New here, I will click on it, been down this road twice, I will never marry again. It was like raising another child. And I was never young enough, hence the divorce ❤❤❤❤
Thank you for this,similar experience here too. After 30yrs we divorced but live together (seperate rooms) and split everything like "roommates". Still have hard days and it hurts. Who am I and what do I want for ME? You basically read my mind through this whole video! 🙂
I've been through two divorces, one after 11 years & one at 34 years, so I know what you are feeling. It sort of feels like cleaning the cobwebs out so the sun can find you again. I hope you have family or friend support close by. I was 17 when I first married so I had really never been on my own my entire life. I'm now 68 and have just retired. My condo is quiet but I'm getting into things I never had time to before. Make sure to take time for you, to remind yourself. Try not to rush into another relationship. At this point in my life I've decided to just let my children, grandchildren, and some close friends be enough. Find pleasure & peace in the little things. Take care.
@Teresa Meisner, I got married at 20 and a second time at 43. They say "you attract what you are" and indeed I did. I was a bit broken and so were the boys I married. It wasn't a complete disaster...I have three great kids and three amazing grands, and I too have just decided to let those who are in my life be every bit of enough. Every situation is unique and the most we can do is our best to steward the things and people we are blessed to do this life with. Sounds like Becka has a level head and a good start at rediscovering all the things.
I also agree. After 33 years with my husband (now ex) you will have ups and downs along the way. Be kind to yourself and treat others how you want to be treated. Now it's yours turn to follow your dreams. 🤗🤗
Everyone copes differently under these circumstances. I applaud you for taking the first steps in transforming "our" home into "my" home. In most cases, this should help as you move along in your new life. Redecorating and rearranging your bedroom will also be a very important step to finding your new self. My husband passed away after 44 years of marriage and the best thing that I did was redecorate and refurbish the home while still retaining artwork, photographs and mementos that keep his memory alive.
I have no words. Everyone leaving these types of comments must be very young in age. Instead of trying to encourage this poor woman to work it out, you are telling her to focus on decorating her home. Marriage takes LOTS OF WORK. If you have children with someone, then work at finding that love again. ❤️
Wow thanks for this…my husband has been gone now for 5 years and I thought if I changed anything in our bedroom it would be removing his memory…thank you
@@texasjones9541 what are you talking about? The lady who left this comment said she lost her husband of many years. The video says she is happy with the decision to separate, and this is one of the ways she is working this out.
@JustKiddin Yes, I understood that. She among everyone as a woman, should be an encouragement to try and save a marriage, it takes work. I can almost bet her 44 years of marriage was not always smooth. I just feel like everyone is going on and on that the redecorating of the house importance. Most of the videos are of an unorganized home. Yes, i get that too, hard to keep order with children. I myself have been married for 36 years to a military (Navy) and love, kindness and commitment takes work not only for each other but the children we created because we love each other through the good times and bad till death do us part. I just wish more couples would try and work it out.
“Nobody cheated on anybody…nothing bad like that” An example of two adults mature enough to compromise on ending their relationship. If you are not happy, say so THEN go and do your “extra-curricular activities”. Have respect for the person you gave yourself to and simply communicate. Take notes from this gracious lady!
This takes me back 15 years. I left for a long weekend so that my ex could move out. Came back to a mess. Cleaning, clearing stuff out, resetting and reorganizing was so cathartic. Felt like I was reclaiming the place.
@@HappilyEverBecka thousands of us have been through it. I’m sorry for anyone to go through this. Just remember it’s ‘through’ it. It gets sooo much better.
It is all about reclaiming ones self. I think we tend to lose ourselves in our relationships, forget that person we once were. It isn’t out with the old onto the new but just bringing back you…💗
@ava cadman just me... there is no "ones self" when you love each other enough to have children. I just get sad every time I see these breakups. I would truly try to make it work. When she called him a child while cleaning the bathroom, it was a red flag in the respect not given in the relationship. Things can be changed in a relationship to make it work. Those years of having children are toughest for the relationship. With the home being in disarray, the comments from her on him being a child, I understand. Anyhow, I have no clue how I Even got to this channel on my feed, but I felt led by God to encourage everyone to work on the little things before divorce. Yes, sometimes there are awful things in a marriage that cannot be fix, not sure this is one that has no hope. I just get the feeling it is a bunch of small petty items that can be worked on to find the love they once had for each other. God bless you all.
I separated from my husband for 5 months, our kids were 9 & 10. Definitely a needed break. It was good to focus on us and get a taste of divorced life. Eventually, we decided to restart. Every situation is different, hope the separation brings clarity
I'm so happy you restarted. I don't think anyone knows the negative impact splitting up a family has on the kids. I'd rather stay in the home until the kids are grown before I ran off to greener pastures, but that's me. I was that kid from a divorced home.
@@AngelStormee my parents divorced also, it was very adversarial. It's been 15 years since my reconciliation and I've learned that some marriages can be fixed but some are toxic and/or abusive and irreparably broken. Grace needs to be poured out on families walking the divorce path because it's so painful and hard. Especially when children are involved.
I was separated from my ex when my kids were 2 and 5. My only advice to you is to keep moving forward and never look back! If this is definitely the right thing for you, then look towards the future and move on. Of course your kids come first, but don't put yourself last! They can't be happy if you aren't. Love you and wish you only the best! 💖😁
I pray the Lord restore their marriage. True love of your children means you work things out UNLESS he is an abuser. Your happiness does NOT override your duties as a mother and part of that is loving them enough to work things out with their father. Do the children have a say in this? it's their life too.
@Carol Forsythe true if I could go back I would've worked it out. No man will love your children like their father. When he moved on and remarried my kids suffered emotionally 😩I could then never really focus on a new relationship because they would feel I'm abandoning them too. It's been over 20 years and even though their in their 20s they haven't found love or started families of their own. They fear marriage and it breaks my heart. I pray God heals all of us who's been at this crossroads to really understand how critically it can change our lives. Peace to you
I am glad to see healthy separation instead of people trashing the other, sometimes we move in different directions and It is good to see content like this, thank you.
Becka I’m writing from Turkey. As you know there has been a terrible earthquake here. My country is having the hardest times. But i am so sorry to hear that you are also having hard times. I hope your new life brings you happines and peace 💕
I am very sorry I wish you the best you have my prayers marriage is hard I never used to understand when people were married 50 years it was such a big deal. I have been married 44 years it is hard it has not all been hugs and hearts their are times we don’t even like each other you are so brave I never had the courage to end it my husband is a good man but it is hard. You deserve to be happy, will be thinking of you take care.❤❤❤❤❤
Thank you so much Diana, that means so much to me that you shared that. Marriage is really hard and I hope through all those years you found more happy then trying. Everyone deserved to be happy ♥️
I am sure it's very hard to maintain a good relationship and marriage for that length of time. But on the other hand I may have been brave and stuck up for myself and divorced and became a strong independent woman, raising 2 children on my own. I made a lot of mistakes and I went through everything alone and on my own. I am 62 disabled and alone and very lonely. I have God and Jesus, my children have their own lives. There is good and bad on both sides, I guess it depends on if you are married or single and of course your age. May God Continue to Bless us.
