What Made you Straight Up "NOPE" Out of a Relationship? - Reddit Podcast
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- Опубликовано: 23 май 2023
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Dated a coworker once. I was working at McDonald's at the time. Did a movie night at her place. A day after said first date, i was talking to a group of girls at work. Coworker blew up at me for being friendly. Mind you, we went on one date. Me being the young/naive kid I was, I noted it and ignored it (was about 20 at the time). We had a second date...she was getting too overly-attached and made another angry comment about me having a conversation with girls at work. Politely as possible told her this couldn't work out. If she was like this while i was talking with friends, what would happen well into the relationship? Moved way too fast and made work awkward for 6 months. Never dated a coworker again after this and this was 12 years ago
He told me he enjoyed pranking new people in his office by pretending to be suicidal and pulling the pin on a dud grenade.
One sentence, "can i smell your feet" i was out in an instant
I just say no to any relationships; cause it’s beautiful living alone.
It’s so quiet
No arguments, no gaslighting, no fights, no constant compromise with no reciprocity - there are many worse things than being alone.
lol My relationship experience is sadly minimal but I do have a last straw story: When she conveniently couldn't come to my graduation that meant a lot to me even when I tried to cover the cost (long distance), but called me a couple days later just to ask for money to go to a convention.
My Dad's story is better: his sister set him up on a blind date with one of her friends and he went to pick her up to take her to the movies. In the 20 minutes between picking her up and getting to the theater, she'd already planned when they'd get married, what the wedding would be like, where they'd live and what their house would look like, and how many kids they'd have. He was polite through the whole date, dropped her off, and ran away. He did the 70's equivalent of blocking her on everything.
Why did this post have only one like? This is classic and I feel OP's pain!
I said no to dating a boy, when his twin brother confessed to me for him. It was incredibly awkward.
Went on a date with a girl who said "I just wanna have fun, I do not want a relationship".
I said fine, I agree.
After our first date she sends me a message asking "do you love me?"
I said "no" and she went "Wrong answer"
So I didn't see her anymore...
People who send mixed signals are the worst. Then again, I can't interpret subtle social cues to save myself, being on the spectrum.
Idiot, girl's like to be lied to.
sounds like a dating sim romantic interest
I had one date with a guy, blind date. I was upfront with him and the mutual friend that set us up that i was just looking for fun, not a serious relationship. He tells me about how lonely he is since he sleeps alone, tries to kiss me, calls me later the same night after the date. Kept insisting he wasn’t looking for serious either. 🙄
Content warning: Adult content/abuse -
I have an embarrassing number of stories. Left a girlfriend who, in the heat of passion, asked me to live in her basement rent free - as a chained up sex slave - and was 100% serious (with the price of rent in Cali though… idk it doesn’t sound as bad nowadays😂).
I was on a sexy discord call with a boyfriend once that was interrupted when I got some depressing news in a text so I wasn’t in the mood anymore. At first he sounded understanding, but he started looking for something and got increasingly agitated when he couldn’t find it. I asked what it was and he said he kept a needle nearby to prick himself because he couldn’t “calm down” from his arousal unless he finished or bled. He said he couldn’t finish by himself either. Then he said he had a knife as back up. I hung up the call and blocked him. I later realized that was probably a lie, but either way - instant deal breaker.
I'm not sure which story is more disturbing...
Not making light of your experience but the sentence " ... couldn't 'calm down' from his arousal unless he finished or bled. " is so crazy that it will live rent free in my head now.
I kind of feel for the girl who was seeing demons in the corner of her room because I deal with the same thing except I can actually recognize that they aren't really truly there. I'm slowly but surely working on my issues and I'm getting help. It is pretty terrifying though and I feel especially sorry for her since she can't realize they're not actually there. Could be schizophrenia, which would also explain why she refuses help as often times schizophrenic people have a difficult time believing anything is wrong with them.
Edit: The guy was ultimately doing himself and her a favor because he recognized he didn't have the means to help her. It's not really a bullet dodged situation but just a really sad situation in general.
this is textbook compassion
Not mine, but my husband's story (shared with his permission). He has ASD, and this was said by his then-girlfriend on the way to meet her parents:
"Don't tell my dad you have Aspergers. I don't want him to think you're weak."
