Saying The Thing I've Been Too Afraid To Say
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 22 авг 2024
- Subscribe to join the Camily! If you enjoyed this video don't forget to give it a like! Click the bell to join the notification gang!
Shop Our Merch!
teespring.com/stores/camandfam
Follow Our Other Social Medias!
My Instagram: / camandfam
Collette & Delilah's Instagram: / coco.and.de. .
My Twitter: / camandfam1
My TikTok: www.tiktok.com...
Intro Music: "If I Told You" Performed by Lois Mahalia, Written by EJ Cox
itunes.apple.co...
Contact Me! (Business Inquiries Only)
Email: coastroadMGT@gmail.com
Again, a very important and critical message to young people. Just like the Gabby Petito case, life is not what it appears to be on these social media forums. Domestic violence is never OK and should never be hidden!
Also you should NEVER be ashamed to admit this is your situation!!!
yes! Thank you! People out here in the comments in favor of protecting abusers and people staying silent. That’s gets us nowhere and promotes people to stay in domestic violence situations!
@@CherrrrBear abusive relationships are complicated. You want to make it work even tho you’re in hell. It’s hard to explain and it’s hard to leave esp when you’re married with kids and sharing your life on the internet. Nothing is ever as it seems.
@@CherrrrBear RUclips money
I also think DV amongst youth isn't talked about enough. From age 13-17 I had 3 different bfs who were all physically abusive. I also think sexual assult between minors doesn't get enough attention when in my experience they were the main offenders throughout my childhood.
As someone who went through an abusive relationship myself I would have never guessed you went through abuse...but that's exactly what happened to me everyone around me knew this guy and loved him and even some of my friends didn't believe me when i told them what happened...I felt like I lost everything! Thank you for being strong and sharing your story, even the hardest parts because there are women and men out there who truely need to hear this! ❤❤
Exactly no one believes
I’m happy your out of that your so strong💜💜
@@Makennaj.180 Thank you so much 💗 I'm now happily married to a good man with a baby on the way so I couldn't ask for anything more!
Same here! Sending you love 🫶🏻
My 31 yrs old son was abused by his old girlfriend. He used to be such a confident person someone who could do anything he put his mind to. Now he has lost all his confidence. No one knew what was happening. This girl was valedictorian of her high school class. And absolutely beautiful. He has tried to get help but her words are stuck in his head. It breaks my heart that someone would treat my son like that. Men can get abused too
As a recovering addict myself, you hit the nail on the head!! We are not ourselves under the influence! Sooo many addicts are amazing humans, but the drugs bring out a terrible dark and scary/dangerous side. I’m so proud of you for speaking up! So proud of you for seeing it for what it really is. I can only imagine how hard this is to talk about...for you personally and having to relive it, and also for fear of his loved ones seeing this and being hurt by it or not wanting to believe it. You are so wise, stay on this path girl! You are doing great!!❤️
Absolutely. I have a family member who is an addict. He is such a great and fun person when he is sober. It all gets drown out by the drugs, when he falls back into it. It's saddening to see. Despite all of the things he has done, he is still loved and we miss having his sober self around. He is still a good person when he is himself.
So true! Some of the most special people I have met in my 47 yrs on Earth have been addicts. Some are very hurt, broken, individuals, who can't cope with the pain in their soul, without a substance to numb it. It's heartbreaking to witness them destroy themselves, just praying they could see themselves in the light that I do, before it's too late.
For too many, that truth isn't revealed to them, before their light is burned out.
🔥😔🔥
@@dogs5899 do you use with her or watch her use? If not, then don’t sit there and say she uses. Or do you mean smoke pot because geez I hope that’s not what you’re talking about.
it must’ve been hard to forgive him, but I’m glad you reminded us you want us to remember him as a good person.💙
How did he exactly abuse her
@@itsgalaxy2330 most likely verbally if anything, addicts _can_ get defensive and selfish and feel cornered when confronted with the truth and problems. there could have also been physical or mental. the main point is though, regardless of what type of abuse cam endured, is that addiction can severely change and warp a person and turn them into something you could never imagine.
@@itsgalaxy2330 probably verbally.
@@CorgiMom007 he also did a violent thing
@@itsgalaxy2330 she said he put a knife to her throat and other stuff.
I'm going through this RIGHT now. I lost my husband 2 weeks ago, today. But he was an addict. And I've been battling feeling guilty for how I'm grieving. I kept so much private to protect him. I stopped talking to everyone. Deleted my Facebook. So now it's hard, I'm sad and hurt that he's gone, but I have that feeling of being able to finally breathe again. It's so challenging. There's the feeling of relief that he's no longer hurting and he can't hurt me anymore, but the deep sadness that he didn't recover and become free on this side of heaven. Today I've been really really struggling with this, feeling alone, so this video came out at the perfect time.
I am so sorry for your loss, you are not alone, just know there is help. Talk to someone, much love ❤️
There are some excellent resources now. Hoping you will get the help you so deserve & need.
~Know that there are those of us who are ‘with you’ in prayers. We love you & want you to be well!
