Facing Rejection, Letting Go of Their Past, & Do 'Butterflies' Really Matter? | Christian Dating Q&A

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 3 дек 2024

Комментарии • 59

  • @FairlightChristianna1Cor318
    @FairlightChristianna1Cor318 Год назад +17

    Such great advice! I didn't have butterflies with my husband except when he shows up and totally surprises me. It's always been that way even when we were dating. "butterflies" are just your nervous system getting stimulated when it's not sure what to expect. If you feel safe with someone, and they're predictable, and you know what to expect from them you won't get butterflies. But you can still deeply appreciate who they are and be attracted to them physically. And yes, attraction definitely grows with emotional connection and emotional intimacy. Also, sometimes we have to dig deep to know God's peace, because depending on the patterns in your life, unhealthy turmoil and drama can feel familiar and "peaceful" and like the easy option, rather than stepping into relationship with someone unusual compared to what you're used to, it can feel unpeaceful, because it's calm, boring, certain. Sounds backwards in some ways, but as someone who had trauma in my past, my husband felt very safe and boring. Now he's the best thing ever, and I'm so glad I pushed past my discomfort into God's deep peace.

    • @scrubsandjesus
      @scrubsandjesus Год назад +4

      I will never be able to explain how thankful I am for your comment 🙏 newlywed & needed this. Thank you!

  • @mariamangion21
    @mariamangion21 Год назад +41

    “A warm hug”, that’s a great way to describe your channel! I just love coming here! You’re the only RUclipsrs/content creators who has and always been authentic 🦋 Love how vulnerable you are and never fail to remind us that we are all human 🥹

    • @ToriAndChad
      @ToriAndChad  Год назад +4

      love that so much - thank you!!!

    • @kni2404
      @kni2404 Год назад

      100% agreed 🥹

  • @paulinajohnson5439
    @paulinajohnson5439 Год назад +12

    My husband liked me for 5 years before I even gave him a chance. He was discipled by someone, regular attended church, was part of a small group, kind, had similar dreams and came from a great family.
    I was not interested in him past friendship that whole time. However, I heard the Lord say to be open to him. So I was and we ended up married. Now with 2 babies. I love that our relationship stemmed from faith over feelings from the get go. The feelings obviously followed even more now in our 4 year of marriage than ever before.
    I find that it really only comes down to what the Lord is saying. Seek first the kingdom and everything else will be added including feelings.

    • @rc.98
      @rc.98 Год назад +1

      Wow love this ❤❤

  • @karen_hockaday
    @karen_hockaday Год назад +4

    Wow y'all. I just had a revelation. God is teaching me what my marriage relationship will look like...like my relationship with Him. WOW😮

  • @Jesuslovesyoualways22
    @Jesuslovesyoualways22 Год назад +3

    Ok big bro Chad coming in cluch with the truth at 12:50 needed to here this tha ks guys for these videos so helpful!

  • @Isabelizzo1028
    @Isabelizzo1028 Год назад +10

    Letting go of your spouses past in marriage can definitely be hard at times! This verse really helps: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭4‬:‭32‬ ‭🩷

  • @annabrown12
    @annabrown12 Год назад +5

    Having Jesus’ peace is so so key. Love it ❤

  • @savsgotyou
    @savsgotyou Год назад +3

    Y’all always post these in the most TIMELY manner. Thank you😭

  • @evelynmo9824
    @evelynmo9824 Год назад +4

    So glad I listened to this today. Rich in godly counsel. Thanks, guys

  • @kgothatsomosweu7358
    @kgothatsomosweu7358 Год назад +2

    I am grateful for you guys. May the Lord bless your family and ministry. Love from South Africa

  • @leah_grace
    @leah_grace Год назад +1

    Love this guys!!! I’ve missed watching the channel ❤ Such great advice all the way through. Everyone can take something away from this… 🎉

  • @destinyroman504
    @destinyroman504 Год назад +2

    These were actually good questions !

  • @rachelroberts3918
    @rachelroberts3918 Год назад

    I cannot tell you how much your channel has helped me… I love watching you all ❤

  • @carolwilliamsblog
    @carolwilliamsblog Год назад +2

    So fun chatting with y'all with the premiere video this time!

    • @ToriAndChad
      @ToriAndChad  Год назад +1

      thanks for joining in! It was a blast!!

  • @Sarah-sr8zw
    @Sarah-sr8zw Год назад +1

    loveee this and love the series name!

