How To Stop Hair Pulling and Skin Picking! The ComB Model! (Part 2)
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- ✅ Treat at home - BFRB's (hair pulling, skin picking, nail-biting) (try for free) ➡️ ► www.ocd-anxiet...
❤️ Take the BFRB Tests ➡️ www.ocd-anxiet...
➼ Do I have hair pulling disorder?
➼ Do I have skin picking disorder?
If you haven't watched part 1 make sure you do that:
VIDEO: • How To Stop Hair Pulli...
I go through the second part in using the ComB model for BFRBs or the Comprehensive Behavioral Model. This is a researched based treatment that works well for someone struggling with a BFRB.
This can help someone stop the following:
Trichotillomania (hair pulling)
Dermatillomania (skin picking)
Excoriation Disorder
Nail Biting
Lip Biting
Nose Picking
VIDEO PLAYLISTS:
👉OCD - tinyurl.com/OC...
👉Depression - tinyurl.com/de...
👉Scrupulosity - tinyurl.com/sc...
👉Harm OCD - tinyurl.com/ha...
👉POCD - tinyurl.com/po...
👉Sexual Orientation OCD (HOCD) - tinyurl.com/ho...
👉Relationship OCD (ROCD) - tinyurl.com/ro...
👉Real Event OCD - tinyurl.com/re...
👉Existential OCD - tinyurl.com/ex...
👉Symmetry OCD - tinyurl.com/sy...
👉Touettic OCD - tinyurl.com/to...
👉Superstitious OCD - tinyurl.com/su...
👉Contamination OCD - tinyurl.com/co...
👉Just Right OCD - tinyurl.com/ju...
👉SOCD - tinyurl.com/so...
👉Sensorimotor OCD - tinyurl.com/se...
👉Social Anxiety - tinyurl.com/so...
👉Anxiety - tinyurl.com/an...
👉Magical Thinking OCD - tinyurl.com/ma...
👉Responsibility OCD - tinyurl.com/re...
👉Tics and Tourette's - tinyurl.com/ti...
👉Postpartum OCD - tinyurl.com/po...
👉BFRB (hair pulling/skin picking) - tinyurl.com/bf...
👉Body Dysmorphic Disorder - tinyurl.com/bd...
👉Panic Disorder - tinyurl.com/pa...
#OCD #BFRB #hairpulling #skinpicking #trichotillomania
Connect on social:
🤚Instagram - / ocdandanxietyonline
🖖Facebook - / ocdandanxietyonline
🤙Twitter - / ocdandanxiety1
I cannot believe you don’t have more likes. This is literally weeks of therapy summed up into two easy to swallow videos. Just 30 minutes and I actually feel like I have the tools to stop. You should be super proud of the difference you’re creating in people’s lives. ❤️ thank you
Thanks so much for the kind words! I believe this has a lot of value. I'm glad you see it. I'm glad this has helped you! 😃
I agree. I've watched just part one and feel like I don't need to waste money trying to find therapists in my area specifically for bfrbs. I wrote down my scamp as i watched it and has already opened my eyes 👀
Coz only 5-10% population sufer from that. Its not entertainment
So true! I’ve been going to a therapist for a few months now working on overcoming this (I’ve been suffering from trich for almost 5 years now 😭) but it’s starting to get too expensive for me to keep going unfortunately. I’m so glad I found this channel and I really feel like he’s giving me the tools I need to finally stop!
@@sophieisabella I honestly believe this as well as Dr. Tracy Courtney is a good substitute for therapy. Check out some workbooks too! I’ve got one for bpd that really helps.
I spent 2 years in therapy to learn the contents in these 2 videos..
Ha! I really tried to jam pack it all in! 😃
Many sessions of therapy and to my amazement, these his videos have truly tackled my OCD with hair.
I really appreciate that you are kind and you're not pushy and mean with your advice thank you
Thanks for the kind words! This keeps me motivated to make more videos! 😃
A mantra I use (and write on my mirror) to be more aware: LOOK but don't touch, TOUCH but don't feel, FEEL but don't pick.
I haven't considered practicing outside of when the urge naturally occurs, thanks for the tip! Excited to have something to work on that isn't just setting up Blockers. Those can only do so much sometimes. Gonna try "graduating" each step of my mantra, starting with the automatic movement of leaning into the mirror.