Thank you guys. Been doing my best to process everything. I am thankful to have a really good friend who lets me vent and is a good sounding board
Sending lots of love 🤍
Im sorry that happened, I hope your well.
As a survivor myself from someone who was on pills
This hit home.
No one speaks about the leaving or how to rebuild your life what a phenomenal human being you are Cameron. I’m an author myself, and wish you the best.
The way you handled telling your story and honoring your husband and making people know the goodness of who Landon really was beneath his struggles while not lessening your own experience was quite telling of the person you are. You have a way with words to speak the truth. ♥️
You are so incredibly well spoken and respectful towards Landon. While this shocks me, you need to tell your story. So many people love you and care for you and I want you to know that we are here from you.
@@CherrrrBear I think it’s cool your are a doctor ☺️☺️!!! That’s wild!!
@@CherrrrBear drugs absolutely can make you abuse people
@@CherrrrBear Xanax can most definitely make you an angry person if taking the wrong dose and if it’s used improperly.
And I think it’s important that she did it in a respectful manner because he’s not here to defend himself and share his side of the story. There are always 3 sides to a story , hers , his and the truth.her side will be the only side to be ever be told .
I’ve watched from the beginning and I promise to see the love and light in Landon while understanding the dark place he was in. I care so much for you and your family, you have truly helped me through so much that you wouldn’t be able to imagine. Hearing your story with depression and Landon’s as well, I have been building a healthier mindset as I was (and still sometimes am) in an extremely dark way of thinking. I thank you, I won’t be able to thank you enough.
I’m sure this book is gonna help a lot of people. I truly hope and wish that you publish it. So proud of you❤️
Same I would definitely read her book!
i would love to read this as well. ❤️
i’ll buy the book the minute its out!
You are so brave cam cape on being a good mom for 2 Beautiful girls
Has she ever said if she is sharing her book and if so, when it’s coming out? I would assume by her sharing the writing process with us that she IS planning on sharing it. However, I’m now sure.
Cam you speak so eloquently and calmly, never guessed anything like that was going on, you are a strong woman and mama with so much trauma to deal with. You can do it… proud of you xx
Can't imagine the bravery it took you to put this out here. But I admire you so greatly for doing so. And I hope you remember that you truly are helping, and will continue to help, so many people. You are an amazingly intelligent person which can be told through just watching your videos, and that says a lot. Keep doing what you do, I wish you nothing but wellness and love.
Almost 2 years? This feels surreal... I am so sorry for you and your kids. Feel hugged 💛💛
I know right. I remember hearing the video of Landon passing when I was about 14 and I remember having a panic attack after getting half way through the video. I was extremely trigger prone at the time as I was not yet able to manage my panic disorder and depression. I really felt like I was both him and her at the same time. She’s so strong
the way u worded it it sounds rude
@@racoon1203 no it doesn't. Cameron is a piece of attention seeking crap
@@racoon1203 no it doesn’t, get over it
@@racoon1203 wtf are u saying no it doesnt
I so appreciate your honesty Cam.
I was in an abusive relationship with an addict too. I only stayed for as long as I did because I knew that he was actually a good person, who was just ill.
It took a wise mentor saying straight out to me that I was being abused, for me to leave.
I too am picking up the pieces of my life, trying to make sense of everything I went through.
I too isolated myself and hid what I was going through because I didn’t want people to know about my split realities.
No one would have believed what I was dealing with at home.
I would often meet up with friends, having just left a raging maniac at home, and I would feel like I was separated from my friends reality.
I can see now looking back that whether or not my husband was a good person, he was abusive, and I never deserved that treatment. If only someone would have helped me realise it sooner…
My dad killed himself when I was 6. He was very mentally ill towards the end and my mom hid it. He was abusive towards her at the end, but she loved him and he loved her. As his daughter, knowing what he did, I still love him. It breaks my heart for my mom, but she has also shared the wonderful parts of who he was the majority of their 19 year marriage. I’m sorry you’ve had to endure this, especially at such a young age. ❤️
I amm soo sorry for your lost may he rest in peace 🥺💔.
You’re a very strong young woman, I wish you nothin but the best life has to offer you
Cam is the embodiment of care and love
“despair can never be dissolved by escaping it, but by observing it”
We can only imagine how hard this is for you, but you are truly brave and the whole story is very important❤thank you
Oh dear Cam. I didn't have the heart to tell you at the time, but I knew when you posted the video about Landon's death and struggles with addiction that there was more than you were letting on.
You are absolutely right about how addiction changes people. It can be a literal Jekyll and Hyde transformation when you least expect it.
I had a dear friend (who has now passed as well due to a defective heart) who struggled to escape her abuser, and she struggled with the consequences of PTSD.
I am proud of you for revealing BOTH of your truths, and I hope the girls will have all their love and admiration for you when you are ready to publish your book
It breaks my heart to know this. There’s so much brokenness in the world and good people do really bad things, even to people they love. I’m proud of you for speaking up and always using your platform for good. Love and hugs 🥰
Been here since 2019, it breaks my heart for all the silent struggles you've been through. On the flip side you turned on that camera with a soft smile, pretending to be okay. You are such an amazing person Cam, you will always have me in your corner.