Hi Becka I also separated from my partner when my twins where 3 & my oldest was 7 1/2 . My relationship was different from your's. I was in an abusive relationship & frightened of him. I couldn't take it anymore. I finally found the courage to get him out of our lives for good. I went out & worked fulltime to provide for my 3 kids. I had to as he never paid child maintenance to me for his 3 kids. My house became soo much happier & the kids were in a much better household. I also bought my own house. My family were a great support to me with watching my 3 kids whilst I went to work. If your relationship isn't working out for whatever reason & you have tried to make it better & it's still not working. Do not waste anymore of your life on it. There's a big world out there. I was scared to on my own with 3 kids to pay the bills etc. But I did it & so will you. I wish you & your kids a lovely life . All the best to you Becka.x
I am so sorry to hear this , but so glad that it was a mutual decision and you are friends and still working together to raise your boys , I really hope both of you find true happiness and continue to be great friends!!! Love to all in this new journey !!!!!
This is the first video that I watched from you. It came in my feed, and I'm glad it did. Stay strong. You can do this. Everything happens for a reason.
I just found you and subscribed. As a single mom I want to support this journey you are going through. I also appreciate the grace in which you handled this difficult video.
This is my first time here on your page. I’m so sorry to hear about your separation. I commend you both for coming to a decision together. If things are done, it’s best not to force it and lead down the road to unhappy years. Good for you for doing what’s best for you and your family. ❤
I’m sorry this happened to your family, as a fellow divorced woman who has since remarried, you are strong and this is most certainly your time to find yourself as you say. Sitting with your emotions and thoughts is the best thing to come into your own. I am new to your channel but I’m excited to see how you bloom as a person on this new journey. ❤
Omg, heart felt sorry for your situation. So shocked by this. You seemed to have the perfect family. I guess no one ever knows a person's true life. I wish you, your husband and all your family the best and hope you guys all find a way through things. But your a true inspiration. You never fail to impress me with your resilience and fighter determination to carry on. Best wishes to you all.
It’s great to be transparent and honest with your followers with that being said, I once was told by a professional that divorce should never take place unless there is abuse of any kind, addiction, or betrayal/ cheating in the marriage, any other problems can be worked out through a professional to try to keep the family together. In my circumstance there was alcohol addiction so I had to say good bye to the marriage.
I just discovered your channel a few minutes ago. I love your spirit, your drive and determination. Somehow, I just know that you and your child are going to be just fine. You rock. Peace and Blessings from my family to yours.
Thanks for your courage and openness to share this part of your journey. That is huge! You know this is right for you, and I'm glad you are willing to share and receive support from all of us. Cleaning and redecorating can help so much with the healing process. When I left a 3-year relationship in my 20s (entirely different scale, I know), I almost entirely lost my appetite and ended up doing an intuitive 7-day fast where I ate only a snack or two every day. Fasting can be unhealthy depending on your mindset and history, but for me it felt like a way to devote all my energy to healing, and it felt like an expedited emotional healing process. At the end of that week, I was shocked at how ready I felt to move forward with freedom and joy. I also looked up a whole bunch of Meetup groups, and made sure to meet new people. The kinds of people I wanted to become friends with were different than the kinds of people I had gravitated to in the past, and in making new friends, I learned more about who I was now wanting to become as a person.
Hi Becka I stumbled across your channel and you got this. I got married later than most people at the age of 32. I was married for maybe 3 1/2 years and I left my husband. I was 35 when I left. There wasn’t any hate or anything between us. I literally had to start over. I was ok with that though. I never dreamed I would meet the man I’m truly in love with 2 1/2 years later. I’ve been married for 11 years this year. I just turned 50 in February and I am so blessed and thankful I had the courage to make a change. You will go through all different feelings but it will make you stronger in the long run. Take care
Everyone I know has been married in their 30's. People are doing that now. I was 32. My sister was 30. My mom was 30. I have a neighbor who is getting married for the first time in July and she is 62. I have a coworker who was 40. People don't subscribe to the pressure to marry young anymore. It's about what is right for you.
I got married to my 1st husband when I was 19 back in the 1980’s. I went in blindly and both of us very immature. I didn’t know myself let alone him. Married almost 16 years and got divorced. 3 years after that I did meet someone who I respected and he respected me. He loved my children and we have a god centered life ❤.
I'm so sorry to hear about this! I went through the same thing years ago, and it was one of the most difficult times of my life. What I learned was to give myself time to grieve, not to rush it, and to not suppress my hurt and anger. You have to live in that moment, and take things as they come. One day at a time. Prayers for all of you!
I'm glad you had time to process your emotions in a healthy way after your separation. Going through a good home clean was uplifting to see and hear. Thank you for this video. Also have an fun new journey even though it may seem hard at times, you are doing great as a mother. Keep up on your new journey! And keep the new content comming! This was my first video watch and I loved to see you bring some life back after a loss.
Big hugs mama... You got this! 🧸 Life always works out how it's meant to in the end and there is a reason for everything. Here for all the motivation!!
My heart goes out to you! I was in the same position a few months ago except he had left the house 2 days after I came home from visiting family and celebrating my birthday. In my case, I had tried to make it work up until he was gone but he drove off and I had to clear the house. It’s never easy, and healing isn’t linear. My heart goes out to you! It gets better 🫶🏼
I am in your position, with 3 kids and haven't worked since our 3 year old was born. He left a literal mess, along with a financial mess, for me to clean up. It has been an extreme struggle mentally, physically, and financially. I am envious of her strength and mindset. God bless you both.
Being in a good relationship with yourself is the best role model for your kids, whether you are with someone or not. Wishing you so much for this new chapter in your life!
There was something very touching about seeing you find a place for the cuddlecup as one of the first things you rearranged; I can tell you that keeping all forms of sweet, uncomplicated love close by was vital for me when going through the separation from more complicated love. Although it may not feel like it at times, you are never completely separated from love that's still around you, and that still comes from you. Stay well : )
Everyone handles their situation differently as it is unique to them. I will tell you everyone loves a great comeback story!!! You’ve got tons of content to film now for sure! Get ready with me videos where you are showing self care would be fun.
Yes ma'am. I'd love to join along with someone's journey of ***Self love & Finding & Loving Yourself right here you are if anyone has any recommendations of channels like this I would greatly appreciate knowing*** tia
Thank you for being so brave and sharing what you are going through with your community. Hopefully finding yourself gets easier each day, everyone deserves to be happy. Take care.
You're doing great hun, I've been thru this myself, things get easier, just remember we all allowed bad days and a bad day doesnt mean a bad life,I have "mini" meltdowns every now and again still and I allow myself them knowing I will pick myself up again in a couple of hours (this is all I allow myself lol) ,just a wee tip about shower curtains ,I actually put 2 up ,my expensive one to the front then I hang a cheap white one at the back of it ,this is the one that gets wet and I throw out when the mildew stains it and replace with another cheap one , that way my "good one" only needs the odd freshen up , wishing you all the very best for the new chapter of youre life x
Becka, how are you really? Please take care of yourself during this new season of your life. I'm praying for many blessings to come your way! Keep up the great job!
My wife and myself wish you all the best, we have both been through the same thing. It takes quite a while to start again but it will get easier bit by bit. Cheers from Melbourne, Australia
This is my first time here, but I’ll definitely be here to watch more! A divorce and separation are always hard. But embrace finding yourself. It brings so much peace to your soul. It’s an odd thing to go through grief of the separation but also having excitement for what’s to come. However it’s an amazing thing to be able to see the light in the dark. ❤
Congrats on putting you first!!! Coming from a divorced mom of twins (they were 6 at the time), the trauma of divorce even when it's the right choice is real. Our situations are very similar in that it wasn't extenuating circumstances, but it still took quite a bit of time and self-love to get me to totally me. One day at a time. Mom's work at this twice in tandem... once as a woman and once as a caregiver of their little humans. Be easy on yourself ♥️
I wish you all the best in your new life! I'm a single mum of three now adult kids (also a grandma) and when the father of my kids left it was not easy but at the same time a big releave for all of us. A big hugh from Switzerland, i like your videos and your choice of music!
