Whether you’re 13, 25, or any age in between, we’re here to take on anything and everything: sex, sexuality, housing, mental health, self-harm, body positivity - if you've got a question, we'll look to explore it and help. As of 2020, for new videos on new topics every month, subscribe to The Mix: ruclips.net/user/TheMixUK
My GP isn't understanding and has even made me cry before on more than one occasion. I've been self harming for 17 years and no one has ever offered to help me or wanted me to talk about it. I don't ask for help anymore, it's just not worth it. Nobody wants to take the time to listen or even try to understand.
I would take as much time as you need. I'm not a psychologist but I promise you.. I will listen! I've gone through a lot of things, so I know what you are talking about. Drop me an e-mail whenever you like. (my.adrian.fogarty@gmail.com) If not, stay strong!
well the U.S or were i live think people who cut need to go to therapy but all the therapists and mine make it all about them but thats just were i live
The first time I self harmed and told my therapist about it, she immediately started trying to put me in inpatient treatment. I repeatedly told her that I was not suicidal nor did I want to harm anyone else. Instead of trying to work with me to stop gradually, she made me sign a contract to never do it again at all and if I did, she had permission to have me committed. Of course all this did was make me afraid to be honest with her. I believe she completely over reacted since it was my first time and had no history of it or being suicidal in the past
Wow... She overreacted a lot I would honestly see a new therapist that you can be open and honest with. Mine only told my mom. Stay strong your worth a lot
Thats an overraction id say to leave her honetly if she does that its stupid unless lit was like fat/ mucle which u would need to go to the hospital for (stitches) she had no right to do that forcing you to sign that contrat was a real asshole move on her part
When i used to self harm (i don't anymore) i told my friend as she had gone through the same thing and i thought she would understand. But she didn't believe me, got me to show her my cuts and then said i was attention seeking, a faker and that i wasnt even "cutting properly" like wtf? That was last year, and those words still hurt :(
Yes, but not anything as advanced as this, that I know of. Here, it's more 'looked down' upon by doctors and society and very few ppl that struggle with SH (that I know of) have found help by going to a doctor.
The first GP i saw laughed when i said i was self harming. Can u actually believe that? I went to see a different one who basically said i was a normal teenager and it was my hormones. 2 years and a suicide attempt later.... i wonder if he still thinks that its hormones!
My GP I see about mental illness issues and SI is really lovely, non judgemental gone to get wounds looked at and stuff and she was great about it all, she is a great help. There are doctors out there that do generally care and show it, just a matter of finding them. I am Australian btw.
Hi Kirsty, Thanks for your comments. Talking to a health professional can really help you to express your feelings and we're really pleased to hear you had the confidence to go and see your GP after seeing this. All the best.
Hi. If you’re under 16, things are a little bit more uncertain and different doctors surgeries can have different policies. The best thing to do is to ask the receptionist or your doctor to explain their confidentiality policy to you before you tell them anything. If you have any more questions get in touch with askTheSite, our confidential question and answer service or visit the site.org and take a look at our self-harm section Take Care Rob@TheSite
I don’t self harm anymore, but when I used to back in January 2012, I didn’t have any friends whatsoever to turn to. I don’t have any now either but I talked to my Business Studies teacher at college and my close friend and he helped me through it. You just need to talk to someone who you trust I’d say.
My psychiatrist just gives me med and asks me a few questions then I leave. My friends self harm and when I tell my counselor she tells me I need to mind my own business and if she wants to get help she’ll get help. But when my friend goes and told her when I do it she’ll call my mom and will send me the hospital
Hi there, Sorry to hear that you struggle with self-harm. It’s good that you see a psychiatrist and a counsellor (and I hope you find it helpful). I also understand it must be difficult for you when you tell your counsellor that your friends self-harm but are told she must get help for herself, and yet when a friend tells your counsellor that you are self-harming, you get a phone call to your mom. It may be that your counsellor is trying to look out for you and is doing what they feel is best for you. If you’d like, feel free to check out our article on self-harm coping tips www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html which can be useful when you feel the urge to self-harm. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I started sh in May 2022 and I told my doctor about it a week ago, I first told my sister about my sh and then told my doctor last week. It was very hard for me because I felt all the guilt. I started to break down while explaining it and my doctor gave me a sticky note with the crisis hotline and some other services such as other websites.
Hi there, It takes a lot of courage to open up about self-harm, but we are glad you did! It’s also good to know that your doctor gave you information about hotlines and services too. If you are looking for ways to deal with self-harm, you might want to check out our article on steps to self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html If you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, you can also sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Take care, Maisy@TheMix
I'm 15 I went to my doctor about my SH and a whole list of other mental shit and I've been referred to a psychiatrist and a psychologist. It was my first time going into the doctors office on my own and she was great I told her my mum doesn't know I SH and she has kept it between us To any other younger people who are afraid to go, it's really not as scary as it seems, and try going to a younger doctor, sometimes they understand a bit more than older practitioners do, in my experience.
@superman2ify Yes, in the UK a 14 year old can go and visit a GP and talk to them in confidence about self-harm. Here's a useful snippet from the NHS Code of Practice on Confidentiality (2003) ... “Children under the age of 16 who have the capacity and understanding to take decisions about their own treatment are also entitled to make decisions about the use and disclosure of information they have provided in confidence.” You should feel confident about talking to your GP about your feelings.
@superman2ify If you still have questions, we run askTheSite a confidential Q&A service where you can message your questions to one of our advisors. You can also ask a question in our moderated discussion forum which is a really useful place to get good advice. Just Google, 'askthesite' or 'thesite: discussion forum'. Take care. Chris @ TheSite.org
i wanna go talk to my doctor cause i think about ending my life 24/7 but that cofidental is bullshit ik withg what i would tell my dr he would call the cops an lock me up in a mental hospital that aint happening so i prolly wont ever get help my only way out is death an even if i were to seek help it wouldnt work u need a great attitude for help to work and i have a horrible 1
In many time of my life ive harmed myself but have pulled through it, but still sometimes have thoughts. there are two ways You can either do it or let the pain pass
Hi there, Thank you for commenting and sharing your experiences with us! I’m sorry to hear that you have previously harmed yourself, and though you’ve managed to get through it, that you still sometimes get thoughts to self-harm. You are right though that you can try to let the pain pass (as it usually does). But sometimes it can be difficult to deal with the thoughts and try to resist harming yourself. You might want to check out our article on dealing with urges to self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html for more ideas on how to deal with those urges without self-harming. If you are in the UK, and under 25, and would like a safe place to chat and get support from other young people, feel free to join our discussion boards: community.themix.org.uk/ You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ is a forum dedicated to supporting those who are managing and recovering from self-harm. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I’m scared that my mom will yell at me, she SCREAMED. At me when I told her that I wanted to die. If I tell my counselor then she’s forced to tell her and I don’t want her to. I feel like it’s dumb that the first thing they have to do is tell your parents because I feel like sooo many lives could be saved if that wasn’t the case, there are many people in my situation and some people lose their battle all because they didn’t feel comfortable talking to someone.
Hey there, I’m sorry to hear how your mom reacted when you told her you wanted to die. It makes sense that you would be concerned about how she would handle news of self-harming. It can also make things seem unfair when your counsellor has to tell your parents, when you feel this only worsens the situation. However, counsellors have a duty of care to protect you and they may feel that it is necessary to break confidentiality to help keep you safe. Many parents react differently to finding out their child is struggling with self-harm or suicidal thoughts. They may be concerned and scared, and unfortunately, this may look like they are angry with us. If you plan on confiding in your mom or your counsellor and are worried about your mom’s reaction, you might want show her our top tips on what to do when someone tells you they self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/5-tips-if-someone-tells-you-theyre-self-harming-28639.html If you would like more support, feel free to sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ If you want to talk to someone, there’s always the Crisis Text Line: www.crisistextline.org/ Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Could someone please help me? I am suffering with self-harm and depression, and I don't know who to tell. In the video, they said you should tell someone you trust, but what happens if you don't trust anyone? I know I could go to my GP, but my social anxiety kicks in, leading me to not go. I'm only 12, soon 13, and it's not like I can just go to the doctors about it. Please help me...
I know how hard it can be, but honestly, once you tell someone who cares for you it is a relief. I understand how you feel with the whole doctors and social anxiety thing. I hope you find someone to confide in, I know its never easy! I told my mom, but I'm not sure its as easy for you. Do you have any close friends you may be able to talk to or a guidance counsellor at school? I hope things get better, I'll be thinking about you!