Cam, I cannot wait to read your book. Over the past few months my friends and I have come together to help one of our best friends out of a DV situation. And as of late she finally got herself her own apartment with her kiddo. Your story is so important not only to yourself but to people like me and my friend because it proves we are never alone. Much love to you and the girls❤❤
Drugs/addiction can do such bad things to you, things you’d never see yourself ever doing when sober. So much love and support for you Cam
Let’s not blame the drugs lol
@@taylorm1997no… i am a recovery addict and i can assure you it is the drugs. things i’ve done when i was under the influence is things i can’t even fathom now that im sober so please if you don’t know anything on this topic don’t speak. 🙂
As a DV survivor… I sincerely hope you put that book out. You’re so right, it happens way more than people think and it’s usually the person in your life you least expect it from. It may encourage others to get the help they need (The abuser or the victim!)
i literally just went through a breakup with my abuser 4 days ago. i don’t believe it was a coincidence that this popped up on my timeline today. i really think your story will help my healing process, as my ex was an addict as well. thank you for sharing your story.
Hey I know I’m just a stranger on the internet but I’m really happy that you got out of that situation and I wish you the best future. Sending positive vibes your way :)
@@kayleethomas6063 thank you so much
I'm so proud of you
You are carrying his love and good qualities in the form of 2 little girls. Everyone thinks they’d know what they’d do until it actually happens. No matter how you tell your story your love and compassion for Landon will never be overshadowed❤️ I can’t wait to read your book.
It’s crazy how similar our stories are and it makes me think about how many other stories might be just as similar.. hearing your story unfold through videos has helped me realize a lot of us go through these traumatic experiences and you would never know otherwise
Going back and watching your old videos and now knowing what was really happening is insane. I am so sorry that this happened to you. rip Landon 💙
So did it make you believe her story that she was dealing with DV yet WAITED two YEARS to come out with this story?
I seriously hope that any young man who might chose to start dating her is smart enough to look into her past life otherwise he’s going to get dragged down & made out to be abusive if things don’t go Camryn’s way.
So by going back through her videos just what made you believe her? I’d believe her story IF Landon’s parents spoke out and said he was abusive.
Lastly does anyone remember Cam having party at Landon’s parents home & the house was completely destroyed by party goers? Let’s talk about Cam’s misdeeds I’m pretty sure they were BOTH pretty equal in doing Domestic Violence to EACH OTHER.
Lastly, where’s the police reports about Landon’s DV Cam? I’m sure you called 911 a couple of times right? So there has to be police reports for sure.
@@June-rb1nx I completely believe her you could tell he was off you could tell it the whole time, and she has no reason to lie what would be her reason to lie. You were truly messed up for thinking that she would lie about something like this.
@@June-rb1nx also the reason she waited years is because she could’ve been scared to tell her story like many people are there, hundreds if not, thousands of people out there who have a story to tell, but are too scared because of people like you she was most likely scared for this exact reason getting bashed and hated on also she might’ve been scared to leave him as she tried once and he threatened her and forced her to come back so let’s say she left him again and told her story he could’ve seriously hurt them his kids and her she wasn’t gonna do that she wasn’t gonna put her kids in danger
@@June-rb1nx also, you have no idea what was going on in the house. She might’ve not been able to call the cops and if she did he could’ve easily lied and she would’ve been put right back in that situation where he could of easily hurt her or her kids or himself most likely the reason that she’s telling her story now is because she feels safe to tell it she feels like Landon isn’t gonna hurt her because he can’t, at this point, you should just leave this poor woman alone go find something else to do
@@June-rb1nx once again, it’s hard to leave a situation like that which you clearly wouldn’t understand because you clearly have not been put into a situation like that before so once you deal with something like that, then come to me again and then tell me how you feel about it because right now you’ve never been through something like that before so you have no clue on how she feels
As a DV survivor myself this couldn’t be more true! You are so strong! Just take it one day at a time. Sometimes a moment at a time! Love to you and your precious girls!
what is DV?
@@jassy3612 domestic violence
I cannot wait to read your book. As someone who has been in a domestic abuse relationship, I look forward to reading this. I applaud you for your bravery in putting this part of your story out there, it is not easy, but it will help you in your recovery, and help others who are going through it. Sending love.
Thank you for sharing this. I’m a DV survivor too. My daughters dad also passed away from su1c1de. He was also on drugs when he would abuse me & I’ve since forgiven him for what all he put me through. It took me so long to be able to even grieve. Nobody even knew what I was dealing with. His mom blames me for him passing away because I left the situation before I gave birth to our daughter & didn’t want to get back together with him. When he passed away it was kind of like a weight lifted off my shoulders because I knew he couldn’t hurt me anymore or try to hurt my daughter but I felt so guilty for feeling that way for so long. This really makes me feel less alone. I love you ❤️
When you said “just because someone is showing signs of anger that doesn’t mean they’re gonna hurt you” and I get it and it has been hard for me as well. Those behaviors send me a flash back too. I completely understand; it has been months of therapy for me and still working on it
thank you, thank you for sharing your story. You're so brave for showing on this platform, which can be destructive, a delicate piece of you. I want to tell you that despite the toxic side of RUclips, you are helping so many people by doing what you do. Im 21 years old too and i can't describe how powerful you are with your words to a girl your age that has/ has never lived what you went through, because your teaching so much, believe me. Unfortunately, there will always be people that have something hurtful or not appropriate to say, but trust me, what you doing here is all worth it.
