@@PinkMarshmallows exactly. Plan 1: get that investor money... it didnt work -- Plan 2: bring the kids to his work to catch him off guard and try again for investor money... it didnt work -- Plan 3: send email to saying the both of you simultaneously realized OP was right. as soon as he responds, they immediately agree and play happy family
They’re playing the long game. Gonna wait until he’s built a bond with the grandkids and then issue an ultimatum that if he doesn’t help them financially, they won’t let him see them anymore.
@@drmengus If he say that they or their kids will inherit exactly 0 dollars, they will departure that day, guaranteed...no need for him to wait that long, he jyst need to be clear with them
@@yeyosilver7067 And he's Right, He's Old-- Had this been 15 years earlier doubt he'd give a hoot about them as much...But He's getting Old...Priority change. Don't be surprise the Ex Wife suddenly tries to warm her way eventually
@@yeyosilver7067 So what? 8 years is a long time to give your father the middle finger when he did nothing wrong to deserve it. They could have visited, they could have invited him to their weddings. They didn't. That's just plain cruel.
They obviously came back because OP is making good money now and they need help. Who the hell tells their parent that they had absolutely nothing to do with for 8 years, that if they want to be apart of the grandchildren’s lives, they have to help out financially?!?! It’s obvious that they NEED help and they think they can use OP for financial support and it’s absolutely disgusting that they will only let OP be around their children IF OP pays them. OPs kids are spoiled brats that need a smack of reality. They’re grown adults, they need to learn to stand on their own 2 feet and stop relying on others to support their children.
If my children told me I wasn't invited to their wedding... I'd write a letter to their future spouse (and his/her parents) outlining the cheating, divorce, the stepfather, and me not being invited to the wedding. I'd then tell them if they believe my son/daughter won't cheat or leave them when someone with more money comes along, or they aren't marrying you for money, etc. they are clearly delusional. Hope they make the right decision, but that I have the good sense to disown and distance my own child.
They denied you access to their grandchildren and now you have no relationship of any kind with those grandchildren and now they're expecting you to also financially bankroll these grandchildren you have no relationship with
Guy needed to step back and ask himself who the kids have been calling grandpa for the past 6ish years and continue not being it to the selfish spawns of his.
It's too late to repair the relationship with his kids, they got bought by their step-dad, but it's not too late for a relationship for the grandchildren, OP can make sure that they don't end up like their parents.
No he can't. He has no power to do that, since those children are with their parents far more than they are with him. Also, his kids were with him, and they ended up the way they too.
@xx-caracardoza-xx7076 Tattoo sucker means the father is a fool, tattoo welcome also means the father is a doormat. Meaning, he is a fool to interact with them now when all they care about is hi money, and is weak since he is opening the door to them to take advantage of him even after that they have already done to him.
Actions speak louder than words. Words are mere utterances from people with no integrity. Words are often nothing. Leaving your pa for years and withholding contact with grandchildren?! That's loud and clear.
While I hope for the best for Op, can't help but think the grandkids are just gonna be used as pawns to get access to his money. Good news is the grandkids sound to be young enough to talk without a filter, so when his grandkids start saying stuff like "Daddy keeps saying Granddad needs to stop wasting his money on fishing and help daddy with his bills" or "or mammy said we're gonna stop coming over unless you start buying us things" he'll know it was all BS on their part, but at least for his own peace of mind he knows he tried for his grandkids.
Never take back people into your life who treated you poorly. Best way to screen out the gold diggers, is to tell them you can reconnect, but there will be no financial help, it's only about reconnecting.
Just remember that in the back of their heads is still the idea that your money will go to them eventually! If life is good for you all then leave something for the grandkids but most should still go to either your friend and business partner or even employees that have been with you awhile!
Yesterday I listened to this story and now when I was studying (when I study I think about anything but the book😂 ) I had an epiphomy the kids wanted to reconnect not because they wanted to have connection when the father but had planned for the inheritance.
This guy is trading on hope, his kids are going to take what they can, and when they've milked him for what they can, they'll turn their backs on him again. Better to be the controlling person in any possible pain you experience.
