Many who have experienced trauma feel a kind of call to the void where they seek out abuse that is familiar. Notice sounds like it exemplifies that well.
It's explained well under the psychological theory of "Relational Templates", how we are raised and the relationships we grow up with form templates and frameworks of how we see ourselves and how we seek out relationship dynamics etc, often it's unconscious patterns we fall into without wanting to or even realising.
I am enjoying this series on disturbing books. I am one to recommend adding to your list from a rather surprising source - a novel prize for literature winner. The book is ‘The Piano Teacher’ by Elfrieda Jelinek, a psychologically and sexually disturbing story.
I'm sure you've read some Joyce Carol Oates, but I would love your thoughts on First Love, which I found to be uniquely disquieting. Also LOVE The Cement Garden.
Loving the uploads you been doing recently. Discovered you through Plagued By Visions and decided to subscribe and join your discord and I gotta say that your content is really good and I love how diverse it all is. Loving the series so far as well as all your other uploads (not disturbing book related). I myself really enjoy exploring disturbing literature and here are a few recommendations that I have for disturbing books to read for I would love to hear your thoughts on them (of course you don’t have to read them or anything if you don’t want to, just keep up the great work my man!): 1. The Bighead 2. Haunted 3. Off Season 4. Less Than Zero 5. No Longer Human (more depressing than disturbing) 6. The Rape Of Nanking (it’s nonfiction) Those are just a few of some disturbing books I have and they are all disturbing in their own messed up ways. I highly recommend Less Than Zero even if it’s not for like a disturbing books challenge or anything because it’s really amazing. Keep up the amazing work and take care!
Thank you! Really glad you're enjoying the channel! That's an interesting list! 1. I do need to read this 2. This is actually on my list to read for the project, I just forgot to mention it in this video because I'm an idiot 3. Read - agree it's great 4. Read - and agree it's great but I do need to reread it as I was a teenager first time around. I might reread and compare to his new novel which sounds quiet similar 5. Have heard great things about that 6. I'm deliberately not covering non fiction in the project, but that is an event/atrocity I want to read more on. Thanks again, really appreciate the suggestions and the support!
The Room IS disturbing. Good luck this month. I’ll be praying for your sanity. I read Uzumaki, and went out and bought a bunch of Junji Ito so I may be stuck there for the moment.
I actually have a copy of Hogg. But have been postponing reading it for almost a year now due to the nature of the book. I “snuck read” a few pages here and there and it made me squeamish and intrigued at the same time, which is what disturbed me. Perhaps I will pick it up again and “read along” with your group in Discord. Btw- It wasn’t easy to get a hardcopy in the US.
When I say I've read The Killing Lessons, I mean: I skipped over parts of the book because they bothered me so ... but the thriller part was so good, I did finish it (but not those parts).
Have you been suggested Tampa by Alissa Nutting? It is about a depraved, sociopathic woman who is a teacher and has "relationships" with her young male students. The writing is really good, and it really puts you in this character's head, which is what made it so disturbing to me. I just finished Wax and Wane by Saoirse Ni Chiaragain, about a couple where the husband falls down a far right rabbit hole and finds werewolves at the bottom. I thought it was so good, and really relevant.
Yes, that has been suggested and I think I’ll add it to the list when I’m off my book buying ban and can get it. And Wax and Wane sounds great! Will also add that to my list
I'm going to guess you won't find Geek Love disturbing at all. Interesting, but not really disturbing, unless I'm misremembering. As for Hogg ... I'm a big Delany fan, but I don't think I know anyone who's a fan of Hogg. I don't think I've even read any excerpts. Good luck!
I was going to recommend Hubert Selby Jr as a writer of disturbing books, but I see you already have him covered! Not up for The Room, but if you ever (re-?)read Requiem For. A Dream or Last Exit To Brooklyn, I’d definitely be interested in reading along. I didn’t find Geek Love disturbing, but it’s a book I still think about a lot in terms of power dynamics even though I read it years ago. I really rate it. Also interested in how you find The End of Alice as AM Holmes is a fascinating interviewee and I’m curious about their entire body of work. Bon chance!
I just knew by the title of Cows that I wouldn't be into it because, obviously, cattle and difficult women sprang to mind and from what you just said I'm glad I went with my instinct on that. Between watching a couple of your videos today I ran across Kali's song by Dan Simmons and, although I have read it already, I stuck it on while I was doing stuff (it's on RUclips and I know its not nice but I have really chronic insomnia and I will occasionally stick things on just so I don't have to deal with a physical book, usually they're books uploaded by authors but, my copy of this is at my sisters where all my books eventually go because she has a whole room library at home in Scotland). It's as good as I remember, I am going to get a hold of some on your list and will probably get the Discord thing although I am a really fast reader I may give it a go reading along with you guys, which sounds interesting. Tender is the Flesh? I think we had that already with Soylent Green ? I have read some of Jon Athan's stuff and it's not for me. I wish I could remember that Nick Cutter ones title, it's got a weird house like House of Leaves and the parasitoid wasps. I loved that it was horrible but in a good way lol!
Highly recommend The Cement Garden. I would also recommend two i just read that were quite disturbing, Where I End and My Heart Hemmed In. I've read excepts of Hogg and oh my i can't do it.
I read Tender is the Flesh in 2022. It was definitely one of the most disturbing book I've read, but I'm not very seasoned in more extreme horror books. I love that literature, as a whole, can affect people in a variety of ways. For me, I think the hardest part of Tender is the Flesh was the description. I definitely had to put it down a few times 🤢😂 The only other book that I found to be extremely disturbing was A Child Called "It" by Dave Pelzer, but it may not really fit into your list. It's a nonfiction book about child abuse and it's more disturbing in a heartbreaking way than anything. Very excited to read Gone to See the River Man for Kelsi's book club this month!
Yeah a number of people have suggested A Child Called It, but I'm reluctant to read it (or any non-fiction) for the project because it seems exploitative somehow. Not saying the book is by any means, but just doesn't quite feel right for what I am looking to do here.