Dermatillomania has really ruined my life at times. I used to feel particularly triggered to pick when it’s wintertime and my feet get slightly more dry/rough. I feel so self conscious about my dry cracked feet and I feel stress from outside factors in my life and I pick and pull off that skin. It’s difficult because I go through periods of picking and times that I don’t, sometimes it’s so bad that the soles of my feet bleed. I’ve gotten a little too good at hiding the pain and walking in a way that no one notices I’m in pain. But I’ve learned some mechanisms to help. Wearing nice soft socks, exfoliating and moisturizing my feet in the winter, wearing house slippers instead of flip flops inside my house so I can leave socks on, and giving myself a pedicure and painting my toenails, all make me think twice about the picking and help me resist most of the time.
We’re not avoiding anymore. Love this
For being trich-free since march on my journey recovery, you're the first person I see that said out loud what I was thinking this whole time ! Thank you for spreading the real infos on trichotillomania !
I bought a little elastic bracelet that I started wearing and anytime I notice myself picking my scalp I stop and snap it on my wrist just to make myself aware that I’m doing it and I need to stop. And having the bracelet on in general just reminds me to stop because that’s why I have it on in the first place.
Thanks for sharing. You may not need to snap it. But having it on and just playing with it tends to be a good competing response!
I will definitely try this. It will help me STOP the behavior. Thank you
Today I found you and before, I decided for the first time to get a fidget toy. Knowing nothing about how to manage my pulling or why I do it, I started to think, "What am I trying to sooth? What's underneath and hiding? I have defined a reason, maybe. So today, when I had my fake hair in my hand, I focused on what I was doing and how it felt. It felt good. And I focused on the opposite of what I think I'm trying to sooth. Then later, even though I'm doing an activity that I do when I pull, I have no urge to.
I will definitely apply what you've said in PT1 and PT2.
And it's "boredom" that I feel when I pull, and "anxiety". And I think I have an anxiety and feeling that a certain part of my life is out of my control. Although, thats not true. I'm only allowing that. Compassionately speaking, Im allowing it, but more importantly , I think there are always reasons for what we do. In my case, Im a trauma survivor.
Could trauma be a reason behind my pulling?
Thankyou. Youre delightful to hear.
Your treatment has EMPOWERED me to know I can choose a different behavior. I intuitively use “tapping” especially on my pulling arm. It’s working, and I’m feeling more in control. I’m feeling good about myself! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Your work is Exceptional and a Blessing to me!❤
thank you so much. i’ve been struggling with trich for about 9 years and i always thought that seeking treatment would be so daunting and impossible to achieve. just hearing you talk about it so simply and supportively made me feel more confident that i can fight against it
I had a few scars that have stayed with me for almost a decade. Found this on Reddit, thank you for this encouraging video and helpful tips! ❤
Thanks so much for your videos. I’ve scoured the internet and RUclips and you’re the only on that provides me with hope. I’ll be watching them whenever I have the urge (alllll the time) and apply your suggestions.
Thanks Tracy! If you need even extra help I have my online course that does into more detail. www.BFRBOnline.com. 💜
This is hands down the best video I've come across about dermatillomania.
With scalp picking, the thing that I like is that satisfying feeling - I wouldn’t call it pain but that’s the closest word to it. It’s like a relieving pain that satisfies an itch. I don’t know how to replace that feeling. I don’t think I can find a healthy alternative to that feeling. I like putting hand sanitizer on the raw picked skin because of the sting. I have a low pain tolerance for anything not to do with my scalp but for some reason, that sting doesn’t feel like pain to me. I want to be able to stop but idk how to replace that behaviour 😔
Please try gulsha ultimate rose water it will help you I swear I have the same problem it's so much better with this give it a try please
I have had this disorder since I was a kid. The more anxious and stressed I get, the more I pick. Recently with extreme stress I get this urge in my arms almost like restless legs where I just want to scratch them. Like I need a release. And then I go into a panic attack thinking I want to hurt myself when I know that’s the last thing I want to do. I understand coping with stress will help these urges and I’m going to try these exercises the next time I feel the urge. Thank you so much.
This is great... lots of information to follow-up on.... thank you so much!!!
Very helpful video. Thank you for doing this. But as a compulsive puller for 12 years, I really find it too tiring to fight everytime I have the urge. The whole questioning, fighting, changing needs a lot of energy and motivation. Which I dont feel anymore. I have forgotten what I used to look like 13 years ago, with full eyelashes.
Thank you so much, your video was very profound and helpful. I can see that you a way with people and a passion for helping them.
Thank you so much!
You gave me Hope today, thank you soooooo much‼️‼️
I feel better tbh now seeing the comments I’m sad by how much worse others situations have gotten I’m grateful my situation is not that far and I hope I can stop
Thank you so much, it was very helpful for me and I am so happy that I found your video. I really searched for it will no hope to found anything, as I thought it is not a common behaviour.
