I Lived As A Man For 18mths - Listen To What Happened
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- Опубликовано: 11 июл 2024
- Reaction to Norah Vincent disguised as a man.
Self-Made Man (2006) retells an eighteen-month experiment in the early 2000s in which
Norah Vincent disguised herself as a man. Watch until the end.
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0:32 - Nora's 18-month experiment where she lived as a man, known as Ned.
1:39 - She used makeup, clothing, and voice training to transform into a man.
3:16 - Nora joined a men's bowling team
9:00 - Sexuality is different for men compared to women.
9:25 - Nora went to strip clubs and tried picking up women
9:40 - She discovered what many women are attracted to
10:30 - Nora went on about 30 dates with women
13:55 - She infiltrated all-male inner sanctums
15:00 - Nora joined a men-only therapy group
16:00 - The pressure of being someone she's not
18:00 - Nora's conclusions
18:50 - After the experiment
19:15 - Nora's suicide
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Men, we must Be Disciplined, Be Focused, Become. Stay on your purpose 💪
Please refrain from posting content where people use God's name in vain.
A whole lot of kids don't get love from their mothers at all or their mothers expect something in return. I'd say that's the majority, even. Especially among single-mothers.
Why are you using her suicide for your political message?
@@Fun_Kick
What suicide??
@@Fun_Kick He's spreading her message. Don't you think that's what she wanted and would have wanted now?
You are the one "using" her suicide in your comment to absurdly try to shame a good action.
Men in groups insult each other, but they don't really mean it.
Women in groups compliment each other.
But they don't really mean it.
🤣
DEEP.
Hey you know if my best friend doesn't flip me off in the morning I'm calling him to find out what's wrong with him lol not even kidding either that or telling me Mom should have swallowed or something like that 😂😂😂 every insult from him is a compliment;)
Exactly. Women talk trash behind each other's backs. Men will usually do it to your face.
My favorite greeting to my Bros..WHAT YA DOIN FUKK FACE??!!👍
Imagine having no acknowledgment . No recognition. No appreciation . For anything you do. Ever. That is the beginning
That is most men's entire existence.
There will be no seat in the lifeboat for us, if anything at all goes wrong. And we go through life full well,knowing this. ( and often reminded)
And also the ending forany people that take this shit too far.
Part of being a man is not needing to be babied and told good job it’s your damn job suck it up ! Your a man
Yeah. And you are only valued for what you can bring to the table. Women might value connection, but connection is cognitive and easily rationalized away if you fall off your high horse.
She at least tried it, she did more for equality than any modern feminist ever could try.
best comment 💯
"ever *would try"
Feminism is the opposite of equality
she proved the opposite of what she was supposed to prove. in the end the lgbt community turned against her because they didnt want to accept straight men have it harder
See this mentality is not helping either. Sure you find some kids online who go off the rails. But if you actually read modern feminist text it is very clear that there is a recognition of this problems. Take "toxic" masculinity for example. The internet makes you believe that it is about being a man is a problem. But the actual political discussion is about behaviour that is typical attribute to man which hurts others or themselves more than it helps for example the notion that "mam are always strong and can't show weaknesses" Or that "man have to be muscular or else they are not real man" In that case it is not inherently bad to want to be muscular, but its bad that tge pressure is put on every boy from a jung age. Other examples, modern feminist do recognise that man are as well suffering greatly under patriarchy, unless there are one of the few that profit from it. However while also many woman do help in force that system man are still much more complicat in it. You comment shows that you seam to have a view on feminism that is eighter shaped by the internet ( which would be a problem for every political ideology because you will find idiots on the internet for every thing) or it is shaped by ppl who aren't feminist telling you what feminist apparently want. Sure i will agree that we have focused more on woman probelms but that is because woman are participating in much greater numners so those issues obviously are more pressing for the group. But in the end feminist just want that ppl get treated respectfully regardless of gender, that ppl get judged by their skills regardless of gender, that everyone can do what is best for their skillset regardless of gender, that everyone can freely choose their intrests, express their need, and that there is no power dynamic between different genders. If that would be achieved, not only womans problems would disappear but mans as well. Because then they can choos to be strong but don't have to, they can show their emotions and not get laughed at etc etc etc
This was filmed around 2000, it has gotten 1000x worse since then.
Didn't realize this was back then, yeah the issue is insane now. Hell even finding someone to date that is sane nowadays is nuts
I have hope for the younger generations, boys are being taught about emotions and there is at least some awareness now of the struggles facing men and boys. There seems to be more acceptance, love and appreciation in the circle's that I am a part of. I hope it comes your way soon!
Yep now they want us to hate ourselves.
Agreed as a male I'm scared to start up conversation anymore out of fear
@@fargonthebravebest not for your safety , career and future . Keep words to a utmost bare minimum
Remember-- -when she came back as a woman after the experiment, she was bullied and treated horribly by her far left community, because she didn't prove how easy men had it (as she set out to do) - This played a huge part in her mental health not just the experiment.
Indeed
Didn't she commit suicide a while after..?
That's not far left, that's far right.
@@TheReaverOfDarknessits far left because its all liberals
The left believes men have it easy. Explain why yoy said its the right. @@TheReaverOfDarkness
Let's not forget she did this in the early 2000's. It's only gotten worse since then. Men are more vilified and reviled than they ever have been in the past.
Oh!
This was that old?!?😮
Early 2000’s!
I was shocked!!!😳🤐☹️
After all that positivity…
suicide…💔💔💔
😢
In fact, suicides are up 37% since this happened, 80% of which are men.
It's gotten so much worse, and only looks to keep worsening.
This is why I'm moving to the Philippines.
@@peanutnukleDecent plan. Women are still women, but they need men more so they still know how to attract and keep men. Just don't bring one back to the west, they become just like all the others very quickly if you do that.
Unfortunately
That’s so sad she died. She seemed like a genuinely respectful and empathetic person that tried to get the truth out. RIP Norah
OMG 😪😪😪
Norah Vincent. A woman who went from being a feminist hating men with such vitriol and complete lack of sympathy for half the population, to being unable to cope with reality of life from men's point of view and speaking up because she had a voice that mattered. A story that should be told a lot more than it is, a person I will always respect
This is why women was eat the famous apple...The womens 80% can acting like normal...but they are evil too 5% are the womens who real normal and 15% who dont acting because she dont care about maybe because looking good...and she know she can manipulate everybody!
Open eye's guys dont be nice for women just because of the good looking...they use this and AlWAYS trying manipulate!!!
She seems like she had good intentions but she wasn't a strong person. Not physically but mentally. She was easily sucked into the misandric mentality in the far left. Then failed to truly embrace life as a man. Then when she tried to voice her "findings" for lack of a better term, she was verbally attacked by fools. Anyone with any amount of backbone or mental fortitude could have moved on. Sadly she decided to take the easy way out. Thats weakness
@@zacp2770 I don't think you know her story well at all and it shows.
"Failing life as a man" she was one of the first people to be vocal about how mentally damning it can be to live in such a way as majority of men do. Isolated with constantly being told its their fault for things put of their control. She ended the experiment early as it was becoming detrimental to her health and mainly she said that she started to hate woman for the way the treated her.
What you said was extremely dismissive, disrespectful, and confusing that you'd want to minimalize one of the only Femenists and woman at the time that would speak out on behalf of men
@zacp2770 what. You don't even know 99% of her life. Just this story.
Here's something this documentary didnt go over. Ive heard that Nora tried to share her experience and views about men and was attacked by the LGBT community and she felt abandoned and misunderstood and that happened shortly before she took her life.
Not just the community, feminism in general buried her and her efforts. She was called a traitor, sell-out, and more.
@tachyon8317 The worst part about that is they did it out of guilt, because she was right, they knew it, and they didn't want to accept it. And very few have since. Women used to understand the disconnect, at least on an academic level. Now, they've been at this toxic empowerment thing that took over actual feminism for so long, been watching and making videos self reinforcing their own myths, that they can't even begin to see how far off the deep end they've gone.
the devil always attack the truthful, the just and that with love. im a christian. im saying this what nora says since 20y. i get attacked by pretty much anybody.
Source? I don't believe you. People just make stuff up these days.
@@REN-dj5sg this could be made up too. as an made up suspision just by absolute implication.
It’s hard to be a man. Especially when you feel alone. It’s exhausting.
I know, it's like part of you sort of dies or atrophies.
I feel you man
most men think it is gay to feel that way because that is the gayness talking, so man up and stop acting gay! lol so yeah that is why most men will hide it when they are alone or depresses. they dont want to be called gay.
I can't my help myself. I'm sorry for all the pain you have gone and are going through. These are for you. 💐
@ThatsDax
#ToBeAMan
Did you know that most men receive flowers for the first time when they are buried.
I often try to explain to women why men have such a hard time with women. But most women don't understand. I hope this video will reach every woman so that they finally understand.