I read a child called It in middle school and out of all the books I've read it's been the worst for me. That was a terrible read for my kid brain. Ugh so sad!!!
I really enjoyed My Dark Vanessa. I think the most disturbing thing for me was how I related to her in that that could have easily been me had one of my teachers been that way inclined. Overall not very disturbing though, I thought, but an interesting read from the 'Lolita' perspective.
I found Tender is the Flesh pretty disturbing. I am vegetarian and the thought of any animal being slaughtered is disturbing to me already, so humans was worse. I REALLY enjoyed Pretty Girls, read it in 1 day but wasn't that disturbed by it to be honest.
@benjackson1077 🤦🏻♀️ I think it’s perfectly warranted in the context of books about slaughterhouses 🙄 Btw, how do you know someone is a bit of a mean old grump? 🤔👹😂
Abuse can cling to you like a wet blanket. As horrific as abuse can be, it feels familiar, and therefore you seek it. I was an abuse survivor, and it's always there. The reason I kept straying towards it was that I had a crushing fear of the new. The getting out, and the new life ahead. I felt that I deserved it. That i had must of done something wrong. So I kept slapped around, because it was FAMILIAR. It took 10 years to get out, but I did do it.
For me the most disturbing book is Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door and The End of Alice by A.M Holmes. Ketchum’s book is infamous for how upsetting it is and it deserves every bit of praise it has received. Alice is , as far as I know, is kind of unknown, but it smacks you hard. Pretty Girls was surprisingly shocking for me. I enjoyed it a lot.
You listed Hogg twice in the description, which to me is very appropriate. I’ve read a number of the books on your list so far and I think that and Cows are the most disgusting books I’ve read, but I didn’t think they were that disturbing. They seemed so deliberately over the top that I didn’t feel like I connected with the characters at all.
@@CriminOllyBlog It’s very gross, like Cows but even worse, but I felt like it had the effect, intentionally or unintentionally, of dehumanizing every character. It ends up just feeling like a splatter movie where the gore is so gross and over the top that it ends up being kind of funny. I honestly think it’s a good book, but there isn’t a single person in my life that I would recommend it to.
Very interesting to hear your thoughts on this project so far Olly - one I think you're very brave for even starting! I've only read two from your list, as I tend to avoid 'extreme horror' and the more disturbing, 'real life' books like 'Notice' for my own mental health. But I did read 'Exquisite Corpse' a number of years ago (during a slightly overwrought, late teens, goth phase 😂) and remember being fascinated by it, if 'enjoyed' is not quite the right word! Also, I recently finished 'River Man' - and really enjoyed it, bar the final few pages. I do enjoy a healthy dose of 'weird' in my horror so while I loved the gradual build of most of the book, the ending felt too, commonplace, almost, for what had gone before. But it's a book that has stayed with me for longer than most so I'm learning an important lesson of not judging a book by my immediate impression upon finishing it!
I only experience these books vicariously through RUclips videos, but have you seen the Plagued By Visions video about how Hogg is the only book he literally couldn't finish?
The most disturbing thing I've read is a short horror story called "A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts". It was written by the British author Charles Birkin, who is responsible for many disturbing stories. It is in his collection The Spawn of Satan. I discovered Birkin's work about twenty years ago, and I was immediately enthralled and bought all of his collections, which I believe were only ever published in paperback. The story I mentioned takes place in a concentration camp, and is mind-blowingly distressing and unforgettable.
I think you and I have a very similar idea of what constitutes a truly disturbing book. That's why I'm recommending these: The Last Thing to Burn by Will Dean (excellent on audio) and The First Day of Spring by Nancy Tucker (also excellent on audio). Neither are technically in the horror genre, but they belong there imo. Edit: If I didn't recommend Birdman on another video on this topic, I have to agree with that too, though the 2 I've listed here are even more disturbing in my mind.
I’m curious about how you can read these? I tried Notice as I found it for free on the internet, but I couldn’t continue reading. It’s like the story gets in my head and gives my life an almost unmanageable twist.
I think I find them cathartic in a way, as if exposing myself to horror and then being able to put it aside makes me stronger, as well as more empathetic
Hey Olly, I have a couple more disturbing books to recommend to you. "Winter In Maine" by Gerard Donovan, it is beautifully written and very disturbing. "The Kindly Ones" by Jonathan Littell, a novel about an aging nazi recalling his crimes. Guaranteed to get under your skin, but also just an incredible book by any measure. Lastly, a short but haunting memoir: "The Periodic Table" by Primo Levi. Have you read any of these? Are any already on your list?
Hey - no, I haven't read any of those, but a number of people have mentioned The Kindly Ones, so I am adding that to my list. I have another Levi book I'll be reading soon. Thanks so much!
The Groomer put me off any kind of horror for almost a month, and I don’t shy away from extreme horror. My 14yo daughter want to read My Dark Vanessa (thanks TikTok). I usually don’t censor what my kids read, but I told her that I wanted to read it first. I had no desire to read it previously. The things I do for my kids…
Eeek - okay I'll bear that in mind. And similarly my (also 14 yo) son suggested to me the other day that we watch The Man Behind the Sun which is supposed to be one of the most brutally horrific and disturbing films ever made. I just said no :D
@@CriminOllyBlog I’ve never heard of that movie,but at least he doesn’t want to watch A Serbian Film. Edit: I looked up that movie-oh hell no. Way too real.
Olly there is a youtuber who discussed this book in length even showing excerpts from the book "the Cows" because she did not want people to buy this book. I crossed it off my list because of her. I normally frown up on give aways but not in this circumstance.
