Thank you for this!! I would love to share what your inner authority has done for your outer authority to help me recognize my inner authority lol This video helped me realize the dark moment that was the low end of my wave, being just so sudden.and ending so sudden. . I was at the low end of my wave after getting myself into a bad cycle with the heavy drugs and was in my darkest dramatic moment.. was spiraling down for years but came out of nowhere .. wound up, withdrawing, screaming in the cold feeling so alone in the dark thinking my mother was right, none of my friends really care about me they are just drug friends. I felt so weak, alone, misunderstood, and like there was no one to turn to. No one who cared. It was one of the most dark and vulnerable moments for me. After a while of that, I realized Joey cares about me. He had moved a few towns away, so we didn’t see each other as often, but still got together every few months. I called him and told him how I was feeling and what was going on. As soon as he got out of work, he came to me and took me out to breakfast. After that we locked ourselves in his house and got clean and started going to therapy and started the most loving life together. So then this 3740 wave went up and up and up from 2016 until 2021. Five years of this excitement and love spiraling upwards! We were friends for years before we were together and he always had a thing for me, but I was in a relationship.. fast forward We very spontaneously (due to my wave, ) got clean togetherfrom hard drugs in 2016 and fell deeply head over heals in love. the love and excitement never stopped spiraling upward.. living together, working together, having a daughter, him being the only one I needed .. I stayed with him through a year of dark psychosis, but knew he would come out of it, besides that our relationship was fairytale perfect. we both have the59.6 and it is my south node When he passed away in 2021 so spontaneously and unexpectedl.. my wave flatlined. And I don’t know if I really let myself feel everything to the fullest. It’s so hard being a projector working 40 hours a week and a single mom. I’m not sure if I spiritually bypassed it. By looking at the perspective that I’m so grateful that I had a relationship like that, and when he died, I started taking trainings and working to empower myself and others more as a peer recovery specialist. But now, after a few years into my grief and into my human design, I noticed I missing that feeling of excitement that I had for so long and it’s slowly picking back up but it’s still kind of flat because I don’t have that full excitement integrated in all areas of my life and I feel ..agitated? atI things that don’t give me that sense of excitement. I’m wondering if the key here is going to be at some point in time all of the feelings about his death are going to drop out of my numbness Either way it feels like I don’t have much control over the way at all.. lol
Have you noticed a difference in how your wave plays out? Please share! If you love someone with tribal authority, did they help you make sense of what's going on and give you some insight as to how to best interact with them?
Thank you for this!! I would love to share what your inner authority has done for your outer authority to help me recognize my inner authority lol
This video helped me realize the dark moment that was the low end of my wave, being just so sudden.and ending so sudden. .
I was at the low end of my wave after getting myself into a bad cycle with the heavy drugs and was in my darkest dramatic moment.. was spiraling down for years but came out of nowhere
.. wound up, withdrawing, screaming in the cold feeling so alone in the dark thinking my mother was right, none of my friends really care about me they are just drug friends. I felt so weak, alone, misunderstood, and like there was no one to turn to. No one who cared. It was one of the most dark and vulnerable moments for me. After a while of that, I realized Joey cares about me. He had moved a few towns away, so we didn’t see each other as often, but still got together every few months. I called him and told him how I was feeling and what was going on. As soon as he got out of work, he came to me and took me out to breakfast. After that we locked ourselves in his house and got clean and started going to therapy and started the most loving life together. So then this 3740 wave went up and up and up from 2016 until 2021. Five years of this excitement and love spiraling upwards!
We were
friends for years before we were together and he always had a thing for me, but I was in a relationship.. fast forward We very spontaneously (due to my wave, ) got clean togetherfrom hard drugs in 2016 and fell deeply head over heals in love. the love and excitement never stopped spiraling upward.. living together, working together, having a daughter, him being the only one I needed .. I stayed with him through a year of dark psychosis, but knew he would come out of it, besides that our relationship was fairytale perfect. we both have the59.6 and it is my south node
When he passed away in 2021 so spontaneously and unexpectedl.. my wave flatlined. And I don’t know if I really let myself feel everything to the fullest. It’s so hard being a projector working 40 hours a week and a single mom. I’m not sure if I spiritually bypassed it. By looking at the perspective that I’m so grateful that I had a relationship like that, and when he died, I started taking trainings and working to empower myself and others more as a peer recovery specialist. But now, after a few years into my grief and into my human design, I noticed I missing that feeling of excitement that I had for so long and it’s slowly picking back up but it’s still kind of flat because I don’t have that full excitement integrated in all areas of my life and I feel ..agitated? atI things that don’t give me that sense of excitement.
I’m wondering if the key here is going to be at some point in time all of the feelings about his death are going to drop out of my numbness Either way it feels like I don’t have much control over the way at all.. lol
Thank you for sharing some of your story💞 We let go of control and find we are liberated. Hugs.
Have you noticed a difference in how your wave plays out? Please share!
If you love someone with tribal authority, did they help you make sense of what's going on and give you some insight as to how to best interact with them?