Given this was filmed in 2000, no.
Even if they understand they dont change, because its conflict of interests
I once bought flowers for my then boyfriend, because I knew he liked flowers and he got a new job. So very fitting. He startwd to cry and told me that is the first time he got flowers and basically he told me the same thing. I was angry, it was the third time he received flowera. The former flowers were more expensive and bigger in folume. I did not have a car back than, so it was really a pain to keep the flowers in one piece 😂 So I was like, if you forget everytime you get flowers, than you are constantly the victim. Boehoe 😂 his best friend (female) also told me she often give him flowers because she knows he likes them 😂😂😂 moral of the story: If you do get flowers in your lifetime, better remember them, your (girl)friend may not respond nicely 😅
@@ashleyftcashyou are lovely girlfriend:)
I have realized im 20 and never been given a flower ,but idgaf honestly.
Just gonna leave my story here:
I was 25 back then. I had a job, lots of friends and a girlfriend. We've been together for 5 years, I was ready to ask her to marry me. I did but she refused, I thought it was my fault. Maybe I did something wrong. But it wasn't my fault... she was cheating on me with a 56 year old lawyer. After I confronted her she said she couldn't see a future with me with my job, all her friends would laugh at her. Suddenly I felt like I wasn't enough, I've never been enough for anyone. We broke up and after a month I got sued for stalking and harassing her. I never did that, it was all over for me as I just tried to continue with my life. She started crying in front of the judge saying I was calling her at night, following her around etc. The judge restrained me from going to the same places she used to go, I had to leave anytime she was around. Not only that, I've lost all my friends or at least who I thought they were. I lost my job and even my family turned against me saying "we raised you better than this". I lost everyone and everything and no one was there for me. I wanted to jump down a building, kill myself and end it all. I was sitting on the rooftop watching down waiting for my mind to be like "let's do it". But before that I started to think about the things I never did and always wanted to. I wanted to make my wishes come true before killing myself. I had some money, I wanted to fly to Los Angeles and waste them all having the time of my life. When I got there I met a french girl at the airport, we made eye contact but I was too cautious. So I looked down. She then asked "are you really that hurt?". She understood the pain I was going through just by looking into my eyes once. We talked, we shared our stories not even knowing each other. The thing between us got even better, we fell in love and spent a whole month together. I was enough for someone, my suicidal thoughts disappeared. I discovered happiness once again. All thanks to a random girl who just asked me if I was ok. God bless her
EDIT: it seems I can't reply to any comment down below so I'll just write it here hoping that @leafy5549 sees this since he/she asked. Thank you for asking btw❤️ obviously we took different paths, she went back to France and I went back to Italy (yeah, I'm Italian). She was also going through some stuff, so we exchanged our numbers to keep in touch and be there for each other. We don't feel good with a long distance relationship. After a few weeks she confessed she still had feelings for me and so did I. We decided to meet halfway and spend a week together in Milan and decide what to do. I'm keeping my expectations low but I really hope we find a solution. I do love her
Thanks for sharing your story man......
I can only brainwash myself that the world is alright. Otherwise, i'm not prepared for this world.
This is the most precious thing ever, I'm so glad you met
Mashallah brother
Dam, This gave me chills- I’m happy you didn’t Jump.❤
In the military we said the meanest shit to eachother and I’ve never felt more loved. Mad respect to the humility of this woman in this experiment
It's reverse psychology. DIs want you to be the best you can be, and truly insult you to push you harder. We all want validation and it's typically the insults that get the best results. From what I've experienced.
Bro literally reminding me of the best and worst 6 years of my life ❤️
Miss the days of true camraderie.
22 years navy retired
It makes you feel part of the gang, a member, not abused or insulted. It’s like humor, don’t try to analyze it, because it will be gone once you do.
I am a 70yo. man and was so glad to have stumbled on this Documentary...... right up to point of the Text announcing Nora Suicide.
This instantly broke my heart and flooded my eyes with Tears.
* The world has lost a truly amazing person.
R.I.P. Nora Vincent
Also keep in mind it was quite some time after this experiment before she ended it. I don’t think her experience was the catalyst.
@@totesmagotes3688 Right. I’m blaming Covid lockdowns.
@@summercoat Yea I think that is more likely. Or at least the isolation exasperated the mental health issues she already had. Either way it is a terrible thing and it pains me when anyone is compelled to end it all.
It did the same thing to me
Yes she was special its so sad such a beautiful soul. 🙏
My father worked in the government and made sure that army contractors actually made vehicles safe for the troops and all the work he did is hidden behind hundreds of pages of paper if recorded at all. He knew that his work wouldn't be attributed to him and his team but he worked hard to the day he died. He told me stories of what he did. His team and I am the only people who will remember what he did. Only after he passed did I realize how hard his life was and how much he put into his work and his family but he never was congratulated never thanked people just expected him to do what he did.
That‘s amazing
That’s terrible
...and who's fault is that? We think that hard work pays off via a pat on the back or financially, when in reality it is just a means to an end. Life is banal at best, we have no idea who we really are or where we come from, unless you believe in a creator and follow his rules. It is a crap shoot and someday we might, just might find the truth of it all, but until then, happy existence.
@@davewallace5008 i think he's just appreciating his old man's masculinity pretty neautral
I teach firearms courses, and one of the things that comes up is suicide (being the cause of the majority of firearms deaths). I go off book a bit, and talk about how an aquaintence of mine had killed himself with a firearm, and how no one had any idea anything was wrong. I later talked about it with a close friend and he looked me right in the eye and told me that he didn't have anyone to talk to about things like that (dude, I'm right here).
Now, my classes are nearly all men, and one of the things I talk about is how it's important to have someone to talk to about these things. I also encourage them to make sure their friends know that they will listen to them.
It's a difficult discussion, for sure. I just hope some of them take what I say to heart.
I can almost guarantee you've saved at least one life by talking about it and by getting other people to talk about it, although you'll probably never know whose life it was.
@@Adrian-yi8fl thanks. I'm not going to stop.
This is an important step in the right direction, Ian. I'm proud of you for bringing awareness to these issues.
Firearms are designed to kill, so they are such an easy solution. Another reason why most countries have strict limitations on who can have a gun. I think speaking about that and being there in case someone wants to talk, is an important part of the training. Probably it should be the default. I'm glad at least you are doing it.
RIP Norah Vincent.
If "it" died in that sin, there isn't any peace where "it" is... You should be grieved because hell has claimed another soul...
@@johnsondavies2029 It? What's that supposed to mean?
@@vladimirofsvalbard9477
First "she"was then "he" was, back to a "she"... a life of confusion ["it"]
@@johnsondavies2029 That's because she was pretending to be a man in order to gain 'male' perspective.
Did the entire story elude you?
@@johnsondavies2029sin isn't a book. It's an attitude. Don't follow false prophets who write books.
I love the end where it says "Men, you're not alone".
Paying someone 300 bucks an hour to listen to you is pretty close to being alone.
I'd pay my wife more to stop listening to me. :)
@cheapbastard990 then you're with the wrong person.
But I like being alone
Never be friend with someone who hates loneliness. Owing to Schopenhauer if you enjoy loneliness you may be a genius
She probably left earth becasue as a lesbian she was probably heaped with the responsibilities that men have and decided it was long enough, once women go through menopause we want to rest, be grandmas, homemakers, working and the rat race SUCKS after 50, but before that it’s awesome, she probably felt age would never have anyone to care for her or give her a break
I've been married for almost 20 years. My wife and I have seven children together. I feel like the last 20 years have been spent almost exclusively making me the villain in my own home. I feel like I'm failing my children because Mommy always rushes to the rescue any time I try to discipline and instruct them. "Your dad's just a dick." "Why do you always have to be such an asshole?" "You're just a cold, heartless robot and we're not like you." Now listen, when I say Mommy always rescues them, I mean always. There is no respect in my house by anyone, for anyone. I don't want to be part of this anymore, but i refuse to abandon my children. I'm lost. I think about unsubscribing from life every day, multiple times a day. I know that I can't do that to my kids and never will, but the thought is there. I have other thoughts, too, about her, equally violent but less deadly. I think about the suffering I can never express because she will either dismiss me or use it against me later. I have no peace.
Update: I'm filing tomorrow. Happy Independence Day!
I think you are burned out from all the weight in your shoulders, my brother.
Take a vacation to relax for your own sake and your family’s sake. Speak to someone (a priest or a psychologist or a friend). Don’t suffer in silence and try to fight your demons in the dark! Suffering is part of life!
@@user-ci7fz5kp8e I really appreciate you taking time to respond. I'll take your advice. I welcome the suffering, but every now and then I can't help thinking, "God, are you REALLY sure I can take this?" He seems to have a much higher opinion of me than I do.
