Shane Koyczan 'Heaven, or Whatever'
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- Опубликовано: 7 дек 2014
- As a kid I was a terrible Catholic... as an adult I'm an okay atheist. I've seen religion do good. I've known people who were able to turn their entire lives around because they found God. That just hasn't been my experience. I think, in this life, we search for what gives us comfort. For some people it's a concept like Heaven, for others it's something different. I make no claims that what I believe is the truth... it's simply what I believe. I'm grateful that I was able to find some small measure of harmony with my granddad despite our conflicting spiritual paths... I guess that's how I've learned to define respect.
www.shanekoyczan.com
Twitter: @koyczan
Track available for purchase in the album, Silence Is A Song I Know All The Words To: shanekoyczan.com/store
Poem available in print for purchase in the graphic novel, Silence Is A Song I Know All The Words To, as well as his latest collection of poetry, A Bruise On Light: hyperurl.co/fp8740
Cast & Crew
Alex Waber
Angela Waber
Andrew Warner
CR Avery
Dexter Ver Der Schyff
Melissa Illing
Pascal Polic
RC Weslowski
Ruth Mason-Paull
Ryan Curtis
Written and recorded by Shane Koyczan, music by Hannah Epperson and Cayne Mckenzie.
Video Produced by Stuart Gillies 
Кино
he could just read a grocery list and I'd cry
yekaterina why is this so true?
ME TOO
same omfg
'xcuse me could you please leave (it's a twenty one pilots thing don't attack me)
Nice profile pic😂
"My heaven would make you laugh, because I get the feeling you didn't get to do that very much" AHHH that messed me up
True. It was said do beautifully. What an emotional line.
"You don't have to believe what I believe, it's enough to be good"
~ Shane Koyczan
If everyone followed this philosophy, there would be no conflict in the world.
Depends on how you, yourself define good.
Youve saved my life more than once. I wanna do what you do when im older. I remember everyone telling me im gonna fail and be nothing u gave me hope love light your truly a blessing.
Just Another I don’t really understand that line . What’s enough to be good ?
Emmajeenie Nozistel Meaning the specifics of what you believe as far as religion goes doesn't matter as much as being a kind, generous, and overall good person do.
this will always be magical to me
It's great to see people visiting this video still.
It's a brilliant poem for sure
There’s something so surreal when you see your favorite silly animator complimenting your favorite spoken poet
i watch this video at least once a month. it hits something deep inside of the soul
I miss his content so much
"You did your best to seal up the cracks in my armour and make my heaven here."
I'm crying.
really gets me too
21 year old guy. I don't have a sob story. I have a mom. A dad. Both in a loving marriage. In the same house. But your relationship with your grandfather, written so beautifully in this poem, it makes me think back on my relationship with mine. When I started wrestling in 6th grade, he showed up to a tournament to watch. Not that he understood the sport, but I was in the event, so he came. I picked up lacrosse in grade 8, a sport he knew less about, and still, come hell or high water, he'd make a trek to the local field and he'd be in the stands shouting my name louder than the parents of the star players'. I think back on the last match he ever watched me wrestle. How he told my parents to have me call him when I got home because he had to get home to help grandma make dinner. He answered the phone with "I'm so proud of you."
In the end, when he was in the hospital, after he told the staff to turn his oxygen off, my dad was asked by his brothers and sisters to go talk to him, trying to get him to change his mind. Again, he responded with "How did [My Name] do in his track meet yesterday?"
I miss him dearly. And this is beautiful. I'm a Christian, and this is beautiful.
The thing about religion is, as you put it, it is something that gives people comfort. I am so happy that I found you and your poetry. I can, without a doubt, say that nothing deemed "artistic" has moved me to tears, until now.
Thank you for being so genuine. I look forward to listening to more.
and I thought that the video was going to be the only thing to make me cry here, great story. ...sorry about your grandfather, je seemed like a great man
your comment was more deep than the video
zZpaceyZz lol thank you
Awh.. That made my day readin that comment. .. I'm a Christian to and what u said.... just touched my hert thxs.
TheRisenSoldier your comment made me tear up
I think that Mr Koyczan could say a string of profanities and still manage to make it utterly insightful.
Isaac Matthew I completely agree
jeez i finally understand why he says "hell is not so bad, they pretty much let you do whatever." at the end. its because he is in hell now that his grandfather passed away.