I’m having a trashy book break after reading Notice, Poking Holes, Let’s play at the Adams, and Hogg. I’m currently enjoying Andrew Ridgeley Wham George and Me 😂👏🏻 Ian McEwans Enduring Love was a great book I’d recommend
There's one book I've been considering suggesting for ages. The reason I haven't is that I really don't think you'd find it disturbing as such. The book in question is 'A Feast Unknown' by Philip José Farmer, which is a pulp pastiche, featuring thinly disguised versions of Tarzan & Doc Savage. Published in 1969, it goes to places in it's examination of the connection between sex & violence that many of his fans just weren't ready for. There were 2 sequels, 'Lord of the Trees' & 'The Mad Goblin' that were much less controversial. Some readers have a problem with the first book even now, although it's not as shocking to most modern readers. I love it, but I'm a huge Farmer fan, and not easily shocked.
@@CriminOllyBlog Farmer is an interesting rabbit hole to go exploring in. I read his fictional biography, 'Tarzan Alive' way back in the mid-70s, and never has a book cost me so much money. He built a family tree, based on a select number of famous fictional characters having been irradiated by the meteor which genuinely did fall near the village of Wold Newton in 1795. This affected those present, and all of their progeny, who eventually became the great heroes (and villains) of fiction. It was folloed up with 'Doc Savage: His Apocalyptic Life'. After reading those books, I would pick up anything I could find that featured any of that fascinating, extended family tree of extraordinary characters. Farmer's work within what came to be known as the Wold Newton Family is always fun to read, and has led to so many others dipping their toes into the same pool. To the extent that not all are officially part of the universe, because they contradict information found in others, which led to those being considered alternate universe stories. 'The Feast Unknown', and it's sequels weren't originally part of the universe, because the real Tarzan & Doc savage were already in there, but Farmer had a 4th book in mind - 'The Monster on Hold', which neatly crossed it over (via the use of the multiverse concept, long before it became fashionable) and tied them together, with a bunch of his other books, and the works that inspired them. 'The Monster on Hold' wasn't finished, but Meteor House, the publisher that was set up after Farmer passed, has been doing astonishingly good work in getting Farmer's unfinished works completed, by authors who knew, or were related to Farmer. You may get the impression that I am rather enthusiastic about this subject. :)
Have you read Perdido Street Station by China Miéville? It is solidly sci fi steampunk, but there are some disturbing scenes. The one that sticks out is this woman who was found guilty of murdering her child, so her punishment is to have her dead child's hands fleshcrafted onto her face. There is some disturbing psychological scenes as well. It is a wild ride!
I've read The Cement Garden. It has stayed with me and one of the reasons I have a love/hate relationship with Ian McEwan. I've also ready MDV, and it was so awful I simply had to keep on reading until it ended. - 📚MJ
I have read everything you talked about except for "Notice". When I think of disturbing...I find more disgusting than anything!!! I read "Woom"... again, disgusting than disturbing!!! Always on the look for others to add to my collection!!! 😜
If you fancy mixing things up a bit with a non fiction book you could try Happy Like Murderers by Gordon Burn. It’s about the West’s, and while hard to describe it’s nothing like the usual true crime books out there, it’s written in a very literary style. It’s relentlessly disturbing, and you can’t just walk away from it with the thought that it’s the product of someone’s imagination.
I'm deliberately keeping non-fiction off the list, because it feel like a whole different kind of thing. But that is a book I've been intrigued by for a while. That was one of the first cases of this kind that I remember being really aware of through the news and it holds a certain fascination as a result. Thanks for the recommendation!
Iam McEwan wrote Atonement, which is a fantastic novel, one of the best novels by a contemporary author in my opinion. I also read On Chesil Beach, not quite as good as Atonement but actually it was rather disturbing. I have The Cement Garden on my list. I just picked up Child of God and plan to read it this month. Looking forward to that one, since I read The Road, and No Country for Old Men and both were excellent, and had disturbing elements. I think I mentioned Lolita on another video, certainly a "transgressive" book but whether or not it is disturbing I suppose depends on your reaction to the main character's peculiar obsession with young girls. In general, Lolita is not graphic and has substantial literary merit. I recently re-read One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest and found it to be quite disturbing. I also note that you don't seem to have war novels on your list, and there are a few of these that I found to be disturbing including the classic All Quiet on the Western Front (fictional but based on the author's experience). In addition, With the Old Breed: At Peleliu and Okinawa is a non-fictional, graphic account of what it was like for the marines to fight in the Pacific theater of WWII. The Rape of Nanking by Iris Chang, and Hiroshima by John Hersey are also non-fiction but horrifically disturbing. Perhaps non-fiction is beyond the scope of your channel but I thought I would mention these. Getting back to fiction, Blindness by Jose Saramago is a disturbing account of a pandemic where everyone in society goes blind and the authorities react with unspeakable atrocities in a futile attempt to control the outbreak; it may have some relevance to the current situation. Sorry for the long comment, I'm enjoying your expoloration of disturbing works and even though I don't plan to read most of them perhaps you will convince me!
Thank you for the really informative comment! I am deliberately leaving non fic off the list (it feels like a different thing somehow) but Blindness is definitely a book that intrigues me. I agree that Lolita is excellent
I'm new to reading this genre and have read maybe 10 that were recommended on this channel. So far none have struck me like No Country for Old Men so I entirely agree with you.
Talked to a woman today who had just bought Tender is the Flesh. We had a laugh about how it's a great book once you can get past the whole cannibalism thing 😂 120 Days really could've gone unpublished...
Geek Love for me is a good disturbing book. Hard topics very well written. In terms of disability... We have to understand is the 80''s disability was still a tabu but I feel she manage it well, then again I am fortunate that I do not have a visible disability so I do not speak in the name of those who have it.
I don’t know the history of your running gag, but I agree that it’s all right. It shocked me when it ended and I felt kind of sorry for a rapist/murderer with absolutely no redeeming qualities.
@@Mattblaster0 I decided every time somebody talks about Hogg on RUclips, I throw out that line and see if anyone recognizes I'm talking about Denny! You did. This all started with Juan at Plagued by Visions.
@@WilliamsLibrary I just discovered Juan last week and have been binge-watching his disturbing books lists. I'm not fully caught up so I don't know yet if he ever read Hogg.
Wait wait Olly have you read another Mo Hayder book The Treatment? I wouldn’t add to your disturbing list but a great read indeed. And pretty messed up content.