RiviRose Thankyou, I really do hope there are more people in the world like you. And no, I don't have any friends at this present moment in time, I don't have anyone. I do have a school counsellor, but I am too affraid to step up and say 'I need help', thing are getting out of control, I'm just bottling it up. I hope you feel better, too. Thankyou for your kind words xoxo
HeyImMadi I'm jenna , and just read your comment . Okay so , I'm 14 and I've been self harming for 2 to 3 years now , but actually stopped 2 months and 4 days ago . My problem is , is that I didn't go to anyone for help . My advice to you is to go to your parents immediately because they are the ones that care so so so much about you . It's going to be so scary to confront them about it but trust me , everything gets better . You can do this , just ask to talk to them for a few minutes and let it out . Okay ? It will be tough but you can do it , don't let this self harm get in the way anymore . Make it stop . Stay strong , you're beautiful .
Hey there, I’m sorry to hear that you self-harm. It’s understandable that you would feel you had to hide your cuts when having a wellness check. But remember that health professionals are there to help and they shouldn’t be judgemental. Don’t let these worries get in the way of reaching out for support! If you’d like, feel free to check out our article on alternatives to self-harm: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you are under 25 and in the UK, you can also join our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. Alternatively, RecoverYourLife is also available: www.recoveryourlife.com/ All the best, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Whether it's gp or psychiatrist they are the same. They dont care. They are not care.. And they just talk super long to drag the time so that they can get more money ok! Mayb one or two r gd but most of them just dont care.
I'm lucky I go to a youth clinic for mental health and my doctor understands the difficulties... Though she saw my scars the first time 2 weeks ago... which had her reacted and then she ended up patching my wounds a couple days ago... I think you just need to find the right doctor.. She admitted when she started out as a GP she use to get angry and didn't understand it... But says now she treats it like anything else... I'm truly thankful for the relationship my doctor and I have.
this vid gave me the conifdance to see my gp, he was nice he refurd me to a pshothapist , i just want to say thank you to this video i now know i have high depression, he did ask me to see the cuts but i just plyed this video in my head .. thankyouu
I started crying my eyes out when she said tell someone who would react positively... because no one I told has.. my cousin didnt care my bestfriend told me to just stop like it was the easiest thing in the world my parents told me I was ruining the temple of God and that it was because of all the things i like and made me promise never to do it again even tho I still do... and my other friend kept trying to force me to show him my cuts. Everyone I have ever tried to tell either didnt care or forced me to do something that made me feel worse. And I'm too scared to talk to a stranger about it because I'm socially awkward with strangers. So yeah I'm fucked. YUPEEEE
Hi there, It was really brave of you to open up to others about your self-harm. Unfortunately, sometimes people may not know how to react when you tell them about your self-harm. For example, when your best friend told you to stop, it may be that they do care about you and would like you to stop self-harming but may not realise how difficult it can be to stop self-harming. The same goes for your parents who tell that you are ‘ruining the temple of God’ and blame it on the things you like. They too may care (they feel you are harming your body) but may not know how what they say comes across to you as not caring. It seems like self-harm is something you struggle with. If that’s the case, you might want to check out our articles on self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html and coping tips and distractions www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you decide you would like to talk to someone in your life about your self-harm, you may want to check out (and send to those you tell) this article on supporting someone who self-harms www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/supporting-someone-who-self-harms-5690.html I understand you don’t feel comfortable telling strangers about your self-harm, but if you are between the ages of 13-25 and in the UK, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to vent and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support with our understanding and non-judgemental team. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ forums dedicated to recovering from self-harm. Take care and stay strong, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I am 16 and I regurly self harm. My best friend offered to go to the gp with me BUT my nan and aunt both work for the NHS and have access to the database. So would it be put on a file visible to other NHS employees?
I've seen three doctors, four different counsellors and been on antidepressants and nothing has worked. It seems like there's no way to fix it, I asked for a diagnosis so I knew what I was dealing with and got nothing. I don't like going to the doctors as it is and all the times they've failed me has meant I totally refuse to go now even though I'm getting worse. They couldn't even fix non-mental health problems.
My GP doesn't even make eye contact with me when I visit about self-harm, depression, suicidal thoughts, dropping out of university due to anxiety... Just prescribes generic anti-depressants and sends me on my way. Can't say he's done me much good, to be honest.
@awesome1est93 Hi there, thanks for your comment. If you would like to discuss these issues in confidence, we run both a forum (Google: 'thesite boards') and AskTheSite (Google: 'askthesite'), where you can ask other young people and experts about self-harm and the feelings you're experiencing. It's a really good community of users and you'll be made to feel very welcome. Take care, Chris @ TheSite.org
Yeah, because I mean yeah it good to talk and all but it's really hard and then for your mum to find out it's even worse personally my mum gets really angry.
Hey there, It’s always scary opening up about your struggles, more so if you are unsure of how the other person may react and especially if you are concerned you will get a negative reaction. You might want to check out our article on telling someone you self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/telling-someone-you-self-harm-5682.html for ideas on who to talk to and how to deal with their reactions. If you are still dealing with self-harm, feel free to check out our self-harm coping tips article www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html as well as our dealing with urges to self-harm article www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html If you are under 25 and in the UK, you can also sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to recovering from self-harm. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Zainab Heavan yes. Self harm is not always bleeding for example I self harm but don’t bleed just enough to cause pain and discomfort. I don’t have scars but self harming is just when you hurt yourself in any way. Hope this helps but if you haven’t already tell someone and get some help before it progresses to worse. X
@cdsmith1990 Thanks for your comments. Have you considered changing doctor? You are entitled to request another doctor from the PCT if you aren't satisfied with the service from the one you have. We have an article about this... Google, "TheSite.org GPs: the alternatives". Hope this helps. Take care, Chris @ TheSite.org
i used to self harm pretty much every day. its less often now, but i still feel the need to do it, i just know the consiquences. i went to see my gp a few weeks ago (not because of self harming- it was another matter) but i had counselling for my self harming (i didn't like the woman so i quit after a few weeks) so it was on my record. when she saw it she wanted to talk about it, but when you're talking to someone like that they're constantly anylising you. it makes you feel patronised & judged
Hey there, You might want to check out our article on self-harm and confidentiality www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/confidentiality-and-self-harm-5685.html While we are aimed at young people living in the UK, it may be similar to other places. Generally, any age under the age of legal adulthood (in some places that is 18) may require a professional to break confidentiality, but this is often due to other factors such as being at serious risk for suicide or there is a risk of abuse at home. However, even if a professional feels they need to break confidentiality about your self-harm, try not to let this put you off from visiting a health professional. They are there to help you and would only break confidentiality to allow you to get the help and support you need. Take care, Maisy@TheMix
The thing is with seeing someone is that it's a gamble you have to be lucky to get the right person or it can make it worse and that's why I'm so afraid to ask for help because I have no guarantee of seeing someone who won't judge me
Hi there, It’s understandable that you’d feel that way about accessing mental health services when there may be a stigma. Unfortunately, there are some cases where people have asked for help regarding mental health only to have felt invalidated later on. However, that doesn’t mean to say that you are guaranteed to have such a response. Thankfully, there is an increased awareness of mental health, particularly in young people, and so we can hope that professionals will be more informed and understanding of their patients. Try not to let the risk of talking to a professional who doesn’t understand stop you from reaching out. Worst case scenario, you can always try getting a second opinion- hopefully from someone with more understanding! If you’d like more support, and you are between the ages of 13-25, and live in the UK, feel free to reach out to us at our online community community.themix.org.uk/ You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I started sh like 5 years ago and just told a trustworthy person. However I am still scared because I feel like I'm just being an attention seeker but I want to get help so I can feel good again
Hi there, Well done on talking to someone about your self-harm. That can be a really difficult step to take but it’s also an important one too. It’s understandable that you might be concerned about being an attention seeker but often times there are reasons as to why you started self-harming and the fact that you do want to stop and feel better suggests that you are not just seeking attention. You’ve already completed one of the first steps on the journey to recovering from self-harm. For more information on recovering from self-harm, you might want to check out our article here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html If you’d like more support, and you live in the UK and are between the ages of 13-25, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is also RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/ a website dedicated to supporting those who self-harm in their recovery. Take care, Maisy@TheMix
Michelle, everybody deserves to live. Yoh just need to stay strong and keep fighting. As a former self harmer, I know it’s hsrd but keep fighting. I’m sorry. That’s the only advice hat I can give you that helped me. Stay strong and keep fighting.