Oh I took that in a completely different way! I thought it was meant to be a joke in response to his grandpa saying "you can't just do whatever" at the beginning. The irony of would joke would have made his grandpa laugh, as Shane said he wished could have done more often.
+ferrypanda thats what i love about poetry. it can be take. in so many ways and still be correct. awesome
I loved that part
Gosh after today I really needed to rewatch this.
omg....
The last couple lines were just so sad. The emotion in his voice is always just so heartbreaking. It's like I can't breathe.
thats exactly how I am, if i'm wrong, and there is a god... i'll accept hell.
Zack Yoloman
Nah, go to HEAVEN M8.
when he said" hell's not so bad " i lost it! XD
its not his vpoice, Its just a paid voice actor, dont be sad, he is just pretending, it probably took about 100 takes to get that pitch !
mcpartridgeboy it IS his voice. It's the people in the video who are actors
"My heaven is here, it was here"
I was doodling while listening to this, and when he said "Hell's not so bad" I just kind of froze.. Looked up slowly and just.. Hurt.
That ending hit hard.
+CynicalCitrus NekoKitten I think that was supposed to be a joke. But I get it, I don't wish hell on anyone
Mr. Dropkicker I know it was meant to be a joke, it's just. Humor in a situation as sad as that would mess me up, honestly. Kind of chuckling while crying kind of thing.
"You don't have to believe what I believe, it's enough to be good." Amen, Shane.
Yes. I wrote a transcript. FML.
You can't just do whatever, the words stumble out of him like a drunk leaving a bar looking for a fresh new last call. He isn't a man of words but he does his best to offer me advice. He offered, "You can't just do whatever". And I know what you meant. You meant that whatever I choose to do I must not be aimless. I must not simply spin this globe and go wherever I stick my finger because 71% of the time I will end up in the ocean. And if I do end up in the ocean, I can’t just do whatever. I better learn to swim. You can't just do whatever. The conversation came after you asked me about heaven. You told me that you think heaven will be specific to each person, and that each person will have their own version of it. And you asked me what mine would be. I was so scared to tell you, I dont have one. But you nodded your head, as if in suspicion that school had robbed me of a belief and some stories. You said you don't have to believe what I believe it's enough to be good. Be good? I will. But then I think about your heaven. Your heaven would be the same haircut, forever. It would be a stick, a dog and some distance. It would be a lawn that always needs mowing. A six pack of pills in their short bottles and your real teeth back, because your dentures could never master that bottle opening trick that you loved to do. The first time you did it with dentures I had nightmares for a month because I thought your mouth had fallen off. Your heaven would be Austria before the war and heaven before you met grandma. It would be head cheese sandwiches and blood sausages and other deli meats that ensured that you would never have to entertain dinner guests, and I would never be in danger of having my lunch stolen. Your heaven would be a stash of raisins, and problems you could fix with your hands. I remember you tried to fix everything with your hands. I remember the difficult days, I remember the bandages. They looked like tiny blankets as if your knuckles had gone off to bed. Walls that looked like they'd said something that got under your skin and were suddenly made to pay for it. I knew that you were an angry man, fingertips like spent shotgun shells bleeding smoke cocktails of gunpowder and singed plastic. You had what some people would call a temper. But you loved a good joke , even if it was on you. Something that could crack open the walls of your chest and let the wind tickle your heart just enough to let you know it was still there. But you didn't always laugh, you didn't always smile. You did keep a mental ledger of what you liked to call your send flowers list. I remember thinking it was a thank you to those who got you good. But learned the truth after my grandmother added a thin layer of sand to your sandwiches because you refused to make your own lunch for work. You told me about it when you picked me up from school that day. You said "grandma just made the send flowers list" and I asked "because you love her so much?" and you said "because I'm gonna to kill her". Of course you didn't. Your version of kill meant two months before winter, having a seamstress taking each of her coats a few inches so that on the first day she needed one. She fumbled with the sudden tightness and you stood there smiling saying "honey, I'll love you no matter how big you get". She did not laugh. And managed to staple your smile back into a straight face when she told all of your friends at work that she had to move into the spare room because you couldn't keep farting at night. You often asked me if I had a heaven what would it be like, and I told you "for such a small word, 'if' is too big a belief to wrap my head around. I would not bend to the hypothetical, but I wish now I would've, even if it eased your mind in the belief that I could be headed to that 'other place' you believed in. I would tell you now, my heaven is here. It was in the gentle warfare in your relationship with grandma, where volleys were traded back and forth like hockey cards between children who didn't care what the stats meant. My heaven would be someone finally agreeing to trade me their fruit roll up for my tin of sardines. My hell was wondering why. Why would you give me sardines for lunch. My heaven would make you laugh, because I get the feeling you got to do that very much, through my hell. Through the night terrors and bloody noses. Through the eyes blacked, bruised backs, sneak attack napsacks and winter coat hijacks you did the best to seal up the cracks in my armour and made my heaven here. I would've loved to make you laugh more. To make your send flowers list just once. So I offer you know my if, if there is a heaven, mine would have a post office, and I could send letters to yours. The first letter would read "Hells not so bad, they pretty much let you do whatever".