Hello my friend, I myself had some similar unsubscription thoughts as a direct result of me being unappreciated for what I was worth. You said you don't want to abandon your kids. That is a great start. Please keep in mind that either if you end yourself or if you harm your wife in any way, you will either end up dead or in jail, which will mean abandoning them as well. I believe you can handle much more than you think you can. And for what it's worth, if you decide to divorce your wife, you will still be a part of your children's lives, more than in jail or just a memory of a dad, who ended himself. My parents divorced after 22 years of marriage when I was 14 and my brother was 9. My father left my mother with everything he built for the family and he payed some hefty child support, but as I see it, he is very happy now. I would think that we both turned out to be just fine, we had plenty of contact with both parents even if we stayed at my father's place only every other weekend. We are both adults now and we both see our parents at the same rate, we don't hold any grudges against anyone and our relationship is fine. What I am trying to get at is that when you get to the point you think has no logical good outcome and you want to do something really stupid, remember that just a plain divorce is always a good and logical option which in any way does not point towards you failing as a father nor as a husband. If you don't get appreciated in your household, you either wait until your kids become adults and get a divorce, or if at any point you feel you cannot handle it anymore, you should do it immediately. There is no excuse for what that woman is doing to you, but as I see you as a man with great values, you don't deserve being treated like this and I promise you there is a woman waiting for you out there who will really appreciate you for who you are. I will leave you with some key points to keep in mind in your everyday life: 1. Every bad situation in the world has some good solutions even if you don't see them right away. 2. Harming yourself or others is never a good solution even in the most extreme situations. If others don't value you for who you are, you should find your value yourself and embrace it. 3. There will always be people in this world, who will try to bring you to your knees. At the same time there will always be many people who will love you for who you really are. If and when you find them, keep them close. They will be the ones to make your life a million times more enjoyable. 4. This one is just for lightening the mood, but seriously, please stop making more babies with that woman. I appreciate you for sharing your struggles and I really feel that you do deserve some unconditional happiness. Be strong. Your whole life does not have to be a struggle. I am not a Christian so I am not the type to pray, but let's just say, I want you to be happy and I hope your life turns for the better. I will be thinking of you for a long time. And if I didn't mention it enough, please don't do anything stupid. Godspeed.
@@MrVajco666 Huh. Thanks, I needed that more than I thought. Kinda at a loss for words here, which doesn't happen to me that often. You may not be Christian, but I am, and you just worked your way onto the prayer list.
@@jordancarmack584 I totally agree with everything @MrVajco666 said. There is also another aspect that I think should be considered... By staying and suffering, are you not teaching your children that her treatment of you is acceptable? Do you want them to emulate this in their future relationships? After all, children learn how to be women and men from observing their parents. My situation wasn't as bad as yours, but I made the decision of leaving, after 17 years. And it was by far, the right decision for me. I stayed very involved in my childrens lives, even now that they're grown. Find a way forward where you're happy and content.
A lot of women are not self aware of how they come across to their spouse
I told my husband one day out of the blue, that I appreciate him, and the look on his face said it all, right then in there I knew he needed to hear that. Women need to show how much we appreciate all they do. One word can make a big difference in someone life, and men women need to hear the same thing. R.I.P. Nora Vincent.🌹
I'm glad you did that. My ex-wife never said anything remotely close and only ever apologized twice.
@@johannesswillery7855Then she wasn't worth it and wasn't the right one.
That's gayyyyyyy.
I've been in a relationship where she never once, with sincere words told me that she liked or appreciated me.
Obviously there were nonverbal cues or it would've been dead from the get-go.
The closest she ever got was calling me ugly.
Which by her own explanation was her way of showing appreciation.
Have to admit though, it never did the trick.
A relationship is otherwise often one of the few times in a man's life when he feels like there's someone who actually gives a damn.
So yeah, without going too deep into the whole gender thing.
You might've left an even bigger impression on your husband than you can imagine with that small gesture.
By even writing this comment it shows that you're aware and that's beautiful.
I can confirm that when a guy truly loves a woman and gets a compliment like that, it creates a deep imprint on them and becomes a core memory for them.
She just touched the iceberg of what us men endure.its a start in empathy.but kudos for her attempt at understanding .
"She touched the iceberg ..." Well said.
Empathy is a fictional word created by the Sophists. There is no such thing as an empath.
It's possible she felt enough to let it affect her to the point it ruined her life and she killed herself - but that's just a guess. Perhaps Bill Clinton is the only one with the power to actually feel your pain.@@TKKrueger-py5jb
@@TKKrueger-py5jb looks like someone cares nothing about what someone goes through.has been hurt by others and has accepted the pain inflicted upon him.let me guess.single place is a mess and blames others for own faults
I disagree with men's burden being an iceberg...Each man bears the weight of the whole world on his shoulders. And each faithful man, the weight of the world, plus the heft of heaven and hell, as well. We women never give any of you your due. I honestly hope we will be judged for that in the great and terrible day of the judgment of The Lord
Being a man:
- You're always wrong, even when you're right.
- You're expected to be Superman, Rockefeller, Leonardo DaVinci and John Holmes all in one and that is just the entry level.
- You're expected to risk your life at the first signal of danger for people who will never appreciate you and won't even bother remembering your name.
- You're treated like some sort of creep just because you look in the woman's general direction.
- You're expected to succeed in life even when / especially when all the odds are stacked against you.
- you're evaluated by your bank account and your physical attributes.
Such privilege
Everything will change it's just a matter of time 🤗🤗
@@Logic-Lion And the pendulum will swing way too far in the opposite direction. Again. Because people just can't help themselves not to turn every single good idea into a fucking parody of itself.
No wrong at all ! I always said we’re just a mindless robot that cannot complain that’s all we are
If you don't like such standards being applied to you, then work to change them - especially by not applying the same sort of "can't win" standards toward women.
There's a reason soldiers miss war, as stupid as it may sound. In war they have a purpose, they can make the difference between life and death of their friends. They are surrounded by people who are in the same shit they are and understand them. If normal life can't compare to war life, that means we have a serious problem when it comes to men.
I'm a trans girl, but as a guy, I was always more sensitive than other guys. When women joked about mens' issues, or mocked men for being sensitive, or anything like that, I took it so personally. It still hurts me deeply that some women out there will make such harsh comments about a group who are expected to keep their emotions to themselves. The fact that it's more difficult for men to make genuine connections with people only compounds the issue. There's a reason most s***ide attempts are men.
Women really don't understand what we deal with, and we don't understand what they deal with, noone has it easy, we just need to support each other
100%
Since I'm not a man I can only sympathize.
I'm glad I'm not a man and not bc of the current culture.
My heart breaks for men and how hard it must be every day not to say or do something wrong.
Be strong bc I believe the loudest voices belong to the fewest (and dumbest) voices.
Real men are loved and wanted
Well said
Well said.
So true! I hate the "battle of the sexes." We need each other, and we need to support each other.
I must be weird, because I've always known how great men are. Maybe it's because I had big brothers, who only showed up if I was in need, but hung back, watching, telling me I could do it. When I had children, and ran out of gas, it was never women who pulled over within 2 minutes. It was always a man, who seeing me, stranded with 2 babies, pulled over so quickly, it was surprising. They were afraid of what might happen to a young mother and her babies, never asked for money, or a thanks. Women are mean, and competitive.
Yep! Women are judgmental and like to tear each other down. I worked in a company ran by women. They bragged they were fair and held women up. It was by far the worst place I’ve worked. They under paid, made to work 60 hour weeks without overtime, over powered/triangulated, wishy washy, back stabbing and more. I tried to stick it out but it was too mentally draining. I carried the abuse I got at work home and my weekends was trying to forget my job but it was always in my mind.
Agreed, I am right there with you sister.
Thanks for the compliment. I have two sisters that I protect fiercely. I will step in if they threaten to make a bad decision. Then go back to monitoring.😊
Oh yes they sure are!
@@derrickparran Not many around like you to keep them in check & keep them in Reality.
I'm 57 male, straight, single by divorce, blue collar used to be white collar and middle class. I never feel like I need more intimacy from my buddies or feel the need to share my deepest feelings. Those things belong to me and only I really understand them and need to deal with them. I never feel that as a burden. I need and enjoy plenty of time alone. The time I spend with my friends is an escape, time to catch up and have some laughs. The men I call friends are wired very much the same.
Exactly this
Then why are men saying they feel lonely
I don't know any. @@gaia7240
Because of women
All I can hope for is that she opened at least one person's eyes to what men go through.
RIP Norah
I’m a 65yo man and I KNOW that I’m not the only man that was wiping tears from their eyes while watching this.
the only woman in the world that understood men and she killed herself.. now i understand when someone says: this world is a mean place!
