I’ve definitely filed that away for any future crazy encounters on my part!
Oh boy, this was full of great reminders, especially when it comes to yelling around the house. I don't do that often, but when I do, everybody hates it. I hate it too, it gives me zero power and I feel stupid after that. My children also hate it when I loose my cool in public places and act hurried and stressed. I never associated this with elegance, so this will definitely help me relax a bit more when I'm under stress. Kudos for the way you handled this potentially dangerous situation. I think that when under stress, we unconsciouly look for father or mother-like figures to quiet us down, which is no doubt what these women could see in you. You've handled this superbly and set a wonderful example for your daughters, well done! Thanks Jennifer for another thought-provoking video.
The first about rushing connected the most with me. As a teacher I create a mantra for myself at the beginning of each school year and the one I created for this year is: Slow down Look around Be open Your video was perfectly timed.
The bouquet is so beautiful! I love these reminders. I took ballet as a child so i have good posture and carry myself elegantly; however, in a very efficient person and have to remind myself to slow down..😊 I would like to be more articulate. I love reading and have been adding to my vocabulary. Blessings xoxo Stacie
I've taken the challenge to take the extra steps to where my children are to speak them about coming down for dinner or cleaning up. It is something I still need to work on. I hope there is still hope for us! 😂
Loved this!! I also appreciated the comment on timeliness - that combined with movement is what I've been very aware of lately. Rushing around, whether on foot or in vehicle, isnt safe, nor elegant.
I needed this so much. I must say I need to work on speaking elegantly. I have a habit of shouting for others across the house and outside in yard, not very pleasant!
Thank you, Jennifer, so much for this video; I most struggle with "dressing elegantly." I possess all the other classy elegant traits. I will diligently work every day to improve this classy elegant trait. However, on the other hand, my strongest classy trait is treating others with compassion and kindness, as well as maintaining a calm demeanor when faced with daily stressful situations.
Dear Jennifer, I have become better at presenting myself elegantly and love to explore the 10-item wardrobe more and more each season. The part, I am struggling with is speaking elegantly in stressful situations, especially when I feel hurried and the kids aren’t willing to follow me (home, to kindergarten, or follow my instructions generally) Speaking compassionately and gently is my next goal to work on.
I just watched with my girls. On the note of Talking Elegantly, my 6-year wanted to suggest “just walking to your kids and talking with them” 😅 They have made their list of what they are doing quite well on (dressing elegantly) and what they can improve (acting and talking more elegantly).
Great video! So many things made me smile…I know I vacuum and clean in a very athletic/vigorous way! I’ll try to be elegant next time. To me, elegant is calm…and I do finally feel like I am achieving that most of the time!
Great video! In speaking, I think be need to be cognizant of our tone. Delivery can make or break a person's day, mood, etc. Kudos to you in the argument situation. Well done. I definitely think elegantly. Thank for sharing.
This topic is of great interest to me. Yelling out at my children has become a habit. I have rambunctious boys so it will be a challenge to figure out ways to capture their attention without raising my voice above a certain volume.
If there’s a light on (obviously at night or on a stormy day) turning the light off should get their attention immediately. My sister did this with her second grade class…..at first, it shocked them into silence, and later, when it didn’t shock them, it just told them that Teacher meant business. Good luck.
During the pandemic during prolonged lockdowns, I learned more about etiquette and dining manners. My mother gave me a good foundation but I wanted to learn about the finer points and any modern updates, even about dining and cultural protocol in other cultures. I learned from my mother that how you are in the privacy of your home is how you’ll be in public-that it is difficult to separate your private self and public self in terms of how you present and behave. I focused on my movements overall and dining etiquette at home during lockdowns, even when it was me alone. Even if I brought sushi home, I practiced Japanese dining etiquette (hopefully 😊 my practice pays off in a Japanese restaurant).
I think the hardest one is to stay consistent with who I am becoming under duress. It’s particularly difficult with medical people who are condescending. For me anyway. Good posture is my best. Yoga has been incredibly helpful with body awareness.