@ just cause someone is your child, brother, mother, etc. it doesn’t matter. If you can’t cut people out of your life who treat you like a doormat, you’re an idiot
@@munchie3909fuck that. Love is only unconditional to children and animals and these backstabbers are neither now. At some point you got to wash your hands of toxic people regardless of who they are to you as a person
What makes it pretty clear that they were lying when they showed up at the door is that they had turned him down from seeing the grandchildren because of the mother. If they had decided it was time to get back in his life, regardless of what the mother wanted, then that wouldn't have happened. Anything after that is icing on the lie cake. I guess hopefully he gets to know his grandkids, but I wouldn't bet on it not being a long con.
Best of luck with the future but, sadly, it does seem very contrived that they only want you back in their lives now that their stepdad has distanced them from his money.
The ex wife is incredibly selfish, especially being a sahm in the 2000s-2010s. A single income household was not realistic even for tradesmen and teachers at the time.
I suggest making a will in advance just in case to protect your assets. People's true color always comes out when money is involved and gets magnified if they're desperate.
Sorry OP, your kids are totally using you. Using their kids as the excuse was so disgusting it’s shameful. Please OP, pay attention to the red flags, one of your grandchildren is freaking 4 and you never met them. Now you’re good enough? Not your monkey not your show.
OK. After listening to this doozy of a story, I honestly still don’t believe the children are genuine. Maria cheated on OP, got married in less than six months after the divorce. Mind you, the children are already older. So it’s not like they were kids. I digress… Mariah is a scumbag. She’s the one who broke up the family. But the kids are no better. For eight years, OP tried to get in touch with his children, but there was no communication, not a single text, not a single call, not a single visit. They went through getting married, having children WITHOUT OP. The only reason I still don’t trust them, because I still feel like they’re using their children to get to OP. Very little, but very consistent of breaking down his emotional wall. Even if they’re not showing it. Those excuses that Maria and her husband were gonna always be at every event is just straight BS. Maria knew what she did was wrong. So instead of them facing OP and facing the repercussions of their actions, especially Maria, they very stupidly, decides to shun OP and expect him to welcome them back with open arms. Delulu they must be… 🙄 OP can build a relationship with the grandkids, but he needs to be very, very vigilant with his kids. I would say-when OP reaches that time when he wants to retire, he should just give ownership to someone else other than his children. When he passes on, leave most of his inheritance to the grandkids. Set up a trust fund: the clause to the trust fund should be once they reach of age and they are deciding what they want to do whether it be go to college or just start a job or new business, the money that he saved in the inheritance can go towards their future. Any other clause should be nobody, but his lawyer would have access to the funds. I would give a very small amount to his kids, and leave a note stating why he gave them that small amount. But hey 🤷🏾, that’s just me. I know I’m rambling on and on, but oh well.
This man is too sensitive for his own good. Good thing people outside of him made him see reality. Wait, I was wrong. He is a shortsighted wimp. They are playing the long game on him, and he is so desparate that he does not realize it.
That is betrayal of the most painful sort. By your own kids...I would not have forgiven them and well, I will do my best to pretend they don't exist. They did the same.
I get it in why op is suckered back to reconcile with his children and grand children, because ultimately he's still their dad and grandfather, he's getting old and lonely. Just stay vigilant, continue to have relationships with them but never give them any cents, cut them off your inheritance, except maybe some trust funds for you grandchildren that's it.
They picked a side...they didn't need you in all those year's they'd been missing, so they should keep that same energy... it's not about ego.. they could've stayed neutral and supported both parent's.. but they chosed their moms lover over their own father..money was more important than a relationship with their dad.. the years he spent loving, caring and raising them meant absolutely nothing.. they brought their children as a means to emotionally manipulate you.... if they truly wanted you to have a relationship with their kids, they wouldn't have excluded you from their life all these years, they wouldn't have waited until they were in financial trouble to include you... you don't need this type of family.. they're definitely only back now because they need money.. if their life was still going great they would've continued to ignore Op.