Don’t be a 👧🏼 😂😂
Sorry, but that’s how men talk to each other and I got erased! kind of the point of this video
Crying is weird, but relieving. The people who shame or belittle men when they show emotions, whatsoever, are evil. It's OK to call out an a..hole, but the majority of men are good. Me, I go into tear mode so easily. A beautiful sight, a beautiful song, a poignant movie scene ( like the " it's not your fault " scene in Good Will Hunting ), a warm human behavior. These things get to me right to the core in a flash. I've cried in public briefly a couple of times, in broad daylight mind you. I'll never feel ashamed. That's me. Someone got something against ? It's their right. Maybe they need to love themselves a little better before they judge. I'm proud of you Dave. Thanks for your comment man.
You actually are...
It's rare for a man to have a male friend to confide in so most of us are just screaming and crying on the inside at the same time for most of our lives, never able to let anything show on the outside. I am truly saddened by the suicide of Norah as any life lost is a tragedy although I thank her for her commitment to show the true side of most men and the immense struggles we deal with every day to be "a man". Thank you Norah and the author of this video.
That hits hard man
Men do not cry ... on the inside or outside. Do not let anyone even think that you and cry are in same sentence.
I have a lot of male friends. I don't find it difficult at all.
If you are honest & respectful, & they know that you will watch their back ... they will die for you.
And to say that men can't express their emotions is the same as saying that women are too emotional.
*
I think men are emotional & can clearly express them.
They just need a person who they trust. They don't do it in public.
Men please consider joining a bible based church small men's group.
Poor simulation...you only know how it is - to be a man...when you where born as a boy...
I just wanna give every men a hug and say sorry. You are so valued and appreciated. We love you. You are so strong. Please stay here. We women do live on easy mode. I tried to defend men and women call me misogynist, self hating woman, brainwashed and pick me girl. We women are so evil in a manipulative way.
Wow. It just doesn’t seem like women could care about men anymore. I sure hope you’re sincere!
Stop lying.
Thank you.
It sounds believable, but where's the validation?
Untill I hear a murdercast of another man killing man/wemon/childeren who were acting upon their uge to chop their loved once...
Why is it that when men need empathy and be treated as another human, woman are evil, toxic etc. Can we just be open for everyone needs, don't downplay each others worries and show empathy from time to time. Tanx
I guess the thing I hate about this experiment was that she revealed herself as a woman to everyone she was undercover from. At the end of the day she had an escape from it all. Try walking away without closure or validation. Imagine if you walked away from that woman you were hitting on forever letting her believe you were a creepy man. You forgot about the element of dispare. The moments you don't get closure or have the opportunity to justify yourself. It's okay if you come off as creepy as you want because you just come back around the corner as a woman and suddenly everything is okay. A big part of being a man is those silent moments alone of self therapy. Those moments when no one is there for you and at worst the world is against you. It's a really cheap and disingenuous cop out.
most truthful comment here
As a guy, I had a bunch of things I wanted to say, but reading that she committed suicide brought tears to my eyes.
Murdered. Utter disgrace
She should have gone back to her buddies at the bowling club.
not only yours
My gay sister -in- law who has the male role in her relationship said to me once, " I did not know how tough it could be to be a man, it's tough." I have respected her for her honesty since.
She still doesn’t know what it means to be a man. A woman will never understand. Likewise men will never understand what it is to be a woman.
It would hard for me to pretend to be a dolphin. but that would not make me an expert of dolphin life.
The funny this is, look at how easy it is for gay men... The problem seems pretty obvious lol
She is not, a man tho, she doesnt know crap.
I have 0 respect for Ls trying to get sympathy points from men. It must be the most pathetic attention seeking behavior you can see.
Tell her to stop pretending and go back to her female role
New trend on tiktok: would you rather find yourself in the woods with a man or a bear. I said it all.
I know you can be, if not are already, the kind of man women would choose over bear.
As women, we are raised with the expectations of being kind, empathetic, gentle. We internalize these values and hence expect more kindness from women than from men. On the other hand, we are told all our life to be careful in the dark, when night fall, when we are alone. To look back, to spot if someone follows us. We are taught prey mentally, to survive, and we are taught to recognize possible hunters. It's a reality that most physical violence (85% in my country) are committed by men.
Socialisation is a self fulfilling prophecy. And all of us are both results/victims of it and perpetrators.
I personally would choose the man. But I like how this dilemma emphasizes the cruelty human behavior can reach compared to physically dangerous animal who are not morally bad.
It was really striking to hear sentences such as "you won't have to eat at the same table with a bear who just attacked you", "no one will ask what you were wearing when the bear hunted you", "no one will hush you because the bear as a great job and it would ruin his family to call it out".
I'm just a bit sad because it will yet again solidify men as being potential hunters, while women can too. I'm sad for the men out there who are also kind and not violent.
I'm a 26 year old man that just got an eviction notice whilst attending college. Some of my female housemates had suspicion that I might physically harm them because twice I went outside to scream as loud as I could. I've lived here for over a year. The girls got together, talked to the landlords, and got me evicted without even talking to me about it. I would never hurt a soul, and I don't know what I'm more shocked about, the fact that they heard me and only thought about themselves, or the fact that my landlords never considered my side of the story.
Sorry about that.Try running or lifting weights it helps to take out what you have inside
And why didn't you talk to them instead of screaming like a maniac?
Nora was judging all men by her standards, understandably. But men aren't the way they are by accident, it isn't a failing. Men are disposed to ignore their feelings so they can be injured yet still kill that buffalo to feed the family, or an enemy on the battlefield. What society has lost, is the recognition of men and what they bring to society. People have turned it into a man v women battle, which is as pathetic as comparing apples and oranges. They are both good, but different, and either can be rotten. RIP Nora.
Very well said
@@tstouff65 Thank you.
Yes, that was well said. I’m a woman, a mother of 3 boys, and I often said to my husband you teach them and listen to them, because you understand and they understand you better than I can. I love my sons very much, and my husband does too, but my husband understood them better. And today I can say men just think differently, it’s in their DNA❤❤
Very well said.
Men and women are both sinners alike. So not good in front of God.
But Jesus came and sacrificed Himself for our sins, so when we believe in Him, His blood washes us free from sin and He gives us His righteousness.
I wish I could shake this woman’s hand and say, thank you. 😢
I hope more people listen to her story.
Sometimes the algorithm works perfectly.
I needed to watch this documentary, and randomly picked it out of curiosity.
She didn't even get to really live all the worst a man goes through like treason, contempt, divorce, loosing everything being pre-judged by everyone. And yet, she was very smart to understand everything in her short journey. RIP Ned&Norah 🙌
anesthetic free circumcision
@@juzeus9that's a weird one. Nobody tell you to do that to yourself 🙄
@@lmartinmiami82 it happens to 2700 babies every day in america
@@juzeus9 incredible... and parents agree with that? 🤯 some specialists point out that causes hormonal trauma for life. In Europe only Jewish and Muslims have these practices.
@@lmartinmiami82 parents are ignorant beyond words. doctors are priests of their religion. have you heard of the milgram experiment?
I can sum it up for her - every day is a battle in the war against all the crap that wants to destroy us physically, financially and emotionally. Every day we suffer battle wounds that add-up over time. There are no hands out for help. It's a private battle all men fight. The best a man can hope for is a loving and supportive partner and family to make the battle worth fighting.
Very well said
👍🏻nailed it
Women have problems dreadful problems . But men have dreadful problems too. I think women are allowed to cry and have sisterhood of sorts . It's harder this way for men.
Sucks the divorce rate is so abysmal.
Time to change the world-we need a version of success that doesn't start and end with money and power.
The world lost a gifted artist and insightful writer. People like her who try to bridge the gap between people so that we can embrace each other's humanity is so rare but so needed. Her life had meaning and has encouraged many a lonely man locked inside Societie's expectations of masculinity. 🎉❤
Truly awful outcome. The world needs more, not fewer, thoughtful and intelligent people like Nora.
This was a very insightful documentary. I loved that the people that Nora met as Ned accepted her after the fact. The revelation at the end of her suicide knocked me for 6. I’m 52. I struggle with depression and anxiety. To read in some of the comments that she was apparently attacked by her own community for what she discovered and spoke about is incredibly sad. It’s hard enough being you in society. It shouldn’t be hard being you in your “circle”. RIP Nora.
RIP Nora. Thank you for taking the time to try understand, and i hope more is done in this field... but i can only wonder how it is no one was there for you when you needed it. The mind can whirlpool into hopelessness with insidious impulses, self imploding while convinced its coping... only intervention from family, friends or aquaintances detecting the change and calling it out, "shocking" that damaged mind into realising help is needed... dammet Nora's friends where were you all 🥺😞
I have a lot of guy friends who quietly endure a lot of emotional pain and it really hurts to see. I listen to them without judgment but trying to create a safe space for them seems like a huge challenge because they get suspicious that they're being set up. It's pretty heartbreaking.
