Hi! I had been looking for your channel for a while now, because you were one of the very first people that I saw on youtube talking about gender identity and figured it all out. Just wanted to say thank you, I have been on hormones for a while now, and I'm living a much happier life. Thank you.
As a Latix person, I have lots of body hair. For many years I was shamed by family, classmates, friends into being a hairless mole rat because I am AFAB. I have very bushy eyebrows and a bit of a stache, and would always wax from face for special occasions and it always made me break out. Then I learned about the beautiful Frida Kahlo. Frida opposed the removal of her unibrow and upper-lip hair and she is icon for it. Since realizing I am non-binary, I have let go of the shame I have always associated with body hair.
so happy I found this video and your channel! I also grow facial hair naturally due to "elevated" testosterone. I was assigned female at birth but I am exploring my gender identity as non binary/gender fluid. I have always been ashamed of my facial hair. As a teen my mom would always urge me to shave or wax or USE NAIR (yes it's as painful as it sounds) on my face! This caused me to feel like something is wrong with me and that I'm ugly. I never told anyone about my facial hair and know all too well of the quick shower shave! I have recently in my twenties began to let my facial hair grow because I notice it is very gender affirming for me and I also want to get over my phobia of being seen as fem presenting with facial hair. I grow my hair out now also because I want to prove to myself that there is nothing wrong with my hair and that I am still beautiful and deserve to be seen just as I am. I have so much scarring from razor bumps on my neck and chin and I think the next step is to develop a proper shaving routine for when I do want to remove some hair and overall embrace myself as a hairy person! Thanks so much for sharing, Dara!
I'm transmasculine and don't like body hair and often feel like I'm the only one, so thank you for sharing this! Personally, I'm too lazy to keep up with my leg hair and I used to be extremely self-conscious/ashamed of it and wouldn't ever let anyone see my legs (I wore jeans year round, and I live in Florida) but a year or so ago I experimented a few times going places in shorts with hairy legs and it turned out no one cares, so now I do it all the time. I've actually been a bit disappointed that it doesn't seem to make anyone gender me female less often 😝 but oh well. I don't have a lot of facial hair but gained some from T and I shave that and my armpits regularly (that's the area that especially feels like I'm the only transmasc person to shave). I love being on T but I'm dreading growing chest or back hair so it's been an ongoing struggle trying to balance.
Non-binary, AFAB here. I have PCOS and have natural chest hair (and full beard) and absolutely LOVE it! For me, at least, it's easy to shave off, but I love how easy it is for me to hide and pretend like it's a fun personal secret. To each their own of course, just sharing a different viewpoint for you. 😄
I have a full beard due to PCOS and now that I've been microdosing T for 4 months, it's really filling in, along with my mustache. I started sprouting facial hair at the same time my male peers did and have been ashamed of it for all of my teens and twenties. Now, in my 30's, I'm reclaiming my body, but I'm not out of the gender closet. Maybe one day I'll live in a place where the focus won't be so strong on appearance and gender and I'll have the gonads to show off my whiskers. Until then, I'll continue to shave every morning. Thanks for your videos!
I started using an electric razor a couple months back for my facial bits of hair and as a nonbinary person, it’s incredibly affirming. I found it pretty amazing how my attitude went from shame to euphoria just by using the right tool for my desired results and celebrating my body’s ability to grow facial hair as an AFAB nonbinary person.
Dara, could you do a video on tips for professionals to come out at work? I know quite a few trans people who are out in every part of their life (friends, fam, etc.), but wait to come out at work because they are worried about how coworkers and bosses will treat them, losing clients, and/or getting fired. Could you talk about strategies people can take if they do want to try and keep their jobs and haw to best get coworkers and higher ups onboard? Also taking into account if folks are teachers (dealing with student's and parent reactions) or in jobs where clients may also question or have issues with their identity. Thanks ;)
Thank you for sharing! I've got a similar story with my T levels and growing facial hair. I hid it and shaved for years. Once I came out an enby I decided to just try growing it--just because I thought it would be a sad thing to have gone through my whole life and never tried it. So I gave myself a few months, and I'm so glad I did. What you can see in my profile pic is what I was able to grow pre starting T therapy. It's not much, but it changed everything about the way I see myself. If your ever feeling like you want to, I highly recommended taking the risk. 💚💜
@@SylviaRustyFae I agree, there should be greater acceptance of transgender and gender-nonconforming people. Gender expression should be free and not limited by social stigma. For me having facial is too much of a dysphoric experience and its innate rather than being attributed to societal pressure. I feel with the existing gender roles and gender schemas, it helps trans people with passing and have gender-affirming feelings/gender euphoria. I think it is dumb, but for me and many other transfeminine people it has helped.