  • @lindabueckert9559
    @lindabueckert9559 Год назад +3

    Thank you for your explanations.. it seems many adults think once the butterflies fade the marriage is over..

  • @Ashley16marie
    @Ashley16marie Год назад

    Love the thumbnail title, love the advice, love the whole dang thing!

  • @vfjohnston
    @vfjohnston Год назад

    12:12 is the sweetest 🥹🥹

  • @allisonlucas018
    @allisonlucas018 Год назад +1

    So encouraging as always!!!

  • @destinyross7729
    @destinyross7729 Год назад +2

    Always look forward to your guys’ videos ❤
    Is there a secret message being revealed at the end of the video. I noticed in the last video with Chelsea there was a “T” at the end of the video. At the end of this video there’s a “TA”. Maybe I’m missing something but I’m really hoping its a secret message soon to be revealed 😅

    • @e.b.4591
      @e.b.4591 Год назад +1

      There definitely is!! I was thinking the same thing and it sure refers to the "secret" they're keeping from us - can't wait for the reveal! Is it gonna be on August 15??

  • @AS-cl4nl
    @AS-cl4nl Год назад +11

    . Thank you so much! I would love a link to the video💓I just want to say as a 15 year old Christian that found Christ just 7 months ago, thank you guys for encouraging me, to love myself. My little testimony-> Hi I’m Diamond and I just wanted to share my little testimony. So yea I’m diamond and I’m 15 years old, but leading to who I am today has taken a lot of trials. One big thing is that I am the youngest in the family so I never grew up with cousins which had an effect since I was little on my loneliness. In school I had a hard time with people and the girls at the school. So I had no friends. I remember at recess I would just sit on the wall and wait to go in. Or my grandma or mom used to pick me up as much as Possible during lunch so I didn’t have to go to lunch. My 6th grade I was never at school and dreaded going everyday. My school experience Weighed on my mental health so much. That’s when I started has no confidence and disliking who I was. Then 2 years ago I started developing my eating disorder. I always disliked how j looked compared to other girls but this time I decided I was going to make a change. It started off slowly and I allowed myself to still have my favorite foods like chips. Then when I wasn’t seeing I change I started cutting more. Everyday 2 years ago when I would get to my grandmas house I would weight myself and then eat breakfast and weight myself. I would see how much more food I would allow myself throughout the day before it would change the number on the scale. I was lightheaded every time I got up. Then I stopped with the scale. Recently for a year now I have an app that tracks my food and have been the most restrictive I now eat the same things everyday and only allow myself to have something “unhealthily” twice a month. I haven’t had chips in 2 years, pizza, spaghetti etc. I have a hard time sleeping at night, and how no energy everyday. I haven’t had a cycle in a year and have been told by the doctors I stopped my growth. I still struggle everyday and try to challenge myself. I’m the middle of all this I found Christ. On January 2nd 2023 I gave my life to Christ ever since then I have been saved and been living the best I have. I cannot lie to you and say I don’t still have anorexia but Christ never said when you come to him all your problems would go away. He has gotten me through my hard times and has challenged me. One night and I was very hungry and was panicking over eating two crackers and I just heard trust in me and after 20 mins I ate the two crackers and I was fine after. I used to cry when I ate something but now I don’t. My confidence in myself and being content with not having people has been fulfilled from Christ. I now have been in therapy and how identified the reasons behind what I have gone through. Christ has saved me in so many ways. Reading his word everyday has truly changed my life. I am now learning we’re to put my worries and fears. I just want to incourage you that whatever you are going through Christ will meet you were you are at. You will not stay at we’re he meets you because when you put your trust in him you will be renewed by him. It doesn’t mean overnight but I can testify that slowly things will change.

    • @ToriAndChad
      @ToriAndChad  Год назад +2

      AMEN --- here is the link to the video on body image & eating disorders we filmed a few years backruclips.net/video/ryDXV0e8isU/видео.html

    • @AS-cl4nl
      @AS-cl4nl Год назад

      @@ToriAndChadthank you so much

    • @SJD36
      @SJD36 Год назад

      Yay! Praise God for what he is doing! That's awesome❤
      I encourage you to use the authority you have in Christ and rebuke the root of that anorexia. Just say in faith, I rebuke the root of this anorexia in Jesus name. Tell it to leave and refuse to give in to any of the lies of the enemy that the Word of God exposes to you. Find scripture to speak to the lies. I will keep you in prayer❤

    • @AS-cl4nl
      @AS-cl4nl Год назад +1

      @@SJD36 thank you so much 💓 God bless you!