TRUTH
The world is extremely hostile to many of us since childhood. We suffer a lot of physical, verbal and emotional abuse with rare occasions of empathy shown towards us. In such circumstances you start believing that everyone is out to get you in one way or another. The weaker among us give in to the pressure and become hateful and start hurting others, following simple urges. The stronger ones remain kind to people but always keeping our gard up. As a toll of everything that happened to me in my life I'm currently struggling with severe depression(along with some other health issues)and financially at 37. My future looks very bleak but I'm not the type to give up so I'll keep fighting. Thank you for trying to help out your guys.
9 times out of 10, us opening up is weaponized against us or outright dismissed. So we'd rather just deal with it internally in some way than trust someone else. After about the 3rd time being burned that way, you stop hoping and just say you're fine.
We all have our outlets for it. A way to deal with the pain we feel inside but rarely even acknowledge to ourselves.
@@GatsuKSbut how come males do not help eachother. I mean, 50 percent of population are men. Surely men could help eachother and not just wait for a woman to emotionaly help them.
@@mycroft1650 oercent of population are males. Thats like every other person. Are Ou telling me that if you open up to another men he will use it against you as a weapon? Or you do not open up to any men and you just open to women?
This is truly sad. Nora died in 2022 from an apparent suicide. It also took her a trip into manhood to realize that men and women are very very different and the divide in the last 5-10 years has become much larger. God bless you Nora.
More women need to do this, I watch this for comedy and laugh
Don't tell that to trans people. I actually started listening more to jordan peterson talk about men in the past year or so than I ever have. I never looked into women though. It's amazing to have a real look into males' minds. I actually have tried to make an effort in telling my father I appreciate all that he does.
“Apparent suicide”?
(She was assisted in a country that assists…)
@@FangerZero Pretending to be something she wasn't was what ultimately tore her up so terribly. What you need to understand is that trans men (born female) and trans women (born male) have to suffer through this the entire time they are hiding their gender identity. As Nora said, gender is in the mind. The chasm that dysphoria creates, especially when you are forced to play the role you were assigned at birth as is what kills trans people.
That, and the discrimination that people like you tack on is what truly hurts them.
Its a great thing that you're trying to learn about others, and educate yourself on psychology, but my admonishment to you is that you need to seek better sources, especially non-politically charged ones. Unfortunately, Jordan Peterson has a political agenda to uphold, at the behest of his "professional" platform. Learn from other people. Learn FROM the people actually going through things, and then you'll have a much better understanding of this world.
You can't expect that by eating meat meat meat and no veggies, that you'll be able to create a balanced diet. Jordan Peterson is NOT a reliable source, unfortunately.
Good luck, and ***NEVER*** invalidate someone's lived experiences, just because some youtube celebrity makes it sound cool. You're better than that.
She didn’t commit suicide, she sanctioned Swiss people to murder her
As a nearly 18 year man from gen z I tell you it's hard to live every day. It's a fight to just get out of bed it's hard to eat especially when you're pushing 260 pounds and you just feel like you weigh too much to eat. It's hard to do every day activities without having a mask on. It's a nightmare thinking about the responsibilities of an adult like getting a job, saving money with what little money you earn and have, getting a house and then getting a wife and kids. I find it hard to love because of everybody that has left and abandoned me. It's also hard to find a lover because to them I'm not attractive enough and I don't have big muscles so I gave up on trying to find love. In the end of a day I feel like my only purpose in life is just to be a mindless zombie in a sea of uncaring people.
Become powerful.
I am 17
And i had the same thoughts
And i still can't stop thinking about it
I'm trying I'm powerful enough not to do it yet
God bless Nora and her work. The differences between men and women arent bad. Social media and law/politics has soiled the perceptions each gender has of the other. Im a woman, I grew up in a man hating family and I've been abused by men, but that never changed my love for them. Frankly I love and am frustrated by both genders equally 😅 people are people
It's been strange, these past 12-or-so years, being a man in a society that claims to value inclusivity and tolerance. We're told, both explicitly and implicitly, that we're the problem and that we're the reason why society *needs* to be more inclusive and tolerant. Because of this, we watch from the sidelines as everyone else binds together, establishes relationships, and finds meaning in their lives all based on an overly simplistic idea about 'male' and 'female'. I remember when MeToo first became a mainstream thing; I have had experiences where women and men have acted inappropriately towards me, often physically, but when I tried to join in I was told in no uncertain terms that the movement wasn't for me, and in some cases I was told that it was a movement against people like me. Men have been stereotyped, our behaviour stigmatised and scrutinised for the tiniest sliver of 'hate', and when our detractors don't find anything they just make something up. Recently there was a campaign in London, UK (where I work) urging people to do something if they see a woman being assaulted or harassed in a public place; meanwhile there has *never* been any campaign to tell people about what to do when it happens to a man. Apparently men are the powerful class, with women as the powerless ones, but that's becoming increasingly less easy to agree with in a society that overly prioritises the latter and demonises the former based on nothing but a speculative theory with little evidence to support it.
The amazing Erin Pizzey fought for abuse centres for women in the UK in the 70s and created her own centre becoming a hero, she then tried to help abused men and found they were half of victims and women half of abusers so women killed her dog in an attempt to kill Erin and drove her from her home and country, to this day no abuse centres for men in the UK, but its about equality like the vote. Wha a joke......
Thanks for sharing your experience. I completely understand how lop-sided it is. And it's not fair at all that you were turned away from Me too!
A good male friend of mine, who I think of a brother, once tearfully told me that as a child his older sister and her friends forced him repeatedly into sexual acts. He was 55 and had never shared this with anyone. I could feel the shame that he had been carrying his whole life.
Other men have told me about their wives being physically abusive.
I completely understand! As a woman everyone would rally to my side if a man abused me. But where can male victims find support?
Yes, things definitely need to be evened out and the picture of victim-perpetrator needs to be viewed outside of gender stereotypes.
Sorry bud, but your problem is your fundamental view on what society is and what your role in it is and how wrong you are about all that.
Time to toughen up. That’s really it. Just say “fuck it” and move on.
Good luck man.
@@Xianne027
I totally agree…
@@eagleithrustx5668 Are you answering me or @thefurturist8864? Because I made it clear that I'm a woman, not a "dude".
Thank you for sharing this. The thing is, as men we don't even really want sympathy. What we want is acknowledgment. We don't mind suffering for those we love, we just don't want to be taken for granted and dismissed, which is what usually happens.
RIP Nora. The world is a darker place without you.
You’re not even asking for much; you’re asking for what should be automatically granted to you as a man…
Truth brother
@@christinemclatchie
Automatically granted as a human.
Unfortunately when a woman shows sympathy to a man’s suffering, it is inevitably stained with disgust.
Truth, I dont mind suffering for those I love. But being rejected, shut down, rarely acknowleged, breaks me.
I'm really, really sad that she took her own life 😢
R.I.P Nora Vincent 🩷
What a wholesome video XD Good on her for doing this out of pure curiosity and genuinely learning something new. I had heard of this for years but never saw the footage. I've literally never been the "woe is me" type for almost any reason but this was great to watch finally.
Just this past weekend I made a trip to see family. Two sisters and myself were sitting up late talking. My sister brought up a subject, I shared one sentence of input and was instantly shut down, yelled at and mocked. Without evening getting to explain anything.
And then for the rest of the weekend I was lectured by one of those sisters that I need to be more patient and understanding.
It's still bothering me.
They are extremely toxic. Don't expect most women to be any different.
🫂s my man. So sorry you had to endure that. Your opinion is valuable, and matters.
They all react this way. They must always be right. Even if they are talking about men's issues.
Classic
Damn i thought i had it bad. My sister is probably 30 or 40 % as toxic so i can relate
I remember watching this documentary like 10 years ago, and it stuck with me. From time to time I'd remember it until I stumbled upon it again here. I once again enjoyed seeing Nora speak truths about what it's like, and the compassion she had for the emotional well being of men. It broke my heart to see at the end that she committed suicide 2 years ago at this point. Nora, where ever you are, I hope the turmoil and heartache you felt through life is at peace. Thank you for taking a few steps in our shoes and being brave.
I bet none of the outspoken feminists of today's world would have enough moral courage to try something like this today
When I came out as a gay woman I was surprised how many gay women talked bad about men. Some were ok with men but many seemed to hate men it made no since to me. Yet some gay men seemed to hate women. They took whatever things they went through in life and blamed all men for it. I never understood this. I watched my big brother cry when he got drafted because he was scared but wasn’t supposed to show it. He was one of the lucky ones. So many women think men get it all but they don’t they have to fight for everything and if a woman accuses a man he is automatically assumed guilty. I watched women get jobs men should of gotten but these women were put there because they were women not because they were qualified
I'm a straight guy, but I did always have my suspicions that most gay men hated women. The actions of some famous gay men like "the guy who bud lite used in advertising" or the "large guy competing in women's swimming " raised my suspicions. They seem to want to mock or destroy women. The average feminine gay man seems to be a mocking caricature of a woman who hangs around with women only to bitch about them
Its very simple to understand and its two forces working simultaneously with eachother. Gay women want to be men but cant , so they are angry at men. also the more angry you become at someone, the more you become like them. So instead of accepting the way God made you, you will always be in this cycle of hatred. Not all gay women but a LOT of them are like this
And just because gay women are becoming more and more like men doesnt mean they will ever be one. They will just keep becoming more of what they hate
🎯
DEI - the beginnings of Didn't Earn It.