As someone who's been a victim, You hit the nail on the head with everything you have said. I been a silent viewer for years and to hear your story makes me feel better to know, I wasn't alone. Camryn; You are so brave and I commend you for sharing this hard and tragic story.
god, hearing this at 14 could have changed so much for me. thank you for sharing your story, it will save people.
There is no light in her eyes. Since her husbands passing. I hope she finds happiness again. She will. I wish her the best.
She will for sure 💛 she’s lived such a hard life.
I see a brighter light than when she was with him. Im just glad those children are spared from abuse. Above all, thats what matters.
There is wdym
I semi agree.. but when she has videos and pictures looking at her daughters.. there’s so much light in her eyes
@@ShockResistor I don’t know why you would say that like how would this help her if she saw this comment you’re weird
you are so strong cam, genuinely. you have helped so many people just by continuing to share your story. your girls are growing up with an amazing mother.
people are always going to hate and have judgement no matter what you do but you have to keep going and know that there are people who are gonna be there for you and understand your story.
you’re a gorgeous mama and amazing at everything you do.
As a young dv survivor myself, i needed someone to say something. Bc nobody does. I had to figure it out myself and it took so long to even come to terms with it. Thank you for making this video. I try so hard to speak openly in my community, but like you said, it’s pushed under the rug. I’m so glad you’re safe. Thank you so much ❤️
And people are still calling her a liar. It’s so sad. This is why people don’t say anything. I’m so sorry you had to deal with that too.
Thank you for this, as a survivor of emotional and sexual abuse from my past partner of 4 years the question I hate hearing the most is “why didn’t you leave?” finally someone is speaking out on why leaving is the hardest part❤️
I have always been a very passive non confrontational person and NEVER came close to ever laying a hand on anyone....this changed when I became addicted to opioids. Addiction changes you and makes you do these awful horrible things that you would NEVER have normally done. I'm ashamed to say that there were a few times that I got physical with my husband during a fight or when I was angry and hurt about something he did. It is NEVER okay to put your hands on somebody or throw things at them- even if they did something fucked up to hurt your feelings. Retaliating with violence is NEVER the answer. And it certainly didnt help solve our arguments- it ALWAYS made things worse. Doing that stuff to him was completely out of character and went against my core morals. During those times, That was NOT me. He knew it wasn't me. He knew it was the addiction talking and not the woman he married. Thankfully, I am now on a much better track in recovery and he patiently stood by my side the ENTIRE time "out of unconditional love" as he explains it...although I am no longer physically violent because I'm doing so well in recovery, and he tells me every day that he has long since forgiven me, this still doesn't mean that he isn't still traumatized and hurting from what I did when I was an addict. that stuff doesn't go away overnight. Healing from trauma is a very long and complicated process. This is something that kills me...to know that my split second impulsive choice that I made when I was angry and under the influence of drugs would cause long term damage and hurt to my beloved sweetie and best friend . Unlike my merciful and compassionate spouse, I myself am not at a place where I can forgive myself yet...I just never thought I could be abusive to the man I adore and love so dearly.
Im sharing this so people can see from an addicted abuser's perspective because it might help some people whose spouse is suddenly acting differently like I was. I'm also sharing this to help validate cam's story- that domestic violence sadly is something that happens A LOT in couples where one is struggling with addiction yet it never gets talked about. When she talks about this, she isnt bashing Landon's character; she's rather bringing awareness to how cruel the disease of addiction is and how much it can harm loved ones and not just the person battling addiction.
I am NOT a bad or combative person and I absolutely love my husband to death. I just can't stress enough how much addiction changes you personality and makes you do bad things that you can't believe you're actually doing. You lose your identity, core values, and beliefs as you're consumed by substance abuse and addiction. This is why Im not just recovering for me and to give myself a better life.... I'm just as much recovering for my husband so he can have the loving gentle woman back that he first fell in love with. I'm so lucky to have him .
Cam thank you so much for sharing your story. You're so brave. Your trauma and experiences are VALID and there's not a doubt in my mind that you courageously bringing awareness to an issue that is rarely discussed WILL help so many people going through the same thing and are maybe in denial about it or realize it but feel so alone in their struggles. You're giving a voice to people like my husband, who is struggling but doesn't want to talk about it out of fear for "making me look bad". Addicts who got physical with loved ones like myself SHOULD be held accountable, as this helps our victims in their healing process from what I've heard. This can only happen if it's discussed instead of being kept under wraps like it so often is now. The way to spark a change for this is for people like you start a dialogue about the issue. You are a vessel for change and healing JUST by putting your story out there. I will have my husband check out your videos because your story will most likely resonate with him which can help him heal and know he wasn't alone in what he went through.
