I’ve been working since I was 15, I’m 36 now, and I haven’t found meaning in my work in my entire life. I recognize it for what it is, a means to provide. Find meaning somewhere else.
Yes working for a wage rather than to just directly provide for your own basic needs will pretty much always feel meaningless. When I'm splitting firewood I feel that it has more meaning than when I'm slugging through paperwork & engineering dwgs or updating databases even though that pays much more money than I can make chopping my own firewood.
I totally agree! Some look for validation from doing a good job at work. I dont hate or discpize my work I just dont feel any worse or better after doing it lol
Thanks you for saying that Warren. And if you can find ‘meaning’ in your work, that is the icing on the cake and not the goal. The goal is to provide your employer with someone who is dependable and that is justified in his wages. All this mental babble that young people are buying into means eventually there will be no one to build a house or apts; No one to cook & teach in schools. The future is bleak.
@TheR3alRyan It's always smart to have a job replacement before quitting a job. Employers are not as inclined to hire someone who is not employed. And you can't predict whether someone will hire you in whatever time frame your finances can handle. That being said, you don't have to stay in your miserable job forever but you do need to have a new job before you leave your miserable job.
I teach that to my students but I also told them that once I broke this rule due to two twiddle Dee and dumb bosses. Even you won't be able to handle it.
My brother used to do that, quit his jobs when somebody does something he doesn't like. Did that until he was 50 years old then finally woke up when family members stopped letting him borrow money.
She has a history of getting fired and quitting jobs. She can't handle her jobs and gets easily frustrated. She has trouble getting along with people at her jobs. These are not qualities of a good therapist.
Yeahhhhh seems like often shrinks and counselors and such enter those fields to try and better understand themselves.... which doesn't work and is way more expensive than simply going and getting counseling. Lol
I was a single mother for 17 years....worked several jobs to make ends meet. Met my husband 9 years ago and I continued working until he asked me to be a stay at home wife. We sold our large home, bought a small home and paid it off, sold our second vehicle to only have one payment and now we can live off of one income. My kids are already 26, 23 and 17 now but it takes a lot of hard work to make sure you and your kids have everything they need. If you want to live off of one income you have to he prepared to sacrifice a lot of wants. I cook most meals here at home, we don't go on extravagant vacations. It's doable but you have to learn to be very frugal.
@@annasimons389 I've heard that a lot of men have a hero complex, which causes some of them to see single moms as vulnerable and in need of help. It triggers the protective instinct in some men, even if they never thought they could seriously consider a single mom before. They can make a man feel useful or needed. Also, some people become a better, more beautiful person after becoming a parent, and others are drawn to that.
My ex was constantly doing this, wouldn’t take a job unless it filled his soul. After he left us, he was unemployed for 10 months and it was always somehow my fault. 😂 Luckily, I earned enough to just get by and provide for my family but with small children and childcare it was very stressful. But I did it and I’m proud of me. I agree you have to find your “career” satisfying but a job is to pay the bills, especially when you have a family to provide for.
As I tell my wife I'm a psychologist for 95% of my day and I do eye exams (I'm actually an optometrist). Healthcare is not for the faint of heart if you're not emotionally stable. If his wife just wants to be a stay at home wife then help clear the debt in 2 years and then stay home with the kids. No shame in that.
@@hhf4312flawed, you clearly aren’t a woman or don’t have kids. Being pregnant takes a lot out of a woman especially the first couple of months it’s emotional wreck. He is in the military it’s ok for her to focus on the family first then help clear some debt when the child gets older.
@@Trysaratop She was like this way before she was pregnant! The pregnancy just amplified her lack of coping ability. She's in the wrong field. I've been in health care as a Respiratory Therapist for 30 years, retired now, and dealing with challenging people is not for very many people.
“I own this place and I hate this place sometimes”That had me laughing so hard. True insight from Dave. Life is full of contrast. Embrace it and fall forward.
So sick to hear all the time that this person has anxiety, this person has anxiety - as excuses for not dealing with life. At this time in our country with all that is going on here and around the world - we are ALL anxious! Deal with it and get on with taking care of your family!
I hear that term all the time, and nobody can tell me what it is. 'I have anxiety.' Yes, don't we all? We need it to function as a human being. Even animals have it and need it. It wouldn't be good if you didn't have anxiety. You'd be the worst psychopath of all times. It's different if you have pathological, unreasonable fears, like phobias, but that's not what they mean by anxiety. So... what is it?
Common feelings that are part of everyone’s life (e.g. anxiety, grief) are now labeled as mental illness. I’ve heard other people use anxiety as an excuse to avoid work.
Imagine even more than that, thinking if you sink yourself even further into debt and get a bigger degree that it will be worth it. I'm 31 and I see this with more and more friends everyday. They're not satisfied with their income (lifestyle creep) so they get more degrees and it just keeps perpetuating
I don't need to. That was most of my adult life. Only been making more than that for about a year. I also owe 15k more than them. The lie that we've been sold on higher education. I am so thankful someone gifted me FPU a couple of years ago, or my life would look so different now. Edited for typos.
Oh, I used to have her problems...that until I realized I WAS THE PROBLEM. Once I changed my mind set, started developing the actual skills required to perform my job (social ones included, which turns out to be quite important), and understanding why I am being paid and how hard it is to keep a business run, lots of things changed for me and actually I really started to develop my career at that point.
A lot of people love to hire women with big dreams to abuse them and feel better about being a middle manager somewhere. But I agree for the social skills, I got let go from an internship once for asking too many questions, and people felt bad about not having answers. I know it wasn't performance related because the other division we worked for had me come back to present because my report was the best one they had seen in 10 years.
Absolutely right. When I changed my attitude and my outlook on life, work, etc things improved. If I wasn’t successful, I was the catalyst and no one else.
I've told my children repeatedly that they'll rarely find fulfillment in employment. Fulfillment comes from spending time with your family, church, friends.
Why is it bad to want fulfillment at a job where you’re happy and feel like you’re making a difference? The people in these comments are a stick in the mud
@@musicandpoetry_8 You can enjoy your work for sure, It's more of finding a Job that you can be content with and not hate it. If you can find a fulfilling job by all means go for it but no job is perfect.
Very few 23 year olds have the emotional maturity, life experience and wisdom to effectively counsel others, and that’s without taking unresolved issues into consideration. Not to mention, the therapy fields teach students to be mindful of their own impairment so as to protect their clients from further harm-it’s even written into their code of ethics. I admire this woman’s desire to help others, but she needs a hard reset on her priorities: self-care, basic responsibilities, then purpose and meaning.
She's so young. She should focus on therapy for herself and being a mom. There's plenty of time after she figures out her own issues and raises the kid to school age to finish her degree and find a meaningful career.
This is an example of why 23 is too young to get married and have kids for many people. Go live your life, make mistakes, come back and get married in 5 more years.
@@davidhale4647 At 13 I was trying to get a job 😂 By college years was doing so many temp jobs that it lead to my first permante job at age 23 and I kept it for nearly 15yrs before I moved on to the next. Every interview I been on they were shocked I kept a job for so long. I didn’t understand them at all. But for the position it worked in my favor because it showed loooong term commitment. If his wife keeps bouncing around, she will become unemployable. Employers want commitment on some level. She’s better off creating her career that fits what ever it is she is searching for. So I don’t know I guess as they say everyone is different.
Social worker, she must be so stressed. I was a teacher aide for an elementary school. And the children are so broken, and have so many issues, at such a young age. There's only so much you can do to help them.
She might have _Asperger’s;_ such individuals rarely function without meaning in their work. She should avoid jobs where there’s small talk, formalities & red tape. Sounds like me before I knew
I have a friend the same way. She earns north of $150K, and has lax responsibilities. She wants to leave because she doesn’t feel fulfilled. I recommended she find fulfillment in her children, not her job. This is not an economy to job hop.
Show her the Bible verse... Colossians 3:23 NIV [23] Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, Implementing this changed EVERYTHING for me because giving up a $150k job? Yikes!! Noooo!😅
Tell her to get a job serving tables, she’ll make WAY more than $30k. I served tables my entire 10 years of my 20s and tbh it was the most rewarding job I’ve ever had. I love talking to people and helping them and that job made me feel very very rewarded. I felt like a psychologist with my tables sometimes
I make $17 an hour at a grocery store. It's one of many part time jobs I have. That actually comes to $13 an hour so I wonder if she's part time or something.
As a licensed social worker and independently licensed therapist, I cant tell you how many peers went into this field to fix themselves. But front that its to help others. This guy’s wife needs to sort out her own issues. She is going to project all that on her baby and future clients if she even gets that far in her career.
This guy needs to say no to the extra degree. That’s just more money down the drain with no roi. He should find her a good counselor and let her be a stay at home mom. This happens over and over. Women get these degrees and become psychologists and then drop out of the field. There is actually a shortage at the moment. Personally I think that’s because women dominate the field but can’t handle it emotionally and leave. Men a discouraged from entering because it’s portrayed as a “women’s” job. So you get high turnover and shortages. But this guy needs that drain on the family income like a hole in the head. Just say NO!
@@jameshetu6885I agree with what you stated about the field being dominated by women (which isn't always good). I recently obtained my addiction counselors degree with hopes to move up soon once I have my certification. However, the field encourages counselors and therapist to have their own while in the field to balance all the emotions they take on talking to people.
I work in Adult Protection Services for the country. I about spit my coffee out when i heard she sat around for a MONTH "waiting for a phone call" that led to an irreversible action. That girl needs to start working at McDonald's to learn some basic leadership skills first before trying to "help" people's pyche.
@@susannovak8263 From the USA. Most of my cases are adults who are a danger to themselves and/or neglected by their caregivers- usually adult children or spouses who neglects the client. Other times they have no family and need assistance to handle their cares. We network with other facilities and so "waiting a month for a phones" is unacceptable.
@@susannovak8263every state has its own adult services department. It's comparable to the children's services department. They mostly handle the elderly and the physically and mentally handicapped.
It’s so weird listening to this because my husband practically begged me to leave my toxic job I had been at for over 12 years and I had the hardest time letting go because they had a great 401k contribution and other good benefits. I finally pulled the plug and found a new job with a fresh start but I felt like a failure quitting after almost 13 years!
12 yrs is not the same as 6 months. In your case your job was likely the issue and you shouldn't be ashamed..you tried for 12 yrs!! But lets be honest..SHE is the issue here not her job. 6 months and still training on the computer(at 23, I'm 30 and we were taught basic computer skills in school including the Microsoft suite) her Co workers aren't mean they are annoyed that her mess ups make more work for them. And her track record of bouncing from job to job is a clear indicator that she is the problem. All workplaces have their own issues..you deal with it and move on when you get a better offer. Also she has over 50k in debt but is making only 30k per year and wants to quit this job again despite not knowing if she will find another or even if she wants to work elsewhere...if she wasn't married she'd be drowing.
She's in heavy debt. And who is going to pay for it? Him? I got pregnant in a similar situation and sucked it up and worked. Don't have unprotected sex when you need to work. She honestly sounds manipulative. There's no comparison.
😮😮😮I left a company after 24 years due to an extremely toxic work environment. Sooooo many of my coworkers died at in their 40s/50s and early 60s. I'm convinced it was due to the poisonous atmosphere and heavy workload. The company had VERY good benefits and great pay but what good would that do me if I'm 6 ft under??? I found a job that pays much less but I'm not constantly on edge and the workload is a piece of cake. There are regrets I have about leaving the other job but I have to remind myself of how unhappy I was. It was like a black cloud following me around 24/7. I no longer have that black cloud. I was ALWAYS worried about getting fired because it was soooo hard keeping up with the work.