Added bonus: her name was Karen
She kidding? We've lived our entire lives with this, they couldn't last a week, if a day. An hour? We're not THAT weak. I think I'm weaker than most XD
I dated a guy who has that, real sweet and wonderful when I initially got to know him, but his personality changed once he went to college and it became a long distance relationship, and it just didn't work out.
I also have a brother who has something similar but it was worse for him than most people, so I've never been one to judge people based on the challenges they face, but rather on how they go about facing those challenges. My brother, while he can't live like everyone else and do as much as everyone else, he is most assuredly quite independent and he can do all sorts of stuff that most people nowadays would struggle doing all on their own. He's crude, rude, and weird but he's tough enough to hold his ground when it counts and he can hold his own, all without anyone holding his hand for anything. He found what he COULD do rather than crying about all the things he couldn't do.
So, my thoughts on people who call others weak just because they aren't perfect or exactly like everyone else, is that those people obviously never learned that that is what it means to be human. Our true abilities are revealed through our imperfections, what makes us unique, and what challenges us to grow into something stronger. Those hypocrites just can't accept that not everyone can be just like them, meanwhile ignoring their own weaknesses, all so they can feel like they're existence is more valuable than someone else's.
I’m glad my girlfriend has none of these issues. She’s very thoughtful, thankful, and patient. She’s an excellent woman and I plan on telling her parents in a couple of years that I’d like to have her hand and marry her. We’re High School sweetheart’s fresh out of school!
Please do NOT tell her parents that you would like to have her hand in marriage. Just tell her parents that you are marrying her. If my daughters' bf comes to me and asks me for her hand in marriage I would say no because my daughter is not some animal for me to buy and sell or decide who she gets married to. A person who would ask for her hand in marriage is not a real man and not worthy of her.
@@petermartin9494 I didn’t mean it such as that sort of way. Thank you for the concern. Have a good day.
Thanks for the positive vibes, it's easy to drown in this kind of thread. 😂
When she took my keys out of my pocket on the basis that I would leave her out in the boonies despite giving no such indications that I would. She downplayed my feelings about this. The car for those curious is a GT86 and is my baby and she knew this.
Creepy af
Woke up to someone pleasuring themselves with my foot. Nope.
Got up, got dressed, headed to the door. Was asked at the door for a kiss. Nope.
Nonononono nooope.
This guy messaged me on Facebook about how he liked me and wanted to be in a relationship with me. So I suggested we go on a date at a coffee shop.
The first subject he bought up was how he had autism (which was fair because I'm on the spectrum too), but he kept talking about how he was getting therapy for his depression and anxiety (which again was wise so at least I knew what I was getting into). I don't know, maybe it was such an intense topic for a first date.
Then, for the rest of the date, I felt that I had to make so much effort keeping the conversation up, as he kept giving one worded answers or grunts whenever I asked what he thought. In the end, I had to make up an excuse to get out of the date as it was that awkward.
You get wow that's a lot from a first date, maybe it's a one off?
And if there's no effort to keep the conversation engaging it just get awkward and boring.
I know it's okay to sit in silence and enjoy their company but yes no answers ( I've found out) looks like you're trying to end the conversation even though you may like them
Broke off an engagement after spending the weekend with the awful family of my fiancé. They were rude and hateful to me and to one other guest, my fiancé took their side and honestly didn’t get as to why I was so upset. He did call me later and tried to apologize, admitted he behaved like a complete idiot, even begged me to take him back, but I told him it was over. I moved out and left behind the ring.
I didn’t see the red flags (bad relationships and mild autism that wasn’t diagnosed at the time I believe may be the cause) but my friends did. She was my first female relationship after coming out, she told me that she understood me wanting to wait a while before sleeping together (I’ve always had that view, even when I was younger) but she tried controlling what I wore and ate, despite knowing I was uncomfortable about my weight at the time due to being underweight for my height; after she dumped me she revealed it was because I wouldn’t sleep with her and tried accusing me of sleeping with my best friend’s fiancé (they were dating at the time and she knew it to be untrue, her fiancé is male for reference) and started calling me a slut to anyone who would listen
I was in one of those whirlwind fast relationships where we became bf/gf after 2 weeks of hanging out (young love, you might say). A couple months after we started dating, he would ask me if I remembered when we did something or when I said something, and I grew very confused because I couldn't recall any of it. Because I was so young, it never occurred to me that he was cheating on me until one of my friends told me to look in his phone, so I did when he was asleep and saw that he was also dating 7 other girls. When I called him out on it and ended the relationship, a few weeks later he sent me a text basically saying "if you didnt look at my phone we could still be together" lol i think it was supposed to be around like the 6th month anniversary. i cant fully remember but it was just so odd and my friends and i would joke about it all the time
Digitally dated a guy I knew for 8 years and when we got together physically it was fine, until three months later when his mental stability became an issue for our relationship, and the friendships we had with other people. Hated to leave him in such a poor mental state, but I was not gonna go down with his ship.