Youre a resilient and impressive woman. I wish you all the continued healing and inner peace that you're so deserving of.
Thank-you for sharing. I’m so glad you’re doing better, wishing you and your husband all the best ❤️❤️
Thank you for sharing your story too!! Sending love and healing vibes to Cam, you & your husband as well!! This topic definitely needs to be more talked about!!!
thank you for sharing this, it's so touching to read it all and honestly, it makes me glad to see the willingness to overcome this situation in your family, I hope you two find the strength needed together and overcome all traumas abuse has left in you and your husband, you're both victims and deserve to find happiness, health and peace ❤️
You, Anna, are just as much of a resilient and impressive human. This had to take a lot to be able to open up about, but it just goes to show how brave you truly are. It takes a lot to be able to admit your mistakes. Keep shining, mama.
This is a very brave story to share. hearing someones perspective as someone who has gone through addiction is important
Cam I can't even begin to tell you how proud we are of you. The emotions you felt after his death was totally understandable. You were upset because you lost the love of your life but also angry at him and maybe you even felt some what free from the abuse. Whatever you felt was totally valid, nobody ever should be telling you how to feel unless they were in the exact situation you went through. Lots of love ❤️
I’m 10 years older than you, Cam, and you are wise beyond your years, and you are someone I look up to! You’re so strong and I’m very proud of you ❤️ thank you Cam, for sharing this.
I can’t believe he cheated and abused you. Makes me so sad. Just shows people who act perfect on camera are not perfect
She cheated on him!!!!!!
@@misssnowrose9401 are you a Channon Rose Stan?
He cheated? Where does she say that?
@@misssnowrose9401 where did u hear that
Cam posted a tiktok video about it
from my own experience with abuse, loving and hating that person is the most difficult feeling to wrap your head around and the future is so blurry. i just want to say i am so proud of you and the way you're communicating your story . How you have broke through to the other side is really lovely to see :) love youuuuuu
ugh so true the fine line between loving and absolutely hating them. it’s crazy and makes you trick yourself. An aspect no one realizes when they criticize people in abusive situations. It’s not easy. This person was once the light of your life and suddenly they cause you so much pain but you can’t let go. It’s just weird and still makes me crazy to this day.
When you uploaded the video about landons passing, I knew there was something up, something more we didn't know. I felt it in your words and looks... I'm glad you can finally speak your truth and try to heal
It breaks my heart because I was in an abusive relationship the same time you were, & I could see how much you were hurting. I'm so proud of how far you've come. Thank you for sharing your story and I'll always be one of your supporters❤
Your so strong 💜💜
@@Makennaj.180 ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Same here, sending love 🫶🏻
Same here 🫶🏻🤍
@@angelicasmpsn2 ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I’m so nervous to hear, but just listen I’m so proud of you cam! It takes strength and bravery to come forward when you know others have & will JUDGE & be so mean and cruel to you:(
My mom went through the same thing with my step dad who was more then a dad then mine. And you and my mom and all the people who go through this are truly the most strong people i know ❤
Cam you don’t know how much this healed my inner child. This was my dad, he struggled with Xanax and alcohol addiction which turned him verbally abusive towards my step mom sometimes, but as a kid I see him being an incredible father. Fast forward to 2015 he unalived himself and I’ve struggled to much with how I should see him after learning all the things he’s done even though he was an amazing person. You put it so well “ two things can be true at once even though they contradict each other”
Sweet Cam, I cannot imagine how deafening the silence must have felt these past couple of years feeling like you had to keep your truth inside for fear of being made out to be the bad guy just because you’re still hear and he is not. It’s unfathomable. What you went through is valid and just as important. I’m so so proud of the growing and healing you have done. You are truly truly a role model for so many. You are such a light! Keep shining and don’t let anything or anyone get in your way.
I'm probably one of your oldest subscribers (63) . You amaze me. How you've grown as a young mother is inspiring. I can see a bright future in front of you and your girls. love from Southern California
Cam the way you speak is just so comforting. I am also a survivor of DV and I watched you through out my relationship. I am so glad that you have found some kind of peace from the situation you were in. I still am in survival mode and it’s been a year since I’ve left. Every noise i hear that i don’t know where it comes, when my boyfriend raises his voice at his videos games, when people walk up on me too fast or i don’t realize they are there. It can all put me back into my past relationship. I wish you the best vibes while on your journey of healing❤️
Domestic violence is never okay. Violence is never okay. make your voice heard , whether it’s now or later, everyone deserves their voice to be heard, and to be helped.
Speaking from experience. Xanax truely changes your personality. Sober, I am a really sweet caring person that would do anything for most. On them, I was the DEVIL! I would break you down for absolutely no reason. Mad for no reason. I hated the world, everyone and everything in it for no reason. Not to justify what he said or did, just saying it changes a person's morals! Glad you found peace and forgiveness.