No, I’ve only read one book by her - the book of sand that was published posthumously under the name Theo Claire. I do have a bunch of her books on my shelves though (including The Treatment I think…)
@@CriminOllyBlog I read Treatment shortly before her passing. It was a difficult read for me so I haven’t searched out any more. Looking forward to your thoughts on Birdman.
Never read Hubert S. jr, I have "the room" somewhere , I hear he's an amazing author looking forward to your review. Also if your going to read my dark vanessa then you might want to try "tampa". its the other way around in this book where a female teacher grooms young teenage boys. Mind you I didn't find it particularly disturbing partly because I think guys/males have a different perspective on this plus I don't have children. While I heard a lot of women found it disturbing.
I recently read The Slob. Definitely up there as one of the most disgusting things I’ve read. At one point I put the book down and said to myself “what am I doing?” 😂
Probably doesn't belong on this list, I recently found The island of Dr Moreau by HG Wells surprisingly disturbing. It makes sense in historical context because it was written as an IRL anti-vivisection book. Two other honorable mentions would be "Earthlings" by Sayaka Murata and "The Killing Forest" by Sara Blaedel
Geek Love is a fantastic book! I'm excited to hear your thoughts on that one. I wouldn't call it disturbing so much as DARK. Gorgeously written as well, it kind of draws you in to the point that you don't realize you are reading a horror novel until it's too late.
Hi, I don’t know if you heard about French author Virginie Despentes, her books are quite disturbing, more psychologically than extreme, especially her first one. Titled baise-moi translated F… me or rape me. More so when you take into account what she went through and what happened to the main actresses after the movie adaptation was released. Loving your channel by the way
And speaking of incest...a good companion piece to the Heather Lewis book might be Christine Angot's Incest. It sort of has that same autobiographical or more immediate quality to it. And, yes, I know you're on the book wagon. I like Ian McEwan and The Cement Garden is my favorite of his books that I have read. Disturbing, yes, but also incredibly sad because as bad as the characters get you understand how they got there.
Yeah the Angot book is one I have considered reading over the years. Maybe I'll get it if I finish my book buying challenge before my disturbing books project!
Honestly that last third of the book was such a disappointment. I felt very sad for the sister mostly and thought the family stuff was quite interesting but the actual River Man bit of the story really didn't do it for me.
Many who have experienced trauma feel a kind of call to the void where they seek out abuse that is familiar. Notice sounds like it exemplifies that well.
Yeah I think it really does.
It's explained well under the psychological theory of "Relational Templates", how we are raised and the relationships we grow up with form templates and frameworks of how we see ourselves and how we seek out relationship dynamics etc, often it's unconscious patterns we fall into without wanting to or even realising.
@@inkswamped Thank you! That's fascinating
I am enjoying this series on disturbing books. I am one to recommend adding to your list from a rather surprising source - a novel prize for literature winner. The book is ‘The Piano Teacher’ by Elfrieda Jelinek, a psychologically and sexually disturbing story.
Thank you! I'll have to look int that one! Glad you're enjoying the series
I'm sure you've read some Joyce Carol Oates, but I would love your thoughts on First Love, which I found to be uniquely disquieting. Also LOVE The Cement Garden.
Loving the uploads you been doing recently. Discovered you through Plagued By Visions and decided to subscribe and join your discord and I gotta say that your content is really good and I love how diverse it all is. Loving the series so far as well as all your other uploads (not disturbing book related).
I myself really enjoy exploring disturbing literature and here are a few recommendations that I have for disturbing books to read for I would love to hear your thoughts on them (of course you don’t have to read them or anything if you don’t want to, just keep up the great work my man!):
1. The Bighead
2. Haunted
3. Off Season
4. Less Than Zero
5. No Longer Human (more depressing than disturbing)
6. The Rape Of Nanking (it’s nonfiction)
Those are just a few of some disturbing books I have and they are all disturbing in their own messed up ways. I highly recommend Less Than Zero even if it’s not for like a disturbing books challenge or anything because it’s really amazing. Keep up the amazing work and take care!
Thank you! Really glad you're enjoying the channel!
That's an interesting list!
1. I do need to read this
2. This is actually on my list to read for the project, I just forgot to mention it in this video because I'm an idiot
3. Read - agree it's great
4. Read - and agree it's great but I do need to reread it as I was a teenager first time around. I might reread and compare to his new novel which sounds quiet similar
5. Have heard great things about that
6. I'm deliberately not covering non fiction in the project, but that is an event/atrocity I want to read more on.
Thanks again, really appreciate the suggestions and the support!
We have a very similar tbr! I think the one I was most anticipating was The End of Alice.
Pillowman sounds intriguing!
Yeah I have heard so many good/awful about the End of Alice!
I'm not intrepid enough to read any of the books mentioned, but for some reason I enjoy hearing about them? Great videos. 👍
Surprised no one's mentioned Frisk, by Dennis Cooper yet. That one left me scarred. I'll never look at a windmill the same way again.
Cool to see Birdman by Mo Hayder on the list. A very good read, that one. I really like that author’s works.
I'm really looking forward to it
Thank you for the highlights! Sorry for all my posting!
Never apologise for leaving comments! I love them!
The Room IS disturbing. Good luck this month. I’ll be praying for your sanity. I read Uzumaki, and went out and bought a bunch of Junji Ito so I may be stuck there for the moment.
ha! Thank you!
enjoyed WOOM very sad and disturbing but a really well done threading of an anthology
I've still to get to tha one, but looking forward to it
I actually have a copy of Hogg. But have been postponing reading it for almost a year now due to the nature of the book. I “snuck read” a few pages here and there and it made me squeamish and intrigued at the same time, which is what disturbed me. Perhaps I will pick it up again and “read along” with your group in Discord.
Btw- It wasn’t easy to get a hardcopy in the US.
It definitely feels like having companions for a read of Hogg is a good idea!
"and I still don't know whether or not I really want to read it or not...." that sounds truly disturbing...