Glad it helped! Check out the online program as well. 😃 www.BFRBOnline.com
I’ve been picking since I was a teenager I hate rough feeling like it feeling smooth. I hate the feeling a scab is on my face I’m fine with scabs elsewhere if I had one. I mainly feel for coarse hairs on my chin and have to pluck them but then feel rough areas then go to town and I bite and pick my lips too. I used to bite my nails but I put sns on now so I don’t. I know I mainly do it in the car but I have done it anywhere and everywhere. I also have a bad habit of nose. Can’t believe I just admitted that one. I only do when alone I hate feeling of dried snot and need it gone. Not sure how to stop that habit. Def going to try and be more conscious about it. Good luck everyone with your bad habit hope you can overcome it. I’m 49 so mine I’ve been doing over 35 years.
You’re the best thank you so much for this video akin picking has been ruining my life lately
just...thank you. thank you so much.
When I was young I think I am the only person on earth suffering from this kind of disorder I starting hate my self
Thank you so much for these helpful videos!
Saw this behavior in an adult when I was 7 or 8yo.
She would pick her fingers and get hang-nails, constantly.
Also saw a sibling start doing things and I started doing it too but that's when I began living my own life and deviated from them.
I haven't done it since and while I have had hang-nails occasionally (like once every 5 years) I was able to identify behavior that didn't suit me and how some people can automatically fall into the cycle.
Not saying I'm free of any vices, I certanily have them. I spend too much, get caught up in a new hobby way too much and then lose interest, love sugar, yet poverty keeps those at a minimum for me...
Wow thank you so much for this!!!
I typically have issues with skin biting, I crave the chewing sensation- Would chewing gum for lip/skin biting be a competing response? Also thank you so much for the video on this topic :)
When I pull my hair it’s usually before o sleep and I kinda do it semiconsciously I know I’m pulling but I keep pulling bc I feel like one more hair makes no difference, but then after I pull and throw all the hair away I feel so bad and regret it 😢😢😢😢it happens everyday and I’m losing hope
So motivating,thank you🌸🌈🌈
I have an ems machine would that be good to stop me from picking my hair??😅😅
Hi, does anyone out there know if trichotillomania would show up in a biopsy as inflammation around the follicles on the scalp? I would think so but I'm not sure
I have a question when I see myself getting better my problem is I keep going back to it I keep giving myself setbacks why ? Why can’t I just go forward
This is part of the whole process! 😃We learn from the downfalls. The more we can take them and not make a big deal of it the better. I say, "if it happens, it happens." -- no shame or guilt. We try to just learn from it. 😃
Is the answer because I’m not being consistent?
@@daniellejohnson8778 Each person is different. I find that most have to figure out what percentage they actually want to stop. It's pretty rare it's 100%. It may be 70% wanting to stop and the other 30% not. --- Practice helps and almost treating treatment as your part time job can help.
I try not too, and today, I joined a support group but my mom is unrealistic she thinks I should deal with this alone but I’m clearly not successful
OCD and Anxiety oh I get it, it’s how much you want to stop it than you go forward that makes sense and you said it takes practice to be that 70%
Thank you!!!!
thank u so much..
JUST LISTEN GUYS,
WE ARE THE
"BOSS" 😎
WE CAN DO IT AND HAVE THAT BEAUTIFUL HAIRS AND SKIN WE DESERVE
WE R THE "BOSS" 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎
YUH 🥶🔥😈🥶🔥😈🥶🔥😈🥶🔥😈🥶🔥😈
Yes We can do it 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🙏🏾🙏🏾
I always thought that people who are not suffering of this would never understand.... But look how intelligent and supportive he is... I just love every single thing he said ❤️
The amazing approach is powerful, with lots of examples.... HE IS THE BEST!!!
Army 😤💜
Thank you so much, something has clicked about "being the boss" and choosing to use blockers rather than thinking "I need these blockers because I can't trust myself". I have the power now :)
YES YES YES! Way to go! Makes me happy to hear these kind of things! You're awesome! 😃
Great Job Jess!
A simple thing like a bandaid on the finger. Thank you for the idea
@@patriciasangster4808 watch out for cutting off circulation
Very informative, I will be the boss . And take control of my hair pulling . 43 years is a long time for a destructive compulsion. I am partially bald , lost confidence in my appearance . Enough is enough. You are the only person that has made sense to me. I will listen to you on a frequent basis til I kick this habit . I am the boss , not my subconscious. Thank you .