I feel the kids are using the grandkids as a way to swipe the inheritance from OP. They realize that they already screwed up and OP isnt getting any younger and doesnt have too many years left in him, so they came up with a long game plan to use the grandkids to grow close to the OP so in they are the sole inheritors of his assets in the will. It is also a plus if they are slowly rebuilding the relationship as father and child that they might end up back as the inheritors if the OP forgives them. This plan of theirs if its as I think is truly insidious, and is them trying to drain OP for everything he has after he dies.
no matter what they want but using the kids as a bridge to make a relationship when it was built on a shaky foundation. theyll be using the kids for an ultimatum.
Classic nice guy. You teach people how to treat you and they made their choice 8 years ago. Accept it. They are strangers and deserve no sympathy. It's weak men like him that create the pain in their own lives.
If they truly want to reconcile and not about the money, just tell them that they and the kids got no involvement on your will and you will not ever put out any help or money for them and their kids. Then see if their intention are genuine after that.
I wonder if the kids' spouses had a hand in turning their attitudes around, after finding out how selfishly they'd treated their father in the past (and in the present).
No, because neither spouse reached out to him to invite him to the wedding or reception. Their spouses only care about the possibility of getting money out of him too. A good spouse would have made room for him at those important affairs unless he was known to be a bad person.
This struck a chord with me (even down to the guy's age). Not exactly the same but not heard from my kids for over 10 years, I can only assume because the other side of the family have money they want a part of. One of them has married and I sent cash as a gift since I wasn't invited - I did get a 'thank you' for that but no response since that to my attempts to communicate. People always say once children become adults they'll be in touch once they realise what happened during the divorce but I think the thought of the big money from the other side of the family trumps that. Little bastards.
Kids chose mom and her AP. They’d be dead to me. The daughter royally screwed up because only her real dad has a right to”giver her away” at her wedding. OP should’ve told her that her marriage is illegitimate because of that.
I'm aorry but there's no way to salvage the relationship with them.. you now know they will drop you like a poop covered tissue as soon as something they deem better comes along.. you now know they have no loyalty and will eagerly jump ship.. you'll never be able to look at them the same. You'll never be able to trust them... they chosed money over you... if he thinks they wouldn't do it again, he's delusional..
He should build a relationship but make it clear he will never give them a single dime and any inheritance will be in a trust for their children, remove all monetary reward they can see. I also hope they both get cheated on so they can see how cruel they were to try and get him to take back a cheater and then have his kids side with a cheater
I don't even know if I would want see the kids after all that man, because everythimg would remind me of what happened, that's the kind of thing that you don't forget
Kids choose wrong and never include op in there wedding and grandkids lives and never seen op in past 8 years of no contact and only want op in there lives cause op make something in himself as co owner now that step dad business is sold they lost there job. Now that op has money they now want to reconcile cause op has money and black mail op saying money is for grandkids. Would tell them I aint dad since you cut me off but when step-dad is cutting you off now all of a sudden that bio dad has a company he started now need to reconcile? Yea right i am in my mid 50s but I can make or adopt a kid
So they respect their step dad's decisions for his company and finances even if it affects them negatively but they don't have the same energy for their father. Usually I'm on the side of reconciliation but in this case they are just trying to manipulate him and would probably abandon him to an old people's home if God forbid a time ever came where he needs them to watch over him. He is better off getting a surrogate, getting a baby mama or adopting if he wants an heir. He should also save and plan/savings so that he has nurses who will take care of him when he cant do it himself because those kids will never do it
Around the 10 minute mark. If your kids want to reconnect, then they can reconnect. Giving them money should not be part of this if their intentions are genuine they shouldn’t have any problem with that.
It is not a relationship, if all the want is help, they are using you, I am sorry to say this, better of keeping your distance, make sure if you have a will it is iron clad, that they can not get any money from you after passing away. Move on find someone better to share your life with, but make sure you also have a iron clad prenup just to cover yourself.
so, their (grand plan) to make up for 8 years of neglect not and putting a homewrecker and adulterer before him at every opportunity after accepting a bribe from them. was to let him have the privilege of investing in there (totally wont fail) business. yeah, he should have cut them off completely and used the legal system to crowbar his way into his grandkids lives if he had too grandparents' rights and all. also, anyone got a link to the original reddit story?
betrayed him and choose the other dude, he should tell them to go ask their mom and new father, he should not ever invested in any thing they do ever,if he have the money he can start a business himself and make more money.