@@l.snider6193 Yeah, all of my dysphoria around my beard is directly linked to societal dysphoria and not body dysphoria; I find my beard to be something I love and that makes me feel euphoric when around people who don't just use it as an excuse to call me a man.
How you wear your body hair is a very personal thing. I personally (I'm ftm) don't shave. I slung off the care about what others thought of me a long time ago. If I wana do something, I do it and vice versa when I don't wana do something. Just gotta sling off the burden of other people's thoughts. You can't change them. You can only change you. Make you happy. Explore your curiosities. Give it a go. If you don't like it you can change it back easily.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on shaving and facial hair. It means a lot to me. I am not yet on T however I naturally have higher levels of testosterone in my body and I have had moustaches since I was like 9 years old.
I am non-binary (afab) and I started thinking about going on hormones more intensively over the last few months because I really wish to have a more masculine face and body shape and a deeper voice. On the other hand I really fear growing facial hair - I once tried to paint myself a beard with eyeliner (for a character I played on a roleplay) and it caused me so much anxiety, I couldn't even do this for roleplay-reasons. I also fear the thought of having to shave a beard. So now I am caught right in the middle of desperately wanting to go on hormones and absolutely not wanting it.
Dara i too have a lot of hair on my Face for a gender null but assigned female at birth you do whatever makes you comfortable and it someone has a problem it is their issue. and yes i am more masculine than my brother i refer to myself as gender null because non binary has many meanings and i don't feel as though i have a gender
Hi! I had been looking for your channel for a while now, because you were one of the very first people that I saw on youtube talking about gender identity and figured it all out. Just wanted to say thank you, I have been on hormones for a while now, and I'm living a much happier life. Thank you.
As a Latix person, I have lots of body hair. For many years I was shamed by family, classmates, friends into being a hairless mole rat because I am AFAB. I have very bushy eyebrows and a bit of a stache, and would always wax from face for special occasions and it always made me break out. Then I learned about the beautiful Frida Kahlo. Frida opposed the removal of her unibrow and upper-lip hair and she is icon for it. Since realizing I am non-binary, I have let go of the shame I have always associated with body hair.
💜💛🖤
love this!!
so happy I found this video and your channel! I also grow facial hair naturally due to "elevated" testosterone. I was assigned female at birth but I am exploring my gender identity as non binary/gender fluid. I have always been ashamed of my facial hair. As a teen my mom would always urge me to shave or wax or USE NAIR (yes it's as painful as it sounds) on my face! This caused me to feel like something is wrong with me and that I'm ugly. I never told anyone about my facial hair and know all too well of the quick shower shave! I have recently in my twenties began to let my facial hair grow because I notice it is very gender affirming for me and I also want to get over my phobia of being seen as fem presenting with facial hair. I grow my hair out now also because I want to prove to myself that there is nothing wrong with my hair and that I am still beautiful and deserve to be seen just as I am. I have so much scarring from razor bumps on my neck and chin and I think the next step is to develop a proper shaving routine for when I do want to remove some hair and overall embrace myself as a hairy person! Thanks so much for sharing, Dara!
I'm transmasculine and don't like body hair and often feel like I'm the only one, so thank you for sharing this! Personally, I'm too lazy to keep up with my leg hair and I used to be extremely self-conscious/ashamed of it and wouldn't ever let anyone see my legs (I wore jeans year round, and I live in Florida) but a year or so ago I experimented a few times going places in shorts with hairy legs and it turned out no one cares, so now I do it all the time. I've actually been a bit disappointed that it doesn't seem to make anyone gender me female less often 😝 but oh well. I don't have a lot of facial hair but gained some from T and I shave that and my armpits regularly (that's the area that especially feels like I'm the only transmasc person to shave). I love being on T but I'm dreading growing chest or back hair so it's been an ongoing struggle trying to balance.
Non-binary, AFAB here. I have PCOS and have natural chest hair (and full beard) and absolutely LOVE it! For me, at least, it's easy to shave off, but I love how easy it is for me to hide and pretend like it's a fun personal secret.