Being a man is probably the loneliest thing on the planet.
Out of everyone he knows only three people would listen to his problems and innermost feelings and fears without judging him weak. Those three men are his preacher his doctor and his bartender.
How sad is that?
Nah, they don’t care either, that’s only in movies
If you workout and are in good health, no doctor. Not religious , no preacher. Dont drink alcohol, yup.. My chihuahua is my unconditional best friend, i take care of him amd stay out of jail by any means.
They may not give a damn and probably are judging you, but they will listen.
You can also add dead to your list. Only person I can speak to died many years ago and I still speak to him when I'm alone. It's either that or go mad.
A fourth if he owns a dog
The only time i can cry is when im home alone because im too feared to be seen as weak in front of others.
It shows courage to not fear showing vulnerability to others.❤ (hug)
A lot of what Norah (may she rest in peace) brought to light about what men deal with is extremely eye-opening. I am filled with so much sympathy for men, and I wish it was easier for all of us (men and women) to make them feel more secure and appreciated in our society.
At the same time, some of Norah's experiences living as a man, and then contrasting that with women's experiences, are still more nuanced and complicated than that. Dating, for example. While I can only imagine the stress of being a heterosexual man, expected to strongly approach a woman and risk getting coldly crushed by her rejection as was showcased in the video - on the flip side imagine being expected to wait, to sit nicely by and hope to be pursued. Also hoping that a man who approaches you is a good person and not someone with dark intentions (and yes, women can have dark intentions too). Sure, some might argue that women are allowed to initiate and aren't mandated to sit idly by and wait for a guy. But, depending on the society you live in, your age, and other circumstances, for a woman to initiate is also to risk looking like you're 'easy' and just wanting a fling; or if you get to know the guy better and then decide you're just not compatible, then it's on you that you 'led him on.' Then _you're_ at fault. You're a manipulator and a deceiver, you're a 'Jezebel.' At least, that's been my personal experience...
I think the key takeaway here is that neither men nor women have everything easy. Neither one has it made. We have our own struggles, and we can't fully understand or appreciate what the 'other side' has to deal with. I have seen men being shamed, manipulated, blackmailed, strung along, and financially taken advantage of by truly nasty women. I have also seen women being shamed, blamed, manipulated, gaslit, and physically abused by horrible men. We need to be there for each other, whether that's as a friend, family, spouse/partner, or what have you. We should all use our differences to help balance and support each other, instead of exploiting each other.
We need to normalize platonic friendships between men and women. Rejection doesn't have to be like this either.
It is true, it is difficult in different ways.
I read her book when it was first published. Amazing. As an introvert/loner, I never dated enough to really learn a lot about men. God bless Nora/Ned.
Her book was very good. cheers
That's the #1 privilege women have , the luxury of not having to understand men bc we look for and value your beauty, which your born with. We are not born with that same value, we must earn ours. Only then will you notice us.
Sex for men is not all about a physical urge. It has more to do with being accepted or acceptable. It validates you as a man so without it you feel inadequate and I can’t think of anything more heartbreaking than your primary emotion being that of inadequacy. It’s tough being a man. Our entire existence revolves around being useful and wanted. Thank god for men.
Nora’s description was more accurate ngl..
It’s definitely just a nonnegotiable bodily function.
Wow that one hit close
@@ferretlord3990It is negotiable most of us just don't have the discipline to ignore that urge. It is possible tho you just need enough experience with sex to be able say "I can do it another time"
@@ferretlord3990 It's both.
I agree I don't feel accepted or wanted . It's not about sex as someone said it's about feeling appreciated. It can be difficult when you want to be in the presence of females ( work with 160 males ) but they think all you want is sex .
Very sad how we are not appreciated .
I suffer from trauma and depression but never thought about suicide .
Guys you matter you are worth it no matter what don't give in to your demons or thoughts please we don't want to loose anyone your life is important even thiugh I dint know any of you I care .
Only women and dogs are loved unconditionally. Men are loved for what they provide...
She said sorry for being mean because she got exposed
Norah touched this man's heart. Thank you for trying to understand men and their struggles. You have done a great service. Norah you and I share the same birthday September 20, 1968 and it's makes all the more special for me. I'm sorry you felt so much pain to take your own life. God bless you and Rest in Peace.
My message to women who are struggling to get respect in a male environment is simple: a lot of men don't get respect from their peers either.
It's not always necessarily a gender issue, it's a power issue. And when (I'm being as honest as I can) women say that men are rude to them, and aggressive, don't respect their authority ... guess what? We get that from other men too, and we have to deal with it.
It's often bourne out of frustration, or tiredness, or just not knowing how to respond to stress, but the result is the same, anger, some swearing, and often casual insults thrown in for good measure. It's pretty much constant, and can often get violent. As a senior, male member of staff in a restaurant, I've been physically attacked by chefs more than once (had one guy literally try to climb over "the pass" with a knife in his hand) and nobody ever got disciplined.
Maybe I'm going to be unfair, but if a woman told that story, I could guarantee it would be told from the perspective of gender inequality and misogyny. Which, without the knowledge that it's happening to men too, is an easy mistake to make.
But until you've lived as a man, trying to balance a hormone that is constantly priming you for a defensive/aggressive stance, in a pressurised environment, with senior management who often are completely oblivious to the problems they cause, and yet remain unaccountable, you WILL get conflict between ego, responsibility, standards, hierarchy, working conditions, financial responsibility, the face you have to put on for others, the strength you are expected to show, and the absolute, complete unexceptance that you are allowed to make a mistake.
That's the male world.
All day, every day.
And heaven help you if any of it makes you appear weak.
Nuff said.
Interesting insight. Thank you.
This needs saying and saying often. It's a mistake to treat women the same as men. It's a very naive view of equality. Equal respect, equal rights and equal treatment are not the same things.
@stevecarter8810
So based on gender alone, it is acceptable to treat half the population differently?
That works both ways of course (unless you mean by "treat" you are referring to the way both men and WOMEN treat women...), you can't make a demand for equality with an immediate caveat that equality is different depending on the gender of the person doing the (for want of a better expression) treating, and the subject of the treatment.
Women can and do commit domestic violence against men, and the thing that goes below the radar is the amount of (subtle difference) domestic abuse initiated by women too.
I was in an abusive relationship with my ex. She would grab my phone and read my messages, reading narratives into conversations with friends, treating any female work colleagues as if I was having an affair with them (literally starting arguments in staff events where it got to the point we had to decline to take part in any social event because she would kick off)... and that was just what was publicly visible. In private it was constant "you live under my roof, so you have to abide by my rules..."
Now, that type of abuse is, I don't doubt also used by men against women in toxic relationships too, and as I said in my original post, put gender aside for a moment, this is about power. And it's also about PERCEPTION.
You seem to imply that men are more resilient when it comes to handling what might be bullying, or what also might be excused as "banter", whereas in reality we have to just get on with it, handle it by pushing back or accepting it as a constant background to our working day, and tough it out. You imply that we shouldn't subject women to the same, constant boundary pushing that men are subject to. Why?
Because they are inferior?
Can't handle it?
Sorry you're approaching this from the wrong angle.
This, in an ideal world shouldn't be happening at all.
It's not acceptable to treat men (by men or women) in a derogatory or casually demeaning way, any more than it is to treat women. Just because men are expected to cope with shit, doesn't mean that it's right that they have to, any more than it's right that we should treat women with either disrespect OR moderate our behaviour towards them because we recognise that eg toxic banter is somehow more harmful (and therefore unacceptable) only to women?
Equal treatment isn't about reducing bad attitudes from men to women to a level that "doesn't intimidate or threaten", while leaving those same threats (which women may not be even aware we are experiencing) still going on against other men.
What we must do is treat people as individuals, and respect their comfort zones regardless of gender.
Banter, even casual insults are FINE, if it's understood that it's part of a dialogue where both parties can exchange insults and expletives without offence being taken.
However, if both parties are not engaging as equals, and it turns into a demonstration of "I'm stronger and can humiliate you at will" power politics, or gender bullying, then that is NEVER acceptable.
That goes for working relationships, social gatherings and private/personal/intimidate interaction too.