she had heavy buildup of plaque along her gumlines, which started out white and over a period of time started turning green/brown. I tried to tactfully ask what was up with it and she said it's gingevitis and no she wasn't going to the dentist ever again to get it removed because the last dentist hurt her. Turned my stomach looking at it as she talk....I just couldn't..
😂 This is unconventionally hilarious.
Wow that wife in the second (third?) story really needed to have a qualified pharmacist go over her meds to make sure they weren't having adverse interactions, because doctors will prescribe crap without checking the other medications they're on, and you'd be surprised how often people get adverse interactions between their meds. Doctors prescribing like this happens more often than you'd think without anyone double checking the medications, and the pharm techs will just fill the scripts also without checking. She needs an actual degreed pharmacist auditing her medications. They may not be doctors but they know medicines and what they're used for and can even suggest/prescribe things for really common ailments (like dandruff.)
Back in college, there was this girl in my class. We'll call her Delta. The first day of class, Delta is trying to make friends, as you do. At one point, tells a guy, we'll call him Charlie, that she really likes his phone and starts messing around with it. Charlie goes to the toilet real quick. Later, Delta has to excuse herself to the restroom. Charlie then shows us that Delta had sent herself an invitation on Twitter or whatever social network it was (can't remember) from Charlie's account. That's the moment we all knew "Right, so she's THAT kind of girl". After a few months, she started making advances towards me. I'd like to think I dealt with the whole thing quite well: was never disrespectful, but wouldn't show any romantic interest in her, either. She clings to my arm while walking on the street? Sure, but I'm not acting flustered about it or anything. I had to pull the brakes, however, when Delta found out we were having a Christmas party at my dorm and wanted to go with me. I don't know how she found out about that, since she didn't know anyone from my dorm except me and I never mentioned the party to anyone (I didn't plan to go cause I'm a f***ing nerd). I told her I wasn't going to the party, that I was going back home to spend the holidays with my family, which wasn't 100 % true: I didn't go to the party, but I didn't go back home for another couple of days either. Poor girl had problems, but I knew I couldn't help her with them, not without compromising my own mental health in the process.
Dated a guy for a couple of months, made some discoveries (about us both), and realized I was in the relationship for the wrong reasons. I broke it off, and never saw him again.
First date, just a casual meetup for a coffee. Told me she has a newborn baby at home, had been date raped, really disappointed her father, her C-section was seeping blood/fluid still, was chewing gum which caused a build-up of white slime at the corners of her mouth.... nope
I've had a couple girls leave notes on my door when I never told them where I lived after a first date.
The game you were playing in the background feels like it has some weird janky physics
When he laughed while I was crying about him threatening to sneak something I can't eat into my food because it would make me throw up. I kept telling him so. He would keep laughing and pressuring me. That should've been it. It wasn't.
so how are you now?
@@iwishiwasfaster The best I can say is I'm healing. He made me feel like he was the best I'll ever have. It's taking time but I'm starting to feel like I'm worthy of kindness again.
@@Josmusicandcovers8285 I am happy that you are happy about being happy with moving on. wishing you the best.
Was a senior in high school. I was on the baseball team and was dating a softball player. We were working out together one day in the offseason and some kids were playing basketball nearby. She said to me “I think only white people should be allowed to play baseball and only black people should be allowed to play basketball.”