LOL yeah
When I say I've read The Killing Lessons, I mean: I skipped over parts of the book because they bothered me so ... but the thriller part was so good, I did finish it (but not those parts).
It really was horrible wasn't it!
Have you been suggested Tampa by Alissa Nutting? It is about a depraved, sociopathic woman who is a teacher and has "relationships" with her young male students. The writing is really good, and it really puts you in this character's head, which is what made it so disturbing to me.
I just finished Wax and Wane by Saoirse Ni Chiaragain, about a couple where the husband falls down a far right rabbit hole and finds werewolves at the bottom. I thought it was so good, and really relevant.
Yes, that has been suggested and I think I’ll add it to the list when I’m off my book buying ban and can get it.
And Wax and Wane sounds great! Will also add that to my list
I'm going to guess you won't find Geek Love disturbing at all. Interesting, but not really disturbing, unless I'm misremembering. As for Hogg ... I'm a big Delany fan, but I don't think I know anyone who's a fan of Hogg. I don't think I've even read any excerpts. Good luck!
I am increasingly daunted by Hogg LOL
I was going to recommend Hubert Selby Jr as a writer of disturbing books, but I see you already have him covered! Not up for The Room, but if you ever (re-?)read Requiem For. A Dream or Last Exit To Brooklyn, I’d definitely be interested in reading along.
I didn’t find Geek Love disturbing, but it’s a book I still think about a lot in terms of power dynamics even though I read it years ago. I really rate it.
Also interested in how you find The End of Alice as AM Holmes is a fascinating interviewee and I’m curious about their entire body of work.
Bon chance!
Thank you! I can certainly see myself reading more Selby Jr!
I’ve only read My Dark Vanessa. That one was tough to get through! Very curious about others on this list but not sure if I can handle it! 😅
I'm not sure I can handle them either!
Mo Hayder also wrote the treatment which went into become quite a disturbing film.
Yes, hope to read that one at some point too
@@CriminOllyBlog The film was quite disturbing and difficult to watch as it deals with issues of child abuse but it’s still quite compelling story
I just knew by the title of Cows that I wouldn't be into it because, obviously, cattle and difficult women sprang to mind and from what you just said I'm glad I went with my instinct on that. Between watching a couple of your videos today I ran across Kali's song by Dan Simmons and, although I have read it already, I stuck it on while I was doing stuff (it's on RUclips and I know its not nice but I have really chronic insomnia and I will occasionally stick things on just so I don't have to deal with a physical book, usually they're books uploaded by authors but, my copy of this is at my sisters where all my books eventually go because she has a whole room library at home in Scotland). It's as good as I remember, I am going to get a hold of some on your list and will probably get the Discord thing although I am a really fast reader I may give it a go reading along with you guys, which sounds interesting. Tender is the Flesh? I think we had that already with Soylent Green ? I have read some of Jon Athan's stuff and it's not for me. I wish I could remember that Nick Cutter ones title, it's got a weird house like House of Leaves and the parasitoid wasps. I loved that it was horrible but in a good way lol!
It's been ages since I read that Simmons book - I remember it being good!
I always enjoy your videos!
Glad you like them!
Highly recommend The Cement Garden. I would also recommend two i just read that were quite disturbing, Where I End and My Heart Hemmed In. I've read excepts of Hogg and oh my i can't do it.
People keep saying that about Hogg... I'm a bit scared! Thanks for the recs!
I read Tender is the Flesh in 2022. It was definitely one of the most disturbing book I've read, but I'm not very seasoned in more extreme horror books. I love that literature, as a whole, can affect people in a variety of ways. For me, I think the hardest part of Tender is the Flesh was the description. I definitely had to put it down a few times 🤢😂 The only other book that I found to be extremely disturbing was A Child Called "It" by Dave Pelzer, but it may not really fit into your list. It's a nonfiction book about child abuse and it's more disturbing in a heartbreaking way than anything. Very excited to read Gone to See the River Man for Kelsi's book club this month!
Yeah a number of people have suggested A Child Called It, but I'm reluctant to read it (or any non-fiction) for the project because it seems exploitative somehow. Not saying the book is by any means, but just doesn't quite feel right for what I am looking to do here.
I read a child called It in middle school and out of all the books I've read it's been the worst for me. That was a terrible read for my kid brain. Ugh so sad!!!
I really enjoyed My Dark Vanessa. I think the most disturbing thing for me was how I related to her in that that could have easily been me had one of my teachers been that way inclined. Overall not very disturbing though, I thought, but an interesting read from the 'Lolita' perspective.
Yeah it does sound like an interesting book. I've only heard good things about it
I found Tender is the Flesh pretty disturbing. I am vegetarian and the thought of any animal being slaughtered is disturbing to me already, so humans was worse. I REALLY enjoyed Pretty Girls, read it in 1 day but wasn't that disturbed by it to be honest.
Oh good to hear about Pretty Girls - I've really liked all the Karin Slaughter books I've read in the past
How do you know if someone is a Vegetarian? They will tell you
@benjackson1077 🤦🏻♀️ I think it’s perfectly warranted in the context of books about slaughterhouses 🙄 Btw, how do you know someone is a bit of a mean old grump? 🤔👹😂
I just got the audio for Bridman from my library! Have you read Laws of The Skies? Very disturbing but beautifully written! I hated Woom so much 😂
I have read Laws of the Skies - such a fantastic, unique book! Hope we both enjoy Birdman!
I have read "the Story of O" many years ago and I found her story to be deeply sad.
It does sound like an interesting book
Abuse can cling to you like a wet blanket. As horrific as abuse can be, it feels familiar, and therefore you seek it. I was an abuse survivor, and it's always there. The reason I kept straying towards it was that I had a crushing fear of the new. The getting out, and the new life ahead. I felt that I deserved it. That i had must of done something wrong. So I kept slapped around, because it was FAMILIAR. It took 10 years to get out, but I did do it.
So pleased you managed to escape that horrible cycle, Jenna
Olly, have you read Johnny Got His Gun? That's one I'm literally scared to read. It might destroy me.