Thanks so much for the kind words! I hope you can find some relief in this process! 😃
Hope you are doing well ✨
It's work in progress, I've struggled this week and pulled a lot out. For no reason. Unless full moon is playing with my emotions. I am sad I am losing so much hair..I've even started hitting my head very hard when I realise I'm doing it. Ive took up dress making again to keep my hands busy . Thank you for yr support ☺️
@@manontisserand3577 x
I'm cheering for you, Lesley! I hope that you are doing well.
Thank you so much. These vids helped me to be more aware of what I’m actually doing instead of feeling down and hating myself❤️
Amazing! What a great shift in perspective.
I have been suffering from skin picking the last seven years and I have always felt such shame and guilt about it. I cried so much during this. I'm gonna try this method for real, and I really want to work on my feelings towards my behaviour. I loved what you said about no picking = success. This is going to help so much! Thank you!
I usually pick when I’m bored or when I’m procrastinating, I find it extremely satisfying . Im mostly aware . I keep internally screaming at myself to stop while doing it. I pick when I’m alone on the couch or when I’m in the bathroom. I don’t pick when I’m wearing long sleeves and pants .. don’t really think about it but as mentioned in the vid I don’t want to avoid it . I want to be able to wear summer clothes and be unfazed by my skin
Hi Nathan. I am here to give you a huge “thank you”. I suffer from this condition since I was 15 yo, when I had chickenpox. I’m from a poor family and the bullying I suffered was the trigger for this behavior (which I didn’t even know it was a condition until some months ago). Today I am 27, managed to have good education, and have a nice job. This has always bothered me and I could not even begin to explain people how it is automatic and I just “couldn’t stop”. Your approach is finally making me feel it is not only possible, but that I can do it. I am already having a nice progress and now I’m in therapy as well. Thank you so much for spreading information. Thank you for doing it in such a gentle way. I didn’t know it was possible. Now I am almost there.Thank you.
It recently clicked with me that my bad habit is truly serious and I can’t just will myself to stop. It took all the stress I got from COVID to realize that my behavior is damaging my hair/scalp (I do both pulling hair and scratching scabs on my scalp). I just noticed that the left side of my hair is significantly shorter and more damaged (more spilt ends, my focus) than my right side. I’m trying to work up the courage to visit a counselor and/or therapist. I just watched two of your videos and I already looked up a specialist therapist near by. I can’t wait to learn more about how to successfully cope with this and my anxiety.
Gold luck!
💕💕💕💕
Hi.. Did u met a therapist? Did u cope with this stressful disease?pls tell me. I am much worried about, exactly same situation like u. What therapist suggest?
@@sumairakanwal9088 Hello! Yes, I go to a counselor every few weeks. (My counselor shares my faith but is still trained). We re talking about why I’m anxious and what I can do instead of messing with my hair. I still struggle but I have tools to help when I’m anxious and picking now. I’d highly recommend finding a therapist or a counselor. I like to use a fidget cube, count beads on bracelets, and wearing hats/headbands/scarves. I hope you find this helpful 💙
20 years of BRFB and thoses videos have teach me more about my trichotillomania in 20 min than 3 therapists and 5 years of therapy. I was begging for pratical tools to help me, the only pratical advise I received was to shave my head. For the first time I feel understood and I feel like i'm receiving actual help. thank you so so much
I like these videos. As someone who's had Dermatillomania for years, I have yet to find therapy to combat it yet, but these videos are nice and informative. Keep them coming!
Yeah! That makes me happy! Thanks so much for your continued support! It means a lot! I hope you're doing well! 😃
🚨Step-By-Step Program to learn how to stop hair pulling, skin picking, & nail biting. (try for free) 👉 BFRBOnline.com
This is so spot on, thank you for putting into words what has been difficult to explain to family/ friends when they see me pulling my hair. An ex triggered this compulsive disorder for me three years ago and I honestly felt hopeless wondering if I could ever go back to normal. This video gives me a lot of hope, and I hope so to for others watching.
You are so welcome!
I’ve been so anxious this week and I’ve been trying not to pull and I just couldn’t help myself and it feels like such a disappointment since I thought I’ve been doing better. I’m glad I found your videos, hopefully I can get better
When I was a kid I used to bite my nails a lot and my mom would always get mad at me because of that. I tried to stop it with the limited knowledge I had and I made it worse: I started biting the back of my pens and pencils, so I went back to my nails.