When I went to the doctor they just asked to see them I wanted to refuse but I wanted to get it over with cause I have bad nervousness And then they just told me a site to go on and sign up to speak to a Councellor in person and on call... They just ask the same questions And that's it No explaining feelings Just answering questions and it actually makes it worse. Stay strong xx
Hey there, It can definitely be very nerve wracking when you are asked to show your self-harm scars to anyone, particularly when it comes to doctors and other professionals. Sometimes doctors may not know how to help when it comes to mental health or self-harm and while suggesting a site to go on may have been useful, you may also want to see if you can be referred to mental health care for more specific support. Talking to a counsellor can help, although people may have different experiences as it can depend on a lot of factors such as whether you trust your counsellor and feel motivated to give counselling a chance and also the type of counselling provided. If you feel it’s not been helpful for you, then you might want to consider letting the counsellor know so that other options can be explored. If you are looking for support with self-harm, you might want to check out our article on steps to recovering from self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html as well as our self-harm coping tips and distractions article www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you are in the UK, and between the ages of 13-25, you are also more than welcome to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to vent and get support from other young people or contact our team www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there’s always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to managing and recovering from self-harm. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Hey there, I’m sorry to hear that your GP said you would grow out of your shyness, and yet, you haven’t. Unfortunately, GPs don’t always know best when it comes to development or mental health. Shyness can be ‘normal’ for some such as those who are introverted, while for others, shyness may actually be anxiety which can cause problems in someone’s life. Whether or not ‘shyness’ is a problem depends on how you feel about it. The same goes for not mixing with other children. For some this may just be part of who they are, and for others, it may be for other reasons such as autism. Again, the only thing that separates it from being considered a ‘problem’ is how you feel about it. If you’d like more information on shyness, feel free to check out our article here: www.themix.org.uk/sex-and-relationships/friendship/shyness-3326.html We also have an article on social anxiety too: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/anxiety-ocd-and-phobias/coping-with-social-anxiety-29093.html For more support, if you are in the UK and under 25, feel free to sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
If you are under 18, is it possible to get therapy without having your parents know?probably not right...I want to tell my guidance consuleor will she tell my parents if I want to keep it confidential...
Hey there, It depends on where you are in the world. In the UK, it might be possible for a 12-year-old to go to visit their GP themselves, though the doctor may or may not want to talk to the parent/legal guardian as well. For more information, you can check out ChildLine’s article here: www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/getting-help/visiting-your-doctor/ I also realised that you commented on our self-harm video. ChildLine also has a good section on self-harm www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/your-feelings/self-harm/ that you might like to check out. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I got sent to the hospital into the psychiatric until lol. This is my second time I’ve gone to the hospital, group therapy and normal therapy both times. Do I feel better? Absolutely not. I cut myself to this day. amazing.
Hi Kayla, Sorry to hear that you have been in a psychiatric unit and received therapy and didn’t find it helpful. I hope that it doesn’t put you off continuing to reach out for help though- it might take a while to find the right therapist, or the right therapy or combination of support- but it’s worth it. Since you mentioned that you still self-harm, you might want to read our articles for suggestions on coping tips www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html and dealing with urges www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html If you are in the UK, and under 25, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ where you can chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. If you aren’t in the UK, there’s always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a support forum dedicated to managing and recovering from self-harm. Take care and stay strong, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
How can I get help? My parents have found out about my self harm a total of 3 times (I told them once) and they are to embarrassed to find me a professional help. All they do is talk about it to me once (not even supportive, just disappointed) and take away my tools. I've been self harming for almost a year now, and it gets progressively worse and worse. I often have suicidal thoughts now. I know I can't do it on my own and I don't have any friends that I am comfortable talking about it with (I have tried, none of them understand) and If I go to my school I will get suspended for a week (either way school is out) so my parents are no help, my friends don't help, and my school isn't. How can I get professional help?
Hi there, Having a physical check-up can be daunting when you have self-harmed, whether it’s in the past or something you are currently going through. You might want to check out our article on self-harm and confidentiality www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/confidentiality-and-self-harm-5685.html (UK perspective) for future reference, if you are concerned about health professionals talking to you about your self-harm. If you’d like more support, and you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to vent, chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. All the best, Maisy@TheMix
i wish it was like this where i live in Cananda, in my smal town of pembroke people jude and they dont havepeople liek you there. you seem very nice and i wish there was a way to get help but not here because well we dont have the right people. any advice?
Hey Hannah, Sorry this is a late reply! I’m also sorry to hear that your doctor was unhelpful regarding self-harm. It can be tough dealing with mental health and self-harm but it doesn’t mean that you can’t recover or that you’ll never get a job. You might want to check out our articles on self-harm coping tips and distractions www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html as well as how to cope with urges to self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html If you are in the UK and under 25, you can also join our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a dedicated support forum for those dealing with self-harm. All the best, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I've told a few family members about my self harming, but u only told them that I've done it once. I've done it 6 times and only a few of my friends know the truth. I don't self harm any more, but I don't know if I should tell my family the truth or just leave it?
Hahaha my gp was like what’s wrong with you so I told him about my depression self harm and suicidal thoughts (this is the first time I’ve seen the doctor by myself even tho my mum was outside) and he turned to me and said what do you want me to do about it? So I asked if he can refer me to camhs (by this point I’m crying cause if what I’ve just told a stranger and how they reacted) and he asked me what camhs was...... like ishdhshkssh then he had to call the nurse in so ask about it so yeah that was fun still not in camhs two months later
Hi Chloe, Very sorry to hear your experience at the doctors. Unfortunately, not everyone has a positive experience of going to the doctors and it’s possible that some doctors aren’t very mental health aware. However, it was very brave of you to talk to the doctor by yourself (though there’s nothing wrong with having your mum in the room with you if you feel you need someone to back you up) and open up about your struggles with depression, self-harm and suicidal thoughts. Well done for opening up and I hope that this experience doesn’t put you off from going to the doctors in the future- you deserve the best treatment and support! Unfortunately, there can be a bit of a waiting list for CAMHS. Is it possible to chase this up? In the meantime, if you are under 25 and in the UK, you can get free, one-to-one support from The Mix by contacting our team here: www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team If you’d like to chat and get support from other young people, feel free to check out our discussion boards too: community.themix.org.uk/ If you are under 19 and in the UK, there is also Childline: www.childline.org.uk/ Alternatively, there is always the Samaritans www.samaritans.org/ Take care and hope you get the help you need soon, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
This is a good video. There is a lot of work to do this field. Besides the worry of social stigma and what family might think, I have seen plenty of stories on the internet of girls being traumatically strip searched, held down by men and clothes torn off, put in restraints for a cruel amount of time, up to 24 hrs. Enough to make any one scared to death to seek treatment at a hospital. Progress still has to be made.
@flyingmonkeyelephant Thanks loads for your wonderful & inspiring advice - it's great to hear you've spoken to your doctor and have received positive support from them. It's really helpful to hear this, so thanks again for sharing your thoughts. All the best, Chris @ TheSite.org
And lol forgot to say watching this film that Dr is really nice I wouldn't mind going to her and talking about my problems its just ashame that not every Dr is like that.
I just want to hide it. I don’t need help I’ve been clean for a long time. I just want to hide it and pretend nothing ever happened and be happy. No more worries or anxiety or being petrified when some nurse asks you to roll up your sleeves.
Hey there, It’s understandable that you’d like to hide your scars and would find questions about your scars to be intrusive and unnecessary now that you’ve stopped self-harming. If you are interested, you may want to check out our articles on honouring your scars www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/how-i-decided-to-honour-my-self-harm-scars-40041.html to help with trying to accept them rather than feel ashamed. You can also check out our article on skin camouflage www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/how-can-skin-camouflage-help-with-my-self-harm-scars-40069.html to help cover your scars. If you are looking for further support and you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ where you can chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. All the best, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Exactly whe my friends found out they just said don't do it, just be normal. If we had that option wouldn't we take it? I don't do it for attention else why did I hide it for two years (not long but is still going)? I choose to self harm as it my best option from what I can see/express. It's SH or suicide for me (and I want to live).
well, i got caught with my parents but i go to a psychiatry center once a week now . i've gone there once so far & she cant tell my parents anything cause im 14. but anything under 14 they tell .
I'm not from the UK, but I think it means general practitioner. Like a family doctor the one you see for yearly checkups for school and so on....not 100% positive though.
Hi there, This video was a collaboration between The Mix and Dr. Gemma Newman. The title of this video is “Self-harm: What happens when you see a doctor? ft. Dr. Gemma Newman | The Mix” We also have an accompanying article for this video that you can check out here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/going-to-your-gp-about-self-harm-5688.html All the best, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Hey there, Sorry to hear you are hurting yourself and not being very aware of it. Wanting to recover from self-harm can feel difficult but it’s always worth it. You might like to check out our article on starting your recovery from self-harm, here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html During your recovery, you may still feel urges to self-harm and sometimes it can be tempting to give in to the urge. However, you might want to check out our article on dealing with urges to help with that www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html Equally, and perhaps more so if you self-harm and aren’t very aware of it, it’s good to find alternatives to self-harm, such as the suggestions listed in our article here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you find that you have realised you are self-harming while or just after it, try not to be hard on yourself and take the time to check in with yourself and see if you can use a coping technique instead. When we aren’t very aware of ourselves or our actions, we may not be living mindfully. Mindfulness helps us to pay attention to ourselves, our bodies and the world around us more. For more information on mindfulness, feel free to check out our article here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/mental-health-treatments/mindfulness-5964.html Lastly, if you’d like more support and are between the ages of 13-25 and in the UK, feel free to join our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to supporting recovery from self-harm. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Please help.. I need help but I don’t know how to ask my parents for it.. I need a therapist or something.. I know this is different but idk where to ask.. please..