No, but that's one I really do need to try
Enjoying this series!
Thanks, Crystal!
For me the most disturbing book is Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door and The End of Alice by A.M Holmes. Ketchum’s book is infamous for how upsetting it is and it deserves every bit of praise it has received. Alice is , as far as I know, is kind of unknown, but it smacks you hard.
Pretty Girls was surprisingly shocking for me. I enjoyed it a lot.
Yeah The Girl Next Door is incredibly dark.
Loving the darkness vibes Olly.
Cheers!
You listed Hogg twice in the description, which to me is very appropriate. I’ve read a number of the books on your list so far and I think that and Cows are the most disgusting books I’ve read, but I didn’t think they were that disturbing. They seemed so deliberately over the top that I didn’t feel like I connected with the characters at all.
Oh thanks, have corrected that!
And your comments make me feel like I might actually be able to get through it
@@CriminOllyBlog It’s very gross, like Cows but even worse, but I felt like it had the effect, intentionally or unintentionally, of dehumanizing every character. It ends up just feeling like a splatter movie where the gore is so gross and over the top that it ends up being kind of funny. I honestly think it’s a good book, but there isn’t a single person in my life that I would recommend it to.
@@Mattblaster0 That closing sentence us great!
"Monster" by Matt Shaw... deffo give that 1 a go!
A few people have recommended his work
Feel current with this series. However, a bit of discussion on the differences between "disturbing" and "disgusting" might be helpful.
Ah good shout! Yes I'm making notes on different kinds of disturbing book and that's a distinction I'll definitely talk about.
Very interesting to hear your thoughts on this project so far Olly - one I think you're very brave for even starting!
I've only read two from your list, as I tend to avoid 'extreme horror' and the more disturbing, 'real life' books like 'Notice' for my own mental health. But I did read 'Exquisite Corpse' a number of years ago (during a slightly overwrought, late teens, goth phase 😂) and remember being fascinated by it, if 'enjoyed' is not quite the right word!
Also, I recently finished 'River Man' - and really enjoyed it, bar the final few pages. I do enjoy a healthy dose of 'weird' in my horror so while I loved the gradual build of most of the book, the ending felt too, commonplace, almost, for what had gone before. But it's a book that has stayed with me for longer than most so I'm learning an important lesson of not judging a book by my immediate impression upon finishing it!
Yeah, I really enjoyed the weird/eerie elements of it too! Exquisite Corpse seems like a great book for overwrought tee goths :D
I only experience these books vicariously through RUclips videos, but have you seen the Plagued By Visions video about how Hogg is the only book he literally couldn't finish?
I have. God knows what I am letting myself in for.
I just ordered a book called Scorch Atlas and I've been told it is nauseatingly disgusting and completely disturbed.
The most disturbing thing I've read is a short horror story called "A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts". It was written by the British author Charles Birkin, who is responsible for many disturbing stories. It is in his collection The Spawn of Satan. I discovered Birkin's work about twenty years ago, and I was immediately enthralled and bought all of his collections, which I believe were only ever published in paperback. The story I mentioned takes place in a concentration camp, and is mind-blowingly distressing and unforgettable.
I've not heard of that - will have to look it up!
I think you and I have a very similar idea of what constitutes a truly disturbing book. That's why I'm recommending these:
The Last Thing to Burn by Will Dean (excellent on audio) and The First Day of Spring by Nancy Tucker (also excellent on audio).
Neither are technically in the horror genre, but they belong there imo.
Edit: If I didn't recommend Birdman on another video on this topic, I have to agree with that too, though the 2 I've listed here are even more disturbing in my mind.
Thanks for the recommendations!
Does anyone have a copy of Notice that they would be willing to sell?
Exquisite corpse is one of my favorites.
It was great
I’m curious about how you can read these? I tried Notice as I found it for free on the internet, but I couldn’t continue reading. It’s like the story gets in my head and gives my life an almost unmanageable twist.
I think I find them cathartic in a way, as if exposing myself to horror and then being able to put it aside makes me stronger, as well as more empathetic
Into The Wolves Den by Jon Athan was
fairly disturbing as well The Groomer. Looking forwards to your thoughts Olly.
Cheers, Asif! Will see what I think of The Groomer soon
@@CriminOllyBlog it may require several trigger warnings with your forthcoming review I suspect Olly! Keep up the great work my friend.🙂👍
Hey Olly, I have a couple more disturbing books to recommend to you. "Winter In Maine" by Gerard Donovan, it is beautifully written and very disturbing. "The Kindly Ones" by Jonathan Littell, a novel about an aging nazi recalling his crimes. Guaranteed to get under your skin, but also just an incredible book by any measure. Lastly, a short but haunting memoir: "The Periodic Table" by Primo Levi. Have you read any of these? Are any already on your list?
Hey - no, I haven't read any of those, but a number of people have mentioned The Kindly Ones, so I am adding that to my list.
I have another Levi book I'll be reading soon. Thanks so much!
The Good Daughter by Karin Slaughter was really disturbing for me. Never read Pretty Girls.
I that one on my kindle!
What are the chances that any of these will be at one of my local libraries?
The Groomer put me off any kind of horror for almost a month, and I don’t shy away from extreme horror. My 14yo daughter want to read My Dark Vanessa (thanks TikTok). I usually don’t censor what my kids read, but I told her that I wanted to read it first. I had no desire to read it previously. The things I do for my kids…
Eeek - okay I'll bear that in mind.
And similarly my (also 14 yo) son suggested to me the other day that we watch The Man Behind the Sun which is supposed to be one of the most brutally horrific and disturbing films ever made. I just said no :D
@@CriminOllyBlog I’ve never heard of that movie,but at least he doesn’t want to watch A Serbian Film.
Edit: I looked up that movie-oh hell no. Way too real.
@@ering2467 LOL yeah exactly
Olly there is a youtuber who discussed this book in length even showing excerpts from the book "the Cows" because she did not want people to buy this book. I crossed it off my list because of her. I normally frown up on give aways but not in this circumstance.