When I turned 13 or 14, I started getting a lot of cheap nail polish and took my sweet time to make designs I was proud of, and that stopped it for a long time because I didn't want to ruin the art I took so long to create. My mom talked to the principal to allow me to have the nails painted so I would stop that nasty habit. Nowadays, I rarely paint them but I don't bite them anymore.
The thing is that as an adult I became aware that I started biting my lips and the inner cheeks on behalf of my nails, and I would only notice it when I was bleeding and/or it hurt. Working with my therapist, I noticed that I only do it when I'm stressed and/or anxious, and she told me that in order to prevent it, I needed to keep my teeth busy with something else, so she recommended I chew gum instead, and even if years passed, I still don't manage the change of habit yet...
Right now as I'm writing this (I'm 25) I'm chewing gum but my lip is swollen and just stopped bleeding because I didn't have gum at hand at the right time ;-;
Thank you for this! I am trying really hard to give up skin picking...it’s been about 10 years. I’ve recently managed to stop cheek biting as the result of having had Invisalign braces which physically prevented me from doing it, and now I don’t have the urge. Hoping with this method I can get to the same place with my skin.
That is a great competing response. Thanks for sharing your experiences! 😃
I've been pulling my hair and it had took me 4 years to realise that what I'm doing all this period. And I know it usually happens when I'm in anxiety and just couldn't courage myself to talk to any stranger. But these videos are helping me a lot❤
Honestly, my anxiety escalated so much watching this video. but almost in a nervous energy kind of way. Like when you're anticipating a vacation coming up or something. I worry about failing again. But this series has given me hope and the ability to forgive myself. Thank you for everything you've done for me 🌷🌷🌷
You know, I thought I had my trich under control but I get relapses under stress and your videos have already given me a better understanding and tips to get to the next stage.
I am so glad to hear that! Glad I could help.
Thank you,this video is a life saver,really.I am a well accomplished person and I think highly of myself but my skin picking habit always holds me back from being fully appreciative of myself and what I do.Also I feel like since I'm hurting my skin this way that I must somehow have something against myself.You gave me a new perspective hell I even put an end to a scalp picking session watching part one !
I'm so glad this was able to help you! I wish you the best !
I thought I was alone with this problem. I pick my skin. I have scares and I am ashamed.
These videos helped so much. Thank you
Glad to hear that!
His way of speaking is amazing, it makes me believe that it isn't a big problem and I can heal it easily with no fear and shame, thank you 🙌
I am concerned about your suggestion to squeeze or hold ice. As someone who struggles with self harm, as well as skin picking, I just want to warn you that squeezing ice is considered to be another form of self harm by most people who are working to recover from self harm. I know holding ice and snapping rubber bands have traditionally been recommended to "stop" self harm, but it is now considered to simply be an alternative form of self harm that "leaves no marks". I have heard the practice of holding ice can escalate to where nerve damage is done from the cold! And snapping rubber bands can escalate to causing skin damage and bruising. These "less dangerous" forms of self harm only reinforces the mental path of harming behavior. It is better to sooth or practice forms of self care. Of course if it gets to the point where it is a choice of self harming in a dangerous way or using a "non injury" form of self harming, it is always better to avoid the more damaging form by practicing less damaging forms. Then get back on the bandwagon and work on soothing and self care and healthy distraction for the next time.
I do like the rest of your video and the suggestions you give very much!
Thanks for the thoughts and sharing about yourself. 😃 I believe it's all mindset of why someone may choose to use this method. If it's to self-harm then don't do it. If someone is choosing to do it to snap their brain out of those sticky moments, then that's what it is designed for. It's not meant to be used as a primary tool or often.
This is hands down the most informative and realistic approach I have ever heard. Finding a therapist in my area that is educated on this is very difficult. Your information is so appreciated
I’ve been pulling my hair for years, I’m only 25. I e gotten it to grow back by wearing wigs and protective styles like braids, but every time I want to go natural, I ruin in.
Anyone else here after their skin picking has put them at risk for covid? I can’t stop picking my lips and putting my fingers near my mouth 😬😬😬
Hi Thank you so much for your videos! Do you have any advice for cheek chewers? The problem is it can be done without hands, we can't get rid of our tools (since its our teeth), and I personally do it in many places and situations so I don't necessarily feel like I have a single trigger. I tried chewing gum but I find it raises the bumpy skin even more and actually increases my urge to bite!
I've worked with some who keep a small mouth guard in at times where they really feel the urge to bite. This ends up being a competing response. I was going to suggest gum, but that doesn't seem to work for you. Some suck on candy. Some just keep their teeth together or put the tongue to the roof of the mouth.