Needless to say, are both white. She also said this knowing that I had played on my middle school’s basketball team. I just said “I’m sorry you feel that way. Have a nice life” and that was how that relationship ended
Ol girl and I was introduced thru a mutual friend, and I met her when her baby daddy was still in the picture so he knew me… but I was with someone else at the time. Fast forward a few months, me and the girl I was had ended because she straight up replaced me (an L I will never accept again). Lemme tell you, after she had done that, was absolutely the lowest point of my emotional life… ever! So after 6 months of that torment and I met someone 20x better, I just so happened to run into the first girl. I’m a very dramatic scene where someone had tried to come back and even raided my neutral friends house. The boy cried and cried (pathetically) for the girl I was referencing at the beginning. Mind you, the baby daddy is now in jail because he put hands on his baby mother. I stepped in and got the guy to leave and I guess she found me extremely attractive for doing so. A week later was thanksgiving and she confessed to me that she wanted to be with me. I was already considering the better person for a long time, but no harm in playing the field right? So we talked all Friday, and we hung out that Saturday and had sexy time after just one movie. She was into it, if not her acting needs a Grammy award.
The girl barely talked to me the next day and over the course of the week, started arguments and then love bombed me. I saw her again at my friends house that Friday and she was apologetic for a second, and before I knew it, she grabbed me by the throat and tried to choke me. I was so flabbergasted. I was like “ahhhh, no!”. So I thought that was the end, but it wasn’t.
A few weeks later she calls me to tell me she’s pregnant. I’m like, okay, I’ll take the baby and she says she’s not sure it is. She said her previous partners “wore condoms” but I was the only one that she was raw with. Turns out she was with someone else the next day (explains her rarely texting me back after the back and forth for 2 days). The other dude wanted nothing to do with the kid, so she ended up aborting it, but tells our mutual friend she wishes she can try again with me and she made the fat mistake considering the other dudes clearly wanted nothing to do with her, and I was willing to try.
Now I’m with the woman that is 20x better and I couldn’t ask for a better partner.
Dude decided to break up with me through text because I didn't respond to his first text in less than 2 min, we were both in school, in class, at the time he texted, and teachers are known for making you either keep your phone in your bag or surrender it. His texting rage lasted all of 10 min of yelling at me at random and then suddenly saying he was going to break up with me. When I got out of class I saw his whole one sided melt down 😐 so I just went, "ok." and that was the end of it. The relationship didn't even last a month, so it’s not like we were serious yet or had some history which led up to that, he just entirely blew up all on his own for no reason.
Afterwards I sometimes saw him around, if he was trying to make me chase him or if his friends were playing a joke, he should've said something, but he never did. So I assumed he was just some nut and left it at that.
The next guy I dated tried to ask me out right after that nut, but I figured I'd keep us at the friend level, at least until I knew he wasn't just another nut job. 6 months later and we start dating, I figure a guy who's that patient actually cares about me at least to some degree, and he seemed nice. Fast forward 3 years, we're both in college, but while I stuck with a college close to home he went across state. Both for financial and family reasons on both sides. But the distance really brought to light some sides to him that I really couldn't live with. He had no self initiative, I had to constantly be the counselor, it was always about him, his personality began to change to the point that the guy I fell in love with disappeared almost entirely, he never stood up for himself, blamed everyone else for his problems, and the icing on the cake was he couldn't bare to bring himself to leave mommy no matter how badly he was being treated. He was a healthy, young, guy with talent and a kind soul, but he let everyone around him control everything he did and how he felt, to the point he became a snot nosed brat who couldn't make a single decision by himself to save his own life.
While he was getting all upset about some random chick not being nice to him, I was back home bouncing from doctor to doctor, losing my job, dropping out of college, and going through hellish pain and gradually becoming bed ridden. And he couldn't be bothered to stop talking about himself long enough to listen to what little good news I wanted to talk about, let alone all the bad news, the only time he listened was when I played psychologist with him and in the end he never actually listened to all that either.
But, I actually already knew the relationship wasn't going to work out about 2 years before we finally broke it off. Every time I tried to break up he would have an instant full blown melt down and he wouldn't let up until all my attempts to breakup were undone. If he wasn't such a wimp and an idiot I'd have upgraded him to a manipulative dumb ass. The only reason I never solidified my resolve to end it was because, 1) I don't like hurting people, 2) he only showed up in person once or twice a year so it's not like he was a part of my life or anything substantial, and 3) ...I was fucking lonely and was hoping he'd be able to live with the friend zone again since all we ever did was talk over long distance, but of course he played the immature card so many times I was just so sick of the yoyo effect he kept going at that point. He just refused to accept that I didn't want to be with him like that anymore and I was tired of waiting for him to be there for me.