OD bless your soul I was looking for this
Holy shit
thank you.
You are an amazing stranger
I’ve written many of these where I could not find them. He’s just... so fucken amazing. Thank you for writing this one
I'm an atheist but this has made me think about my version of heaven and my recently passed grandma...
I found this after my grandfather passed. He was my best friend and I to am not religious but I thought about the same thing
"my heaven is here" almost teared up...
Well, at least I made it to the end of the video without crying this time.
Brb, crying.
yeah the end did it for me.
I couldn't help myself from crying 😭
I was telling myself that I wouldn't cry the whole video. And the last dang 5 seconds.... Darn it, someone get me a tissue.
vivanesca I couldn't get past the shoes :'(
vivanesca the ending is just a heart stopper
This is about Shanes grampie, before he died he asked shane. Son what is ur heaven but shane cant answer that because he is an atheist. When his grampie died, he then realized that all he wanted to say was. Grampie u are my heaven.
+Era Ibanez ):
Can my religion be Shane Koyczan? I am Koyczanic everyone!
+Buyur Dayım
Hahahahaha!
I fund this idea!
+Buyur Dayım If the flying spaghetti monster got a religion so an he.
me too
Yes!
+Buyur Dayım where can i sign up?
2022, I am still here.
I didn't cry over to this day. Or to trolls.
But just when shane started choking up, and when the dad gave the son his shoes.
I cried a bit
+Scatter Official Look up My Darling Sarah, that one is really sad.
+Scatter Official Instructions For A Bad Day brought me to tears.
A good day. that makes me tear up every time.
yeah, same
+Scatter Official listen to "for instance"
Your voice gives me comfort. If I can adopt a child one day ( It is illegal for gay couples to adopt children in Turkey ) I'll make my baby listen to your voice when they are about to sleep. :)
+Buyur Dayım I hope that becomes possible for you some day soon, friend.
Thank you so much friend :)
i support you and hope everything works out for you in the end
kay the killjoy Thank you so much :)
+Buyur Dayım
Hope you can, I support you my friend, also that's a good idea, this world is tough and maybe showing them shane will give them a undying spark of hope, and some inspiration.
My heaven is being surprised by these kind of videos every day.
"And I told you that for such a small word, 'If' is just too big to wrap my belief around."
Gets me every time. Shane has an amazing way of expressing himself.
This man never ceases to amaze me. Shane Koyczan is the single most inspiring speaker I have come to know. His spoken words are incredible and concepts mind blowing.
this makes me want to cry even tho I'm not sad
Same
@@zlinkplays I already did
It’s been a few years since I’ve come across this mans poetry and even till this day 3-4 years later I still find myself tear up through this
This makes me nostalgic for times I've never experienced
Maura Duffy you mean time spent with your grandfather?
There's a German word for this: Sehnsucht. :)
I know I'm not the only one on the edge of their seat waiting for his next poem... I have to listen to each one so many times, because each time I get a new lesson or story from it. I can't wait for the next, keep doing what you're doing... you're inspiring to more people than you may realize.
Couldn't agree more
He should make Man of the Year for TIMES
Theo, well said!