@@ocdandanxiety Wow thank you for such a quick response! I think I’m going to try really hard for a few days to be conscious of it then try the gum again. I managed to quit chewing my nails years ago so I know I can do this 🤞🤞 I’m so glad I discovered your wonderful channel 😊
Any one else constantly catching themselves chewing inside their mouths while watching this? 😕
This video was so helpful. I’ve been looking for some way to understand BFRBs and make competing responses like this for a long time - it was so helpful that you included so many examples of competing responses for the many aspects that are linked to the behaviours. THANK YOU - I feel like I finally have some new strategies for moving forward
I'm so glad it helped you!!😉
i ve noticed that the feeling of the damaged texture of my fingers makes that incredible urge to bite and make more damage until the damaged area feels like smooth area with out texture. I never pay attention of the undamaged fingers. This often happens when i am sitting on my lap top or in my bed and rarely in the street.
I'm struggling the hair pulling disorder since I was 15 years old. Sometimes my behavior gets completely stopped for 1 months or sometimes 2 and i feel like everything is better now and i don't have to get worried about this behavior. But after few days it again gets started and i again start to feel so so so much hopeless🥺 i pull out my hair for almost 5/6 hrs a day when there is no work to do. I'm almost bald 😢
But thanks to you sir, now I'm gonna make myself strong, I'll try to notice everything that's happening around me.
Lots of love and power to everyone who are going through this phase. Enjoy every moment, don't let your inner self hate you ❤️😌
I love me, and I am being soft to me❤️
These 2 videos are the best I have watched, the way you talk about it is just so lovely, usually these videos are a lot less comforting and thus less efficient! Thank you so much
I appreciate the kind words! It means a lot! I expounded on these with worksheets with my online course. www.BFRBOnline.com 😃
@@ocdandanxiety thank you, I will definitely check it out!
I'm an LCSW with trich and I have to say, from both a clinician perspective and a client perspective this is fantastic!! Thank you so much for this resource, I feel empowered to try to alter my relationship with this behavior again!
Awesome! Thank you!
So many useful techniques and very non-judgmental. I’m the boss and aim laughing at this behavior, bored or overstimulated, these are all or nothing behaviors,
. So much useful information. I’ve never heard it all presented this clearly.
Thanks so much!!
I've been a hair puller since my early teens. I'm now 35. I simply crave the texture of the knot and the rough hair. When the hair comes out I feel relief but anxiety for how I'm going to hide it. I've noticed a pattern to my pulling and I think it's seasonal. I have urges from about September to mid Feb March time and I spend most of spring and summer hiding it till it grows back. Then September comes. These 2 videos have been very helpful to relise my triggers and where and when I do it. I'm so happy I'm not the only one. Thank you so much.
I had no idea what a BFRB was until now. I have several BFRB's that I blew off as quirks for my whole life, lip chewing/rubbing being the most destructive one until a few months ago. I've been struggling to get it under control but not doing very well. It really upsets my husband, poor guy, to look over and see I've scratched myself bloody and don't even realize it. He had a hard time believing me when I told him I noticed it happens when I start getting overwhelmed and really anxious. Understandably so, it's never been an issue in the past. I felt hopeless about it but now I think I understand enough to be able to make progress. I'm thankful for professionals who are willing to share their knowledge openly like this. Thank you!
I tend to have negative thoughts and to have regrets about life. When I'm having those thoughts I start the episodes. What can I do to keep positive and feel happy with what I have and with what I have achieved in life? Thanks for your time.
I have this problem last 7 years...i have stop DOING this..but Some months ago my father died...and my hair pulling problem Start Again.. Plz help me
Check out my online course for this. www.BFRBOnline.com
@ocdandanxiety Hi, I've just come across your channel because I was looking to understand what OCD is because I have a new friend who mentionned she has OCD. I'm wondering how OCD relates to stimming in autism? What you're describing in this video would equally well describe substituting a harmless stim for a stim which is in some way maladaptive. Very interesting. And while watching the video I'm alternating between running my hands through my hair to find ones which catch on my fingers and removing them; biting my finger nails after checking whether there are any places where they don't feel smooth (which clearly there are, because I've been biting them), biting my bottom lip where it's not smooth - which it isn't because I bit it the other day as well) and thinking, I like what you're saying and I should watch this couple of videos again and choose to take some action.
Perhaps it doesn't really matter which layer of who we are which and the label we give to that layer (imagining a GIS mapping program which has different overlays with different datd sets for the same geographical location - areial photo, road map, topographical map, land use map etc - all for the same place, different ways of describing the same place)? Is my "BFRB" "autistic stimming" or "OCD"? Does it matter what label is put on it if the activity is the same and the ways of choosing to change the same?