Saying that you have to treat a section of society differently is implying that disrespect is acceptable to the REST of us, and that view is fundamentally flawed.
@@Anditover I feel like you don't need a reply you just wanted something off your chest
We all have our own struggles. This shows we should be supportive of each other and help each other not yell about who has it worse. It’s sad the world lost her. From what people are saying here she was constantly harassed for this from outside communities and that may have led to her death. It’s sad people harassed her for actually taking the time to learn the struggles others face instead of blaming others or arguing about who has it worse. She was open minded enough to see everyone has their own life struggles and that it’s not a competition. R.I.P. Nora.
Rest in Peace Nora x
you went in for the wrong reasons, but you saw the truth and they crucified you upon return.
The men won't forget though, to be understood but in such a grim way.. RIP Nora
Men have been torn down and bashed for years ...but real men can take it..we know we are needed
the suicide rate says many real men cannot take it.
I get confused. What do men want. I either give too much not enough. I have so much to offer but get passed up its always my girlfriends they are pretty great figures. Hot. So what
Do they want. Please can an an ordinary man want.
To be appreciated every once in awhile, to be needed, food and sex. Not always in that order.
You got that right Bill, keep calm and carry on.
"Being a woman is a privilege", as a woman that really got me 💖 and gave me something deep to think about. Thank you for giving your message to the world, RIP beautiful Nora 🙏💕
Should be put into a massive perspective , a female tried being a man then killed herself . Another day just being a man , my next life I want to be a blonde woman then demand everything an get the perfect life without everything doing anything …yea privilege
Man.
Thats so sad.
As a man that recently lost my beautiful wife of 33 years Ive been at the bottom of the barrel when it comes to feeling down.
The things that make me feel better are exercise and talking to other men who respect me and who Ive been there for when they were down.
I was there for my Brother through his nasty divorce from a cheating wife and he calls me almost every day for mutual moral support.
I also have a good buddy with similar interest of mine and we have been working on projects together.
He is having problems with his wife’s depression so we are good moral support for each other.
Its great to have make friends that can actually empathize with you but some men aren’t capable of talking about such things.
It sometimes takes a woman’s touch to really comfort a man when He’s down.unfortunately you don’t have many choices in that department when you’re suddenly all alone and have to rediscover yourself feeling like half of you is missing.
I think this is why men often find women right away after losing their wife because they really need that companionship and relationship from the feminine species maybe more so than women do for a man.
Psychology has studied that the benefits for a man to be married is greater than a woman in terms of health. Both psychological and physical health and fortitude. Unfortunately men tend to keep their woman priority one lifelong whereas women can tend to downgrade their husband a peg or few down the list as most important in leiu of a good friend or other family caregiver helping with your kids years on into marriage/relationship. Men can't help this but the emotional reprecussions of this recorded pattern is problematic. This is from a lifespan psychology textbook.
If I have anything to say I am sorry deeply sorry for your loss of your wife.
it’s videos like these that make me so glad i always tell my father how much i appreciate him and everything he does for our family
rest in peace Norah
Men try to make sure a woman's life is filled with joy. Women try to make sure their life is filled with joy. I find it odd women are considered more caring.
Both do and do not. It's sad really.
They are more caring towards their children. We men are left on our own. It is what it is
Odd. A lot of women try to help their children be filled with joy. From the man to the woman, usually to the child(ren).
@@kristinajames728 I understand this isn't always the case. Just overwhelmingly the case.
@@lorenzozinna4700 But even that isn't even true. If you for example look at the statistics for kids raised by single parents, the kids raised by single fathers generally turn out alright, while a large majority of the kids raised by single mothers are a mess that have a hard time functioning in society. You'd think that the sex "more caring towards their children" would do a better job in raising them, but statistically, they do not.
I think another part of the problem, I know a lot of women see men as kind of angry, or "sharp". You have to be careful when you say things that should trigger an emotional response. Because we as men, as she stated, have had the "feelings" beaten out of us over our lifetime, so when you put us in a position of having to feel something, it often triggers anger and frustration, because our coping mechanisms wont allow an emotional response, thus causing us to be a little angry at the person trying to force us to feel something, we have walls all be it, Thin walls, we cant just open it a little bit at a time, that thin wall is holding literally every thing about us back, and to even allow a little crack, could be devestating to us, "The flood gates open", no controlling shit after that.
I would like to add. Being a man is being able to do things without emotional reaction. It is demanded by our culture and our duty. We have emotions even if we Don't outwardly express them. We rarely suffer, instead we endure.
What you just described is a woman. Anger , trigger, walls, men carrying these emotions are all found in the same prisons. Bc they could not control their emotions.
@curtis56c: well said.
I'd like to add the fact that when the flood gates opens, men are often mocked by women. I'll never forget this girl who was depressed and kept calling me to cry about her problems. But I was also depressed at the time, and it showed. Until the day she straight up told me (angrily) that I should stop saying this stuff and behave.
I haven't seen or heard about her in years and it feels good.
I can't overstate how highly I do appreciate what she did to understand what it means to be a man and what we have to deal with. I am myself struggling with highly functional depression and it just sucks if I keep hearing how privileged mean are and how much easier we have it in life. Of course being a man has it's advantages but it also has it's hardships and I hate it when these are constantly ignored and downplayed. I am so thankful that she tried to walk a mile in our shoes and I am so sad to hear that she committed suicide.
When a man says “I’m ok…” he’s not ok, but he will keep going because nobody cares.
Not really true I don't think. My guy friends are pretty tight nit. We have to create communities for each other
Good on Nora for getting to know what its like to be a man. Instead of bashing, she sought understanding. Love what you did. ( straight male)
My jaw dropped at the end and I welled up. I wasn't expecting that at all. R.I.P. Nora, a good woman who actually cared enough to find out the truth and express it to the world.
Crazy how life brings these exact messages, precisely at the moment your feeling exactly that! Is it synchronicity, creepy or the illusion of having a free will. In peace you will rest.
This documentary, your point of view and your sacrifice during those 180 days were very important for so many people understand different points view
thank you
I'm just gonna say...
"R I P" to this incredibly brave WOMAN!!!
Wish things would've been different for you.
Offing oneself isn't brave, and suicides don't get to rest in peace. Limbo awaits.
@hyperteleXii l wasn't saying she was brave for committing suicide!
I was talking about her bravery for taking the time to walk in the world as a MAN to see if life was as great for us guys as WOMEN thought!
Also, as her MALE role, she was put through a lot of tough BS that us guys go through on a daily basis.
So she realized that her views on a MAN'S life wasn't easy or better than WOMENS!
After less than the time, she wanted to portray the act of a man... she literally had to quit her pursuit of the truth because it took less time for her to see exactly how the world views us as MEN, and she absolutely could not cope!!!
Later on, her guilt got the best of her, and she couldn't live with the fact that her and other women were 100% incorrect on their views of how we live.
The accountability was too overwhelming for her!
Hence, her death.
Her BRAVERY was in caring enough to go through our world for as long as she did, and formed a strong relationship with her bowling buddies, that accepted her even after finding out that she
was actually a woman!
You either are brave, or you're not. Brave people don't quit. Ergo, she wasn't brave. She might've DONE brave things, but her true character was revealed at the end. Quitter. Not brave. Like, good on her for trying, but she still failed miserably.@@JohnBrown-rh1zc
When women get together they give each other fake compliments
When men get together they give each other fake insults
Man insults are more like "I cut you this deep on your shortcomings just so you know that I know you better than anyone else AND I love you regardless, and you know it, and I know you know".
I love this so much. Thanks for giving me a small amount hope, thank you
She could had so much support from us men if she wanted. Never heard about any man talking bad about her. Infact she probably has an earned a massive respect from men who knows about her.
She is a Saint.
When y'all are all done crying for Norah, see if you can dig up a tear or two to shed for some guy whose name you never heard, who wasn't allowed to be a father to his own children, who was rendered destitute, and who sunk so deeply into the depths of despair that he could see no way out and took his own life - and didn't even get a television network to tell his story.
Or maybe you need to rewatch the video.
I knew of a man that you describe. He too took his own life
Since the start of covid I have personally known 5 men. All age groups. All walks of life. Who got to the point where the only way out was to end it. Life has gone on. More have followed all over the globe. But I often wonder what would would have happened if they were woman. I suspect they would still be here. And if not, this far too common end that becomes of men would be actually addressed.