You've got this. I'm going through this myself. Unfortunately for me, he left a much bigger mess for me to clean up. But onward and upward. Keep doing what you are doing. It will get better. I too have been trying to re-find myself. I'm getting there. Much happier now than before.
Becka, Hugs sent your way. I am so glad that you are going to use this time to "rediscover" yourself. That is the most important thing you can do for you. Take the time to figure out who you are and what you want for you.
1st time here and applaud you for your strength, honesty, maturity and your account of your situation. Because this is a time for you to consider yourself, separate from your husband and moving forward, make time to take up or explore new interests or a hobby, have fun! You have a great outlook and attitude. Your children are very lucky, to have a mom like you!
Hey Becka I know the decision was not a easy one. It never is. You and Chris made the right choice for your family. Not everyone’s path is the same. You are a strong and amazing woman.
Wonder if the children got a vote in the situation? Everyone thinks they can move on to a new relationship and things be great. When you put people into your life because you suddenly need a man, they never love your children like your previous spouse. The stepchildren are a hated part of the new relationship equation.
My children are my top priority and I have no intentions of getting into a relationship with anyone but myself for a long time. This is my healing journey, and if that day ever came I assure you if anyone EVER treated my children less than, they would immediately be out of my life.
@Happily Ever Becka If your top priority were the children, you would find a way to make it work without a divorce. It cannot be about you ever, until those children are grown. A stepmother 2 street over from us locks her stepchildren out till she comes home. Somewhere there is love because you have children together, now work it out.
I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree because I think it’s more important for my children to see their parents happy and thriving rather then miserable. Btw if a stepmom ever did that to my children I would be in handcuffs afterwards, I will make it very well known that situations like that would never be tolerated. But to be honest I trust my children’s father enough to know he would never let something like that happen in his home to his children. Very sad for those children that went through that.
Sending you peace, energy and good vibes. Good for you for cleaning and organizing and reclaiming your space. And as someone else commented, how nice that you didn't disparage or blame your husband in any way.
Becka, I'm so sorry to hear this. I've been through it several times, and it's very hard. You're a strong young lady, and you will get through this! Make sure to take care of yourself. Sending hugs to you and your children. 😊 💕❤️
First time here,I subscribed because I want to support a single mama any way I can. My mama was a single mama of 4 who battled cancer yet still was a warrior til her last breath 3 years ago. She never put our father down even through his infidelity issues. We were able to grow our own emotions towards our sperm donor. You're doing AMAZING and your respect for the father of your children reminds me so much of her.
First time here and I’ve been there…. I want to support you because you are showing such grace and strength through a very hard time so I’m subscribing. Just know there will be ups and downs, and you are worthy, not just as a Mom but as a woman. It took me a long time to figure that out but it looks like you’re already on the right track.
I got divorced when my kids were little and of course put them first - I’m sure you are doing the same 🥰 don’t put yourself last though and make sure you find things each day that bring you joy 😊
I’m glad you didn’t lose your home. The final move out is always hard not leaving those spaces empty is a good move. I’m sorry you lost each other it’s a sad thing when you realise you love but your no longer in love with each other it’s a loss like no other. My best advice is don’t fightback the tears etc the storm clears quicker when you don’t it’s an important part of the healing process.
Hi, just found your video today. I think I’ll stick around 😊 Sorry you’re going through such a rough time, marriage is hard. But you are doing what is right for you, and that’s what matters most. Hang in there, I’ll be watching from here on out.
So sorry for what you are going through. Been there too. And you will find yourself again I promise!! You have to take care of yourself!! Sending you much love and encouragement!
So many of us have been thru this same situation. You are not alone. Your content is great and I will continue to support your channel. Keep looking ahead and trust your judgment ❤
I am sad to hear that. I pray that everyone adjusts and finds their happy space and new normal as quickly as possible. Thanks for being transparent and brave enough to share. It really helps others that are going through the same situations.
Wow ..honey your NOT ALONE!!THERE IS NO PAIN OIKE LOSING SOMEONE AND GRIEVING WHILE THEY ARE STILL ALIVE. .. I LOVE YOU AND I SHARE THIS STRUGGLE. VALIDATION FOR EVERYTHING THAT HURTS. KEEP MOVING FORWARD EVEN IF YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE IT. YOU ARE VERY MATURE AND I APPRECIATE YOU SHARING THIS STRENGTH. TODAY IS A HUGE DAY FOR YOU PROVING JUST HOW STRONG YOU ARE TO YOURSELF.
*I appreciate your transparency. May this day and the days ahead be filled with immense healing and abundance! The absence of a partner that you’ve been with for a very long time brings on a flood of emotions. Take one day at a time. 💜*
Got you in my recommended. Whatever you are going through you will be overcome and be stronger for it. You are a force to be reckoned with as you do your cleaning, and so you shall also be in whatever life throws at you. I hope things get better and this decision gives you the peace and happiness that you deserve. 💕
First time watching your programming. Your post popped up in my feed. Such a wonderfully peaceful transition video. The cleaning seemed cathartic, and your tone didn't sound stressful or irritated by the situation you're in. I am praying for you both to continue in the path you're following out of what can be a difficult season. You certainly have a beautiful home and lovely spaces to live in. ❤️
Honestly did the same thing when one of my exs moved out I bought new furniture got rid of the bed we slept on etc now I have better furniture anyway and I’m so much happier with a new man and home I can be proud of we all cope differently but doing things for yourself is the key ❤ make yourself the most important Xx
Aw, Becka! I’m so sorry about your marriage.😔 At the same time, I’m so glad that you’re in a place where you are doing well (better, anyway), where you can start fresh and create a new and beautiful life for yourself and your boys!❤
And that’s how you do it !!! You just cleared away the negative heavy energy from your space making it a fresh new starting point which will bring in peace and abundance my dear…. Well done, be excited for all that’s coming for you next 💚
I'm so sorry you're going through this. HUGS This is my first video to your channel and I subscribed. There's not a lot you can do but feel the feelings, but distractions help a lot. Turning those spaces into YOUR spaces is a wonderful start. You're on the right track. Wishing you the best. ♥ ♥
Oh my God I'm sorry but this has got to be the best cleanup I've ever watched because of the subject title. I could watch these all day getting rid of the negative aroma in the air! I hope you feel it with happy juju! :-) I'm all about it!
TYSM for sharing this with the community. Just know that you are supported and though I do not personally know what you are going through I can send you healing prayers and relaxing vibes through the internet.
Hi! I’m brand new and subscribed to both your channels. I’m so impressed by you! I’m a 75 year old woman who was divorced after 12 years of marriage. I have now been with my second husband for 43 years. My advice is to try to keep to a routine, especially with children, and also make sure you get your rest. Good luck, hon, and I’ll be watching and catching up on your videos. ❤️
Hugs. It's never easy to close one chapter and open another even if closing one was on good terms, it's still hard to start over. I am sure you guys will be happier for the choices your making now before it got to a point of ugly. You will always have my support for your videos :)! I am not quite sure how this youtube thing works but I will even watch the ads right through if that helps support your channel :)
New to channel. Do what makes you happy. If you're happy, your babies will be happy. I used an entire can of Comet on just my bathroom sink when my ex and I separated. You got this!!