I hope you enjoyed today's video! Receive a free Organic Orange Blossom Hydrolate with your purchase of $40 or more with Typology. Glow Duo: bit.ly/4djl4KO Lip Oil: bit.ly/4fd4TAN 9-ingredient moisturizer: bit.ly/4c1RRTV
Which of these 5 characteristics have you mastered? Which do you struggle with? Let us know in the comments below. Thank you for watching! Love, Jennifer
"Part of elegance is being respectful to the people around you." Well said!
YES. I work with people who are intelligent and accomplished, genuinely thoughtful people, but SO inelegant-swearing, talking LOUDLY, leaving their dirty dishes in the communal sink, leaving trash everywhere. Very poor form.
I wanted to add that Elegant people value themselves and time; both their time and the time of others.
Hence they arrive on time and do what they say they will do.
They do not compete because they recognize their value and worth.
I think “do what you say you’ll do” is such a key to living a life of integrity. If you do that, it makes you heads and shoulders above many, many others.
I noticed a friend of mine, when her child was small and she needed to correct his behavior, she would get down low and whisper in his ear. This seemed very respectful to the child and everyone around them, exuded elegance.
I love how you define and describe elegance. It's not at all about wealth or "snootiness" or even what we think of as Beauty. It's about character - aligning my outward appearance and behaviour with who I am internally and who I want to become. Lovely stuff, Jennifer. Thank you.
Absolutely! Elegance is available to everyone!
Yes I agree. One can be tasteful and appropriate with any budget.
I'm working on not interrupting people. Part of this has to do with being excited about a topic. But, i need to listen more and jump in less. I try to draw on the example of an older cousin of mine. I see her as always calm and elegant. Sometimes, I try to "channel" how she would handle a social situation and it helps. Thank you for this discussion.
Indeed, the consistent practice of nice manners and behavior becomes habitual after a while, a point I make often to my 14-year old son. I'm his father by the way. The words "polish, sophistication, and gentility" come up a lot in some of the conversations we have about improving personal habits. Usually at the breakfast table. Something else occurs to me with elegance in our movement. . . dropping or putting things down (keys, books, glasses at the dining table, shoes on the floor, etc.) with a loud THUMP. Instead, set things down carefully (and quietly). A point my late mother and her mother (both from the south) always made to us children.
So true about how we handle our belongings. Great point!
My favorite reminder on here is about scrolling. I even journaled about this last night because I really have been going through a “vacuous season” in my life lately and doom scrolling has been both a fallback and making it worse. Thank you for today’s video!
Yes! Less scrolling and more reading has been a goal of mine. ♥
I completely understand this.
I've also really been struggling with doom scrolling...more than normal and I'm trying to evaluate why that is.
I’ve been scrolling a lot online since a lot of weird political drama has been going on in the U.S. for the past few weeks. This happened to me during the pandemic too. Realizing why I do this helps me make better choices and put my phone down and look for other ways to cope. I can find real ways to make a good impact in the world.
Iv missed watching your videos, I find them aspirational, encouraging, funny relatable..and CLASSY, ofcourse.
Id like my hair to be more elegant, I tend to wear it up alot because its wavey and not styled professionally.
I find the phone and over using it with scrolling and just the screen itself invasive and unnecessary to my senses ...Id like to use more natural light to read write and learn or be outdoors . Language and content is something Im sensitive to, pretty good at, though I do sometimes curse bad intensioned people..I love how you laugh in between your points, becos humour is a great influencer.
What about eating, taking time to sit down and eat peacefully without rushing or using just one utensil, that is something I miss lately.
When we refrain from one thing we allow for something better, time is used well. Rest is important ..
Can you elaborate more on this topic ..and do more reanactments..😅😅❤❤ thank you for inspiring and uplifting the day Jennifer.. Love Liat
I struggle most with moving elegantly (unless I consciously think about it) and being elegant under stress and pressure, when I totally lose it and then feel embarrassed.
your human....I do a few things in this video, not even going to express what I need work on, LOL!