Nothing wrong with that! You men are sick in the head not wanting to work and provide for your family. A woman home can safe a ton of money and in many cases is way better for the family
Men generally should expect that if they are married and they are having sex with their wives unprotected that she possibly will conceive their child! That is something that men need to factor in before they get their wives pregnant! Its life and it happens in case you didn't know that! Ridiculous!
I relate to her. I worked 3 jobs in 2023 and when it got hard I dipped. I am now working a job that does take a bit of a mental toll on me because I get mentally drained and exhausted however I am sticking to it until its been over a year to bounce and find another job. I do therapy and do things outside of work that keep me mentally sane. It is not easy, coming from someone who quit 3 jobs within half a year but I am 26 not a child anymore therefore I had to stop with the victim mind set and suck it up. Also get in mind that I worked a job for over 2 years right after undergrad so life is a roller coaster.
Raising children is in women’s nature. They were not made to slave away at the widget factory. It’s demonic that weak men for their wife to go serve another man.
She's likely hormonal and emotional because she's pregnant and... a woman. She may be far better at home doing what women were physically designed by God to do. Dave is telling her to suck it up as a 23 year old pregnant woman? The first thing I thought was she needs to go home and stay home to raise her child. For many women that will bring fulfillment above and beyond a career. She wants to help people? She can help her own family. Why is the default to boot the wife and mother out of the house to make an income? That's nowhere in the Bible. Titus 2:4-5 KJV 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. 1 Timothy 5:14 KJV - I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.
@@Kim-bv3xn I wonder why people are so opposed to the idea of mother staying home with her own child? Dave Ramsey has said that his wife was at home raising their children while he was working, but when there are callers that suggest such a thing he tells them to get to work.
LIFE is challenging. My siblings and I took on adult responsibilities at a very young age due to my parents being ill and unable to work. If we didn't work we didn't eat ect. Nothing in a workplace could compare to it, that made us stronger and the ability to take a bullet or two.
Almost all of us have been abused at a job, and I'm no exception to this. Now that I've been in the work force for nearly 30 years, I'm firmer with people and won't allow them to treat me that way at the place I work. The vast majority of the people I work with are kind and caring, but sometimes there might be one or two people who give me a hard time.
"When the wind blows, she storms out of the room" - this is exactly what my husband is like. He recently got promoted and it didn't take long for him to realize that as we get paid more, it's expected that the work gets tougher too. I also got recently promoted and I have always been the major earner between us.. Sometimes, I feel like he sees this as his easy ticket way out of being responsible. We have 2 small kids ages 10 and below. His 1st work anniversary was 4 months ago and this is his 1st job after a 2.5 year-long hiatus. Aside from that, his parents are extremely financially unwise and practically live off their kids' support - no retirement plan planned whatsoever. I am based in the Philippines, but I think problems such as this cross race, location and scenarios but the root cause is mainly the same - fear of responsibility.
First jobs are tough because it's when you learn that bosses and coworkers can be awful. Accepting that it will likely be the same everywhere is the key to managing a career. Let things roll off, don't react to annoyances, etc. Make a game out of being overly nice to people who suck. Fighting the system will bring misery. Spare your emotional energy for people in your life who matter. Sounds like this girl isn't cut out for social work. No worries, most of us have no clue about a career at age 23. A bachelor's or master's degree in psychology, whatever she has, can be useful in more analytic careers like clinical research.
If your life experience is that way then that just means you were sheltered and didn't have a clue as to how life worked until you thrown into the thick of it. These are the snowflake types they talk a lot about on this show.
We are a 6 figure income couple and had very little saved and not much cash lying around the preverbal". '...don't have $500 for an emergency" that was us. The big thing was debt all kinds of it, cars mortgage (although our home isn't a high price one), student loans for our kids, and of course credit cards. One day we just got sick of being broke and went total scorched earth and became frugal overnight. Paid it all off, it took almost 5 years but now we have no debt and this year our savings rate is 50% on basically the same income that had us perpetually broke. So for us it is mainly staying out of debt and watching our spending, at first it was a real effort to save in our HISA and 401Ks but now it's actually fun watching our money grow. No car or vacation or neighborhood is worth being broke or financially unstable.
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Entry level social work jobs are incredibly intense emotionally, really rough, families with so many problems. It's a job for the few who can handle it. Really, give the woman a break. My daughter does that work at age 23 and after 2 years she's already burnt out, and she LOVES the work. It's hard.
@@wilhoit haha, but also, we have no other context here, and she never said she wouldn't get a new job. I don't see anything wrong with changing jobs as long as it's not lower paying.
I had an internship with the county humane services. Those social workers always showed up to the meetings looking stressed out and complaining about lack of resources. It’s not a job for everyone
Worked all my life, started babysitting at 14. I am a social worker, it's a thankless job. But never once thought about not working. Bills still need paid.
She's only 23. She should focus on therapy for herself and being a mom. There's plenty of time after she figures out her own issues and raises the kid to school age to finish her degree and find a meaningful career.
So, I literally love my job. I'm a roller coaster mechanic, I graduated from college as an an interior designer. When I graduated, I was like, I wanna work in rides because I love them. Here we are, I've been a roller coaster mechanic for 18 years❤
My wife always wanted to quit her job for 2 years so I can somewhat relate. But the thing was she didn't want me to work 2 jobs, I told her that was the only way to survive. At least 90% of people hate their jobs, it's never about loving what you do, its about working to be able to do what you love to do. Thats just how life is whether you like it or not.
This is correct! If one wins the lottery or has enough money to live. I bet most likely they will travel and quit his or her job. Working is just to earn money. If you have enough money to live until you retire without working. Would you still want to work fulltime?
@@sbeasley7100 I probably would. Very fluid if you don’t like one area you can move to another. I’ve been in some terrible working conditions and there are rude and mean patients but I’ve saved lives and helped a lot of people for sure. It’s not for the faint of heart us need some grit. lol.
It seems like we are going more towards indentured servitude/serfdom than progress. People are working more and getting less. And the nature of the work is getting worse. Acceptance of this is what leads to work continuing to get worse Why do we not demand better from our workplaces? Don’t work for places that don’t respect you
The wife sounds very immature. He messed up getting her pregnant. You effed up, dude. When Dave says "and she wants to be a psychologist!?" and the husband laughs, you know it's because he knows it's ridiculous.
Also, she want's to go another $50k into debt for a masters. She has daddy issues, and cannot retain a job. The timing of the pregnancy also just happens as she is unhappy in her current position. This dude is in for a lifetime of hurt.
At 23 years old, it's probably wise for someone to live alone independently, in order to realize how important keeping a job truly is or else your lights get turned off or you can't afford that tuna sandwich at the deli 😂 That taught me very quick.
I know everyone is hard on her. Be mindful 23 is still young and she’s still figuring out what she wants to do. I did social work for 5 years and left (found another job first). My job wasn’t that bad but there are much worse out there which is why I didn’t go searching for a different SW job. And the pay isn’t great. You need a Masters for a decent pay job. It’s true that you go into the field to help people but often people don’t want the help. She may need to leave the field all together and then maybe she’d stop job hopping. Or maybe she does have deeper issues of getting along with others so it won’t change. With the little information we have it’s hard to judge that for certain.
Very few people actually like everything about their job. That’s why it’s called work. There were many stressful times during my 41 year career but I had 5 people depending on me for their existence so I sucked it up.
This Bible verse changed my perspective at work and actually made things bearable... Colossians 3:23 NIV [23] Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,
He married a kid. At 23 and pregnant, she has you roped in. Plan on getting a 2nd job because this PG honey wants to be a mommy and have you foot the bill. Forever.
Yep. Seen that movie a million times. You'd be amazed how many of these women get a Masters Degree with tons of debt, many never even work in their field of study, than end up finding some simp (like this guy) who works himself to death to support her and the kids.
@@jennpul1015 I think many of us were unplanned and by unresponsible people decades ago. I just have trouble visualizing a young man and woman sitting around with coffee and then planning a conception. Nope, usually hot pants after drinks. Your thoughts!
At the same time you have to find a job that fits you and supports you emotionally and physically and all aspects. I had a job as a first year teacher and I lost weight, I cried everyday, and I was extremely depressed. I stayed for the year and knew that I had to find something else to do. I think she could try to see a career counselor but again she’s only 23. It’s hard and a lot of pressure to know what career you’d want to do for the rest of your life at 23… it sounds like her husband is supportive and does want to help her. All I’m saying is that it’s easy to judge others but if you’ve never been in a toxic work environment then you don’t understand.
just to add another perspective, social work is such a hard job. it burns you out so fast. people go into social work to help people but it winds up consuming the person trying to help.
It’s hard but how hard is it to figure that out? If you’re taking out a loan to study it, doing basic “would I even like this sort of work” thinking is very much required. It always gets me. Teachers go in having no idea what teaching in a public school is actually like, then graduate, try it out, hate it and quit.
@@TheresaReichley A people have to work and B don't know much without trying it. Not a simple search for so many jobs... For example it is ;likely easier to run a concentration camp than a formal prison with rules.... Work is likely very similar....
If you are not cut out for a career, do research and homework first. Most of us just have to work but there are other work choices. Don’t keep going down the same old rabbit hole. Mary
@@marvinthomason8540 It's very hard to understand what a particular job is like when you're only 17 and don't know anything about the branch or work in general. Then you get an education and you like it, but after 3 years you find out you're not really up for most jobs. What are you supposed to do then? Not finish your education? You don't have many options in that situation. The only thing you can do really is get to work anyway, and hope you can slowly create a situation that's better, or maybe educate yourself towards something different.
My wife also has a tendency to quit her jobs and I think she is about to do it again. She was a full time mom and started working when the boys moved out 10 years ago. She has had 4 jobs in the 10 years and quit everyone because she did not like how she was being treated. There was a 2 year period where she did not work at all. I tried to explain to her that I cannot just quit because I was not invited to a meeting or my boss did not take my advice. In general some women do not understand how much pressure it is for men who have to work no matter what to provide for the family. We have been married 40 years and we love each other but this is one area that causes me pain in our relationship. Our plan is for me to retire in June 2024 and to put 100% of her income into a fund to remodel our Kitchen. It is going to be hard to convince her not to quit because her boss is quitting (her best work friend) and her sister is in the hospital in another state. So I will need to tread lightly on the subject.
Stay at home mother's for years get in the habit of having the husband's income as a safety net That's why mother's should always at least work or do something once children are at school
@@ykook7000 I think you are right and would add that stay at home mothers are in charge of the family. Once they get a job they are not in charge and if people at work do not do it their way they get frustrated and quit.
I'm an old female so what do I know but have you actually said to her that you feel it's not fair on an emotional level? Your retirement is only 7 months away and she can't wait that long? So be it - no kitchen renovation if she doesn't continue to work .
I know this sounds harsh but i wouldn't want to have a baby with someone who first thought when she has something go wrong at her job is to just quit. Adults have responsibilities and bills dont pay themselves, children do what they want, good luck to you buddi your in for a long road of being the sole provider, sounds like a road to resentment to me
She will be a stay at home mom while he works himself to death. If the divorce come the system will reward her with his pension, assets, alimony and child support.