Oh what a odd thing there is sweat leaking out of my eyes
same XD
Jayna Gago it seems I've caught something in my eyes. IT WAS TEARS
Jayna Gago don't be ashamed to admit you cried, crying isn't being weak, it's when you've been strong for too long
i actually saw that in a thumbnail on a video of Shane's that i haven't watched yet
da Wolfy like I completely agree with you. Crying is an amazing thing to do, it allows you to release feelings
I feel crying is great to do when you need to do it
Jayna Gago it's ok to cry because crying shows that you have feelings and plus I know you really wanted to tell us you were crying XD
you fucking wordsmith making me cry n shit
I follow the words my dad says
" I believe in God but I feel that when the bible was being written people added stuff that only they wanted and messed everything up" I believe that getting to heaven is just being a good person in life and you shall be there when the time comes don't judge other people's religion if it makes them happy let them be happy you don't like having your day ruined now do you? Enjoy life guys it's probably the only one you got
"because i get the feeling you didn't get to do that often" always gets me
The break in his voice when he says hell’s not so bad… 😢
The moment Shane says "hell is not so bad, they let you do whatever" means that since Shane doesn't believe in heaven, him and others believe that he'll end up in hell, but since this is his heaven, he gets to make this one final joke to make his grandfather laugh, and help him feel more rested with where Shane is. I love all of Shane Koyczan's poetry and Speeches
Everytime I watch one of your videos I can't help but tear up at how amazingly you put simple things into something beautiful. I would love to be able to express myself like you do. This one really hit home as learning about Atheism for me was a bit of a rough start because I wasn't given an option, but thankfully my family were very open and accepting. Thanks for another video that I will watch over and over, and cry like a baby.
I listened this on the train trip when I was heading to my home town. When I had to make the painful travel to my brother's funeral. I don't think I've ever cried so hard as I did that day. This poem made me think. Maybe he has his own personal heaven. Where he is whole again. There's endless woods. A treehouse, good beer, our childhood dog and tons of comicbooks. An old videotape player and a small box tv where he can watch tons of old ScoobyDoo films just like we did as kids.
I'll never stop missing him. But he is happy and at peace now.
Shane, you help me so much. My suicidal thoughts aren't so bad when I listen to you. Thank you.
I listen to him anytime I'm feeling broken. It's like his poetry can heal wounds.
The first letter would read " Hells not so bad, they pretty much let you do whatever".
That line gets me every time, his voice sounds like he's about to cry but his tone makes it sound happy and jokingly. I love this so much.
I thought it was a 'Sand Flower's list' which was pretty poetic, but I just realized a 'send flowers list' makes more sense.
In parts this made me think of my grandpa. He was not an angry man but the kindest man I'll ever know.
Seriously this guy needs to be discovered sooner, and needs to be super famous because this man... this man is like a light in the dark world that we call Earth. That's all I have to say.
My heart always skips a beat before I click on one of your videos, as if acknowledging the tear-filled journey to come. It's cathartic. It's beautiful. And always, just always, heart-warming. Your voice, your words, and your stories help make the world a more beautiful place and makes me want to be a better person. Thank you.
i don't think that could've been said better.
It's times like these that I realize that I take my family for granted.
I take them for granted and I would never forgive myself for not showing them how much I love them.
But I'm also scared. I wish I could go back to when I was a kid so I could run into their arms and give them the biggest hug I could give. I wish I wasn't able to predict the strange look I'd get from them if I tried any of that now. I wish that life wasn't so unpredictable so I could have time to gather up the courage to do so.
+littleblueclovers Like you said, life is unpredictable and so would be the reactions of your parents, or family members. And even if you get a strange look, so what?
A strange look is a thousand times better than the regrets you get when they are gone and you missed your chances.
MrScreamingSilence Thanks, your words of wisdom really made me rethink things. :)
littleblueclovers
You're welcome and I'm glad you thought about it. Don't be discouraged by small unpleasantries and take the opportunities. There are a lot of things worth doing, even if they are accompanied by unpleasant side effects. The important thing is that you stand by what you say and do, regardless of what anyone else says, because it's your life and your actions, not someone elses and you should do what you feel is important to you.
Anyhow, have a nice day :D
If only I knew this
+littleblueclovers You have no idea how much I can relate to what you just said.. )':
6 years later and this STILL manages to make me cry.
I love my Grandpa very much♥️
Shane - you are too damn good. You must be taking lyrical steroids . You flex your heart and shake the ground. We tremble in the warmest shadow as you over take the light of the sun.
You have superpowers sir.