Hi Jennifer, i have been the odd elegant person standing out since I was a child. It was my tendency towards being an introvert, but I am going to especially work on with holding my tendency to tell someone "too much" in any conversation. It makes me feel terrible afterwards. This video is a wonderful reminder; so thank you. Have a lovely day! Elizabeth
Awareness is the first step!
I can relate ❤
Wow you just described a virtuous women. I want to be a virtuous godly women. 👌🏻💚🍃
Proverbs 31🩷
@@Erin_29 So many different interpretations of that, applied to so many individuals, including a few brazen firecrackers who aren't very "ladylike," in my opinion.
@@katie7748 I'm not understanding your comment. The Bible is very specific on how a virtuous woman acts.
Your discussion at around 4:35 about yelling for children hit me hard because I did work on that in myself a lot. We had four kids in a two-story house with a big backyard--very conducive to yelling, haha! I made the decision to actually go out close enough (or up the stairs far enough) so I could speak only a slight bit louder than my usual voice to be heard. I did not want to be remembered by my family and neighbors as a shrew, lol! The thing is, the habit is still with me, now 35 years later. I still find myself going closer to the location of people before speaking whenever possible. As you pointed out, it has become who I am. We CAN train ourselves! Thanks, as always Jennifer, for your great content. 💜
It can be tricky! I find myself doing the same thing! I want one of those old-fashioned intercoms haha
@@iriswelch3553 Great idea!! 💡
@@jackiebowen6239 Our kitchen was at the opposite end of the house from the kid's rooms. We installed two wireless doorbells for them. No more yelling down the hall!
So happy that you got out of that situation safely. The world is so extreme lately and horrifying situations pop up out of nowhere.
Do you find that people ask you, “Where are you going?”, due to being dressed elegantly? I have 5 daughters and we get this a lot. One day we had a doctor ask if we were going to a tea party because we had dresses on.
When my girls were younger I never took them out with dirty clothes, barefoot, and without their hair done. What would astonish me is how many people noticed. I would get comments about how well behaved they were, or asking about the ones who weren’t with me.
I always had them walking quietly and behaving in stores. They knew we would leave if there was any acting out. I wasn’t a strict mom by any imagination, but I taught them there was a time to climb trees and a time to act elegantly. I didn’t use that word, but it was the same thing. It became ingrained in them. To the point that when they were 10 or so, they wouldn’t go shopping with me during the summer due to the way the kids who were out of school behaved. They found it unpleasant to be around as did most everyone else in the store.
Your elegance even show in the way you are writing this comment. Neat, full sentences, without clutter. Even paragraphs to keep your thoughts organized. Thank you for sharing this 👗🌿
@@verchip8 Thank you. What a lovely comment! I truly appreciate the compliment.
@@Mytitus2journey 💐
I always dress nicely for the doctor because I have seen how others dress at the hospital and I feel they should at least see have the pleasure of seeing a couple decent looking patients each day. This being said my daughter was in the hospital for a very long time 12+ months. It was not an enjoyable situation but I made an effort every day to wear actual clothing and put myself together. It helped me feel better about our sad situation and I think helped me care for her in a more cheerful manner. Moping around in pajama all day would serve no one. Granted my outfits were very casual but they were actual clothes.
@@rebeccabaca559 I hope your daughter is doing well. I can’t imagine 12+ months in a hospital. You are so right regarding feeling better when you get “ready”. I am so much more productive when I do as opposed to when I don’t.
Are you sure you are not a true Southern Belle? Your elegance is true of many women in the south. Where we appreciate these finer details.
I never realized what an aggressive cleaner I was until I saw myself on film 😂 Thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Same 🙈
Sometimes the elbow grease is required 😂
I don’t have children, to raise my voice at but all elegance goes out the window when my dogs won’t come in from the yard 🫣 a great reminder to do better. Thank you Jennifer!
Been there, done that 😁
OMG to be elegant for your dogs, I couldn’t love this more!