This Oct it will be 30 years since my husband did the same as Landon (not saying it outright because of YT). Because of Xanax. I reported the side effects, to his MD, and to the manufacturer. I am still in awe that this is on the market, especially since I have heard MANY people report the same thing.
On the other hand, my hubby was a loving, caring human being, and I truly understand how you feel, Cam. My daughter was only 1 1/2 when he died, but I have always been truthful with her, myself, and others about everything we went through. It helped me heal! You are not alone! HUGS!
Keep in mind Xanax can also be helpful for people!!
My old roommate was a Xanax addiction and was truly the most awful thing to experience. She would steal our cars, become aggressive and violent, and then not remember and deny all of it the next day, even attacking us for accusing her. It was horrible.
My Dad died when I was 10, a few years ago my Mom told me something about my Dad that really messed me up. I think that its good to be open and honest, and this is probably one of those times. However, I don't know why my Mom felt compelled to tell me that my Dad had done this awful thing. He's been gone 25 years. I know that you're kind and compassionate and aren't going to just drop info on your daughters out of nowhere, but being on the receiving end of hearing a terrible truth about my Dad was ....difficult.
Its gonna be extra difficult for them because the info about their dad is everywhere online.
@@ShockResistor That is very true. :(
Ooof goosebumps “he no longer has an ego to be bruised, he is just love”
Been watching for years and am a DV survivor myself. This just truly goes to show you never know what someone is going through.
So many times I thought of speaking about the DV I lived on this platform. Never ever actually went through it. From fear of criticism. I am glad that you have come forward for people living through it now, as well as people who went through it and just haven’t been able to speak about it like me.
Thank you
I had a feeling this would eventually be a topic you bring up. I'm proud of you and you are incredibly strong. Sending love always.
May I ask why you thought she would bring this topic up ?
@@akiracephas5856 he was an addict, and at one point she mentioned there was more to her story. seeing how dv is common in relationships in which one person is an addict, I’m guessing this person just made the assumption
@@Kim-mh5cv partially that yes! But as she was mourning she was definitely becoming a newer almost more free spirited version of herself. She said often its not that Landon was controlling of her but I felt it was something along those lines.
Cam, I am in awe of the way you were able to present this. I dont think it could have been done better. The way you managed to talk about this topic AND keep Landon in the good light is admirable. I cant imagine the amount of maturity, courage and kindness that this takes.
You’re such a sweet kind hearted soul despite all you’ve been through, I’ve been watching you since just after you had Collette and to see you go through all this online is so heartbreaking, I truly couldn’t comprehend what you went through especially being so young but the fact you don’t want to ruin his image is a huge testimony to the person you are and how well you’ve dealt with the grief. I’m truly so sorry for all you’ve been through and I’ll pray that the universe looks after you and the kids going forward 🥺
Biting my cheek, snot running, and tears flowing.. Cam I truly wish I could hug you right now. Literally I've been blind, I truly only seen one side. I seen the picture perfect family oriented channel. This whole time. Like you said. He cared for you, and he loved you and he was such an amazing person but you've been through some sh!t and that's a fact and that's real... I value you so much, I appreciate how you continue to advocate for the most perfect things. This isn't talked about enough and it truly should be. When you said "I'm surviving now" chills became up on me and I couldn't stop crying. I hope this journey is a smooth one for you. We know writing this book won't be easy. But you're so much more powerful than you think babe. You're so strong and you're so fkn wise. I fully believe certain challenges are only made for certain people. You have the platform, you have the will. The girls will also remember this time and ask themselves "How did my mom do this" You've proven to people and yourself each day that there is a light after a horrible storm. Keep shinning, and keep inspiring. ✨
I love you !!!! (✿^‿^)
i’m a domestic abusive survivor myself. i was stuck for 2 years. the last time i left i never looked back & i’ve never been more proud of myself for leaving.
I've been watching this channel for SO LONG. I can't believe how much Cam has changed and I can see her becoming herself and it's wild.
We are all so proud of you Cam! It is so brave to come out with all of this🥰 you should not worry about people criticizing, people will always talk. Do what you think it's better😊 you are a smart woman. In my opinion, knowing the whole story would allow a better understanding to all the warning that some victims might ignore at the beginning of the relationship. As it is easier for someone who is out of that relationship to realize when were the first red flags as someone who is in that situation might not see them as that. You reflecting on the first warnings might help a lot of people who are currently going through it. Because the first step is recognizing the abuse to then know how to deal with it. Love you Cam
I admire Camryn so so so much ❤ - her good heart, this must have been so hard for her 🥺
I first found your channel two years ago, shortly after escaping a relationship with a man who was abusive and using drugs. I have two boys myself, and I have carried a lot of guilt. I’ve thought about writing a book myself, or podcasting, anything to get my story out there. I am glad to see you using your platform for DV awareness. I just want to say that I see you, I’ve seen you since I watched my first vlog of you, (which was you sharing your experience about loosing your husband) you’re heard. When you said as a survivor, you see so many warning signs everywhere that no one talks about, I felt that. It’s so true. I believe it’s the reason why I felt connected to that very first vlog I watched. Sending you love and good vibes.