(Had it been a different situation I would've been more forceful about making sure it was over.)
the one selling cookies isn't in customer service, they are in sales.
Thanks for the video
I was a couple months out of a LTR and a girl I'd been fooling around with (at her pressuring) told me she was "smitten". Normally I'd be down with that, but she had already told me the story of her recent ex. They'd been fooling around for a bit and she wanted to make things exclusive. He didn't. So when they got drunk with a bunch of friends she said, "if you don't make me your girlfriend, I'm gonna fuck your roommate."
Nope.
When i kept telling him i wasnt ready for sex and he kept trying to convince me to the point where when on his couch in his parents house he woke me up with his hand in my shirt, trying to turn me on.
Don't stay with someone just to fix them or their " I see your potential in this or that"
Nope what you see in their present is a baseline of what you're going to get.
People like to marry someone like their parents because that's what they know ( don't if you got issues, again ain't your problem to fix them. Leave the bad situations and don't repeat them)
Date someone with the actions you want. If their all talk and no act they just lying you up, and go into the immediate I want to get into your pants and want xyz category.
I'd rather them say it once and do it a lifetime.
Than say they're going to do it a lifetime and only do it once.
Stories like this are one of the primary reasons I am still single.
I hate to admit it, but my last relationship I spent way too much time on; ultimately I hope it's for the better of my ex, but who knows? They would tell me about how excited they were to be married to me, then tell me how they don't plan on living past 40. I'd get messages every week or two about if I love them, do I really care about them and it became exhausting to feel like I had to justify my love for them that it really killed my love for them. How ironic, their desires to hear how much I love them through self esteem issues lead to me not loving them anymore. We had a very civil break up, a good 2 hour talk and plans to stay friends... They then posted a huge very harsh rant on a discord we're both in about me and conveniently leaving out their negatives, I'm not perfect and I'm sure there's plenty I could've done better, but that doesn't immediately negate their downfalls.
Sounds to me like your ex was an insecure narcissist.
I caught her cheating on me... with her sister.
Then I found out she was still technically married.
And she didn't want to wait until we were married to make love because she was religious but because she was pre-operation trans and was hoping I wouldn't find out before she could get an operation.
0:46 sweet summer child, that's called gaslighting. 😊
The first story he gasped her
i met someone via the internet , at the time i had money and a large business and the person let it slip the only reason they liked me was to get a deep discount on my merchandise, then the person started to go after a sibling which also did not go anywhere , . lived in a very small town at the time and found out through others that the person got married to someone else that had good paying job then they rented a house together and the person move in there mother to live with them
story 10: “it’s just a prank bro”
Dated a woman for four years and liked her quite a bit. She had two daughters. One night I rented a movie and we were half way through it when one of her daughters came into the room and said mom I need you to take me over to so and so's and I told (another girl) you'd pick her up on the way. No please or could you at all. My girlfriend jumps up and is ready to leave. I said aren't we in the middle of a movie. She said this is what I want to do. I said okay and broke up with her. I didn't expect to be first over her kids but at least show me some respect. Years down the road I married a widow with no children. We've been happy together for 30 years now and she treats me as if I'm the only other person in the world.
“Life”
4:19 I have several questions that I’m not sure I want the answer to….
Nope nope nope absolutely not ..all of this.
I nope out of a relationship pretty much after discovering they're an NPC. Meaning, they have no actual personality - their entire persona is built around the Disney model that is appealing to the most amount of people.
Respectfully. There is no way at least one of these stories happened in Europe. Correct me if I'm wrong.
Ayyy I’m here early for once 😮
Story 24: she def ordered all that food to take to her kids and bf most likely..I hear stories of girls doing that on facebook
Story 7 😂
What is the thumbnail from?
I also dated this girl who would threaten to kill herself if something didn’t go her way (I’m pretty sure she was bipolar but still)
Story 6. "I don't know why". Really?
What is this game i need to know
I almost claimed this comment section 🥲
Its not toxic.
@@StolenStars. what?
@@Sonicthedrip You son of an angel. You edited your comment...