The one I connected to the most is on controlling my actions to a situation when I’m not expecting it. I over react at times when something angers me. Also, the posture thing is a struggle for me.
The thing I do best with is I get up, dress up and try to look my best everyday. Even if I’m not going anywhere. I’ve read all your books and watch your videos so I credit you and Thank you for continuing to bring forward things we can change or not change to live our best lives!
Wonderful! Thank you!
I have a bad tendency at work to hit the panic button when an unexpected situation arises, especially if I feel like my own competence is being called into question. I try (but don’t always succeed, LOL) to resist the urge to reply immediately or “fix” the situation. I try to remind myself that it’s okay to take a little time and formulate the best solution than to respond right away and then have to send multiple emails backtracking my initial message. Not only is taking time a more poised response, it also looks more professional. But hitting the panic button and saying or doing something rash is something I’m afraid I will always struggle with.
The other day I was sick in bed and needed my tissue box but didn’t want to yell for my husband, and I sat there and asked myself why don’t I just holler at him like most people do? This video makes me want to lean into and embrace my natural inclinations to be more elegant. I used to think I was just timid and anxious so I would push myself to act more “normal” but when I do that I don’t feel aligned with my true self.
I feel like elegance is the beautiful version of mindfulness 🥰🙏
Working remotely has ingrained so many bad habits for me. Often in the morning, if I run to the store to grab a few things with my 14 month old son, he is dressed with intention. I find it easier to find patience when he looks nice. I usually look a step or two more casual (giving myself some grace with that statement). There are most certainly seasons of life, but in this season my son is soaking up all he sees and starting to imitate it. Thank you for the reminder on being better.
Jennifer I loved this video and watched it twice! I need to work on thinking more elegantly. You handled the Starbucks incident so maturely. Too bad those ladies in the parking lot were acting like children!
That's a very beautiful bouquet 💐. Would you consider meeting with your subscribers next time you visit England? I live in Hampshire, and I would love to meet you. 😊
Me too !
I stopped watching TV about 18 years ago and never went back. Except for the occasional show like All Creatures Great and Small, I don’t watch it ever. *
But lately I find myself becoming an Internet news junkie! Recently I gave myself a week long break from all news and I was shocked how many times my fingers gravitated on my photo to my news apps. It felt good to give myself a break and I’ll be taking breaks again from time to time.
*But the way, for ACGS fans, my husband and I took a trip to the Yorkshire Dales National Park in June to scope out scenes from the show. It was a total blast! We even got to see some filming and the actress who plays Mrs. Hall was incredibly sweet and kind. We saw so many of the iconic places in the series. I highly recommend the visit, it was simply gorgeous.
That is great how you handled the fighting ladies! I also rush around and it is my natural speed to be quick but that does signal to our brains that we are constantly in a stressful situation (almost that flight response). So I am really trying to work on being efficient but not in a way my body thinks is being flustered. I also don't watch TV but just read and RUclips.
Yes, I think the rushing does send signals to our body that we are in flight!
Thank you for the great reminders! Moving elegantly is my biggest challenge…being a “doer” and wanting it done “yesterday” contribute to the hasty moves. 😅 Changing the mindset is step one. Will take your tip of filming myself. 🙈
Jennifer, just wanted to say that your hair looks particularly lovely in this video!
After living in Europe I learned to be more elegant. My mom was born in Europe so maybe I had some ingrained. Whenever I’m in a situation, over charged or unjust. I approach with reasonable speech….and it always gets resolved.
Speaking uplifting is one area I’ve been working on lately. What motivated me is it’s a Spiritual work of Mercy. All the areas you presented are well worth the effort . Thank you for your words!
Like you, I don’t move elegantly. I do try to walk smoothly& slightly swaying the hips. May I mention….. one of my granddaughters walks& moves very gracefully. She began ballet lessons when very young! She’s been in ballet classes over her growing years & is in high school now… & is very graceful in everything way.
You’re still young & could take some type of graceful dancing classes. I’m too old now, however I do take fitness classes & water aerobics which helps in body movements.