A stim toy/fidget toy as an alternative which doesn't lead to sparse hair and bleeding, painful nails and lip might be a good idea, and interrupting the benhavioural patterns which lead to the maladaptive behaviour sounds like a plan too. And perhaps trying to identify when I do those things and what I get out of them - what do they do for me - and look at different ways of getting the same stimulation/regulation effect from something which is not maladaptive.
I wonder how OCD compulsivity would be described within the IFS (Internal Family Systems) therpary model - getting to know our compulsive part(s) and building a positive, adaptive relationship to them. I'm going to research that. Also I wonder where the O and C originate - how they relate to early childhood, family dynamics, attachment styles.
Thank you for stimulating some serious thinking and providing a new rabbit hole to go into and look around in. I love rabbit holes and trying to see how the different rabbit holes are actually just different entrances to the same warren and how the superficially different labels are in effect just different ways of looking at the same objects and phenomena. Is my desire to delve into the subject an example of an autistic "special interest" or could it be labelled an "OCD compulsion", or neither. And does it matter? I pause from typing to check my hair doesn't have any tangles in it, then rub my eyebrows and pull on my beard to make sure there aren't any loose hairs which need to be helped out. I can feel a fingernail which is now very short tapping on the keys and I want to put it to my lip so I can check it's not (but I know logically it is because I just bit it) rough in case it needs smoothing (by biting it some more - what a non-sensical thing to do). Yes, I should really do your SCAMP analysis to shine a light on what I actually do and expose it clearly to myself.
Thank you for giving some practical, actionnable things to do.
Have a nice day, Matthew
"Were not avoiding anymore" "I am the boss". This seriously helps, thank you
Damn thank you so much this is literally so much help my parents only tell me “don’t tough your face” and is not that easy this is actually helpful you don’t imagine how much you deserve more recognition
I am so glad I could help you out!
I cannot get away from thinking that finding a ‘substitute’ is just swapping the compulsion! Please don’t judge me as I’m a new viewer and this guy is absolutely AMAZING - good luck all my fellow ‘hair twiddlers! 🤞🏻🤞🏻✌🏼
Started picking my scalp when I was about 9 years old or something. Have done it on and off since then and I’m 32 now. Isn’t that crazy? What is it about me that’s made me so this my whole life?
I can stop when I know I’ll need to go get my hair done.. or if I get gel nails, I can’t and don’t do it. Just don’t want to have to get fake nails. Wish I could find the answer.
I pick at my face and have done since I can remember prob since a teenager I’m now 49. I hate it and concealer is my best friend. I used to bite my nails but I get sns put on top now so I don’t bite. I hate the roughness but I want to stop it. Def have to take on board his comments
What if you have more than one of these behaviors? Do you tackle one at a time, or all at once?
I've been a lifelong hair-puller (eyelashes and eyebrows) and it has caused so much shame and sense of inferiority. I'm so grateful for eye makeup! I recently discovered that by standing far enough away from the mirror when applying makeup that I can't see individual hairs, I'm not tempted. Sight and sensation (pulling actually feels good) are my triggers. So by not being able to SEE hairs that will taunt me, the tension doesn't build in the first place. It's working so far! I hope this will help someone else.
This made me realize how challenged we all are. Man. Being human is not easy..!
Hi! First of all, I think and I would love to thank you for it - you helped me. And I'm absolutely grateful for it.
I have one problem related to skin picking, besides the act itself, I flex my jaw. I don't do it consciously and don't know how it happens, but whenever I see skin picking, do it or think about it, I flex my jaw to the point it hurts me and I'm left with this awful feeling afterwards - it's when I notice I've been flexing my jaw. I don't clench my teeth, bottom side doesn't even touch the upper side, I feel it only with my lower jaw. Is there anything I could do about it?
Thanks so much for the kind words! That sounds very painful with your jaw. We typically would treat this the same and come up with competing responses for it and sit through the urge to do it. Some may choose to hold their finger to their jaw. I have a video coming out about tics and the treatment. It may help you gain some clarity of what you can do about it. 😃
I love you. Thank you so much. From my whole being. And sending you all so much love and hugs. We got this!!!! 💞
This has given me so much hope and motivation. Thank you!
I'm so glad!
This video brought me so much relief… 23 years of picking- gonna start implementing these tools & will update!