Cam I relate to everything you were saying! I e gone through DV and I'm a survivor as well. I'm so proud of you for speaking up and sharing your story with us!! Sending you positive and healing vibes!
2 things can exist at once and I have been in that same place. No one is all good or all bad and relationships are so complex. I also believe as you do about the afterlife. You aren't damaging Landon's memory. He was a human being, with personal challenges. It doesn't take away the good things.
well said
Camryn, you’re so unbelievably strong and inspiring. Your growth just becomes more and more evident in every video & it’s so heartwarming to see. my first relationship was a very toxic DV situation for nearly 5 years (14-19) and although our situations are a little different, they’re also really similar, & everything you said makes me feel so not alone & understood. Regardless of whether you go through with publishing your book or not, thank you so much for bringing more awareness to this situation. You’ve already helped many, just by sharing this with us.
your book will help so many people, and you should be so proud of yourself for sharing your story and making sure everyone remembers Landon for the amazing person he was. You’re truly incredible, there’s honestly no enough words to explain how brave and strong you’ve been since Landon passed away, and what you went through silently.
The internet can be such a toxic place, strangers voicing their opinions and I can understand why you don’t and won’t want to share too much. But please know all of your subscribers, followers love you and support you❤️🥹
Oh honey...thank you. Being a DV survivor myself, I can't tell you how brave you are for sharing your story. I am still working through my trauma and the triggers. Everything you said was exactly how we feel. While I didn't have kids with my ex, I still felt stuck and hopeless. I could go on and on, but you truly understand. Keep telling your story. We all have your back. 😘😘
Sorry if you get offended, that’s not the purpose of this comment but…what Landon parents think about it? Did you tell them about it? Because I feel like it’s getting to the point when Landon is gone and more dark stories are coming out when in fact he cannot defend himself anymore. I know that you need to heal, especially when you were/are a teen mom with that many problems at home and now you have been through a lot and you’re really strong in all of this + your story will help many young DV survivors but I’m thinking about his parents too…their son was a teen dad, struggling with his mental health, had to start his adult life quicker than other people, passed away…and now they’ll find out that their son was abusing his family. It’s like finding that he passed away once again, slap straight into their faces…idk
This whole videos was tasteless and sort of attention seeking tbh… but that’s what RUclipsrs do. I remember feeling so heartbroken for Cam when the announcement came out… but then the bisexuality videos came out and now this abuse and it’s ironic that it’s all coming out after he’s dead. Domestic violence I can see why anyone would wait until after his death (but why flaunt it online? Then proceeds to say she doesn’t want to harm her kids while putting all their problems for the Internet) also she said that he was OK with her experimenting with her bisexuality… So why did that video have to come after he died? It seems like these people just keep trying to stay relevant
@@Lolee56 This! I had to scroll to the bottom to find this comment, which sums up exactly how I felt about this video.
Thank you for having the bravery to speak out on this. Those of us that have been in similar situations really feel heard and not alone. Thank you.
I can totally see this as a two part book. Making one of you before Landon and getting with them and how your life was together. Then one when after he left and how you felt and grew from it etc
Why are people hating on this video? It's not wrong to talk about how you have been a victim of DV, even if your abuser is dead.
Literally 😢
I think you said it perfectly... humans are often contradictory and complicated and can be many things at once even if it doesnt make much sense. I think what you went through was hard enough already and knowing this I cannot imagine all of the mixed feelings/emotions/thoughts you have had to deal with. I admire your honesty, strength, and bravery to share! Sending love and will be reading your book the moment it comes out!
Today I was laying in my bed and I suddenly remembered your channel, I missed it so Much bc I remember when your husband died I just took a break from watching them stuff went on in my life and today but I found your channel again and I’m so glad.
Cam, you are so strong. You're so awesome. I can't imagine what you've been through. I sure it was hard to forgive him, but I'm glad you did, for you. You're not alone. We're in your corner always.
I'm so happy for you Cam. I did feel like something was missing in the story during your grief...my sister was a victim of DV for a long time so I was concerned about you but I didn't want to jump to conclusions. Take care and continue being happy
As someone who knows what you mean from experience, thank you. There will be people who don't understand. But this isn't for those people. This is for the people who have been through it. Sending all my love, Camryn.
Cam, I have so much respect for you. Watching how you’ve grown over the last couple years is inspiring to say the least. Thank you for your candidness, your care, your vulnerability, for sharing your story. You are doing more good that you know.
Growing up means realizing there are no heroes and there are no villains. We are all just people. Making choices.
Sending so much love to you and your family, Cam. ❤️
I am so sorry for the struggles you’ve had to endure Cam. You are one of the strongest people I’ve ever seen. You get your point across so eloquently and are so mature in your line of thinking. I really admire you. I cannot wait to read your book and hear more of your truth. So much love to you. ❤️
you’re so brave and strong for sharing this. i’m wondering , and i don’t mean anything bad by this, just genuinely curious because of how tough this situation is, have you spoken to Landon’s family about this when it happened , and or before you decided you wanted to speak out and share your story? do you still have a good connection with them, im trying to see how it is for the parents perspective. how do they feel about you sharing these things?