Hi there, Sorry to hear that you need help but don’t know how to ask your parents for it. It can be scary opening up about how you have been feeling, but can be very worth it when you can get the support you need. If you are struggling with self-harm and want to talk to your parents about it, you might find our article on telling someone you self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/telling-someone-you-self-harm-5682.html helpful. You can also adjust it to talk about mental health or anything that’s on your mind. If you are in the UK and under 25, you can also sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/index.php?categoryid=1 a forum dedicated to recovering from self-harm and Befrienders Worldwide www.befrienders.org/ are always there to listen (you don’t have to be suicidal to talk to them). Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
When I selfed harm my self it was in 5th grade it was because I was mad and sad cause my dad said I’m the worst child ever and saying mean stuff to me cause I did something wrong I’ve regretted doing it I only did it once and I’m never doing it again it was dumb of me my mom and dad don’t know cause I don’t know how to tell them some of my friends asked what happened cause I don’t want to hide my scares but I don’t say anything to them and I’m planning to come out soon does anyone know what I should say....
Hi, this must have been really difficult for you. We don't provide support through our RUclips comments section, but if you wish to access our support services, you can find them here: www.themix.org.uk/get-support
I got scared to half death at the doctor's today it was so close like they needed me to take my shirt of and I just self harmed like right before the appointment and I was like fuck so I started saying no no no no pls don't then they let me keep it on thank god
Hey there, It sounds like it was a stressful time for you at the doctors and trying to hide your self-harm. If you are looking for support for self-harm, you might want to check out our article on steps to self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html as well as how to cope with a self-harm relapse www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/how-to-cope-with-a-self-harm-relapse-5684.html If you would like more support, and you live in the UK and are between the ages of 13-25, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also speak to our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/ a forum dedicated to supporting people recover from self-harm. Take care, Maisy@TheMix
I'm going to see the doctor tomorrow and that's what I'm nervous about...I'm scared that they'll tell my parents about it or mention it in front of them
See its stuff like that it makes me feel like the Dr in the video is just trying to get rid of you If i came to you and you told me to go to someone diff I picked you for a reason we just can't tell anyone what's going on afiad of being locked up in the nut house I picked you because it felt safe now you want to send me away is how I would feel is sad and alone
All these people in the comments are talking about their gp’s being non understanding. My mum is taking me to a gp soon... I’m scared my gp will be like the people’s in the comments...
Hey there, It’s understandable that reading through the comments where many people have felt misunderstood when talking to health professionals about their self-harm can leave you feeling anxious about your own appointment with your GP. However, just because some people have had negative experiences, it doesn’t mean that you will have negative experiences either. While some professionals may not understand self-harm, there will be many who do. You might want to read through our accompanying article on going to the GP about self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/going-to-your-gp-about-self-harm-5688.html It makes an important point at the end that if you don’t feel comfortable with a health professional and feel that they don’t understand you, then you can find another GP instead. If you’d like more support and you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ or contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Hope the GP appointment goes smoothly! Take care Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Hi there, It’s understandable that you are scared to open up to your dad about your self-harm but it’s good that you do want to talk to him about it. If you’d like, you might want to read our article on how to talk to someone about self-harm here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harming-heres-how-to-talk-to-someone-about-it-35999.html You might also want to check out our articles on steps to self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html as well as self-harm coping tips and distractions www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you’d like more support, and you are in the UK and between the ages of 13-25, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact us directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Sounds like the usual UK GP.There are good GP's out there,my first one after moving was useless and uninterested.I learned of a GP in the same surgery who was highly spoken of.I went to see him and he's great,so needless to say I changed GP's.He's the only good one in the place out of six GP's.
Hi there, Sorry to hear your experience of going to the doctor and ending up being admitted. That must’ve been difficult for you. As the video explained, doctors are there to help you so try not to let the last experience stop you from getting the help you need and deserve. If you are under 25 and in the UK, and you’d like support, feel free to reach out to our team: www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team or join our discussion boards: community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. Take care, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Hi there, That GP doesn’t sound very professional and I’m sorry you had that experience! I hope you have a better GP now. You might want to check out our article on seeing a GP for self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/going-to-your-gp-about-self-harm-5688.html for insight into how professionals might treat self-harm. If you are looking for further support, and you are between the ages of 13-25, and live in the UK, you might want to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place you can vent and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Stay strong, Maisy@TheMix
Hi there, It can be difficult to work out who you can and can’t trust when opening up about self-harm. Unfortunately, sometimes some people don’t understand and may say hurtful things as a result. But don’t let that stop you from reaching out for the help and support you need. You might want to check out our article on talking about self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harming-heres-how-to-talk-to-someone-about-it-35999.html As it mentions, even if you don’t have anyone in your life that you feel you can trust, you could reach out to mental health professionals or charities. If you are looking for more support, and you are in the UK and between the ages of 13-25, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ where you can vent, chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to recovering from self-harm. Stay strong, Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Whether you’re 13, 25, or any age in between, we’re here to take on anything and everything: sex, sexuality, housing, mental health, self-harm, body positivity - if you've got a question, we'll look to explore it and help.
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The Mix if someone is 15 and sees a GP on their own, is there a need to contact a parent?
what if ur 11 🥺😖😭😭
What if your under 13? I’m 10
My GP isn't understanding and has even made me cry before on more than one occasion. I've been self harming for 17 years and no one has ever offered to help me or wanted me to talk about it. I don't ask for help anymore, it's just not worth it. Nobody wants to take the time to listen or even try to understand.
I would take as much time as you need. I'm not a psychologist but I promise you.. I will listen! I've gone through a lot of things, so I know what you are talking about. Drop me an e-mail whenever you like. (my.adrian.fogarty@gmail.com) If not, stay strong!
If you still need to talk, email me at: littlemisskate2000@gmail.com.com
I feel the same I'm sorry that ure going through this
I can understand that. I have a fear of doctors so of course that helps.
That means she or he is not a good professional. Look for someone else
Wow only if the US was like this
Honestly the UK isn't
BlackandWhiteRosez yup the UK isnt
BlackandWhiteRosez Most of what they say is bs but it depends on your GP
If only the uk was
well the U.S or were i live think people who cut need to go to therapy but all the therapists and mine make it all about them but thats just were i live
The first time I self harmed and told my therapist about it, she immediately started trying to put me in inpatient treatment. I repeatedly told her that I was not suicidal nor did I want to harm anyone else. Instead of trying to work with me to stop gradually, she made me sign a contract to never do it again at all and if I did, she had permission to have me committed. Of course all this did was make me afraid to be honest with her. I believe she completely over reacted since it was my first time and had no history of it or being suicidal in the past
Wow... She overreacted a lot I would honestly see a new therapist that you can be open and honest with. Mine only told my mom. Stay strong your worth a lot
I had a crises and was cutting everyday. I was covered in bandages and my therapist didn't threaten to have me put into a hospital or anything.
Thats an overraction id say to leave her honetly if she does that its stupid unless lit was like fat/ mucle which u would need to go to the hospital for (stitches) she had no right to do that forcing you to sign that contrat was a real asshole move on her part
Hospital is not much fun , I escaped but The police caught up with me. Finally got out and received a piece of paper saying I was sane I framed it
When i used to self harm (i don't anymore) i told my friend as she had gone through the same thing and i thought she would understand. But she didn't believe me, got me to show her my cuts and then said i was attention seeking, a faker and that i wasnt even "cutting properly" like wtf? That was last year, and those words still hurt :(
fairlylocaldreamer that's awful, I'm really sorry
errr... what? What she said didn't make like any sense.
same here, she was also the same person to repeatedly tell me to kms and slit my wrists to death.
@@ashleygross2691 Hi, maybe try your best to leave her out of your life she seems to be adding to your worries even more
@@hellothere4485 I know and I try to but she keeps rolling back
If I see a gp about me self harming I want to see her she seems to understand and have a nice personality
How are you now?