I'm actually diagnosed and medicated for both general and social anxiety. My anxiety actually makes me want to stay with my job because it's my comfort zone, it's what I'm familiar with and what I know. I don't know how some people can bounce around from job to job, just the thought of that almost gives me an anxiety attack. 😂
She has to think of the bigger picture, like needing health insurance throughout her pregnancy. It’s usually a lot more affordable to cover yourself with your own employer plan, than it is to be added to a spouse’s plan. You also typically have to be at your job for a year before you can access any maternity leave or short-term disability benefits. If she bounces to a new job right now, she won’t have that by the time she delivers.
I quit my job when my third baby was born… it was impulse. Going back to work was too hard. My husband just hugged me and told me congratulations. We made it work and I’m so thankful that my husband supported me during that time.
Thats exactly where I am right now. We just had our third and I'm a social worker and the work is too mentally and emotionally hard 12 years in... I'd rather do more part jobs now!
Same here. I’m an RN and still have not returned to work as my third has turned one year old this month. We are making one income work and I would love to go back to work. However, the only option I have is to work weekends given the nature of nursing shifts. I would love to find work that doesn’t require me to sacrifice sleep and perform logistical acrobatics to get my kids taken care of while I’m away
@@jessicab6876 When my third turned 6 months-old I started working part time and remote to make the budget stretch a bit more. It was a great balance for me and let me stay close to my babies when I felt they still really needed me. I hope you found something too!
@@somethingsaboutmary3134 I heard some nurses get a full-time salary just being on-call over night? I think one woman told me she works once per month. She just has to have her family on the ready to step in and watch the kids if needed. Is that still a thing?
Life ain't all sunshine and rainbows. Too many people act as if they believe they're never supposed to be uncomfortable... As if a good life is a default position you never have to work for. Seems to be a recurring theme.
As a social worker I am cursed on a daily basis. It's part of the job. It is known as an abrasive field. We represent the establishment... it's nothing personal.
The problem is that young people need to learn how to deal with difficult people/conflicts. Regardless of what happens in life, she needs to learn to deal with problems. This is coming from someone who couldn't handle a customer being upset and little things when I entered the workforce at 22 because I was coddled a bit. If you can't handle minor inconveniences, you need to practice it. Life will throw you problems and you need to be able to handle them. It's part of growing up. Dave's advice is spot on.
I definitely sucked it up at the age of 19 when my husband and I married and we also lived in an economically depressed area, which didn’t have a lot of job openings. So, I worked at a factory making men’s shirts for 7 years. I agree, she needs to suck it up. You simply have to do what you can in order for better opportunities in the job market.
My ex-wife went through a ridiculous amount of jobs within a couple of years, claiming "stress" and "depression" were the causes of her quitting. Me, trying to be supportive but realistic, told her that we would make it financially BUT that's going to look like crap on a resume. Well, the "stress and depression" continued, even while unemployed and watching TikTok and screwing around on Snapchat during the day and doing NOTHING to help upkeep the house. The moral of the story is 1. No matter how stressed and depressed you get, you still have to make a living and 2. If you have someone willing to support you, don't bite the hand that feeds with lazy, self-entitled behavior. Dave is right. SUCK IT UP.
I worked for my parents for 13 years before quitting. I quit 2 jobs within a year, because I had no idea what I wanted to do. Each time I wondered if I was quitting because I was weak, or if it really was a bad fit. My current job I absolutely love! And quite frankly I don't regret taking those other jobs. It helped me progress a lot. But yes I agree most people who quit often is because it's too hard or their boss criticized them.
And honestly what made me realize I wasn't a quitter is when my boss completely chewed me out. I apologized, expressed how I messed up, how I would do better, and went back to work more determined. Lol it sounds weird but working under my parents seriously made me question my capabilities in the real world. I did make mistakes, I still make mistakes, but I am happy where I am at. Hard work is the best satisfaction. I can't even quite describe it. It sucks and is rewarding all at once. Lol and that is my rant.
As someone with ADHD and anxiety, sometimes what happens is that we have to mask in certain environments and the extra stress of that is extremely fatiguing. I have always been a very hard worker, but forcing myself to not listen to my body led to a full on burnout at 35. Close to an autistic burnout. It was very serious and I couldn’t work for about 6 months. The more I pushed, the more I regressed. It was horrible. I did recover. But the reason it happened was not listening to my body. Many people need meaning in work (especially PDA types). Sometimes these people work best with entrepreneur type things or building up multiple streams of income. She also may just need to figure out which jobs suit her best. There are also some jobs that have toxic environments and it sounds like this particular job is one. I think if she builds up a side business before she quits or gets a new job before quitting, then she’s ok. I think the “sucking it up” piece doesn’t work when someone hits a mental wall. Someone with experience with anxiety is the perfect person for psychologist. I like DR, but felt he really doesn’t have enough understanding of mental health issues to answer this one. It’s the “make it or break it” mentality. Sure it’s great if you make it, but what about the people who break? Often pushing past our limit doesn’t lead us to a good long term goal. And the job she has now doesn’t sound good. Better to just get a different one where she can feel inspired, while also earning an income.
These comments make me super uncomfortable. Lots of ableist talk. I was healthy physically and mentally got the majority of my life. It’s the biggest privilege I ever took for granted. The answer isn’t to push, it’s to figure out a strategy that works for you without damaging your health.
Landlord and bank doesn’t care your autistic. Do what you promised to do which is pay them. They are consequences if you don’t. This is coming from one who also is autistic. We are all worthless scum at the end of the day if we provide no value and not br someone someone else wants to work with. There is no paradise or nirvana in this world. -Richard Sowell.
I've been "sucking it up" amongst toxic coworkers for the last seven years. The stress has led me to self-destructive behavior...so now I'm more in debt than ever. It turns out "sucking it up till I'm out of debt" was not a good plan.
@@therocinante3443 Everyone is responsible for their behavior and its consequences. I am. So are my coworkers. If you treat someone like crap and they spiral as a result of it, do you consider it not your problem? That's classic sociopath mentality.
@@maylynbayani I never once blamed my actions on anyone else; that was your own un-analytical conclusion. By your view, if someone is abusive their victim should just bounce back all sunny, smiling and undamaged... and if they don't it's their own fault. If you walk down the same street every day and someone there always punches you in the face, you will bruise. You don't have control over whether or not you will bruise. You DO have control over whether you continue to walk past them or not. I believed "sucking it up" and staying on the same path for years was the right thing to do...but I kept bruising. I finally took a different path and left so the bruises could heal.
If I quit every job I felt bad at I would have quit eleventy-hundred jobs by now, if I could even still find one. Companies don't hire you to be happy. They hire you to work, first and foremost. And on a secondary level, you'll probably have to be bored, or frustrated, or bump into unkind people who try to demean and/or undermine you routinely. You think you left junior high school behind when you graduated and entered the world of work? Congratulations, you just entered junior high school professionally. It is what it is. Make the best of it like a grown-ass man or woman.
My ex husband did this, hated every job he had, always quitting to go hide in another grad degree. When I was young, like the caller, i used to say oh no omg of course you should quit your job if you hate it and another degree would yes probably get you a higher paying or better job... 15 years of this. Eventually i flipped out on him, grow up!!! You can't afford to quit your job, you have two kids, bills, a car and student loans to pay off, shut up and suck it up like the rest of us!! Which of course made me the witch with a b which wasn't fair to me, plus I always had to pay for just about everything. Thus the "ex" status. And I will say what Dave and his daughter are too polite to say.... Your wife got pregnant to avoid work, TONS of women do this!! She will avoid ever going back to work for probably at least the next 18 years.
I respectfully disagree. She got pregnant to get out of working, but she will want to go back to work outside the home after a couple of years max because she'll find out what a thankless and difficult job it often is to be a SAHM. She strikes me as someone who will not be truly satisfied no matter where she goes or what she does.
I'm going through the same situation at home. I'm done being the sole provider, caregiver, housekeeper and emotional punchbag.. Looking for a new place to live... wish me luck!
@@marilynbartlett1850 SHe won't even be able to handle raising a child. She will be overwhelmed if she thinks her coworkers are too much for her, a kid will send her reeeling. He should be very worried.
To be honest, i relate to the wife. It’s not that I think what she does is right, because its not, but as someone who wasn’t allowed to get a job till I was 19, and someone who didn’t know how to drive till I was 21, work was the only life that I had outside of a toxic home life, so I didn’t stick it out as much. I also come to realize that some of the negative scenarios at work were due to an undiagnosed disorder that I’m just now learning about and learning how to cope with.
I have the same problem as her! I can’t stay on a job more than a year the longest I stayed was 5 years! I’m currently working at Amazon Flex and work when I want to but fucccc I just want to find a job I love! 😢
She's doesn't want to work now, and she'll likely not work after having the kid. Very few people work in a field that makes them feel good all the time. It serves a purpose. For her, it's paying the student loans she racking up on a degree she likely won't use. He sounds like a very supportive husband who will soon become an ex-husband because "she's no longer happy" and call him a narcissist. Sounds like she's making it everyone else's job to make her feel good. Smh. I hope I'm wrong but this sounds utterly ridiculous and childish and I think he's trying his best to put her in a good light.
You hit the nail on the head. Definitely a future ex with this one. She's not able to put long-term goals over her immediate desire to feel good, which is essentially the mentality of a toddler.
The timing of the kid is also more than suspicious. These days you can, and should, try and plan when to get serious about having kids. She now gets the pregnancy as an excuse for not doing anything. Hope I am wrong, but he is likely in for a lifetime of hurt.
Yupp. She's 23. If she's decent looking she will have the child then wait a bit, then leave him for a guy who can give her the resources financially she wants without having to work.
What many people here do not seem to understand is that people go to professions like psychology from their own broken parts. It is because they understand the troubles, they want to help, but equally, they want to learn about themselves also. What is happening however, is that she has not gotten to the bottom of her own issues and perhaps a Masters will help, but not necessarily.
I've married two women like this. 1st wife never sucked it up. Years later is finally getting therapy. 2nd wife sucked it up. Now is a year with the same job, we are a month away from being out of debt, and she has more joy about life than I've seen since the time I've met her. Often times being financial stuck makes the issue 100 times worse. So its best to paint a vision for this young lady of what could be and once she starts seeing the progress she will be on board.
The wife in this scenario sounds almost exactly like me. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and a few other mental issues, after ALOT of therapy and finding a good medication I have been much more stable in the workplace.
I don't know if I even know what job "fulfillment" means in and of itself. I don't hate my job and even enjoy it from time to time, but what brings me job-related fulfillment is that I have been able to use the money I make to support my family and up to an including post-secondary education for 4 kids. There are many ways to find "fulfillment". However, if she is expecting her social work clients to be grateful, I heard that may have happened once.
No one is going to like every aspect of their job, but people got to work and understand it is hard sometimes and every job has training and every job has crappy co-workers that are out of our control. Gotta have that get it done drive. Where has strong work ethic gone? That girl has no life experience. Life is hard. Love Dave's feedback-straight to it.