Even without the weddings they could have just visited with their spouses and children. The excuse about the mother being bothered makes no sense unless they were literally keeping tabs on them 24/7 or some equally stupid crap.
It's not your fault it's your wife's fault because she was cheating on him with her new husband because he didn't make that much money for a high school sport coach and his kids only cared about his real dad's money because they're in trouble and that's not right and she should pay for her actions and go to hell for what she has done to him and if you guys can't see that then you guys are delusional and she doesn't deserve anything for cheating on him with her new husband because he didn't make that much money for a high school sport coach and his kids only cared his real dad's money because they're in trouble and you don't have to apologize for anything it's her fault not yours.
I think the email is a true appology. They admitted their faults, did not try to justify anything & just asked him to know the G/kids even if he never forgives his kids.
Dragging their kids along for the sympathy/bribery card is absolutely Bullshit. Nice to know they inherited mom’s habits
And they bring the kids when they got deseperate and not in the 1st time they meet after 8 years. They do mot considere him part of their family
The mother trained them well every move they made was calculated to the end it's like saying go asked your dad if you need money/job 😂
the apple doesnt fall far from the tree
to quote someone 'some mistakes (choices) cannot be fixed'
I think they already knew about the affair of they were trying to get him to forgive her so quick
The mother married two months after the divorce and none of the kids bring it to the bio dad
I would have made it very clear not to expect any inheritance in the future. That would show how truly genuine they really are.
Yep. OP's kids are playing the long game.
@@PinkMarshmallows He could have all his assets put into a trust that his kids can't touch, and give it all to his grandkids when they reach 18.
Smart, seeing them I wouldn't put it past them
@@PinkMarshmallows exactly. Plan 1: get that investor money... it didnt work -- Plan 2: bring the kids to his work to catch him off guard and try again for investor money... it didnt work -- Plan 3: send email to saying the both of you simultaneously realized OP was right. as soon as he responds, they immediately agree and play happy family
They’re playing the long game. Gonna wait until he’s built a bond with the grandkids and then issue an ultimatum that if he doesn’t help them financially, they won’t let him see them anymore.
Exactly what I was thinking
or even longer game. He's old, single, and no other heir. They're going to wait for him to die to get that inheritance.
obviously, they are there for inheritance
He's 58. They'll have to wait a loooong time
@@drmengus If he say that they or their kids will inherit exactly 0 dollars, they will departure that day, guaranteed...no need for him to wait that long, he jyst need to be clear with them
Op is the definition of "Men can't take the hint" like bruh they kinda made it clear from the beginning that they didn't want you
I mean, I believe in second chances, but OP needs to be more vigilant of his children's intentions
Let's be real here, you're only calling him that because he's a man.
A man = doormat
A woman = manipulated
He's a father bro
@@yeyosilver7067 And he's Right, He's Old-- Had this been 15 years earlier doubt he'd give a hoot about them as much...But He's getting Old...Priority change. Don't be surprise the Ex Wife suddenly tries to warm her way eventually
@@yeyosilver7067
So what?
8 years is a long time to give your father the middle finger when he did nothing wrong to deserve it.
They could have visited, they could have invited him to their weddings.
They didn't.
That's just plain cruel.
They obviously came back because OP is making good money now and they need help. Who the hell tells their parent that they had absolutely nothing to do with for 8 years, that if they want to be apart of the grandchildren’s lives, they have to help out financially?!?! It’s obvious that they NEED help and they think they can use OP for financial support and it’s absolutely disgusting that they will only let OP be around their children IF OP pays them. OPs kids are spoiled brats that need a smack of reality. They’re grown adults, they need to learn to stand on their own 2 feet and stop relying on others to support their children.
Rn They are standing on there 6ft long ego
If my children told me I wasn't invited to their wedding...