Today is day 1 as it’s 5am lol
I have Trichotillomania. I had a relapse this week and so I looked for some encouragement to keep trying to move forward. Thank you for this video (and the one before about SCAMP.) They gave me a boost!
Relapses can be scary and defeating, but I am glad I could help boost some morale. You've got this!
I really like the pain sensation when pulling the hair now I am looking for something constructive to replace it.
That is good to know for yourself. Sometimes it's hard to find a good replacement. Let us know if you find something that works well for you! 😃
@@ocdandanxiety I found an interesting way to replicate the pain, waxing. I brought some waxing stripes and started regular waxing. Now I can have clean legs as well lol.
@@leqingzhang5311 Oh wow! That's amazing. Thanks for sharing what you've learned with others! 🤪
Look up seven star dermal needle or massage needle plum blossom. On eBay. I am an acupuncturist and these are for pain relief but can and are used for scalp massage. The tiny needles give the same effect as when you pull the hair. And will also stimulate new hair growth . Just a gentle tapping really gives the same sensation . A sweet pain . But instead of damage to yr hair. You are helping new hair . Hope 5his works for you .
@@lesleyevans6691 Thank you! will give a try
This hurts so much. I feel like a complete waste. For me its scalp scabs and dandruff. I can't remember the first one I had. I love searching my scalp for the rough patch of skin looking for an edge to get under and...the release like finding buried treasure. I eat them I think that's the issue I love the chase but to find one to eat is my goal. The larger the better, I like hard ones more if you pick more than once a day they tend to be thicker but soft and it sticks to your teeth and it's 100% less satisfying. I let them sit and continue to pick. I started eating crystallized eye crust to compensate for when I've done too much. I want to say I eat the scabs because of low iron but I KNOW it isn't true. I don't eat dandruff btw.
You are not a complete waste! You're amazing! I can tell! 😃 -- Thanks for sharing these experiences. You're not alone in this!
Scalp scabs are the WORST
I’m the exact same way with scalp scans as treasure.. have never had any desire to eat them after tho.
Wowwwwwww..... This really helps😁😁😁😉😊😊😊about 2 months ago I watched ur video and look now,, I'm able to control this urge and I haven't pulled any hair since I've watched ur video and I'm saying it for real. Still sometimes I think what if I start doing that again but now I feel weird when I put my hands to the hairs and now I can say that now I don't feel those irrestible urges anymore .. Thank u so much❤️🙏
Wow. Amazing! Thanks for the follow up! That makes me happy that you've done so well! 👍🏻
Thanks for these videos, I wish I had thought of looking for videos earlier! I really think I have a better understanding of how to combat this habit almost a decade in the making. You've given me hope!
Happy to help!
This is just gonna make me overthink and pull out my hair more subconciously 😭
It seems like it does the opposite. The more someone is aware the less likely they are to actually do it because they learn to have a choice over it. Obviously each person is different. I hope you can find something that works for you.
Ready to take my life back, thank you so much!!😭❤️
This is by far the most useful BFRBs video I have ever seen. THANK YOU :)
Glad it helped! 😃
honestly, looking back it's always like "why didnt i think of doing this", but in the moment it's simply not feasable. thank you for giving me a different perspective
This is so helpful thank you so much :) I've been picking excessively since i'm mostly just alone in my room during quarantine. i always pick my lips until they're "smooth" have been doing that all my life. and i have had eczema so it's really hard not to pick when it's flaky. I even had it on my scalp and currently have it which is where i'm doing all the damage right now. I used to pick my skin a lot but i just stopped "checking" my skin for acne and just avoid standing really close to the mirror in my room (where i would stand and pick) and my skin cleared up. something i use to help is whenever i'm watching youtube or netflix I will ALWAYS be playing a mindless game on my phone. like doodle jump or candy crush. I just always have to have my hand busy. a lot of the time i'll put the phone down and "attack" ( lol) my scalp. my scalp is all wet and oozing as i'm typing i know that's gross sorry. anyways this is just a reminder for me to stop. i just ordered a fidget cube to try maybe that will help. thank you again so much for these videos.
How do you know I’m not just Autistic and it’s stimming. Maybe it’s providing self soothing that I actually need.
I never realized until now really that this was like, a real diagnosable thing. I’ve always struggled with pulling out my eyelashes, biting my nails and fingertips almost to bleeding sometimes but not usually. Also I have done the same to my toes but usually I don’t do it to my toes. :/ wondering if I should get this checked out
Fantastic videos! Thank you so much. I skin pick and chew my cheeks and lips. Do you have any suggestions for how to stop the cheek and lip biting?