What has happened is work has gotten worse, and we get less for it. John Maynard Keynes’ prediction is looking wrong. We have become more and more like indentured servants every day. Our lives are basically bound to corporate overlords. It’s disturbing how people are ok with this
@ycook7000 lol say it takes two to tango then turn around and say this is on him. Straight foolish. You’re in the exact some boat as the person you are criticizing just on the opposite side. Zero self awareness
It can take up to a year to adapt to a new job and feeling like you got this. If your changing jobs every 6 months it's like starting all over again every time. This is an added layer of stress in itself. Learn to adapt and it can get easier to suck it up. It's okay to vent to your partner in reasonable ways. But you get up, and do what you got to do and make it your job to get better at it everyday. Maybe attempt to get to know your co workers, try to at least get along with them. You'd be surprised how much slack they will cut you if you try to get on their good side.
I just retired from the mental health field. Must of us never did well in math and had to work through our own issues to be effective therapists. She needs to work out her issues with her own therapist. She cannot effectively help others until this happens. Being a therapist can be tough because you may represent the person that your client has the issue with-transference. And clients can be cruel and you learn to develop a thick skin. I also worked with someone that retired and she never worked through her problems. She was a nightmare to everyone including herself. She could just never see it was her most of the time. Encourage your wife to get therapy before any decisions are made. A masters degree will be a minimum of 50k.
I have been considering becoming a mental health therapist. I’m thinking I could hypothetically get the masters for it in two more years of school (I have 4 years of college in other things, though related). What is some advice you might have for me in pursuing the education, and also knowing it’s there right career fit for me? (I am a married male)
I was once a social worker, even went back to school and got a masters. Working in mental is tough. If she’s overwhelmed right now, it’s not going to change as a clinician it will likely only intensify and she will have more debt. Clinical work is all about notes, documentation, systems, etc. I would tell her to explore other career paths before getting a masters.
Dave Ramsey's insights have been a game-changer for me! His practical approach to financial management has empowered me to take control of my money and work towards a debt-free life. The Total Money Makeover is my go-to guide, and I appreciate how he breaks down complex concepts into easy-to-follow steps.
his advice are pretty common sense tbh, nothing really special and i've watched a few to see what's all the hype. i have not found anything useful or helpful in his videos and he has also given really bad advice.
I don’t find fulfillment in my work. However, it pays well and it meets all of my practical needs. It funds my life that’s it. I fill my life with other things that make me happy, such as spending time with family, friends, hobbies, traveling etc. That is adulthood for most Americans. Sometimes passions don’t pay
It’s normal for a 23 years old to struggle with workplace environments and wanted to explore different jobs. She is indeed too young to be a mom and that could hold her back financially and career wise. I think Dave and Rachel made it sound like she’s crazy. She’s just young and still figuring out her path.
The husband was trying to paint her in a bad light - he clearly just wanted them to side with him so he could say "see, honey - even Ramsay thinks you shouldn't quit your job..."
Your gonna be fine, you can always forbearance the loans or do the income repayment plan. After baby she can go back to work. Ur in navy and i think have free child care and all those perks
What a great guy/partner. She is blessed to have such a special man. Wow! Blown away by his genuine heart. God bless their marriage and growing family.
What a patient and understanding, loving and supportive husband. He'll always carry her and anxieties if he doesn't stand ground more firm on responsibilities.
@@katiejon17 You put in the work and made the money for 15 years though. That's a different story from the lady here. She just got her degree, can't hold a job because she's unstable mentally or emotionally. If she becomes a stay at home mom now then that means that loan was nothing more than a WASTE. Sad.
Working during the first trimester is hard. You're so tired, the morning sickness, your brain is mush. I stopped working during my pregnancy. I just got back to work when my son was 3 and my daughter was 1 and a half.
I have worked social work for 40 years. Some of it’s rewarding but few and far between. Suck it up is right! Bottom line is it’s a job to provide and secondary to fulfillment. She need to not bail and work off that student debt before the baby comes.
“If Bob has a problem everywhere he goes, Bob IS the problem.” This woman doesn’t want “meaning and satisfaction” in her work. She wants glory. She doesn’t want to work her way up, she doesn’t want to learn. She feels entitled to just step into anything she wants. Someone taught her that’s how it works and now she’s in the world finding out that it doesn’t work that way. With a healthy mindset, you can find meaning in cleaning toilets. And if not, you find meaning on payday when you realize you can take care of your family. There’s no greater meaning than that.
@@intimacy2138 It make a lot of sense. She cannot handle someone being mean to her at work. SHe needs serious counseling. No way can she handle a child
Not everyone is the same. The only time I’ve ever had anyone be “mean to me” like that at work was when I was in customer service. I’ve never had employers or coworkers treat me like that. And I’ve been in the workforce…. 20 ish years. May depend on your field. I’m in education, special needs and non profit work. But, employers don’t treat people like that…. Because it’s inhumane. We are able to change jobs. This wasn’t a forever career.
I never wanted someone else raising my children so we lived on one income my husband was self-employed & we had to scrimp & be as frugal as we could we drove used cars, cooked 90% of meals at home bought good clothes at Goodwill & Consignment Shops except for shoes & lived on the tightest budget we could so maybe he needs to show her the tight budget they will be living on if she stops work now & then she can stay home when the baby comes!
Most of us don’t like our jobs. It’s a means to an end. Most of us suck it up until something better comes along. This woman is still young and a little immature. She wants to stay home and do nothing
I had a baby at 23 also, I remember it was a scary time not feeling completely ready and just finishing college, having debt, etc.. but God helped us through, He never leaves us. Having a baby will definitely be a full time job, and there is such a need for moms being there for their kiddos. Everything works out in the end, trust in God, He is faithful 😊
I’ve been working since I was 15, I’m 36 now, and I haven’t found meaning in my work in my entire life. I recognize it for what it is, a means to provide. Find meaning somewhere else.
Yea having a job that has meaning is a joke it's basically like going to jail for 10 hours a day
Yes working for a wage rather than to just directly provide for your own basic needs will pretty much always feel meaningless. When I'm splitting firewood I feel that it has more meaning than when I'm slugging through paperwork & engineering dwgs or updating databases even though that pays much more money than I can make chopping my own firewood.
I totally agree! Some look for validation from doing a good job at work. I dont hate or discpize my work I just dont feel any worse or better after doing it lol
Thanks you for saying that Warren.
And if you can find ‘meaning’ in your work, that is the icing on the cake and not the goal. The goal is to provide your employer with someone who is dependable and that is justified in his wages.
All this mental babble that young people are buying into means eventually there will be no one to build a house or apts;
No one to cook & teach in schools.
The future is bleak.
Exactly
I was taught you don't quit a job until you have a job to replace it.
@TheR3alRyan It's always smart to have a job replacement before quitting a job. Employers are not as inclined to hire someone who is not employed. And you can't predict whether someone will hire you in whatever time frame your finances can handle. That being said, you don't have to stay in your miserable job forever but you do need to have a new job before you leave your miserable job.
I teach that to my students but I also told them that once I broke this rule due to two twiddle Dee and dumb bosses. Even you won't be able to handle it.
More to life than work..
@YoungnFly09 yes,there is,but you gotta pay the bills. You can't rely on someone else to pay your way,but you can find a good ballance.
@TheR3alRyan everyone does not have money to take 3-4 months off. Thats not a toxic mentality it’s a survival mentality
My brother used to do that, quit his jobs when somebody does something he doesn't like. Did that until he was 50 years old then finally woke up when family members stopped letting him borrow money.
Amazing how fast people grow up when there are no enablers around.
There are always things at work or people you don't like, part of being an adult is sucking it up!
Sounds like someone I know well
She has a history of getting fired and quitting jobs. She can't handle her jobs and gets easily frustrated. She has trouble getting along with people at her jobs. These are not qualities of a good therapist.
My experience is that clinical therapy is the blind leading the blind, so she sounds perfect for the job
💯 percent facts 👍🏽🎉
Not just that but a quality, functional member of society.
Yeahhhhh seems like often shrinks and counselors and such enter those fields to try and better understand themselves.... which doesn't work and is way more expensive than simply going and getting counseling. Lol
@@joelplatt2651Agree.
I was a single mother for 17 years....worked several jobs to make ends meet. Met my husband 9 years ago and I continued working until he asked me to be a stay at home wife. We sold our large home, bought a small home and paid it off, sold our second vehicle to only have one payment and now we can live off of one income. My kids are already 26, 23 and 17 now but it takes a lot of hard work to make sure you and your kids have everything they need. If you want to live off of one income you have to he prepared to sacrifice a lot of wants. I cook most meals here at home, we don't go on extravagant vacations. It's doable but you have to learn to be very frugal.
So you met a voluntary cuck?
I'm always surprised why a man would take on someone else's children... what's the psychology of that? anyone?
@@annasimons389 I've heard that a lot of men have a hero complex, which causes some of them to see single moms as vulnerable and in need of help. It triggers the protective instinct in some men, even if they never thought they could seriously consider a single mom before. They can make a man feel useful or needed. Also, some people become a better, more beautiful person after becoming a parent, and others are drawn to that.
interesting... because as a woman I want nothing to do with someone else's kids. @@user-mf9yl2pf3v
Excuse me if this is off-topic, but why is your username "Sarita"?
My ex was constantly doing this, wouldn’t take a job unless it filled his soul. After he left us, he was unemployed for 10 months and it was always somehow my fault. 😂 Luckily, I earned enough to just get by and provide for my family but with small children and childcare it was very stressful. But I did it and I’m proud of me. I agree you have to find your “career” satisfying but a job is to pay the bills, especially when you have a family to provide for.
As I tell my wife I'm a psychologist for 95% of my day and I do eye exams (I'm actually an optometrist). Healthcare is not for the faint of heart if you're not emotionally stable. If his wife just wants to be a stay at home wife then help clear the debt in 2 years and then stay home with the kids. No shame in that.
Believe me , the pattern is that she can’t handle any stress. She will not like being house wife either.
Exactly!!
The majority of quality "psychologists" I've met have actually been medical doctors.
@@hhf4312flawed, you clearly aren’t a woman or don’t have kids. Being pregnant takes a lot out of a woman especially the first couple of months it’s emotional wreck. He is in the military it’s ok for her to focus on the family first then help clear some debt when the child gets older.
@@Trysaratop She was like this way before she was pregnant! The pregnancy just amplified her lack of coping ability. She's in the wrong field. I've been in health care as a Respiratory Therapist for 30 years, retired now, and dealing with challenging people is not for very many people.
“I own this place and I hate this place sometimes”That had me laughing so hard. True insight from Dave. Life is full of contrast. Embrace it and fall forward.
Crypto scammer
Work is work.
This was the best comment ever!
So sick to hear all the time that this person has anxiety, this person has anxiety - as excuses for not dealing with life. At this time in our country with all that is going on here and around the world - we are ALL anxious! Deal with it and get on with taking care of your family!
I hear that term all the time, and nobody can tell me what it is. 'I have anxiety.' Yes, don't we all? We need it to function as a human being. Even animals have it and need it. It wouldn't be good if you didn't have anxiety. You'd be the worst psychopath of all times. It's different if you have pathological, unreasonable fears, like phobias, but that's not what they mean by anxiety. So... what is it?
Common feelings that are part of everyone’s life (e.g. anxiety, grief) are now labeled as mental illness. I’ve heard other people use anxiety as an excuse to avoid work.
Imagine having over 50k in student loans and not even making $15 an hour.
Imagine even more than that, thinking if you sink yourself even further into debt and get a bigger degree that it will be worth it. I'm 31 and I see this with more and more friends everyday. They're not satisfied with their income (lifestyle creep) so they get more degrees and it just keeps perpetuating
@@samanthat7553 yea but 15 an hour full time is not enough to live alone in todays world.