I'd write a letter to their future spouse (and his/her parents) outlining the cheating, divorce, the stepfather, and me not being invited to the wedding. I'd then tell them if they believe my son/daughter won't cheat or leave them when someone with more money comes along, or they aren't marrying you for money, etc. they are clearly delusional. Hope they make the right decision, but that I have the good sense to disown and distance my own child.
They denied you access to their grandchildren and now you have no relationship of any kind with those grandchildren and now they're expecting you to also financially bankroll these grandchildren you have no relationship with
Dude YOU CAN'T BUY LOVE you'll give and give and end up broke and still alone bless you
Who wants to bet he was also not the father
Guy needed to step back and ask himself who the kids have been calling grandpa for the past 6ish years and continue not being it to the selfish spawns of his.
Why OP never gave up his parental rights is beyond me the moment those kids chose the AP is their last day as my family
Parental rights only matter prior to children being recognised as legal adults who can make their own decisions about health, finances etc.
Damn straight you choose your cheating mother and her AP you're disowned goodbye good riddance see you never
The kids were already adults and had left home. Parental rights only matter for children.
Because it's a fake story where the OP must be a beta wimpy loser, so that the drama will keep us hooked
Comprehending what you read/hear is important. Listen to the story and try again.
It's too late to repair the relationship with his kids, they got bought by their step-dad, but it's not too late for a relationship for the grandchildren, OP can make sure that they don't end up like their parents.
No he can't. He has no power to do that, since those children are with their parents far more than they are with him. Also, his kids were with him, and they ended up the way they too.
9:27 OP needs to tell them “ ok I’ll give you guys a chance but I’m not giving you a penny “ see how quick they stay in contact after
The WAY people PREY on a Good Man's NATURE is Criminal.
OP should tattoo "Sucker" on his forehead and "Welcome" on his back.
I don’t get it. Am I slow?
@xx-caracardoza-xx7076 yes
@xx-caracardoza-xx7076 Tattoo sucker means the father is a fool, tattoo welcome also means the father is a doormat. Meaning, he is a fool to interact with them now when all they care about is hi money, and is weak since he is opening the door to them to take advantage of him even after that they have already done to him.
Actions speak louder than words. Words are mere utterances from people with no integrity. Words are often nothing. Leaving your pa for years and withholding contact with grandchildren?! That's loud and clear.
This guy's a walking doormat
Trying to not be a fool. Still ended up being a fool.
You must also be a special kind of stupid how did he end up being a fool bro literally trying to fix stuff before it's too late
that’s heartbreaking. It’s painful enough dealing with betrayal from a partner, but having your own kids turn their back on you for material gain?
8 years without any contacts........
Those kids are ungrateful brats
While I hope for the best for Op, can't help but think the grandkids are just gonna be used as pawns to get access to his money. Good news is the grandkids sound to be young enough to talk without a filter, so when his grandkids start saying stuff like "Daddy keeps saying Granddad needs to stop wasting his money on fishing and help daddy with his bills" or "or mammy said we're gonna stop coming over unless you start buying us things" he'll know it was all BS on their part, but at least for his own peace of mind he knows he tried for his grandkids.
Bruh they left op for 8 years and still op is having doubts whether he should help them or not?
Just say no and say where you all were for 8 years ??
You don't have to block your kids, just don't give them any money. If they only want money from you, you'll know soon enough.
Your kids cut you off for years you've never seen your grandkids and now suddenly they're back with their hands out? No.
If they're not there for your rise, they don't deserve you during your reign
Never take back people into your life who treated you poorly. Best way to screen out the gold diggers, is to tell them you can reconnect, but there will be no financial help, it's only about reconnecting.
Just remember that in the back of their heads is still the idea that your money will go to them eventually! If life is good for you all then leave something for the grandkids but most should still go to either your friend and business partner or even employees that have been with you awhile!
Yesterday I listened to this story and now when I was studying (when I study I think about anything but the book😂 ) I had an epiphomy the kids wanted to reconnect not because they wanted to have connection when the father but had planned for the inheritance.
They are going to play the long game with Opie and he is going to deserve every bit of embarrassment he's going to get out of it.
OP's kids are going to play the long game.