I wish my GP was as understaing as her
Why don't we have anything like this in the US?!.....
you have doctors in the us dont you ? Erin Rankin
Yes, but not anything as advanced as this, that I know of. Here, it's more 'looked down' upon by doctors and society and very few ppl that struggle with SH (that I know of) have found help by going to a doctor.
i dont know why the us dont have things like that cuz i live in the uk so i dont know much about the us
We have therapists (counseling) but no gp
i dont think we have that here in the uk
The first GP i saw laughed when i said i was self harming. Can u actually believe that? I went to see a different one who basically said i was a normal teenager and it was my hormones. 2 years and a suicide attempt later.... i wonder if he still thinks that its hormones!
my gp said the exact thing to me as well
Anyone else realise that the girl who she was “talking to” was the girl from don’t call me crazy on Netflix 😂
Myha Rose Beth
My GP I see about mental illness issues and SI is really lovely, non judgemental gone to get wounds looked at and stuff and she was great about it all, she is a great help. There are doctors out there that do generally care and show it, just a matter of finding them. I am Australian btw.
Hi Kirsty,
Thanks for your comments. Talking to a health professional can really help you to express your feelings and we're really pleased to hear you had the confidence to go and see your GP after seeing this.
All the best.
Hi. If you’re under 16, things are a little bit more uncertain and different doctors surgeries can have different policies. The best thing to do is to ask the receptionist or your doctor to explain their confidentiality policy to you before you tell them anything. If you have any more questions get in touch with askTheSite, our confidential question and answer service or visit the site.org and take a look at our self-harm section
Take Care
Rob@TheSite
I don’t self harm anymore, but when I used to back in January 2012, I didn’t have any friends whatsoever to turn to. I don’t have any now either but I talked to my Business Studies teacher at college and my close friend and he helped me through it. You just need to talk to someone who you trust I’d say.
my mom is well aware that i self-harm. yet she only shrugs it off like it doesn't matter at all and calls me crazy
@sarah1oszter
Thanks Sarah for your comment. Glad you liked it.
My psychiatrist just gives me med and asks me a few questions then I leave. My friends self harm and when I tell my counselor she tells me I need to mind my own business and if she wants to get help she’ll get help. But when my friend goes and told her when I do it she’ll call my mom and will send me the hospital
Hi there,
Sorry to hear that you struggle with self-harm. It’s good that you see a psychiatrist and a counsellor (and I hope you find it helpful). I also understand it must be difficult for you when you tell your counsellor that your friends self-harm but are told she must get help for herself, and yet when a friend tells your counsellor that you are self-harming, you get a phone call to your mom. It may be that your counsellor is trying to look out for you and is doing what they feel is best for you.
If you’d like, feel free to check out our article on self-harm coping tips www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html which can be useful when you feel the urge to self-harm.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
@hey12690
GP stands for General Practitioner and is a common term for a doctor in the UK.
I started sh in May 2022 and I told my doctor about it a week ago, I first told my sister about my sh and then told my doctor last week. It was very hard for me because I felt all the guilt. I started to break down while explaining it and my doctor gave me a sticky note with the crisis hotline and some other services such as other websites.
Hi there,
It takes a lot of courage to open up about self-harm, but we are glad you did! It’s also good to know that your doctor gave you information about hotlines and services too.
If you are looking for ways to deal with self-harm, you might want to check out our article on steps to self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html
If you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, you can also sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
Take care,
Maisy@TheMix
It stands for General Practitioner...or your own personal Dr that you have been registered too.
I'm 15 I went to my doctor about my SH and a whole list of other mental shit and I've been referred to a psychiatrist and a psychologist. It was my first time going into the doctors office on my own and she was great
I told her my mum doesn't know I SH and she has kept it between us
To any other younger people who are afraid to go, it's really not as scary as it seems, and try going to a younger doctor, sometimes they understand a bit more than older practitioners do, in my experience.
@superman2ify
Yes, in the UK a 14 year old can go and visit a GP and talk to them in confidence about self-harm. Here's a useful snippet from the NHS Code of Practice on Confidentiality (2003) ... “Children under the age of 16 who have the capacity and understanding to take decisions about their own treatment are also entitled to make decisions about the use and disclosure of information they have provided in confidence.”
You should feel confident about talking to your GP about your feelings.
@superman2ify
If you still have questions, we run askTheSite a confidential Q&A service where you can message your questions to one of our advisors. You can also ask a question in our moderated discussion forum which is a really useful place to get good advice. Just Google, 'askthesite' or 'thesite: discussion forum'.
Take care.
Chris @ TheSite.org
i wanna go talk to my doctor cause i think about ending my life 24/7 but that cofidental is bullshit ik withg what i would tell my dr he would call the cops an lock me up in a mental hospital that aint happening so i prolly wont ever get help my only way out is death an even if i were to seek help it wouldnt work u need a great attitude for help to work and i have a horrible 1
In many time of my life ive harmed myself but have pulled through it, but still sometimes have thoughts.
there are two ways You can either do it or let the pain pass
Hi there,
Thank you for commenting and sharing your experiences with us!
I’m sorry to hear that you have previously harmed yourself, and though you’ve managed to get through it, that you still sometimes get thoughts to self-harm. You are right though that you can try to let the pain pass (as it usually does). But sometimes it can be difficult to deal with the thoughts and try to resist harming yourself. You might want to check out our article on dealing with urges to self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html for more ideas on how to deal with those urges without self-harming.
If you are in the UK, and under 25, and would like a safe place to chat and get support from other young people, feel free to join our discussion boards: community.themix.org.uk/ You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ is a forum dedicated to supporting those who are managing and recovering from self-harm.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
@@TheMixUK thx but I've been through a lot in my life so, its been hard but im strong
@@TheMixUK thank u for understanding
Come on guysss they dont actually care, they got paid for listening....
why would you become a doctor hwo help people to get out of self harm if you didnt care? those arent the doctors who make the most money you know..
Your terrible
I’m scared that my mom will yell at me, she SCREAMED. At me when I told her that I wanted to die. If I tell my counselor then she’s forced to tell her and I don’t want her to. I feel like it’s dumb that the first thing they have to do is tell your parents because I feel like sooo many lives could be saved if that wasn’t the case, there are many people in my situation and some people lose their battle all because they didn’t feel comfortable talking to someone.
Hey there,
I’m sorry to hear how your mom reacted when you told her you wanted to die. It makes sense that you would be concerned about how she would handle news of self-harming. It can also make things seem unfair when your counsellor has to tell your parents, when you feel this only worsens the situation. However, counsellors have a duty of care to protect you and they may feel that it is necessary to break confidentiality to help keep you safe.
Many parents react differently to finding out their child is struggling with self-harm or suicidal thoughts. They may be concerned and scared, and unfortunately, this may look like they are angry with us. If you plan on confiding in your mom or your counsellor and are worried about your mom’s reaction, you might want show her our top tips on what to do when someone tells you they self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/5-tips-if-someone-tells-you-theyre-self-harming-28639.html
If you would like more support, feel free to sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ If you want to talk to someone, there’s always the Crisis Text Line: www.crisistextline.org/
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Could someone please help me? I am suffering with self-harm and depression, and I don't know who to tell. In the video, they said you should tell someone you trust, but what happens if you don't trust anyone? I know I could go to my GP, but my social anxiety kicks in, leading me to not go. I'm only 12, soon 13, and it's not like I can just go to the doctors about it. Please help me...
I know how hard it can be, but honestly, once you tell someone who cares for you it is a relief. I understand how you feel with the whole doctors and social anxiety thing. I hope you find someone to confide in, I know its never easy! I told my mom, but I'm not sure its as easy for you. Do you have any close friends you may be able to talk to or a guidance counsellor at school? I hope things get better, I'll be thinking about you!
RiviRose Thankyou, I really do hope there are more people in the world like you. And no, I don't have any friends at this present moment in time, I don't have anyone. I do have a school counsellor, but I am too affraid to step up and say 'I need help', thing are getting out of control, I'm just bottling it up. I hope you feel better, too. Thankyou for your kind words xoxo
HeyImMadi I'm jenna , and just read your comment . Okay so , I'm 14 and I've been self harming for 2 to 3 years now , but actually stopped 2 months and 4 days ago . My problem is , is that I didn't go to anyone for help . My advice to you is to go to your parents immediately because they are the ones that care so so so much about you . It's going to be so scary to confront them about it but trust me , everything gets better . You can do this , just ask to talk to them for a few minutes and let it out . Okay ? It will be tough but you can do it , don't let this self harm get in the way anymore . Make it stop . Stay strong , you're beautiful .
Jenna Garcia Thankyou, its nice to know that people are going through the same things
Yes, it really is. But you have the courage to do this, you can do it. Don't worry, they won't think any differently of you.