She is only 23 and has a husband. She will be fine. Unless he divorces her, which he probably eventually will.
I don't need to. That was most of my adult life. Only been making more than that for about a year. I also owe 15k more than them.
The lie that we've been sold on higher education. I am so thankful someone gifted me FPU a couple of years ago, or my life would look so different now.
Edited for typos.
Just crazy… social workers can make 80k easy.
Oh, I used to have her problems...that until I realized I WAS THE PROBLEM. Once I changed my mind set, started developing the actual skills required to perform my job (social ones included, which turns out to be quite important), and understanding why I am being paid and how hard it is to keep a business run, lots of things changed for me and actually I really started to develop my career at that point.
Good for you! Proud of you!
I am saving your post, Nickles. It is very inspirational and instructional. Congratulations.
A lot of people love to hire women with big dreams to abuse them and feel better about being a middle manager somewhere. But I agree for the social skills, I got let go from an internship once for asking too many questions, and people felt bad about not having answers. I know it wasn't performance related because the other division we worked for had me come back to present because my report was the best one they had seen in 10 years.
Absolutely right. When I changed my attitude and my outlook on life, work, etc things improved. If I wasn’t successful, I was the catalyst and no one else.
Excellent comment. Extreme ownership.
I've told my children repeatedly that they'll rarely find fulfillment in employment. Fulfillment comes from spending time with your family, church, friends.
Great advice
Yep. You need contentment in work not fulfillment
Working at a job where you’re miserable is not what I want to do if that’s what you’re implying.
Why is it bad to want fulfillment at a job where you’re happy and feel like you’re making a difference? The people in these comments are a stick in the mud
@@musicandpoetry_8 You can enjoy your work for sure, It's more of finding a Job that you can be content with and not hate it. If you can find a fulfilling job by all means go for it but no job is perfect.
Very few 23 year olds have the emotional maturity, life experience and wisdom to effectively counsel others, and that’s without taking unresolved issues into consideration. Not to mention, the therapy fields teach students to be mindful of their own impairment so as to protect their clients from further harm-it’s even written into their code of ethics.
I admire this woman’s desire to help others, but she needs a hard reset on her priorities: self-care, basic responsibilities, then purpose and meaning.
She's so young. She should focus on therapy for herself and being a mom. There's plenty of time after she figures out her own issues and raises the kid to school age to finish her degree and find a meaningful career.
And now she will be a mom at 23 more stress
This is an example of why 23 is too young to get married and have kids for many people. Go live your life, make mistakes, come back and get married in 5 more years.
FACTS 👌!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@@davidhale4647
At 13 I was trying to get a job 😂
By college years was doing so many temp jobs that it lead to my first permante job at age 23 and I kept it for nearly 15yrs before I moved on to the next. Every interview I been on they were shocked I kept a job for so long. I didn’t understand them at all. But for the position it worked in my favor because it showed loooong term commitment.
If his wife keeps bouncing around, she will become unemployable. Employers want commitment on some level.
She’s better off creating her career that fits what ever it is she is searching for.
So I don’t know I guess as they say everyone is different.
She's a 23 year old emotionally volatile teenager right now. She needs to mature and catch up with her current situation.
Agreed. Get counseling for her issues too.
Yikes she is pregnant also
Teenagehood ends at 19
Social worker, she must be so stressed. I was a teacher aide for an elementary school. And the children are so broken, and have so many issues, at such a young age. There's only so much you can do to help them.
She might have _Asperger’s;_ such individuals rarely function without meaning in their work. She should avoid jobs where there’s small talk, formalities & red tape. Sounds like me before I knew
I have a friend the same way. She earns north of $150K, and has lax responsibilities. She wants to leave because she doesn’t feel fulfilled. I recommended she find fulfillment in her children, not her job. This is not an economy to job hop.
Show her the Bible verse...
Colossians 3:23 NIV
[23] Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,
Implementing this changed EVERYTHING for me because giving up a $150k job? Yikes!! Noooo!😅
Why should you work for the lord? You work to live.
Tell her to get a job serving tables, she’ll make WAY more than $30k. I served tables my entire 10 years of my 20s and tbh it was the most rewarding job I’ve ever had. I love talking to people and helping them and that job made me feel very very rewarded. I felt like a psychologist with my tables sometimes
I don't know if she will be able to keep an active job where she has to stay up for long if she's already pregnant.
@@susiem.2068 Working one day and taking two off to rest is very do-able. Just have to work part time.
She has anxiety-that line of work will be torture for her.
I gave the same advice. Work, it does not have to be in your college major. Teach substitute school.
I make $17 an hour at a grocery store. It's one of many part time jobs I have. That actually comes to $13 an hour so I wonder if she's part time or something.
As a licensed social worker and independently licensed therapist, I cant tell you how many peers went into this field to fix themselves. But front that its to help others. This guy’s wife needs to sort out her own issues. She is going to project all that on her baby and future clients if she even gets that far in her career.
That’s what I was thinking!!!!
I totally agree with what you said.
This guy needs to say no to the extra degree. That’s just more money down the drain with no roi. He should find her a good counselor and let her be a stay at home mom.
This happens over and over. Women get these degrees and become psychologists and then drop out of the field. There is actually a shortage at the moment. Personally I think that’s because women dominate the field but can’t handle it emotionally and leave. Men a discouraged from entering because it’s portrayed as a “women’s” job. So you get high turnover and shortages.
But this guy needs that drain on the family income like a hole in the head. Just say NO!
@@jameshetu6885I agree with what you stated about the field being dominated by women (which isn't always good). I recently obtained my addiction counselors degree with hopes to move up soon once I have my certification. However, the field encourages counselors and therapist to have their own while in the field to balance all the emotions they take on talking to people.
I work in Adult Protection Services for the country. I about spit my coffee out when i heard she sat around for a MONTH "waiting for a phone call" that led to an irreversible action. That girl needs to start working at McDonald's to learn some basic leadership skills first before trying to "help" people's pyche.
Honestly I loved working at McDonald’s when I did 😂 it’s a very low stress job and they pay decent with benefits
What country are you from? I’m not aware that the United States has an adult protection services department. I could be wrong.
@@susannovak8263 From the USA. Most of my cases are adults who are a danger to themselves and/or neglected by their caregivers- usually adult children or spouses who neglects the client. Other times they have no family and need assistance to handle their cares. We network with other facilities and so "waiting a month for a phones" is unacceptable.
@@susannovak8263every state has its own adult services department. It's comparable to the children's services department. They mostly handle the elderly and the physically and mentally handicapped.
It’s so weird listening to this because my husband practically begged me to leave my toxic job I had been at for over 12 years and I had the hardest time letting go because they had a great 401k contribution and other good benefits. I finally pulled the plug and found a new job with a fresh start but I felt like a failure quitting after almost 13 years!
12 yrs is not the same as 6 months. In your case your job was likely the issue and you shouldn't be ashamed..you tried for 12 yrs!! But lets be honest..SHE is the issue here not her job. 6 months and still training on the computer(at 23, I'm 30 and we were taught basic computer skills in school including the Microsoft suite) her Co workers aren't mean they are annoyed that her mess ups make more work for them. And her track record of bouncing from job to job is a clear indicator that she is the problem. All workplaces have their own issues..you deal with it and move on when you get a better offer. Also she has over 50k in debt but is making only 30k per year and wants to quit this job again despite not knowing if she will find another or even if she wants to work elsewhere...if she wasn't married she'd be drowing.
It's literally not the same situation. She's a quitter
She's in heavy debt. And who is going to pay for it? Him? I got pregnant in a similar situation and sucked it up and worked.
Don't have unprotected sex when you need to work. She honestly sounds manipulative. There's no comparison.
I hear you!!
😮😮😮I left a company after 24 years due to an extremely toxic work environment. Sooooo many of my coworkers died at in their 40s/50s and early 60s. I'm convinced it was due to the poisonous atmosphere and heavy workload. The company had VERY good benefits and great pay but what good would that do me if I'm 6 ft under??? I found a job that pays much less but I'm not constantly on edge and the workload is a piece of cake. There are regrets I have about leaving the other job but I have to remind myself of how unhappy I was. It was like a black cloud following me around 24/7. I no longer have that black cloud. I was ALWAYS worried about getting fired because it was soooo hard keeping up with the work.
She’s gonna want to be a stay at home mom…I already see this coming everything financially will be on him soon
Divorce will occur
Nothing wrong with that! You men are sick in the head not wanting to work and provide for your family. A woman home can safe a ton of money and in many cases is way better for the family
Hes a man who has to have his wife work? Yall can't provide then complain when you have to.
Men generally should expect that if they are married and they are having sex with their wives unprotected that she possibly will conceive their child!
That is something that men need to factor in before they get their wives pregnant!
Its life and it happens in case you didn't know that!
Ridiculous!
@@alqoshgirl you're delusional
I relate to her. I worked 3 jobs in 2023 and when it got hard I dipped. I am now working a job that does take a bit of a mental toll on me because I get mentally drained and exhausted however I am sticking to it until its been over a year to bounce and find another job. I do therapy and do things outside of work that keep me mentally sane. It is not easy, coming from someone who quit 3 jobs within half a year but I am 26 not a child anymore therefore I had to stop with the victim mind set and suck it up. Also get in mind that I worked a job for over 2 years right after undergrad so life is a roller coaster.
All of her clients when she's a therapist: "Things are getting hard. "
Her: "Just quit"
😆🏃
😂😂😂
😂
haha
😂😂😂😂😂
She doesn't handle anxiety well? Boy, is SHE in for a rude awakening when that baby shows up. 👶
Raising children is in women’s nature. They were not made to slave away at the widget factory. It’s demonic that weak men for their wife to go serve another man.
For sure!
She's likely hormonal and emotional because she's pregnant and... a woman. She may be far better at home doing what women were physically designed by God to do. Dave is telling her to suck it up as a 23 year old pregnant woman? The first thing I thought was she needs to go home and stay home to raise her child. For many women that will bring fulfillment above and beyond a career. She wants to help people? She can help her own family. Why is the default to boot the wife and mother out of the house to make an income? That's nowhere in the Bible.
Titus 2:4-5 KJV
4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
1 Timothy 5:14 KJV - I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.
She not gonna work period post partum
@@Kim-bv3xn
I wonder why people are so opposed to the idea of mother staying home with her own child?
Dave Ramsey has said that his wife was at home raising their children while he was working, but when there are callers that suggest such a thing he tells them to get to work.
LIFE is challenging. My siblings and I took on adult responsibilities at a very young age due to my parents being ill and unable to work. If we didn't work we didn't eat ect. Nothing in a workplace could compare to it, that made us stronger and the ability to take a bullet or two.
Almost all of us have been abused at a job, and I'm no exception to this. Now that I've been in the work force for nearly 30 years, I'm firmer with people and won't allow them to treat me that way at the place I work. The vast majority of the people I work with are kind and caring, but sometimes there might be one or two people who give me a hard time.
True no perfect job
The only consolation is that they are deeply unhappy people and if you stand back and watch them you will notice that they are horrible to everyone.
The types of people wanting to become a psychologist is alarming
The lunatics are running the asylum.
and they all usually got major mental problems themselves😂
@@thanosianthemadtitanic and they have therapists themselves
@@carolynmurphy3697 therapyception
Just like ex addicts wanting to be rehab therapists. I always hear people praising those types.