Hi, Becka! I know these are hard times but we're here for you. I'm a silent subscriber since then and I'm saddened by the news. But life goes on anyways. We have to move on. Stay strong momma! You're brave sharing about it to the world. You're a beautiful and strong momma to your kids. Don't worry, we'll still gonna support all the way no matter what your contents are. Looking forward to your fresh start on a new journey. Please do still make vlogs if you're gonna have a new job. More like of a "life of a working mom" video. Always keep safe! Much love from the Philippines! :)
Been there, remember to look after yourself. Your health, mental and physical are the best to offer to yourself and your children. I made my bedroom over too, it was awesome. Painted my walls, made it feel so new and fresh. Your beautiful, smart and kind. Each day does get better.
Ohhhh I loved cleaning after my ex Narc left!!!...What a relief!!....the house was almost empty...he took over the entire house. It felt so good to throw out left overs & put the music blasted and dance as I cleaned...fresh new start. .I re painted..re decorated...I loved it!!
Circle the date a year from now on your calendar. Everything will be totally settled and you will be even more relieved to have gotten it all over with.
@@HappilyEverBecka I gave this to a friend as an idea when she was going through a divorce and the amount of decisions were overwhelming. We not only circled the date but made a plan for a little girls getaway for the same time frame to have something happy to look forward to. Best wishes.
I’ve been in your shoes and it’s a scary place. ❤ you’re all in my prayers. The best advice from personal experience is , 1. You and the kids dad keep showing up for the kids and being there for them. 2. Don’t talk bad about your ex in front of the kids, 3. Give yourself at least a year before you start dating , 4. Not sure of your faith, but for me, finding a biblically sound church was so important. I wish you so much future happiness!!! You’ll get through this!
Thank you Tanya, I appreciate you giving me some advice ♥️ I defiantly will be implementing all of those. Him and I both just want the best for the kids, so we won’t be saying anything about each other and we’ll be cordial around one another. Very grateful for that through this.
Sending love and hugs your way. I am going through the same and it's unbelievably tough, but us ladies are/can be so 💪 strong! P.s.. I was eyeing up the rug thinking how lovely it was the entire time, I wish I could have sneaked into your trash and took it for me 😄 🤣 haha
First time here. Just be mindful of your feelings in every step so you're sure that what you're doing is good for you. I think when we spend so much time thinking from the "We" it can be rough to take decisions as an individual again. Obviously your kids will always be first, I'm talking about this moment of getting to know yourself again as a single person. It's very brave what you're doing, choosing happiness. And it's a great example for your children. Thank you for sharing.
Hi Becka, so sorry to hear your news, sometimes we have to do what’s right for us as much as it hurts 😢😢 Sending huge hugs and love to you from Western Australia xxx 💜🦋💜
I am so behind, I’ve been busy with my mom at MD Anderson and her treatments. I’m sorry about the separation, people change, it is rough. I wish you all the best. I can totally relate, I’m have been everything to everyone so long that if someone asked me what I want, what I like, or what I want to be when I grow up (lol) all I would know to say is I don’t know! Some times you have to choose you ! And that is hard to do when your mom and wife a grandma, a daughter a sister a aunt, etc and everyone needs you. My advice is go with it! Enjoy you! Celebrate you! Your a rock star!
I have been where you are now. I became homeless with a 4 year old and lost my job because we lived on base and ran my daycare. Not sure how I made it work. My son is now 26 and is a loving, strong and over all pleasant human being. One piece of unasked for advice would be always always put the kids first and never let anyone get in the way of that. There’s so much child abuse that goes on, that as parents we should try to never use them against the other and be open with your ex. I believe it is when we argue and fight over stupid stuff or use the Childers to get back at the other is when others see what we don’t and then our children are at risk. When we allow other partners be involved in the co-parenting we are putting our kids at risk. If the child or children want to see the other parent even if it isn’t “their time” let them. Because it’s not you getting hurt, it’s the kids. When the parents can truly co-parent then no one else outside of them should be making decisions. No one outside of the parents should feel like they have a say so in raising the kids. This is not to say that someday their might me another step parent and they can’t help. It’s just to say that the parents are the ones that should be making decisions on behalf of their children. Talk to your kids and be open. Make sure they know what’s right and what wrong when it comes to adult behavior. This is new to them and things are done differently, but they should know what’s right and what’s wrong. I do hope you succeed with RUclips.., I’m gonna subscribe and like your videos. I don’t even know what kind of content you make 😂
Hi Becka, just wanted to say you're very brave to speak about what going on with you. Keep pressing forward, praying and staying positive. God will give you all the grace& strength you need. I'm glad you guys are still in a good place. Live your life and do what makes you happy.
Marriage takes work. Instead of trying to rediscover why they fell in love in the beginning, they just flush it down the toilet. The real ones that suffer are the children. They will realize it in the future the mistakes made. She even orders him to leave the mess so she can make a video, good grief. Not sure why I was shown this in my video feed, not for me.
Congrats for taking your life back. Been there. Sorry about the separation ...better days ahead. Don't look back. Keep moving forward. Cleaning house always gave me a sense of freedom, especially after a break up. Looks like you're doing great! I commend you for taking a stand! 🙏👍👏 This is my first time being here. Life goes on and breakups happen for a reason. I'm happy now and you will be too!
Here is a link to my vlogging channel for those who want to follow along on this new journey with me ♥️
ruclips.net/channel/UCDMqJzdXaVVsdFHkQPXbE2w
I will ck it! I have had a similar experience. You are so brave!
Thank you ♥️ I’m sorry you’ve been through this too.
New here, I will click on it, been down this road twice, I will never marry again. It was like raising another child. And I was never young enough, hence the divorce ❤❤❤❤
People grow apart, because I love my husband however I’m not wanting it to work..
Thank you for this,similar experience here too. After 30yrs we divorced but live together (seperate rooms) and split everything like "roommates". Still have hard days and it hurts. Who am I and what do I want for ME? You basically read my mind through this whole video! 🙂
I've been through two divorces, one after 11 years & one at 34 years, so I know what you are feeling. It sort of feels like cleaning the cobwebs out so the sun can find you again. I hope you have family or friend support close by. I was 17 when I first married so I had really never been on my own my entire life. I'm now 68 and have just retired. My condo is quiet but I'm getting into things I never had time to before. Make sure to take time for you, to remind yourself. Try not to rush into another relationship. At this point in my life I've decided to just let my children, grandchildren, and some close friends be enough. Find pleasure & peace in the little things. Take care.
@Teresa Meisner, I got married at 20 and a second time at 43. They say "you attract what you are" and indeed I did. I was a bit broken and so were the boys I married. It wasn't a complete disaster...I have three great kids and three amazing grands, and I too have just decided to let those who are in my life be every bit of enough. Every situation is unique and the most we can do is our best to steward the things and people we are blessed to do this life with. Sounds like Becka has a level head and a good start at rediscovering all the things.
First time to your channel and want to appreciate the way you explained the situation without putting your husband down.
Ditto
I am new as well and I agree with you. Very mature to do.
Agree
I agree ❤️❤️
I also agree. After 33 years with my husband (now ex) you will have ups and downs along the way. Be kind to yourself and treat others how you want to be treated. Now it's yours turn to follow your dreams. 🤗🤗
Everyone copes differently under these circumstances. I applaud you for taking the first steps in transforming "our" home into "my" home. In most cases, this should help as you move along in your new life. Redecorating and rearranging your bedroom will also be a very important step to finding your new self. My husband passed away after 44 years of marriage and the best thing that I did was redecorate and refurbish the home while still retaining artwork, photographs and mementos that keep his memory alive.