Kindness to everyone
@@StolenStars. lol
My girlfriend told me something I didn't completely understand then I said the wrong thing and I messed up the whole entire relationship she decided to guilt trip me for the next few years saying that it was my fault ain't my fault entirely because she did an expert in this situation to me
So many people think they are better communicators than they really are and have no patience for working through confusion. I’m trying to distance myself from people like that.
I CLAIM THIS COMMENT SECTION
I hereby claim the response section for the Emperor.
By a few seconds
No you do not it is a public space "karen"
@beep boop, I also claim this place I claim title "reply king".
@@timothyfish4299 of course
First lady should have collected evidence of her fiance's true nature and hired a hitman to cripple him FOR life to put him in his place!😡
Story 30: isn't the idea of ture sex is you both love and trust each other. I mean that's how I prefer it. Still a virgin but that's how I would want it.
That might make you a demisexual-someone who only gets sexually attracted to people they form a strong emotional bond with.
Burh i would not risk my life for a girl
Eek
6:45 9:01
Story 15… in five years she will be like why can’t I get married? Where’s all the good guys.
He’s in your past… 😂 I’ve heard this story countless times from 35+ women.
23 minutes
e
i was dating a "nice" guy (when i was 16). I should have saw signs when one of his dads was abusive to the dog.
After like some months/years of dating. Found out he groomed a fkn kid and was dating his other dad... i left on stealth.
Aw man. Stories like this act like confirmation bias for me ... Can't trust women enough to let myself be in a relationship
story 22 and her talking about the stepdad. Guys, NEVER EVER talk about your feelings or insecurities or trauma with a woman. She ALWAYS use it against you at some point. She files it away and bides the time and when she'll need to, she'll drag it out and use it against you. Keep your shit to yourself
Maybe I'm not a girly girl, but this isn't true. We don't all do that. You've just had some female dogs.
Ah yes, because all women are the exact same 😑
TW: Threats of self h*rm/ su*cide, emotional ab*se
Had an ex who was, pretty much, emotionally abusive. We dated back in September of 2019 and it lasted about 5 months. It started off pretty good, but it quickly turned south in about the 3 month line. He started out by saying that it’s okay for me to speak my mind more. I started to have my own opinion on what I thought he could work on, along with myself, to make the relationship work more. He took it very personally and he kept on going on about how he’s such a horrible person and he left messages about how he’s going to hurt himself or unalive himself. As the people pleaser I was (and still kinda am plz help), I started to profusely apologize because there’s no way in hell I want to be the reason why someone would hurt or off themselves. I didn’t want anyone to hurt themselves for any reason! This went on until February of 2020 and I got an Insta DM from a friend of his and there were screenshots of him having explicit conversations with a friend of theirs. He even said in the messages that “ His girlfriend wasn’t ready for this kind of stuff yet”, which angered me and he clearly knew what he was doing was wrong and messed up. I got super pissed and was so hurt seeing those messages that I stepped out of the classroom to cry in the hallway. I confronted my ex with the messages after that class and that was the last straw for me. I broke up with him that day and I told him that I wasn’t going to put up with this kind of abuse.
After the breakup, he started to stalk me through Instagram for a year and a half. I had to lean on my friends to defend me because at that point, I was scared to death of him and I didn’t want him to have the opportunity to speak to me again with the idea of possibly manipulating me again. When my friends were messaging him to leave me alone, he acted as if he was on the moral high ground and he played dumb about having no idea how he traumatized me. He finally left me alone and it’s been almost 2 years since then. He moved across the country and I can finally breathe and not worry about him contacting me anymore.
Content Warning: Abuse, P3d0ph1lia, Inc3st.
Dated a guy I met once. I didn't realize that a 21 year age difference was so bad, because he was so sweet and charming. I was in the puppylove stage. I (21F) tried to date my ex fiance (42M). Found out after six months and after I moved in, that he was a p3d0, had served ten years in prison for it (the poor girl was 11. He was 31.), and he was emotionally and intimately abusive. (: He wanted an open relationship, so I agreed, but i wasnt really with anyone else bc i was in the puppylove stage for him. He also wanted to 'share' me.. But didnt want me to be with anyone else, unless HE chose the person. Don't try to date men twice your age, my loves!
You should have just shot the bastard. There is nothing more evil, pathetic and despicable than abusing helpless animals. And while I am here, how the hell did you have such bad judgment as to be with such a sub human?