Thank you for existing Shane Kyoczan. I am just barely starting to learn how to live, and I'm very far behind. I have so many fucked up, self-created coping mechanisms to exchange. I have gone so far within myself that I couldn't see out to protect myself from the world. It usually would start to happen in large groups. i couldn't hear people talking. I would literally run into people and objects, because I was blocking out everything so well. Between my cognitive behavior therapy and you, I am better than I was. I was bullied for years over religion, my personality, the music I liked, and more. When I was doing my counseling worksheet, I was answering as a response on how I could change my current schema.. I wrote, to remember to this day, and started writing from the end of your poem. They have to be wrong. Why else would we... I think of you, Albert Einstein, Alan Watts, Richard Dawkins, and of course Pink Floyd and Beatles. I am not any particular religion, I was calling myself agnostic, then agnostic atheist and had a bit of a spiritual pseudoscience experience. I've just observed some things, and I think it would not be good to be too closed off from what scientific method cannot prove. I believe in an universal consciousness. Every bit of matter and empty nothing is of importance no matter whether defined as good or evil. We are all connected. Our thoughts have so much weight. It isn't quite like The Secret, money manifesting bologna, but not far off. Your thoughts affect many, and out of that many some will be inspired to help many, and on and on you see. My words are still stuck in my head and like to come out through writing.. I've graduated from blocking thoughts, to forcing myself to do things trembling and sweating that I had always avoided out of fear. I am not sure whether the monster I feed is hate or love though. I feed what you might think is hate by fighting and standing up for anyone who I see being hurt, and to me feeding the hate lets love bloom on the other side. Isn't that activism? I want to help people like us, the freaks. Your words' are being reflected on by so many people. I hope that one day I could find the courage to speak without censoring myself out of fear.
"You are that vast thing that you see far, far off with great telescopes."-Alan Watts
21st of March, 2023. I still come back and listen to Shane monthly
July 7
They should teach your poetry in classes. In my English class we did poems by a woman named carol ann duffy. I hated her poems. Boring and lifeless.
I have never gotten teary over a poem. Probably because most of them suck, but yours are very good.
BitBaseSundae If you think Carol Ann Duffy's poetry is lifeless or boring you've reeeally misunderstood them, or just done them to death through the ripping apart of poems that English teachers do for GCSE. The poems in that anthology (Simon Armitage's too) are some incredible works. Google her poem 'Education for Leisure', which isn't in there any more but was when I was 15/16 and is one of the best they taught.
mushroom1212 Yo, my opinion, man. Our options in school was Duffy... Duffy... and Duffy. Not only reading them was a bore, but even listening to Duffy read them herself was a bore. I just found myself sleeping in class(i didn't care to much for english) which is a shame because if they tough Shane's poetry in class, i'd be on bored.
Dear Shane,
Please never stop doing what you do. Your poems bring me to tears, make me laugh, make me angry, and inspire me. It's an emotional rollercoaster. Because even though your poems may throw my emotions around a lot, the ride is great. And whenever I get off, I get right back in line and wait my turn to ride the rollercoaster again. And again. And again. Please never stop. Your poems mean so much to me. I share them with everyone I know. My favorite is "The Crickets Have Arthritis." I guess it's because i can relate. My dad died of cancer, so it really hits home. And whenever I share it with someone and they say "Jesus Christ, this is so sad, why are you listening to this?!?" I just look at them and say "Are you stupid? Listen again. Really Feel the words. Think about what they really mean. This isn't about sadness, it's about hope." I've heard it about two dozen times and i know every word, but it still brings me to tears every time. That's what your poems mean to me. That's the sort of power your words carry when you arrange them the way that you do. So please never stop. Because if I'm the only person who tells you this, just know that it only means that I'm the only one who spoke up. And that I'm representing thousands of people who would say the same if you asked them. Thank you. For everything. And seriously, please don't stop.
~Nicholas
This is so hypnotic - I could listen to it forever. A friend of mine showed this to me when asking what direction I wanted to take my own poetry in, and this is simply everything I can ever aspire to achieve.
I lost my mom in 2016, and my dad in 2019. I listen to this when I miss them. ❤️
I absolutely love you Shane. We have never met, but I love you. That is the reach of your soul Shane.
Over the past 4 years of my life this man's words have saved me more times than I can count. They left me in tears in the middle of class. Gave me the strength I needed to get through the deaths of my loved ones. Most recently my childhood friend died in a car crash just a few months before graduation. These poems have kept me going. Made me realise that life goes on and grief is a part of living. I could never thank him enough for what he has done for me.
My father passed when I was only 9 years old and I understand that this is about your grandfather but I relate to this so much.
Your,
grandpa died
when you were nine
They said he had lost his mind
You have learned
Way too soon
You should never trust the Pantaloon.
Was that insensitive?