What a great husband. So responsible and caring
She doesn't deserve him
And married to a mental case.
He needs to tell her to stick with that job until the baby comes. Then pay down as much debt as possible. Compound interest is going to destroy her.
“I own this place and sometimes I hate it” should have been the title for this video.
She’s wanting to help people but needs help herself.
Sounds like she is just lazy.
That’s why she got pregnant right around the time she started to hate her job. Darn, time to be a stay at home mom!
Most therapists lol
That's why they usually pick that job title.
Exactly. Put the oxygen mask on yourself before helping others...
"When the wind blows, she storms out of the room" - this is exactly what my husband is like. He recently got promoted and it didn't take long for him to realize that as we get paid more, it's expected that the work gets tougher too. I also got recently promoted and I have always been the major earner between us.. Sometimes, I feel like he sees this as his easy ticket way out of being responsible. We have 2 small kids ages 10 and below. His 1st work anniversary was 4 months ago and this is his 1st job after a 2.5 year-long hiatus. Aside from that, his parents are extremely financially unwise and practically live off their kids' support - no retirement plan planned whatsoever. I am based in the Philippines, but I think problems such as this cross race, location and scenarios but the root cause is mainly the same - fear of responsibility.
Smh
First jobs are tough because it's when you learn that bosses and coworkers can be awful. Accepting that it will likely be the same everywhere is the key to managing a career. Let things roll off, don't react to annoyances, etc. Make a game out of being overly nice to people who suck. Fighting the system will bring misery. Spare your emotional energy for people in your life who matter.
Sounds like this girl isn't cut out for social work. No worries, most of us have no clue about a career at age 23. A bachelor's or master's degree in psychology, whatever she has, can be useful in more analytic careers like clinical research.
Agreed. That's why I am so glad I work remote now. It's easier to deal with that stuff when you are not physically near it.
If your life experience is that way then that just means you were sheltered and didn't have a clue as to how life worked until you thrown into the thick of it. These are the snowflake types they talk a lot about on this show.
💯
@@littlesongbird1Dave Ramsey wouldn't like you working from home 😂
@@chicanoazteca8614ah yes, It's easy just to throw insults
We are a 6 figure income couple and had very little saved and not much cash lying around the preverbal".
'...don't have $500 for an
emergency" that was us. The big thing was debt all kinds of it, cars mortgage (although our home isn't a high price one), student loans for our kids, and of course credit cards.
One day we just got sick of being broke and went total scorched earth and became frugal overnight. Paid it all off, it took almost 5 years but now we have no debt and this year our savings rate is 50% on basically the same income that had us perpetually broke. So for us it is mainly staying out of debt and watching our spending, at first it was a real effort to save in our HISA and 401Ks but now it's actually fun watching our money grow. No car or vacation or neighborhood is worth being broke or financially unstable.
Congratulations on taking the steps necessary to get yourself out of the financial bind you were in.
Taking your medicine can be tough. But in the end, if you are committed, you will end up in a very satisfactory position.
It's all about what you're willing to do.
Samuel Peter Descovich that's whom I work with
I believe everyone could benefit from having a personal financial advisor. They can assist you in reaching your customized financial objectives at any point, ensuring you remain profitable.
You can glance his name up on the internet and verify him yourself. he has years of financial market experience...‹>
Success depends on the actions or steps you take to achieve it. Building wealth involves developing good habits like regularly putting money away in intervals for solid investments. Financial management is a crucial topic that most tend to shy away from, and ends up haunting them in the near future.., I pray that anyone who reads this will be successful in life!
Starting early is simply the best way of getting ahead to build wealth , investing remains a priority. I learnt from my last year's experience , I am able to build a suitable life because I invested early ahead this time.
Exactly. That's my major concern and what kind of profitable business or investment can someone do with the current rise in economic downturn
I have been investing in stocks for over 3 years now and I have made nothing less that $400k in ROI. My portfolio has grown exponentially. Will advise you consider stocks inveestment.
I find this interesting. Could you please provide me with the means to get in touch with your Adviser? I am concerned about my dwindling portfolio.
”Michelle Christine Parker” is the lady's name. I first saw her on a goldman sachs' report, then on Smart Advisors, and immediately looked her up on the internet; it was the best decision I've made to stay afloat in these crazy times. She has been outstanding.
Entry level social work jobs are incredibly intense emotionally, really rough, families with so many problems. It's a job for the few who can handle it. Really, give the woman a break. My daughter does that work at age 23 and after 2 years she's already burnt out, and she LOVES the work. It's hard.
I agree!
I do not agree! She needs to read the book "I never promised you a rose garden!" Suck it up!
@@wilhoit haha, but also, we have no other context here, and she never said she wouldn't get a new job. I don't see anything wrong with changing jobs as long as it's not lower paying.
I had an internship with the county humane services. Those social workers always showed up to the meetings looking stressed out and complaining about lack of resources. It’s not a job for everyone
I hear nightmares about that field, I don’t think the comment section gets it especially after she got the degree and expected to like it
Worked all my life, started babysitting at 14. I am a social worker, it's a thankless job. But never once thought about not working. Bills still need paid.
nice job Lisa. Do you want a star sticker or something?
How can she feel or be happy when she's very irresponsible and leaves every job or gets fired. Thats a major red flag🚩
She’s still young and finding her way through life. She needs grace and support, not criticism.
@@rebeccaoprea9917 Go help her.
She's only 23. She should focus on therapy for herself and being a mom. There's plenty of time after she figures out her own issues and raises the kid to school age to finish her degree and find a meaningful career.
And now baby coming yikes
You a women hu??
So, I literally love my job. I'm a roller coaster mechanic, I graduated from college as an an interior designer. When I graduated, I was like, I wanna work in rides because I love them. Here we are, I've been a roller coaster mechanic for 18 years❤
You sound rad. Good for you girl.
That’s cool. Who’d have thought that the one job that doesn’t have its ups and downs is in roller coasters.
That sounds like an awesome job!
@@thomaslastname3070 all the time!
My wife always wanted to quit her job for 2 years so I can somewhat relate. But the thing was she didn't want me to work 2 jobs, I told her that was the only way to survive. At least 90% of people hate their jobs, it's never about loving what you do, its about working to be able to do what you love to do. Thats just how life is whether you like it or not.
This is correct! If one wins the lottery or has enough money to live. I bet most likely they will travel and quit his or her job. Working is just to earn money. If you have enough money to live until you retire without working. Would you still want to work fulltime?
@@LoveLife-oo9czno
I was an RN at 21. There were days I would have quit like every day. You have to deal with it/ life.
You got my respect. You see crazy everyday
@@sbeasley7100 I probably would. Very fluid if you don’t like one area you can move to another. I’ve been in some terrible working conditions and there are rude and mean patients but I’ve saved lives and helped a lot of people for sure. It’s not for the faint of heart us need some grit. lol.
Ps I’m still working ! 35 years now
@@sbeasley7100 you have to have tough skin. If patients are mean to you and you take it personally, don’t be a nurse.
It seems like we are going more towards indentured servitude/serfdom than progress.
People are working more and getting less. And the nature of the work is getting worse. Acceptance of this is what leads to work continuing to get worse
Why do we not demand better from our workplaces? Don’t work for places that don’t respect you
The wife sounds very immature. He messed up getting her pregnant. You effed up, dude. When Dave says "and she wants to be a psychologist!?" and the husband laughs, you know it's because he knows it's ridiculous.
Wow! I just fell off my chair. Dave didn't take the wife's side.
She did that on purpose so she wouldn’t have to work
Also, she want's to go another $50k into debt for a masters. She has daddy issues, and cannot retain a job. The timing of the pregnancy also just happens as she is unhappy in her current position. This dude is in for a lifetime of hurt.
Agree
This is why you don’t get married and have kids at 23. Of course she’s immature. I was still a dumb ass kid at 23!
At 23 years old, it's probably wise for someone to live alone independently, in order to realize how important keeping a job truly is or else your lights get turned off or you can't afford that tuna sandwich at the deli 😂 That taught me very quick.
I know everyone is hard on her. Be mindful 23 is still young and she’s still figuring out what she wants to do. I did social work for 5 years and left (found another job first). My job wasn’t that bad but there are much worse out there which is why I didn’t go searching for a different SW job. And the pay isn’t great. You need a Masters for a decent pay job. It’s true that you go into the field to help people but often people don’t want the help. She may need to leave the field all together and then maybe she’d stop job hopping. Or maybe she does have deeper issues of getting along with others so it won’t change. With the little information we have it’s hard to judge that for certain.
Very few people actually like everything about their job. That’s why it’s called work. There were many stressful times during my 41 year career but I had 5 people depending on me for their existence so I sucked it up.
Yeah, I thought that way as well but then I sucked it up and made a change
For sure. Especially the first job. Graduated at 21, really struggled. 25 now, it’s much easier.
We are indentured servants
@@WoodyJ98thank you sir; may I have another.
Yes wise mans go M.G.T.O.W. ✊ ✊ 👊 Now
I’m a social worker and I don’t always feel meaning in my work but overall I do. No one can feel meaning 100% of the time at their job.
This Bible verse changed my perspective at work and actually made things bearable...
Colossians 3:23 NIV
[23] Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,
I understand that but people are saying they don’t ever feel fulfillment at their jobs, unless it’s a pretty easy job, that sounds miserable
She doesn't want to work
She wants to go buy baby clothes and have lunch with her pals daily.
He married a kid. At 23 and pregnant, she has you roped in. Plan on getting a 2nd job because this PG honey wants to be a mommy and have you foot the bill. Forever.
Yep. Seen that movie a million times. You'd be amazed how many of these women get a Masters Degree with tons of debt, many never even work in their field of study, than end up finding some simp (like this guy) who works himself to death to support her and the kids.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. These fools want to get marry and be broke
Here's some great financial advice from me, don't get married. Your welcome
It's irresponsible of him to impreggnate her when he knows that they can't afford a baby. They're both irresponsible.
@@jennpul1015 I think many of us were unplanned and by unresponsible people decades ago. I just have trouble visualizing a young man and woman sitting around with coffee and then planning a conception. Nope, usually hot pants after drinks. Your thoughts!
At the same time you have to find a job that fits you and supports you emotionally and physically and all aspects. I had a job as a first year teacher and I lost weight, I cried everyday, and I was extremely depressed. I stayed for the year and knew that I had to find something else to do. I think she could try to see a career counselor but again she’s only 23. It’s hard and a lot of pressure to know what career you’d want to do for the rest of your life at 23… it sounds like her husband is supportive and does want to help her. All I’m saying is that it’s easy to judge others but if you’ve never been in a toxic work environment then you don’t understand.
The meaning in your work is a paycheck. Everything else is bonus
Exactly. Especially, when she has a debt of $57K.
You’re not working the right job then
I’ve worked in some toxic office environments just to be able to look after my family. It’s always worth playing the long game.
just to add another perspective, social work is such a hard job. it burns you out so fast. people go into social work to help people but it winds up consuming the person trying to help.
It’s hard but how hard is it to figure that out? If you’re taking out a loan to study it, doing basic “would I even like this sort of work” thinking is very much required. It always gets me. Teachers go in having no idea what teaching in a public school is actually like, then graduate, try it out, hate it and quit.