OP made a bad move in the end.
This guy is trading on hope, his kids are going to take what they can, and when they've milked him for what they can, they'll turn their backs on him again. Better to be the controlling person in any possible pain you experience.
story 1: op should have stayed no contact....these leeches only came back to drain out op....
Op should’ve gotten a paternity test to see if they were even his children in the first place.
He even acknowledges he’s been a doormat and still can’t cut ties. What a fool
They are his children. No matter what, a good father will always have some love for his kids. OP isn’t a fool, he’s a father.
@ just cause someone is your child, brother, mother, etc. it doesn’t matter. If you can’t cut people out of your life who treat you like a doormat, you’re an idiot
@@munchie3909fuck that. Love is only unconditional to children and animals and these backstabbers are neither now. At some point you got to wash your hands of toxic people regardless of who they are to you as a person
@@munchie3909nah he foolish
They didn't treat him like dad
"So blatantly obvious"
Redundant redundancy is redundant.
If they were genuine about wanting a relationship they would have came around years ago
What makes it pretty clear that they were lying when they showed up at the door is that they had turned him down from seeing the grandchildren because of the mother.
If they had decided it was time to get back in his life, regardless of what the mother wanted, then that wouldn't have happened.
Anything after that is icing on the lie cake.
I guess hopefully he gets to know his grandkids, but I wouldn't bet on it not being a long con.
They came cause of his grandkids, the same grandkids they kept away from him LOL!
Karma is comming for them
Best of luck with the future but, sadly, it does seem very contrived that they only want you back in their lives now that their stepdad has distanced them from his money.
The ex wife is incredibly selfish, especially being a sahm in the 2000s-2010s. A single income household was not realistic even for tradesmen and teachers at the time.
You is a good man OP. I would’ve told them leeches to kick rocks. They gonna use you thru the love of your grand babies
I suggest making a will in advance just in case to protect your assets. People's true color always comes out when money is involved and gets magnified if they're desperate.
Story 1: block, file a protection order for harassment and press charges for stalking.
would be funny if he just decided to start a whole new family. but I dont think he has the energy for that
Sorry OP, your kids are totally using you. Using their kids as the excuse was so disgusting it’s shameful. Please OP, pay attention to the red flags, one of your grandchildren is freaking 4 and you never met them. Now you’re good enough? Not your monkey not your show.
OK. After listening to this doozy of a story, I honestly still don’t believe the children are genuine.
Maria cheated on OP, got married in less than six months after the divorce. Mind you, the children are already older. So it’s not like they were kids. I digress…
Mariah is a scumbag. She’s the one who broke up the family.
But the kids are no better. For eight years, OP tried to get in touch with his children, but there was no communication, not a single text, not a single call, not a single visit. They went through getting married, having children WITHOUT OP.
The only reason I still don’t trust them, because I still feel like they’re using their children to get to OP. Very little, but very consistent of breaking down his emotional wall. Even if they’re not showing it.
Those excuses that Maria and her husband were gonna always be at every event is just straight BS. Maria knew what she did was wrong. So instead of them facing OP and facing the repercussions of their actions, especially Maria, they very stupidly, decides to shun OP and expect him to welcome them back with open arms. Delulu they must be… 🙄
OP can build a relationship with the grandkids, but he needs to be very, very vigilant with his kids. I would say-when OP reaches that time when he wants to retire, he should just give ownership to someone else other than his children. When he passes on, leave most of his inheritance to the grandkids. Set up a trust fund: the clause to the trust fund should be once they reach of age and they are deciding what they want to do whether it be go to college or just start a job or new business, the money that he saved in the inheritance can go towards their future. Any other clause should be nobody, but his lawyer would have access to the funds. I would give a very small amount to his kids, and leave a note stating why he gave them that small amount.
But hey 🤷🏾, that’s just me. I know I’m rambling on and on, but oh well.
Definitely not.
To shun him for 8 years when he was the wronged parent in the divorce is 100% cracked, job security or not.