It was my dad but okay
oops
i just found someone who likes shane koyczan & twenty one pilots.
my mom passed when i was eight it was really hard but eventually u start.seeing the possitive
Every now and then I come back... I come back to this. "You don't have to believe what I believe... it's enough to be good. Be good." I think back on my life and I ask myself.... am I a good person. I try to be. But I find myself so lost in all of the opportunities where I could have been better but wasn't. I feel aimless.
I'm just so grateful that you exist. That you are here, and that you have expressed something so honest, and so beautiful. Thank you.
"Hells not so bad they pretty much let you do whatever" got me. I was almost done with this video but here it is. This simply little line. This tiny joke has got me crying. Thanks for the cry I needed it
I come back to this video every few months or so and it has not once failed to make me tear up
From one poet to the next, I am grateful for the talent that you possess and share with the world. Bravo, sir.
I took some time to go through some of your videos and you seem like a man of many talents! At the very least, you've certainly given me my motivation to hit the gym hard after finals week.
Why thank you! Best of luck on your finals!
I lost my grandmother around this time last year.. we were close, but her cancer caused her so much pain and she was ready for it. I have been missing her a lot lately. Occasionally taking out the few things I have to remember her by.
She was a godly woman and one of the kindest people I have ever know, and I have no faith. She always told me to be good, and that she prayed for me every day before she went to sleep.
I just stumbled on to this by chance and had to stop half way through because I couldn't even pay attention with how hard the tears hit me. This didn't just bring a tear to my eye... I sat here and sobbed like a child until I couldn't breathe and my eyes hurt.
This is a piece of true art.. and one of the most beautiful and intimate things I have heard in a long time.
Please don't ever stop writing.
P.s. I flew home from collage to sit with her in the hospice room, and the last thing she said to me before they had to medicate her to the point of confusion was this. "I love you all so much, and I cant wait to see you when you get up there with me."
33 more people fucked with the bees.
+Christian Smoot LMAO!!!!! THIS IS PERFECT!!!
you are now my bff
54...seriously, if ya don't fuck with em they won;t fuck with you...
Im terrified of bees xD
Christian Smoot 80 people fucked with bees
Anyone reading this, I wish to share a story about why timing matters.
I found these videos about 6 years ago, fresh out of school. My old man was in the military for over 20 years, and he was even deployed in Iraq while I was in middle school.
We lived on an old gravel road, where you could hear a car coming from a mile away if they drive any faster than 2 miles per hour. For a time, my bedroom overlooked a window to the driveway, and I could see my old man coming 2 minutes before he reached the door. Every other day since I picked up on this, I would run downstairs and announce "Dad's home, guys!" The dogs followed me, wagging their tails and I'd be right by the door to help him if he needed it. "Hey, dad, how was your day?"
Every day. And his response was as predictable as the noise of his truck and the excitement of the dogs.
"It sucked. Yours?"
...I never knew what to say. Nothing I experience would ever match the boredom or exhaustion he faced at work. So I hung my head, called it good, and went back to whatever I would have been doing.
It wasn't until my 21st birthday that I realized he wasn't a man of emotions. He had always joked about kicking us out at 18 years old. We didnt go out to movies.
He didn't take into consideration how the world changed since his youth. Cars and jobs dont come cheap as they used to. But he always told me how important it was to get both. We lived 15 minutes from town by car and told me never to walk down the highway. That conversation came when I picked up a few dollars from my allowance and asked if anyone wanted a soda. "Your mom's got the car, where are you gonna get one?"
"Well, the gas station's not far from here."
"You're not walking down there. It's dangerous."
Whether he knew it or not he instilled fears that would last until my twenties. He divorced our mom around my 20th because in his words "He was done taking care of us". He wasnt necessarily cruel. Misguided and disillusioned, maybe. But he turned his back on us just before life got hardest. For brief moments, I wondered how he would have handled this little slice of history we've been through. For a few seconds every month, I wonder how he's doing. Sometimes I want to talk with him about what went right and what went wrong.
This video didn't make me cry six years ago. After these events and others, this story has a significant amount of weight to it. If I can share any advice today? Look back through some old favorites. Play albums you need to blow the dust off of. Next movie or game you pick up, listen to what characters tell you. It may not be what your past or present self expected, but there's someone somewhere who wrote a message for you in their stories. If nothing speaks to you, write a note for future you. They might appreciate it.
Wow, that's something. I can't quite tell you why, but I'm moved. I hope you're doing well :)
@@beefstroganoff1774
I appreciate that this reached someone. Each step is getting a little easier, and I'm in a good place with my life now.