It really is pretty foul! You're best off not reading it
Which RUclipsr was that, if you don't mind?
I’m having a trashy book break after reading Notice, Poking Holes, Let’s play at the Adams, and Hogg. I’m currently enjoying Andrew Ridgeley Wham George and Me 😂👏🏻 Ian McEwans Enduring Love was a great book I’d recommend
My god, please tell me you didn't read them back to back!
@@CriminOllyBlog yes I did 😅
@@amya8155 Oh crikey, I'm amazed you survived.
read a few of these! and currently reading Geek Love which i'm finding really interesting. sian
I'm looking forward to that one!
There's one book I've been considering suggesting for ages. The reason I haven't is that I really don't think you'd find it disturbing as such. The book in question is 'A Feast Unknown' by Philip José Farmer, which is a pulp pastiche, featuring thinly disguised versions of Tarzan & Doc Savage. Published in 1969, it goes to places in it's examination of the connection between sex & violence that many of his fans just weren't ready for. There were 2 sequels, 'Lord of the Trees' & 'The Mad Goblin' that were much less controversial. Some readers have a problem with the first book even now, although it's not as shocking to most modern readers. I love it, but I'm a huge Farmer fan, and not easily shocked.
That sounds interesting! I’ve actually never read any Farmer, but have always meant too, his pastiche stuff in particular
@@CriminOllyBlog Farmer is an interesting rabbit hole to go exploring in. I read his fictional biography, 'Tarzan Alive' way back in the mid-70s, and never has a book cost me so much money. He built a family tree, based on a select number of famous fictional characters having been irradiated by the meteor which genuinely did fall near the village of Wold Newton in 1795. This affected those present, and all of their progeny, who eventually became the great heroes (and villains) of fiction. It was folloed up with 'Doc Savage: His Apocalyptic Life'.
After reading those books, I would pick up anything I could find that featured any of that fascinating, extended family tree of extraordinary characters.
Farmer's work within what came to be known as the Wold Newton Family is always fun to read, and has led to so many others dipping their toes into the same pool. To the extent that not all are officially part of the universe, because they contradict information found in others, which led to those being considered alternate universe stories.
'The Feast Unknown', and it's sequels weren't originally part of the universe, because the real Tarzan & Doc savage were already in there, but Farmer had a 4th book in mind - 'The Monster on Hold', which neatly crossed it over (via the use of the multiverse concept, long before it became fashionable) and tied them together, with a bunch of his other books, and the works that inspired them.
'The Monster on Hold' wasn't finished, but Meteor House, the publisher that was set up after Farmer passed, has been doing astonishingly good work in getting Farmer's unfinished works completed, by authors who knew, or were related to Farmer.
You may get the impression that I am rather enthusiastic about this subject. :)
Have you read Perdido Street Station by China Miéville? It is solidly sci fi steampunk, but there are some disturbing scenes. The one that sticks out is this woman who was found guilty of murdering her child, so her punishment is to have her dead child's hands fleshcrafted onto her face. There is some disturbing psychological scenes as well. It is a wild ride!
Good lord that does sound disturbing! I actually haven't read that one, but have read The City and the City which I really liked
I've read The Cement Garden. It has stayed with me and one of the reasons I have a love/hate relationship with Ian McEwan. I've also ready MDV, and it was so awful I simply had to keep on reading until it ended. - 📚MJ
That sounds like a recommendation, from a disturbing books POV at least!
@@CriminOllyBlog I would say that I agree with your perception. 🤭
I have read everything you talked about except for "Notice". When I think of disturbing...I find more disgusting than anything!!! I read "Woom"... again, disgusting than disturbing!!! Always on the look for others to add to my collection!!! 😜
There's definitely a dividing line between disturbing and disgusting, but one that is often very hard to pinpoint
@@CriminOllyBlog How very true!!!
I am surprised that Slaughter book is on the list. Read many books by her, this must be an exception then.
Yeah I was too, but it comes up again and again from people
If you fancy mixing things up a bit with a non fiction book you could try Happy Like Murderers by Gordon Burn. It’s about the West’s, and while hard to describe it’s nothing like the usual true crime books out there, it’s written in a very literary style. It’s relentlessly disturbing, and you can’t just walk away from it with the thought that it’s the product of someone’s imagination.
I'm deliberately keeping non-fiction off the list, because it feel like a whole different kind of thing. But that is a book I've been intrigued by for a while. That was one of the first cases of this kind that I remember being really aware of through the news and it holds a certain fascination as a result. Thanks for the recommendation!
@@CriminOllyBlog Definately check this out Olly! It's written in a fiction-way ... making it all the more disturbinbg that it actually happened!!!
Iam McEwan wrote Atonement, which is a fantastic novel, one of the best novels by a contemporary author in my opinion. I also read On Chesil Beach, not quite as good as Atonement but actually it was rather disturbing. I have The Cement Garden on my list. I just picked up Child of God and plan to read it this month. Looking forward to that one, since I read The Road, and No Country for Old Men and both were excellent, and had disturbing elements. I think I mentioned Lolita on another video, certainly a "transgressive" book but whether or not it is disturbing I suppose depends on your reaction to the main character's peculiar obsession with young girls. In general, Lolita is not graphic and has substantial literary merit. I recently re-read One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest and found it to be quite disturbing. I also note that you don't seem to have war novels on your list, and there are a few of these that I found to be disturbing including the classic All Quiet on the Western Front (fictional but based on the author's experience). In addition, With the Old Breed: At Peleliu and Okinawa is a non-fictional, graphic account of what it was like for the marines to fight in the Pacific theater of WWII. The Rape of Nanking by Iris Chang, and Hiroshima by John Hersey are also non-fiction but horrifically disturbing. Perhaps non-fiction is beyond the scope of your channel but I thought I would mention these. Getting back to fiction, Blindness by Jose Saramago is a disturbing account of a pandemic where everyone in society goes blind and the authorities react with unspeakable atrocities in a futile attempt to control the outbreak; it may have some relevance to the current situation. Sorry for the long comment, I'm enjoying your expoloration of disturbing works and even though I don't plan to read most of them perhaps you will convince me!