@@TheresaReichley A people have to work and B don't know much without trying it. Not a simple search for so many jobs... For example it is ;likely easier to run a concentration camp than a formal prison with rules.... Work is likely very similar....
If you are not cut out for a career, do research and homework first. Most of us just have to work but there are other work choices. Don’t keep going down the same old rabbit hole. Mary
@@marvinthomason8540 It's very hard to understand what a particular job is like when you're only 17 and don't know anything about the branch or work in general. Then you get an education and you like it, but after 3 years you find out you're not really up for most jobs. What are you supposed to do then? Not finish your education? You don't have many options in that situation. The only thing you can do really is get to work anyway, and hope you can slowly create a situation that's better, or maybe educate yourself towards something different.
My wife also has a tendency to quit her jobs and I think she is about to do it again.
She was a full time mom and started working when the boys moved out 10 years ago.
She has had 4 jobs in the 10 years and quit everyone because she did not like how she was being treated.
There was a 2 year period where she did not work at all.
I tried to explain to her that I cannot just quit because I was not invited to a meeting or my boss did not take my advice.
In general some women do not understand how much pressure it is for men who have to work no matter what to provide for the family.
We have been married 40 years and we love each other but this is one area that causes me pain in our relationship.
Our plan is for me to retire in June 2024 and to put 100% of her income into a fund to remodel our Kitchen.
It is going to be hard to convince her not to quit because her boss is quitting (her best work friend) and her sister is in the hospital in another state.
So I will need to tread lightly on the subject.
Kids are grown so child support is no longer in the picture.
Stay at home mother's for years get in the habit of having the husband's income as a safety net
That's why mother's should always at least work or do something once children are at school
@@ykook7000 I think you are right and would add that stay at home mothers are in charge of the family.
Once they get a job they are not in charge and if people at work do not do it their way they get frustrated and quit.
I'm an old female so what do I know but have you actually said to her that you feel it's not fair on an emotional level? Your retirement is only 7 months away and she can't wait that long? So be it - no kitchen renovation if she doesn't continue to work .
@@curiouscat3384 if a man said anything to a woman about emotions he's gonna be laughed out of the relationship lol
I know this sounds harsh but i wouldn't want to have a baby with someone who first thought when she has something go wrong at her job is to just quit. Adults have responsibilities and bills dont pay themselves, children do what they want, good luck to you buddi your in for a long road of being the sole provider, sounds like a road to resentment to me
She will be a stay at home mom while he works himself to death. If the divorce come the system will reward her with his pension, assets, alimony and child support.
Unlike women, men don't have a choice. He messed up.
Adults are indentured servants in America.
We just work so that the problems don’t apply to us
Thank you! And she wants to go into more debt... but she doesn't have a plan to pay off the first degree...
I'm actually diagnosed and medicated for both general and social anxiety. My anxiety actually makes me want to stay with my job because it's my comfort zone, it's what I'm familiar with and what I know. I don't know how some people can bounce around from job to job, just the thought of that almost gives me an anxiety attack. 😂
That is great! you got help for what you needed and that is a huge accomplishment.,
She has to think of the bigger picture, like needing health insurance throughout her pregnancy. It’s usually a lot more affordable to cover yourself with your own employer plan, than it is to be added to a spouse’s plan. You also typically have to be at your job for a year before you can access any maternity leave or short-term disability benefits. If she bounces to a new job right now, she won’t have that by the time she delivers.
He works for the Navy! You and I are paying her health insurance.
@@semosancus5506 And you get the peace of mind of not having another country’s military rolling down the street enforcing their laws.
@@semosancus5506 Oh true, I forgot he said that!
@@trainsandlocomotivesyea and if that ever happens he would have to fight as a man. Look at the men of Ukraine.
@@kbthegoat824 facts
The more the caller describes his wife, the more red flags I hear! I wish him well and good fortune in the years to come.
I quit my job when my third baby was born… it was impulse. Going back to work was too hard. My husband just hugged me and told me congratulations. We made it work and I’m so thankful that my husband supported me during that time.
Thats exactly where I am right now. We just had our third and I'm a social worker and the work is too mentally and emotionally hard 12 years in... I'd rather do more part jobs now!
Same here. I’m an RN and still have not returned to work as my third has turned one year old this month. We are making one income work and I would love to go back to work. However, the only option I have is to work weekends given the nature of nursing shifts. I would love to find work that doesn’t require me to sacrifice sleep and perform logistical acrobatics to get my kids taken care of while I’m away
@@jessicab6876 When my third turned 6 months-old I started working part time and remote to make the budget stretch a bit more. It was a great balance for me and let me stay close to my babies when I felt they still really needed me. I hope you found something too!
@@somethingsaboutmary3134 I heard some nurses get a full-time salary just being on-call over night? I think one woman told me she works once per month. She just has to have her family on the ready to step in and watch the kids if needed. Is that still a thing?
I would think paying for daycare might make working prohibitive.
Life ain't all sunshine and rainbows. Too many people act as if they believe they're never supposed to be uncomfortable... As if a good life is a default position you never have to work for. Seems to be a recurring theme.
As a social worker I am cursed on a daily basis. It's part of the job. It is known as an abrasive field. We represent the establishment... it's nothing personal.
The problem is that young people need to learn how to deal with difficult people/conflicts. Regardless of what happens in life, she needs to learn to deal with problems. This is coming from someone who couldn't handle a customer being upset and little things when I entered the workforce at 22 because I was coddled a bit. If you can't handle minor inconveniences, you need to practice it. Life will throw you problems and you need to be able to handle them. It's part of growing up. Dave's advice is spot on.
no Dave is Dave but everyone is not going to be able to "handle" problems.... people are too different
@@donaldlyons17Well, if people can't "handle problems" then what? What do YOU suggest??
Emotional maturity and emotional intelligence are key qualities for social workers.
I definitely sucked it up at the age of 19 when my husband and I married and we also lived in an economically depressed area, which didn’t have a lot of job openings. So, I worked at a factory making men’s shirts for 7 years.
I agree, she needs to suck it up. You simply have to do what you can in order for better opportunities in the job market.
My ex-wife went through a ridiculous amount of jobs within a couple of years, claiming "stress" and "depression" were the causes of her quitting. Me, trying to be supportive but realistic, told her that we would make it financially BUT that's going to look like crap on a resume. Well, the "stress and depression" continued, even while unemployed and watching TikTok and screwing around on Snapchat during the day and doing NOTHING to help upkeep the house. The moral of the story is 1. No matter how stressed and depressed you get, you still have to make a living and 2. If you have someone willing to support you, don't bite the hand that feeds with lazy, self-entitled behavior. Dave is right. SUCK IT UP.
I worked for my parents for 13 years before quitting. I quit 2 jobs within a year, because I had no idea what I wanted to do. Each time I wondered if I was quitting because I was weak, or if it really was a bad fit. My current job I absolutely love! And quite frankly I don't regret taking those other jobs. It helped me progress a lot. But yes I agree most people who quit often is because it's too hard or their boss criticized them.
And honestly what made me realize I wasn't a quitter is when my boss completely chewed me out. I apologized, expressed how I messed up, how I would do better, and went back to work more determined. Lol it sounds weird but working under my parents seriously made me question my capabilities in the real world. I did make mistakes, I still make mistakes, but I am happy where I am at. Hard work is the best satisfaction. I can't even quite describe it. It sucks and is rewarding all at once. Lol and that is my rant.
As someone with ADHD and anxiety, sometimes what happens is that we have to mask in certain environments and the extra stress of that is extremely fatiguing. I have always been a very hard worker, but forcing myself to not listen to my body led to a full on burnout at 35. Close to an autistic burnout. It was very serious and I couldn’t work for about 6 months. The more I pushed, the more I regressed. It was horrible. I did recover. But the reason it happened was not listening to my body.
Many people need meaning in work (especially PDA types). Sometimes these people work best with entrepreneur type things or building up multiple streams of income. She also may just need to figure out which jobs suit her best. There are also some jobs that have toxic environments and it sounds like this particular job is one. I think if she builds up a side business before she quits or gets a new job before quitting, then she’s ok.
I think the “sucking it up” piece doesn’t work when someone hits a mental wall. Someone with experience with anxiety is the perfect person for psychologist. I like DR, but felt he really doesn’t have enough understanding of mental health issues to answer this one.
It’s the “make it or break it” mentality. Sure it’s great if you make it, but what about the people who break? Often pushing past our limit doesn’t lead us to a good long term goal. And the job she has now doesn’t sound good. Better to just get a different one where she can feel inspired, while also earning an income.
These comments make me super uncomfortable. Lots of ableist talk. I was healthy physically and mentally got the majority of my life. It’s the biggest privilege I ever took for granted.
The answer isn’t to push, it’s to figure out a strategy that works for you without damaging your health.
Landlord and bank doesn’t care your autistic. Do what you promised to do which is pay them. They are consequences if you don’t. This is coming from one who also is autistic. We are all worthless scum at the end of the day if we provide no value and not br someone someone else wants to work with.
There is no paradise or nirvana in this world. -Richard Sowell.
I've been "sucking it up" amongst toxic coworkers for the last seven years. The stress has led me to self-destructive behavior...so now I'm more in debt than ever. It turns out "sucking it up till I'm out of debt" was not a good plan.
I understand you. You're not crazy. Having a different personality than the comment section doesn't mean you're broken.
I see, so self-destructive behavior is your co-worker's fault.
@@therocinante3443 Everyone is responsible for their behavior and its consequences. I am. So are my coworkers. If you treat someone like crap and they spiral as a result of it, do you consider it not your problem? That's classic sociopath mentality.
I mean, you can not control others, but you have full control of your response. Pinning consequences of your actions to others seems tiring.
@@maylynbayani I never once blamed my actions on anyone else; that was your own un-analytical conclusion. By your view, if someone is abusive their victim should just bounce back all sunny, smiling and undamaged... and if they don't it's their own fault. If you walk down the same street every day and someone there always punches you in the face, you will bruise. You don't have control over whether or not you will bruise. You DO have control over whether you continue to walk past them or not. I believed "sucking it up" and staying on the same path for years was the right thing to do...but I kept bruising. I finally took a different path and left so the bruises could heal.
too many people coddled these days. he speaks the truth with toughen up.
If I quit every job I felt bad at I would have quit eleventy-hundred jobs by now, if I could even still find one. Companies don't hire you to be happy. They hire you to work, first and foremost. And on a secondary level, you'll probably have to be bored, or frustrated, or bump into unkind people who try to demean and/or undermine you routinely. You think you left junior high school behind when you graduated and entered the world of work? Congratulations, you just entered junior high school professionally. It is what it is. Make the best of it like a grown-ass man or woman.
My ex husband did this, hated every job he had, always quitting to go hide in another grad degree. When I was young, like the caller, i used to say oh no omg of course you should quit your job if you hate it and another degree would yes probably get you a higher paying or better job... 15 years of this. Eventually i flipped out on him, grow up!!! You can't afford to quit your job, you have two kids, bills, a car and student loans to pay off, shut up and suck it up like the rest of us!! Which of course made me the witch with a b which wasn't fair to me, plus I always had to pay for just about everything. Thus the "ex" status. And I will say what Dave and his daughter are too polite to say.... Your wife got pregnant to avoid work, TONS of women do this!! She will avoid ever going back to work for probably at least the next 18 years.