Thanks for hearing me out. Take care of yourself over there.
My heaven is a December day in 1985 in my grandma's kitchen. Mom is happy, everyone I love is alive and well. Grandma is cooking one of those amazing family meals she was famous for. I'm in the living room watching music videos on MTV while playing with Legos, or GI Joe, and eating those sweet candy canes that grandma never let run out. Mom is young, alive, and so beautiful. She's my hero. My greatest worry is making passing grades on my school report card. I have a backpack full of Garbage Pail Kids, and a love for Phil Collins music. I can still smell grandma's homemade tortillas if I close my eyes.
Times a thief isn’t it...
@@titanforce1808 It sure is.
this gets me crying every time...
Every. Single. Time.
yeppy :'(
You are a true inspiration to me, even though I get teased that I'm a 14 year old who watches you, but you save me. Over and over and over, and I am so grateful
I only just balled my eyes out. This was so moving Shane.
Update: It's two years later and when I stumble upon this video, it still has the same effect. I will never get over how well this was written, it is my favorite poem to date.
i still cry with every second because i think of my dad and how he was a sad man but was always so nice and i just think of how i miss him i will never forget this words
Ohh my goddd *wipes tears as mother walks by*
Really great job Shane!!! I struggle with a situation similar to this, but my parent's hate that I don't believe in what they believe.
Just remember, we all have our individual right to believe in something in which brings us joy, love and comfort.
As long as we do good, bring joy and do not do harm to the ones we love and to ourselves. Then, we have reached our "heaven".
All of us will realize at one point in our lives that what we individually believe in simply has one core to it that we all seek and have in common.
Love. Happiness. Joy. Helping. Understanding.
*****
You seriously could have stopped many wars with that comment. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!?! thanks
failingtobeoriginal Well, everything can come to an easy with understanding and acceptance. Also, being chill you know.
Finally someone that gets me :)
failingtobeoriginal
It's too late war has begun. :p It's just sad man.
There are NO breaks on the feel train.
To all parents and guardians that raised us,
We know you aren't perfect. We know you have your flaws. We know you could have been better.
We know that your judgement in many cases was wrong.
But, we understand. You did the best you could do with us. And we really do thank you for that.
We don't know If we will be able to make you proud or anything.
All we want is that you smile, whenever you see us, just like you smiled when you saw us the first time.
Although, sometimes we make it feel like we really hate you, but we don't.
Just like you love us unconditionally, we love you too,
And we will always do.
Because we will always be..
Your children.
Lost my grandfather last year, I played this at the service. Not a dry eye including mine. I love this so much. Thank you for this
his voice is so calming wtf
This is the most beautiful piece of art i have ever come across
There aren't enough words in the English vocabulary to describe the creativity and amazingness of what you write and say. I absolutely love every piece. I hope that I, someday, get to meet you in person.
My grandpa had a stoke wich severly damaged is jaw and tounge... that was one day before I was born. I have never heard a word out of his mouth other than slurs of what sounds like a broken language. Those are the only memeories I have of him. I imagine him being really nice, smart, funny, helpful, etc. Something that you would think a wise old man to be. But now I know he can't move from his medical bed, breathing through tubes, and having his heart pumped for him. I wish I was able to talk to him. But thats long gone. I am only thirteen years old, on heavy anti-depressants and pain medicine for the hole that was my heart. But beng adopted twice and abonded on a street to wake up in an orphangege and now in a broken house with drugs, alchohol, cigarettes, and nothing but being yelled at doesn't help. I have been to many different middle schools, said the same speech but a lot more drawn out and in detail. Thank you Shane Koyczan for stoppong multiple suicidal attempts.
I am curently getting as much mental health therapy as my family can afford. Only knowing that I will die eventually pisses me off. But screw it. It is inevitable that we will die. Stay positive and stay healthy.
Andrew Bauer I hope you're doing OK today.
Andrew Bauer I feel for you man and I'm glad Shane's voice helps
Shane, You have a great connection to your voice and heart. It is a beautiful thing. I wish you happiness and just rewards. Have faith. Apply to TED talks for a gig or two
Good video.
He has done both a TED talks and a TEDxYouth.
im gonna say what your all thinking!!
SHANE KOYCZAN is an INSPIRATION!!!!!!
Julia Wallis exactly
I lost someone in my family last year, Ive put of watching this video again since now, wish me luck.