It stands for "general practitioner". I don't think they refer to them as GP's in the US if that's where you're from?
I self harm and today I had to cover the cuts up cause I went to get a wellness check
Hey there,
I’m sorry to hear that you self-harm. It’s understandable that you would feel you had to hide your cuts when having a wellness check. But remember that health professionals are there to help and they shouldn’t be judgemental. Don’t let these worries get in the way of reaching out for support!
If you’d like, feel free to check out our article on alternatives to self-harm: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html
If you are under 25 and in the UK, you can also join our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. Alternatively, RecoverYourLife is also available: www.recoveryourlife.com/
All the best,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Whether it's gp or psychiatrist they are the same. They dont care. They are not care.. And they just talk super long to drag the time so that they can get more money ok! Mayb one or two r gd but most of them just dont care.
blueeeskies w wut?? you dont pay to see the gp apart from tax
When I told my GP they have done nothing my school is the one to get me the help and be referd to camhs
I'm lucky I go to a youth clinic for mental health and my doctor understands the difficulties... Though she saw my scars the first time 2 weeks ago... which had her reacted and then she ended up patching my wounds a couple days ago... I think you just need to find the right doctor.. She admitted when she started out as a GP she use to get angry and didn't understand it... But says now she treats it like anything else... I'm truly thankful for the relationship my doctor and I have.
this vid gave me the conifdance to see my gp, he was nice he refurd me to a pshothapist , i just want to say thank you to this video i now know i have high depression, he did ask me to see the cuts but i just plyed this video in my head .. thankyouu
I started crying my eyes out when she said tell someone who would react positively... because no one I told has.. my cousin didnt care my bestfriend told me to just stop like it was the easiest thing in the world my parents told me I was ruining the temple of God and that it was because of all the things i like and made me promise never to do it again even tho I still do... and my other friend kept trying to force me to show him my cuts. Everyone I have ever tried to tell either didnt care or forced me to do something that made me feel worse. And I'm too scared to talk to a stranger about it because I'm socially awkward with strangers. So yeah I'm fucked. YUPEEEE
Hi there,
It was really brave of you to open up to others about your self-harm. Unfortunately, sometimes people may not know how to react when you tell them about your self-harm. For example, when your best friend told you to stop, it may be that they do care about you and would like you to stop self-harming but may not realise how difficult it can be to stop self-harming. The same goes for your parents who tell that you are ‘ruining the temple of God’ and blame it on the things you like. They too may care (they feel you are harming your body) but may not know how what they say comes across to you as not caring.
It seems like self-harm is something you struggle with. If that’s the case, you might want to check out our articles on self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html and coping tips and distractions www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you decide you would like to talk to someone in your life about your self-harm, you may want to check out (and send to those you tell) this article on supporting someone who self-harms www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/supporting-someone-who-self-harms-5690.html
I understand you don’t feel comfortable telling strangers about your self-harm, but if you are between the ages of 13-25 and in the UK, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to vent and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support with our understanding and non-judgemental team. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ forums dedicated to recovering from self-harm.
Take care and stay strong,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
The only thing My gp said was you're only feeling bad about ur self snap out of it
Wow that was rude
I am 16 and I regurly self harm. My best friend offered to go to the gp with me BUT my nan and aunt both work for the NHS and have access to the database. So would it be put on a file visible to other NHS employees?
I've seen three doctors, four different counsellors and been on antidepressants and nothing has worked. It seems like there's no way to fix it, I asked for a diagnosis so I knew what I was dealing with and got nothing. I don't like going to the doctors as it is and all the times they've failed me has meant I totally refuse to go now even though I'm getting worse. They couldn't even fix non-mental health problems.
My GP doesn't even make eye contact with me when I visit about self-harm, depression, suicidal thoughts, dropping out of university due to anxiety... Just prescribes generic anti-depressants and sends me on my way. Can't say he's done me much good, to be honest.
is it possible for a 14 year old to see a gp?
@awesome1est93
Hi there, thanks for your comment. If you would like to discuss these issues in confidence, we run both a forum (Google: 'thesite boards') and AskTheSite (Google: 'askthesite'), where you can ask other young people and experts about self-harm and the feelings you're experiencing. It's a really good community of users and you'll be made to feel very welcome.
Take care,
Chris @ TheSite.org
@alfredobolanos96 Hi Alfred, it stands for General Practitioner and is the UK term for a family doctor.
Yeah but what if you don't want your mum to find out that your still cutting
That's always been my problem
Yeah, because I mean yeah it good to talk and all but it's really hard and then for your mum to find out it's even worse personally my mum gets really angry.
@@hermioniegrangerfan6898 my mother never understood and just told me to stop but I am still doing it 2 year's later
Catherine Clifton my mam thinks that because she knows i will stop... I mean no!
Hey there,
It’s always scary opening up about your struggles, more so if you are unsure of how the other person may react and especially if you are concerned you will get a negative reaction.
You might want to check out our article on telling someone you self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/telling-someone-you-self-harm-5682.html for ideas on who to talk to and how to deal with their reactions.
If you are still dealing with self-harm, feel free to check out our self-harm coping tips article www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html as well as our dealing with urges to self-harm article www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html
If you are under 25 and in the UK, you can also sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to recovering from self-harm.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Is stabbing your gums with your nail until you bleed self harm?
Zainab Heavan yes. Self harm is not always bleeding for example I self harm but don’t bleed just enough to cause pain and discomfort. I don’t have scars but self harming is just when you hurt yourself in any way. Hope this helps but if you haven’t already tell someone and get some help before it progresses to worse. X
self harm is my friend.
@cdsmith1990 Thanks for your comments. Have you considered changing doctor? You are entitled to request another doctor from the PCT if you aren't satisfied with the service from the one you have. We have an article about this... Google, "TheSite.org GPs: the alternatives". Hope this helps.
Take care,
Chris @ TheSite.org
I need someone like that
i used to self harm pretty much every day. its less often now, but i still feel the need to do it, i just know the consiquences.
i went to see my gp a few weeks ago (not because of self harming- it was another matter) but i had counselling for my self harming (i didn't like the woman so i quit after a few weeks) so it was on my record. when she saw it she wanted to talk about it, but when you're talking to someone like that they're constantly anylising you. it makes you feel patronised & judged
I’m under 15 will my doctor tell my parents if they see my healed scars on my shoulder (they’re healed) I’m in the us btw
Hey there,
You might want to check out our article on self-harm and confidentiality www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/confidentiality-and-self-harm-5685.html
While we are aimed at young people living in the UK, it may be similar to other places. Generally, any age under the age of legal adulthood (in some places that is 18) may require a professional to break confidentiality, but this is often due to other factors such as being at serious risk for suicide or there is a risk of abuse at home.
However, even if a professional feels they need to break confidentiality about your self-harm, try not to let this put you off from visiting a health professional. They are there to help you and would only break confidentiality to allow you to get the help and support you need.
Take care,
Maisy@TheMix
The thing is with seeing someone is that it's a gamble you have to be lucky to get the right person or it can make it worse and that's why I'm so afraid to ask for help because I have no guarantee of seeing someone who won't judge me
Hi there,
It’s understandable that you’d feel that way about accessing mental health services when there may be a stigma. Unfortunately, there are some cases where people have asked for help regarding mental health only to have felt invalidated later on. However, that doesn’t mean to say that you are guaranteed to have such a response. Thankfully, there is an increased awareness of mental health, particularly in young people, and so we can hope that professionals will be more informed and understanding of their patients. Try not to let the risk of talking to a professional who doesn’t understand stop you from reaching out. Worst case scenario, you can always try getting a second opinion- hopefully from someone with more understanding!
If you’d like more support, and you are between the ages of 13-25, and live in the UK, feel free to reach out to us at our online community community.themix.org.uk/ You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Brains and beauty, Bravo !!!
dude its sad. self harm hurts destroys you
im a current self harmer
been doing it since 8
I started sh like 5 years ago and just told a trustworthy person. However I am still scared because I feel like I'm just being an attention seeker but I want to get help so I can feel good again
Hi there,
Well done on talking to someone about your self-harm. That can be a really difficult step to take but it’s also an important one too. It’s understandable that you might be concerned about being an attention seeker but often times there are reasons as to why you started self-harming and the fact that you do want to stop and feel better suggests that you are not just seeking attention.
You’ve already completed one of the first steps on the journey to recovering from self-harm. For more information on recovering from self-harm, you might want to check out our article here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html
If you’d like more support, and you live in the UK and are between the ages of 13-25, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is also RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/ a website dedicated to supporting those who self-harm in their recovery.
Take care,
Maisy@TheMix
I cut and scratches 4 years ... I'm refuse because I choose to die or alive
Michelle Vincent English...?