I’m so sorry for your loss Liz, my heart goes out to you. Your words are so kind and warming, thank you ♥️
I have no words. Everyone leaving these types of comments must be very young in age. Instead of trying to encourage this poor woman to work it out, you are telling her to focus on decorating her home. Marriage takes LOTS OF WORK. If you have children with someone, then work at finding that love again. ❤️
Wow thanks for this…my husband has been gone now for 5 years and I thought if I changed anything in our bedroom it would be removing his memory…thank you
@@texasjones9541 what are you talking about? The lady who left this comment said she lost her husband of many years. The video says she is happy with the decision to separate, and this is one of the ways she is working this out.
@JustKiddin Yes, I understood that. She among everyone as a woman, should be an encouragement to try and save a marriage, it takes work. I can almost bet her 44 years of marriage was not always smooth. I just feel like everyone is going on and on that the redecorating of the house importance. Most of the videos are of an unorganized home. Yes, i get that too, hard to keep order with children. I myself have been married for 36 years to a military (Navy) and love, kindness and commitment takes work not only for each other but the children we created because we love each other through the good times and bad till death do us part. I just wish more couples would try and work it out.
“Nobody cheated on anybody…nothing bad like that”
An example of two adults mature enough to compromise on ending their relationship. If you are not happy, say so THEN go and do your “extra-curricular activities”. Have respect for the person you gave yourself to and simply communicate.
Take notes from this gracious lady!
This takes me back 15 years. I left for a long weekend so that my ex could move out. Came back to a mess. Cleaning, clearing stuff out, resetting and reorganizing was so cathartic. Felt like I was reclaiming the place.
She wanted him to leave a mess so she could film it for youtube. Unless I heard wrong she stated so in the video.
I did say that. Beck I totally understand what you mean. I felt like it was very cathartic too doing it ♥️ Sorry you went though that.
@@HappilyEverBecka thousands of us have been through it. I’m sorry for anyone to go through this. Just remember it’s ‘through’ it. It gets sooo much better.
It is all about reclaiming ones self. I think we tend to lose ourselves in our relationships, forget that person we once were. It isn’t out with the old onto the new but just bringing back you…💗
@ava cadman just me... there is no "ones self" when you love each other enough to have children. I just get sad every time I see these breakups. I would truly try to make it work. When she called him a child while cleaning the bathroom, it was a red flag in the respect not given in the relationship. Things can be changed in a relationship to make it work. Those years of having children are toughest for the relationship. With the home being in disarray, the comments from her on him being a child, I understand. Anyhow, I have no clue how I Even got to this channel on my feed, but I felt led by God to encourage everyone to work on the little things before divorce. Yes, sometimes there are awful things in a marriage that cannot be fix, not sure this is one that has no hope. I just get the feeling it is a bunch of small petty items that can be worked on to find the love they once had for each other. God bless you all.
I separated from my husband for 5 months, our kids were 9 & 10. Definitely a needed break. It was good to focus on us and get a taste of divorced life. Eventually, we decided to restart. Every situation is different, hope the separation brings clarity
I'm so happy you restarted. I don't think anyone knows the negative impact splitting up a family has on the kids. I'd rather stay in the home until the kids are grown before I ran off to greener pastures, but that's me. I was that kid from a divorced home.
@@AngelStormee my parents divorced also, it was very adversarial. It's been 15 years since my reconciliation and I've learned that some marriages can be fixed but some are toxic and/or abusive and irreparably broken. Grace needs to be poured out on families walking the divorce path because it's so painful and hard. Especially when children are involved.
I was separated from my ex when my kids were 2 and 5. My only advice to you is to keep moving forward and never look back! If this is definitely the right thing for you, then look towards the future and move on. Of course your kids come first, but don't put yourself last! They can't be happy if you aren't. Love you and wish you only the best! 💖😁
Thank you so much Debbie! This comment means more to me than you know! ♥️
Totally Agree, Best luck to Becka & her children!
I pray the Lord restore their marriage. True love of your children means you work things out UNLESS he is an abuser. Your happiness does NOT override your duties as a mother and part of that is loving them enough to work things out with their father. Do the children have a say in this? it's their life too.
@Carol Forsythe true if I could go back I would've worked it out. No man will love your children like their father. When he moved on and remarried my kids suffered emotionally 😩I could then never really focus on a new relationship because they would feel I'm abandoning them too. It's been over 20 years and even though their in their 20s they haven't found love or started families of their own. They fear marriage and it breaks my heart. I pray God heals all of us who's been at this crossroads to really understand how critically it can change our lives. Peace to you
@@carolforsythe6316 kids say No
I am glad to see healthy separation instead of people trashing the other, sometimes we move in different directions and It is good to see content like this, thank you.
BECKA, GRACE TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY DURING THIS TRANSITION. 🙏
Thank you Jeanita ♥️
Becka I’m writing from Turkey. As you know there has been a terrible earthquake here. My country is having the hardest times.
But i am so sorry to hear that you are also having hard times. I hope your new life brings you happines and peace 💕
I am very sorry I wish you the best you have my prayers marriage is hard I never used to understand when people were married 50 years it was such a big deal. I have been married 44 years it is hard it has not all been hugs and hearts their are times we don’t even like each other you are so brave I never had the courage to end it my husband is a good man but it is hard. You deserve to be happy, will be thinking of you take care.❤❤❤❤❤
Thank you so much Diana, that means so much to me that you shared that. Marriage is really hard and I hope through all those years you found more happy then trying. Everyone deserved to be happy ♥️
I am sure it's very hard to maintain a good relationship and marriage for that length of time. But on the other hand I may have been brave and stuck up for myself and divorced and became a strong independent woman, raising 2 children on my own. I made a lot of mistakes and I went through everything alone and on my own. I am 62 disabled and alone and very lonely. I have God and Jesus, my children have their own lives. There is good and bad on both sides, I guess it depends on if you are married or single and of course your age. May God Continue to Bless us.
Hi Becka
I also separated from my partner when my twins where 3 & my oldest was 7 1/2 .
My relationship was different from your's.
I was in an abusive relationship & frightened of him.
I couldn't take it anymore.
I finally found the courage to get him out of our lives for good.
I went out & worked fulltime to provide for my 3 kids.
I had to as he never paid child maintenance to me for his 3 kids.
My house became soo much happier
& the kids were in a much better household.
I also bought my own house.
My family were a great support to me with watching my 3 kids whilst I went to work.
If your relationship isn't working out for whatever reason & you have tried to make it better & it's still not working.
Do not waste anymore of your life on it.
There's a big world out there.
I was scared to on my own with 3 kids to pay the bills etc.
But I did it & so will you.
I wish you & your kids a lovely life .
All the best to you Becka.x
I am so sorry to hear this , but so glad that it was a mutual decision and you are friends and still working together to raise your boys , I really hope both of you find true happiness and continue to be great friends!!! Love to all in this new journey !!!!!
Thank you so much Christine! ♥️ I hope so too, my boys are the most important in all of this.
This is the first video that I watched from you. It came in my feed, and I'm glad it did. Stay strong. You can do this. Everything happens for a reason.
I just found you and subscribed. As a single mom I want to support this journey you are going through. I also appreciate the grace in which you handled this difficult video.
My husband and I separated in December so I know what you're going through. It gets easier as time goes on but it's still hard
Watching you clean really motivates me to get up and go do my bathrooms too, bathrooms always need cleaning. You do a great job.