I was almost the guy you describe. But doctors from 2 different hospitals, with some of God's intervention mixed in, prevented my departure. A few months locked away in a mental institution followed. But it was only a bed, no actual treatment, and I was not there by choice. Getting out, the only thing that had changed was I stopped trying to off myself,. And that was only because I knew God wouldn't let me leave, my attempts to do so only creating more medical issues for me to somehow live with. So that's what I did, learned how to move my broken body, through what remained of my broken life, one day at a time. Now in my 60's I live alone on a mountain. My income never recovered, still below the poverty line, but no longer shared with my Ex. I have been able to start communicating with my kids, having actually even seen their families now. But we are like strangers. Being separated, no contact, for the better part of 40 years has that effect. And living nearly 3,000 miles apart, we can't just hang out on weekends to catch up. So our contact has been more like opening an old wound, so salt could be poured into it. A chance to see what I missed out on being a part of over these long years. While my Ex continues her uninterrupted active part in and with. One final twist of the knife before my time here officially ends.
@@elusiveeskimo3013 wow brother you have been through a lot. Still being here on this rock with us says a lot about your strength of will and character. I'm in my 50s and gone through the world that is divorce with children and found out how expendable, a commodity and replaceable I am. Women say men treat them like objects, but god forbid they ever have to actually live our lives and feel, or not feel, the way we do. Glad to hear you are re-connecting with your kids. I don't think its ever too late. As they age and live their lives they will be more able to empathise and understand. I used to dislike my dad growing up. But into my forties with kids of my own, I could finally see the realities. Not failures but as a father trying his best to do what he thought was right. I have great respect for him now.
It's a sad world we live in indeed that men's struggles are not heard but women's are. Unfortunately, our society gives more power to a woman's voice, however, this is why she chose to take on this journey and share it. She chose to use her privaledge as a woman to spread awareness and try to bridge the gap of communication and understanding between men and women. I don't completely understand the struggles men go through but I do know they need help like every human, male or female. I appreciate the greater understanding of mens' struggles that I have gotten from this video. It won't change anything for men over night, however, people like Norah stepping out of their comfort zone to help herself and others to better understand humanity as a whole are sorely needed.
Thank you Norah, and to all men who are reading this, thank you for all your selfless acts of kindness, all your hard work that goes unrecognized/un-noticed that you constantly do. You are so important, your struggles are valid and you matter more than you know.
My heart goes out to all who struggle in silence, work hard to support their families, and strive to make the world a better place for all humans. Whatever it is you are dealing with just know (you will overcome it) Help is available just ask. If they're not willing to help they're not the right person and not worth your time🙏❤
To all working to better the world and human connection/understanding Cheers!🙏
I swear that's all I ever wanted from society, that it would vocalize and acknowledge that men don't have it better than women and women don't have it better than men; we just have different crap that we have to deal with. Norah said it, but it'll never be uttered by the populace in general, because to acknowledge there are aspects of being a man that are depressing and/or hurtful is to take away from women's experience, or something, probably, idk, that's basically what they say though, if not in words, then by their actions.
As a woman with five brothers and a brain enough to see through the lies of feminism, I am very *strong* in my marriage course for engaged couples in my church in talking about the absolute necessity of men in the family and for the preservation of society. I no longer live in the feminist distortion that is American society but in a Catholic country where men and women relish their differences and complementarity. But the gender-bender agenda is seeping into this culture too, with the myth of the toxic male being part of it. I explain to the women that being a man in this world is tough, and that both supporting them and letting men take the lead in the family is vitally important. The world needs manly men who do what male nature was made to do: to protect and provide. Women need to help men be men by *letting* men protect and provide. When they let men get on with being men, women get to relax into their own feminine genius. Both grow in their beauty and stature as male and female when *first* the men can be men. Because it's only when women are protected and provided for that they can relax, breathe easily, and fulfill their feminine nature - part of which is nurturing and encouraging men. When we stick to our nature (men protecting and providing, women nurturing and creating culture) both the man and the woman are free and safe to fully realize their best selves.
I get it. I'm an old woman raised with four brothers and have two sons and grandsons. Well, I don't get it entirely I'm sure but I never thought they had it any easier than me, just different.
You don’t know how much respect I have for people that will actually put forth the effort to understand. And to do all this?…..thank you
As a man you learn to make a shield to ignore the world and focus on what is important to you!
It was really sad hearing that she's no longer with us. She seemed like a really cool person.
As a man, I acknowledged, in my early adulhood, my incapacity of expressing my feelings to female due to my mom's absence of showing love to me. When my close younger brother identified the matter to me, it made me start watching her behaviour more. My brother then invited me not to wait for her to get a hug but to initiate the contact. She was as cold as ice at first. A few years later, I asked her why she was so distant during my childhood. She said she was afraid I would cling unto her forever. I am 66 y.o. now. She is 89. I am the father of six boys and we hug and verbally express feelings as it should. I have buddies and our bonds are strong. Thanks Ned. I did shed a tear. You were genuine.
I think it doesn’t help boys to be too close to their mothers. Boys need to learn from their fathers to be good men.
I grew-up with my 5 sisters and mother ( my parents divorced when I was 6 ) got lots of attention,affection ( hugs,kisses on the cheek ) my mother and sisters told me they loved me often.I'd act like I didn't like all this affection and attention,but,I did. LOL. And I hugged and told them I loved them too. And still do till this day.
@@totesmagotes3688 I agree to the "too close" part. Dad was not the hugging type either. A lot of discipline (even physical - I was the curious type and often found myself in troubles 😞) but was compensated by his genuine interest in my sport activities. Always encouraging. He was reliable and had much determination. He was kind to mom in words and in deeds (sang to her and danced with her in our company). Today, I hear old songs and I see them dance in the kitchen or living room ! 😄
@@user-be7tc2bd6e
Love it!! 😊
@@totesmagotes3688I am 34 and lost my mother to cancer 14 months ago. We were never close and will never have the chance to be, it’s the most painful feeling I have ever experienced. I think you are incorrect about your statement.
I remember watching when it first came out. O admired this woman for what she did. I am so pained to hear of her short life and how it ended. Thank you for posting.
its not a race who suffers the most, both gender need supports, lets embrace it and start be better for other people
Fantastic ! As a woman myself, her testimony has given me an insight into what I could never have understood by trying to probe my husband. Wow Thank you Nora. This has the potential to help couples to respond instead of reacting to one another. Her experience is an eye opener for women.
She did more to shine light on the plights of men and the dangers of feminism than anyone I’ve ever seen. Truly brave soul that I pray is in the Lord’s embrace.
Well said! Perhaps this should be part of High School or College curriculum!
She was trying to do the opposite, but learned the truth of the Matriarchy, that has existed since 1925
@@kevinsears7300At least she had the honesty to report her actual findings.
@@kevinsears7300we don't have a matriarchy. The indigenous Guarani of South America had a true matriarchy. Women were communal and shared whatever man they wanted. Children were only raised by women and the name and lineage was passed on by the mother. Women raised each other's children together. When the Europeans invaded Paraguay the women chose them as the stronger men and the European founders of Paraguay could have children with as many women as they wanted, but didn't get to raise the majority own children. So to this day the indigenous Guarani language still lives as one of the official languages.
The indigenous men were enslaved by the European men.
If you think about it, it's kind of like a pride of lionesses, the strongest male rules for awhile until he's too old and gets defeated then goes to die alone.
A true matriarchy is when women are no longer competitive with each other and instead share everything, including men.
@@littlepinkdot2916 Im awarevof several tribes like this... However if a society where men have morevlegal rights and priveledges is a Patriarchy, then America has been a Matriarchy since 1925.
Of course, the widespread incest in the communal use of woman and only tracking maternal lineages lead to quite a few long term effects. While the concept that Aids came from monkeys is false, it did originate in Africa. thanks to immunodeficuencies caused by inbreeding, the disease made a leap to humans, most likely through blood contact, survived in the host, and eventually becoming the HIV virus we know. Complex viruses like HIV are far too specialized to jump between species under normal circumstances.
There are great long term dangers to incest and inbreeding... this is why we have laws against it, and why species with low populations in the wild often die off rather than recover, inspite of restoration efforts.
I wrote a comment I considered beautiful about how I've seen this documentary many times over the years and how Nora's journey has helped me understand myself better, only to just now find out at the end of this particular rewatch of this part what finally happened to Nora. I'm devastated. I can't really put it into words, I'm just really sad. I hope you're finally at peace.
Women won't even see this but once in a while we all need to imagine each other as the sometimes happy, sometimes hurt little kids we are deep down. Have empathy.
Men know how to bond with men. The intimacy is supposed to come from the wife. The problem is that very few modern women are wife material.
You would rather kill yourself then be friends with other men
I remember this story from when it originally aired.. thought I'd watch again.... I am heartbroken by the news of her suicide. Please talk to someone!!
Murdered. Utter disgrace
Unbelievable!
"Men, you're not alone"
Wrong, we kinda are
Remember, June is mens mental health awareness month, it gets buried under so many rainbow flags that people forget that mens mental health awareness month even exist.
I was unaware of this. It’s all rainbows and pride and nothing else on tv, print, radio, etc.
I have never heard of this. Guess how many times have I heard of Pride this, minorities that. Men are the biggest forgotten minority.