    • @SJD36
      @SJD36 Год назад

      @@AS-cl4nl 🙂❤

  • @moodsofkiwi9285
    @moodsofkiwi9285 Год назад

    I couldn’t find the link to submit a future question but here’s mine: how to encourage or support your husband taking the spiritual leadership role?

  • @natashapinerostachita9755
    @natashapinerostachita9755 Год назад +2

    That was AWESOME

  • @patriciagithae
    @patriciagithae Год назад +2

    Couldn't find the anonymous link. I have a burning question from my friend😅

  • @lindabueckert9559
    @lindabueckert9559 Год назад +4

    A Godly man who will want to raise your children for God and lead his family is so important..

  • @JMKrech
    @JMKrech Год назад

    Love y’all’s advice!!

  • @unapologeticallyromel7096
    @unapologeticallyromel7096 Год назад

    I enjoyed this video this morning 😊

  • @KayleeWaldrip
    @KayleeWaldrip Год назад

    Free people, free people. And let me just say, you two are walking in freedom! Praise the Lord. Thank you so much for this!

  • @KirsteinTherese
    @KirsteinTherese Год назад

    Oh my word, I missed the old outro 💕💕

  • @annlavine3576
    @annlavine3576 Год назад +1

    i do not see the link I have a concern regarding a friend

  • @funmilayoakintola248
    @funmilayoakintola248 Год назад

    Thank you 🥺

  • @pada5992
    @pada5992 Год назад

    Actually if a male friend used to find you attractive but then time goes by and you both have had time to get to know each other. Then on his part of the equation he should be feeling it too -whether God wants you to be his wife or whether that was maybe just the initial attraction that got his younger more naive version to spend time with you and learn to appreciate you as a platonic friend.
    If it's the real thing, how should one person feel like God wants you to be married and the other person feels differently?

    • @pada5992
      @pada5992 Год назад +1

      Does he position himself as a "partner" and does she feel how how life is more easy flowing and prosperous because he gives her support and stability and is he really interested in her life going well, whether it is to his own advantage or not?
      Or is he just acting in a friendly way but not in a way like she can be in her feminine because he takes on the masculine role when he is around her? That is something that may make her feel like this would feel good as a love relationship longterm.
      Does he really want her, or does he just wish she was the one for him because he has not met another woman who ticks his boxes?
      Something about it is probably still not matching.

  • @raghavgupta9920
    @raghavgupta9920 Год назад

    How did chad forgive tori for rejecting hime over the years ?
    We need a time line . Your story is very similar to mine

  • @karen_hockaday
    @karen_hockaday Год назад

    "I gotta go grab a battery" lol this is our commercial break, we will return to our regularly scheduled program 😊

  • @ISing4Jesus6353
    @ISing4Jesus6353 Год назад

    I feel like "butterflies" are more experienced by men. Women's attraction to men grows over time.

  • @kaylacrosby22
    @kaylacrosby22 Год назад

    Thank you Tori & Chad for the content, and making an effort to make the Lord the center of it all. 😁🤗
    I have a dating question: Do you guys think it’s possible to feel peace in a romantic relationship or about a romantic interest, and it not be the peace of God? #askingforafriendcalledme 😄
    BTW: I would have submitted this question anonymously, but I didn’t see the link to do so.

    • @FairlightChristianna1Cor318
      @FairlightChristianna1Cor318 Год назад +1

      I'd say yes. You'd need to take the time and space to make sure you're in tune with the Lord, and seeking Him and being fully willing to end the relationship right then right there. Not just feeling what you want to feel.

    • @kaylacrosby22
      @kaylacrosby22 Год назад +1

      Aww! Thank you for taking the time to respond to my question, Christianna! Your insight is really helpful! I will take note of every word. 😁🙏🏽 Blessings! ❤️

  • @pada5992
    @pada5992 Год назад

    You can unfollow and block and ex OR you can normalize them as human beings who have done nothing soooo wrong that they deserve being shunned and ghosted. Depending on who they are, you could just overcome that past and start with a clean slate and see them and help them see you for the kind humans everybody involved is.

  • @JMKrech
    @JMKrech Год назад

    👏🏼🙏🏼

  • @raghavgupta9920
    @raghavgupta9920 Год назад

    Pls view my problem in ur community post