I respectfully disagree. She got pregnant to get out of working, but she will want to go back to work outside the home after a couple of years max because she'll find out what a thankless and difficult job it often is to be a SAHM. She strikes me as someone who will not be truly satisfied no matter where she goes or what she does.
You talk like she could get pregnant by herself. 🙄
I'm going through the same situation at home.
I'm done being the sole provider, caregiver, housekeeper and emotional punchbag.. Looking for a new place to live... wish me luck!
she didnt get pregnant by herself lol
@@marilynbartlett1850 SHe won't even be able to handle raising a child. She will be overwhelmed if she thinks her coworkers are too much for her, a kid will send her reeeling. He should be very worried.
To be honest, i relate to the wife. It’s not that I think what she does is right, because its not, but as someone who wasn’t allowed to get a job till I was 19, and someone who didn’t know how to drive till I was 21, work was the only life that I had outside of a toxic home life, so I didn’t stick it out as much. I also come to realize that some of the negative scenarios at work were due to an undiagnosed disorder that I’m just now learning about and learning how to cope with.
That last sentence is everything, thank you for saying that. I can relate.
I have the same problem as her! I can’t stay on a job more than a year the longest I stayed was 5 years! I’m currently working at Amazon Flex and work when I want to but fucccc I just want to find a job I love! 😢
She's doesn't want to work now, and she'll likely not work after having the kid. Very few people work in a field that makes them feel good all the time. It serves a purpose. For her, it's paying the student loans she racking up on a degree she likely won't use. He sounds like a very supportive husband who will soon become an ex-husband because "she's no longer happy" and call him a narcissist. Sounds like she's making it everyone else's job to make her feel good. Smh. I hope I'm wrong but this sounds utterly ridiculous and childish and I think he's trying his best to put her in a good light.
You hit the nail on the head. Definitely a future ex with this one. She's not able to put long-term goals over her immediate desire to feel good, which is essentially the mentality of a toddler.
The timing of the kid is also more than suspicious. These days you can, and should, try and plan when to get serious about having kids. She now gets the pregnancy as an excuse for not doing anything. Hope I am wrong, but he is likely in for a lifetime of hurt.
Of course, since he's military, she'll get all the cash and prizes. He's just a starter husband. Ramsey didn't give him anything useful.
Yupp. She's 23. If she's decent looking she will have the child then wait a bit, then leave him for a guy who can give her the resources financially she wants without having to work.
@@mpeugeot 🎰.....💰🏥👶👶👶🍔🌭🥪🍕🍟🍿🍹🍸🍷🛏️💊🛀💅🤳🤧🤒🤕✈️
What many people here do not seem to understand is that people go to professions like psychology from their own broken parts. It is because they understand the troubles, they want to help, but equally, they want to learn about themselves also. What is happening however, is that she has not gotten to the bottom of her own issues and perhaps a Masters will help, but not necessarily.
I've married two women like this.
1st wife never sucked it up. Years later is finally getting therapy.
2nd wife sucked it up. Now is a year with the same job, we are a month away from being out of debt, and she has more joy about life than I've seen since the time I've met her. Often times being financial stuck makes the issue 100 times worse. So its best to paint a vision for this young lady of what could be and once she starts seeing the progress she will be on board.
The wife in this scenario sounds almost exactly like me. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and a few other mental issues, after ALOT of therapy and finding a good medication I have been much more stable in the workplace.
I don't know if I even know what job "fulfillment" means in and of itself. I don't hate my job and even enjoy it from time to time, but what brings me job-related fulfillment is that I have been able to use the money I make to support my family and up to an including post-secondary education for 4 kids. There are many ways to find "fulfillment". However, if she is expecting her social work clients to be grateful, I heard that may have happened once.
you just seem b to want the money to do things.... or need it to do things IMO.
No one is going to like every aspect of their job, but people got to work and understand it is hard sometimes and every job has training and every job has crappy co-workers that are out of our control. Gotta have that get it done drive. Where has strong work ethic gone? That girl has no life experience. Life is hard. Love Dave's feedback-straight to it.
What has happened is work has gotten worse, and we get less for it.
John Maynard Keynes’ prediction is looking wrong. We have become more and more like indentured servants every day. Our lives are basically bound to corporate overlords.
It’s disturbing how people are ok with this
@@WoodyJ98 Right reward was part of working in the past while the benefits are fewer now
Nobody knows how hard it is to be a social worker. Especially in a long term care, it is insane.
He married a mess. Poor man. He’s realizing it now.
And can't do a thing about it if the kid is his.
Omg stop acting like men are being held hostage!
Takes 2 to tango
He shouldn't have asked her to get married then or got her pregnant
This is on him!
lmao 0 self accountability in women these days. @@ykook7000
@@ykook7000 must not be familiar with family law court systems.
@ycook7000 lol say it takes two to tango then turn around and say this is on him. Straight foolish. You’re in the exact some boat as the person you are criticizing just on the opposite side. Zero self awareness
It can take up to a year to adapt to a new job and feeling like you got this. If your changing jobs every 6 months it's like starting all over again every time. This is an added layer of stress in itself. Learn to adapt and it can get easier to suck it up. It's okay to vent to your partner in reasonable ways. But you get up, and do what you got to do and make it your job to get better at it everyday. Maybe attempt to get to know your co workers, try to at least get along with them. You'd be surprised how much slack they will cut you if you try to get on their good side.
I just retired from the mental health field. Must of us never did well in math and had to work through our own issues to be effective therapists. She needs to work out her issues with her own therapist. She cannot effectively help others until this happens. Being a therapist can be tough because you may represent the person that your client has the issue with-transference. And clients can be cruel and you learn to develop a thick skin. I also worked with someone that retired and she never worked through her problems. She was a nightmare to everyone including herself. She could just never see it was her most of the time. Encourage your wife to get therapy before any decisions are made. A masters degree will be a minimum of 50k.
I have been considering becoming a mental health therapist. I’m thinking I could hypothetically get the masters for it in two more years of school (I have 4 years of college in other things, though related). What is some advice you might have for me in pursuing the education, and also knowing it’s there right career fit for me? (I am a married male)
Great joint performance...Dave;s response is great and you can see that Rachel cares.
I was once a social worker, even went back to school and got a masters. Working in mental is tough. If she’s overwhelmed right now, it’s not going to change as a clinician it will likely only intensify and she will have more debt. Clinical work is all about notes, documentation, systems, etc. I would tell her to explore other career paths before getting a masters.
Most impressive that ATM's can now speak in conversation using the AI.
Lol! Pretty much what he is now.
lol 😂 yup
Gonna be a long life for this kid
Dave Ramsey's insights have been a game-changer for me! His practical approach to financial management has empowered me to take control of my money and work towards a debt-free life. The Total Money Makeover is my go-to guide, and I appreciate how he breaks down complex concepts into easy-to-follow steps.
Guzzle that Kool-aid.
his advice are pretty common sense tbh, nothing really special and i've watched a few to see what's all the hype. i have not found anything useful or helpful in his videos and he has also given really bad advice.
I don’t find fulfillment in my work. However, it pays well and it meets all of my practical needs. It funds my life that’s it. I fill my life with other things that make me happy, such as spending time with family, friends, hobbies, traveling etc. That is adulthood for most Americans. Sometimes passions don’t pay
It’s normal for a 23 years old to struggle with workplace environments and wanted to explore different jobs. She is indeed too young to be a mom and that could hold her back financially and career wise. I think Dave and Rachel made it sound like she’s crazy. She’s just young and still figuring out her path.
She is still changing jobs too much regardless, every job has its problems, there is no such thing as a perfect job.
I had two children when I was 23. I loved being a mom! 💕
The husband was trying to paint her in a bad light - he clearly just wanted them to side with him so he could say "see, honey - even Ramsay thinks you shouldn't quit your job..."
Your gonna be fine, you can always forbearance the loans or do the income repayment plan. After baby she can go back to work. Ur in navy and i think have free child care and all those perks
I sucked it up! Outdoor manual labor as a female in a male environment. Was tough.
He did not read the writing on the wall, and he ignored it
Gonna be a long life for this kid
What a great guy/partner. She is blessed to have such a special man. Wow! Blown away by his genuine heart. God bless their marriage and growing family.
She doesn't want to work.
What a patient and understanding, loving and supportive husband. He'll always carry her and anxieties if he doesn't stand ground more firm on responsibilities.
He does sound wonderful. She is lucky!
"She feels like people are angry with her for trying to help." - welcome to social work.
All that education and debt just to become a stay at home mom. I feel bad for this Navy brother its not going to end well for him.
Blame the system not the product
He never said she is going to be a stay at home mom.
@@jimmymcgill6778the writing is on the wall it’s almost certain that she’s going to want to stay home and he knows it
Well I was an RN for 15 years and left my career to be a SAHM. I value my children more than a job so....
@@katiejon17 You put in the work and made the money for 15 years though. That's a different story from the lady here. She just got her degree, can't hold a job because she's unstable mentally or emotionally. If she becomes a stay at home mom now then that means that loan was nothing more than a WASTE. Sad.
Working during the first trimester is hard. You're so tired, the morning sickness, your brain is mush. I stopped working during my pregnancy. I just got back to work when my son was 3 and my daughter was 1 and a half.
I have worked social work for 40 years. Some of it’s rewarding but few and far between. Suck it up is right! Bottom line is it’s a job to provide and secondary to fulfillment. She need to not bail and work off that student debt before the baby comes.
“If Bob has a problem everywhere he goes, Bob IS the problem.” This woman doesn’t want “meaning and satisfaction” in her work. She wants glory. She doesn’t want to work her way up, she doesn’t want to learn. She feels entitled to just step into anything she wants. Someone taught her that’s how it works and now she’s in the world finding out that it doesn’t work that way. With a healthy mindset, you can find meaning in cleaning toilets. And if not, you find meaning on payday when you realize you can take care of your family. There’s no greater meaning than that.
sounds like you know a lot about this woman without even talking to her!
@@intimacy2138 It make a lot of sense. She cannot handle someone being mean to her at work. SHe needs serious counseling. No way can she handle a child
Not everyone is the same. The only time I’ve ever had anyone be “mean to me” like that at work was when I was in customer service. I’ve never had employers or coworkers treat me like that. And I’ve been in the workforce…. 20 ish years. May depend on your field. I’m in education, special needs and non profit work. But, employers don’t treat people like that…. Because it’s inhumane. We are able to change jobs. This wasn’t a forever career.
I never wanted someone else raising my children so we lived on one income my husband was self-employed & we had to scrimp & be as frugal as we could we drove used cars, cooked 90% of meals at home bought good clothes at Goodwill & Consignment Shops except for shoes & lived on the tightest budget we could so maybe he needs to show her the tight budget they will be living on if she stops work now & then she can stay home when the baby comes!
Most of us don’t like our jobs. It’s a means to an end. Most of us suck it up until something better comes along. This woman is still young and a little immature. She wants to stay home and do nothing
I had a baby at 23 also, I remember it was a scary time not feeling completely ready and just finishing college, having debt, etc.. but God helped us through, He never leaves us. Having a baby will definitely be a full time job, and there is such a need for moms being there for their kiddos. Everything works out in the end, trust in God, He is faithful 😊
Fast forward to 5:11 of the video... it should speak to your soul. Brilliantly stated!!!
She's going to quit him next.
Good point!
Payday for her!
Yup, have had many experiences of jobs I hated or didn’t like but guess what? I needed the money! It’s sure a great motivator to look for a new job!!