Michelle, everybody deserves to live. Yoh just need to stay strong and keep fighting. As a former self harmer, I know it’s hsrd but keep fighting. I’m sorry. That’s the only advice hat I can give you that helped me. Stay strong and keep fighting.
When I went to the doctor they just asked to see them I wanted to refuse but I wanted to get it over with cause I have bad nervousness
And then they just told me a site to go on and sign up to speak to a Councellor in person and on call...
They just ask the same questions
And that's it
No explaining feelings
Just answering questions and it actually makes it worse.
Stay strong xx
Hey there,
It can definitely be very nerve wracking when you are asked to show your self-harm scars to anyone, particularly when it comes to doctors and other professionals. Sometimes doctors may not know how to help when it comes to mental health or self-harm and while suggesting a site to go on may have been useful, you may also want to see if you can be referred to mental health care for more specific support.
Talking to a counsellor can help, although people may have different experiences as it can depend on a lot of factors such as whether you trust your counsellor and feel motivated to give counselling a chance and also the type of counselling provided. If you feel it’s not been helpful for you, then you might want to consider letting the counsellor know so that other options can be explored.
If you are looking for support with self-harm, you might want to check out our article on steps to recovering from self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html as well as our self-harm coping tips and distractions article www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html
If you are in the UK, and between the ages of 13-25, you are also more than welcome to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to vent and get support from other young people or contact our team www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there’s always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to managing and recovering from self-harm.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
my parents told my GP when i was about 12 that i was shy and didn't mix with other kids i think he said something like i'd grow out of it i didn't !!!
Hey there,
I’m sorry to hear that your GP said you would grow out of your shyness, and yet, you haven’t. Unfortunately, GPs don’t always know best when it comes to development or mental health. Shyness can be ‘normal’ for some such as those who are introverted, while for others, shyness may actually be anxiety which can cause problems in someone’s life. Whether or not ‘shyness’ is a problem depends on how you feel about it. The same goes for not mixing with other children. For some this may just be part of who they are, and for others, it may be for other reasons such as autism. Again, the only thing that separates it from being considered a ‘problem’ is how you feel about it.
If you’d like more information on shyness, feel free to check out our article here: www.themix.org.uk/sex-and-relationships/friendship/shyness-3326.html We also have an article on social anxiety too: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/anxiety-ocd-and-phobias/coping-with-social-anxiety-29093.html
For more support, if you are in the UK and under 25, feel free to sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
If you are under 18, is it possible to get therapy without having your parents know?probably not right...I want to tell my guidance consuleor will she tell my parents if I want to keep it confidential...
Can a 12 year old go to a GP...
Hey there,
It depends on where you are in the world. In the UK, it might be possible for a 12-year-old to go to visit their GP themselves, though the doctor may or may not want to talk to the parent/legal guardian as well. For more information, you can check out ChildLine’s article here: www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/getting-help/visiting-your-doctor/
I also realised that you commented on our self-harm video. ChildLine also has a good section on self-harm www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/your-feelings/self-harm/ that you might like to check out.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
if only the US was like this
I got sent to the hospital into the psychiatric until lol. This is my second time I’ve gone to the hospital, group therapy and normal therapy both times. Do I feel better? Absolutely not. I cut myself to this day. amazing.
Hi Kayla,
Sorry to hear that you have been in a psychiatric unit and received therapy and didn’t find it helpful. I hope that it doesn’t put you off continuing to reach out for help though- it might take a while to find the right therapist, or the right therapy or combination of support- but it’s worth it.
Since you mentioned that you still self-harm, you might want to read our articles for suggestions on coping tips www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html and dealing with urges www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html
If you are in the UK, and under 25, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ where you can chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. If you aren’t in the UK, there’s always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a support forum dedicated to managing and recovering from self-harm.
Take care and stay strong,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
The Mix Thank You! :)
Drs have seen all this b4, go and chat with them.
I would never go to my GP and tell him about what I was doing...although having said that I feel like I want to but can't find the courage.
if you are under 18 can you make an appointment without your parents?
I'm 8 yrs late but do u know the answer
How can I get help? My parents have found out about my self harm a total of 3 times (I told them once) and they are to embarrassed to find me a professional help. All they do is talk about it to me once (not even supportive, just disappointed) and take away my tools. I've been self harming for almost a year now, and it gets progressively worse and worse. I often have suicidal thoughts now. I know I can't do it on my own and I don't have any friends that I am comfortable talking about it with (I have tried, none of them understand) and If I go to my school I will get suspended for a week (either way school is out) so my parents are no help, my friends don't help, and my school isn't. How can I get professional help?
HollieHamstrung Have you tried phoning a help line?
i have a physical tomorw rn its 4 am im scared to go bc they need to take my blood pressure from my arm
Hi there,
Having a physical check-up can be daunting when you have self-harmed, whether it’s in the past or something you are currently going through. You might want to check out our article on self-harm and confidentiality www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/confidentiality-and-self-harm-5685.html (UK perspective) for future reference, if you are concerned about health professionals talking to you about your self-harm.
If you’d like more support, and you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to vent, chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
All the best,
Maisy@TheMix
i wish it was like this where i live in Cananda, in my smal town of pembroke people jude and they dont havepeople liek you there. you seem very nice and i wish there was a way to get help but not here because well we dont have the right people. any advice?
My Dr never helped he said I wouldn't get a job if I kept doing it
Hey Hannah,
Sorry this is a late reply! I’m also sorry to hear that your doctor was unhelpful regarding self-harm. It can be tough dealing with mental health and self-harm but it doesn’t mean that you can’t recover or that you’ll never get a job.
You might want to check out our articles on self-harm coping tips and distractions www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html as well as how to cope with urges to self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html
If you are in the UK and under 25, you can also join our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a dedicated support forum for those dealing with self-harm.
All the best,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Best ever i suffer from self harm but i wouldn't go to a gp its too scary
I've told a few family members about my self harming, but u only told them that I've done it once. I've done it 6 times and only a few of my friends know the truth. I don't self harm any more, but I don't know if I should tell my family the truth or just leave it?
Hahaha my gp was like what’s wrong with you so I told him about my depression self harm and suicidal thoughts (this is the first time I’ve seen the doctor by myself even tho my mum was outside) and he turned to me and said what do you want me to do about it? So I asked if he can refer me to camhs (by this point I’m crying cause if what I’ve just told a stranger and how they reacted) and he asked me what camhs was...... like ishdhshkssh then he had to call the nurse in so ask about it so yeah that was fun still not in camhs two months later
Hi Chloe,
Very sorry to hear your experience at the doctors. Unfortunately, not everyone has a positive experience of going to the doctors and it’s possible that some doctors aren’t very mental health aware. However, it was very brave of you to talk to the doctor by yourself (though there’s nothing wrong with having your mum in the room with you if you feel you need someone to back you up) and open up about your struggles with depression, self-harm and suicidal thoughts. Well done for opening up and I hope that this experience doesn’t put you off from going to the doctors in the future- you deserve the best treatment and support!
Unfortunately, there can be a bit of a waiting list for CAMHS. Is it possible to chase this up? In the meantime, if you are under 25 and in the UK, you can get free, one-to-one support from The Mix by contacting our team here: www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team If you’d like to chat and get support from other young people, feel free to check out our discussion boards too: community.themix.org.uk/ If you are under 19 and in the UK, there is also Childline: www.childline.org.uk/ Alternatively, there is always the Samaritans www.samaritans.org/
Take care and hope you get the help you need soon,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
This is a good video. There is a lot of work to do this field. Besides the worry of social stigma and what family might think, I have seen plenty of stories on the internet of girls being traumatically strip searched, held down by men and clothes torn off, put in restraints for a cruel amount of time, up to 24 hrs. Enough to make any one scared to death to seek treatment at a hospital. Progress still has to be made.
@flyingmonkeyelephant Thanks loads for your wonderful & inspiring advice - it's great to hear you've spoken to your doctor and have received positive support from them. It's really helpful to hear this, so thanks again for sharing your thoughts.
All the best,
Chris @ TheSite.org
And lol forgot to say watching this film that Dr is really nice I wouldn't mind going to her and talking about my problems its just ashame that not every Dr is like that.
im now 19
I just want to hide it. I don’t need help I’ve been clean for a long time. I just want to hide it and pretend nothing ever happened and be happy. No more worries or anxiety or being petrified when some nurse asks you to roll up your sleeves.
Hey there,
It’s understandable that you’d like to hide your scars and would find questions about your scars to be intrusive and unnecessary now that you’ve stopped self-harming.
If you are interested, you may want to check out our articles on honouring your scars www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/how-i-decided-to-honour-my-self-harm-scars-40041.html to help with trying to accept them rather than feel ashamed. You can also check out our article on skin camouflage www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/how-can-skin-camouflage-help-with-my-self-harm-scars-40069.html to help cover your scars.