What am I best at? Probably dressing in my preferred style. I love to wear dresses because they're automatically feminine but also comfortable! I'm determined to get dressed every day regardless of where I'm going or what I'm doing. I am probably worst at language and reacting to stuff. I would NOT have done as well as you did in that Starbucks situation. Yikes. Traffic is a trigger for me so I try to mentally prepare before I have to get out during rush hour.
Always love your B-role Jennifer!!
Thank you!
Lovely and much needed content. I had a chance to see myself on camera once - unaware that I was being recorded I was doing a simple daily task. I didn't recognize myself at first. I thought: who is this incredibly tense person? 😊 It made me think.
All of these were great; I work in customer service and developing a calm exterior habit is something I am daily working on. Thinking elegantly is my stronger point. All of your suggestions were excellent.
My..those roses are beautifully arranged
...I believe that the Universe was using you as a " Teacher ", Miss Jennifer ... to the Two wonen involved in the altercation as well as for your children..; As you stated... Of all the individuals they could have approached.....But it was your Energy and your Vibration,that set that in motion and not only did you probably teach them a really good lesson... Also, Your children were observing this ,and learning is always " present ". What a valuable experience for them... and your behaviour and responses were proof - to yourself- that you can handle situations that arise, with Grace and Elegance and Wisdom.
This World we are experiencing needs more if that .. Yes, kindness is important, as well.. but as you also mentioned... being Authentic and standing firm on your Core Values, Morals, and what is unacceptable... is much needed. I commend you and I thank you for sharing this Story...it is a Life Lesson..
Great Topic ,and definitely watching again... I was thinking...a printable,lol...... to remind us to not become lackadaisical in our Journey ..... ✨️💟
Thank you for sharing your ideas. The one idea that shined out to me was using elegant words. I like to gather ideas for cooking, sewing, gardening and etc. from the RUclips so I can make our home a sanctuary. If the host of the program uses inappropriate language or negative comments, I remove it from my site. Thank you again for sharing.
lets not even mention Gordon Ramsay, throwing food back at people and using four letter words, appalling behaviour
Ahh these are lovely tips! Now I know why I’d feel irritated at my mum yelling when it’s dinner time, it’s just not elegant 🤣 I especially love the one about replacing doom scrolling with reading… My other challenge is I get curious about words and places/people that come up in books, and I end up going on my phone to look them up and sometimes slide down a rabbit hole researching other things related to them 🐇 At least it’s educational, but maybe I should get a paper encyclopaedia instead to reduce screen time 😆
This happens to me too! I love historical fiction, so when I read something I want to learn more and then find myself talking down the rabbit hole of scrolling.
I does take thoughtful effort to remain elegant and I'm thankful you keep us in the right frame of mind. Elegance is something I saw in my mother and I strive for it in myself, it is a practice. My strengths are always trying to be kind to others and present myself as a lady. Thank you again Jennifer for these gentle reminders!
Jen, you ALWAYS had great posture. It was one of the first things I noticed about you. I even asked if it was something you were aware of. You said that you worked on it and taught yourself. I was so impressed by that. I even asked if you practiced Yoga. I believe you said "yes".
Thank you, Leslee! Love you!
You look exceptionally beautiful today, Jennifer❤
I have really worked on holding my tongue and not engaging others with inappropriate speech or arguing . My current habit to accomplish is to slow down, live in the moment and move with elegance.
@suzanhurd1296 As I'm approaching 60 years old, I have come to realize that there is little for me to argue about or defend, as I don't approach conversations as a way to prove myself or defend my ego or actions. It's pretty freeing no longer giving a cr@p about what people think, but still being nice and pleasant in the process.😁
It's so funny there's been an influx of how to be feminine, classy content on tiktok and YT, but I feel like your videos/channel is the only one I need. You get to the crux of it without going over the top ( i.e consumerism) or just focusing on the outward appearance, its a wholistic approach. There are influencers out who would have spending thousands of dollars on beauty maintenance monthly, and even more in the quest to be classy/chic/feminine. Insanity!