Thank you for the really informative comment! I am deliberately leaving non fic off the list (it feels like a different thing somehow) but Blindness is definitely a book that intrigues me. I agree that Lolita is excellent
I'm new to reading this genre and have read maybe 10 that were recommended on this channel. So far none have struck me like No Country for Old Men so I entirely agree with you.
No Hayden’s Birdman is a great book. All her stuff is good.
Yeah I am really looking forward to it
Tender in the flesh sounds like a real thing these days and that is my opinion. Sounds very creepy.
It is definitely creepy!
Talked to a woman today who had just bought Tender is the Flesh. We had a laugh about how it's a great book once you can get past the whole cannibalism thing 😂 120 Days really could've gone unpublished...
LOL I love the idea of you both chuckling about the mass farming of humans
Geek Love for me is a good disturbing book. Hard topics very well written. In terms of disability... We have to understand is the 80''s disability was still a tabu but I feel she manage it well, then again I am fortunate that I do not have a visible disability so I do not speak in the name of those who have it.
I’m looking forward to seeing what I make of it
Time for my running gag comment:
Hogg... It's all right!
LOL
I don’t know the history of your running gag, but I agree that it’s all right. It shocked me when it ended and I felt kind of sorry for a rapist/murderer with absolutely no redeeming qualities.
@@Mattblaster0 I decided every time somebody talks about Hogg on RUclips, I throw out that line and see if anyone recognizes I'm talking about Denny! You did. This all started with Juan at Plagued by Visions.
@@WilliamsLibrary I just discovered Juan last week and have been binge-watching his disturbing books lists. I'm not fully caught up so I don't know yet if he ever read Hogg.
Wait wait Olly have you read another Mo Hayder book The Treatment? I wouldn’t add to your disturbing list but a great read indeed. And pretty messed up content.
No, I’ve only read one book by her - the book of sand that was published posthumously under the name Theo Claire. I do have a bunch of her books on my shelves though (including The Treatment I think…)
Wait no. The story is coming back to me. It qualifies for your disturbing list.
@@CriminOllyBlog I read Treatment shortly before her passing. It was a difficult read for me so I haven’t searched out any more. Looking forward to your thoughts on Birdman.
@@elizabethmcfadden466 good to know!
Another good disturbing one is The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things. Pretty messed up, and there is a movie adaptation
I'll have to check that out - thank you!
Never read Hubert S. jr, I have "the room" somewhere , I hear he's an amazing author looking forward to your review. Also if your going to read my dark vanessa then you might want to try "tampa". its the other way around in this book where a female teacher grooms young teenage boys. Mind you I didn't find it particularly disturbing partly because I think guys/males have a different perspective on this plus I don't have children. While I heard a lot of women found it disturbing.
Yeah Tampa is one a few people have suggested, I may well add it to the list soon!
I couldn't finish The Groomer. 😔 Good luck!
Oh dear! The other book I read by the author was certainly graphic
I recently read The Slob. Definitely up there as one of the most disgusting things I’ve read. At one point I put the book down and said to myself “what am I doing?” 😂
Yeah that really is a pretty foul book!
The Haunted Vagina is the weirdest book I ever read but American Psycho was too much and I had to stop.
Read child of God and the room....the melting looks curious.will be googling that.
Yeah that one does sound interesting
💚🖤
Are you on Goodreads?
I am. All my links are here linktr.ee/criminolly
Probably doesn't belong on this list, I recently found The island of Dr Moreau by HG Wells surprisingly disturbing. It makes sense in historical context because it was written as an IRL anti-vivisection book.
Two other honorable mentions would be "Earthlings" by Sayaka Murata and "The Killing Forest" by Sara Blaedel
Oh interesting! I've never read Moreau but I really should
Geek Love is a fantastic book! I'm excited to hear your thoughts on that one. I wouldn't call it disturbing so much as DARK. Gorgeously written as well, it kind of draws you in to the point that you don't realize you are reading a horror novel until it's too late.
I'm really looking forward to it!
Have you read American Psycho? It really is a comedy, but the violence is quite grotesque and repellant.
Yes! Completely agree on both counts
Hi, I don’t know if you heard about French author Virginie Despentes, her books are quite disturbing, more psychologically than extreme, especially her first one. Titled baise-moi translated F… me or rape me. More so when you take into account what she went through and what happened to the main actresses after the movie adaptation was released.
Loving your channel by the way
Glad you’re enjoying the channel! I’ve seen the movie of Baise Moi - do need to read the book!
And speaking of incest...a good companion piece to the Heather Lewis book might be Christine Angot's Incest. It sort of has that same autobiographical or more immediate quality to it. And, yes, I know you're on the book wagon.
I like Ian McEwan and The Cement Garden is my favorite of his books that I have read. Disturbing, yes, but also incredibly sad because as bad as the characters get you understand how they got there.
Personally, I thought Alexander Stuart's 'The War Zone' was more disturbing than 'The Cement Garden' - but they're both good books.
Yeah the Angot book is one I have considered reading over the years. Maybe I'll get it if I finish my book buying challenge before my disturbing books project!
I don;t know why I would want to read these books. I feel I have had enough trauma in my life Olly, I'll leave it to you.
Hope things are okay for you at the moment, Paul
I read Woom. I did not find it disturbing. It was not a favorite either.
Yeah I've heard very mixed things about it
I hated River Man. It came off to me as low camp. Dude should write hiking books. The real horror was that it was sold as horror.
Honestly that last third of the book was such a disappointment. I felt very sad for the sister mostly and thought the family stuff was quite interesting but the actual River Man bit of the story really didn't do it for me.
It was certainly less of a horror book than I expected, but I did like it quite a bit
1
No I haven't read any of these. Well you're not an idiot but it is rather .......hmmm....yeh nah....
LOL