If you are looking for further support and you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ where you can chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
All the best,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
@@TheMixUK thank you. I will check some of these out.
Exactly whe my friends found out they just said don't do it, just be normal. If we had that option wouldn't we take it? I don't do it for attention else why did I hide it for two years (not long but is still going)? I choose to self harm as it my best option from what I can see/express. It's SH or suicide for me (and I want to live).
well, i got caught with my parents but i go to a psychiatry center once a week now . i've gone there once so far & she cant tell my parents anything cause im 14. but anything under 14 they tell .
I'm not from the UK, but I think it means general practitioner. Like a family doctor the one you see for yearly checkups for school and so on....not 100% positive though.
i live in south west, i should go see her.... (y)
@TheSiteVideos but i dont live anywhere near one and my parents dont know i self harm?:/
What's the name of this movie
Hi there,
This video was a collaboration between The Mix and Dr. Gemma Newman. The title of this video is “Self-harm: What happens when you see a doctor? ft. Dr. Gemma Newman | The Mix”
We also have an accompanying article for this video that you can check out here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/going-to-your-gp-about-self-harm-5688.html
All the best,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
How to stop hurting yourself without knowing it?
Hey there,
Sorry to hear you are hurting yourself and not being very aware of it.
Wanting to recover from self-harm can feel difficult but it’s always worth it. You might like to check out our article on starting your recovery from self-harm, here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html During your recovery, you may still feel urges to self-harm and sometimes it can be tempting to give in to the urge. However, you might want to check out our article on dealing with urges to help with that www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/dealing-with-urges-to-self-harm-5698.html Equally, and perhaps more so if you self-harm and aren’t very aware of it, it’s good to find alternatives to self-harm, such as the suggestions listed in our article here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html If you find that you have realised you are self-harming while or just after it, try not to be hard on yourself and take the time to check in with yourself and see if you can use a coping technique instead.
When we aren’t very aware of ourselves or our actions, we may not be living mindfully. Mindfulness helps us to pay attention to ourselves, our bodies and the world around us more. For more information on mindfulness, feel free to check out our article here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/mental-health-treatments/mindfulness-5964.html
Lastly, if you’d like more support and are between the ages of 13-25 and in the UK, feel free to join our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to supporting recovery from self-harm.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Please help.. I need help but I don’t know how to ask my parents for it.. I need a therapist or something.. I know this is different but idk where to ask.. please..
hey are you still there?
Hi there,
Sorry to hear that you need help but don’t know how to ask your parents for it. It can be scary opening up about how you have been feeling, but can be very worth it when you can get the support you need.
If you are struggling with self-harm and want to talk to your parents about it, you might find our article on telling someone you self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/telling-someone-you-self-harm-5682.html helpful. You can also adjust it to talk about mental health or anything that’s on your mind. If you are in the UK and under 25, you can also sign up to our discussion boards community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/index.php?categoryid=1 a forum dedicated to recovering from self-harm and Befrienders Worldwide www.befrienders.org/ are always there to listen (you don’t have to be suicidal to talk to them).
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
When I selfed harm my self it was in 5th grade it was because I was mad and sad cause my dad said I’m the worst child ever and saying mean stuff to me cause I did something wrong I’ve regretted doing it I only did it once and I’m never doing it again it was dumb of me my mom and dad don’t know cause I don’t know how to tell them some of my friends asked what happened cause I don’t want to hide my scares but I don’t say anything to them and I’m planning to come out soon does anyone know what I should say....
Hi, this must have been really difficult for you. We don't provide support through our RUclips comments section, but if you wish to access our support services, you can find them here: www.themix.org.uk/get-support
Would they tell your parents if your under 16?
I got scared to half death at the doctor's today it was so close like they needed me to take my shirt of and I just self harmed like right before the appointment and I was like fuck so I started saying no no no no pls don't then they let me keep it on thank god
Hey there,
It sounds like it was a stressful time for you at the doctors and trying to hide your self-harm.
If you are looking for support for self-harm, you might want to check out our article on steps to self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html as well as how to cope with a self-harm relapse www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/how-to-cope-with-a-self-harm-relapse-5684.html
If you would like more support, and you live in the UK and are between the ages of 13-25, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also speak to our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/ a forum dedicated to supporting people recover from self-harm.
Take care,
Maisy@TheMix
I'm going to see the doctor tomorrow and that's what I'm nervous about...I'm scared that they'll tell my parents about it or mention it in front of them
See its stuff like that it makes me feel like the Dr in the video is just trying to get rid of you If i came to you and you told me to go to someone diff I picked you for a reason we just can't tell anyone what's going on afiad of being locked up in the nut house I picked you because it felt safe now you want to send me away is how I would feel is sad and alone
All these people in the comments are talking about their gp’s being non understanding. My mum is taking me to a gp soon... I’m scared my gp will be like the people’s in the comments...
Hey there,
It’s understandable that reading through the comments where many people have felt misunderstood when talking to health professionals about their self-harm can leave you feeling anxious about your own appointment with your GP. However, just because some people have had negative experiences, it doesn’t mean that you will have negative experiences either. While some professionals may not understand self-harm, there will be many who do.
You might want to read through our accompanying article on going to the GP about self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/going-to-your-gp-about-self-harm-5688.html It makes an important point at the end that if you don’t feel comfortable with a health professional and feel that they don’t understand you, then you can find another GP instead.
If you’d like more support and you are between the ages of 13-25 and live in the UK, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ or contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
Hope the GP appointment goes smoothly!
Take care
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
I want to tell my dad bc I trust him but I'm scared
Hi there,
It’s understandable that you are scared to open up to your dad about your self-harm but it’s good that you do want to talk to him about it. If you’d like, you might want to read our article on how to talk to someone about self-harm here: www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harming-heres-how-to-talk-to-someone-about-it-35999.html
You might also want to check out our articles on steps to self-harm recovery www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/steps-to-self-harm-recovery-5697.html as well as self-harm coping tips and distractions www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harm-coping-tips-and-distractions-5696.html
If you’d like more support, and you are in the UK and between the ages of 13-25, feel free to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact us directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Sounds like the usual UK GP.There are good GP's out there,my first one after moving was useless and uninterested.I learned of a GP in the same surgery who was highly spoken of.I went to see him and he's great,so needless to say I changed GP's.He's the only good one in the place out of six GP's.
What's a GP?
ikr
General practitioner (doctor) 😊
hey man if i see a gp then that means id be looking to recover. the fuck is that good for LOL
Well last time I went to the doctor I got admitted so
Hi there,
Sorry to hear your experience of going to the doctor and ending up being admitted. That must’ve been difficult for you.
As the video explained, doctors are there to help you so try not to let the last experience stop you from getting the help you need and deserve.
If you are under 25 and in the UK, and you’d like support, feel free to reach out to our team: www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team or join our discussion boards: community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place to chat and get support from other young people.
Take care,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Whats a gp
general practitioner...... in other words a doctor
My gp put a bandage on my wrist without cleaning it after a Suic*** attempt thank god she was fired
Hi there,
That GP doesn’t sound very professional and I’m sorry you had that experience!
I hope you have a better GP now. You might want to check out our article on seeing a GP for self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/going-to-your-gp-about-self-harm-5688.html for insight into how professionals might treat self-harm.
If you are looking for further support, and you are between the ages of 13-25, and live in the UK, you might want to join our online community community.themix.org.uk/ for a safe place you can vent and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support.
Stay strong,
Maisy@TheMix
I don't trust anyone I know
Hi there,
It can be difficult to work out who you can and can’t trust when opening up about self-harm. Unfortunately, sometimes some people don’t understand and may say hurtful things as a result. But don’t let that stop you from reaching out for the help and support you need.
You might want to check out our article on talking about self-harm www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/self-harm/self-harming-heres-how-to-talk-to-someone-about-it-35999.html As it mentions, even if you don’t have anyone in your life that you feel you can trust, you could reach out to mental health professionals or charities.
If you are looking for more support, and you are in the UK and between the ages of 13-25, feel free to sign up to our online community community.themix.org.uk/ where you can vent, chat and get support from other young people. You can also contact our team directly www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team for one-to-one support. Alternatively, there is always RecoverYourLife www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/ a forum dedicated to recovering from self-harm.
Stay strong,
Mary-Ellen@TheMix
Wont. Be. Scary. Honey, you don't know. You don't know the first thing that comes to mind. Don't lie to so many people.
This video is older than me by 5 months lmao anyways I don't know why I serached this anyways um yea I think it's cool how the video is so old
General Practitioner :) (doctor)
Ok