🔥✊🏾Your Children MADE Their CH😤ICE!!…👊🏾💯
This man is too sensitive for his own good. Good thing people outside of him made him see reality. Wait, I was wrong. He is a shortsighted wimp. They are playing the long game on him, and he is so desparate that he does not realize it.
The rotten kids should learn that actions have consequences.
Here a rule. "If they are not there for you at your lowest, do not be there for them when your at your highest."
They chose benefits over loyalty, but I hope you find peace and happiness despite their choices 💔
That is betrayal of the most painful sort. By your own kids...I would not have forgiven them and well, I will do my best to pretend they don't exist. They did the same.
I get it in why op is suckered back to reconcile with his children and grand children, because ultimately he's still their dad and grandfather, he's getting old and lonely. Just stay vigilant, continue to have relationships with them but never give them any cents, cut them off your inheritance, except maybe some trust funds for you grandchildren that's it.
They picked a side...they didn't need you in all those year's they'd been missing, so they should keep that same energy... it's not about ego.. they could've stayed neutral and supported both parent's.. but they chosed their moms lover over their own father..money was more important than a relationship with their dad.. the years he spent loving, caring and raising them meant absolutely nothing.. they brought their children as a means to emotionally manipulate you.... if they truly wanted you to have a relationship with their kids, they wouldn't have excluded you from their life all these years, they wouldn't have waited until they were in financial trouble to include you... you don't need this type of family.. they're definitely only back now because they need money.. if their life was still going great they would've continued to ignore Op.
The faster you forget the less it hurts
I feel the kids are using the grandkids as a way to swipe the inheritance from OP. They realize that they already screwed up and OP isnt getting any younger and doesnt have too many years left in him, so they came up with a long game plan to use the grandkids to grow close to the OP so in they are the sole inheritors of his assets in the will. It is also a plus if they are slowly rebuilding the relationship as father and child that they might end up back as the inheritors if the OP forgives them. This plan of theirs if its as I think is truly insidious, and is them trying to drain OP for everything he has after he dies.
no matter what they want but using the kids as a bridge to make a relationship when it was built on a shaky foundation. theyll be using the kids for an ultimatum.
Classic nice guy. You teach people how to treat you and they made their choice 8 years ago. Accept it. They are strangers and deserve no sympathy. It's weak men like him that create the pain in their own lives.
If this is real dude is an idiot letting his back stabbing kids back in his life
If they truly want to reconcile and not about the money, just tell them that they and the kids got no involvement on your will and you will not ever put out any help or money for them and their kids. Then see if their intention are genuine after that.
I wonder if the kids' spouses had a hand in turning their attitudes around, after finding out how selfishly they'd treated their father in the past (and in the present).
No, because neither spouse reached out to him to invite him to the wedding or reception. Their spouses only care about the possibility of getting money out of him too. A good spouse would have made room for him at those important affairs unless he was known to be a bad person.
Some people only show up when they need something.
So , they want money for his grandkids that they have never even let him see before ???
This struck a chord with me (even down to the guy's age). Not exactly the same but not heard from my kids for over 10 years, I can only assume because the other side of the family have money they want a part of. One of them has married and I sent cash as a gift since I wasn't invited - I did get a 'thank you' for that but no response since that to my attempts to communicate. People always say once children become adults they'll be in touch once they realise what happened during the divorce but I think the thought of the big money from the other side of the family trumps that. Little bastards.
Their is no benefit to marrying or having kids!
Regardless of gender and circumstance, I love a revenge story
Kids chose mom and her AP. They’d be dead to me. The daughter royally screwed up because only her real dad has a right to”giver her away” at her wedding. OP should’ve told her that her marriage is illegitimate because of that.
I'm aorry but there's no way to salvage the relationship with them.. you now know they will drop you like a poop covered tissue as soon as something they deem better comes along.. you now know they have no loyalty and will eagerly jump ship.. you'll never be able to look at them the same. You'll never be able to trust them... they chosed money over you... if he thinks they wouldn't do it again, he's delusional..
good god, this AI slop drives me crazy
He should build a relationship but make it clear he will never give them a single dime and any inheritance will be in a trust for their children, remove all monetary reward they can see. I also hope they both get cheated on so they can see how cruel they were to try and get him to take back a cheater and then have his kids side with a cheater
I don't even know if I would want see the kids after all that man, because everythimg would remind me of what happened, that's the kind of thing that you don't forget
Now you know why the stepfathers business collapsed.