To each their own of course, just sharing a different viewpoint for you. 😄
@@colbyb9991 Yeah, if I grew the full amount of hair I'm genetically disposed to, it would not be something I could hide by any means 😂
I have a full beard due to PCOS and now that I've been microdosing T for 4 months, it's really filling in, along with my mustache. I started sprouting facial hair at the same time my male peers did and have been ashamed of it for all of my teens and twenties. Now, in my 30's, I'm reclaiming my body, but I'm not out of the gender closet.
Maybe one day I'll live in a place where the focus won't be so strong on appearance and gender and I'll have the gonads to show off my whiskers. Until then, I'll continue to shave every morning.
Thanks for your videos!
You should do what makes you happy. Sometimes it just takes a little bit to see what works best for you 💖
I started using an electric razor a couple months back for my facial bits of hair and as a nonbinary person, it’s incredibly affirming. I found it pretty amazing how my attitude went from shame to euphoria just by using the right tool for my desired results and celebrating my body’s ability to grow facial hair as an AFAB nonbinary person.
Dara, could you do a video on tips for professionals to come out at work? I know quite a few trans people who are out in every part of their life (friends, fam, etc.), but wait to come out at work because they are worried about how coworkers and bosses will treat them, losing clients, and/or getting fired. Could you talk about strategies people can take if they do want to try and keep their jobs and haw to best get coworkers and higher ups onboard? Also taking into account if folks are teachers (dealing with student's and parent reactions) or in jobs where clients may also question or have issues with their identity. Thanks ;)
AAAA I have the opposite problem, I'm pre-T and I wish I could grow facial hair.
Love
Thank you for sharing! I've got a similar story with my T levels and growing facial hair. I hid it and shaved for years. Once I came out an enby I decided to just try growing it--just because I thought it would be a sad thing to have gone through my whole life and never tried it. So I gave myself a few months, and I'm so glad I did. What you can see in my profile pic is what I was able to grow pre starting T therapy. It's not much, but it changed everything about the way I see myself.
If your ever feeling like you want to, I highly recommended taking the risk. 💚💜
If you want to do it you should try it, i would hurt myself if i participated so i wont be participating :/
Society needs to become more accepting of nonconformity.
@@SylviaRustyFae I agree, there should be greater acceptance of transgender and gender-nonconforming people. Gender expression should be free and not limited by social stigma. For me having facial is too much of a dysphoric experience and its innate rather than being attributed to societal pressure. I feel with the existing gender roles and gender schemas, it helps trans people with passing and have gender-affirming feelings/gender euphoria. I think it is dumb, but for me and many other transfeminine people it has helped.
@@l.snider6193 Yeah, all of my dysphoria around my beard is directly linked to societal dysphoria and not body dysphoria; I find my beard to be something I love and that makes me feel euphoric when around people who don't just use it as an excuse to call me a man.
@@SylviaRustyFae I'm glad, I wish i could be like that, but it is what it is.
Nice Michael J Fox impression, Dara! ;)
I know, right??? I had no idea at the time that's what I was doing. I just thought I admired the shit out of him.
It would be much easier to explore this while on vacation, then when having to go to work.
Such is true of anything with regards to not conforming with cishet expectations...
How you wear your body hair is a very personal thing. I personally (I'm ftm) don't shave. I slung off the care about what others thought of me a long time ago. If I wana do something, I do it and vice versa when I don't wana do something. Just gotta sling off the burden of other people's thoughts. You can't change them. You can only change you. Make you happy. Explore your curiosities. Give it a go. If you don't like it you can change it back easily.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on shaving and facial hair. It means a lot to me. I am not yet on T however I naturally have higher levels of testosterone in my body and I have had moustaches since I was like 9 years old.
I am non-binary (afab) and I started thinking about going on hormones more intensively over the last few months because I really wish to have a more masculine face and body shape and a deeper voice. On the other hand I really fear growing facial hair - I once tried to paint myself a beard with eyeliner (for a character I played on a roleplay) and it caused me so much anxiety, I couldn't even do this for roleplay-reasons. I also fear the thought of having to shave a beard. So now I am caught right in the middle of desperately wanting to go on hormones and absolutely not wanting it.
Well it 'aint gunna be me, denial beard is *never* coming back, I'll donate if you do though.
Dara i too have a lot of hair on my Face for a gender null but assigned female at birth
you do whatever makes you comfortable and it someone has a problem it is their issue.
and yes i am more masculine than my brother
i refer to myself as gender null because
non binary has many meanings and
i don't feel as though i have a gender
Does the term agender resonate with you, or no? It's another way of saying no gender.
Good job for the kid pointing out ur beard you where proven to be slow to see it your self