I come back to this a lot because I feel like my heaven got lost somewhere in Kentucky. Now I’ve grown up and the closest I can get it this poem,
wow. I'm just in awe of your crafting of words and the beautiful visuals on this
One of my grandpas I never meet he died to young and my other one passed when I was a young child and I have faint memories of him, but sadly cancer took both of them from me just like it did my brother. In my heaven it would be me able to meet them all for the first time again.
I see my father whenever I watch this. He, unlike my mother, took care of me.
Oh my what a trip he took me on. I am still smiling my tears away as I type this. Simply wonderful.
THANK YOU.
This made me cry. His words are beautiful.
This one makes me cry every time
I've always loved this thing for at least the last 3 or 5 years but my grandfather just passed 4 days ago so I'd get a whole of meaning from this..
I remember first hearing this as a 16 year old.
Now I’m 24, broken and lost…and Shane’s poems have gotten me through some dark times.
“…it’s enough to be good. Be good.”
“…I will.”
I can relate. These poems mean something totally different to me now at 23 vs when I was 15.
This breaks my heart in so many ways.
Dont you just love how 90% of the comments are christians pushing their beliefs on Shane, EVEN THOUGH he clearly states in the description that he doesnt believe in god?
You just end made me check over this videos comment section twice, and haven't seen any such case great freakin bait m8!
I was just gonna say the same thing. I haven't seen even one such comment of anyone doing that
For the first time, this made me cry. Thinking of my grandparents in there heaven, I can see them dancing, my grandmother thin and young wearing a beautiful dress and jewelry; my grandfather still with his white hair and same haircut but young again, it would be hot feeling like a sauna. I hope there's a train I can take to their heaven
This has honestly helped me so much. In 2015, my grandfather passed away at our home and it was one of the most devistating events in my life. My grandpa, like yours, raised me and kept me away from the abuse endured by my father. My grandpa was my dad if I'm concerned and he deserved so much for all the love and time he gave to kids who weren't his own. He raised me and my brother. It was so hard losing him, watching him sufficate and not being able to help him. (He was very ill, on hospice, and was already on oxygen. It was just unfortunately his time.) I lost so much of myself, and then I found this video. And it's helped me heal so much. 💝
Every single time I watch this I'm so impressed with everything. I love this so much
Listening to Shane's poetry always makes me want to hone my skills to write better. I was never able to write spoken work poetry well, but I'm trying:/
The if is too big to wrap my belief around is so relatable. This had me crying like a baby. Just full weeping. Not even because I'm grieving or anything, just the beauty and emotion and everything
My friend sent me this video. I was listening to this on my way to university today! I've been so stressed out with finding out that I have cancer and also being stressed out in university. Finding out the bad news made me realise how great my friends and family are. This video made me cry, I cried because it made me happy. It inspired me, it made me realise that for me this is my heaven. And I'm greatful for everything and everyone!
Broke down when his shoes were stolen and his grandpa gave him his
Same Darian MacDonald
I really like this video. There's no "my way is the right way, and your are stupid for having beliefs" you have respect. you don't look down upon people for their choices. you are honest. you don't think of yourself as the superior, you don't think that spiritual people have blinders on to the real world. your is a ~believe in what makes you happy. believe in what makes you a better person~ and i think that makes you a very good person
Shane, I dunno if you will ever read this, your videos get a lot of traffic so I dont think so, but I need to tell you a story about how you have impacted my life so greatly. My story is opposite of yours, I was born into a Muslim family and became an atheist very early on in my life. 3 years ago, I became a Catholic, finding peace and truth in it. I am not here to tell you that you are wrong for not believing in God, you have one of the kindest and most beautiful souls I have seen in a human being. You are a better Christian than most Christians, and that's all anyone can ask, is that you be a good decent person.
Back on track, The past two years of my life have been a struggle with drug addiction and mental illness. A girl I used to live with showed me your "To this day". At the time, I disregarded it. A couple months ago, when I had basically hit rock bottom, I listened to it again. I listened to it over and over and over, it held me together, it reminded me that even through the abuse and shit I have dealt with growing up, I am still here fighting, and helping all those that have suffered the same way I have.
You also opened my eyes to the world of slam poetry, and its changed my life totally. I have fallen in love with it. I am writing all the time, and about to start performing soon. I notice that you are also canadian, and have performed at events around and near my city. I hope to meet you someday Shane. Keep doing what you are doing!
"Something that would crack open the walls of your chest and let the wind tickle your heart, just enough to let you know it was still there." ❤❤