This is my first time here on your page. I’m so sorry to hear about your separation. I commend you both for coming to a decision together. If things are done, it’s best not to force it and lead down the road to unhappy years. Good for you for doing what’s best for you and your family. ❤
Yes, I wasted 4 years trying to make it work and still ended up divorced. At 57 I truly feel like I wasted valuable time.
never seen your channel before but im proud of you! you seem like a great mother and it's inspiring that youre prioritizing your happiness
I’m sorry this happened to your family, as a fellow divorced woman who has since remarried, you are strong and this is most certainly your time to find yourself as you say. Sitting with your emotions and thoughts is the best thing to come into your own. I am new to your channel but I’m excited to see how you bloom as a person on this new journey. ❤
Omg, heart felt sorry for your situation. So shocked by this. You seemed to have the perfect family. I guess no one ever knows a person's true life. I wish you, your husband and all your family the best and hope you guys all find a way through things. But your a true inspiration. You never fail to impress me with your resilience and fighter determination to carry on. Best wishes to you all.
Thank you so much friend! There is no such thing as perfect, we all have struggles big and small ♥️
It’s great to be transparent and honest with your followers with that being said, I once was told by a professional that divorce should never take place unless there is abuse of any kind, addiction, or betrayal/ cheating in the marriage, any other problems can be worked out through a professional to try to keep the family together. In my circumstance there was alcohol addiction so I had to say good bye to the marriage.
I just discovered your channel a few minutes ago. I love your spirit, your drive and determination. Somehow, I just know that you and your child are going to be just fine. You rock. Peace and Blessings from my family to yours.
Thanks for your courage and openness to share this part of your journey. That is huge! You know this is right for you, and I'm glad you are willing to share and receive support from all of us.
Cleaning and redecorating can help so much with the healing process. When I left a 3-year relationship in my 20s (entirely different scale, I know), I almost entirely lost my appetite and ended up doing an intuitive 7-day fast where I ate only a snack or two every day. Fasting can be unhealthy depending on your mindset and history, but for me it felt like a way to devote all my energy to healing, and it felt like an expedited emotional healing process. At the end of that week, I was shocked at how ready I felt to move forward with freedom and joy.
I also looked up a whole bunch of Meetup groups, and made sure to meet new people. The kinds of people I wanted to become friends with were different than the kinds of people I had gravitated to in the past, and in making new friends, I learned more about who I was now wanting to become as a person.
Hi Becka I stumbled across your channel and you got this. I got married later than most people at the age of 32. I was married for maybe 3 1/2 years and I left my husband. I was 35 when I left. There wasn’t any hate or anything between us. I literally had to start over. I was ok with that though. I never dreamed I would meet the man I’m truly in love with 2 1/2 years later. I’ve been married for 11 years this year. I just turned 50 in February and I am so blessed and thankful I had the courage to make a change. You will go through all different feelings but it will make you stronger in the long run. Take care
Everyone I know has been married in their 30's. People are doing that now. I was 32. My sister was 30. My mom was 30. I have a neighbor who is getting married for the first time in July and she is 62. I have a coworker who was 40. People don't subscribe to the pressure to marry young anymore. It's about what is right for you.
I got married to my 1st husband when I was 19 back in the 1980’s. I went in blindly and both of us very immature. I didn’t know myself let alone him. Married almost 16 years and got divorced. 3 years after that I did meet someone who I respected and he respected me. He loved my children and we have a god centered life ❤.
My husband is very abusive verbally. This video was meant for me.
Thank you for having the courage and grace to film and discuss this.
Life is too short. Hope you find the strength when the time is right
I’m so sorry, this breaks my heart. You’re worth so much more and don’t believe his lies ♥️
Leave him he's damaged ❤❤ he won't change narsasist never do xx
I'm so sorry to hear about this! I went through the same thing years ago, and it was one of the most difficult times of my life. What I learned was to give myself time to grieve, not to rush it, and to not suppress my hurt and anger. You have to live in that moment, and take things as they come. One day at a time. Prayers for all of you!
I'm glad you had time to process your emotions in a healthy way after your separation. Going through a good home clean was uplifting to see and hear. Thank you for this video. Also have an fun new journey even though it may seem hard at times, you are doing great as a mother. Keep up on your new journey! And keep the new content comming! This was my first video watch and I loved to see you bring some life back after a loss.
Big hugs mama... You got this! 🧸 Life always works out how it's meant to in the end and there is a reason for everything. Here for all the motivation!!
Thank you so much girl for your sweet words and I think you’re right ♥️
I agree 100 percent! Life happens just how it should. Everything is for a reason. Always look for the positive in situations 💙
God hates Divorce
My heart goes out to you! I was in the same position a few months ago except he had left the house 2 days after I came home from visiting family and celebrating my birthday. In my case, I had tried to make it work up until he was gone but he drove off and I had to clear the house. It’s never easy, and healing isn’t linear. My heart goes out to you! It gets better 🫶🏼
I am in your position, with 3 kids and haven't worked since our 3 year old was born. He left a literal mess, along with a financial mess, for me to clean up. It has been an extreme struggle mentally, physically, and financially. I am envious of her strength and mindset. God bless you both.
Being in a good relationship with yourself is the best role model for your kids, whether you are with someone or not. Wishing you so much for this new chapter in your life!
Much prayers to you and your boys. Just remember to take time for yourself. Also let your oldest help as much as he wants.
There was something very touching about seeing you find a place for the cuddlecup as one of the first things you rearranged; I can tell you that keeping all forms of sweet, uncomplicated love close by was vital for me when going through the separation from more complicated love. Although it may not feel like it at times, you are never completely separated from love that's still around you, and that still comes from you. Stay well : )
Everyone handles their situation differently as it is unique to them. I will tell you everyone loves a great comeback story!!! You’ve got tons of content to film now for sure! Get ready with me videos where you are showing self care would be fun.
Yes ma'am. I'd love to join along with someone's journey of ***Self love & Finding & Loving Yourself right here you are if anyone has any recommendations of channels like this I would greatly appreciate knowing*** tia
Thank you for being so brave and sharing what you are going through with your community. Hopefully finding yourself gets easier each day, everyone deserves to be happy. Take care.
You're doing great hun, I've been thru this myself, things get easier, just remember we all allowed bad days and a bad day doesnt mean a bad life,I have "mini" meltdowns every now and again still and I allow myself them knowing I will pick myself up again in a couple of hours (this is all I allow myself lol) ,just a wee tip about shower curtains ,I actually put 2 up ,my expensive one to the front then I hang a cheap white one at the back of it ,this is the one that gets wet and I throw out when the mildew stains it and replace with another cheap one , that way my "good one" only needs the odd freshen up , wishing you all the very best for the new chapter of youre life x
Great idea! Thanks ❤
Becka, how are you really? Please take care of yourself during this new season of your life. I'm praying for many blessings to come your way! Keep up the great job!
My wife and myself wish you all the best, we have both been through the same thing. It takes quite a while to start again but it will get easier bit by bit. Cheers from Melbourne, Australia
Period! Love to see a woman moving on to better things❤
yes i feel ya girl blessings on your healing journey
I had a friend that was going through the same thing I was….having her to share things with and talk to saved me.
This is my first time here, but I’ll definitely be here to watch more! A divorce and separation are always hard. But embrace finding yourself. It brings so much peace to your soul. It’s an odd thing to go through grief of the separation but also having excitement for what’s to come. However it’s an amazing thing to be able to see the light in the dark. ❤
Sorry to hear yall are going through this! You Got this, Prayers for yall 🙏 ❤️
Congrats on putting you first!!! Coming from a divorced mom of twins (they were 6 at the time), the trauma of divorce even when it's the right choice is real. Our situations are very similar in that it wasn't extenuating circumstances, but it still took quite a bit of time and self-love to get me to totally me. One day at a time. Mom's work at this twice in tandem... once as a woman and once as a caregiver of their little humans. Be easy on yourself ♥️
I wish you all the best in your new life! I'm a single mum of three now adult kids (also a grandma) and when the father of my kids left it was not easy but at the same time a big releave for all of us. A big hugh from Switzerland, i like your videos and your choice of music!