I have to agree. I also watch a channel on RUclips by Mrs. Midwest. She is young and has two little boys.😊
Absolutely 👍 Jennifer is the original!
I struggle with the “yelling at the kids” one. They are all over the house and I tend to default to that to get them to come and do chores or eat dinner.
My favorite elegance inspo is the Queen in the movie "Anastasia" There is a moment when she is "kidnapped" and when the vehicle stops, she is seen sittting there under such an extremely stressful circumstance with perfect posture just sitting. I'm always striving for my inner Queen.
You are an incredibly impressive women. Thank you for sharing your story. You empower me to do the same 😊You are your montra ❤
Thank you! ♥
@@TheDailyConnoisseur Your children witnessed your wisdom, and your elegance, and on such a big morning! Truly, thank you again for sharing this 😊
Good job (Mama Bear) with dealing with that altercation in front of your kids 👏🏻.
Beautiful and worthwhile information. Thank you for walking with great grace in the world, and sharing your example of elegance with us! You are superb! ❤
Good for you Jennifer. You should feel so proud to have handled that odd situation so well and setting such a wonderful example for your children.
Early ballet lessons helps with moving elegantly. It also gives one perfect posture
The picture that was up for this video. Cracks me up. When I was first married, I used to yell for my husband and my mother told me that I look like a fishmonger’s wife Screamin.. Lol 😅
Those women in the Starbucks parking lot have probably never been called out on their behavior. Good for you!
Thank you Jennifer, another thoughtful and soothing video, and kudos to you for handling that situation so calmly. Moving elegantly is my strength, I trained in ballet for over 15 years when I was young, and I still love dancing today, I go to 5Rhythms classes which is about self-expression. My speech is ok, but I wish I used a wider variety of vocabulary, I could be more articulate.
I do make an effort with how I dress, and adding jewellery only takes a minute and will polish any outfit. I often get compliments on my style, although my summer wardrobe needs some work. With acting and thinking elegantly, there's always room for improvement, and since I started meditating (Vedic meditation) every day, I'm definitely improving.
You sound very articulate! Don't sell yourself short! ❤
❤So VERY PROUD OF YOU Jennifer for how beautifully you handled that altercation at Starbucks🤩 Blessings Sister 😊
You landed on my feed/I clicked/now I'm a new subscriber, most of the things your saying, I guess I learned from my dearest mother, I miss her immensely, I recently retired & have so much time now being entertained by these lovely/interesting you tube contents, I do have to work on my wardrobe when home, I have gone from dress slacks/skirts/heels/different purses to wearing jeans/sweats/sneakers w/orthotics, lol, but when going out, I clean it up a bit. I am definitely going to show this video to my beautiful grand dtr who is growing up before my eyes, like a bolt of lightning, Please, where did you get the Robe or Kimono Robe you are wearing when patting in the glow drops on your face? TY for your time.
I was recently complimented by a friend of the family at a gathering on the poise way I “carry” myself. I was truly stunned by this compliment. I think poise and patience within the confines of my own home are challenging for me and one I qualities I would like to master. Thank you for such a mindful video. I included these 5 pillars of elegance in my Commonplace Journal.
The way you handled the situation at Starbucks is incredibly inspiring to me. Such an admirable mama bear move and I hope to be that way when I'm with my own 2 young children!
I appreciate this video! I am always well dressed at work and even on the weekends in public. I often have people approach me and ask for advice, many times I have been mistaken for the owner of boutiques and salons. I am sure that is why the two ladies approached you…you are so polished and put off an assertive demeanor. On another note, the endless scrolling! I am not a TV watcher, but do love RUclips. Lately, I have been binge watching political campaign rallies and getting caught up in the back and forth mudslinging. This is so unlike me, as I despise politics. Thanks for the reminder to pick up a book and maybe set a timer❤
@KLynn998 In the 1990s when I had an extremely tiny clothes budget, I was somehow mistaken for an airline attendant, a lawyer and a business owner. I always found good (and cheap!) clothes at TJ Maxx and sample sales in NYC. People would stop and comment. Now, I dress like a wallflower but still cannot dress so casually to wear jeans or sweats. 😊 It's been my experience in the past, when wearing casual clothes, people treated me very differently. It was a more positive experience for me to dress up (i.e. what used to be called "business casual") every day. 😊
You look stunning, especially in white! ❤ Love your advice.