I could have never imagined The other side of Landon, but I know that drugs and depression make people really be someone who isn’t them, I will forever see the Happy, amazing dad, amazing husband and amazing person he was and all of the people who truly love and care about Landon will see that great and happy side as well. Landon cared and loved his family to the fullest and even when the drugs and the depression took over he still loved his family with his whole heart. You are so brave to share this story, and I’m sure you will help other people as well by sharing this story. Thank you so much for sharing this knowing it must have been so hard, but please remember he is looking over right now and he is thinking a pout how proud he is of you right now, and how strong you are by raising those 2 little amazing girls.
You inspire me, I went through the same thing and it took my children from me but hearing your story made me realize that I have a calling to help people too, thank you my friend
Cam I am so glad that you are sharing your story in such a your own way. I am so happy that you feel comfortable sharing your story. Your Internet Fam will support you, no matter what and I’m so glad that you have chosen to not hide yourself and in general just be yourself. DO NOT let anyone invalidate your situation and your feelings because they are very much valid. I know that it has been a long journey and it may not always be so good but you and your family are getting through it and that is so inspiring and shows hope to those who are going through or went through something similar.
Landon was human, we all make mistakes especially when we’re young and hurting. People are not just one thing, they are multitudes. It’s important to remember the good times but also acknowledge and validate the bad. You’ve been protecting him and your truth for so long, it’s okay to be as honest as you want.
Our situations were very different but I was also in an abusive/toxic relationship from the age of 14 until I was 23. It’s so hard to come to terms with what you couldn’t see back then. There’s no wrong way to tell your truth, just the best way for you.
Not you trying to defend dv..
@@user-tx5jb huh😔
@@user-tx5jb not you trying to come for another dv survivor. Rewatch the video, do some research and try again. She’s allowed to grieve & memorialize her husband the way she & her daughters want; we should all respect that.
He had a mental illness, if he had addressed that he would have been different. But them being young they didn’t understand the full extent of the damage.
Well said. 👏🏽
Your reflections are mature beyond your years! I’m not minimizing the pain you’ve been through but it seems that it really put you in a journey of growth and healing.
I coauthored a book last year. It is a book about childhood trauma and has about 7 different stories from different authors telling our story of trauma and how we have overcame it. We told our stories to hopefully help others who have gone through similar things. Writing is healing for any trauma, no matter the age that it occured. I applaud you Cam, do this for yourself and for D and Coco as well. 💗
It makes so much sense why he apologized before he took his “bath”. Everything makes sense!
...
@@floriet5195 in " telling my husbands story "
@@_Rainbowshadows_ yes, but i’m pretty sure the “…” is because it’s gross to act like allison is rn, “it all makes sense!!” this isn’t a mystery. This is someone’s life, someone’s loved one, and someone’s father. Gross behavior.
Haven't you done enough
@@magnolia6968 it’s okay to say that. it’s a story of people published online, and you can evaluate it as a story you hear. it also makes so much more sense to me. in the video about Landon passing away, it seemed some things were odd to me, her reaction was mixed and complex, but not quite what i would imagine i would have… we are all different so i haven’t given it much thought. but now it feels like I have a complete (or just much better) picture and can actually understand it better - also, the reasons someone would feel such a burden that taking their life would seem reasonable to them, for example.
so yes, it makes so much more sense now.
For someone who's been through domestic violence for years you sharing your story helped me feel like I wasn't alone. I'm so happy you came out about this, it shows that you're healing so much. I've healed so much since my abuse. I loved my abuser, I had felt close to them but then I was slowly getting angry and them for what they were putting me through. But it helped me so much to understand that sharing about it helped others
I see him as a loving caring kind person he is in a better place now and I will always see and remember him as a loving caring kind person #blueforlandon 💙💙💙🥰😢💔🕊 may his sweet caring soul Rest In Peace
I've got goosebumps! You're one of the most inspiring people out there! Much love from Austria! I've been following you for I think 4+ years.
Cam, I'm so proud of u for sharing ur story. That is not an easy thing to do. Im only a 15 year old girl who loves to watch ur videos and follow along on ur journey but you've been such a big inspiration in my life and I know you will continue to be. Thank you for making content for us, sharing ur adorable girls with us, and being huge inspiration. I love you so much! #Camily❤
I appreciate the ending when you pointed out how you view on abusers as two sides, you deserve to be able to speak on your side of what happened, you are the only one who knows and it is a hard topic to speak. I hope you find healing while writing your book and i hope others can find healing while reading your book as well. 💕
“It’s not as easy as just leaving.” It’s not. This is a situation that you truly can’t judge or understand unless you’ve been there yourself. It’s so difficult and complex. So please don’t judge. You can extend help to someone, want them best for someone, but you can never judge for someone for how they handle abuse because it is such an incredibly complex situation.
Your doing the best you can and you're a wonderful Mom.. Please don't let the haters get to you girl!! Your a woman with real emotions not just someone on youtube that the worls knows, Keep up the good work hun!