Thank you Eva ♥️ I’m so sorry to hear of your heart break, but glad things got better for you.
You've got this. I'm going through this myself. Unfortunately for me, he left a much bigger mess for me to clean up. But onward and upward. Keep doing what you are doing. It will get better. I too have been trying to re-find myself. I'm getting there. Much happier now than before.
Becka, Hugs sent your way. I am so glad that you are going to use this time to "rediscover" yourself. That is the most important thing you can do for you. Take the time to figure out who you are and what you want for you.
Thank you friend ♥️ I honestly feel like I have lost myself so much that I don’t know anymore, so I am excited to rediscover a new me.
1st time here and applaud you for your strength, honesty, maturity and your account of your situation. Because this is a time for you to consider yourself, separate from your husband and moving forward, make time to take up or explore new interests or a hobby, have fun! You have a great outlook and attitude. Your children are very lucky, to have a mom like you!
Hey Becka
I know the decision was not a easy one. It never is. You and Chris made the right choice for your family. Not everyone’s path is the same. You are a strong and amazing woman.
Thank you Pamela ♥️ Yes this decision was not made lightly and was considered for a long time until it was all that was left to consider.
Wonder if the children got a vote in the situation? Everyone thinks they can move on to a new relationship and things be great. When you put people into your life because you suddenly need a man, they never love your children like your previous spouse. The stepchildren are a hated part of the new relationship equation.
My children are my top priority and I have no intentions of getting into a relationship with anyone but myself for a long time. This is my healing journey, and if that day ever came I assure you if anyone EVER treated my children less than, they would immediately be out of my life.
@Happily Ever Becka If your top priority were the children, you would find a way to make it work without a divorce. It cannot be about you ever, until those children are grown. A stepmother 2 street over from us locks her stepchildren out till she comes home. Somewhere there is love because you have children together, now work it out.
I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree because I think it’s more important for my children to see their parents happy and thriving rather then miserable. Btw if a stepmom ever did that to my children I would be in handcuffs afterwards, I will make it very well known that situations like that would never be tolerated. But to be honest I trust my children’s father enough to know he would never let something like that happen in his home to his children. Very sad for those children that went through that.
Sending you peace, energy and good vibes. Good for you for cleaning and organizing and reclaiming your space. And as someone else commented, how nice that you didn't disparage or blame your husband in any way.
Becka, I'm so sorry to hear this. I've been through it several times, and it's very hard. You're a strong young lady, and you will get through this! Make sure to take care of yourself. Sending hugs to you and your children. 😊 💕❤️
Thank you friend! I’m sorry you’ve been through this too ♥️ It’s definitely not easy navigating this new journey.
It’s good you are moving forward. It will be so good for your heart and mind. I pray that each day gets a little easier.
First time here,I subscribed because I want to support a single mama any way I can. My mama was a single mama of 4 who battled cancer yet still was a warrior til her last breath 3 years ago. She never put our father down even through his infidelity issues. We were able to grow our own emotions towards our sperm donor. You're doing AMAZING and your respect for the father of your children reminds me so much of her.
First time here and I’ve been there…. I want to support you because you are showing such grace and strength through a very hard time so I’m subscribing. Just know there will be ups and downs, and you are worthy, not just as a Mom but as a woman. It took me a long time to figure that out but it looks like you’re already on the right track.
A very cathartic thing to do. Symbolically (and literally) cleaning out the negative energy from a bad experience. Blessings.
I got divorced when my kids were little and of course put them first - I’m sure you are doing the same 🥰 don’t put yourself last though and make sure you find things each day that bring you joy 😊
Thank you Helen ♥️ Yes very well said and exactly what I’m trying to do.
I’m glad you didn’t lose your home. The final move out is always hard not leaving those spaces empty is a good move. I’m sorry you lost each other it’s a sad thing when you realise you love but your no longer in love with each other it’s a loss like no other. My best advice is don’t fightback the tears etc the storm clears quicker when you don’t it’s an important part of the healing process.
Hi, just found your video today. I think I’ll stick around 😊 Sorry you’re going through such a rough time, marriage is hard. But you are doing what is right for you, and that’s what matters most. Hang in there, I’ll be watching from here on out.
So sorry for what you are going through. Been there too. And you will find yourself again I promise!! You have to take care of yourself!! Sending you much love and encouragement!
So many of us have been thru this same situation. You are not alone. Your content is great and I will continue to support your channel. Keep looking ahead and trust your judgment ❤
I am sad to hear that. I pray that everyone adjusts and finds their happy space and new normal as quickly as possible. Thanks for being transparent and brave enough to share. It really helps others that are going through the same situations.
Love & prayers for you and your family during this time of change.💜
Wow ..honey your NOT ALONE!!THERE IS NO PAIN OIKE LOSING SOMEONE AND GRIEVING WHILE THEY ARE STILL ALIVE. .. I LOVE YOU AND I SHARE THIS STRUGGLE. VALIDATION FOR EVERYTHING THAT HURTS. KEEP MOVING FORWARD EVEN IF YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE IT. YOU ARE VERY MATURE AND I APPRECIATE YOU SHARING THIS STRENGTH. TODAY IS A HUGE DAY FOR YOU PROVING JUST HOW STRONG YOU ARE TO YOURSELF.
Becka, you got this Girl Friend. I am here anytime for you. Love and prayers for you both and the kids. 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚
*I appreciate your transparency. May this day and the days ahead be filled with immense healing and abundance! The absence of a partner that you’ve been with for a very long time brings on a flood of emotions. Take one day at a time. 💜*
Got you in my recommended. Whatever you are going through you will be overcome and be stronger for it. You are a force to be reckoned with as you do your cleaning, and so you shall also be in whatever life throws at you. I hope things get better and this decision gives you the peace and happiness that you deserve. 💕
First time watching your programming. Your post popped up in my feed. Such a wonderfully peaceful transition video. The cleaning seemed cathartic, and your tone didn't sound stressful or irritated by the situation you're in. I am praying for you both to continue in the path you're following out of what can be a difficult season. You certainly have a beautiful home and lovely spaces to live in. ❤️
Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way! As long as you have your kids, you have everything!
You’re so right Lola! They are all that matters to me 🥰
Honestly did the same thing when one of my exs moved out I bought new furniture got rid of the bed we slept on etc now I have better furniture anyway and I’m so much happier with a new man and home I can be proud of we all cope differently but doing things for yourself is the key ❤ make yourself the most important Xx
Aw, Becka! I’m so sorry about your marriage.😔 At the same time, I’m so glad that you’re in a place where you are doing well (better, anyway), where you can start fresh and create a new and beautiful life for yourself and your boys!❤
Thank you ♥️ It’s been hard but I’m settling in to finding myself again which gives me a lot of hope for the future.