I did ballet through high school and then I had a spinal fusion surgery so that really helps with my posture and moving gracefully! Could definitely work on some of those other areas though!
I appreciate what you said about slowing down. My bad lifetime habit is to do things at the last minute and then rush around. I now try to take the time to put things out calmly and ahead of time, such as my shoes at the front door (since we only wear slippers in the house), moving slowly, while thinking about my fun plans ahead.
Thank you for this video. It was a refresher of the themes in your book. I am best at the last characteristic. I have always believed we should be life long learners and enjoyer of reading and the arts. The being calm in difficult situations is my hardest one. I am learning to take deep breaths and count to 10 before reacting to a situation. Thank you Jennifer! You have truly have been an inspiration to me and my life is better for it. Blessings!
Beautiful video that came right on time !
I always learn something new from you. Thank you for upholding the good things. - Michelle
I will start with my strength... Think Elegantly-I am a life long learner and I love everything about the arts. I am an English teacher and I watch life intently to pass the knowledge on to my students. It is all in the details!!! My weakness- Speak Elegently- Nope, I have a LOUD volume and cuss regularly. After listening to this video and reading all of your books this summer I am going to change my ways. I also went to Paris and had a delightful time, and you were always on my mind. I value you a lot! Thank you!!!!!!!
I love this topic. And the story about the two women was so funny! More elegance & reading! I’m currently reading John La Carre and building that habit once again. So satisfying, reading. It feels like a mini-vacation.
So much to think about here! I am currently on a mission to present myself better through my outward appearance. I recently got color and style analyzed by House of Colour and this has been a huge help 👍🏻
If i did what you did here in Minneapolis, I would probably be in a hospital or dead. Society has become so violent---especially the youth. Our state leadership certainly has set a tone here....I hope the country takes note. I think a moral and calm presence is exemplary.
Thank you, Jennifer, for your very doable and practical list of elegant practices! It is so easy to become complacent and let an elegant habit slip. Something I find helpful is that I choose my best and most intimate friends to be women who also practice these qualities. Their elegance raises me up, and I hope mine does the same for them. You are loved and appreciated!💖
Lovely video, thank you.
Amazing response Jennifer! You were assertive and protected your children while keeping your own cool. Very well done!
Oh my goodness, Jennifer! That Starbucks story was crazy! I live in Mississippi, and that sounded like some stereotypical “Waffle House behavior”- not a California Starbucks! I lol-ed at your response to the women! You did handle that well, and I’ve definitely filed that away for any future crazy encounters on my part!
They were arguing over a Mercedes 🥴 So it was kind of California Starbucks behavior 😂
Oh boy, this was full of great reminders, especially when it comes to yelling around the house. I don't do that often, but when I do, everybody hates it. I hate it too, it gives me zero power and I feel stupid after that. My children also hate it when I loose my cool in public places and act hurried and stressed. I never associated this with elegance, so this will definitely help me relax a bit more when I'm under stress. Kudos for the way you handled this potentially dangerous situation. I think that when under stress, we unconsciouly look for father or mother-like figures to quiet us down, which is no doubt what these women could see in you. You've handled this superbly and set a wonderful example for your daughters, well done! Thanks Jennifer for another thought-provoking video.
I really enjoy your videos so inspiring. Also I have your chic collection and always go back to them! Thanks so much for everything.
Love your personal examples Jennifer! So appreciate your channel and content :)
Gosh I really enjoyed this video. I’ve been feeling a bit stagnant and uninspired lately and this has helped create a shift! Thank you Jennifer 😊
The first about rushing connected the most with me. As a teacher I create a mantra for myself at the beginning of each school year and the one I created for this year is:
Slow down
Look around
Be open
Your video was perfectly timed.