Kids choose wrong and never include op in there wedding and grandkids lives and never seen op in past 8 years of no contact and only want op in there lives cause op make something in himself as co owner now that step dad business is sold they lost there job. Now that op has money they now want to reconcile cause op has money and black mail op saying money is for grandkids. Would tell them I aint dad since you cut me off but when step-dad is cutting you off now all of a sudden that bio dad has a company he started now need to reconcile? Yea right i am in my mid 50s but I can make or adopt a kid
imagine being a father and not being able to give your sons work to start their own living...no wonder they all chose the other guy
So they respect their step dad's decisions for his company and finances even if it affects them negatively but they don't have the same energy for their father.
Usually I'm on the side of reconciliation but in this case they are just trying to manipulate him and would probably abandon him to an old people's home if God forbid a time ever came where he needs them to watch over him.
He is better off getting a surrogate, getting a baby mama or adopting if he wants an heir. He should also save and plan/savings so that he has nurses who will take care of him when he cant do it himself because those kids will never do it
Naahhh. They tryna be patient with this one and use the grandkids' bond with you
I hope OP has a iron clad will where ever thing is lift to the grandkids
Around the 10 minute mark. If your kids want to reconnect, then they can reconnect. Giving them money should not be part of this if their intentions are genuine they shouldn’t have any problem with that.
It is not a relationship, if all the want is help, they are using you, I am sorry to say this, better of keeping your distance, make sure if you have a will it is iron clad, that they can not get any money from you after passing away. Move on find someone better to share your life with, but make sure you also have a iron clad prenup just to cover yourself.
so, their (grand plan) to make up for 8 years of neglect not and putting a homewrecker and adulterer before him at every opportunity after accepting a bribe from them. was to let him have the privilege of investing in there (totally wont fail) business.
yeah, he should have cut them off completely and used the legal system to crowbar his way into his grandkids lives if he had too grandparents' rights and all.
also, anyone got a link to the original reddit story?
Legit in the beginning the kids said they forgave me... You didn't need forgiving they chose a cheater over you.
This situation sounds similar to what happened to my grandfather
Typical... a stay at home wife complaining that you're not bringing enough home... when she brings home absolutely nothing herself.
betrayed him and choose the other dude, he should tell them to go ask their mom and new father, he should not ever invested in any thing they do ever,if he have the money he can start a business himself and make more money.
Doormat got manipulated
Counselor. They're legally bound to be confidential but also a good neutral sounding board.
Waiting for the next update when they start talking about op paying for college
if they really cared about him they would have at least invited him to their weddings
Even without the weddings they could have just visited with their spouses and children.
The excuse about the mother being bothered makes no sense unless they were literally keeping tabs on them 24/7 or some equally stupid crap.
Stay NC. They chose this path.
Probably not his kids and they know it
They knew about your wife's affair all along. Maybe you should start dating. There is nothing old about being 58
So have not talked at all or you have not met the grandchildren. Until they need money and need a favor.
Kids are playing the long game and OP is a doormat of that game. Ofc, if OP add the gkids to the will, then the parents will have access to that $$
A doormat
Would tell them I have no kids. I mean op can have other kids as well
It's not your fault it's your wife's fault because she was cheating on him with her new husband because he didn't make that much money for a high school sport coach and his kids only cared about his real dad's money because they're in trouble and that's not right and she should pay for her actions and go to hell for what she has done to him and if you guys can't see that then you guys are delusional and she doesn't deserve anything for cheating on him with her new husband because he didn't make that much money for a high school sport coach and his kids only cared his real dad's money because they're in trouble and you don't have to apologize for anything it's her fault not yours.
I think the email is a true appology. They admitted their faults, did not try to justify anything & just asked him to know the G/kids even if he never forgives his kids.
The email was a manipulation to make sure they got into his will.
gavin? GAVIN!!
Please keep this background music, it's relaxing