@@HappilyEverBecka: You’re in my prayers, hun! You’ve got this!❤️🙏🏾❤️
And that’s how you do it !!! You just cleared away the negative heavy energy from your space making it a fresh new starting point which will bring in peace and abundance my dear…. Well done, be excited for all that’s coming for you next 💚
I'm so sorry you're going through this. HUGS This is my first video to your channel and I subscribed. There's not a lot you can do but feel the feelings, but distractions help a lot. Turning those spaces into YOUR spaces is a wonderful start. You're on the right track. Wishing you the best. ♥ ♥
Oh my God I'm sorry but this has got to be the best cleanup I've ever watched because of the subject title. I could watch these all day getting rid of the negative aroma in the air! I hope you feel it with happy juju! :-) I'm all about it!
TYSM for sharing this with the community. Just know that you are supported and though I do not personally know what you are going through I can send you healing prayers and relaxing vibes through the internet.
Hi! I’m brand new and subscribed to both your channels. I’m so impressed by you! I’m a 75 year old woman who was divorced after 12 years of marriage. I have now been with my second husband for 43 years. My advice is to try to keep to a routine, especially with children, and also make sure you get your rest. Good luck, hon, and I’ll be watching and catching up on your videos. ❤️
Let me just say how brave you are to share this. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Being married in the military is so hard. Praying for you , your kids and your husband.
Hugs. It's never easy to close one chapter and open another even if closing one was on good terms, it's still hard to start over. I am sure you guys will be happier for the choices your making now before it got to a point of ugly. You will always have my support for your videos :)! I am not quite sure how this youtube thing works but I will even watch the ads right through if that helps support your channel :)
New to channel. Do what makes you happy. If you're happy, your babies will be happy. I used an entire can of Comet on just my bathroom sink when my ex and I separated. You got this!!
Hi, Becka! I know these are hard times but we're here for you. I'm a silent subscriber since then and I'm saddened by the news. But life goes on anyways. We have to move on. Stay strong momma! You're brave sharing about it to the world. You're a beautiful and strong momma to your kids. Don't worry, we'll still gonna support all the way no matter what your contents are. Looking forward to your fresh start on a new journey. Please do still make vlogs if you're gonna have a new job. More like of a "life of a working mom" video. Always keep safe! Much love from the Philippines! :)
Been there, remember to look after yourself. Your health, mental and physical are the best to offer to yourself and your children. I made my bedroom over too, it was awesome. Painted my walls, made it feel so new and fresh. Your beautiful, smart and kind. Each day does get better.
So sorry you’re going through this! Even if it is for the best; definitely not an easy transition. Appreciate the video and your vulnerability. 🙏🏼❤️
Ohhhh I loved cleaning after my ex Narc left!!!...What a relief!!....the house was almost empty...he took over the entire house. It felt so good to throw out left overs & put the music blasted and dance as I cleaned...fresh new start. .I re painted..re decorated...I loved it!!
Circle the date a year from now on your calendar. Everything will be totally settled and you will be even more relieved to have gotten it all over with.
Love this idea, thank you for this ♥️
@@HappilyEverBecka I gave this to a friend as an idea when she was going through a divorce and the amount of decisions were overwhelming. We not only circled the date but made a plan for a little girls getaway for the same time frame to have something happy to look forward to. Best wishes.
You sound like an incredible friend! I’m sure your friend appreciated how you showed up for them ♥️
@@HappilyEverBecka Thank you. I try..
So sorry to hear this. Stay positive, stay busy, just breathe. Prayers coming your way for you and your family.
I’ve been in your shoes and it’s a scary place. ❤ you’re all in my prayers. The best advice from personal experience is , 1. You and the kids dad keep showing up for the kids and being there for them.
2. Don’t talk bad about your ex in front of the kids, 3. Give yourself at least a year before you start dating , 4. Not sure of your faith, but for me, finding a biblically sound church was so important.
I wish you so much future happiness!!! You’ll get through this!
Thank you Tanya, I appreciate you giving me some advice ♥️ I defiantly will be implementing all of those. Him and I both just want the best for the kids, so we won’t be saying anything about each other and we’ll be cordial around one another. Very grateful for that through this.
Take a breath girl, you got this! Sending love and support.
Sending love and hugs your way. I am going through the same and it's unbelievably tough, but us ladies are/can be so 💪 strong!
P.s.. I was eyeing up the rug thinking how lovely it was the entire time, I wish I could have sneaked into your trash and took it for me 😄 🤣 haha
What is the hardest part??
Proud of you for taken time for yourself to heal ! Remember you are Strong and Beautiful Blessed be !!
You are not alone in this. I wish you much luck and success wherever your journey takes you.🥰
What a great example for your children you two are!!!
First time here. Just be mindful of your feelings in every step so you're sure that what you're doing is good for you. I think when we spend so much time thinking from the "We" it can be rough to take decisions as an individual again. Obviously your kids will always be first, I'm talking about this moment of getting to know yourself again as a single person. It's very brave what you're doing, choosing happiness. And it's a great example for your children. Thank you for sharing.
Hi Becka, so sorry to hear your news, sometimes we have to do what’s right for us as much as it hurts 😢😢
Sending huge hugs and love to you from Western Australia xxx 💜🦋💜
Thank you Rachel, you are very right. Some of life’s decisions are so hard but we know this is right.
I am so behind, I’ve been busy with my mom at MD Anderson and her treatments. I’m sorry about the separation, people change, it is rough. I wish you all the best. I can totally relate, I’m have been everything to everyone so long that if someone asked me what I want, what I like, or what I want to be when I grow up (lol) all I would know to say is I don’t know! Some times you have to choose you ! And that is hard to do when your mom and wife a grandma, a daughter a sister a aunt, etc and everyone needs you. My advice is go with it! Enjoy you! Celebrate you! Your a rock star!
I have been where you are now. I became homeless with a 4 year old and lost my job because we lived on base and ran my daycare. Not sure how I made it work. My son is now 26 and is a loving, strong and over all pleasant human being. One piece of unasked for advice would be always always put the kids first and never let anyone get in the way of that. There’s so much child abuse that goes on, that as parents we should try to never use them against the other and be open with your ex. I believe it is when we argue and fight over stupid stuff or use the Childers to get back at the other is when others see what we don’t and then our children are at risk. When we allow other partners be involved in the co-parenting we are putting our kids at risk.
If the child or children want to see the other parent even if it isn’t “their time” let them. Because it’s not you getting hurt, it’s the kids. When the parents can truly co-parent then no one else outside of them should be making decisions. No one outside of the parents should feel like they have a say so in raising the kids. This is not to say that someday their might me another step parent and they can’t help. It’s just to say that the parents are the ones that should be making decisions on behalf of their children. Talk to your kids and be open. Make sure they know what’s right and what wrong when it comes to adult behavior. This is new to them and things are done differently, but they should know what’s right and what’s wrong. I do hope you succeed with RUclips.., I’m gonna subscribe and like your videos. I don’t even know what kind of content you make 😂
Hi Becka, just wanted to say you're very brave to speak about what going on with you. Keep pressing forward, praying and staying positive. God will give you all the grace& strength you need. I'm glad you guys are still in a good place. Live your life and do what makes you happy.
Marriage takes work. Instead of trying to rediscover why they fell in love in the beginning, they just flush it down the toilet. The real ones that suffer are the children. They will realize it in the future the mistakes made. She even orders him to leave the mess so she can make a video, good grief. Not sure why I was shown this in my video feed, not for me.
Congrats for taking your life back. Been there. Sorry about the separation ...better days ahead. Don't look back. Keep moving forward. Cleaning house always gave me a sense of freedom, especially after a break up. Looks like you're doing great! I commend you for taking a stand! 🙏👍👏 This is my first time being here. Life goes on and breakups happen for a reason. I'm happy now and you will be too!
I couldn’t watch the whole video. I began to cry. I am praying for you and your hubby. ❤