The bouquet is so beautiful! I love these reminders. I took ballet as a child so i have good posture and carry myself elegantly; however, in a very efficient person and have to remind myself to slow down..😊
I would like to be more articulate. I love reading and have been adding to my vocabulary. Blessings
xoxo Stacie
I've taken the challenge to take the extra steps to where my children are to speak them about coming down for dinner or cleaning up. It is something I still need to work on. I hope there is still hope for us! 😂
Loved this!! I also appreciated the comment on timeliness - that combined with movement is what I've been very aware of lately. Rushing around, whether on foot or in vehicle, isnt safe, nor elegant.
This is helpful! Thank you, Jennifer!
Jennifer, You would really enjoy the book."Choosing Civility" by P.M. Fourney. BTW- I love your thumbnail!
I love your videos, Jennifer, they make life wonderful under my roof!
I needed this so much. I must say I need to work on speaking elegantly. I have a habit of shouting for others across the house and outside in yard, not very pleasant!
Your videos make me so happy. Thank you!
Thank you, Jennifer, so much for this video; I most struggle with "dressing elegantly." I possess all the other classy elegant traits. I will diligently work every day to improve this classy elegant trait. However, on the other hand, my strongest classy trait is treating others with compassion and kindness, as well as maintaining a calm demeanor when faced with daily stressful situations.
I loved this video so much! Thank you for reminding me of my ultimate goal right now in life- especially as a mom of three kids under 5!
Dear Jennifer,
I have become better at presenting myself elegantly and love to explore the 10-item wardrobe more and more each season.
The part, I am struggling with is speaking elegantly in stressful situations, especially when I feel hurried and the kids aren’t willing to follow me (home, to kindergarten, or follow my instructions generally)
Speaking compassionately and gently is my next goal to work on.
I just watched with my girls. On the note of Talking Elegantly, my 6-year wanted to suggest “just walking to your kids and talking with them” 😅
They have made their list of what they are doing quite well on (dressing elegantly) and what they can improve (acting and talking more elegantly).
This was truly a great video
I feel like I am looking at grown up virgin of princes Charlotte of England when watching your videos 🌺
Great video!
So many things made me smile…I know I vacuum and clean in a very athletic/vigorous way! I’ll try to be elegant next time.
To me, elegant is calm…and I do finally feel like I am achieving that most of the time!
I was interested in the French Typology makeup. We have Ella Bache here in Australia - also from France. Their products are really good too.
Great video! In speaking, I think be need to be cognizant of our tone. Delivery can make or break a person's day, mood, etc. Kudos to you in the argument situation. Well done. I definitely think elegantly. Thank for sharing.
This topic is of great interest to me. Yelling out at my children has become a habit. I have rambunctious boys so it will be a challenge to figure out ways to capture their attention without raising my voice above a certain volume.
If there’s a light on (obviously at night or on a stormy day) turning the light off should get their attention immediately. My sister did this with her second grade class…..at first, it shocked them into silence, and later, when it didn’t shock them, it just told them that Teacher meant business. Good luck.
@@mosiep.2911 great idea!
Good tips
During the pandemic during prolonged lockdowns, I learned more about etiquette and dining manners. My mother gave me a good foundation but I wanted to learn about the finer points and any modern updates, even about dining and cultural protocol in other cultures. I learned from my mother that how you are in the privacy of your home is how you’ll be in public-that it is difficult to separate your private self and public self in terms of how you present and behave.
I focused on my movements overall and dining etiquette at home during lockdowns, even when it was me alone. Even if I brought sushi home, I practiced Japanese dining etiquette (hopefully 😊 my practice pays off in a Japanese restaurant).
Finally see one of your videos on my feed! 🎉
Elegantly said and posted.
I think the hardest one is to stay consistent with who I am becoming under duress. It’s particularly difficult with medical people who are condescending. For me anyway. Good posture is my best. Yoga has been incredibly helpful with body awareness.